Giving Your Baby a Smart Start

1 a Smart St Giving Your Baby art

Dear Parents, Neuroscience research tells us that experience wires the brain. Babies are born with only a minimal amount of neurological wiring. They have a little wiring for hearing, some primitive wiring for vision, and some wiring in the low functioning part of the brain called the cerebellum. The higher regions of the brain (those used for language, social interactions, self-control, motor control and critical thinking) are not yet wired. The neurons are there and ready to be connected but those connections are dependent on the child’s senses to bring information from the child’s experiences into the brain.

It is experience that wires the brain and repetition that strengthens the wiring. By age three, 85% of the foundation of the brain will be wired. By age five, 95% of the foundation of the brain will be wired.

Can Do What You

• Give your baby time to slowly adjust to the outside world. He will use his senses to explore but he can only absorb a small amount of sensory stimulation at one time. Be careful not to over stimulate your child with too much visual clutter and noise or too many choices. • Develop trust by meeting your baby’s needs as soon as possible. Knowing that someone is there to care for her, leads your child to feel safe. Trust is the foundation of emotional intelligence. You cannot “spoil” a baby. • Talk to your baby even though he doesn’t understand your words yet. Talking to him develops his language and will increase his vocabulary when he begins to speak. • Teach your baby to calm herself by breathing deeply while holding her close. You will find she syncs her breathing to yours. • Protect your baby from viewing television and computer screens. A baby’s brain is busy wiring for a three-dimensional world. Two-dimensional screens hamper this wiring and interfere with the brain’s job of wiring for distance vision. • Expose your baby to bright primary colors. He arrived seeing only black and white. His brain will be wiring for color all throughout the first year of life and fine tuning that wiring for the next few years. • Encourage your baby to explore cause and effect. Provide a variety of rattles and musical toys, such as busy boxes and jack-in-the-boxes. Show your baby how to shake rattles harder to make louder sounds and how to bang them to make a completely different sound. • Be fully present with your baby. Spend quality time with your baby each day. The quality of time spent with little ones is far more important than the quantity of time.

2 s of Opportuni Understanding Window ty

Dear Parents, There are windows of time when the brain is most fertile for wiring and strengthening specific skills. These fertile times are referred to as “windows of opportunity.” When positive experiences occur within these fertile windows of opportunity, brain wiring is optimized.

Skills Wiring Opportunity Greatest Enhancement Emotional Intelligence 0 – 48 months 4 years to puberty

Trust 0 –14 months

Impulse Control 16 – 48 months Social Development 0 – 48 months 4 years to puberty

Attachment 0 –12 months

Independence 18 – 36 months

Cooperation 24 – 48 months Cognitive Development 0 – 48 months 4 years to puberty

Cause and Effect 0 –16 months

Problem Solving 16 – 48 months Physical Development 0 – 24 months 2 years to puberty Language Development 0 – 24 months 2- 7 years

Early Sounds 4 – 8 months 8 months to puberty

Vocabulary 0 – 24 months 2- 5 years

Can Do What You

• Make sure your child has plenty of positive experiences and interactions in the early years. • Develop social and emotional intelligence by being available to your child and helping your child understand her emotions. When she shows interest in others, provide opportunities for interactions (play dates, mother’s day out, school). • Expand cognitive skills by encouraging your child to explore his world—to figure out how things work and what causes things to happen. • Build language by talking, reading and singing to your little one. • Develop physical skills (motor skills) by giving your child plenty of opportunities to move. Keeping your child restrained, such as in a feeding chair or swing, will inhibit her physical development. Any time your child is awake, she belongs in a safe, open space that encourages movement. As your child becomes mobile, provide safe climbing and scooting apparatus.

Dear Parents, A baby’s vision is suited to social interaction right from birth. Babies can focus fairly well on objects that are 9-14 inches away. This is about the distance of your face when you are holding your baby in a cradle position. A baby’s ability to see your face plays a primary role in bonding. A baby’s vision at birth is blurry but will steadily improve over the next few months. Babies will begin to distinguish colors between the second and third month of life. Their range of vision will improve to several feet by the end of the second month and, by the third month, they will show interest in people and things across the room. A baby’s vision will not be 20/20 until after the first year. The American Pediatric Association recommends no television, tablets, or computers for children younger than two. Because a baby’s brain is wiring for a three-dimensional world, overuse of two-dimensional objects can be confusing to this process.

Can Do What You

• Hold your newborn close to your face when speaking to him. Your baby’s favorite thing to look at is your face! • Provide three-dimensional objects for your child to interact with visually. Limit exposure to technology. • During your child’s first month of life, place objects you want him to see about 10 inches from his face. During the second month, you can place objects a couple of feet away. • Move objects in front of your child between the second and third month to allow him to practice tracking. • Surround your child with colorful toys. • Babies enjoy looking at broad stripes that are alternating light and dark colors. Hang a striped blanket over the side of your baby’s crib or place your baby on top of this blanket when he is playing on the floor. • Choose brightly-colored toys rather than pale-colored toys when selecting new items of interest for your baby. • Protect your baby’s eyes from the sun. Place a shade on car windows. Have your child wear sunglasses if possible. • Don’t expect your baby to be able to stare at you for a long period of time. It takes great muscle control for him to hold your gaze. This ability will usually develop during the first month.

