“Once Again, Jack Myers Has His Fingers on the Pulse of the Very Latest. Myers Has Clearly Done His Homework, and the Result I
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“Once again, Jack Myers has his fingers on the pulse of the very latest. Myers has clearly done his homework, and the result is this superb book.” —Ken Burns, documentary filmmaker of The Roosevelts and The Civil War “In his groundbreaking book, Jack Myers challenges the existing role models on whom men base their male identity, opening the door to a new conversation about masculinity. It is a must-read.” —Dr. Jane Greer, author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness from Ruining Your Relationship “Jack Myers is a media visionary, and—once again—he’s asking a big, hairy, and contentious question: What is the future of men? While for many this is still a man’s world, Myers shines a light of skepticism on this notion and points us to a much different future. How will gender equality—or a shift in balance—change the landscape? The Future of Men’s answers will surprise and delight you.” —Mitch Joel, author of Six Pixels of Separation “‘Girls rule! Girls rock! You go, Girl!’ Great, if you’re a girl, but where does that leave the boys? Jack Myers’s book The Future of Men should be required reading for every parent rearing sons.” —Contessa Brewer, anchor and correspondent for NBC and MSNBC “Jack Myers envisions a better day when masculine strength is defined by empathy and sensitivity instead of the macho, often sexist, attitudes and behaviors of the past.” —Keith Reinhard, chairman emeritus of DDB Worldwide Communications Group “Jack Myers has proven over and over again that he has an eye for the trends that drive our culture and our industry. Now Jack, a Mad Men admirer from the start, tackles head-on the future of (all) men.” —Charlie Collier, president of AMC and SundanceTV “I’ve studied boomers and the age wave for the past three decades; however, I also recognize the need to focus on younger generations, especially on the changing dynamics of gender relationships. In The Future of Men, Jack Myers confronts changing realities in society, cul- ture, business, and more.” —Ken Dychtwald, PhD, author of A New Purpose: Redefining Money, Work, Retirement, and Success “Jack Myers has done it again. This time he delves deeply into the cur- rent and future status of masculinity and what it will mean to ‘be a man’ in the decades ahead. The current fundamental recasting of gen- der roles is one of the most profound dynamics in the world today.” —David Houle, futurist, EvolutionShift.com “Learn what it takes to be a real man. Whether you eat quiche or not, this book is a must-read!” —Jeffrey Hayzlett, TV and radio host, speaker, author, and chairman of C-Suite Network “It’s no secret that gender roles are blurring, but discussion on the future of this evolutionary change has been minimal. The Future of Men is the guide we’ve needed to walk us through this shift from the macho man to the modern man.” —Sydney N. Fulkerson, author of The Coffee Run: And Other Internship Need-to-Knows “From a world that worships the image rather than the reality, Myers tells us to ignore the images that have defined men in the past and instead embrace our sensitivity and become more empathetic. He’s got to be good to pull this off! He is.” —Larry Kramer, former president and publisher of USA Today “For years, in my work advising consumer marketers and the agen- cies that support them, I have looked to Jack Myers for insights on the media ecology and the consuming culture that feeds it. He has a way of packaging his cultural insights to directly assist the reader in business and in life at large.” —Kendall Allen, principal of Influence Collective OTHER BOOKS BY JACK MYERS Adbashing: Surviving the Attacks on Advertising, American Media Council, 1993 Reconnecting with Customers: Building Brands and Profits in The Relationship Age, Spurge Ink! / Knowledge Exchange, 1998 Virtual Worlds: Rewiring Your Emotional Connections, Myers Publishing LLC, 2007 Hooked Up: A New Generation’s Surprising Take on Sex, Politics and Saving the World, York House Press, 2012 INKSHARES INKSHARES Globally, and especially in Western cultures, we are in the midst of what may prove to be the greatest societal transformation in the history of humanity: the transformation from male to female dominance. Copyright © 2016 Jack Myers All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher. Published by Inkshares, Inc., San Francisco, California www.inkshares.com Edited and designed by Girl Friday Productions www.girlfridayproductions.com Cover design by Erick Montes ISBN: 978-1-9417586-56 e-ISBN: 978-1-9417586-63 LCCN: 2015945416 First edition Printed in the United States of America Dedicated to the idea that people of all genders and all nations will reach the common conclusion that we are all equal in God’s eyes, and due equal rights, equal honesty, equal opportunity, equal accountability for our actions, and equal pursuit of happiness. There is no male counterpart to sisterhood. With gratitude to all those who supported and contributed to my personal growth as I wrote this book And with great love for my children and grandchildren and future generations with whom I share this as my legacy CONTENTS Why I Wrote This Book. 1 MEN: PAST AND PRESENT Chapter 1. Are Even the Good Ones Bad? . 