The Life and Art of Pablo Picasso

From Obsession to Betrayal: The Life and Art of Pablo Picasso “I have had no true friends, only lovers” Pablo Picasso MARIE WILSON Art Therapy Program, Caldwell College, Caldwell, New Jersey, USA

With the exception of his physical size, everything about Pablo Picasso was larger than life. He was one of the richest and most productive and prolific artists that ever lived. Picasso’s artwork, long recognized for its sensual and erotic content, became the single most revealing indicator of his ardent emotional and sexual life. So too, Picasso’s personal life became defined by passionate intrigue, infidelity and melodrama. This paper will review the nature of Picasso’s most intimate personal relationships through the portraits and stories of eight important women in his life; two wives, five mistresses and one granddaughter. Psychological theories familiar to sex addiction professionals will be considered as a means for understanding the connections between Picasso’s childhood and the patterns of sexual excess and relationship dysfunction evidenced in his adult relationships.

The artwork of Pablo Picasso has captivated us for almost a century. Arguably the most famous artist of our era, Picasso’s innovative styles and proliﬁc con- tributions earned him his megastar status. Picasso’s work surfaced during the period in history when a large shift in perception of human consciousness arose with the introduction of modern psychological thought. In the early 1900’s Freud and psychoanalysis were becoming the rage in Europe. This shift in perception, in addition to the invention of photography, enabled Picasso to respond to his artistic subjects from a very personal perspective. Liberated from the constraints of the more formal aspects of painting from realism, Picasso transformed his work from an objective document into a sub- jective one (Rubin, 1996). His portraits of both himself and others proclaimed his affections, conﬂicts and complexities. Picasso used his portrayals to let others—and himself—know that his feelings were intensifying or diminish- ing. Richardson (1991) reports hearing Picasso lament proudly how painful

Address correspondence to Marie Wilson, MA, ATR-BC, LPC, Coordinator and Associate Professor of Art Therapy, Caldwell College, Caldwell, NJ 07006. E-mail: [email protected]

163 164 M. Wilson it must be for his women to watch themselves transformed into a monster on canvas or fade from his work entirely while being replaced his new favorite “in all her glory” (p. 3). His painted, drawn and sculpted portraits became the single most revealing and direct barometer of his ardent emotional and sexual life. Picasso’s portraiture reaches its summits of intensity and sensuality in his depictions of women (Sims, 1996). Of her grandfather’s work, Marina Picasso would say, that Picasso was indifferent to everything outside his painting and that his art was the only thing that mattered to him. In order to create, he had to destroy everything that got in the way of his creation and he never had time to think about the fate of those closest to him. Creativity, like sexuality, is part of a full encounter with life and Picasso’s life became defined by his work and his sexual relationships. Never an advocate for fidelity, Picasso rarely broke off relationships completely and enjoyed the melodrama, and chaos of passionate intrigue (Gardner, 1993). According to many first person accounts, Picasso was destructive to the women in his life, his children and grand- children (Olivier, 2001; Picasso, 2002; O’Brian, 1976; Gilot & Lake, 1975; Crespelle, 1967). Beautiful women under his influence became transformed through both physical and emotional abuse. Picasso exhibited little respect for women and loved them with a sort of cruelty (O’Brian, 1976), yet these love relationships gave his work its indelibly human and sensual character. Jaime Sabartes, his loyal friend of sixty-five years (cited in Crespelle, 1967), is quoted as saying,

Never did his creative power manifest itself so strongly as during the parox- ysm of his amorous experiences. You have only to note the dates of his works: they always coincide with periods of amorous exaltation ... With each new amorous experience we see his art progressing, a new form appearing, another language, a particular method of expression to which you could give a woman’s name. (p. 10)

Picasso’s unique combination of creativity, charisma, and power have attracted the attention of popular journalists such as Norman Mailer (1996), serious scholars and well-known psychotherapists including Carl Jung (1966). Alice Miller (1990) and Howard Gardner (1993) have both written about the possible source of Picasso’s creative energy, but do not specifically address his persistent relationship struggles. Mary Mathews Gedo (1980), however, skillfully combines psychoanalytic theory, her own research as an art histo- rian and Picasso’s own autobiographical documentation to create a substantial retrospective of his life, art and his stormy relationships. It is not the intent of this author to assert a formal diagnosis since it would be unfair to do so based on the accounts of others without actually interviewing Picasso himself. The details of problematic sexual behavior, romantic intrigue and relationship dysfunction, however, are familiar to all of From Obsession to Betrayal 165 us and readers are left to draw their own conclusions. Psychological theories familiar to sex addiction professionals will be considered as a means for understanding the connections between Picasso’s childhood and the patterns of sexual excess and emotional abuse evidenced in his adult relationships. The discussion of Picasso’s intimate relationships begins with a discussion of his life, specifically his childhood. This is followed by the stories, some of which are autobiographies, written about or by eight important women in his life; two wives, five mistresses and one granddaughter as well as other bio- graphical accounts by individuals well-known to Picasso. Selected examples of Picasso’s artwork are offered to further illustrate important points.