4 s Color Palette Developing Your Baby’

Dear Parents, Babies are born with a black and white color palette. Colors will wire as a baby experiences them in the outside world. Most babies show that they can distinguish the color red between the second and third month of life. Blue and green will follow within a couple of weeks. Yellow takes a little longer to emerge a month or two later. White becomes a color just after yellow. Black will not become a color, in and of itself, until around a baby’s first birthday. From this point through adolescence, fine variations in colors will be distinguished. Newborn babies will stare at black and white toys and objects because these colors intensify what they are able to see. This does not mean you need to offer only these colors to babies. A baby’s brain is wiring for color and interaction with colors is required to do this.

Can Do What You

• Surround your baby with colors, especially primary colors. Group the toys by color when playing with her. RED • When you notice your baby staring at a specific color ORANGE (most likely red first), provide a few objects of this YELLOW color for her to look at. • Expose your older infant to fine variations of colors, GREEN such as blocks in several shades of blue or stuffed BLUE animals in several shades of green. The more often a baby is exposed to variations in hues the more color PURPLE discriminate she will become. BROWN • Remember a baby is just developing the ability to distinguish colors. She is not learning to name and BLACK identify colors. This will come much later, usually at the end of the second year but sometimes even later. • Point out colors in books as you read to your baby. • Don’t overwhelm your baby with too many objects and too many colors at one time. Offer a couple of items at a time. • High contrast images are most appealing to your baby but keep it simple. Less is more when it comes to little ones.

5 ’s Acute Senses Respecting Your Baby

Dear Parents, Thanks to new findings from neuroscience research, we have a much greater understanding of the significant role senses play in a baby’s early brain development. Babies are born with only a minimal amount of neurological wiring. The higher regions of the brain (those used for language, social interactions, self-control, motor control and critical thinking) are not yet wired. The neurons are there and ready to be connected, but those connections are dependent on the child’s senses to bring information from the child’s experiences into the brain. A baby’s senses are more acute than those of adults. The amount of time babies spend in a watchful and aware state increases from only a few hours at birth to six or more hours per day by the middle of the first year. Because a baby’s senses are at their peak, babies can become easily overstimulated. When overstimulated, little ones may choose to sleep or they may cry for what appears to be no reason.

Can Do What You

• Engage your baby when he is responsive (eyes bright and focused, cooing and babbling, wiggling, smiling) and allow him to rest when he is not. • Keep lighting natural. Avoid bright lights. • Protect your baby from bright sun. • Play music at a moderate volume. Avoid loud music and loud noises. • Use fragrance-free cleaning supplies and other household products. • Use fragrance-free toiletries. Eliminate perfumes and colognes. Think about how it feels when you are with someone whose cologne is overpowering. Babies can feel that overpowering sense from household aerosols. • Offer your baby just one or two items or toys at a time. Too many items at one SOUND SMELL TASTE time may cause your baby to shut down. • Keep visual stimuli to a minimum. Decorate your baby’s room and play space sparingly and thoughtfully. • Babies prefer warmer temperatures than we do. Turn up the thermostat a couple of degrees or layer your baby’s clothing.

TOUCH SIGHT

6 l and More Singing is Joyfu

Dear Parents, Babies love music. They will generally stop what they are doing in order to pay closer attention when they hear a song. If you are singing to them directly, they will make eye contact with you and smile. While singing is joyful, it also has many other benefits. Generally singing creates a sense of well-being which in turn causes the brain to release endorphins that help protect the immune system and also act as a memory fixative. Ever wonder why you so easily remember TV ad jingles? All early sounds, including music and rhythms, play a profound role in shaping the brain. Linguistics, psychologists, and neuroscientists have recently changed their long-held opinion about the relationship between speaking and singing. The latest data shows that music and language are so intertwined that an awareness of music is critical to a baby’s language development. As children grow, music may foster their communication skills. Our sense of song helps us learn to talk, read, and even make friends.

Can Do What You

• Sing to your baby as often as possible. • Create songs about taking a bath, eating, changing a diaper, or any other routine. Sing about events and things that happen during the day. Your baby doesn’t care if you can carry a tune or if your song has rhyme or even makes sense. Just have fun! • Sing along with songs on the radio. • Make an effort to learn songs that are sung to your baby at school. Sing these songs at home. • Play music for your baby when she is awake. Play a variety of music styles, such as country, classical, pop, and jazz. Babies have sensitive hearing so keep the volume low. Music played at a decibel level that is too high can damage a baby’s ears. • Play a musical instrument (xylophone, bells, piano) when you sing. Your baby will enjoy the novelty. • Smile when you sing. Remember singing is joyful!

