February 2018 Vol 2 Issue 2 `150

Anuja Chauhan The bestselling author on mothering strategies and ‘trendy’ politics

egg donor diary valentine’s special off-reality tv It can be prolonged Love yourself? Eat healthy Karishma Kotak on and painful, but + How to be a ‘fair’ bride her Bigg Boss stint Arvinder did it for love + India’s Ministry of Sex and Twenty20 cricket Size: 148mm width x 210mm height

2 | PERSONAL GROWTH

WORLD LUXURY SPA AWARDS WINNER 2017

February 2018 contents

All Things Underfoot 06 Ishrat Sahgal makes carpets out of silk scraps

Home Grown 15 Renowned Jaipur architect Ritu Khandelwal

Smile Expert 18 Dental aesthetician Dr Ekta Chadha’s journey

Living by the Word ON THE COVER: Anuja Chauhan 20 Cover girl Anuja Chauhan on family and love PHOTOGRAPHY: Rohit Chawla Of Books and Luxuries 24 MBD’s ladyboss Monica Malhotra Kandhari

Thought Provoker 28 Author Kota Neelima on the female voice

Listening with Heart 31 Sonam Kejriwal’s heart-wrenching story

News Maker 34 TV anchor and product designer Sahar Zaman

Silk Route 46 Aanchal and Akshita Sagar’s label Harnessing Attitude Ohfab is reinventing Banarasis 48 Body-harness designer Anam Patel

February 2018 4 | editor’s note

Chronicling life

he importance of books cannot be overstat- ed. Besides their ability to inform, inspire, and create empathy, they are chronicles of our time. Cover personality Anuja Chau- han’sT novels capture modern-day preoccupations and dreams (p.20). Monica Malhotra Kandhari’s publishing house MBD has ignited the dreams of lakhs of students (p.24). Kota Neelima’s gritty fiction and non-fiction reflect a darker reality and give a voice to the voiceless (p.28). In her recently translated book Boys in Zinc, No- bel Prize winner Svetlana Alexievich asks, “What happens to great events? They migrate into history, while the little ones, the ones that are most import- ant for the little person, disappear without a trace.” It was this very thought that motivated me to launch eShe last year. While many publications Aekta Kapoor chronicle great events, I wanted to record the little Founder Editor, eShe ones, the ones that are important for the common person. The homemaker who becomes an egg do- nor for love (p.9). The hearing-impaired profes- sional in grief after her mother is murdered (p.31), or the student with a burdensome secret (p.40). These are the stories of our time. Let us capture them, lest they disappear without a trace.

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Editor: Aekta Kapoor All rights reserved throughout Vasant Vihar, New Delhi 110057, Contributors: Rohit Chawla, the world. Reproduction in any India. Phone: +91 9818166621. Anupam Dabral, Alka Mahajan, manner is prohibited. Editor: To buy, advertise or for any other Aekta Kapoor. Printed and queries, visit eshe.in or send an Hansa Makhijani Jain, Kaveri published by Aekta Kapoor email to mail@coralcontent. Jain, Kay Newton, Punya Arora, on behalf of the owner Coral com. To subscribe to the free Ranak Mann, Sana Hoda-Sood Content. Published at C3/1 GF, digital edition, visit eShe.in

February 2018 news | 5 AROUND THE WORLD

A spotlight on women in the news and news of interest to women

The Glorification of sati? The Karni Sena went on a rampage to stop its release, and then the Censor Board snipped its title. If that wasn’t enough, Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s Padmavat is now in the eye of another debate among moviegoers triggered by a critical review by actor Swara Bhaskar, who says he glorifies practices like jauhar in the film. What do you think?

The Fall of the funny guy In an anonymous writeup on a website, a young woman accused US-based actor-comedian Aziz Ansari of sexual misconduct. The piece triggered a global debate on the line between ‘coercion’ and ‘bad sex’. Are such outbursts the downside of the #MeToo movement to expose sexual predators in positions of power, some asked. On a productive note, it ignited discussion on gender power-play and sexism in the bedroom.

Pink for gender parity India’s Chief Economic Adviser Arvind Subramanian presented the Economic Survey 2018 document in a pink cover in a “bid to further the cause of women’s empowerment.” While Twitterati joked about it, the survey did make important points about social prejudices adversely affecting economic growth.

February 2018 6 | in the limelight

February 2018 in the limelight | 7 THERE ARE NO shortcuts From Bigg Boss to acting in movies to hosting TV shows for 20- 20 cricket, UK-born Karishma Kotak has made India her home, and has found her path in showbiz

n opportunity to model advertising circuit and in fashion for the Kingfisher Calen- magazines. This was later followed dar opened the path to the by a few film roles. But it was Bigg glamour world for Karish- Boss that really made her a house- Ama Kotak. Born and brought up hold name. in Northwest London to Indian It happened in the year 2012. parents who had their own busi- Though Karishma’s father was ail- ness, Karishma lived in India briefly when she went to a boarding school “work hard and in the hills. Later, she went back to London, and graduated with a de- master your craft gree in advertising and marketing. so that you’re She was just 20 when she moved to Mumbai, and within a couple ready when the of months, was cast as a swimsuit opportunity arises” model. There was no looking back. “I was a very confident, fearless girl,” says Karishma of her younger ing back in London, he convinced self. “You tread with more caution his daughter to take the offer to ap- once you’re older.” pear on the reality TV show in In- Soon, various modeling offers dia. She went for it, and later learnt came up – from skincare brands to she was repeatedly mentioned in the fashion and jewellery – and Kar- news for typical Bigg Boss preoccu- ishma became a known face in the pations such as not sharing her bed

February 2018 8 | in the limelight

with her fellow contestant Niketan House are after all normal people. Madhok, because it would make “It’s as real as it gets,” she admits. “I her mum uncomfortable. “Being in was in the House for 80 days, which the Bigg Boss house is like a course is a lot of time to be away from your in Vipassana meditation – you are life if you think about it.” cut away from the entire world and Soon after her reality TV experi- have no clue what is happening ence, Karishma was offered the role outside,” she says wryly. of TV show host for Indian Premier League 2013. She enjoyed the role, and it opened the gateway for her in live cricket reportage. “What I love about the 20-20 format is that anything can happen – it’s such a fun sport,” she laughs. Since then she has been TV anchor and live interviewer for many other cricket leagues, and this month she will an- chor the 2018 edition of Cricket on Ice Trophy Tournament in St Mori- tz, Switzerland. Not one for too much partying, the 35-year-old prefers to watch movies and cook dinner for friends to unwind. Fond of reading both fiction and non-fiction, she is also addicted to watching Netflix shows and keeps her iPad handy during her travels. She feels blessed to have the best of both her worlds – UK and India – and believes there are no shortcuts in life, especially for But then tragedy struck. Karish- women. “No matter where you ma had to make an unscheduled are in the world, success doesn’t exit a few weeks later when her come easy. You have to work hard father passed away. The experience and master your craft so that you’re was a challenge for her, both profes- ready when the opportunity aris- sionally and personally. Refusing to es,” she says, adding in a moment of qualify it as either positive or nega- candour: “I hope to be remembered tive, she says people in the Bigg Boss as kind and loyal.” 

February 2018 experience | 9 EGG

Would you become an egg donor even if the process is painful and there is nothing in it for you? This is one woman’s story By Arvinder Bhandoola

y mother was diagnosed motherapy had inflicted on her. with cancer when I was My father had come home briefly in class 10. As the young- from the hospital when he got a call est of four daughters liv- that she had already passed away. I Ming in a small town in Punjab, the saw him crying for the first time in reality of her impending death did my life. Wailing, my elder sister told not strike me at first. I took her for me my mother had died. I fainted. granted and treated her as an equal, I have been dogged by low teasing her about the wig that che- blood-pressure problems since then.

February 2018 10 | experience

As a teenager I was quiet and with me – would donate her eggs. lonely. I never celebrated my birth- “Why my sister?” I asked indig- day because it came close after my nantly. “I will do it for you!” mom’s death anniversary. I didn’t But I was 39 myself and the doc- find it easy to open up to people but tors were not in favour. I researched was very attached to my sisters. The for possible complications and eldest two got married and moved learnt about ovarian hyperstimula- away. The youngest two of us lived tion syndrome. In one of the sto- alone in Mohali as my father had ries I read online, an egg donor got moved to the Middle East. Life was crippled for life because of it. very insecure then, two girls with- But I kept all this information to out much income in a rough town, myself and told the doctors I want- but it made us stronger. I did my Master’s in child psy- chology from Punjab University. In 2005, I married a merchant-navy officer and moved to Delhi. We had a baby girl in 2010, and I made new friends in the city. Gradually, I over- came my grief of losing my mother, but there were still dark days when I felt worthless, depressed and alone. dear friend of mine, whom AI shall call Seema, was going through a trying patch in her life in the meantime. Her first marriage Arvinder with her husband Uday Bhandoola had lasted ten years but she had not been able to conceive, despite sev- ed to go ahead. Not once did my eral rounds of fertility treatments. husband or in-laws question me or Eventually, her husband had had stop me from doing this. Their sup- an affair with his colleague, and di- port was unconditional. vorced Seema, leaving her shattered. In November 2015, Seema’s and The second time she married, my menstrual cycles were coordi- she was in her late 30s. Once again, nated using medication; I had to the couple had difficulty conceiv- self-administer hormonal injections ing. She tried IVF treatments but for several days. After we both got nothing worked. She had crossed our period on the same day, another 40 when she tentatively asked me if set of injections was given to thick- my sister – who was single and lived en my endometrial lining. My pa-