PABLO PICASSO: THE EARLY YEARS

Born on October 25, 1881 in Malaga, Spain, young Picasso spent his childhood surrounded by five women; his over-protective mother, grandmother, two unmarried, subservient aunts and a nurse. All five women adored him, spoiled him and catered to his every need (O’Brian, 1976). His mother Maria, who loved Picasso “above all else” (Miller, 1990, p. 6) ruled over her intro- verted, depressed husband and by most accounts, totally absorbed her son (Kavanaugh, 1995). Fifty years later, Picasso’s mother would describe her son as “an angel, and a devil for beauty. You couldn’t take your eyes off him” (Crespelle, 1967). Picasso’s father, Don Jose, taught drawing which allowed him to make enough money to get by, but never gained him any stature or notoriety as an artist. A bachelor until his forties, Don Jose was urged to marry by his family who arranged a suitable match with his cousin Maria, twenty years his junior, for whom Don Jose felt little enthusiasm. In gaining a wife, Don Jose also gained Maria’s two unmarried sisters and mother, who all moved into the newly married couple’s small apartment in Malaga. As was the custom at the time both unmarried sisters became the financial responsibility of Don Jose, who struggled to support a wife, her two sisters, a mother-in-law and, eventually, three children. Don Jose, who already had a tendency towards depression and being the only man in a household of women, retreated to the solace of his studio located in another part of town. He became progressively more withdrawn and emotionally unavailable (O’Brian, 1976). Maria clearly ruled over her son and the household in those early years. There is little evidence of any relationship between young Pablo and his father until the boy grew older. Picasso credits his father with introducing him to paints and canvas at around age six and later, at age ten, when the family moved to Barcelona, providing studio space for the young artist. When, at age twenty, Picasso decided to leave Spain for the art-centered world of Paris, his father provided the financial support that made this possible (O’Brian, 1976). Richardson (1991) suggests that Picasso’s early experiences were in keeping 166 M. Wilson with typical childrearing practices for that time within Spanish culture. Young sons were usually separated from adult male kinship and monopolized by women who dominated all aspects of child-rearing and socialization. Young Pablo’s life changed abruptly with the arrival of his younger sister, Lola, whose delivery coincided with a massive earthquake that rocked Malaga for three days. The family was forced to flee their home and Maria gave birth with her husband and young son looking on. The trauma of the earthquake and Pablo’s witnessing of his sister’s birth were further complicated by his mother’s now divided attention between her two children. However, young Pablo’s behavior did not undergo any dramatic changes until he was forced to attend the first grade. There are many accounts of Picasso’s rebelliousness at school (Gilot & Lake; 1964; O’Brian, 1976; Miller, 1990; Picasso, 2002) and the fantastic and doting stories told by both his mother and grandmother of those early years were suddenly succeeded by the tedium of the alpha- bet (Crespelle, 1967). He had tantrums when left alone at school and often feigned illness in order to remain at home. Gedo (1980) states that young Picasso would become quite disorganized whenever he had to separate from his family. She believes that this disorganization would surface repeatedly throughout his adult life whenever a crucial relationship ended or was inter- rupted by external events and he found himself alone. Desperate to please him and anxious to end the tantrums, his father removed him from the public village school and sent him to private school despite the financial hardships on his already struggling family. At the private school, young Picasso was allowed to take along a pigeon which had served as a drawing model for his father. With the birdcage in front of him he was allowed to sketch rather than follow along with the rest of the class, engendering at an early age, the feeling of being special and not accountable like the other children. When he was tired of drawing, he got up to go to the window to waive at all the passers-bys, or else he went off to the kitchen to find the headmaster’s wife with whom he had fallen in love (Crespelle, 1967). Alice Miller (1991), suggests that the monotonous routine of school could not meet the needs of a genius like Picasso and suggests that his inability to learn was linked to the earlier trauma of the earthquake in Malaga and furthered by the witnessing of the birth (1991). Kavanaugh (1995), suggests that his inability to read, deal with rules or adhere to any type of structure is consistent with dyslexia and attention deficit disorder. Gedo (1980) says that Picasso’s behavior was a result of both his extreme school phobia and a severe learning block. In any case, unable or unwilling to learn, Picasso was passed along year by year until at age 16, he left school. As an adult, Picasso was openly disdainful of a formal approach to education claiming that although he could barely read and write, he was both rich and successful (Picasso, 2002). When the town of Malaga closed its museum, Don Jose, who was working as the museum’s curator, lost his job. This resulted in the family moving From Obsession to Betrayal 167 to Corunna where Don Jose took a job as a drawing teacher for less money. Corunna, located on the Altantic coast of Spain and known for its mists and rain would prove to be a difficult transition for the family. Shortly after the move to Corunna, Conchita, Don Jose’s youngest and favorite child died of diphtheria. From that moment on Don Jose was a “wreck of a man” (Crespelle, 1967, p. 16). He became disillusioned and bitter, spiraling down into the depths of depression. When Picasso finally moved to Paris at age 20, he took his best friend, Casegemus with him for companionship and support. Casegemus, became involved with a Parisian prostitute and shot her and himself in a quarrel. The prostitute lived, however, Casegemus died of his self inflicted injuries (Kavanaugh, 1995; O’Brian, 1975). Overcome with grief and haunted by the aloneness he encountered for the first time in his life, Picasso would begin to paint the despairing characters of what came to be known as his “Blue Period” (Crespelle, 1967). Picasso retained bittersweet memories of his childhood and would continue to return to Spain during the summers for most of his adult life. He would cultivate a love for bullfighting and Spanish culture. Throughout his life he kept a picture in his studio of a bullfight that he painted at the age of eight (Crespelle, 1967). Picasso preferred to describe his childhood in idyllic terms, picturing himself as the young prodigy whose unusual promise was quickly comprehended by his perceptive mother. Many years later, however, Francoise Gilot would describe Picasso’s mother as a tyrannical woman who dominated the family so completely that Picasso was forced to flee Spain in order to escape her control over him (Gedo, 1980). Richardson (1996) says that Picasso remembered his mother with fondness and a touch of shame for her dumpy, housewifely appearance. When his mother died, Picasso became quite inconsolable and isolated himself for many months (O’Brian, 1976). Gardner (1993) believes that Picasso harbored strong, ambivalent feelings about his father throughout his life. On one hand, he loved him and was very dependent on him, while on the other hand, he saw his father as weak and compromising. When his father became very ill, Picasso rushed to the deathbed of the father that he both loved and hated; the father whose in- ept teaching had unleashed Picasso’s passion for drawing and whose failure had generated so much of his power (Richardson, 1996). However, when his father died, Picasso did not attend his funeral (O’Brian, 1976).