Rain, Rain, Go Away Rock-a-Bye Baby Rain, rain go away. Rock-a-bye baby in the tree top. Come again another day. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock. Little baby wants to play. When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, Come again another day. And down will come baby, cradle and all.

7 e Transitions Helping Your Baby Mak

Dear Parents, Everyone needs time to make transitions. Transitions are about change. It takes the brain a few minutes to tune in to new experiences, people, or environments. Adults are used to making transitions. Babies are not. Transitions for infants are also about change (a passage from one experience, caregiver, stage or activity to another) but occur more often and are less expected than those adults make. It is important for adults to recognize that infants react to even the smallest changes in their lives. For babies, some transitions occur with physical development. They move quickly from being totally helpless to being able to sit, crawl and walk. Some transitions occur because of caregiver changes. Each adult a baby interacts with has a different smell, look, touch, and voice. Some transitions occur because of a change in the environment, such as lighting and temperature. Other transitions are related to routines, such as feeding, diaper changing, and napping.

Can Do What You

• Transitions are easier for your baby when you plan for them. Sing to announce a change of activity or say your baby’s name to announce your presence. Smooth transitions are dependent on making sure your baby knows what is going to happen next. • Always give a warning when picking up your baby. With a young infant, say her name and leave your hands in place under her for a few seconds before lifting her. With a mobile infant, say her name, make eye contact, and wait a couple of seconds before lifting her. • Bring a special toy or blanket to school to help your baby connect home and school. • Don’t rush! Move slowly around your baby to avoid startling him and causing him stress. • Stay a little while when dropping off your baby at school. This allows her time to adjust. • Maintain routines as much as possible. Your baby depends on routines to know what is coming next.

Diaper Changing Time Good Morning (Tune: London Bridge is Falling Down) Good morning to you! Now it’s time to change your diaper. Good morning to you! Change your diaper. Change your diaper. With eyes open wide Now it’s time to change your diaper. And me by your side My sweet baby! Good morning to you. Now what shall we do?

8 g Trust Developin

Dear Parents, During the first year of life, babies are learning about their surroundings and their place in these surroundings. They are attempting to figure out how the world works:Can I make interesting things happen? Are people caring? Do my accomplishments matter? What draws people to me? Is there someone I can trust to help me and teach me? The answers to these questions come from a baby’s experiences and lay the foundation for future learning. Your actions and reactions, your words, your responses, your voice, and your celebrations of a baby’s accomplishments will all contribute to his sense of self. Right from birth, babies need to know that they can cause good things to happen on a predictable basis. They need to know that when they cry you will come to their aid, when they are hungry you will be there with food, and when they are sick you will help them feel better. During the first year of life, you cannot spoil a baby! If there is one significant person there to meet a baby’s needs on a predictable basis, the baby will develop trust. Trust is critical. It is the foundation of emotional intelligence and it also fuels curiosity which promotes exploration and learning.

Can Do What You

• Be present for your baby. Make sure he knows you are there for him. Acknowledge his call for attention. If you are busy, let your baby know you are coming shortly. • Being available to your baby does not mean that he never experiences the world alone. Babies need to learn to fall asleep on their own. They need to learn to calm themselves. They need to learn to entertain themselves. You can help your child learn these things by letting him know you are close by. For example, when helping your baby learn to fall asleep on his own, make sure he is dry, fed, and ready for sleep and then put him in bed. If he fusses, go to the door every five minutes or so, and let him know you are there and that you have confidence he will succeed in falling asleep. If he fusses longer than 20 minutes, pick your baby up and re-evaluate the situation. • Celebrate your baby’s accomplishments. • Respond to your baby’s curiosity. This is just as important as feeding and diapering. Provide toys with interesting buttons and sounds. Talk about the objects your child points to and allow him to touch those objects when it is safe to do so. • You cannot spoil a baby but you can spoil a toddler. At 16 months, your child will begin to have an opinion and you will find that many times it is in opposition to yours. Your child needs to know there are limits. Don’t give in to fits.

rly Memory 9 Understanding Ea

Dear Parents, As adults, our memory is dependent on our knowledge of language, labels, visual organizers, and the context of time and space. Infants do not have any of these tools. Their memory focuses on sensory sensations. A baby’s memory is not yet fully understood by science but it appears to be more connected to people, preferences, and feelings especially during the first two years of life. There are three widely accepted theories as to why infants don’t appear to retain early experiences as memories as we know them: • Memories are not accompanied by repetition (recall) and therefore are not strong enough to be retained. • Memories prior to language are coded differently and not available for later recall. • Content memories are not significant during the first couple of years. The focus of the brain during these years is on setting up the tools that will be used for organizing information in the future when content will become important.

