Safe driving is i mportantl - If we can eat, why can't we talk? Student art of the week

Anyone can get published Submissions will be edited fur clarity NEWS SUBMISSIONS [email protected] en in the Other Press! Just email and style. -· )K>Ur story to the appropriate section The Other Press will pay $50 to SPORTS SUBMISSIONS editodi'om the list on the right any student who writes an article of [email protected] = Please send )K>Urfile as an MS Word at least 1,000 WOlds fur the "features" A&E SUBMISSIONS a: doc file, and include )K>Urfull name, section. Submit story ideas to the [email protected] email address, and word count · Editor in Chief. Offer good once per semester per student FEATURE ARTICLES The weekly deadline for [email protected] = The Other Press holds weekly staff ... submissions is Wednesday night for publication the following Monday. meetings at6 PM on Mondays in OPINION SUBMISSIONS [email protected] ... Letters to the Editor and "time­ room 1020oftheNewWestminster sensitive• articles (weekend news, campus. All interested students are ... welcome. sports, and rultural reviews) will be a: accepted until Saturday at noon and - can be submitted to the editor at [email protected]

• THE OTHER PRESS Student Newspaper of Douglas College PUBLISHED SINCE 1976

NEWS Room 1020 - 700 Douglas College Week of Welcome a big success at Douglas. - Kristina Mameli, Pg. 4 Royal Avenue, New Westminster, BC V3L 562 OPINIONS TELEPHONE: 604.525.3542 The first article in our money-saving series EDITOR IN CHIEF Liam Britten has you eating better for less. [email protected] - Grace B. Neptuno, Pg. 6 ASSISTANT EDITOR Chloe Bach FEATURE [email protected] There's more to being a mechanic than the fashionable BUSINESS MANAGER & coveralls. ADVERTISING - Will Stearn, Pg. 14, 15 Mark Fisher [email protected] ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT I NEWS EDITOR After giving out cars, Oprah starts giving us her John Morrison III favourite tunes [email protected] - Jay Schreiber, Pg. 13 STAFF REPORTER Kristina Mameli (acting) SPORTS [email protected]

We look ahead to the upcoming year in Douglas SPORTS EDITOR sports. Garth Mclennan - Garth Mclennan, Pg. 19 [email protected] ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Jay Schreiber [email protected]

OPINIONS EDITOR Shoshana Berman [email protected]

HUMOUR EDITOR Liam Britten [email protected]

GRAPHICS Timothy Arndt [email protected]

LAYOUT Brian Yoo [email protected]

ILLUSTRATOR Ellen Lee [email protected]

PHOTOGRAPHER Rosa Hong WHO WEARE [email protected] The Other Press has been Douglas College's student newspaper since 1976. levy collected through tutition fees every semester at registration, and from Since 1978 we have been an autonomous publication, independent of the local and national advertising revenue. The Other Press is a member of the WEBSITE EDITOR/I.T. Angela Szczur student union. Today we are registered society under the Society Act of Canadian University Press (CUP), a syndicate of student newspapers that [email protected] British Columbia, governed by an eight-person board of directors appointed includes papers from all across Canada. by and from our staff. Our head office is located in the New Westminster The Other Press reserves the right to choose what we will publish, and we DISTRIBUTION MANAGER campus. will not publish material that is hateful, obscene, or condones or promotes The Other Press is published weekly during the fall and winter semesters, illegal activities. Submissions may be edited for clarity and brevity if Garth Mclennan and monthly during the summer. We receive our funding from a student necessary. All images used are copyright to their respective owners. 2

,~.,._.. ,•1 ,,·:·:.:',' ' t t t t f t f ~ t t f t t t t t t' • I ~ ~ r. f' _ ~ •. f> • t # • .. " • • ,. ~ # t • t t t t t t t r t t • # f' • ., • f' f t t f" t t J t t t t An open letter to Judge Redfield T. Baum

Dear Judge Baum, game. I am writing this open letter to you in regards to my HOW WILL YOU PAY THE COYOTES' MANY application for ownership of the Phoenix Coyotes. I CREDITORS IN PHOENIX? Simple. Arizona am keenly interested in buying the team, as you are no senator John McCain owes me a couple of favours, so doubt aware, and I believe that my proposal should be I'm sure he can take care of former owner Jerry Moyes given every bit as much consideration as the proposals and anyone else who demands "repayment." They will of Jim Balsillie and Gary Bettman. I would like to be "repaid" the only way Senator McCain knows how: reiterate my desire to purchase the Phoenix Coyotes he will simply soil his adult diaper and beat anyone and move it to Canada-to the thriving city of Port who demands money to death with it. Besides, Senator Coquitlam, British Columbia. McCain's "advanced" age means he's getting a little Perhaps with all the paperwork and documents funny in the head. If I can convince him that those you've had to pore over these past few weeks, my bid creditors defeated him for the presidency, he'll do it package for the team simply got lost among the shuffle. with a smile on his face. That's quite alright; allow me to jog your memory. It WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO WAYNE GRETZKY? was the package written on rolling papers with plenty Gretzky's tenure as coach of the Coyotes, sadly, will of drawings of me as a hockey-playing king. It was also come to an end. Poor Wayne just isn't made to coach the one addressed to "Judge Popcorn Guy" (totally my a hockey team, and perhaps it's best for him to move bad; I confused you with Orville Redenbacher. Your on. However, that doesn't mean that we won't have names are both so similar, you know?). It also contained a place for him in the organization. We were hoping several !]lousand dollars worth of small, unmarked bills, to construct a bronze statue of Gretzky hoisting the which must have gotten in there accidentally, if you Stanley Cup, similar to the one in Edmonton. But do catch what I mean, wink, wink. you realize how much bronze costs?! Holy cow! It I'm sure after you read my proposal package would be far cheaper to pay Wayne $10 an hour to hold for the future PoCo Coyotes you were impre~ed a Stanley Cup all day and tell everyone we have a "wax and awestruck. I'm sure you were floored by how sculpture" in our facility. much research and careful planning had been done WHERE WILL YOU GET THE $250 MILLION for my application and I'm sure you were tempted to TO OUTBID JIM BALLSILLIE? Uhh ... simply give me the team outright. And I'm sure the As you can see, my bid for the Phoenix Coyotes ... incriminating photos I included in the package of you sorry, the Port Coquitlam Coyotes, is simply the best and your legal secretary just sealed the deal. for everyone considered. The Coyotes players will play But, in case you still have questions beyond "Liam in a vibrant market, creditors will be repaid, and the Britten, are you a god?" I am more than happy to Coyotes' former home at Jobing.com Arena can finally answer all of them to your fullest satisfaction. Read on, be used for something far more useful,like maybe a and I'm sure you will find that I have thought of every storage facility for construction equipment. possible snag and obstacle between myself and NHL I thank you for considering my application, Judge team ownership and I'm sure the solutions will be more Baum, and I wish you and your secretary many happy, than satisfactory. quiet years together. WHY MOVE THE TEAM TO PORT COQUITLAM? Simple. Port Coquitlam, British Your friend in high fidelity, Columbia, has been ranked as Canada's 36,0781h best Liam Britten city, slightly worse than Pooptown, Alberta, but just President and CEO better than Hamilton. It contains a skating rink in the The Port Coquitlam Coyotes city's bustling downtown core/hobo urination area that can easily contain all 55 of the Coyotes' fans. As well, the city's well-known drug problems will be instrumental in attracting our first big signing, Theoren F1eury, whose own substance problems mean that he would probably fit in perfectly. Competition with the Vancouver Canucks for fans will be non-existent; if history has taught us anything, Canucks fans will immediately jump off the Vancouver bandwagon and onto the Coyotes' as soon as the 'Nucks lose their first

Staff Reporter: Duties include conducting interviews, writing news stories, and assisting news editor as necessary. Low time commitment! Must have excellent writing ability. Pay: $250 per month News Editor: The news editor position will soon be available. If you are interested please submit an application! We're looking for someone with an engaging writing style, varied interests and a desire to contribute. Please apply! Pay: $400 per month