THE WOMEN IN PICASSO’S LIFE Fernande: Picasso’s First Love Fernande Olivier, a redhead with large green eyes, was Picasso’s first great love. In 1904, when their affair began, both she and Picasso were involved with other people. In love at first sight, Picasso pressured Fernande to come 168 M. Wilson live with him and although she would spend days and weeks with him, waited for one year before she agreed to move into his apartment in Paris (O’Brian, 1976). Fernande kept a journal for much of the time she spent with Picasso and thanks to her memoirs we are able to know, in wonderful and informative detail, about her life with Picasso (Olivier, 2001). Even during the first, passionate year of their relationship, Picasso continued to see other women (Kavanaugh, 1995). Fernande was with Picasso during these early years, which later became known as the Rose Period and early Cubism. Fernande’s memoirs describe the ardor of the young Picasso, who built a shrine to her in his studio and who insisted on her presence at all times with him while he was working, many times all night. Insanely jealous, he guarded their relationship fiercely, even to the extent of locking her up when he went out. In addition to his consuming love, her memoirs also reveal his dark side, mood swings and brutality often directed against her, which eventually led to their break-up in 1912 (Olivier, 2001). During this period, Picasso depicts himself in self-portraits as young, bold and attractive, his head often drawn in large proportion to the page, pushing the very edges of the canvas or paper and declaring himself larger than life (Figure 1). In a later painting (Figure 2), Picasso depicts himself as a manual laborer, emphasizing the bulkiness and strength of his upper torso, made strong by his work (Kaufman & Wilson, 2003). Fernande would describe Picasso as a workaholic, an impulsive buyer, and a jealous lover. Despite the bittersweet memories of the years she spent with Picasso, Fernande regretted ever leaving him and she would continue to play an important role in Picasso’s life for many years. Not until 1930s did Fernande finally end their relationship when she published the first of her memoirs, much to the dismay of Picasso, who, feeling betrayed and angry, refused to see her any more. Fernande was never able to recover from Picasso’s rejection, and became one of the many women whose lives were forever damaged by their relationship with him.