February 2018 experience | 11 rameters, the doctors found to their I was going through a bad phase surprise, were absolutely fine and at that day, stricken with feelings of par with much younger women. low self-esteem, shouting at my For 13 days after menstruation, I daughter Izna for no reason. Then had to self-administer a painful in- Seema came over to give me her jection twice a day. But, somehow, good news. I cannot forget the look I never felt like I was doing this for on her face. When she saw me de- someone else. It felt like a calling. pressed, she said, “Do you know On the day of the egg retrieval, I what you have done for me? The was put through general anaesthesia next time you feel like this, think and, though it’s a 10-minute proce- of what you’ve done for me. No dure, I was in the operation theatre one would do this. That’s the kind

L-R: Arvinder with her husband and daughter Izna; with her three older sisters from 9 am to 3.30 pm. Later, the of person you are.” It was the great- doctors said they had retrieved nine est validation I have ever received in eggs, a very healthy number. After my entire life. keeping them overnight in a petri Seema had a normal pregnan- dish with Seema’s husband’s semen cy and a healthy full-term baby sample, eight of these got fertilized girl eighteen months ago. When I – again a good sign. first met the baby, she said, “This On the third day, doctors trans- is your daughter.” I replied, “No, I ferred two embryos to Seema’s want to dissociate myself from such womb, and froze three for future thoughts. She’s all yours.” use. A week later, her pregnancy test The little one will turn two this came back positive. year. We share the same birthday. 

February 2018 12 | design

All Things underfoot Ishrat Sahgal makes luxurious carpets out of sari scrap, giving upcycling a new meaning By Anupam Dabral ince childhood, Ishrat Sah- create something “cosy”. “I was gal was intrigued by small always looking for little nooks and details. “I used to walk into corners to curl up to spend my af- spaces, observe art and ar- ternoon reading.” Schitecture and wonder how I could It’s no wonder then that interior make a difference as a creative per- architecture ended up being a nat- son,” says the Chandigarh-born ural choice of career and Rhode designer. She also had a desire to Island School of Design was the

February 2018 design | 13 perfect place to nurture it. and boring to something that could Studying and working in New uplift a living space. York taught Ishrat to look at design Passionate about Indian handi- with a global perspective while crafts and sustainability, and pos- maintaining a strong Indian sen- sessing a keen eye for excellent sibility. She observed a gap in the workmanship and thoughtful de- Indian market and noticed how sign, Ishrat came across upcycled carpets were never considered to sari silk, a beautiful new material be a centerpiece while laying down that is culturally significant and a décor scheme for space. entrenched in Indian history. Inspired by the Conté drawings One thing led to another, and by Georges Seurat and the Lepan- her ‘floor art’ label Mishcat Co was to panels by Cy Twombly, besides born in 2013. Her idea was to cre- her all-time inspirations, Italian ar- ate carpets that were so luxurious chitect Carlo Scarpa and Japanese that one could build a narrative architect Tadao Ando, Ishrat set around them. out to explore carpets as a medium Today, the Delhi-based Ishrat of her creativity and also refurbish heads a design team full of pas- their image from something drab sionate craftsmen who are on a

Studying in New York exposed Ishrat to a variety of aesthetics and trained her to look at things differently

February 2018 14 | design

never-ending drive to experiment, skeins, and then weavers hand-knot leading to endless ideas. “Our de- them into carpets. Because of the sign team and weavers are encour- different yarns available each time aged to experiment with small and the colour blending, each car- swatches and samples of new things pet ends up being one-of-a-kind. and contribute equally to new ma- In a country where carpet-mak- terial mixes, patterns, and color- ing as an art form is passed on from ways. It is all super exciting and the men of one generation to the very inspiring,” says Ishrat, who next, Ishrat’s vision for the hum- works with sustainability in mind, ble carpet stands out. Her carpets using only leftover silk yarn from are more than just a piece of home independent weavers in south In- décor vocabulary; they are collect- dia, dyeing with natural colours ibles, the result of art, interiors, and and restricting washes to a mini- sustainable architecture coming to- mum during the finishing process. gether. With India growing up to The yarns they source come in the sensibilities of not just fine liv- a myriad of luminous colours. Ish- ing but responsible living too, Ish- rat’s team blends them together into rat is the one to watch out for. 

Ishrat Sahgal’s carpets are available on her website Mishcatco.com. Made of yarn leftover from silk saris, which is different each time, and the subsequent colour blending, each carpet ends up being one-of-a-kind.

February 2018 interiors | 15

home grown After 25 years of restoring heritage and designing the interiors for luxury properties, Ritu Khandelwal is more in love than ever with the idea of India t any given time, Ritu the Jaipur-based architect, whose Khandelwal is working on reputation for restoring heritage 60 to 70 large-scale interi- properties precedes her. ors projects around India, Born in Raniganj, West Bengal, Aranging from schools to hotels to which is famous for its coalfields, luxury residences, but that doesn’t Ritu’s family moved to Rajasthan stop her from setting up design when she was three years old, where festivals. “The best part about my her father took up stone mining. work is the constant change,” says While studying in a public girls’

February 2018 16 | interiors

school in Jaipur, and encouraged accompanied her friends to more by her talented singer-mother, Ritu prestigious colleges, and began do- enthusiastically took up a multi- ing projects for free for their stu- tude of activities – from dancing to dents as a method of learning from painting to drama and sports. But the best. “Being in a bad college ig- by class 10, she was sure she wanted nited the fighting spirit in me.” to be an architect. Her passion spurred her college She sat for the state pre-engi- friend Sandeep Khandelwal to take neering exam and, to her surprise, more interest in studies – and in was ranked among the top 100. her! Their relationship would cul- Contrary to her teachers’ advice, minate in not just a personal part- the 18-year-old insisted on signing nership – they married seven years

Rajshikhar villa, a private home in Jaipur, done up in a contemporary Indo-Asian style with vibrant colours

up for a five-year architecture de- later – but also a professional one, as gree instead of four years of engi- they set up their firm Sthapatya Ar- neering. “You’re mad,” her teachers chitectural Design Studio together and peers chided. a year after marriage. Due to her family’s modest With Sandeep’s love for nature means, she joined the then newly and travel, and Ritu’s affinity for opened Malaviya National Insti- art and culture, the couple chose tute of Technology in Jaipur and to highlight Indian crafts and de- was the first student to register for sign traditions in their work. Over its B.Arch course. “It was in a bad the next two decades, they restored shape; we had no facilities,” Ritu re- architectural marvels such as the calls. Spurred to educate herself, she 230-year old Alila Fort in Bishan-

February 2018 interiors | 17

garh and the Shahpura Haveli in that brings designers and craftsper- Jaipur, and worked with hospitality sons together. Given Ritu’s love for clients especially those who wanted music, it included a Sufi night as to convert ancient mansions or pal- well. “Poets are gods to me,” she says aces into modern-day hotels while passionately, explaining her choice keeping the region’s traditional ar- of entertainment over rock bands. chitecture intact. “When it begins, I just go sit in the They also made a name for them- crowd and forget myself.” selves doing up old havelis, besides Ritu’s love for work overshadows schools, colleges and institutions, her interest in fame. Always hesitant and for the innovative use of stone. to “show off” her work to people, “We tend to use a lot of Rajasthani the self-effacing perfectionist of-

L-R: Ritu did the interiors for renowned jewellery designer Sunita Shekhawat’s Jaipur store; with her family

fabric and craft,” says Ritu, who is ten feels, “This isn’t enough. What’s mother to a 21-year-old daughter there to show?” Despite all the ac- and an 11-year-old son. Even so, claim, she is rather detached on the despite the accolades, she felt there inside: “I run after my passion. If I wasn’t enough interaction between am not feted it wouldn’t bother me, the design and craft communities in but it does bother me if I am not India, at least at a commercial plat- able to do justice to my work.” form. So she set out to fix it. It’s a philosophy that the legend- Along with Shalini Agarwal, who ary Rancho from the blockbuster is a well-known name in Jaipur’s Bollywood film 3 Idiots would have exhibition circuit, she set up Nine- approved of: “Pursue excellence, DotSquares, a unique design festival and success will pursue you.” 

