7th Annual Sol Kanee Lecture (2009) — Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish Page 1 of 4

is man, and human-made. And it can be 7TH ANNUAL SOL KANEE LECTURE prevented! NOVEMBER 2, 2009 From the first moment, as a believer with deep DR. IZZELDIN ABUELAISH faith, the first message of passion and support and to start behave as a physician who thinks of saving “FORGIVENESS AS A PATHWAY IN THE lives. As a physician, I don’t deal with dead JOURNEY OF PEACE” patients. I deal with living patients, to save their lives. Thanks God, and as I believe, God plans

and gives the strength to face the tragedies. And I fully believe that this tragedy was for good from Mr. Murray S. Palay, Board Member, Arthur V. the first moment, because as you know, this Mauro Centre for Peace and Justice: Ladies and craziness in December and January between gentlemen, it is my privilege to welcome the 2009 Palestinians and Israelis was a secret, and the Sol Kanee lecturer on peace and justice, Dr. brigadiers practiced against the Gazan civilians, Izzeldin Abuelaish. that no one knows about it. It was a secret, and the secret must be disclosed. And someone must (Applause) carry the responsibility of that.

Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish: Thank you so much, We were planning, me and my daughters, where thank you. It’s a moment that I feel so moved and to go, as I have two offers, one to be at the thrilled, and would love to tell my daughters that University of Haifa, and one to go to the their lives will make a difference in the human University of . One of my daughters who life, and that’s what we need to look forward. Can were killed, she said, “I want to fly.” we prevent any more tragedies? Can we change course to be creative and save lives? And not to It was a plan to be at 4:30, to be interviewed live have any more tragedies in this world? by the Israeli TV through the cell phone about issues related to women’s health. But then in a For me, as a Palestinian who was born, raised, and sudden, someone in this world does not want the is still living in the refugee camp, the voice of peace to be loud, the voice of wisdom. sixteenth of January, even number sixteen, it’s But I think he made a big mistake. The voice of imprinted in my mind, but I fully believe that this wisdom came louder and stronger. Immediately I was for good. It wasn’t for bad. Sixteenth of called my friends who were waiting there in the August 2008, I went—I was in travel just to find a studio. And I think it was a plan by God. This place where can I take my family with me, and to secret must be disclosed to show the brigadiers select between Belgium, Kenya, or Uganda. But and the craziness and the size of suffering the life we can’t plan and we can’t achieve what do Gazans were exposed to. we want. While I am screaming and crying and looking at Sixteenth of August, quarter to five, 2008, I lost my son, Mohammed, who is thirteen years old, I my wife. It’s not easy moment to have eight didn’t think of the killed, I started to think of my th children. But 16 of January, quarter to five, I lost daughter, Shathat, Raida, my niece, my brother, my three precious daughters, niece, and my and my children. And to think of Mohammed, daughters, niece, were severely wounded. I think what is he going to do? How can he run his life from the first moment I realized it was for good. after he lost his sister Bessan, who was his mother, Maybe for the short term, and for the short-term his sister, his friend, everything in his life? run to lose my wife sixteenth of September, it was Bessan, who was the soldier for peace that I send painful, but I think God planned that, this order, to to New Mexico and Santa Fe to be the first lose my wife sixteenth of September, I think, it Palestinian girl in Creativity for Peace Camp. was for her, that she would never cope to see her There, she discovered the other side, the Israeli daughters killed in front of her eyes. So this was side, and that they are similar, and that’s what she the first message, that what is happening in our said. Mohammed look at me, he looked at me, life, what is from God is for good, but what is bad and asked me, “Why are you crying and 7th Annual Sol Kanee Lecture (2009) — Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish Page 2 of 4 screaming? You must be happy.” “Happy of The causes of hatred we must search inside each what?” “You must be happy my sisters are with of us. Not to go outside. It’s inside our hearts. I their mom. Their mom asked for them, and they don’t think anyone of us want to be full of toxins. are happy there.” I said, “I don’t need to worry Hatred is a toxin. It’s noxious and destructive, about my son.” If this thirteen years old is and we must be purified of that. And to be showing me the passion and how can I look purified of that, we must start to find the causes forward, so I have to look forward. behind that which is inside our heart. As a believer, God will never change what is between When I saw them that I don’t want anyone in the people and in people themselves unless they world to witness what I have seen. Those change what is in their hearts and their souls. So beautiful girls became parts, their brains spread we must start the change, and the change is over the ceiling, drowning in a pool of blood. starting inside each of us. Their heads were decapitated for nothing they did. Just full of dreams, of hopes, of education, of life We are facing, as a human being, challenges and and passion to others. it’s the role of leaders. Leaders can’t be leaders if they are not challenging and risk-takers. Today But as you know, we