Sak Yant" (Thai Traditional) Tattoo in Bangkok
Total Page:16
File Type:pdf, Size:1020Kb
Samples of Website Content, Blogs & Other Freelance Writing (All Written to specific guidelines) By Martin Bower Contents THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO GETTING A TATTOO IN BANGKOK THAT YOU’LL REGRET LATER .....................................................................................................................1 GETTING A "SAK YANT" (THAI TRADITIONAL) TATTOO IN BANGKOK ...............8 HOW MUCH DOES A TATTOO COST IN THAILAND? .................................................. 12 EXAMPLES OF WEB PAGES WRITTEN FOR A NEW THAILAND TRAVEL WEBSITE/APP ....................................................................................................................... 16 MATCHED PROFITS ............................................................................................................ 58 IT STRATEGY - FINDING SCALABLE SOLUTIONS FOR LEGACY SYSTEMS. ........ 66 HOW TO PREPARE FOR AN INTERVIEW....................................................................... 74 THE CASE FOR RECURRING CARD PAYMENTS VS DIRECT DEBITS ..................... 80 WHAT DOES BREXIT MEAN TO EU DATA PROTECTION LAWS? ............................ 85 TWO STEP AUTHENTICATION – HOW WILL THIS AFFECT MY BUSINESS? ........ 90 HOW TO AVOID 10 COMMON REASONS FOR FAILURE WITH YOUR IT OUTSOURCING PARTNERS. .............................................................................................. 95 EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE IN THE WORKPLACE................................................ 101 BLACK FRIDAY – DON’T BELIEVE THE HYPE ........................................................... 105 USING TECHNOLOGY TO DRIVE GROWTH AND INNOVATION. ........................... 109 FORMULA E - THE WINNING FORMULA ..................................................................... 114 FULL TEXT & LAY-OUT DESIGN FOR A NEW THAILAND-BASED WEBSITE ...... 119 VIP REMOVALISTS SYDNEY ........................................................................................... 137 TERMITE INFESTATION .................................................................................................. 146 BLOG - MENTORING FUTURES TRADERS .................................................................. 148 ORDER FLOW WEBSITE .................................................................................................. 152 PRO BOND CLEANING SYDNEY ..................................................................................... 161 PRO ASBESTOS REMOVAL MELBOURNE ................................................................... 164 SALES LETTER ................................................................................................................... 178 SALES 2 ................................................................................................................................ 179 PRO TREE REMOVAL MELBOURNE ............................................................................. 183 VIP LOCKSMITH MELBOURNE...................................................................................... 187 PRO ELECTRICIAN SYDNEY .......................................................................................... 200 No.1 CARPET CLEANING MELBOURNE ....................................................................... 219 PRO PEST CONTROL MELBOURNE .............................................................................. 238 AMATEUR RADIO .............................................................................................................. 242 DRUMS AND DRUMMING ................................................................................................ 247 FOOTBALL .......................................................................................................................... 251 IT CONSULTING ................................................................................................................. 255 MOTOR CYCLE CLUBS .................................................................................................... 260 ONLINE DATING ................................................................................................................ 264 PHOTOGRAPHY ................................................................................................................. 268 SCOTTISH ARTS ................................................................................................................. 272 TATTOOS AND BODY PIERCING ................................................................................... 276 LIGHTING DESIGN ............................................................................................................ 280 THAILAND - 18 NORTHERN PROVINCES ..................................................................... 281 LINKS TO SAMPLES OF MY WORK ON 'LIVE' WEBSITES....................................... 307 1 THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO GETTING A TATTOO IN BANGKOK THAT YOU’LL REGRET LATER (tone – humorous) For most visitors to Bangkok - whether as a tourist or an expat - getting a tattoo to commemorate their trip to the "Land of Smiles" has become something of a tradition. As with most traditions however, there is a dark side. There is a small segment of these “tattoo types” who go way over the top. These reprehensible types end up with tattoos that are not only carried out safely, but they are also correctly spelled AND contain beautiful designs. Who do they think they are? How dare they? They have gone about it all wrong, and by doing so, have severely damaged the reputation of Bangkok tattoos. The whole point of getting a tattoo in Thailand is so that you can spend the rest of your life shopping for long-sleeved T-Shirts, and getting changed quickly at your gym so nobody has time to spot the eyesore on your back. Isn’t that right? As an added bonus, you can even claim your “15 minutes of fame” by participating in a TV show like, “Tattoo Fixers,” where the only criteria for applicants is possessing a disastrous tattoo - the worse the better. So why miss out on all that fun? If you follow the guidelines below, we promise that you will be successful in getting your perfectly imperfect tattoo done wrong, the first time! Two good ways to find a bad tattoo parlour: 2 1. Go to Khao San Road and get drunk and disorderly. As every traveler to Bangkok should know, Khao San Road is the place to go if you want something done fantastically badly. In this amazing road, so beloved of western backpackers, you will see sights such as: Middle class white kids who have recently converted to Rastafarianism for their trip to Asia, and who have invested in stunning polyester dreadlocks, and speak in hip Jamaican rap-speak that nobody can understand. Westerners fully embracing Thai culture by stuffing themselves with genuine “traditional” Pad Thai dishes consisting of a pack of 7/11 mama noodles and a fried duck egg. Incredible men's outfitters where you can buy an “Armani Boss” or “Ralph Lorenzo” suit, complete with branded belt, tie and cufflinks for fifty bucks. In an area that is a haven for drunken foreigners and for Thai teenagers playing the traditional Thai game of “spot the drunkest wife beater," this is the perfect first stop-off if you are truly looking to get a terrible tattoo. The best part for us lazy westerners is that we don’t even have to go looking for a tattoo - they will come to you! How is that? Well, look for any open bar that proclaims “Cheap Buckets", perch yourself on a half-broken plastic seat, and start downing the noxious mixture as if your life depended on it. Sooner or later, you will be approached by a very friendly man with a battered plastic folder that is filled with pixelated pictures downloaded from the internet. How will I know he's selling tattoos? Easy. If he has approached you and said: “Wassup man”, or “Hey boss”, or “Cool man, cool man”, there is a 50/50 chance he is either selling a suit or a tattoo. Then, if he points to a tattoo you already have on your pinky-white body, or he shows you his “slip on tattoo sleeve”, you know you're in! 3 Follow the friendly gentlemen to his establishment in as straight a line as your “three bucket” legs will allow; flop down on a cracked plastic leatherette sofa; take a quick, blurry-eyed flick through the plastic book to choose a design - and you’re all set. Within the space of a couple of hours, you will be the proud new owner of a terrible tattoo that you can be gleefully ashamed of. (insert picture, i.e. “bad gorilla) 2. Ask a Tuk-Tuk driver This is possibly even better than going to Khao San Road; as wherever a Tuk-Tuk driver tells you to go, you can be sure that it's definitely the best place. Bangkok is a city which is blessed with an extensive network of an air-conditioned sky-trains, underground-trains, cheap air conditioned taxis, Uber taxis and even speedy motorcycles who can zip their way around the traffic. But everybody knows that by far the best form of transport to use is in this hot congested city are the slow, dangerous and wonderful Thai Tuk-Tuks with their smarmy ex-con drivers and expert over-pricing. Tuk-tuks can be found in various locations in the city, and the best way to track one down is by looking outside mid to low priced hotels and at popular tourist attractions. Tuk-Tuk drivers are well-known for their expertise in pinpointing the very best places in the city that have everything a visitor would need, such as: The most remote and hidden “special” massage establishments. Back-alley tailor shops with amazing deals on “branded” fabrics Some very expensive but beautiful cubic zirconias that put most