February 2018 18 | career

Smile expert In the process of perfecting people’s smiles, Dr Ekta Chadha has picked up quite a few lessons in ambition and self-love

ime management is the key to Gregarious, generous and highly success, believes Ekta Chadha. focused, Ekta constantly sets targets As a young student of dental for self-betterment. Born and raised science, she dreamt of achiev- in Allahabad, the bright student ingT three things before she turned graduated from Patna and went on 40: a state-of-the-art dental clinic; a to study at Maulana Azad Medical class-E Mercedes; and being a golf- College in Delhi, and at DY Patil er. “As long as you utilize your time University in Mumbai. While in well, especially the hours from 5 am college, she married an orthopaedic to 10 am, you can do anything,” says surgeon who was much older than Ekta, who put a check on all her her, but she “loved his sense of hu- goals six months before deadline. mour”. They stayed on the college

February 2018 career | 19

campus where her mother-in-law concept didn’t exist, Ekta was one was head of gynae-obstetrics. Soon, of the pioneers of ‘dental tourism’ Ekta had a daughter, and then a son. in India, and was sought after by Leaving the kids in Delhi, Ekta foreigners. She realized early on went to the US to pursue higher that simply fixing teeth would not education at University of Buffalo ensure a perfect smile – there were (SUNY). “My mother-in-law was other factors at play. So she invit- very encouraging and my husband ed specialists such as a nutritionist is my hukum ka ekka (ace of spades),” and a cosmetologist to join her in says the 45-year-old. “He is my mo- offering wholesome solutions. Her tivation. One cannot grow without Smile Studio, which uses the latest backend support.” technology and gizmos, is now a

L-R: Dr Ekta Chadha at her state-of-the-art Delhi clinic; with her family at an event hosted by her; at work

On her return, Ekta took a loan lifestyle makeover clinic, with a car- to buy space for a clinic, which diologist and her orthopaedic hus- took her 22 years to pay off. The band on board as well. going was tough, to say the least. Yet, Ekta also makes sure to in- She had to manage debt, two young vest on her mental health: golf three children, a budding clinic, Delhi’s times a week, bridge twice a week, sealing drive, and an incorrigible coffee with friends or anything else workaholic husband who had three that helps her unwind. “If you’re heart attacks along the way. unhappy in one area of your life, But there was also recognition you’ll be unhappy in others too,” and growth. Terming herself a den- she avers, adding, “Please yourself. tal aesthetician at a time when the You’ll enjoy work more.” 

February 2018 20 | cover story living by the

It isn’tw just the entertainingor plots and lighthearted optimismd of her books. What makes Anuja Chauhan an icon is her refusal to fit in Text by Aekta Kapoor. Photography by Rohit Chawla

er name means ‘young- and power. I have a problem with er sister’, and so Anuja that,” she says. Chauhan, the 48-year-old The Delhi-based writer would mother of three and author know a bit about social percep- Hof five bestsellers, has always been tions and power. Born in Meerut somewhat attracted to ‘seniority’ to an Army officer, she spent her in life. The youngest of four sis- childhood between Meerut and ters, she was blessed with eternally Delhi, finally graduating with an youthful looks, and till about a year economics degree from Miranda ago, was accustomed to being told House, Delhi University. She did she looked like a sister to her two her Master’s in mass communica- daughters (now 22 and 20) and son tion from the Royal Melbourne (17). “But I want to look like their Institute of Technology. mother,” she mock sulks. Her parents and two sisters mi- And so, in an act of personal de- grated to Australia after her father’s fiance, Anuja allowed her hair to retirement. “I had permanent cit- go grey in the past year. “Let me izenship too, but I much preferred look my age; I have earned my India so I gave it up and came back,” white hair,” she says, narrating says Anuja, who was still a college comical instances of Uber drivers student when she fell in love with and restaurant waiters calling her Niret Alva, the son of senior Con- ‘ma’am’ and being extra respectful. gress leader Margaret Alva. After a “I get so much more bhaav now.” four-year relationship, they tied the But underneath the humour lies knot in 1994 and settled in Delhi. a more serious motive. “We should The couple moved to Bengaluru stop equating youth with beauty three years ago.

February 2018 cover story | 21

Anuja has a quirky, colourful and youthful sense of style

February 2018 22 | cover story

L-R: With husband Niret who runs his own TV production company; Anuja’s home décor is warm and vibrant

With her natural wit and pro- Zoya Factor (2008) will start shoot- pensity for putting her finger on ing in April this year, Battle for Bit- the pulse of the people, Anuja tora (2010) has been bought by Anil came up with hugely popular ad Kapoor Film Company, and Baaz catchphrases such as ‘Yeh dil maange (2017) by Yash Raj Films. The TV more’ for Pepsi, ‘Darr ke aage jeet rights for Those Pricey Thakur Girls hai’, and ‘Tedha hai par mera hai’ for (2013) were purchased by Zee En- Kurkure, besides many others from tertainment Network, who con- the mid-90s onwards. In 2010, af- verted it into a daily soap. ter a 17-year creatively charged and And yet Anuja insists she would successful stint at J. Walter Thomp- never have written the way she has son, she quit her job and dedicated if she had a movie script in mind. herself to writing. Her first book, “After The Zoya Factor’s sale of about a young ad executive who movie rights, I was expected to proves to be a lucky mascot for the keep writing ‘young, bubby’ sto- arora Indian national cricket team, was a ries but I refused to pay attention to

runaway success, and set the tone what was trending in Bollywood. : punya for four more ‘rom-com’ novels On the contrary, I wrote Battle for over the next eight years. Bittora before Anna Hazare made Film rights for three of these politics ‘trendy’. I was told that a

have already been bought – The romance with a political storyline credit home P hoto

February 2018 cover story | 23

wouldn’t work – yet I wanted to es: “Everyone seems to have issues. write it,” she asserts. Marriages have become transac- There is a certain innocence in tional, but unless we spend time Anuja’s novels, even when there are and money on our relationship, it dark undertones of social injustices just becomes a wasteland.” such as in Those Pricey Thakur Girls. In mid-2016, Anuja’s 81-year- Anuja admits she believes in the old mother passed away. “She had inherent goodness of people, and prefers to give a message of hope rather than despair. Her readers are “I am an open parent obviously addicted – all her books and have been very are rated in Amazon’s top 100 transparent about my books in Indian fiction even years after publication – and Anuja has life with my kids” no intention of letting them down. A sixth book is in the fray. Her personal life is a rich source so much grace and strength. She of fodder for her writing. “I am an would say, hai hai, don’t let your open parent and have been very hair go grey – pehle mujhe marne toh transparent about my life with my de (let me die first),” recalls Anu- kids. I figured it would encourage ja, who was deeply affected by her them to share their lives with me mother’s loss. “So after she died I too – that was my mothering strat- was like, okay, I can do this now.” egy,” she explains. She also has her Lightly said, her words ring with own take on 21st century marriag- self-confidence. And peace. 

L-R: Anuja with Niret, and children Nayantara Violet, Niharika Margaret and Daivik John; her latest book

February 2018 24 | business of books and luxuries Running one of India’s oldest publishing houses with new verticals in luxury and real estate, Monica Malhotra Kandhari is on top of her game

Monica Malhotra

he always wanted twins, anced and sorted of the two! Both and so when her first son are very independent kids,” gushes was born 19 years ago, she the proud mum. quickly had another. Even It is interesting to note that no Stoday, Monica Malhotra Kandhari, matter how wealthy or success- managing director of the MBD ful women are in their professions, group, loves talking about her chil- family continues to be top priority. dren. “The elder one is doing his Today, Monica heads one of India’s degree in English literature; he’s a most reputed publishing houses ferocious reader. The younger one, with interests in educational tools who is in class 12, is the more bal- and technology, luxury retail, five-

February 2018 business | 25

star hotels and real estate, but her Today, MBD owns almost 10,000 corporate leadership has an empa- titles, some of which are the bibles thetic quality about it and her role in their domains. as head of her household is intact. Coming from a society where “Motherhood has made me super- women were not expected, or even woman,” she says. allowed, to work, Monica gives her With her roots in Punjab, Monica father Ashok Malhotra great credit studied in girls’ convents in Delhi for encouraging his two daughters and joined her father in his books to take on the mantle after him. “I business when she was 15. “I wasn’t had that fire to prove my mettle as an avid reader but I observed every- a girl,” she says. After joining her fa- thing – how my father handled his ther in his printing-press business, business, pre-press and post-press the father-daughter duo expanded functions, accounting, marketing… to hospitality (they own the Radis- I spent time in each department,” son Blu MBD hotels in Noida and recalls Monica, who commissioned Ludhiana), paper mills, manufactur- and published her first book – a ing, two luxury malls, and are now picture dictionary, which also won setting up fully serviced apartments. an award – when she was just 18. After her father’s death in Decem-

Clockwise from top left: MBD is a market leader in educational material; the lobby at Radisson Blu MBD Noida; Monica (left) with her younger sister and business partner Sonica; the patisserie in the Noida hotel

February 2018 26 | business

Radisson Blu MBD Ludhiana has won two awards for its design. Seen here (clockwise from top left): The spa, the oriental restaurant Red, and the Prive room. Bottom left: Monica with her sister Sonica and mother

ber 2009, Monica and her young- Indian government as the official er sister Sonica handle the entire printer in 15 states, and with a na- group with over 5,500 employees. tionwide presence in South Africa Interestingly, Monica has designed and Sri Lanka, Monica says MBD’s the hotels herself, and her interiors differentiator is that, with a huge have won two awards. investment in e-learning, they are a Both sisters are married to two step ahead of the curve. “I see what brothers – “Why look very far?” today’s kids are doing, and I think says Monica nonchalantly of their ahead. We have to move fast to keep arranged marriages – and have two up with them,” she explains. kids each. “We handle different Believing that women in conser- functions in the business,” explains vative societies need to ensure that Monica. She constantly pushes the their families don’t feel neglected company towards innovation in while they pursue their ambitions, education – whether it is the use the 45-year-old has reached a point of virtual reality in their educa- of self-assurance and confidence in tional apps, 3D printing, robotics, her personal and professional life: or assessment and teacher-training “I look eye-to-eye at myself in the portals. Having partnered with the mirror. I have earned my space.” 