Submit your application to [email protected] Left-wing groups criticize provincial budget update Douglas College Wrap-Up The BCNDP, CF5-BC, and CCPA comment on budget cuts affecting students, families By Kristina Marnell By John Morrison Ill, News Editor

remier Gordon Campbell and the BC Liberals announced an update to the provincial budget on PSeptember 1 which received a failing grade from left-wing groups including the B.C. New Democratic Party, Canadian Federation of Students, and the Canadian Centre for Policy Alternatives. Despite promises that the deficit will not exceed $500 million in the lead up to the May 12 provincial election this year, the budget update included a deficit of $2.8 billion. "Today 's budget is an admission that the B.C. Liberals misled the public and have no ideas about how to deal with the economic downturn," said New Democrat leader Carole James. The budget also included a rise in Medical Services Plan premiums, which will increase for the first time since 2002 come January 1 by a maximum of $3 per person or $6 per family extra each month. James added," . . . just as families are struggling to emerge from the downturn the Liberals' only answer is a new tax and hikes to MSP premiums." Students will be affected by cuts including $16.2 million of Students-British Columbia. from Student Aid BC and $37.7 million from institutional A report from the Canadian Centre for Policy Alternatives funding. Tuition fees have more than doubled since Gordon agrees. Campbell was elected Premier in 2001. Since then, the BC "Spending cuts will make it harder for low and middle Liberal government has eliminated the provincial grants income British Columbians to weather the recession . .. . We program and with the non-renewal of the Canadian Millennium cannot afford to push more people into hardship," said a CCPA Scholarship Foundation, through which the province forgave statement. provincial student loan debt, pursuing a post-secondary is more Colin Hansen, finance minister, defended the budget in costly than ever before. a written statement, pointing out that as of January 1, 2010, "Borrowing beyond your means is never a wise strategy, individual British Columbians earning up to $118,000 annually yet that is precisely what thousands of B.C. families are forced will pay the lowest provincial personal income taxes in Canada. Scholarship calls for applicants to do every year to afford this government's massive tuition fee He believes those savings will provide taxpayers with increased Applications for the Brodie Osborne­ increases," said a representative from the Canadian Federation financial flexibility and help stimulate the economy. Campbell Memorial Scholarship are being accepted until September 30. The scholarship is only available to Week of Welcome a success full-time Criminology students making the Office for New Students, Douglas Students' Union welcome new and returning students transition from first to second year with a 3 5 minimum GPA. The scholarship honours Brodie By Kristina Mameli, Acting Staff Reporter to familiarize themselves with the campus, make new Osborne-Campbell, a Charles Best Secondary friends, and ease their way into post-secondary life. The student who died tragically in April 2007 of eek of Welcome at Douglas enthusiastically Douglas Students' Union offered a free pancake breakfast and a bacterial meningitis infection at age 15. to welcomed new and returning students back agendas; various booths were set up in the concourse offering Brodie was the only son of Douglas College class with an impressive showcase of what life at information from campus organizations and clubs, free cola, W Criminology instructor Colin Campbell and Douglas College can offer. Officiated by the Office for New popcorn, and the chance to play Rock Band. The Beat 94.5 Judith Osborne. Students (ONS), Week of Welcome is an important part of the was live on location, even featuring a DJ-all providing the For applications and more information, school's orientation program which was reinvigorated and has groundwork for a well-rounded student experience. visit www.douglas.bc.ca/programs/ excelled since the ONS was created three years ago. The ONS has also had success with their Student criminology. "We were created out of a strategic initiative where Ambassador program. The student leadership program was the college kind of looked at itself and [asked] what are we started when the ONS was created as well, and features student doing well? What can we improve on? One of the things volunteers with at least one semester under their belts. Douglaa does the Grind for Uganda they thought they could improve on was retention of current ''The idea is to bring students in 365 days a year. We slot Instructors and students from the Community students, retention of incoming students, and the support of them into the training process," said Baillie. ''They're doing Social Service Worker and Co-occurring incoming anything from Disorders Programs will take on North students," looking at academic Vancouver's treacherous Grouse Grind on said Kyle "It'• not how long you're here; It'• the quality of the experience while leadership theory, to Sunday October 18 in an effort to raise money Baillie, you're here. n -Kyle Baillie, manttger of the Office for New Student• event management for the College's Uganda Project. manager to personnel The Uganda Project. in conjunction with of the management to the Ugandan consulate of B.C. and Douglas Office for New Students. "So as part of our overall orientation social responsibility issues to environmental issues. It's College's Community Social Service Worker program, Week of Welcome is one component that we use to individual to the student'ambassador." Prognsm, sends students from the cssw to try and make students more comfortable, to make sure that So what makes a good Student Ambassador? "We're Uganda on work experience trips where they they have all the information that they need and the ability to looking for people who just want to make a difference in the work with community service and health care get engaged." community, who want to contribute back, to learn something facilities. Studies show that students who are more involved in their new, beyond that we sort of customize it. It gets students to You can help CSSW students further schools are more successful academically. take what they're learning in the classroom and apply it in a their education by hitting the trail yourself and ''The three main things that help students to be successful, real world setting." collecting pledges or by supporting others. The hilre is weather-dependent. particularly in their first year on campus, are that they forge "Even though people are here sometimes for a very short For more information or pledge fonns, a meaningful relationship with a faculty member. They forge amount of time," smiled Baillie. "It's not how long you're contact Bob Shebib at [email protected] a meaningful relationship with a staff member or if they here; it's the quality of the experience while you're here." or Lawrence Becker at beckerl@douglas. get involved with a club or group or activity on campus," If you'd like to get involved with the ONS or apply to be bc.ca, or check out http://www.douglas.bc.ca/ explained Baillie. "So the idea is that although our office can't a Student Ambassador, visit http://www.douglas.bc.ca/new­ programslcommunity-social-aervicelafrica. control the notion of forging a meaningful relationship with a students/office-new-students.html. html. faculty member, we can influence the other two." Week of Welcome offered a variety of ways for students 4 U pissed About U-Pass? Student unions of UBC, Douglas, Emily Carr and VCC join forces to demand a $25 universal U-Pass for all Metro Vancouver students.

By Kristina Mameli, Acting Staff Takkar said at the rally. "We're forced to pay all Metro Vancouver students." Reporter three times as much to ride the same transit The group's last official correspondence system." with TransLink in May 2007 offered schools ree pancake breakfast presented According to a survey conducted on such as Douglas, Emily Carr and VCC a y the Douglas Students Union behalf of the group by McAllister Opinion $34 per month bus pass. The offer quickly hursday offered students food and expired also some food for thought. and fell Student unions from Douglas College, "We're forced to pay three times as much to ride the short of University of British Columbia, Emily Carr same transit system." - VCC student Nimmi Takkar and Vancouver Community College came together to launch an ambitious campaign urging Premier Gordon Campbell to make Research, 90 per cent of the 1 ,734 students furthering the cause of acquiring a universal good on his election promise to implement surveyed said they want to see a $25 pass. an affordable, universal transit pass for all universal bus pass, and 96 per cent said "We stand here today hopeful that we Metro Vancouver students. that the U-Pass should be available to all will be able to soon congratulate the Premier The overall goal of the OnePassNow that they present a FastTrax transit strip students at the same price. and the B.C. government for announcing the campaign, which uses social media such adorning their student cards. "There's an overwhelming consensus details of a $25 per month Metro Vancouver as texting, email, Facebook, YouTube and "To make things worse, last week, among students that it's time for the U-Pass," Wolf stated. "We 're also sending a Twitter to relay their message to students, TransLink announced that they will be government and TransLink to stop clear message to the Premier and TransLink is a $25 per month U-Pass for over 100,000 increasing their monthly fare passes by 10 oftloading their Olympic debts and that students will wait no longer." post-secondary students in Metro Vancouver. per cent, raising it to $81 making it that overspending onto students," said Priscilla For more information and campaign UBC and SFU students pay an average much less affordable for students like me to Wolf, DSU external relations coordinator. videos visit Onepassnow.ca. of $25 per month for a U-Pass, as opposed to get to school. This extra $56 dollars a month "We want Premier Campbell to keep his the $73 per month all others pay stipulating makes a difference," VCC student Nimmi promise of expanding the U-Pass program to