Can Do What You

• There is no scientific evidence that anything parents do in the early years in the way of formally “teaching” their child will result in early memory. Instead it is recommended that you offer an environment that is safe and provides plenty of experiences for building an understanding of how the world operates. This environment includes a caring adult to help guide learning. • Offer your child toys with familiar components. Infants prefer things that are familiar, such as familiar people, toys, and surroundings. They are more likely to approach a toy if there is an element of familiarity to it. For example, they will reach for a new rattle when it is shaken to produce a familiar sound. • If your child is in childcare, make sure you have selected an environment where children are engaged by caring adults. • Repeat activities with your baby often. Repetition increases the strength of wiring connections children make when experiencing a new activity or learning a new skill. • Take photos of your baby and show them to him often over time. • Enjoy every minute of your child’s beginning years. If you store the memories, you can share them with your child later. Little ones often ask us to share our memories: When did I walk? What was my first word? What is something funny I said or did? Frog Street Infant © 2015 Frog Street Press

10 our Baby Calming Y

Dear Parents, Though it may not seem possible, young infants do experience stress. Babies are sensitive to the stress adults feel and their own experiences can generate stressful feelings. For example, babies experience stress when their needs are not met. They cry when they are hungry, overly tired, need to be changed, or when they are getting too much or too little attention. Not attending to a crying baby can cause the baby to feel stress. Babies also experience stress because they are constantly subjected to things and situations they have never encountered. Babies are not born knowing how to handle their stress. They are still developing their understanding of how the world operates and how they fit into this new environment. You can help reduce stress for your baby and help her learn how to handle her stress better.

Can Do What You

• Tend to your baby quickly when she cries. Babies who are responded to quickly tend to cry less and therefore are less stressed. • Keep your newborn baby swaddled. • If your baby is feeling stressed, hold her close and breathe deeply. She will eventually regulate her breathing to match yours. Some babies respond to the feel of their bare skin on your bare skin. • Teach your older infant how to take a deep breath by asking him to pretend to smell a flower (breathe in through nose) and then blow out a candle (exhale through mouth). • Bath your stressed baby in warm water. • Try cuddling and gently rocking your baby when she is feeling stressed. Try adding more comfort by making a swooshing sound. • Be careful not to overstimulate your baby. Shield her from bright lights, cool temperatures, fragrances, and loud noises.

11 motional Growt Encouraging Healthy E h

Dear Parents, Emotional intelligence includes the ability to recognize and manage one’s emotions. Babies, as early as one month old, display emotions that indicate they are keenly aware of what is happening around them. By four months, babies recognize differences in facial expressions (happy, sad, no expression). When babies are content they are more alert, attentive and responsive. Around 16 months, a toddler’s “sense of self” emerges. Toddlers begin to understand they have feelings and emotions that are separate from others. They begin to express their opinions. We often see this in the form of a tantrum. It is at this point that children’s emotional repertoire grows to include self-consciousness, pride, shame, and embarrassment. These more complex emotions show the connection between thinking and feeling. It is at this point that little ones are ready for adults to coach them during emotional moments. This is called emotional coaching.

Can Do What You

• According to Dr. John Gottman, author of Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, there are five steps to helping children learn to handle their emotions. 1. Be aware of emotions, both yours and your child’s. 2. Connect with your child. Encourage your child to talk about his emotions.

3. Listen to your child without judgment. HAPPY 4. Help your child name the emotion he is feeling.

5. Help your child find a solution to what he is feeling.

• Value your child’s range of feelings including not only the positive ones (happiness, surprise, calm) but also the negative ones (anger, fear, jealousy, disappointment). • Be a good role model by handling your emotions in a healthy way. • Show empathy for others and for your child. • Look at things from your child’s point of view. If he is sad about a broken toy, don’t tell him it is silly or that it is only a toy. SAD • For more information on emotional coaching read Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child by Dr. Gottman, Pride and Joy by Kenneth Barish or Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman. Frog Street Infant © 2015 Frog Street Press

uage Skills 12 Encouraging Lang

Dear Parents, Babies begin to hear sounds during the fifth month in the womb. In fact, if mom speaks often during the last trimester of her pregnancy, she will be rewarded by her baby recognizing her voice at birth! This early introduction to speaking lays a foundation for language. Babies pay attention when you speak to them. They are watching the shape of your mouth and the movement of your tongue. They are following the pitch of your voice. This is how they learn to speak. They cannot learn to speak by listening to TV or radio or a recording. They have to have face-to-face contact. The more we read, speak and sing to little ones, the better sound discrimination they develop and the bigger vocabulary they build. Little ones who are surrounded by language during the first 18 months of life will have vocabularies that are 185 words larger than a peer who was not surrounded by language. By age 2, this vocabulary will grow to 295 more words than their peers.