February 2018 screenshot | 27 Grit and Glamour avantika sinha, 35, mumbai

rowing up in Darjeeling, my parents would take my broth- G er and me to new places every winter so that we could learn about new cultures, histories and people. The annual ritual immersed us in experiential knowledge. I wish my baby daughter Aadya can experience it too when she’s older. I did my schooling from Sherwood College, Nainital. While doing my graduation in Bengaluru, I applied to Cardiff University. To my surprise, I got an unconditional offer to join. My father was petrified about sending me so far away, but he soon realized he had a very stubborn daughter! So I went to London to do my Master’s. In 2004, I moved to Mumbai, and in 2009, set up my own celebrity PR firm, Soapbox. My two-year-old and I share a beautiful bond with my mom – for me, unwinding means going on a girlie trip with them! But my father inspires me most: he worked through law school, became an advocate and hotel owner, all because he fell in love with my mother – who was the first woman PhD from West Bengal – and wanted to give her a good life. My mother says, “Education and strength of character are the only things that will stay with you when all leave, so make sure they are strong.” I hope I’ve done her proud. 

February 2018 28 | author interview thought provoker Author, academic and artist Kota Neelima set out to express the woman’s voice in her books – from media and politics to farmer suicides – and found it to be near-impossible to tell the whole truth

February 2018 author interview | 29

here is the woman in whole story just can’t be put into the story? After nearly language. How can one not be an- two decades as a po- gry in these times?” she asks. litical journalist, a PhD A gripping page-turner about Wscholar with a thesis on democratic wheeler-dealers in the corridors of reforms, and an author of three crit- power, the book explores the grit ically acclaimed books on politics of urban life, political chicanery and farmer suicides, Kota Neelima and modern-day relationships. But came to the uncomfortable realiza- the reader cannot brush off an un- tion that she was eclipsing herself easy sense of uncertainty, fear and a from the narrative. chillingly silent fury beneath it all. And so, while her third book The female gaze is dark and deep.

L-R: Neelima paints trees of all hues, and holds exhibitions every now and then; with her easel and paints

Shoes of the Dead (Rupa Publica- woman of many talents, Neeli- tions, 2013) was being hailed as Ama did her Master’s in inter- one of the most successful books of national relations from Jawaharlal political fiction and is now being Nehru University in Delhi and was made into a film, Neelima decided senior research fellow at Johns Hop- to write her next one, The Honest kins University, Washington DC. Season (Penguin Random House, She also studied at Arpana Caur’s 2016), from the point of view of a Academy of Fine Arts and Litera- female journalist. And it was harder ture, and, besides her writing and than she expected. “It is traumatic academic work, paints trees – lots of to write from the perspective of trees – which for her is a process of a working woman in India – the sensory and spiritual discovery.

February 2018 30 | author interview

As former political editor for The Sunday Guardian newspaper and principal correspondent for The In- dian Express covering politics, she had been immersed in issues con- cerning democracy, farmer distress, and the rural poor in India for years. But it is only of late that her writing has taken a new direction. Releasing this month, Neelima’s latest work Widows of Vidarbha (Ox- “Women are invisible to the state, the community... this denies them their constitutional rights”

ford University Press, 2018) talks means these women are stepping about the widows left behind by out of home for the first time, fill- farmer suicides. “Women in rural ing up bank forms, making a living, areas do more than 50 per cent of developing a sense of self-respect. the farm labour, but they are nei- Their children are growing up with ther paid nor counted as cultivators. stronger female role models,” she They are invisible to the state, the reports with a sense of awe, seated community, and even to their fam- in the study of her Delhi home. ilies. This denies them their consti- The widows in Neelima’s book tutional rights. It’s only when the have learnt to protest in quiet ways, farmer dies does one realize the and avoid confrontation so as not sorry state of the wife in his shad- to disturb the patriarchy. Theirs is a ow,” says Neelima, who followed silent, subversive fight to get their several widows in two districts of due. “Their hope is not like ours. Vidarbha for three years. Theirs is life-giving; it’s a force. Yet, Neelima found reasons to They have no option but to survive hope despite their dismal circum- and succeed,” says Neelima. The stances. “Not having a man around story isn’t over yet. 

February 2018 overcoming obstacles | 31 Listening by Heart Her hearing impairment pretty much informed the narrative of Sonam Kejriwal’s life, until her mother was murdered, and she was given a new cross to bear

ix months ago, Sonam Ke- Still not satisfied that she was dead, jriwal’s mother Nisha was he took out a knife and slashed her murdered by their 20-year- face and body, and crushed her face old neighbour in Kanpur. with the hammer. Then he coolly SThe Kejriwals had known the fam- left the home with his stash. The ily for decades, and had watched next day he fled to Mumbai. the boy grow up. He had taken Sonam had last spoken to her advantage of Nisha being alone at home in the afternoon, and had entered the home with the pretext of working on their laptop. When Nisha went to the kitchen to get him something to drink, he broke open her cupboard and stole a large amount of cash and jewellery. On seeing what he was up to, the stunned middle-aged woman asked him, “Kya kar rahe ho beta (What are you doing, son)?” Those were the last words she ever spoke. Afraid that she would tell his parents, the boy Aditya ‘Raghav’ Narayan, the scion of a wealthy cin- ema-owner, battered Nisha with a hammer he had concealed under his clothes. As she fell on the floor, Ra- ghav smothered her with a pillow. Sonam Kejriwal

February 2018 32 | overcoming obstacles

mother at 2 pm – “Mummy always of her parents and two siblings, be- made it a point to call me post lunch sides her exceptional intelligence to check if I’d eaten.” In the eve- and photographic memory, she ning, her father called her, “Come managed to complete her school- home immediately.” ing with top marks, and made it to Rushing from Lucknow – where engineering college in Pune. she works with Indian Oil – to Sonam’s younger sister Sonali had Kanpur, Sonam was struck with an a major role to play in helping her ominous feeling. Nothing would cope: speaking out movie dialogues ever be the same again. Until July 2017, the biggest chal- lenge in Sonam’s life had been her hearing impairment. She was fitted with hearing aids at a very young age, something that made her moth- er uncomfortable. “People can see my baby has a problem,” the gentle, old-fashioned homemaker mourn- ed. But Sonam’s father, a business- man who had been through much struggle and the loss of his own loved ones early in life, was unfazed. His daughter’s hearing impairment was a minor issue for him, and he always made sure to get her the best hearing aids money could buy. The technology got better as she grew older, and she can now wear aids that are customized to her needs. From top: At an event for Indian Oil; with her family Even so, Sonam struggled through childhood not just due the physical to her, re-playing hit songs to help hindrance but also social ostracism Sonam understand the lyrics, being in small-town Kanpur. Trained to her personal jukebox and partner. read lips and correlate it with the “My family was always focused on sounds in her ears, she could not me, and Sonali got very less atten- pick up loudspeaker announce- tion all through childhood,” recalls ments, or what her teachers said Sonam. “When I went to college, I with their backs turned, or movies told her, now go live your own life.” without subtitles. With the support Working twice as hard as her

February 2018 overcoming obstacles | 33 peers, Sonam graduated as a chemi- cal engineer, and then did her MBA. This is how you can tell if a child or She joined Indian Oil in 2012, and adult has a hearing impairment: is now part of the team implement- ing the government’s acclaimed • They tend to look at your eyes Ujjwala Yojana. Workplace chal- and lips when you speak lenges – such as needing to look at • They frequently ask you to colleagues face-to-face, and intoler- repeat what you said ance for noisy environments (which • They have difficulty talking on jumble up the sounds in her ears) – the phone (since they cannot have been smoothened out over the read your lips) years, for which Sonam credits her • Their speech is not clear colleagues and India’s public-sector HR policies that mainstream the Sonam suggests these ways to disabled in many ways. deal with someone with hearing impairment: sonam is part of the Speak slowly: Just slowing down your pace can help them team at indian oil comprehend your words better. implementing the Minimize background noise: government’s acclaimed Hearing aids often jumble up ambient sounds so the noisier it ‘ujjwala yojana’ is, the more headache-inducing for the hearing-impaired. But, at 32, the struggle to find a Speak a bit louder, but don’t life partner continues with matri- shout: It is amplified in their ears monial ads yielding only humiliat- and is somewhat demeaning. ing results. “My mother constantly Don’t cover your mouth when you worried about getting me mar- speak: Lips don’t lie! For the same ried,” says Sonam, sadly. After her reason, don’t speak while looking mother’s death, Sonam is no longer away from the person. Wait until bothered about her relationship sta- they are positioned face-to-face. tus: “Whoever I marry will be the Don’t talk with your mouth full: luckiest guy in the world.” There’s a reason the hearing- Talkative and confident, Sonam impaired can’t stand those who has made disability and loss “a fuel chew paan masala! to her fire”: “I got acclimatized to Communicate through writing: overcoming obstacles early on in That’s what WhatsApp is for. life. I can now handle anything.” 