Commuters, residents have mixed feelings about Canada Line News Shorts

By John Morrison Ill

Turing receives posthumous apology Last week, The Other Press reported on the petition demanding a posthumous apology from the British government for the treatment of Alan Turing, a World War II -era codebreaker and founder of computing science who was prosecuted for being gay. Two years later, Turing took his own life. On September 10, Prime Minister Gordon Brown made an official public apology on behalf of the British government for the way Thring was treated during the war. Gay rights activist Peter Tatchell claims a similar apology is due for an estimated 100,000 British men who suffered similar treatment. "Singling out Turing just because he is famous is wrong," he told BBC News. There hasn't been anything that we can't deal with," says Crombie. "Big Five" universities make grab for more he Canada Line, a new rapid transit line Other commuters have complained about research funding servicing Vancouver, Richmond, and the inconvenient bus transfers and the cancellation of T Vancouver International Airport opened on certain routes that are now considered redundant Canada's top five August 17 with a mix of praise and complaints. While with the introduction of the Canada line. Vancouver universities- Toronto, many commuters, especially travelers, have praised resident Clifford Chan told the Vancouver Sun that he Montreal, Alberta, British Columbia, and McGill-are calling for a greater share of "These are things that happen with a new system. There hasn't been research funding. anything that we can't deal with." -Steve Crombie, In Transit The "big five" already receive over $250 million of the $2.5 billion given the convenience it provides, some are not impressed. expects difficulty getting to and from the station to his out annually by the federal Some residents living near the 19 kilometres of home. government, according track have complained about the noise it produces. "I expected bus service right outside the exit on to Jacob Serebin of The Leslie DeSchutter, who resides near the Langara- Davie Street. Instead, we had to walk three blocks Concordian. 49tb Street Station, says the station's exhaust fans uphill to Richards Street to connect to the Number 6 The presidents of the have disrupted his property's liveability, reports the bus." five major universities Vancouver Courier. Not everyone is unhappy, however. The Other in Canada are calling "They aimed the exhaust fans directly at our Press spoke to James MacKenzie who praised the for national debate on the future of post-secondary education house instead of towards Cambie," DeSchutter Canada Line for cutting six minutes out of his daily in Canada, while representatives from other universities are complains, "My 93-year-old grandmother lives with commute. speaking out against it. us, I can't even have a conversation with her 10 feet "Anything that enables me to hit the snooze The presidents of Western and Concordia both expressed away in the backyard." button one more time gets a thumbs-up from me," disapproval of the idea of transferring further funding to the larger Steve Crombie, spokesperson for InTransit, said James, who lives in Richmond and works near universities. the company contracted to build and maintain the Waterfront. "The ride is really smooth and the stations "So, should we be looking at re-dividing the research automated transit system, says they are doing their are all very clean and organized." pie among 'elites' and 'the others?' Instead of fighting over best to solve the problem. InTransit is currently The line, originally called the Richmond-Airport­ the crumbs, perhaps we need to bake a larger pie so that our designing a shield to muffle the sound and expects to Vancouver line, was completed 15 weeks ahead of universities thrive across this country;• said Judith Woodsworth, have it installed, "in the next couple of weeks." its original schedule. It is expected to bear 100,000 president of Concordia Univeristy, in a written statement. "These are things that happen with a new system. hoardings by 2010. 5 Starving student myth debunked ______.:....._ ___

By Grace B. Neptuno staples are on sale, try to stock spare eleven dollars for five days? cheese and hot dogs seem like a good deal, up with a reasonable amount. Can your waistline? you're not four years old. Save your dollars ou made it through the first week But if you don't need ten tins of 9. Use Supercook.com. There was and your health. A few minutes of planning of college, bought your books, paid diced tomatoes, don't buy ten just a week when this writer subsisted out your menu and your weekly shopping Y your bills and now you're starving. because they're on sale. on nothing but found food. Don't list can result in savings that you can use Nearly every student goes through an instant 5. Create a weekly menu plan. This know what that is? You will soon. towards other things. Like beer. noodles phase during college. You don't helps with time management as If you are down to your last bits have to be another malnutritioned statistic. well as working with the grocery of food, enter your ingredients Next week in the Students and Money series: Take note of some of the tips below to flyers. Keep it simple: seven into Supercook.com and it saving on entertairzment. help you stretch your food dollars and keep breakfasts, seven lunches, seven will generate recipes for you. you from those notoriously B-I-G hips that dinners and snacks in between. Hopefully you're hungry enough students tend to develop during their first Watch your time: if you have a to be a bit ... creative. year. Yes, guys, that goes for your poochy night class, it makes no sense to 10. Bring your own coffee mug bellies too. make a dinner that takes an hour to school. At nearly two dollars 1. Make a list for the grocery store to bake. each for coffee, at two coffees per and stick to it. Do not deviate 6. Make a vegetarian meal once day, it's costing you $20 a week from your list. lf you write seven a week. Meat costs more. If you Monday to Friday. By bringing items on your list, make sure you really must chew on something your own mug, you'll save about come out with seven items. then try adding mushrooms, 10 per cent off the price of a 2. Compare prices. Check the squash or tofu to your vegetarian coffee. grocery store's online flyers to meal. 11. Brew your own. Better yet, take comparison shop before heading 7. Don't buy junk food. You don't the $20 you would save by buying out. A few detours could save you need it. A chocolate bar costs your own large tin of coffee and precious dollars. more than two apples. Decide if brewing it at home to take to 3. Bring cash. Leave your debit card it's worth it. That's your body school with you. Even better, give and that naughty credit card at we're talking about. up coffee. Water is free. home. Stick to the grocery list and 8. Bring your own lunch. Don't Remember, processed foods can end up you won't come up short. Those buy food at the cafeteria. A burger being more costly than fresh foods and most unexpected items add up. at the college costs as much as of your money is going towards packaging. 4. Buy only on-sale items. If eleven dollars. Can you really So even though a few purchases of mac 'n'

Education minister drops the ball I don't mean to say "I told you so" but. .. Why can't a little funding for school sports be found?

By Garth Mclennan has nothing to do with the fact that I'm the sports editor of this newspaper, I'm asking n a recent interview with the Vancouver this objectively. I understand that there Sun, B.C. education minister Margaret have to be cuts all around, but arts groups I MacDiarmid added to the growing can keep $20 million worth of funding but list of Liberal bungles with one of the $130,000 can't be found for sports? That single stupidest comments in B.C. political just doesn't seem very fair. history. The value of a team on an athlete's life In response to a query about the slashing can't be understated. Aside from the natural of $130,000 worth of funding towards value of teamwork, fair play and work ethic B.C. school sports, MacDiarmid had the teams instil, there are tons of kids out there following to say: "Rather than formal team who would have fallen through the cracks sports, maybe people will be doing more if not for team sports. For most high school walking or dancing or playing in parks." sports, a certain grade point average is Wow, is this a joke? Talk about required for athletes to continue competing. rubbing salt in the wounds. Not only is she So, if the guy on the volleyball or rugby dropping grants that were the lifeline of team can't play in Saturday's game if he By Jay Schreiber Timmy's is quite respectable in a college several sports, she actually has the gall to doesn't go to chemistry class, that's a environment, but why leave discarded traces condescendingly encourage student athletes strong motivation to stay in school and ast winter, I forewarned the dangers of the company everywhere? People please, to do more walking or dancing or playing in work hard. Just think about how many of of installing a Tim Horton's on the we may be college students but can we keep parks. That is just plain insulting. those kids wouldn't care at all if it weren't L New West Campus. The satisfaction the place from looking like a dump? This I get that there have to be cutbacks. for high school sports. that comes to every college student with isn't Metrotown! I understand that in the current economic Now, I'm not underestimating the their coffee fix in before those dreaded Tim Horton was a very well respected climate, some programs and areas are going benefits that kids get from arts programs, 8:30 a.m. classes does make the day run Canadian hockey player whose legacy to have to take a hit. That's just a reality because they probably play a very similar smoother. However, there's something we lives on through his delicious bagels and of the world we live in, and there is no role in the lives of students. It just doesn't should all be aware of. affordable iced cappuccino's. Cleaning reason why sports should be exempt from seem fair that athletics have to bear the On the first day of classes, I made up his garbage is only suitable to serve in cutbacks. However, the week before the brunt of budget cuts, while arts funding my way from the 3rd floor down the great his memory, even though he did play for cuts to sporting programs were announced, escapes unscathed. Why are arts more grey and yellow staircase that adorns the Toronto, the trash team of the NHL. White grants and funding to a number of arts deserving of tax payers' dollars? Again, I'm concourse and lo and behold, my prediction Spot usually keeps things pretty clean in groups were cut as well. The public not saying that sport shouldn't have any had become reality. There was litter, litter parallel to their name, and for some reason everywhere, an entire sea of maroon cups most of their packaging ends up in the outcry was tremendous and the Liberal money cut, I'm just saying that there is a and brown paper bags. Tim Horton's had garbage. Go, Nat Bailey, go! government hastily restored the funding to blatantly unfair double standard going on successfully taken over the concourse with So remember to clean up your garbage. some 520 different arts groups that totalled here, and when you have politicians such truckloads of garbage that made me swear I for one don't want to walk through hordes around $20 million. as Margaret MacDiarmid spouting off lines off honey crullers for a week! of packaging in the concourse. This brown Now, what makes arts more worthy like hers that only becomes more apparent. Granted, the cheap, quick and dirty paper bag in front of me is going where it of funding than high school sports? This way that students get delicious food from belongs-in the trash! 6 Backsides or burkas? Print (or at least longhand) is dead One student's attempt to complete a paperless school year