Can Do What You

• Read to your baby before she is born. Continue reading to her after she is born. • Sing to your baby often. • Talk to baby even though you know she does not yet understand you. Narrate your actions. Discuss your thoughts. Describe things you see. • Speak to your child from across the room and speak to her face to face. Make a point to speak to her daily with eye contact about 12 inches from her face. • Check with the doctor if your baby appears to have allergies. Nasal congestion can impact the inner ear and your baby’s ability to hear sounds clearly. • Recite nursery rhymes that you recall from your own childhood or memorize some that are new to use and say them to your baby. • Teach your baby sign language when she is 8 months old. Sign language increases language. It is also wired on both sides of the brain which leads to faster processing of information.

itive Skills 13 Encouraging Cogn

Dear Parents, Right from birth a baby is forging neural wiring for physical movement, social interactions, emotional control, language, and cognition (sometimes referred to as intelligence or thinking skills). Parents are often concerned about intelligence. They assume all the other areas of development will, more or less, take care of themselves. This is a bit of a misunderstanding. All of these areas are interwoven and all are equally dependent on experiences. Understanding cause-and-effect relationships is the foundation of cognitive development (intelligence) but it will be developed through experiences that are social, linguistic, emotional, and physical. Here are some cause-and-effect scenarios that involve all areas of development: • Socially your baby learns that if he smiles, you will smile back and if he cries, you will come to his aid. • Physically he learns that if he pushes with one of his hands when on his tummy, he will be able to roll to his back. • Linguistically he learns that language is “give and take.” He coos and then he stops and waits for you to speak. When you finish speaking, he coos again. Problem-solving skills are also a part of cognitive development. These skills begin to wire during the first year. Babies learn to push with one hand to turn over or to wiggle to reach a desired toy. A child’s intelligence is shaped and influenced by cumulative experiences over time. Your interactions to nurture your child’s intellectual development will have a lasting impact.

Can Do What You

• Talk about patterns with your little one. Point out changes in seasons, visible differences in day and night, routines, rhyme and repetition in songs, and rhythm in music. • Point out cause-and-effect events and situations. Cause and effect is a constant pattern in our lives. • Encourage your child’s natural abilities (music, art, dance, language, math). There are many ways to be “smart.” • Observe your child as she plays. Watch as she attempts to solve problems. Let her get as far as she can before jumping in to help. Your child needs to solve problems on her own. It is experience that wires the brain. • Talk to your child. The more words we have, the better we understand the world around us.

otor Skills 14 Encouraging M

Dear Parents, The foundation for motor development (large muscle control) is wired during the first two years of life. Babies move from having no control over their movements to having enough control, balance and coordination to walk. The brain wires this important circuitry through experience. Little ones need to be active. The more they move, the more agile, coordinated, and strong they become. Limit the time little ones are restrained. Research indicates that children today spend more time restrained than they did in previous decades. Physical growth cannot develop when little ones are restrained. Can Do What You

Non-Mobile Infants Mobile Infants • Provide open floor space. Any time your baby is • Crawl with your baby. It makes it more fun! not sleeping, she should be on the floor in a safe space. Floor space allows her to wiggle and move • Cut the sides from medium-size boxes to create more freely. tunnels for your baby to crawl through. Place a blanket over a table to create another type • Exercise your infant’s arms and legs during floor of tunnel. time. Help your baby roll from tummy to back and then back to tummy. • Teach your little one simple exercises. Make it a routine to exercise together daily. • Provide tummy time. Prop your baby on your tummy. Encourage him to lift his head by talking • Provide riding toys and push toys. to him. • Place a blanket on the grass outdoors and invite • Sit your baby in your lap and hold her hands. your child to roll back and forth across the Encourage her to stand up. blanket. • Suspend an empty paper towel tube from • Take your child to the park. Encourage him your baby’s mobile. to swing (develops balance) and climb (develops Encourage him to muscles). swing at the tube. • Play movement games:

Musical Freeze: Play music and dance. When the music stops encourage your little one to hold a pose.

Cat and Mouse: You be the cat that chases a

mouse (your child).

Animal Antics: Move like an elephant, a fish, a butterfly and other interesting animals.

Chasing Bubbles: Blow bubbles and invite your child to chase them.

ial Skills 15 Developing Soc

Dear Parents, Social intelligence, sometimes referred to as social development, is important for both survival and for living a fulfilling life. Social skills are necessary for relating to others, learning from others, and teaching others. You might think of these skills as “people skills.” Our acceptance by others is largely based on our social intelligence (expressing our thoughts, showing concern for others, solving and preventing problems, cooperating). Social skills are vital to a child’s success in school. Social interactions and understanding begin to wire right from birth. During the first year of life, babies connect with the people who care for them (parents and outside-the-home caregivers). It is these connections that anchor a baby’s developing social skills. This is called attachment. Providing a loving and supportive environment goes a long way in preparing a baby to interact socially. Social skills are optimally developed when intentionally taught. Emotional intelligence and social intelligence are co-dependent. Emotional intelligence is the understanding of one’s own emotions and the ability to manage these emotions effectively. Social intelligence is the understanding of others’ emotions (and feelings) and the ability to manage one’s self in the context of others. Emotional intelligence builds the foundation for social intelligence. As we understand ourselves, we gain insight into understanding others.

Can Do What You

• Interact with your baby daily. Talk to him. Smile at him. Be expressive and acknowledge his expressions. • When you play interactive games, alternate taking turns. For example, when playing Peek-a-Boo, cover your eyes a few times and then cover your baby’s eyes a few times. • Typically around 8 months, babies develop a fear of strangers. If your child expresses this type of fear, do not force him to go to a stranger. • When other babies are around, position your baby so he can see his peers. • When your baby begins to express his wants and desires through tantrums (between 15 and 18 months), set limits and hold to them. It is during this time that your child is learning an important rule of social living: You don’t always get your way. • Talk with older infants about the feelings of their friends. Teach them to touch others gently.