February 2018 34 | MEDIA

news maker TV anchor Sahar Zaman has a surprising creative side to her personality – as a product designer

he Kuwait War turned Sa- was, serendipitously, beamed in Ku- har Zaman’s life upside down. wait where her dad could hear her T Born and brought up in the shows. Over the next decade, she small Arab nation, Saddam Hussein’s worked at news agencies and TV invasion in 1991 forced the family channels, taking a break to marry a to move to India. Their home was former colleague – media personal- looted in Kuwait, and the family ity Dhiraj Singh – and raise a baby struggled to adjust in Delhi. The with him. They named their son momentous event sparked off an Kazuo after the Nobel Prize-win- interest in current affairs and world ning novelist Kazuo Ishiguro. politics, and led Sahar to pursue the Today, Sahar is a well-recognised path of journalism as a career later. personality on Mirror Now, a new After completing her Master’s in channel launched by the Times mass communication from Jamia Group last year that looks at civic Millia Islamia University in Del- issues and has grown hugely popu- hi, she worked at the overseas di- lar in a very short span of time. Sa- vision of All India Radio, which har also runs an art-themed online

February 2018 MEDIA | 35 channel called Hunar TV, where she first-of-its-kind campaign, she or- profiles people from creative fields ganized a series of flash mobs across and demystifies art for the layman. malls in Delhi-NCR with dancers Sahar has a creative side herself. swaying to old songs by the Bolly- In her early years after marriage, wood playback legend. “This flash she took to creating home decora- mob is historic! Where else have tive items and jewellery using cut- you heard of a flash mob on vintage outs of reflective sheets on metal. music happening anywhere?” she In 2011, after encouragement from asks. The series of flash mobs are family and friends, she launched her building up to a grand finale this own label, Chamak Patti, working month, his birth anniversary, in an from home and collaborating with undisclosed location. artisans to make limited-edition Intelligent and collected, Sahar products priced `1500 onwards. has balanced out the various facets If a full-time media job, a to her personality – the journal- web-channel, an accessories brand ist and the artist. “Both are inher- and a six-year-old son weren’t ent sides of me. I wouldn’t survive enough to handle, Sahar is also without either,” she says, before get- out to reignite interest in her late ting back to work. There’s so much grand-uncle Talat Mahmood. In a to do, create and talk about. 

Sahar designs a variety of lifestyle and fashion accessories. Bottom left: At the launch of the Talat Mahmood Festival in Delhi. Bottom right: With her husband Dhiraj and son Kazuo at home

February 2018 36 | marriage

how to be a fair bride That’s what most Indian grooms want, isn’t it? A fair bride! So do your bit, and make sure you’re fair – to yourself, above all. By Sana Hoda-Sood ou’ve seen the hoardings Thanksgiving turkey, marinate your looming large, those com- face with exotic wares from the on U nsplash mercials at frequent inter- Spice Route, or better yet, slather all vals. From Bollywood stars manner of carcinogenic evils wher- toY sports sensations, you’ve got to ever the sun does shine. And when is know – to succeed in life, to be fairness more important than when M ahmudov A lvin : confident, to attract whom you’re you’re stepping into Mrs’hood? So out to attract, you must be fair. here we are with a handy guide on

Perhaps baste yourself like a how to be a fair bride! credit P hoto

February 2018 marriage | 37

Cue society’s applause, because love, to live. Wives are often peddled you’re finally going to matter. the trope of sacrificing their peace for the sake of husbands and prog- Be Fair To Your Goals eny. Please remember you cannot If you’ve always dreamt of travelling pour from an empty vessel – nor through Europe, of making partner are empty vessels much more than at the firm, of learning the fine art shapely, baked clay. Be fair to your of sushi making – don’t stop work- heart and fill yourself to the brim. ing towards it. Marriage shouldn’t put an end to your goals, and replace Be Fair To Your free spirit them with producing sons and roll- Marriage isn’t the kiss of death. And ing round chappatis. Sure, priorities if it feels like it, either your partner may change here and there – but isn’t right, or marriage isn’t right for those things you’ve always wanted you. A wedding ceremony should to achieve in this life will haunt you not be an expensive passage into the if you let them fall by the wayside. Devil’s bowels (unless that’s your So be fair to them. thing). Whether your adventure is road-tripping off the beaten path, Be Fair To Your Family or the unwritten novel living in Your parents have raised you, your your blood – embark on the jour- friends have sustained you. They’ve ney. And take your spouse along for loved you, protected you, laughed the thrilling ride. with you, and propped you up in the face of failure. So when cross- Be Fair To Your Happy Place ing the stoop of your new home, The simple pleasures are usually keep your old village firmly planted the most precious. The quiet cup of where you wish. Through you hus- coffee in the morning. That book band, you may acquire an entirely you love to read and re-read. Bury- new family – but there’s plenty of ing your face in freshly laundered room in life for all of them. towels and drawing a deep breath (or is that just me?). When all else Be Fair To Your Health fails, you need your Happy Place. It’s Yes, get your annual checkups and where you keep your sanity tucked floss regularly. But also, be fair to away, it’s where your comfort crawls your mental and emotional health. out to bear-hug you. So be fair to Your wellbeing is ultimately all you this space, to this feeling – you need have in life, and it will affect your it to keep feeling like you.  ability to be happy, to raise a family, Sana Hoda-Sood is the founder of Hap- to excel in your career, to travel, to pyShappy.com and mother of two boys

February 2018 38 | humour

What If We Had a Sanskari Ministry of sex? By Unsanskari Stree t’s Valentine’s month, and be- for Environment despite the Delhi fore you get any cheeky ideas, smog, poisoned rivers and sobbing please be informed that a Min- farmlands), and therefore needs to

istry of Sex is underway. Why, be regulated. Thus, the Minister for on unsplash hamilton Iyou ask? Well, sex is an extremely Sex would have a full-on portfolio,

powerful and primordial activity, especially given our population of : matthew much like our environment, which 1.3 billion people, who all have du- also has a Ministry (I am assured bious antecedents – after all, their

by friends that there is a Minister very own parents had sex. credit P hoto

February 2018 humour | 39

What will this Ministry do, you learnt in other countries, or with ask? Here are some rules we foresee people of other countries, especial- being laid down (no pun intended). ly Pakistanis, are herewith banned. Rule No. 1: You can have sex only Rule No. 6: Sex will take place after showing Aadhaar card. There only on Holy Days, but it will be will be a March 31 deadline for banned on Very Holy Days. Also, to all consenting adults, of legal, sex- ensure that no one’s sensibilities are ual age to submit Aadhaar cards if offended, sex will only take place they intend to remain sexually ac- in bedrooms between 10 pm and 6 tive; else they will be rendered with am, at the same time that condom chastity belts, the budget for which ads are allowed on television. will come from Rule No. 2. Rule No. 7: Inter-community sex Rule No. 2: GST will be levied on is not illegal, but will be under scru- the sexual act. As we are a country tiny in case it promotes anti-na- that values marriage very highly, there will be GST of 18% levied on married couples every time they There will be a March have sex, and 28% on unmarried 31 deadline for all couples. In the case of homosexu- als and pansexuals, apart from GST, consenting adults there will also be VAT levied. to submit Aadhaar Rule No. 3: You can only use pro- cards if they intend to phylactics of ‘Made in India’ origin. Never mind that they come with remain sexually active the most asinine names, they are Made in India and patriotism needs us to push our economy further. tional tendencies. It is recommend- Bye-bye, Durex, we will miss you! ed that you follow the fine Indian Rule No. 4: Better still, using nat- caste laws and find a partner within ural methods of contraception are your own community for any kind to be encouraged, for instance, ty- of nefarious desires you may have. ing a lemon and some green chil- Rule No. 8: In case of a data leak, lies around the ankle or waist of the where your entire sexual history person you sleep with, red tilaks on can be obtained for the measly sum their forehead, and so on. of `500, you will not have any right Rule No. 5: Thou shalt have sex to sue anyone. Bear it with the for- only in positions advocated by an- bearance of your ancestors, as they cient Indian sages. Any internation- bore the Mongol raids, the Mughal al positions, which you may have invasion and the British Raj! 