By Shoshana Berman, Opinions Editor card catalogue as scrap paper beside the computers to write down search results. have decided to attempt to have a That's how many cards there were. paperless school year. Now this is I also remember being in a lab on I saying something from a 41-year-old campus where zoology grad students were Luddite and former school teacher. I love talking in awed, hushed tones about people books; I love paper and pens and binders being able to talk to scientists in Russia on and all that stuff. the computer, on the other side of the Iron When I was in grade school Curtain. This was earth shattering. photocopies didn't exist. We copied the So now, many moons later, why am questions in full from the board and then I attempting to do all my school work, wrote the answers in full in our notes. On notes, readings, and correspondence on good days, one lucky student would get the computer and on-line? Yes for the to make dittos for the teacher in the office environment, but I'm also trying to teach by cranking a an old machine full of brain new "My brain Is organized completely differently fume emitting tricks. My purple liquid than those of the 'computer generation' kids. brain is into stinky That's most of you. I want to be like you." organized handouts. Perhaps these made us happy because the fumes gave us a completely differently than those of the buzz at the same time as not having to copy "computer generation" kids. That's most of from the board. This was a rare treat! you. I want to be like you. By Shoshana Berman, Opinions Editor Would it be appropriate to have an The first time I went through I've always been very good at getting article in the student press about strap- university, all essays were hand written. mostly younger people to do the things I n the August issue of The Other Press, on dildos with an accompanying photo Only very wealthy students would pay want done on the computer. I have watched there were three pictures of women's of a male backside? Absolutely! I'd be a dollar a page to get their essays typed. countless people layout and design articles I backsides, one accompanying a parody interested in reading an article about which We used a card catalogue at the library and documents for me, at my instruction. I review of a porno film, which some readers dildo gives the most bang for the buck, to search for materials. There were always tell them they've done a beautiful found offensive. Now perhaps there were a so to speak. How about an article about newspapers from all over the world job. I have always only learned what I had tad too many photos of backsides, but they a lesbian fetish for leather on bikes with physically available every day and we read to do with a program, not what I could do. were not obscene, and certainly not hateful. accompanying semi-clad photo? Great older articles on microfiche. Research was I want to learn what I can do. I want it One was even appropriately within the stuff! done by going to indexes that were actually to be second nature. Perhaps it is not going context of the parody. These photos were That's free expression of sexuality, very large books. to reorganize my brain. Maybe at the end of certainly legal to print and would get past whether straight, gay, transgendered, When I was finishing up for the the semester after having read articles and any censor board in Canada. female, male, fluidly gendered, queer, first time in 1989, three computers were notes on line, I won't remember anything. I noticed when I read the paper that the self-pleasuring, or otherwise. I think these available in the University Centre for Then I'll say, "You really can't teach an photos and content were a little bawdy. Did people were offended because it was a male "inputting" essays in Word Perfect on old dog new tricks" and go back to reading it offend me? No. I thought it might be a heterosexual expression of sexuality and computers run on DOS. There was one books and writing on paper. I'll let you slow news month; but other than that, none not a marginalized expression of sexuality. printer available in the whole university know how I'm progressing. I've already of the images or opinions expressed was I think it's good to notice that and great to of about 18,000 students. The library also hit some bumps in the road that I'll tell you shocking. As well, the cover of the issue want more diverse expressions of sexuality got its first computer catalogue, not online. about next week. We'll see how it goes. was a photo of Rosie the Riveter, with the in student press. It is not okay, however, to The last time I checked it had been over headline article on women and the disabled say that male heterosexual opinion should ten years and they were still using the old being the victims of provincial cuts. It was not be published in this paper. That position hardly an issue that promotes hatred against says to me, as a woman, that freedom of women. sexual expression is not welcome on this I have to say that it is not a news Hash campus. that a good portion of young men, and at There is also a positive correlation least a few women, find female backsides between the repression of sexuality, and attractive. Nor is it something we should the oppression of women. Obviously, try to repress. We could just print pictures many societies repress homosexuality, of coke bottles or orchids if we wanted both male and female; others also repress to be really risque, if you get my point. female heterosexuality. However, the worst Georgia O'Keefe wasn't painting flowers. societies for the oppression of women, Coke bottles are deliberately shaped like also repress male heterosexual expression. women's backsides. The Victorians thought Women have to wear burkas or niqabs, that carved table legs were too suggestive, covering their faces in pubic, for fear of so they covered them with long table cloths. eliciting a male sexual response. Evolutionarily,larger breasts happened The Other Press is the only platform because they mimicked the shape of a for all student voices on this campus. It backside in order to sexually attract males speaks to and for the student s of Douglas after female hominids started walking College. Instead of entering into a dialogue upright. So I assume this attraction has been about including more diverse and inclusive around for quite some time. I personally voices of sexuality in the paper, some prefer to encourage open and honest people wish to be censors. I regret this sexuality, rather than be offended by it. and welcome them to submit articles, I wonder if these same people would suggestions or letters to the paper, thereby been offended if there had been an entering into a constructive dialogue about about the sexual positions that work how we can have a better student voice on for the wonderful variety that exists in campus. As Opinions editor, I welcome all the female anatomy of vaginas, clitorises, forms of sexual expression in the Opinions labia, accompanied by a lovely photo. section of The Other Press. sounds so 90s to be talking about vaginas I'll take a photo of a backside over make a point about the free expression of wearing a burka any day! . I guess butts are the new vaginas. 7 ft. Don't ban cell phones while driving