Communication 16 Using Sign Language for

Dear Parents, At around 8 months, babies understand about 80% of what we say to them. Understanding the meaning of words is called receptive language. When babies begin to speak words, they are using expressive language. The understanding of words signals the appropriate time to teach little ones sign language. Sign language will provide a communication bridge between babies’ understanding of language and their ability to speak. It will allow them to let others know when they want something or when they have had enough of something. It will help them communicate with their peers which in turn will help with squabbles that occur because of children’s inability to let others know what they are trying to communicate. Most languages are stored on one side of the brain. For example, English and Spanish are stored on the left side of the brain while many Asian languages are stored on the right side of the brain. But sign language is stored on both sides of the brain which is a big advantage for processing information.

Can Do What You

Teach your baby sign language beginning at 8 months. Be patient. Give her time to figure out that the hand movements you are using represent words. It generally takes several weeks for little ones to catch on. Always say the word when you make the sign. This is what allows the wiring for sign language to encompass both hemispheres.

mommy daddy more eat

drink all done play I want

Routines 17 Sticking with

Dear Parents, Routines are what little ones use to tell time. They know that mommy picks them up after their afternoon nap. They know that bedtime follows bath time or story time. Routines help babies feel secure and in control. When routines are broken, babies can become frustrated 12 and irritable. They don’t know what to expect. Their 11 1 world has taken a turn and they don’t know why. Things 10 become chaotic. Think about how you feel when you 2 forget to wear your watch, leave your cell phone at 9 home, or have house guests changing up your normal 3 routine. While as adults we have learned to compensate 8 for the unexpected, little ones have not yet learned to 4 do this. They need the comfort of the familiar and the 7 consistency of patterns they know and understand. 6 5

Can Do What You

• Create routines right from the beginning. Without routines, your baby’s world feels random and overwhelming. • Pay attention to your baby’s cues as you set routines. You will know when your baby is hungry because she will most likely move her mouth in a smacking movement or chew her hands. You will know when the best time is for play time because your baby will be fully alert. You will know when it is time to sleep because your baby will rub her eyes and have trouble maintaining eye contact. • Maintain routines as much as possible but don’t panic when routines get interrupted or broken on occasion. • When the unexpected happens, understand that your baby may show concern. Try to build in as much consistency as possible. For example, if bedtime gets off schedule, try to keep other routines associated with it intact, such as reading a story or having a snack. • Build routines around the important parts of your baby’s day. For example, naptime may include a few moments of rocking before going into the crib or perhaps a few minutes of lullaby music. Potty time may include a book to look through and a big hug when successful. Saying good-bye at school might include a hug, a few words about your return and a wave goodbye. Each of the components of a routine will help your baby through the activity. • When visiting away from home, make sure to take the components of your routines with you. When the surroundings are different, the activities can help maintain consistency.

ntrums 18 Handling Ta

Dear Parents, Children between 14 and 18 months are at a developmental stage when they are testing limits. They have an opinion and are anxious to make it heard. It is important to set limits and make sure children stay within those limits. Children need to learn that “no” means no. Because the brain wires from experiences, it is critical that you set and hold boundaries during this time. If you are wishy-washy, your child will not have any sense of limits and without understanding limits, your child cannot develop self-control.

Can Do What You

• When you say “no,” mean it even if you rethink your decision. Babies are too young to understand your rationale for changing a decision. They assume their tantrum has changed your mind and this reinforces the opposite of what you want (self-control). • Discuss rules with all members of your family (spouse, grandparent, siblings) so that everyone will reinforce the same restrictions. • Be consistent. For example, if food is not allowed in some areas of the home, make this a consistent rule in all cases, including a rule for other people in your home. Consistency over time helps children understand boundaries and, believe it or not, your child needs and wants boundaries.

Follow these simple steps when a tantrum occurs. 1. Put into simple words what you believe the problem is. Many tantrums escalate because children don’t think we understand what they want. 2. Move on with your task. Let your child cry it out. 3. When your child is calm, briefly explain why she couldn’t have her way.

in the Car 19 Keeping Peace

Dear Parents, It is frustrating and disconcerting when little ones choose to cry in the car. It makes it extremely difficult to concentrate on driving. Little ones cry in the car for many different reasons. A few of these reasons might include not being able to see you, not liking being strapped into a seat, being hungry, and even in some cases being uncomfortable with the movement of the car. Some babies cry every time they are in the car. Try some of the suggestions below but do not give too much attention to this frustrating behavior. If crying persists over time, talk to your pediatrician.