February 2018 40 | body I Killed Someone Seeking stories of survival for a writing project, one student uncovered the sorrowful secret his friend has been holding on to for years By Ranak Mann

bout three years ago, I I saw you at a psychiatrist’s cabin encountered a long lost in the hospital three years ago. Have friend at a hospital. She things become better? A looked tired and a bit They have. I give myself a lot flustered. I enquired about her of the credit for it. Depression studies in the UK and she said can be crippling but the support she had returned to Delhi for system matters. How about I tell good. We spoke a little and then you why I landed into a clinically fell out of touch again, until now. depressed state of mind? My writing project ‘Colour Sure. Talks’ was in its initial stages of I had an abortion. I was young, uncovering stories with emo- I was stupid, but yes, I landed tional complexities. I was look- myself in an unhealthy situation. ing at the psychology of what a How did it all start? colour could mean to a person. I After school, I wanted to go decided to contact her. abroad to study. My parents were She was apprehensive when I not in favour of it, but I was head- told her the purpose of my call. strong. I managed to convince Anyone would be, if someone them and went to London. It came knocking on their door to was lonely for a while but I fit in talk about something that had eventually, though not with the

happened years ago. She refused right crowd. Everything was in on unsplash initially but, a week later, she my reach, freedom, alcohol, par- called. Here’s our conversation: ties and of course no supervision. velizar ivanov

Me: Long hair suits you. I got introduced to a handsome : Her: I like it too. I wanted guy. Things headed towards a re- to wear mogra flowers like my lationship. A very toxic relation-

mother, so I grew my hair long. ship. There’s no need to go into credit P hoto

February 2018 body | 41

“I was young, I was stupid, But Yes, I landed myself in an unhealthy situation” 42 | Body

the details but we conceived due march forward. to our stupidity. Just for record, You continued staying in London? we used protection but some- I returned home with my fam- how it did not work. I was 19. ily. We collectively worked on The abortion led to depression? my healing. The psychiatrist was Not only the abortion but also helpful but it was the efforts of the fact that I lost control over my my family that made it a smooth life. Studying and living abroad journey. I resumed my studies af- when you’re young requires ter a gap year. self-discipline. You are your own How did it feel to return to UK? protector and I felt I let myself It felt bittersweet, I had come down. It was an early pregnancy back a changed person. It ma- and two pills took tured me. At times care of it but it was I think of what life a messy aftermath. “We tried to would have been He went his way cheer ourselves like if I was not as after the abortion. privileged as I am. But the experience up rather than One may think changed me. It was get sucked into it’s absurd to com- not a full formed morbidity” memorate an abor- embryo but the tion every year. thought of what it As in? could have become saddens me. I have grown a mogra plant in I do not expect everyone to under- our backyard. My mother pro- stand how it hit your mental health. posed the idea. I think an early True, but my mother did. She pregnancy abortion is better than had an abortion too after con- bringing a child into a world ceiving for the fourth time. She of uncertainties. But everyone was with me when I was heavily grieves in his or her own way. My bleeding and puking. We tried to mother and I thought we’d give cheer ourselves up rather than get it a chance to survive symboli- sucked into the morbidity of the cally and that is what the mogra situation. My father was anoth- plant means to us. It’s cathartic. er pillar of strength and so were What colour would you like to my two siblings. They all landed choose for your story? in London when I told them the Grey. Life is coloured in shades truth. Sometimes life hits you in of it.  the face and you either choose to Ranak Mann studies creative writ- cry about it or learn a lesson and ing at Srishti Institute, Bengaluru

February 2018 screenshot | 43 Girl on the Go andi yuridna yudha, 20, hunan

y mother was very keen that I study medicine. She was M brought up in a village in central Indonesia, and girls there weren’t encouraged to study. Even so, her parents ed- ucated her well, and she became a journalist, and now works in the government’s child and women’s welfare department. I was born in Makassar, Indonesia’s fifth largest city with a population of about 2 million. My father consults with NGOs there. I always wanted to study abroad, so after school, with my mother’s initiative, I travelled to Hunan province in China to do my MBBS from Changsha Medical University. The ed- ucation is very good here. I have been here three years now and have picked up English and Mandarin. People stare at me a lot in China because of my hijab. But it’s how I represent myself, not so much a sign of my religion. I see it as my identity, a part of me. I feel that my two younger sisters have it easy in Makassar because they have all the facilities and the privilege of my parents’ support. I’ve had it hard the past few years. I was forced to be independent and take care of myself in a place far away from home. But I am pretty sure something good will come out of it. I haven’t arrived yet. I am still trying to enjoy the process. 

February 2018 44 | PERSONAL GROWTH

Talking to My Best Friend Time slips by and conversation flows when you’re with your bestie, doesn’t it? But in reality, only you can be your own best friend. By Kay Newton n the past, I often treated myself It took me many years to realize in a negative way. I was bullied that nothing they said about me was at school and in my first job, and true unless I wanted to believe them. I began to believe the things My thoughts create my reality and

Ithese people told me. “You’re not I have control over my thoughts. If : pi x abay very bright, you are ugly.” “You’re I didn’t like my thoughts or my re- fat, you’ll never amount to much.” ality, all I had to do was change the

And so it went on. way I perceived them. credit P hoto PERSONAL GROWTH | 45 At the same time, I also became and continue criticizing or wander aware of the little voice inside my off to do other things. head. This voice was one that agreed The more I wrap myself and my with my bullies. On and on it goes, inner voice in love, the fewer dis- full of criticism. It never seems to agreements we have and the more want to stop, even popping up in we seem to be in alignment, allow- the middle of a meditation session! ing me to go on and achieve my In the past I would have been goals without stress. abusive towards this inner voice, For example, I have always been laughing at it, shouting, getting an- overweight, some years more than gry, calling it names. Then I had an- others. Since menopause, I have other realization. found it hard to lose weight until I This inner voice is still part of found The Wild Fit program. Now me, in fact, it is my best friend. It I know that reducing carbohydrates is there to keep me and walking every safe from harm and day is the key to will do anything in “The more I wrap my healthy lifestyle. its power to stop myself and my inner This is the big pic- me pursuing any- ture, to stay healthy thing that could voice in love, the in 2018, yet my in- hurt me. My inner fewer disagreements ner voice still likes voice bases its con- we have” to tell me, it is al- cerns upon our past right to give in and history, its recollec- go back to old ways, tion of events. Yet because my inner to have a drink, eat a plate of chips, voice is part of me, by behaving like and so on. Now we can laugh about a bully, just as I was bullied in the it together. Sometimes I let my in- external world, I was actually doing ner voice win and indulge, just not myself more damage than good. all of the time. In fact, the more I Now, I sit and observe my in- take control, the less my inner voice ner voice, paying close attention bothers to react. It’s win-win. to what it has to say. I listen deep- I am the only person I am ever ly with love and then I calmly tell going to spend the whole of my it my point of view. We have real life with here on this planet. I came and great conversations, both air- into the world alone and will leave ing our thoughts, just as I would do it alone and that is a fact. Yet my in- with my best friend. We often agree ner voice will be with me for the to disagree and I go on to do my whole of this journey too. work, whilst my inner voice may Together, we are going to make it agree to watch over my shoulder one hell of a ride. 

February 2018 46 | revivalists Silk Route Sisters Aanchal and Akshita Sagar returned to India from Europe on a quest to revive the heritage Banarasi sari and make it relevant again

he last thing the Sagar sisters itage craft. And they can’t imagine had imagined for their ca- doing anything else. reers was reviving an ancient Born and brought up in Amba- weave. The management la, Haryana, Aanchal, the older of post-graduatesT found their way the duo, studied economics at Lady from Europe to the bylanes of Va- Shri Ram College in Delhi before ranasi, where they now work with heading to France to do her MSc in weavers to help revitalize the her- management. She then joined glob-

February 2018 revivalists | 47 al luxury giant Louis Vuitton. Her about 150 saris in silk and tissue, younger sister Akshita completed with a few dozen dupattas and her engineering and then her Mas- stoles each time. They also under- ter’s in business management from take customized orders, which take London. While Aanchal moved to about two to four months, and can San Francisco to study art and styl- re-create even hundred-year-old ing, Akshita returned to India and designs if you give them six months. joined Osawagro Industries, their “These are heirloom pieces; it will father’s scientific apparatus business. be hard to find these 20 years down Travelling across India and ex- ploring older cultures exposed the sisters to the rich – but increasing- ly rare – weaves of yore, especially Banarasi. “Those saris just don’t ex- ist anymore,” says 32-year-old Aan- chal, who moved to Bengaluru after her wedding, and is a trained Kath- ak dancer like her sister Akshita. On a trip to Varanasi, the duo came across an old weaver working as a manual labourer. “The weaver community has long been neglect- ed and weavers haven’t been given their due. So they are now mov- ing to other professions,” regrets Aanchal. Aggrieved to see the old man’s plight, the sisters talked to him about his background and his grandfather’s sari factory. Taking it as a challenge, the sisters decided to L-R: Aanchal Sagar and Akshita Sagar fund the weaver’s looms. After intense study of weave the line,” admits Aanchal, given the structure, yarn and the mechanics of migration of traditional weavers to looms, the sisters set out to re-create other professions. old Banarasi weaves. They worked Their buyers are mostly wom- with about 100 weavers, and finally en who have an eye for finesse launched their label Ohfab in 2016. and have been wearing or seeking They retail through private trunk classical weaves. After all, owning a shows around India, showcasing piece of history is priceless. 