en By Tanya Colledge things at once: road conditions, pedestrians, obstructions due .. to construction and traffic congestion. Cell phones are much • Over the past couple of decades, cell phones have become less distracting than children arguing in the back seat and a big part of our society. We have grown attached and much more predictable than the cyclists that share the road. •~ accustomed to these devices to help us keep connected Cell phones are merely instruments; they themselves with loved ones in case of emergencie~ but more so, to help are not dangerous. It is the drivers that continue to drive -= us be more productive and efficient with our time. As the intoxicated, aggressively or over the speed limit that we .. = popularity of these devices grows, so do the misconceptions should be concerned about. Drivers falling asleep and that they are swerving out of their ·- dangerous along lanes, tailgating with CD with calls for new "Would you rather see your precious taxpayers' dollars their high beams flashing - regulations to restrict spent helping police officers make more drug busts in in your rear-view mirror their use. our communities or helping them write a ticket to the or under the influence • = It seems that soccer mom calling her babysitter to let her know she'll of illegal substances today our society be late getting home?" should be stopped and = is quick to jump to prosecuted. the conclusion that Unlike talking on a • creating new laws and regulations-instead of enforcing cell phone, driving under the influence is a permanent state current ones-is an effective tactic. However, a law that of distraction that does not disappear until the driver pulls -CD prohibits the use of a handheld device while driving requires into his driveway-if he makes it there. A driver's attention additional time and money for enforcement. Would you while talking on a cell phone is slightly distracted for a mere rather see your precious taxpayers' dollars spent helping couple minutes, and then is able to re-focus 100 per cent -en police officers make more drug busts in our communities once the conversation is over. -- or helping them write a ticket to the soccer mom calling her Of course, half a century ago, no one would ever CD babysitter to let her know she' ll be late getting home? How have imagined that we would be able to drive and talk on would we as citizens, ensure that this new legislation would the phone at the same time, but times change. And as part = be regulated in a fair and honest matter? of a modem, changing world, we should be embracing • a And so I ask myself: where does the encroachment and adapting to change, not rejecting it. Let's not punish of the state into our lives stop? If the government was to everyone for the few who cannot seem to multi task two ban the use of cell phones while driving, should they ban items! We will never be able to progress in anything if we .. -= other distractions such as eating a hamburger while driving, are constantly lowering expectations because a few people = booming speakers, reading a GPS system or map, applying can't seem to manage. makeup or tending to a child in the back seat? After all, cell We have the technology, knowledge and ability to find phones were certainly not the first and only disruption that alternative methods to these new regulations, and therefore - drivers have dealt with over the years. Talking with other should put the onus on cell phone companies to create more • - passengers, smoking, negligent pedestrians, wild animals user and car friendly devices. There are bigger and more a= and offensive drivers are all equally as dangerous, if not important issues such as homelessness and our grotesque worse. provincial and national debt that our government should be A prerequisite to obtaining a driver's license is being worrying about. en-= able to successfully keep one's attention focused on several So hang it up already, there are bigger fish to fry. Driving is a dangerous activity By David Carson an accident simply because your focus was not on the road. Someone might argue that if we ban cell phones, what The B.C. government has promised us a law that would next? Could laws come into force banning eating, drinking, follow Newfoundland, Nova Scotia, Quebec and Ontario and so on, while driving? I for one would welcome those in restricting cell phone use while driving. The minister laws but I don't think we're going to see the day when a of public works, the Honourable Kash Heed, recently cop will pull us over for slurping on a Coke or munching informed the media of the government's plan. on fries . However talking on a cell phone not only takes What he said makes sense. Texting and driving, new your hands away from the wheel, it also occupies your drivers using their phones in any way, and talking without attention and necessarily makes you less aware of your a handheld device all have two things in common: one, surroundings. they're all about to become illegal; two, banning them No more than a week ago, I was driving in the False New legislation In B.C. will see restrictions on cell phone use makes our roads safer. Creek area of Vancouver. As I approached a four-way stop sign, I couldn't help but notice that a woman in a car by drivers. So does this make our roads safer, or Is It just more Driving is a dangerous activity. In cluttered cities, that government Interference In our lives? Will regulations be effec­ tive? Or Is It all worth It In the name of safety? "How could anyone argue against making our roads safer place for us all?"

danger is all the more apparent. Urban drivers must react approaching from across the intersection was talking on to multitudes of potential distractions: pedestrians, cyclists, her cell phone. I also noticed that she was driving very changing traffic patterns and of course, the other drivers on fast. Cautiously, I sat at the stop sign and watched her the city streets,just to name a few. Safe driving demands approach the intersection; then I watched her drive through abSolute focus. Not only are our own lives at stake but the intersection without slowing down-gabbing away, every time we get behind the wheel, we have the capacity completely ignorant to the potential disaster she would to kill or injure everyone around us. It seems only common have caused had I started to make my way. I have no doubt, sense that any distraction purposely added to the equation not a shred, that she was distracted because of her phone. would increase the potential for disaster. How then, in a For this reason, and the safety of everyone who shares supposedly rationally thinking world, could anyone argue the road, I welcome the B.C. government's plan to limit against the B.C. government making it illegal to hold or cell phone use while driving. A conversation is not more operate a cell phone while driving? How could anyone important than safety, and a chat is not more important to argue against making our roads safer place for us all? you than another human's life. The inconvenience of having to wait ten minutes to answer a call is nothing compared to the tragedy of causing 8 The 'Other' News

Continued on page 21 ....

Panda kinda sick of always eating bamboo.

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Contact [email protected] with your story idea before submitting. Real Nigerian prince warns consumers of scam email danger

By Llam Britten a victim's trust, including flattery, nonspecific information and outright lies. ze Nri Enweleana II Obidiegwu 'The reason I want people to know Onyeso, current prince of the about this is because I consider you all EKingdom of Nri in Nigeria, is to be so trustworthy and wise. lndeed, warning Internet users of all stripes to if there were any people who were beware of scarnmers claiming to be him deserving of some of my large fortune, it in order to bilk thousands of dollars would be you," he said. "I cannot reveal illegally. the exact amount of money that I would In a press conference held in the like to give to such kind-hearted people Nigerian capityal of Abuja, Prince as yourselves, as you see the Economic Onyeso warned that scarnmers most and Financial Crimes Commission has commonly will send potential victims forbidden public disclosure of accounts unsolicited emails asking for large built up under the pretence of section amounts of money and said that 41 of the 1982 Taxation Act. However, consumers must not send money as they anyone who hears these comments can request. secure a share by sending me a wire "The scarnmers will try and lie, tell transfer of money to establish a suitable lies, and they will make up vile lies using bank account for international transfers." my own name," he said. "They say that In a follow-up telephone interview if you send them cash that you will be with Prince Onyeso, The Other Press rewarded greatly from my vast personal was told that His Highness has been fortune. This is obviously a lie, as all true imprisoned by corrupt customs officials and honest people know that if they want and needs money wired to Nigeria to pay to share in my fortune, they must send for a bribe. As soon as the money sent cash in envelopes addressed to my palace by The Other Press is received and His in Lagos. That address, by the way, is Highness is released, we will publish a 1000 Royal Boulevard." transcript of an exclusive interview he Prince Onyeso said that scarnmers has promised us. will use all kinds of tactics to earn 10 ~ . .

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11 Baby you're a rich man The newly released definitive Beatles box-set offers glorious remastered sound, eco-friendly packaging

By Corrigan Hammond, The Silhouette produce albums in a more ethical manner only own the complete Beatles discography practice of issuing content on Mondays in (McMaster) and present cover art as "it was originally on CD, but also on vinyl, cassette and Europe and Tuesdays everywhere else, and intended to be." sometimes even eight-track. insisting on the once in a thousand year HAMILTON (CUP) -The last time the Strangely though, the same attention Nothing was left to chance with opportunity of "09/09/09 ." Beatles catalogue was reissued was in 1987. to detail that has produced a beautiful regards to the project's success. Not only Many observers in the record industry The emphasis, however, wasn't on the audio production-the Beatles' trademark did the surviving Beatles, Ringo and Sir are curious to see whether the high-quality quality of the recordings, focusing instead obsession with creating music that is both Paul, reunite on stage this past summer, physical product being placed in stores, on the physical act of making content uncompromisingly artful and undeniably offering the pair a rare moment of genuine complete with limited edition mimeograph available on the new CD format. As a result, popular- may prove to be the project's glee and excitement following a glut of posters and bonus DVD documentaries, will an entire generation of Beatles fans has critical undoing. While, without a doubt, the bad press for both men, but, in an effort to sway sales away from online digital music grown up listening to what many critics music deserves to be presented in its fullest compliment the excess of Beatles brand retailers like Amazon and iTunes. Some have asserted are subpar versions of some and most vibrant potential, the barrage of merchandise that began appearing in stores stores have even offered trade-in deals on of the Fab Four's seminal discography. hype that pre-empted the 09/09/09 release last spring, the group even coordinated old Beatles CDs. That said, enjoy-40 years Indeed, as anyone who listened to the date has produced a number of sneers that the release to coincide with their very first since disbanding, the Beatles have never group's 2006 experimental Love remix the new reissues are merely a cash grab, video game, The Beatles: Rock Band. sounded so good. album can attest to, the audio on those old particularly since many Beatles fans and Even the date was strategically chosen The Beatles Box Set is available now Beatles CDs sounds flat and dated compared collectors already own very comprehensive to coincide with John Lennon's famous and from Apple/EM!. to the infinite sonic possibilities and musical collections of the group's music. It isn't mythologized karmic fascination with the potential of the digital era. Mter four years uncommon to find Fab Four fans who not number nine-bucking the normal industry of dedicated work though, it looks as though Sir Paul McCartney and company may have finally realized the music's digital potential. Each cut on each disc is beautifully cleaned up as the dense and carefully layered details of the music are subtly realized for the first time in over twenty years. Hearing these remasters isn't like listening to a replica of the old recordings, like the 1987 set attempted to do, but rather like experiencing the quality of audio that you would expect from a top grossing contemporary act releasing a new album. The remaining Beatles have taken the time to go through each track and not only enhance the audio-bringing up the bass on the drums, the treble on guitars or spreading out the sound for a more full, room filling experience-but they've also taken time to correct some of the band's notorious flubs. Gone, some critics complain, are some of the technical flaws, like Ringo's famous drum stool squeak midway through "A Day in the Life," that gave the records a distinct flavour-although most listeners who never noted such imperfections will be awed by the new vibrancy brought to their old favourites. Then there's the old packaging, which, predating the now industry vogue digipaks, seems big and bulky in those ugly plastic jewel cases. The sleek packaging for the new fourteen reissued discs is almost like a mini-version of the old gatefold record sleeves-an effort to imbue them with a timeless quality capable of transgressing the disposability attached to so much music in a twenty-first century cultural landscape obsessed with free content. Branding, the buzzword-du-jour for the savvy businessperson, has in recent years never been far from Sir Paul's mind. Through the new digipak packaging, he hopes to once again align the group and their music with pertinent social issues - this time climate change. And like a number of his fellow '60s classic rock alumni-everyone from Bob Dylan (who began experimenting with special edition digipak packaging for the 2003 reissues of Highway 61 Revisited and Blonde on Blonde), to CCR and Leonard Cohen, who both reissued comprehensive back catalogues last year-the Beatles have recognized the potential to use new and creative packaging as a medium to both 12 • 4 ••• Oprah Winfrey: saviour of the arts Talk show giant to start music club