Eva: A Young Death At the end of her relationship with Picasso, Fernande began an affair with one of Picasso’s colleagues, mostly for revenge (Richardson, 1996). Since she was still living with Picasso, Fernande asked her friend, Marcelle to help cover up her affair. Marcelle, who Picasso later renamed Eva, had ideas of her own and under the pretext of being a go-between for Fernande, began an affair with Picasso herself (Richardson, 1996). Several months later, both openly declared their love for each other. The couple seemed happy and were making plans to marry when Eva was hospitalized in 1915 with what was initially thought to be tuberculosis, but, in retrospect, was probably cancer (Richardson, 1996). Picasso, alone for the second time in his life, visited From Obsession to Betrayal 169

FIGURE 1. Self-Portrait, Barcelona, 1900. ©2004 Estate of Pablo Picasso/Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York her daily; at the same time, he began an affair with a beautiful 27 year old named Gaby Lespinasse. Eva’s illness ended in her death. Richardson (1996) believes the death of Eva conﬁrmed Picasso to his hypochondria which surfaced repeatedly during his adult years and old age. Throughout his life, Picasso experienced enormous difﬁculty in dealing with death. He refused to speak about those who died, refused to attend funerals and feared anyone or anything that might bring about disease, advancing age or death (Gardner, 1993).

Olga: The Beautiful Ballerina Olga Koklova, a beautiful Russian ballerina became Picasso’s companion in 1917 and they were soon married. With Olga’s inﬂuence, Picasso would grow away from his former bohemian friends and travel in more bourgeois 170 M. Wilson

FIGURE 2. Self-Portrait with Palette, Paris, 1906. ©2004 Estate of Pablo Picasso/Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York circles. In 1931, when Picasso was 40, Olga bore him his ﬁrst child, a son named Paulo. It is reported that Picasso was not happy about the news and Olga’s growing self-absorption and demands for attention exasperated him. After the birth of Paulo, Picasso was no longer the center of attention and withdrew to his studio. This pattern repeated itself with other women and other pregnancies (Kavanaugh, 1995). Gedo (1980) believes that this behavior was connected to Picasso’s childhood trauma surrounding the earthquake in Malaga and the birth of his sister, Lola, as well as the perceived loss of his mother’s focused attention. This idea will be further discussed later in the paper. Marina Picasso, daughter of Paulo and granddaughter of Picasso would later write many accounts of her grandfather’s cruelty towards his son Paulo. “My grandfather, as a way of opposing my grandmother Olga, to whom he was no longer attracted, vengefully set her own son against her” (Picasso, From Obsession to Betrayal 171

2001, p. 14). Olga, strong willed and determined, was not one to sit back and take Picasso’s abuse or indifference towards her or her son. She was quite outspoken and soon much too demanding for Picasso who disliked the complications of relationships gone sour. In the late 1920s, Picasso began a series of paintings in which he represents himself as a shadowy proﬁle. Historians believe that his deteriorating relationship with Olga was likely the impetus for this series of paintings (Rubin, 1996). In these paintings, Picasso casts Olga out by depicting her as a deformed, shrieking, and animal-like monster while he looks on calmly. In the painting, we see him as a shadowy presence that is already leaving, already removing himself from the scene of emotional pain that his wife, who is being left for a younger woman (Marie Therese, whom we will meet soon), is feeling. While Picasso protects himself from the pain that he is responsible for creating by objectifying and turning Olga into a freakish creature with a large complaining mouth (Kaufman & Wilson, 2003).

Marie Therese: His Young Mistress Picasso’s fourth important female was Marie Therese Walter who was only 17 when they began their relationship. On the day she turned 18, Picasso took her to bed (O’Brian, 1976). Some sources report that Picasso actually began his relationship with Marie in 1925, when she was only ﬁfteen, indicating that there had been an illegal sexual relationship. Young and impressionable, Marie Therese was endlessly submissive in her tolerance of Picasso’s abuse and brutality. Picasso began this relationship while he was still married to and living with Olga. Since it was not in Picasso’s nature to sneak around in order to see other women, he rented an apartment for Marie Therese across the street from Olga’s home. Soon Marie Therese would have Picasso’s child. Of this time Marina Picasso would write, “. . . Marie Therese Walter, tired of being kept behind the scenes, had turned up on Olga’s doorstep to inform her that the baby in her arms was ‘the work of Picasso’...” (2001, p. 34). Picasso would continue to visit and ﬁnancially support Marie Therese and their out of wedlock child, Maya, for many years.