February 2018 48 | accessories harnessing attitude Anam Patel’s pioneering concept of designer body harnesses aims to instill confidence in Indian women

aised between Mumbai and side of her personality. London, Anam Patel was Fascinated by the way jewellery deeply influenced by street could not only enhance one’s at- fashion and trends in the tractiveness but also be a personal RUK capital while she was a teenag- statement and an assertion of one’s er. After completing her graduation attitude, she enrolled for a design in marketing management from course to study the basics of jew- Kingston University, she dabbled in ellery design and, last year, returned various professions – from sales and to India to launch her label of body advertising to hospitality and HR harnesses, Anomaly by Anam. – before waking up to the creative Developed over months of re- search to test their technical fea- sibility, Anam’s harnesses are made of alloys of silver and brass, with some pieces plated with 22-karat gold and others silver. “The USP is the flexibility,” says the 28-year-old. “These harnesses fit any size and are very durable.” With two collections behind her and products priced in the range of `2500 – 20000, Anam calls her work statement jewellery for the body. “It’s something I always want- ed to wear as a teenager in London but wasn’t able to find something aligned with Indian aesthetics and culture,” she says, adding that her Anam Patel designs are inspired by historical

February 2018 accessories | 49

references such as body armour. ing or watching football, or reading Interestingly, her jewellery ap- novels. “Life isn’t only about mate- peals to women of all ages, women rial pursuits! I work hard and at the who have a bold sense of style and same time I also want to experience are intrigued by what Anomaly has everything life has to offer. We need to offer. “I have 15-year-old girls to balance it out,” she philosophizes. and 60-year-old women buying She admits that, as a quintessential my pieces – they appeal to a certain perfectionist, she struggled initially personality and have nothing to do while setting up the business, as her with age,” she says. karigars (artisans) were not used to Anam – whose father is a busi- taking orders from young women. nessman and whose two siblings also “But things are so much better now spend time between UK and India for women professionals than they – has a certain wild side to her, she used to be earlier, and as long as we admits. When she’s not doodling, keep on track, things will only get she’s riding horses, dancing, play- better,” she signs off.

February 2018 50 | accessories

Anomaly is only brand in the country to create a new type of body jewellery, the never- before-seen ‘shin harnesses’.

February 2018 accessories | 51

Anam Patel takes inspiration from history, world culture and music and considers late British designer Alexander McQueen as her idol.

February 2018 52 | accessories

Anomaly is designed to “make the wearer feel powerful” and instill confidence. The pieces are experimental, bold and expressive.

February 2018 accessories | 53

Two collections of Anomaly have been launched so far: Bellum, which means ‘war cry’, and Mandala, which is inspired from Buddhist symbols.

February 2018 54 | Food

Show your love for your on unsplash first Valentine by feeding

FOOD yourself the right foods : brooke lark for love By Kaveri Jain credit photo

February 2018 Food | 55

s a doting mother to two cessed and packaged food. I traded teenagers, taking time out preservatives for beautiful colourful for myself has always been berries, nuts, seeds, olive oil, ghee, a daunting task. The family coconut oil, whole grains, cheese, figs, fruits, yogurt, fresh leaves and andA their needs quickly fill up the front seat and, unknowingly, self- vegetables. love slides way back.  I dabbled between yoga, Pilates Though I do love the attention and weight/strength training five my spouse bestows on me on the times a week. Exercise is important; occasion of Valentine’s Day, last year it not only tones the body but is es- I decided to be my own Valentine sential for a healthier mind. and mark the day as the beginning  I made sure to treat myself with of my journey to self-love. a glass of red wine, some dark choc- This meant keeping my body and olate or a cool lemon sorbet every mind healthy. Today, after a year, I once in a while. Taking a day off am a transformed person; my jour- once a month and indulging in a ney of self-love through food has pizza or a brownie or whatever my put me right back in the driver’s body was asking for was part of eat- seat and I couldn’t be happier. ing my way to good health. This is how I did it:  I learnt to listen to my body. I  I decided to ditch “The Diet” noted foods that uplifted my spirit and switch to healthy eating. This on that dull day, or how much pro- was a mental trick and it worked. tein I needed after a heavy workout, I am never on a diet now; I just eat or how to eat right on a holiday. what’s right for my body and mind. And soon enough I did see the  I stopped rushing through my results. My weight, my skin, my meals. I sat and ate slowly without mental health slowly seemed to be watching TV or glancing through doing a happy dance. my phone. Who said healthy eating is bor-  I kept a check on my daily needs ing? Fall in love with yourself this of carbs, protein and fats and al- Valentine’s Day.  ways pre-planned my meals. Also, I made sure that I made small beau- Kaveri Jain is a home tiful looking meals for myself, using cook, food blogger, vodka connoisseur, my precious china every day rather and mother of two than saving all of it for that “special whose kitchen is her occasion”. kingdom. Write to  I reorganised my kitchen and her at kaverijain24@ did away with most of the pro- gmail.com.

February 2018 56 | getaway

couple goals Modern-day marriages need a dash of old-fashioned romance now and then, and a staycation at Claridges Delhi fits the bill

hen my husband and We talked about paying bills and I had first met, he had whose turn it was to walk the dogs. asked me to read Ga- We battled about inflated credit briel Garcia Marquez’s card bills (his) and an inflated to- WLove in the Time of Cholera. Some- do list (mine). We sat side-by-side how, the classic became ‘our book’, in bed working on our computers and the romance, melancholy and with deadlines to keep, and across longing in its pages coloured the coffee tables in restaurants looking early years of our relationship. into our phones. Social media kept Then, of course, marriage entered us informed about the other’s men- our lives and tucked romance away tal preoccupations. behind laptops and laundry. Romance got a new avatar.

February 2018 getaway | 57

Thankfully, we both realised that Built in 1952, the Claridges has marriage is all-inclusive. It has space been witness to most of Delhi’s for both the highs and the lows, the post-Independence history and it memorable moments and the for- gave us a bit of a thrill to sit in its gettable ones. We also realised that if lawn and sip masala tea knowing this we wanted to keep the flame alive, was the very spot Jawaharlal Neh- we’d have to do it ourselves. ru had sat once. Our room was in And so, as a new investment in the newly renovated wing done up our relationship, we planned a stay- with modern facilities, and though cation. You know, when you have a the hotel appeared quite full, it was vacation while staying in town. With absolutely quiet on our side of the his habitual visits to Chanakyapuri building. Perfect for writing, the for work and my fondness for lux- husband said, and sat down with his ury, the Claridges in Lutyens’ Delhi laptop near the window. was a mutually acceptable choice to I decided to re-read Love in the spend a night. So off we went with Time of Cholera. one bag full of clothes and another But soon, the attractions of the full of notebooks (“This can also be 132-room hotel lured us. The hus- my writer’s retreat,” he figured). band headed to the spa. I mulled

February 2018 58 | getaway

Top (L-R): Chicken kathi rolls at Dhaba; breakfast buffet at Pickwicks. Bottom (L): The lawn at Claridges Delhi

over what to have for dinner – there neighbourhood’s WhatsApp group. was oriental food at Jade, Indian at Before we knew it, duty beckoned the famous Dhaba, and the land- – hubby had to rush for a meeting, mark coffee shop Pickwicks. Finally, he apologized. I made a sheepish we decided to head to Sevilla, one face, “I have a meeting too.” of Delhi’s most happening Mediter- He left right away while I still had ranean restaurants, and had a lovely an hour to get ready and check out candlelight dinner outdoors – the with our bags. Hardly any writing sangria and heaters kept the cold at got done, I smiled to myself as I bay and the food left us warmly sa- packed away his laptop and note- tiated as we Instagrammed photos books, nor did I get too far into and behaved like excited teenagers. Marquez’s masterpiece. And then, it It was a chilly night and the heated struck me: both marriage and ro- pool gave off steam as we walked mance are but parts of the grander back to our room. connection that keep two people The next morning, we had a together. “Think of love as a state of wholesome buffet breakfast – and grace not as a means to anything... several cups of excellent brewed but an end in itself,” the Nobel coffee – over a hearty conversa- Prize winner wrote in the book in tion about national politics and my my hands. We need nothing else. 

February 2018 books | 59 On the Bookshelf Three book recommendations for February

Home Fire Kamila Shamsie (Bloomsbury, Rs 599) What is the immigrant experience? Is it the uneasy sense of being an outsider, or the involuntary instinct to hold on to one’s cultural roots? Kamila Shamsie’s latest novel weaves a complex web of compulsions and choices that drive a British immigrant family in different directions. In its gripping way, the book lays bare the elephant in the room for the South Asian diaspora: Does migration mean an addition or a dele- tion of one’s identity? Tough questions in a fluid new world.

Peach Emma Glass (Bloomsbury, Rs 499) A teenager is raped but cannot share her secret with any- one. Emma Glass’s debut stuns with its graphic descriptions, and what is left unsaid is perhaps even more gruesome. This novel, or novella, has made waves for its style and subject. But somewhere, the abstractions leave you unfulfilled and the brutal details appear to cover up for a plot that doesn’t go too far. Even so, it’s engrossing and provocative – worth a read, if only to check what the fuss is all about.

Born to Run Christopher McDougall (Hachette India, Rs 399) If you are a runner, and even if you aren’t, you need to read this book right away. Written by a sports writer who chased the world’s greatest and most elusive runners, the Tarahumara tribe of Mexico, for several years to write this book, it leaves you spellbound from the word go. You’ll learn about 100-mile ultra-marathoners, barefoot running, the curse of the sports shoe, and a lowdown of the most legendary race the world has ever seen. Phenomenal.