Thursday September 17: Pacific Coliseum is host to mainstream metal giants Killswitch Engage, In Flames and "finally legal to drink" Protest the Hero. This is the second (and in one case, third) time that these groups have come through Vancouver this year, so taking a night to study might not be the worst thing in the world.

Friday September 18: Los Furious is skanking up Pub 340 with the Wrecktals and The Bone Daddys this Friday. Get your groove on to the sweet dub beats and have a brew or two while you're at it. Music starts at 10 and the cover charge is the same.

Saturday September 19: The Railway Club is host to rock group The Bends in "The Bends tribute to Radiohead" this Saturday. Back in '95, Radiohead played the Railway Club and turned it into an outright bar fight, so be sure to bring riot gear.

Sunday September 20: Arctic Monkeys play Stanley Park's Malkin bowl with supporting acts The Like. This is an all-ages show for the kids with doors at 5 p.m. The park ranger mentioned that the show must be over by dark so that the Monkeys can get back into their cages in time for dinner at the aquarium.

By Jay Schreiber, Arts Editor So what does Oprah listen to, then? Whitney Houston Dear faithful readers of The OP, and Tina Turner are going to As the arts editor, I have be regulars, that's for sure. been unkind towards key Man-divas such as Sting, Elvis figures of major media and their Costello and Elton John would outlandish antics in this thing probably be on the show fairly we call pop culture. The truth, often if I have any idea how Blind Spot however, is that I do not despise Oprah thinks. By Laura Bourne all media attention whores, but What if Slayer found rather only the ones who deserve themselves in a 10 minutes it. spot focusing on the roots of The people hustle In the small but elite club American heavy metal and down the street towards of positive media giants, one promoting their final tour? nothing but office buildings individual begins to stand out as Would soccer morns buy that? They don't see the Queen Bee: Oprah Wlllfrey. Ask yourself, could you imagine that an old oak tree, knots Oprah has always contributed anyone over 40 making a special of gnarled wood, a structure to those in need whenever she trip to go out and get the latest as fascinated as Eiffel Tower, can, and unlike attention whores CD from such bands as Cannibal has been taken down, who dispose of money for their Corpse? replaced own personal amusement, Oprah Would Oprah be inclusive? disposes it for others. Would she have opera singers, with a parking meter. Oprah usually gives away gangsta rappers and concert The people see two inches everything from blenders to cars, violinists from the Chicago in front of their squinting, dulling eyes and her book club has turned an Philharmonic? How about the Armed with briefcases and coffee entire generation of middle-aged, latest electro DJ from Diisseldorf they are missing out. stay-at-home morns into educated coming on to talk about his latest They don't feel readers. Hell, I'd even go so far techno jive or his addiction to the absence of the man as to say that she would make blow? who usually asks for a good first female president I highly doubt that Oprah's their change. focused on peace, communication club will include any of the and most importantly, literacy in previously mentioned, and her His abandoned faded blue the United States. favourite picks will probably sleeping bag and his wom out Recently, Oprah announced all be within the same style of backpack, his Styrofoam cup that she will continue her venture music. I don't imagine that Oprah filled with pennies, lie to culture the U.S. by starting will get any more experimental lonely on the sidewalk. a music club. This club would than is expected of her. Never The old bookstore on the corner feature a musical guest, promote the less, the point still stands is gone, replaced by a Oprah's picks of music, and that Oprah is trying to do a good sign "Retail convince day time television thing, whether it turns out that Opportunity." watchers to shut their eyes and way or not. focus on their ears. The uglv under ell ol the automotive trade