Dora: Picasso’s Equal According to some accounts, Dora Maar was the only woman who was re- ally Picasso’s intellectual equal (O’Brian, 1976). He began his relationship with Dora around the time of Maya’s birth while he was actively involved with Marie Therese and still married to and living with Olga. Dora, a pho- tographer and painter herself, was career minded, independent and spirited (Kavanaugh, 1995). These qualities, initially admired by Picasso, would soon cause friction between them. This friction led to physical ﬁghts and accounts 172 M. Wilson of Picasso beating Dora into unconsciousness (Kavanaugh, 1995). During this time, Picasso sought ways to turn up the heat, so to speak, with addi- tional melodrama in his life by intentionally creating tension between the four women he was still involved with, Dora, Marie Therese, Olga and Fernande. He orchestrated confrontations between these four women by revealing se- crets about one to another and inventing stories and gossip. Reportedly, he introduced Dora to Marie Therese by telling her that Marie Therese was the only woman he had ever loved. In a pair of portraits made from mem- ory on the same day in 1939 in his studio, Picasso positioned both lovers identically, underscoring the differences in his competing mistresses (Sims, 1996). Picasso would depict his relationships with both Dora and Marie Therese in his series of pictures of Minotaurs raping young defenseless females (Rubin, 1996). In this series of etchings and paintings, Picasso depicts himself as a minotaur, half man and half beast, in order to express the raw sexuality and contempt that he experienced in his relationships with both of these women (Figure 3). He is on top and in charge of the struggling, defenseless women. Both Dora and Marie Therese would remain very dependent on Picasso for the duration of their lives and submit, psychologically and sometimes physically, to his demanding brutality. After her breakup with Picasso, Dora spent a few years in an institution attempting to recover her

FIGURE 3. Pablo Picasso, Spanish, 1881–1973, The Embrace of the Minotaur, 1933, pen and black ink with brush and gray wash on blue wove paper, 48 × 62.8 cm, Gift of Tiffany and Margaret Blake, 1967. 516 Reproduction, The Art Institute of Chicago. From Obsession to Betrayal 173 mental health that she had so completely lost following the end of their relationship.

Francoise: Thirty Years His Junior Francoise Gilot was thirty years his junior when she and Picasso began their relationship in 1943. Picasso was already quite wealthy and very well known for both his artwork and his perverse lifestyle. Despite her family’s warnings about his complicated love life and their concern about the age differences between them, Francoise moved in with Picasso after a two year courtship. Francoise was well educated and tall, with an androgynous beauty and intensely rational mind (Kavanaugh, 1995). With time, Francoise became increasingly aware of the other women in Picasso’s life. Like Fernande Olivier, Francoise kept a diary of her life with Picasso which was published in book form in 1964. This book includes her recollections of his ongoing relationships with other women. Regarding Dora Maar, Francoise wrote: “Pablo would telephone to her when he wanted to see her. .... she had to hold herself in a state of permanent availability so that if he phoned or dropped by, he would ﬁnd her there” (p. 86). She also goes on to describe what would be Dora’s psychological breakdown which resulted in psychiatric hospitalization and treatment. In addition to Dora, Picasso continued to see Marie Therese twice weekly (Gilot & Lake, 1964). Picasso would continue the melodrama of creating tension between Francoise and his other women by comparing her to them. Later Francoise would write about her insight into Picasso’s standard technique of using people like ninepins, “. . of hitting one person with the ball in order to make another fall down” (p. 67). In addition, Francoise describes several abusive experiences; once Picasso held a burning cigarette to her cheek and on another occasion, laughingly put three scorpions in her bed while they were vacationing (Kavanaugh, 1995). De- spite Picasso’s insistence that Francoise have his child (Gilot & Lake, 1975), he apparently took only minimal interest in either Claude or Paloma, both of Francoise’s children, fathered by Picasso. In 1953, Francoise became involved with a man in Paris and left Picasso’s house, with her children, to begin a new relationship.

Jacqueline: Picasso’s Second Wife By the fall of 1953, Picasso’s life was in turmoil. Waiting in the wings was Jacqueline Rogue, a twenty-seven year old who would remain with Picasso until his death in 1973 (Richardson, 1991). In 1954, after Olga died of cancer, Jacqueline became Picasso’s second wife. Described by Crespelle (1969) as a doting creature, Jacqueline sat for hours watching Picasso at work in his studio, not speaking and barely breathing through the night and until dawn. During this period, Picasso, would become progressively more isolated from 174 M. Wilson his friends, family and the public. Marina Picasso (2001) described the controlling manner in which Jacqueline ferociously protected her husband in their fortress-like villa and where she directed who would be granted time with her aging husband. Marina (Picasso, 2002) describes numerous accounts of how she, her brother Pablito (translated as “little Pablo”), and her father, Paulo, came to the villa, begging for money, only to be turned down by Jacqueline who would announce loudly that “the monsignor was sleeping” or otherwise occupied and on more than one occasion, of her letting the guard dogs loose to chase them away. Despite Picasso’s considerable wealth, he was never generous with his money and, according to Marina, used his wealth to control and manipulate others who had grown dependent on him for financial support. There were similar accounts in his treatment of his other children, Paloma, Claude and Maya (O’Brian, 1976). In a 1966 self-portrait, Picasso would depict himself full-figured and nude. This depiction, however, bears no resemblance to his early portraits where he depicts himself as manly and viral. Despite being described as “remarkably fit” in his early 80’s (O’Brian, 1976), Picasso appears shrunken and small. The chair behind him appears to be offering him stability and the arm of the chair foreshadows his growing dependency on a walking cane. This portrayal of himself in a diminished form would continue in a series of self-portraits from the late 1960’s where Picasso repeatedly depicts himself as a “voyeur” of sexual acts (Figure 4). Holding his aging at bay, he emphasized his vitality and embellished attributes that had diminished or departed (Sims, 1996). Picasso’s fear of old age and death may have contributed to his iso- lation in his later years. Marina talks about how her grandfather became a hypochondriac with many imagined ailments with required frequent vis- its from his doctor (Picasso, 2002). Once again when confronted with the reality of impending loss and separation, Picasso became disorganized and relied on a psychosomatic defense to hold him together, much like the young schoolboy who pretended to be ill in order to remain at home rather than attend class. O’Brian (1976), speculates that Picasso’s fear of death was the reason that he refused to make a will, leaving his heirs to fight and squabble over his estate for years to come. Picasso’s last series of portraits reveal his fear of death. O’Brian, who attended the show, comments on his reactions in viewing the self-portraits on display in Avignon, France,