are all human, and we all the world is in need, more than any time ago, for make mistakes. And the past can’t return. I fully leaders who have the moral courage to act believe that what I have lost, what was taken from positively and make a positive difference in me, will never come back. I realized that from the human life. We must not give up, but be first moment. I need to go forward and be determined and work hard. We need to discover motivated by the spirit of those I lost and to do the humanness inside each of us and adopt it as them justice that you mentioned. That justice is our pathway. We have to defend loudly the one of the main needs of humankind, and that humanity that we all belong to, and in this way, what are we looking for. But for justice to we defend ourselves. We must go up, not to go achieve, it needs action, and it’s a matter of action. down in that way. We become closer and humanity brings all of us together. When a I lost three precious daughters, but I am blessed Canadian defends someone in this world, he is with five other children and the future. I believe defending himself. He is not defending someone life like riding a bicycle: to keep balanced, we else; he is defending a humanity that he shares must keep moving. And I assure you, and want with others. Can we speak with a human voice? from every one of you if you face any challenge, Can we discover the humanness inside of each of not a tragedy, he has to keep moving, and I assure us? And that’s what we need. Our children, they you I will keep moving forward more determined discovered it before us, and they practice it. Can and more strengthened. we follow our children in that? And then after that, what comes the choice? The And it comes now to action. It’s good that we are crossroads: the path of light or the path of meeting and willingness to do something and to darkness. I chose the first. This path, the path of talk. Willingness, talking, and meeting is good, light, in the long run is most efficient and right but it is not enough. We must act. Martin Luther choice than to live with hatred or to be consumed King said, “Our lives begin to end the day we with revenge with all the medical consequences. become silent about things that matter. In the end, That no one knows them better than my we will remember not the words of our enemies, profession—heart diseases, hypertension—and I but the silence of our friend”—of our human have to look forward and to be healthy to face any being that we share. Then when we speak about other challenges that I am going to face in the forgiveness, forgiveness depends on truth, and it’s future. I fully believe that the hurt that doesn’t kill important to be honest with each other. It’s a you will strengthen you more than before. window of opportunity to be open and honest with And we must use our minds. Darkness and hatred each other. will never be driven out by darkness or hatred. To From the first moment of the tragedy, I know who drive out darkness, we need light. To drive out shelled the house. For three weeks I used to be hatred, we need love. And where is love lying? 7th Annual Sol Kanee Lecture (2009) — Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish Page 3 of 4 informal correspondent to Israeli radio and TV. We speak about forgiveness and peace. What is And my message was one message, that this war, peace? I don’t think peace is a word or the right this craziness, succeeded in one thing: to word that we use. Because we overuse this word strengthen animosity, bloodshed, hatred, and to and we don’t know the meaning of that word. widen the gap between Palestinians and Israelis. Peace is not a destination that we want to reach And I was thinking always, how can we as health there. I fully believe that peace is a journey, and care professionals, psychiatrists, sociologists, we must equip ourselves with engines, with psychologists to rehabilitate the destruction equipments for this journey, so that this journey induced by this craziness? can be comfortable and pleasant. Forgiveness as health, as friendship, as business, as many But what happened? We must have the courage to concepts of our lives can be engines in our peace admit our responsibilities of our actions and to be journey. So what do we need to equip and to help open. The scenarios started. The first scenario our people? Be equipped with these engines to that there were snipers at the roof of my house. If have a pleasant and a comfortable peace journey. they saw the snipers, why they didn’t shell them? Why they didn’t kill them? But I think there were As a physician, still there is hope. As a physician, snipers. I will never lose hope as long as the patient is still alive, though in a critical situation. For us as My daughters were the most expert snipers. To Palestinians and Israelis, our situation is critical, achieve their goals and to be successful that all of but we must not lose hope. Seeing you here them never succeeded less than ninety-seven gathering gives me the hope that we have to percent. The teachers were fighting to get them in continue our sincere efforts, but we need to their classes. And in a story it has one scenario, change course and be creative in our treatment. and it’s important for us to use our minds. We don’t want to take anything from anyone else for Concerning forgiveness, two weeks ago, I was in granted; we must think of that. We must use our Prague, giving a talk in Forum 2000. As you minds. We don’t want to be underestimated by know, Ehud Barak, he was Minister of Defense others. during the war and the craziness between Palestinians and Israelis. My daughter, niece, and