February 2018 60 | beauty nature-based beauty treats We at eShe love natural skincare products and ancient Indian healing therapies. Here are our picks of the month

Neoveda Spa Sometimes you just need a good massage to make all your problems seem better. An Ayurvedic massage with Shirodhara (`8,347) at the Metropolitan Hotel’s spa, Ne- oVeda, is just what you need on a day you’re overworked, underslept and aching all over. The therapist first gives you an invigorating body massage using long strokes, known as the Abhyangam. She then proceeds to gen- tly pour herbal oils on the forehead while you drift into a deep, relaxing trance. Shirodhara is said to modulate the activity of the hypothalamus in the brain, and regulate sleep and emotions. Just what a busy woman needs.

Biotique Launched in 1992 by Vinita Jain, who was born on a tea plantation in the foothills of the Himalayas and studied biotechnology in Switzer- land, Biotique has no peer when it comes to quality skincare that is also safe, easy-to-use and reasonably priced. Try their relaunched Saffron Youth Dew (`270), which gives you nourishment without oiliness.

February 2018 Beauty | 61

andaz spa Your treatment at the An- daz Spa, Delhi Aerocity, starts with picking out suitable oils and a coloured stone that tells the therapist (who is fab- ulous, by the way) just where the problem areas in your body are. Quiet, soothing and luxurious, this easily rates as one of the best spas in Delhi.

Mom’s Therapy This brand’s specialty is its cold- pressed black sesame oil, grown on their own farms in Guja- rat. Headquartered in Mumbai, Mom’s Therapy makes body-care products with natural herbs, along with floral extracts and Ayurve- dic ingredients. The Herbal Hair Oil (`339) and Body Oil (`279) are non-sticky and light, yet po- tent, and the Coffee Body Scrub (`225) leaves the skin smooth and soft, without drying it out.

alanna Launched in 2015 as a 100% natural and vegan skincare brand, Alanna offers 28 products spread across eight categories. We recommend the Oatmeal and Honey Soap (`150) for a gentle, fragrant bath; the Rose and Grapeseed Face Mist (`250), which moisturizes while toning; and the Age No Bar Deep Oil Cleansing Scrub (`450).

February 2018 62 | beauty

10 beauty tricks for busy new moms Nothing de-glamorises you like #momlife. Here are some quick

and easy tips if you have a little one taking up most of your : pi x abay waking hours. Who said looking good takes a lot of time?

By Hansa Makhijani Jain credit photo

February 2018 beauty | 63

cannot remember the last time It is a pain to get I wore nail paint or mascara. lipstick stains off I Even getting a mani-pedi feels like you’re sitting on a ticking time baby clothes. And bomb (“What if the baby needs babies do collect lots me?”). Instead, these are a few beau- ty tricks I’ve learnt post-childbirth. of them. Try lip tints Invest in the best hand cream or 24-hour-stay-on you can afford: Treat your hard- working hands to some nourish- lipstick. ing hand cream after each wash. Or try an express manicure: wash when dry shampoos are a saviour! your hands, use a scrub to slough Stash a glam-up kit in the di- off dead cells, and slather on some aper bag: The diaper bag replac- warm oil (sesame, jojoba or olive). es the handbag once baby comes Go kiss-proof: It is a pain to get along. Apart from the essentials like lipstick stains off baby clothes. And keys and wallets, stash a small toi- babies do collect lots of them. Try letries pouch in your baby’s diaper lip tints or 24-hour-stay-on lipstick. bag: transfer-resist lipstick, kohl, Befriend the kohl pencil: It just blotting paper and a mini comb – makes you feel complete. It’s pret- whatever makes you feel gorgeous! ty darn easy, hides lack of sleep and Keep your hair off your face: makes you look groomed. Babies love grabbing your hair. And Do everything in one go: When with postpartum hair loss, you can’t baby is in the land of nod, do every- afford to lose any more precious thing you need to do in the bath- strands. So get your hair chopped or room all at once. From brushing roll them up into a top knot or bun. teeth to bathing and blow drying. And don’t worry, messy buns are in. Opt for multi-tasking products: No time for hair colour? Cover A tinted moisturiser with SPF, greys with mascara or eye shadow. an oil-based body scrub, lip-and- Works great for those tell-all roots. cheek stain, conditioning shampoo, Fake a good night’s sleep with all-purpose balms and salves... all a cold compress: When plagued save you a lot of time. with sleepless nights, try a cold Dry shampoos are a godsend! compress to stimulate your skin. It Newborns nap for long hours, but will give you a healthy glow and around six months, those naps get boost blood supply to your skin. shorter and shorter. Long hot show- Follow it up with serum and an il- ers will feel like a luxury, and that’s luminating or tinted moisturiser. 

February 2018 64 | PERSONALtarot GROWTH

Love on the CARDS Your relationships guide for February, by tarot reader Alka Mahajan ARIES GEMINI Do not settle for less than you de- Be direct. Express your understand- serve. Judge potential partners by ing of life. You may meet or already what you know about yourself and know someone who is precise and your needs, not by what you used picky, a great conversationalist and to want. If you are already in a rela- excellent listener. But this person is tionship, kindness and the desire to also shrewd and calculating when empower will prevail, leading to the it comes to relationships. In your resurrection of love and attraction. partner, you will find a good coun- Love charm: Beige hues and sandal- sellor and mentor. Love charm: Floral wood fragrances. hues and lilac fragrances. TAURUS CANCER You have succeeded in becoming Enjoying yourself is as import- who you need to be for true love ant as working hard. Opportuni- to enter your life. If you are in- ties abound for romantic days and volved with a new love, it is the real nights, so take advantage. If you’re

thing; the cards indicate a possibili- looking for love or are in a relation- H effner on U nsplash ship, go on a trip or attend a cele-

ty of marriage. There is a feeling of anja wholeness and stability. Love charm: bration. Be grateful for your gifts.

Soft peach hues and rose scents. Love charm: White and pink hues. T : P hoto

February 2018 tarot | 65

LEO tionship including breaking up or Communication problems may in- divorcing, your prayers are about to terfere with your love life. Your in- be answered. Looking for love could tentions might be misunderstood. steer you towards a long-forgotten Messages of love and appreciation passion. Love charm: Sea-green hues. will be blocked. Insecurity will raise CAPRICORN its ugly head. You must overcome it You have endured difficult times and develop self-worth. Love charm: but now need to change your be- Beige hues and musk fragrances. liefs about yourself and realise that VIRGO you are in a much better position. An excellent time to manifest your Things are looking up. Give your- love dreams! Share your feelings in self permission to have fun. Love a straightforward way, while being charm: Maroon and mauve hues. receptive to others’ needs. Patronize AQUARIUS the arts, go shopping or enjoy your You are about to meet a charismatic wealth but do save for a rainy day. partner who loves you just as you Love charm: Lavender scents. are. You and your partner will reach LIBRA a position of power and will be re- The power of love may not triumph spected by those you respect. Learn over force, coercion and extremism. to love yourself unabashedly. Love Faith may be challenged or weak- charm: Pink hues. ened and the desired outcome may PISCES not be obtained. Don’t let fear stop You may get what you want and you from doing what is right. Pro- find that, in the end, it goes against tect yourself and your interests. Love your best interests. Be careful of charm: Orange hues. thoughtlessness, harassment or gos- SCORPIO sip. Even though someone is being You want to feel the heady excite- selfish, avoid blame and revenge in ment and promise of new love, even love. Love charm: Lavender shades in an existing relationship, but fear and fragrances.  of commitment in you or the other may leave you unfulfilled. You might Alka Mahajan is not be able to open your heart to an educationist, love due to old wounds. Invest in professional tarot self-love. Love charm: Floral hues. card reader and a certified counsellor SAGITTARIUS and psychotherapist. If you have been praying for more Write to her at freedom or some kind of funda- alkamahajan1@ mental restructuring of your rela- gmail.com.

February 2018 66 | screenshot Yogini Journey aya anandamayi, 32, delhi

orn in Fukuoka, Japan, I got my LLB from Osaka Universi- B ty, and also studied at Texas as part an exchange program. While there, an Indian friend introduced me to the concept of ‘Om’ and the practice of yoga. After returning to Japan, I joined Sony Corporation in their marketing division. A very inspirational teacher of belly dance whom I en- countered in Tokyo then introduced me to the idea of ‘Shiva Shakti’. Seeking the path of spirituality, I travelled to California to study yoga at Sivananda Yoga Farm. For almost one year, I devoted myself to the serious, disciplined practice of yoga in the US and Vietnam, before finally moving to India. I worked for a Japanese firm in Gurugram while volun- teering to teach yoga classes. As destiny would have it, I met my future husband, founder of Namah Shivaya Yoga School. Everything matched – our interest and our aspirations. We set up Namah Shivaya centres in Delhi and Gurugram to add to the existing teacher training programs in US and Mexico. More than 950 students have graduated from our centres so far. We also run a foundation to educate underprivileged chil- dren in Delhi. The teacher training course changed my life, so I have made it my mission to spread the light of yoga to others. This is the ancient wisdom I sought, and finally found in India.

February 2018 Every woman has a story – what’s yours?

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