There were some huge heads . . . always crammed into their limits, always too large, too near for comfort, an enormously emphatic gesture right in front of one’s nose. They made me feel uneasy for the painter, for although it was absurd to look for the serenity of Matisse in Picasso or his particular aged wisdom, this half-seen striving had a nightmarish quality. (O’Brian, 1976, p. 474) From Obsession to Betrayal 175

The huge, nightmarish heads of which O’Brian speaks are like the one depicted in Figure 5. Large, perplexed eyes stare out at us with an uneasy lack of balance and proportion. We may, initially, feel repulsed by how the huge head strains and pleads for our attention and perhaps our pity, too. Gedo (1980) believes that these self-portraits are a fusion of Picasso’s own image and that of death. We are seemingly looking into the eyes of a man terriﬁed of dying who had devoured life and the people in it; who could not imagine for even one instant of letting go of what was his.

PSYCHOLOGICAL THEORIES

Patterns of problematic sexual behavior and chronic dysfunction in relationships can be examined from a variety of perspectives. Developmental theory offers a conceptual framework for understanding how childhood cir- cumstances impact adult behavior, especially the quality of relationships in adulthood. Since we know a good deal about Picasso’s childhood through 176 M. Wilson

FIGURE 5. Self-Portrait, 1972. ©2004 Estate of Pablo Picasso/Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York the many biographies written about his life, a developmental perspective seems appropriate for this investigation. Bowlby (1977) described attachment as the strong emotional bond that occurs between and infant/child and the primary caregiver, in most cases the mother. On the basis of childhood experiences, children begin to develop working models of intimacy, which provide a prototype for adult romantic relationships (Bower, 1997). Reciprocity of care giving and attachment functions are essential for a healthy relationship or marriage and clearly Picasso fell short in this area. This is reflected in his style of interaction in relationships as an adult. He sought out and thrived on the admiration. However, he could not sustain the closeness or intimacy once his partner began to assert her own needs or his initial attraction began to fade. One important aspect of attachment is the context within which human infants learn to regulate their emotions. A child’s affect regulation is structured with the help and responses of the child’s primary caregiver and therefore becomes a reflection of the caregiver’s reactions and behaviors to the child (Fonagy, 2002). Children adopt different strategies to regulate their emotional reactions. With so many “mothers” around Picasso in those From Obsession to Betrayal 177 early years, the chances are good that few needs or wants went unmet. If his mother was busy with her two younger children, we might suspect that Picasso learned simply go to another one of the “mothers” in his household. If this, indeed, was the case, having his needs met by several women at the same time became a childhood pattern successfully recreated again and again in his adult relationships. It is doubtful if he experienced much, if any frustration during those formative years and, in fact, was probably over stim- ulated by being continually surrounded by five women. Undoubtedly this overstimulation felt overwhelming and suffocating at times, particularly as young Pablo began to assert his independence, resulting in complex feelings of over-dependence and enmeshment. We might also suspect that Picasso’s pattern of creating melodrama in his relationships by setting up competitive scenarios was also a repetitive behavior carried over from childhood. Un- doubtedly the five “mothers” in that early household were competitive for the young man’s attention, since much of the self-esteem for the women of that time period and culture was related to their abilities as a caretaker, mother, wife and homemaker. With Don Jose safely ensconced in his studio across town, Picasso was the only “man” in the house left to impress. Consistent with the many reports of Picasso’s difficulty adhering to the structure and rules of the school setting and his parents’ inability to effec- tively reinforce these standards comes the failure to provide optimal, grad- ual frustrating experiences early in the child’s life, including the setting of appropriate boundaries. Such failure significantly hinders the child’s development, especially the ability to accept and adapt to the reality of his or her limitations and, thus to