Can Do What You

• Make sure your baby is comfortable. Ensure that car seat straps are safe but not too tight. Make sure clothing is not bunched up under your child. • Ensure that air vents are not blowing directly on your baby. • Swaddle your newborn (up to 3 months). This helps your baby feel secure. • Talk and sing to your baby. • Play a music CD. Use lullaby music if it is okay if your baby falls asleep. Otherwise use a CD that contains traditional songs like “Itsy Bitsy Spider” and “The Wheels on the Bus.” • Make a CD of you singing to play in the car. • Provide toys for your baby. • Provide snacks for older children. Make sure that snacks are safe and not a choking hazard. • Copy photos of family members and encase them in clear self-adhesive paper or laminate them. Tape the photos in a place (side window, back of driver seat, back of back seat) that your baby can see them. • Place a mirror where your baby can see himself. • Some babies need to be calmed instead of entertained. Provide a stuffed animal that plays ocean wave sounds or has a heartbeat sound. • If your car trip is longer than 20 minutes, avoid using a DVD to entertain your baby. The American Pediatric Association and The American Medical Association both recommend no use of two-dimensional imagery (computer screens, phone screens, television) with children beneath the age of two because it interferes with your baby’s visual wiring.

ploration 20 Encouraging Ex

Dear Parents, Children are born curious and capable of generating solutions to problems. They have a reverence for everything and a profound drive to explore and discover. You have probably observed a young child, intent on reaching for a toy, try various strategies until she gets what she wants. It is this innate curiosity that drives exploration. Exploration is the heart of learning and the key to building a baby’s cognitive (thinking) skills. It is exploration (driven by curiosity) that uncovers the relationship between cause and effect, the joy of learning, the pride of accomplishment that accompanies creativity, and the self-confidence that blooms with solving problems. It is crucial to encourage a baby’s natural curiosity. When it is stifled, babies will become dependent on adult approval and less likely to have enough confidence to explore alone. The critical steps involved in trial-and-error learning will begin to be extinguished.

Can Do What You

• Child proof your home so that you do not find yourself saying “no” to your baby as she explores. • Allow your baby to explore when she is awake. The only time your baby belongs in her crib is for sleeping. • Avoid keeping your baby confined to feeding tables, swings, walkers, and carriers. Little ones can’t explore when they are confined. • Offer your child interesting things that will encourage her to look (photos, bird’s nest, tree bark, shells) and listen (musical toys, baby band instruments, squeak toys). Always make sure that items you provide are safe (large enough not to swallow or to break). • Talk with your baby when you see her show interest in something. • Take your baby on a nature walk or stroller ride often. Talk about the things you see. Direct your baby’s attention to interesting things you see. • Organized problem-solving strategies (experimentation with the goal of finding a solution) begin to wire when toddlers are around 18 months old. In preparation for this stage, offer your young infant activities that stimulate his natural ability to think critically and creatively. Model problem-solving strategies and discuss your thinking as you work through problems. It takes firsthand experience and a great deal of practice for this process to become second nature for a young child.

Present 21 Being Fully

Dear Parents, Oral communication is a two-way street that involves both listening and speaking. Listening is as important as speaking. In today’s busy world, it is easy to give superficial attention to a child’s questions and comments. If this becomes the norm, children may feel their thoughts are unimportant. This inhibits their self-confidence and self-esteem. When you listen with interest to your child and respond constructively, it helps your child learn that his thoughts and comments are valid and respected. When you are “fully present” with your child, he feels he is the most important person in your world. This feeling helps build both self-esteem and communication skills. Being “fully present” extends beyond communication. It also means spending quality, uninterrupted time with your child. Being with your child is not a time for multi-tasking.

Can Do What You

• Stop what you are doing and listen to your child when she speaks. This doesn’t have to happen 100% of the time, but it does need to happen the majority of the time. • When listening to your child, make eye contact and encourage your child to do the same. • When you are busy, tell your child that you need a few minutes. Get back to him as soon as possible. • Take time each day to spend quality time with your child. During this special time, ignore all other things that might take your attention away from your child (cell phone, other people, contemplating a to-do list). Try planning a specific time each day for this uninterrupted time with your child to ensure that it happens. • Always make bedtime a time that you slow down. Putting your little one down for the night should be a special time. Create a routine. With a younger baby, that routine might be a feeding before going down for the night. For an older baby, it might be a bath followed by a story time.

22 ith Technolog Limit Interaction w y

Dear Parents, A baby’s vision is rapidly wiring during the first two years of life. Babies need to experience a colorful world of three-dimensional objects. This is why the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no technology screens for children under two. Babies are born with rudimentary wiring for vision. They see objects that are 9-14 inches away from their face and they see them in only black, white, and shades of gray. They do not have depth perception. But dramatic changes happen in the first two years of life! A baby’s vision distance will extend. Babies will begin to see colors and develop depth perception. By age 2, children will have 20/20 vision. This dramatic wiring of vision is why neuroscience researchers, doctors, and child development experts believe that during the first two years of life babies should be surrounded by the natural things in their environment. Their brains are wiring for the three-dimensional world in which they live. Technology screens (computers, TV, cell phones) are two-dimensional. Too much time spent looking at these screens confuses the wiring that is being forged. Researchers, pediatricians, and child development experts further believe that babies need to be moving and exploring the world around them as vision is not the only thing wiring during the first two years. A baby’s brain is laying the foundation for physical, social, emotional, cognitive, and language development.