Why one should be encouraged to carefully consider their decision to become an auto technician. By Will Stearn rate charged for automotive work) a ratchet for hours, lift weights of over 400 pounds ear protection off and strain to hear minute cost one day's wages. Now at 24 per cent above your head, and Houdini yourself squeaks, rattles, and leaks, get your gloves ost talented technicians have of the door rate, a ratchet costs three days' under a dash, arms twisted above you, cut open, filled with sweat, and snagged the equivalent of four years wages and is one of the very least expensive flashlight in mouth, brake pedal digging into by sharp objects several times a day. Your M university within 10 years, are tools needed, as opposed to back in 1960 neck, hips dangling over the dooljamb for respirator will be drenched in sweat not to overseen by ignorant superiors who in the when it was one of the most expensive hours as you repair some obscure wire or mention impossible to wear during many vast majority of cases have a dogwood tools. One preposterous argument for this squeak while water drips on your forehead close quarter tasks. Inadvertent spills will diploma and no automotive experience, and gap is the rising cost of shop equipment. and slush soaks your back. go right through your fancy uniform strait to get treated like uneducated slaves whose Shop equipment costs have risen due to Danger of eye and ear damage your receptive skin and the whole shop will jobs are readily filled by the wash boy. increased complexity and natural inflation, from sharp projectiles and toxic fluids is in no way "stop" while you search for your Techs are made out to be the source of (of which the owner can write off) but more ever present, along with blunt trauma to mystery noise. Most shops will also make "rip offs" due to the utter lack of automotive and more "shop tools" have been designated head, chest, etc. Every year one to three you pay for this equipment (this is illegal knowledge, communication skills and the responsibility of the technician. And technicians in Canada are killed by hoist as per WCB) or they will purchase the most schedule organization by management and unless you are in your first few years of failure due to lack of maintenance. This is inadequate, cheaply priced trash forcing you advisors. You will be asked to compromise apprenticeship, the $30,000 worth of tools management's responsibility and is sadly to purchase working safety equipment out your licenses, integrity, and reputation or which you are required to purchase in order an industry standard. You may be required of pocket anyway. lose your job. People know when they' re to perform at a similar level with other to do your own hoist inspections but this is Go to any doctor or chiropractor's being ripped off and 99 per cent of the time successful technicians cannot be written off illegal and any requests for needed repairs office and ask him what profession he or it's not because of the technician. like all other trades or arts. may go unanswered indefinitely. she sees most often in their office. Without There are so few shops where a Pay does not commensurate with You will go deaf in certain tone hesitation you will hear that it is the lowly "How can we solve this" or a "Let's knowledge or skill. Contrary to expectation, frequencies. Alarms going off, air tools, mechanic. work together" attitude exists, even for a no matter how many extra licenses you or your neighbour dropping a brake drum, Advancement! If you want a job moment, that I dare say they are as real as attain (i.e. Government Vehicle Inspection, the abuse never ends. Those fancy air tools with no physical or diagnostic demands leprechauns. You will need to cover your Air Care, First Aid etc, at your own we love so much that make our job easier but all the joys of a middle management behind 2417 because the odd human mistake expense), you will probably never get any and faster eventually cause carpal tunnel gang banging, and the customer service you make, however rare, will be pounced remuneration for it. General repair shops syndrome as well. experience of taking complaints for the IRS upon as others relish in making you pay for (where you must learn the intricacies By far the largest and most common you can work your way to the prestigious it. Everyone hates their job, they can't get of several brands and possess superior danger to your health is the chemicals. service manager job! Take a short night out themselves and getting someone else diagnostic skills with little official technical Almost every sprayable agent in the course, a hefty pay cut, and become a fired makes them feel more secure about information) pay slightly less, and come automotive world contains a "T' chemical, service advisor. Play the lottery for several their own position as well as give them a with fewer benefits than at a dealership. a chemical that causes "life-threatening years searching the classifieds for a position tiny bit of underlying hope that someone Knowing more equals more diagnostics and serious long-term health problems." you don't really want but won't realize will return the favour. equals less money. It never leaves your body! It accumulates until it's too late. Your only real hope is to The customer arrives angry that their Please don't believe the delusion eventually causing anything from become a shop foreman but you have to car is broken, they leave angry having paid that you will be paid more working at a neurological disorders to organ failure. be the best, most senior, and most popular to get it fixed (or not fixed) . I've never seen Mercedes Benz, or at a BMW dealer (where Getting transmission fluid on your skin or technician that can be buddies with the a more thankless avenue of employment. you will be expected to attain a level of in your lungs carries with it the side effects service manager and lie to the technicians Your interactions with almost everyone perfection akin to a god and deal with of major skin or lung cancer. Similar effects while keeping their support. you meet at work contain differing levels customers the likes described only in Steven are caused by brake fluid and coolant. There Consider your choices carefully. of anger, distrust, disappointment, loathing, King novels). You will make more per hour are many more chemicals for you to find in Timing gear systems resembling the guts of or sadness. No exaggeration. You will go and bonuses at Honda or Toyota as opposed the WHMIS book at your local garage (It is a watch, 167 computers in a single vehicle, your entire career without hearing anything to being expected to work for the "prestige" required by law for the shop to have such mid-harness diodes, and fibre optics don't positive about yourself, your job or how of it at Audi or Jaguar. It may be impressive a book and all its employees to be familiar even scrape the surface of what you'll you efficiently diagnosed and repaired over at a party when someone finds out you work with it, but don't be surprised if they can't be intimate with. Even these challenges 250,000 cars. Surviving in this environment for a high end luxury auto dealer but not so find it). subside in their lustrous appeal and your for any length of time with no ill effect to much when you drive away in your 1990 Wearing gloves, a respirator and ear working day will be filled with the pains of your home life isn't possible. VWGolf. protection would be good but you will not an ever advancing industry that has sadly A study done by the Snap-On tool In this job your back will take a be able to attain your required efficiency forgotten its labouring masses. company states that in 1960 (when the tech beating like in no other. You will be asked level like this, and you'll be fired. Not to was paid half the "door rate," the hourly to bend over at ninety degrees, knees locked mention the fact that you have to take your

15 How do you feel about the new semester so far? Any concerns? sy Rosa Hong

lnder Gaodham Lucas Ryan Mariano Nursing General Studies Nursing

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I George Barretto and Celeste St. Peter, Hotel and Restaurant Management students, promote their student plan.

Students discuss philosophy at David Lam's Cafeteria. Criminology student Natacle Kunkln checks out some career options. 16

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By Garth Mclennan, Sports Editor as the newest Olympic hero. to, understandably, believe that chemistry say that he's on some new fangled designer However, whatever he accomplished may be behind Bolt's success. drug that can't be picked up though current very once in a while an athlete last summer, he made everyone forget about After all, if there has ever been a sport testing, but if you go by that method, you comes along with the ability to truly it with his breathtaking performance at this so widely publicized for its doping scandals, could say the same thing about any athlete, Erevolutionize and rewrite the record year's World Athletics Championships in track and field has to be at or near the top of in any sport, who breaks records and wins books for his or her sport. For hockey it was Berlin. Bolt competed in the same three the list. With a few rare exceptions, running championships. Wayne Gretzky; for golf it is Tiger Woods; events and took gold in all of them. It was has time and time again seen the rise of The fact is, Bolt is built to be a basketball had Michael Jordan, and by all in the lOOm dash however, that he truly track superstars, only to see them crash and sprinter. At 6-5 in a sport usually dominated accounts, tra£k and field appears to have made history. burn in a blaze of disgrace. Ben .Johnson, by much shorter men, Bolt is naturally · · found their transcendent superstar-Usain Bolt shattered his previous mark of Carl Lewis, Tun Montgomery, Marian Jones predisposed to succeed. Tuners from Berlin Bolt, the fastest man alive. 9.69 seconds by running the lOOm in 958. and Justin Gatlin are the most prominent broke down his runs in the lOOm dash and Since exploding onto the scene at last That sort of improvement is unheard of, among them. found that over the course of the meet Bolt year's Summer Olympics in Beijing, the and it has fuelled his critics' claims that These frequent and repeated examples took far fewer individual steps than his Jamaican-born Bolt has completely blown he can't possibly be running clean. Before of cheating have tainted the sport, and it's closest competitor, Tyson Gay. To go along away the athletics world, and made the Bolt, whenever the lOOm world record fell, now almost impossible for any successful with his incredible speed, he covers much casual sports fan sit up and take notice of the most it had ever been broken by was track athlete to be great and escape doping more ground with each step he takes then track and field, which is unheard of outside more than 0.07 seconds. Bolt broke his own suspicions. Bolt, unique in so many ways, is everyone else. of the Olympics and steroid scandals. record by 0.11 seconds. no exception to that. More than anything else, though, Like Gretzky, Woods and Jordan, Bolt has Bolt is so fast that he's been blowing From all evidence however, I don't I want to believe that Bolt is clean. The become larger than the sport, and after the away the times of known steroid cheats, think that Usain Bolt is doping. Sure, he pure fun and joy of sports is ruined if you last year he's had, it's easy to see why. such as Ben Johnson and Tim Montgomery. may be the fastest man of all time, but so always cast athletes in a shadow of doubt. At the Olympics in China, Bolt racked The fact that he's only 23, and still several far, there is zero evidence to suggest that That doesn't mean that fans should be na1ve up three gold medals and blew away the years away from the typical prime of a he's a cheat, other than the sport's overall and blindly believe whatever they're told; world records in the 4 x lOOm relay, the sprinter, makes Bolt's speed seem even past. He is one of the most tested athletes on it just means that until some semblance 200m and most importantly, the Cadillac of more inhuman. All of this, combined with the planet for performance enhancing drugs, of circumstantial or concrete evidence is sprinting, the lOOm. The sports world was his meteoric rise and unearthly level of and he's never failed a single test. Ever. provided, Usain Bolt should be given the stunned, and Bolt was immediately crowned improvement, has led a number of people Sure, there are those out there who would benefit of the doubt. 17 Canucks Gerner The Luongo deal is good for the Canucks