develop a more realistic ego ideal (Kernberg, 1975). Kernberg (1975) describes the mother’s narcissistic use of the child through engendered feelings of specialness and by fostering a quest for admiration and greatness, while reinforcing pathological defenses such as devaluation of others. Imbesi, reports in her 1999 research on the etiol- ogy of narcissism, the consistency of parental depression and guilt-laden masochistic submissiveness to their children. This results in the parents being unable to set appropriate limits with their children, allowing them to control them and the household (Imbesi, 1999). We might suspect that Don Jose, depressed and guilty about not taking a more active role in the household and angry with himself for his failure to provide a comfortable lifestyle for his family, was more permissive than most parents of this time, fail- ing to establish effective boundaries and consequences for young Picasso. Don Jose’s failures undoubtedly had a profound effect on Picasso and, perhaps afraid that he would become ineffectual like his father, drove Picasso towards his controlling and sometimes brutal treatment of those closest to him. Gedo (1980) takes issue with Picasso’s idyllic memories of his mother, cautioning that his memories are not consistent with these adult behaviors. She further states that Picasso repeatedly involved himself with women who 178 M. Wilson demonstrated the same tyrannical, yet fragile qualities as his mother. He selected women who combined stubbornness with extreme psychological or physical frailty; or ones who were so much younger that their very youth implied a dependence and inequality of power within the relationship. Olga Koklova apparently suffered psychotic disturbances while associated with Picasso and Dora Maar experienced a psychological breakdown which resulted in psychiatric hospitalization and treatment, and eventually her suicide. Franscoise Gilot experienced a much milder, but nonetheless crippling depressive reaction during her initial years with Picasso, and Marie-Therese Walter committed suicide in October 1977, shortly before what should have been Picasso’s 96th birthday (Gedo, 1980). Fernande Olivier’s memoirs con- tain accounts of her mistreatment and abuse at the hands of her aunt who reluctantly took her to live with her in exchange for money from Olivier’s parents (Olivier, 2001). At age 18, her aunt forced her into a marriage with a man who raped and beat her. Francoise Gilot describes in detail her difficult childhood filled with repeated physical and emotional abuse from her violent, controlling father (Gilot & Lake, 1975). Adams (1991) describes covert incest as occurring when a child becomes the object of a parent’s affection, love, passion and preoccupation. The parent, motivated by the loneliness of a troubled marriage or relationship, makes the child a surrogate partner. Although covert incest may not involve touch- ing or sexual violation, the boundary is crossed when the role of the child exists to meet the emotional needs of the parent, resulting in a psychological marriage of sorts. Maria’s preoccupation with her beautiful young son filled her own intimacy needs, unmet by her depressed and emotionally unavailable husband. Adams (1991), continues by saying that the child feels trapped and victimized, but is not able to process these feelings due to shame and loyalty towards the surrogate parent. He says that the parent’s love feels con- fining, intrusive and demanding rather than nurturing. Adams distinguishes between overt and covert incest with, “while the overt victim feels abused, the covert victim feels idealized and privileged” (1991, p. 10). Covert incest as a child results in intimacy and relationship struggles in adulthood. Perfection becomes the criteria by which decisions about relationships are made, and since perfection is never possible, victims of covert incest never feel satisfied in their relationships. Despite their desperate need to be loved, fear of intimacy and ambivalence about commitment keeps them in a chronic place of disappointment (Adams, 1991). In a similar tone, Gedo (1980) continues by claiming that Picasso’s art, like his life, depended on partnerships and that he experienced disorganization when alone. She says that his partnerships were not limited to women, however, and he chose different types of partners to serve different functions in his life. She believes that this unusual dependence on partnerships originated in the artist’s early childhood and specifically in his ambivalent relationship with his mother. As stated earlier, Gedo (1980) disputes From Obsession to Betrayal 179