Can Do What You

• Limit use of television and computer screens. Although researchers and doctors recommend no use of technology screens, it is really about not abusing the use of these items. Fifteen minutes a day will not harm your baby’s vision. • Instead of technology screens, provide your baby with books, colorful toys, and opportunities to move and explore. These things help optimize the development of your baby’s brain and are much more important in the early years than anything technology screens can offer. • Your baby’s favorite thing to look at is your face! Make eye contact with your baby when you talk to him. Smile often. Make funny faces. Play games that involve the face, such as “Where is Baby’s Nose?” and “Peek-a-Boo.” • As your baby grows, keep technology screen time in check. Researchers agree that two hours a day should be a limit for preschool and elementary age children. Every hour spent with technology reduces face-to-face interactions with people by 30 minutes. It is face-to-face interaction with people that helps the brain wire for social skills.

23 y Eating Habit Encouraging Health s

Dear Parents, Maximum brain function is dependent on good nutrition. Protein is the number one brain food. It is critical to alertness, attention, and thinking. The brain functions best when a diet includes protein, selenium (seafood and whole-grain breads and cereals), boron (broccoli, apples, peaches, and grapes), folic acid (green leafy vegetables, beef, liver, and beans), zinc (fish, beans, grains), and vitamin B. All of these vitamins and nutrients are more effective when obtained from a natural source instead of a supplement. Research shows that a nibbling diet, six small meals a day, has more advantages to brain function than a traditional three-meals-a-day diet. Both thinking and behavior are enhanced. This is perfect for toddlers who much prefer to eat smaller portions more frequently. Follow the cues of your little one rather than a predetermined schedule. Children have an internal sense of what works best for them.

Can Do What You

• Enjoy feeding time. Talk to your baby while she is eating. Children will eat more slowly and will be more likely to experiment with eating new foods. This is also a good time to model manners for older children. • Take cues from your baby. Little ones do an incredibly effective job of self-regulating. They will let you know when they are hungry (chewing fist, crying) and will also let you know when they are finished eating (turning head away, refusing to open mouth). • When spoon feeding, let your baby see the food on the spoon. Hold the spoon 10-12 inches away from her face. (No one likes to have something they can’t see shoved into their face.) Wait for your baby to show signs of readiness, such as parting the lips or opening the mouth. Don’t rush feeding. • Occasionally serve finger foods (small slices of ripe bananas, wheat cereals, finger sausages, fish sticks). Not using a spoon makes eating so much easier. • Use a red placemat or red plate for a picky eater. The color red has been shown to enhance appetite. • Move your baby’s feeding table on occasion. A new view is inspiring to everyone and novelty is a big winner when it comes to paying attention. • Provide healthy snacks. Balance protein with complex carbohydrates. Try serving toasted oat cereal, small pieces of ripe fruit without seeds or skin, small pieces of well-cooked vegetables such as carrots and squash, and small pieces of soft cheese served one bite at a time.

our Baby 24 Reading to Y

Dear Parents, Reading to babies during the early years is credited with helping them learn to speak, enjoy reading for a lifetime, and develop vocabulary. A reading voice and a singing voice sound different from a speaking voice. Each of these ways of communicating are important for helping children learn the sounds, intonations, and nuances of language. The size of a child’s vocabulary is considered by most researchers to be a reliable predictor of a child’s reading success. Babies who are sung to, spoken to, and read to during the first 18 months of life will have a vocabulary that consists of 185 more words than that of a peer who was not provided these rich language experiences. This gap is difficult to extinguish and many researchers believe children with poor language starts will never catch up with their peers. We do know that children who enter kindergarten with rich language experiences will have 1,500 more words than a peer without this background. This number represents about half of the vocabulary most five year olds possess.

Can Do What You

• Read to your child daily. Make it a routine. It may be part of your bedtime or bath time ritual. It doesn’t matter when it happens. It matters that it happens. • Read the same book several times. Your baby will learn a little more about the story and illustrations each time she hears your read it. • Make books available to your baby. Board books and cloth books are both made to stand the harsh treatment they receive while a young child is learning how to handle them properly. • When your baby is around 9 months, begin moving your finger below the words as you read. This helps your child understand that words make up the story and that words are made up of letters. • Make reading time pleasant. Use this as a time to snuggle with your little one. • Allow older babies to help turn the pages. They usually show an interest in doing this at around 12 months. • When books aren’t available, tell your baby a story. Recite a story from your childhood or just make up a new story. If you make up a new story, insert your baby’s name for a special delight! • Let your baby see you reading. This helps demonstrate the many purposes of reading. Learning to read is part mechanics (learning letter sounds and sight words) and it is part disposition (the desire to read). Demonstrating all the many ways that reading helps you, encourages your baby’s desire.