ove him or hate him, Roberto Luongo accepted as one of the three best on the planet, to resign Ryan Kesler, who is a UFA after this is here to stay. you can't ask for anything better. season, to a long-term contract. L That was the news out of Canucks The cap hit gets even sweeter when you Finally though, it's a measure of the GM Mike Gillis' office when he announced compare it to what other players are making. type of team that is beginning to formulate that the superstar goalie had agreed to play Both the Sedin twins cap numbers are higher in Vancouver. Luongo has had some less­ basically the rest of his career in Vancouver and when matched up with other goaltenders than-stellar moments during his tenure with by signing a mammoth 12-year, $64 million around the league, Luongo's cap hit checks in the Canucks but this was a classy move by contract that runs through 2022-23 and will at eighth in the NHL. When you've locked in a a player who has clearly set winning as his see him remain in a Vancouver jersey until player like Luongo for less than what Nicklas number one priority. When you also consider he is 43 years old, assuming he doesn't retire Backstrom, J.S. Gigure and Cristobal Huet are that Alex Burrows left millions on the table before the life of the deal is concluded. making, you know you're in good shape. to re-sign here for the next four years and that Luongo, 30, has one year remaining on The best part about this deal though is the Sedins are committed for the foreseeable his current pact with the team that will pay the relief factor. After tumultuous previous future, the Canucks now have an undisputed him $7.5 million for the upcoming season, so two seasons, filled with hints and comments core for the first time in years. That is the the new deal won't kick in until 2010-11. Long from Luongo questioning his future with the secret to success that the Detroit Red Wings term, front loaded contracts have become the Canucks, it's an unquestionable weight-off­ have been adhering to for years now; convince trend of late, anq Luongo's deal is no different. the-shoulders moment for the team and its your key players to sign for less in the hopes He will make $10 million next season but the fans. On the open market a goalie like Luongo of winning a Stanley Cup and attracting other annual salary cap hit over the course of the could command virtually whatever he wanted, big name stars. contract is just $5.333 million. so to get him for what we did is a relative The only piece left to sign on for the long Now, I've made no secret that I am far steal. haul is Kesler, who was Vancouver's team from a Luongo fan, but any logical person had This means that Vancouver's highest paid MVP last season, but from everything he's to admit that $5.333 million is a ridiculously player now makes $6.1 million against the cap, said over the past few months he seems keen low number for a player of Luongo's calibre. which is a very comfortable number to work to accept less for the good of the team. For a Vezina Trophy finalist, the potential with. In the future, this gives Gillis room to Finally, things are really looking up for starter for Team Canada at the 2010 Olympics go out and acquire that star player who can the Vancouver Canucks. and beyond and a goaltender that is widely put the club over the top. It allows the team

18 State of the Royals Coach Gert Van Niekerk on athletics at Douglas, SFU and beyond

By Garth Mclennan, Sports Editor year. It's called the NWAACC [Northwest of two minds. As you might expect, when it comes to Athletic Association of Community "I have sort of mixed feelings on it. the 2010 Olympics, Van Niekerk is a huge here are few people at Douglas Colleges] down there. She was the only I guess it makes sense financially, but we supporter of the Games, and thinks that the College more knowledgeable about women's golf player Douglas had; we didn't have a pretty good league here in the CIS benefits of the whole deal far outweigh the T B.C. sports than Gert Van Niekerk. really have a team. We will this year for [Canadian Interuniversity Sports] and negatives. Van Niekerk is the coordinator for the sports sure though." they're pretty competitive. Now SFU is ''I'm a huge Olympic fan. I know that science program at Douglas and has been Douglas plays out of the NWAACC for just jumping to the NCAA. It could be for they come with a lot of criticism because with the College in various capacities for both men's and women's golf and competes • financial reasons or for a better calibre of of the cost, but so did Expo, and that paid almost 40 years. with nine other schools. play, but the level of competition in CIS off big time forB .C.," he said. " In the long In a wide-ranging discussion about For most sports at Douglas though, Van isn't bad. I think that they should support run I think it'll be a good thing for the the current state of athletics at Douglas Niekerk has high hopes. "Douglas is going the local product." province and it will promote sport. There and the rest of B.C., Van Niekerk shared to have a full compliment of teams again in "I guess that when you think of will be a lot of long-term benefits. You're his thoughts and predictions, starting off the BCCAA. They're going to have strong the NCAA, you think of big crowds, left with a great legacy and the eyes of with excitement about the prospects of the men's and women's soccer teams. Men's cheerleaders, big money. So my question the world are on B.C., which is obviously upcoming season for the men's golf team, basketball will be strong again like last year is, will the NCAA level of PR translate up great for tourism. You get a lot of great of which he is the head coach. [when Douglas had a perfect record and here like it does in the U.S.? It might be in long-term infrastructure.l'm a fan. I think "The men's golf team will do much won the national championship], I don't bigger crowds, so there's that to consider. that VANOC are being very accountable better this summer," he said. "You know, know what the women's basketball will be Obviously with NCAA tier 1 teams it would for the money they spend, they're being up last year, things didn't go good. We started like, they've been struggling a bit over the be a huge draw for crowds, so maybe that's front. There haven't been too many hidden off with lots of promise, but at Christmas last few years. Badminton is very strong, what they 're thinking long term. But right agendas." we had three of our players deemed they're perennial champions. I mean, all of now they're tier 2," he said. "Now that I From the looks of things 2009-lO ineligible to play, and that really did our our badminton teams just dominate. The think of it, I suppose the TV revenues are a should be an exciting year for a great sports team in." men's and women's wrestling is always big part of it. I mean, CIS doesn't get that program at Douglas. It's a good thing On the women's side of golf for good. Last year they produced a national much coverage. But say, Oregon State or that they have one of the most dedicated, Douglas, Van Niekerk is also upbeat. collegiate champion." someon~ like that comes up here from the professional coaches in the business to help "Michaela Staller, she made the all-star When the talk turns to SFU's recent NCAA to play SFU, people are going to them along the way. team when we played down in the states last acceptance into the NCAA, Van Niekerk is watch that."

You've got to feel for Dan Cloutier

By Garth Mclennan, Sports Editor It was an incredibly steep decline for a guy who once set the Vancouver Canucks' efore Roberto Luongo came to town, single season shutout record. 31 years old Vancouver was well known as a and not a team in the NHL would give him B goalie graveyard. Many goaltenders a job. over the years had come here at various However, it looks like Cloutier is stages of their careers and the vast majority about to get his second chance (or third, of them had left in obscurity to some minor depending on how you look at it). The league team or with their confidence shot. No dynastic Detroit Red Wings have invited one exemplified this more than Dan Cloutier, the 33-year-old Mont-Laurier, Quebec who fulfilled both of the above scenarios. native to their training camp to compete Cloutier carved out a place for himself with Jimmy Howard for the team's backup with the Canucks, stringing together several goaltender spot. superb regular seasons while posting There are no promises that this will solid numbers as the club's first legitimate go anywhere for Cloutier, but right now it starter since the departure of Kirk McLean. must feel like a godsend. After a Stanley However, one thing Cloutier was never able Cup win two seasons ago and another to do was attain any sort of playoff success. appearance in the finals this June, Chris Nothing put the exclamation point on this Osgood is firmly entrenched as Detroit's more than his disastrous 2002 first round starter. But if there is one identifiable series against the Detroit Red Wings, where hole on the Red Wings' roster it is in net. Nicklas Lidstrom fired a now infamous laser Osgood has his doubters and has struggled from center ice in game three. Vancouver over the years to establish himself as a true, went on to lose the series. undisputed number one with several teams, The next year was even worse. After despite his winning pedigree. getting by the St. Louis Blues in seven Howard has been hailed as a blue games, the Canucks advanced to play the chip prospect for years now but he's still upstart Minnesota Wild, who ventilated toiling away in the minors. He's been Cloutier for 15 goals over the final three dubbed the next big thing in Detroit every games of the series. The year after that, summer, with huge expectations heading against the Calgary Flames in the first into training camp, but that's been going on round, Cloutier injured his ankle and for over half a decade now and there still couldn't complete the series, which ended hasn't been anything to validate the hype. Vancouver's season. So Cloutier has a shot. Maybe not By this time most Canucks' fans had a great one, but a shot nonetheless. If he already deemed Cloutier another victim of is able to shake off the inevitable rust the city's goalie graveyard. Sure enough, that comes with not playing for an entire missed the post-season. saves percentage plummeted to a truly awful the next year Cloutier suited up for just 13 season and win the back up job, anything After that debacle, Cloutier was traded .860 and he fell to several more lengthy games before suffering a season-ending ACL can happen. Who knows, he might even be to Los Angeles while Luongo was brought injuries before being waived and sent to the injury. He was replaced by Alex Auld, whose able to get in a few games next season. No in. During his two seasons in Hollywood, AHL. tombstone in Vancouver's goalie graveyard matter bow this situation pans out though, to say that he played terribly would be Cloutier played just nine games in sits right beside Cloutier's, and the Canucks you have to pull for the guy. charitable. His GAA ballooned to 3.98, his 2007-08 and was out of hockey last year. 19 Write a feature, make 50 bucks!

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