The second day there were militants inside the brother were treated in a hospital where I used to apartment. And the scenarios we were creative in work in . He used to come to visit the having more and more scenarios. And the last injured Israeli soldiers, but no Israeli official scenario that they took shrapnel from my niece’s expressed sorrow about that. But the passion and wounds and they examined it and it was found to the support that I got from colleagues, friends, and be from Quassam rockets. I think nothing killing people that I don’t know was more than enough. I and nothing painful than stabbing a dead person. know politicians, what’s their role. In that It’s immoral, unethical, to stab someone who is meeting in Prague, he was supposed to come to killed. Why is this happening in this world? give a talk. The Egyptian ambassador asked me, “Are you willing to attend his talk?” I started to But what I can say to you: you must be confident think. Then I said, “I have to be there.” I sat the in your cause, not to give up. It took one month, first line, because Ehud he knows who is Izzeldin. and after one month the truth came out. The IDF While he’s speaking, he saw me, and he started to announced its responsibility about shelling the wave by his hand. After he finished his talk and house. And I think it was a window of he left, after he walked for about twenty minutes, opportunity to speak about honesty and truth, and he remembered Izzeldin is there, and he came we must be open with each other, and we must back. And that’s what I told: “Remember, Ehud? start from there. When did we meet last time? This meeting was Forgiveness will help you move forward, away supposed to be in Tel Aviv, but never mind, it’s from the pain of the past, and to be focused on the not late, we must look forward.” Ten months, it’s future with all of its brightness. Indeed, not late, and that’s what do we need. We need to forgiveness opens the door to a future that will not communicate; we need to speak with each other. repeat the old tragedies. Once we communicate, we build a trust, which is 7th Annual Sol Kanee Lecture (2009) — Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish Page 4 of 4 broken. If I wasn’t there, nothing will happen in even with this enormous loss. I have been the right direction. So we must face each other strengthened from their strength. I am and express our pains and be honest with each more determined from their other. determination. I am more at peace from their peacefulness. So what do we need? We need to understand and respect each other and that the dignity of all is Bessan, forgive me for not being able to equal. And what do we need? To live in save you from my own people. Forgive collaboration and partnership and sharing, if not in me for giving you hope that peace is peace. We need to smash and destroy the mental possible and then taking that dream from and physical barriers within each of us and you. You will always be my symbol of between us. With open minds, eyes, and big hope, peace, and mostly gentleness. Your hearts, we can create and have a bright future for dad shared a dream with me days after all. And that’s what do we need. you died. He came into a room full of men, and there you were, sitting amongst And then I come to love, which is important. Our them. He asked you, “Why are you sitting hearts are not just there to pump the blood. It’s here, Bessan? You know, it’s not there to have other functions, and we must use our acceptable in our society.” You hearts. And that’s the poem, which was written by answered, “All is fine, now, Dad. I am Israeli woman who was the mother for my happy and well. I can be here now among daughters, and she is the facilitator for Creativity the men where I am needed.” May no for Peace Camp where love resides in memory of other woman need to die in order to be Bessan. Bessan is my eldest daughter, was able to influence the men, as you have supposed to get her B.A. last June. been, Bessan. May we women be heard and heeded, and may the men in this I long to touch you Bessan, one more world get the chance to know from deep time, to hug you, to tell you how sorry I within their hearts that this is where the am that your mom died. But now you, answer lies: in their hearts where love too, are gone. Your smiling face, your resides. gentle way, your softness, your non- judgmental words, your pain for your What do we need to live here, to discover our people, your way of life, your dreams, humanness, and to open our hearts, minds, and aspiration, and your hope for peace. Just eyes, and to have open arms to each other: this days before the war I spoke with your dad. will give us the hope and the bright future for a He gave me your phone number; it’s still human being in this world which is full of pain in my car. Every day I glance at the and suffering. Thank you so much. number, seeing your name, Bessan. I wish I had spoken with you more, but I (Applause) didn’t have the guts. I spoke with you three days before you died. Thank you, thank you so much.

I told you that I am praying for your (Applause, standing ovation) safety. My prayers were not heard Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you so through the shelling, the bombing, the much. Thank you. Quassams, the smoke. I feel I have been betrayed—by God, by my country, by the cruelty of humanity, by the warmongers, by those who think violence is the solution. And with all of this, I have been given a gift to have spent six weeks with Shathat and Izzeldin. I have no words of revenge, no hatred. I have no anger. I have the deep belief that peace is possible,