Picasso’s idyllic memories of his mother, saying that psychoanalytic experience suggests that men who love fragile, psychotic women nearly always have severely disturbed mothers. She suggests that Picasso’s mother dominated the family not by virtue of her strength as he would have us believe, but through her weaknesses. Gedo further says that such mothers are particularly prone to exaggerate their male children through a kind of symbiotic enmeshment from which the child cannot extricate himself, such as in the case of covert incest described by Adams (1991). This occurs more read- ily if the young mother is married to a man many years her senior as was the case with Picasso’s parents (Gedo, 1980). Mothers with such extreme symbiotic needs often cannot divide their attention between two children successfully and their attention is given in an all or nothing fashion. When a new baby arrives on the scene, they often withdraw their investment from the older child to focus almost exclusively on the newborn, who then becomes the primary object of their affections (Gedo, 1980). As an adult Picasso would react to the birth of his children with agitation and ambivalence, reac- tivating his fear of abandonment in being replaced by another. In addition, his relationships clearly mirrored the all-or-nothing attention of a symbiotic mother, alternating between enmeshment and detachment; obsession and betrayal. Lastly, Carnes (1997) discusses how high intensity in a relationship can be mistaken for intimacy. Intensity thrives on fear and arousal, especially sexual arousal and the fear of sexual betrayal. Intensity serves as a distraction from oneself and high drama becomes a way to manage anxiety (1997). Perpetual drama and machismo were essential parts of Picasso’s birthright (Richardson, 1991) and used as a way to manage his anxiety over perceived loss, his advancing age and his fear of being alone. Marina Picasso (2002) would describe Picasso’s relationship with his women in this way, “Mixing blood and sperm, he exalted them in his paintings, imposed his violence on them, and sentenced them to death when he felt a dulling of the sexual power they instilled in him” (p. 81).

PICASSO’S LEGACY

Picasso would leave behind a considerable legacy. Valued at 260 million dol- lars, Jacqueline inherited the largest portion of Picasso’s estate. He left behind 1885 paintings, 1228 sculptures, 2880 ceramic pieces, 18, 095 engravings, 6112 lithographs, 3181 linocuts 7089 drawings, 149 notebooks, 11 tapestries and 8 rugs (Kavanaugh, 1995). Several days after Picasso’s death, Pablito, his namesake and grandson by Paulo, swallowed a container of bleach, resulting in his death three months later in the hospital (Picasso, 2002). Pablito’s desperate act occurred after being turned away from his grandfather’s funeral by Jacqueline, who called the police to remove him from the gates of the villa. 180 M. Wilson

Three years later, Pablito’s father, Picasso’s son, Paulo, died of alcoholism. Five years after his death, Marie Therese hanged herself. Jacqueline, after arranging for a show of Picasso’s works in Madrid, shot herself (Kavanaugh, 1995). Sadly, Picasso died expressing his disappointment with love (Olivier, 2001; Gilot & Lake, 1975), disparaging that despite his many lovers, he had never known love. O’Brian (1976) speculated that Picasso’s life-long search for a soul mate ended in his disillusionment at never being able to ﬁnd a true friend. Picasso himself was quoted as saying: “I have had no true friends, only lovers” (p. 81).

CLOSING REMARKS

The behaviors described here involving sexual excess, romantic intrigue and relationship dysfunction are familiar to professionals who treat individuals who are sexually addicted. This is particularly the case for clients who com- mand the same celebrity, power and wealth as Picasso. With these attributes also often comes arrogance, entitlement and exploitation at the expense of others. These characteristics provide sex addicts with a buffer that defends them against feelings of loneliness and emptiness, as well as against the limitations of being human. Picasso was groomed at an early age to feel special and unique. In adulthood, Picasso’s fame and wealth would provide him with a lifestyle that perpetuated that uniqueness. Fame, wealth and power in turn insulated him from the limitations of being human and also from being totally accountable for his actions. Perhaps his lifelong fear of sickness and death were areas where he felt both human and accountable and that is why he defended so strongly against them. Picasso used his romantic relationships like a drug. Initially, representing the idealized mother in the eyes of a small boy, the women in Picasso’s life could not sustain his love or admiration. When his passion began to decline, he would turn up the heat by creating melodrama through crisis by having an affair or setting up competition between his mistresses. Alternating between misogyny and tenderness, insatiable neediness and heartless manipulation, Picasso felt entitled to have women cater to his deepest psychic needs as well as his childish whims (Richardson, 1991). Completely incapable of re- nouncing a single moment of his life or of giving up something that had belonged to him, Picasso trailed behind him the submissive, shrewish or bad-tempered procession of his former mistresses, and yet, by his accounts, he never felt loved (Crespelle, 1967). The experiences, emotions, and images of Picasso’s early childhood echoed through his art and for the duration of his life. Clearly this paper has not considered the cultural or generational im- plications of Picasso’s life in any substantial way nor has it argued for or From Obsession to Betrayal 181 against other proposed theories about his life. The information presented in this paper hopes to enrich the literature already available. It is likely that had Picasso met criteria for diagnosis, he would have beneﬁted from treatment for sex and love addiction and involvement in a 12 Step fellowship. He might have salvaged his relationships and spared those closest to him the considerable anguish that came to eventually deﬁne their lives. With treatment, he would likely have become a better husband, father and grandfather. His fear of sickness and death might have turned philosophical through involvement in a spiritual practice and belief in a Higher Power. It is very likely that in addition to his considerable material wealth, he would have left behind a legacy of hope and, most importantly, he might have died knowing how much he was loved.

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