5 Chapter 2. The Future of Men: Just the Facts. 9 Women Take Control of Earning Power . 12 How Are Men Faring in the Modern Workplace? . 14 Changing Management Characteristics Favor Female Ascendency. 20 Shattering the Glass Ceiling? . 24 Chapter 3. Men: Confused, Challenged, Conflicted . 27 Chapter 4. The Age of the Dominant Male Has Passed . 31 Chapter 5. Deny, Deny, Deny: Men’s Destructive Instinct to Lie . 35 Chapter 6. Men and Personal Intimacy Disorder . 45 Chapter 7. Sex Sells and So Do Moronic Men . 51 Sexuality in Fashion Advertising . 53 The Idiot Man in Advertising . 55 The Super Bowl That Cared. 56 A Culture of Emasculation . 58 The Beer Commercial: A Barometer for Sexism . 59 The Shifting Demographic: Women-Friendly Beer Ads. 62 The Sexualization of Men . 67 Diversity in Marketing . 70 Chapter 8. Eyes Wide Open: A New Sexual Revolution . 73 Sexually Empowered Women . 73 Men, Women, and Communication . 76 Technology, Online Dating, and the Decay of Intimacy. 80 Online Dating and Hook-up Sites . 81 Chapter 9. Women Take Control in the Bedroom . 89 Shifting Standards for Explicit Material . 89 The Evolution of Cultural Gender Roles . 92 What Women Want: Sex and Expectations . 97 Chapter 10. Sisters Going Their Own Way. 101 Chapter 11. Heterosexual Women and Gay Men: The New Relationship . 109 TV AND MEDIA: REFLECTING CHANGE, LEADING CHANGE Chapter 12. Will & Grace: The TV Series That Changed America. 115 Will & Grace: Before and After . 117 Chapter 13. The Medium Is the Man . 123 Chapter 14. Nerds and Geeks: The New “Real Men” . 137 Chapter 15. News Anchors Reflecting Societal Shifts . 141 Chapter 16. TV Feminists: Leading or Following Society? . 145 GENDER CONVERGENCE AND WOMEN’S STRUGGLES Chapter 17. Gender Convergence . 151 Hollywood’s Stay-at-Home Dads . 153 Millennial Women: Doing It All . 155 Rise of the Cooking Dad . 157 Coparenting . 158 Counterintuitive Trends . 159 The Corporate Imperative . 160 Chapter 18. Women’s Struggle for Ascendance. 163 Struggles in the Workplace . 164 Men’s Role in Women’s Success . 166 Rape, Idiot Politicians, and the War on Women . 167 Sex, Violence, and Dominance . 168 Rape Culture and School Cover-ups . 170 Human Trafficking and Sex Work . 171 Relationships, Fidelity, and Honesty . 173 Hopes and Expectations in Relationships. 174 Women Ascendant . 174 MEN, WOMEN, AND POWER: THE NEW REALITY Chapter 19. Men Are Now the Undereducated Gender . 179 The Myth of Higher Pay for the Educated. 184 Women: The New Educated Gender . 186 Chapter 20. Politics and the Slowly Shifting Sands of Time . 189 Female Politicians in the Media . 193 Male Opposition: The Good Ol’ Boys Club . 196 The War on Women . 198 The Turning Tides: Women in Politics . 205 Women Fight Back . 207 Female Role Models in Politics . 210 Chapter 21. How Men Can Adapt to the New World . 215 Learn to Multitask. 216 Admit Mistakes and Tell the Truth . 218 Learn to Ask for Help . 219 Pay Attention to Details . 221 Show Concern for Coworkers. 221 Use More Words to Communicate, and Think About Other People’s Feelings . 222 Chapter 22. The Future of Men (and Women) Globally . 223 Women’s Ascendance in Education . 224 Workforce Participation . 227 Women’s Rights and “Brain Drain” . 228 Political Empowerment . 229 Women’s Concerns: the Best, the Worst, and the Exceptionally Dangerous . 231 STORIES FROM A WOMAN’S HEART Chapter 23. Reality from a Female Point of View . 237 Chapter 24. Lara’s Story: It’s No Longer a Male-Dominated World . 239 Chapter 25. Nicky’s Story, as Told by His Mom: What Are We Teaching Our Sons? . 243 Chapter 26. Michelle’s Story: Being a Perfect 1950s Girl . in the 1990s . 247 Chapter 27. Ava’s Story: Communication Versus Confrontation . 251 Chapter 28. Tina’s Story: You Can’t Change a Man . 253 Chapter 29. Mary M.’s Story: Hey, Man, It’s Not All About You. 255 Chapter 30. Carol’s Story: Managing from a Woman’s Perspective . 263 Chapter 31. Lizz’s Story: Men Don’t Want Women Who Are Too Opinionated . 265 THE FUTURE OF MEN Chapter 32. What Can We Learn from the Last Matriarchal Tribe? .