The independent newspaper of Washington University in St. Louis since 1878

VOLUME 139, NO. 38 MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2017 WWW.STUDLIFE.COM

MOVIE MISFIRE YOGA CLASSES “The Post” doesn’t A Scene writer tries earn its emotional out a grueling yoga moments, a class at the Sumer Cadenza writer says Rec Center (Cadenza, pg 5) (Scene, pg 3) MEN’S TRACK WINS 16TH UAA TITLE (Sports, pg 9) IFC SU PASSES 2018-2019 BUDGET condemns Student Union chops nearly $650,000 from general budget requests Phi Delta ELENA QUINONES NEWS EDITOR COLLEGE CAT II SOCIAL Theta,

Student Union cut READERSHIP STUDENT PROGRAMMING $644,353.67 from the general PROGRAM GROUPS BOARD works budget requests for student activity funding, slicing money requested amount requested amount requested amount toward from requests made by Student Union entities and campus part- ners, based on recommendations $49,000 $40,000 $748,788 positive from joint Senate and Treasury bodies yesterday. — $49,000 — $10,000 — $107,751 fraternity SU Vice President of Finance amount cut amount cut amount cut and senior Iliana Ragnone supplemented Senate and culture Treasury’s suggested cuts of around $436,000 with her own ELLA CHOCHREK cuts of about $208,000, balanc- $0 $30,000 $641,037 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF ing the budget at $3,328,918.20. Last year, the joint bodies SOPHOMORE TRENDING Following the permanent sus- addressed a $190,000 deficit— CUTTING CLASS COUNCIL TOPICS pension of Phi Delta Theta, a fraction of the approximately Washington University’s $650,000 cuts it made this year. COSTS requested amount requested amount Interfraternity Council released The unprecedentedly large a statement expressing its disap- need for budget cuts this fis- Student Union’s proval of the actions taken by Phi cal year came as a result $5,000 $250,000 Delt members and advocating for of miscalculating the num- proposed budget came further training for all fraternity ber of incoming students to in almost $650,000 in — — members. Washington University. The the red. Check out some $5,000 $25,000 In the statement, shared with general budget is funded using amount cut amount cut Student Life by IFC president student activities fees, which of this year’s and senior Peter Rakita Sunday, represent 1 percent of each biggest cuts: the Interfraternity Council (IFC) undergraduate students’ tuition objects to Phi Delt’s behavior, GRAPHIC BY NOA YADIDI payments—this year coming to $0 $225,000 from the fraternity’s initial tem- $524 per student. Fewer students With approximately $650,000 budget, allocating the following: programming initiatives early in porary suspension for hazing to enrolling means less money to cut from the general budget, the year. its violation of the suspension’s pooled by student activities fees. Senate and Treasury looked at “How they choose to pro- terms. “Last year, they overesti- each line item critically to pro- CLASS COUNCILS gram with that money is totally “By not respecting the terms mated the amount of students pose recommendations for the up to their discretion,” SU Vice of their suspension and violat- who would be here and paying final budget. Each class council, which President of Programming and ing those terms throughout the the student activities fee,” SU By the end of the night, the implements programming spe- junior Kyle Jeter said. “I think semester, [Phi Delt] showed a lack President and junior Sydney joint bodies were narrowly cific to its respective classes, met that was a good move because of respect for the school’s admin- Robinson said. “So, this year able to achieve quorum. After a different funding outcome. something we’ve noticed year istration, the Greek community we had to have a bit more of over 15 hours of discussion, The First Year Class Council after year is that class councils and the Wash. U. community as a a conservative number for the Senate and Treasury approved for the class of 2022 received budget.” Ragnone’s $3.3 million balanced $1,000 in funding to kick off SEE BUDGET, PAGE 2 SEE PHI DELT, PAGE 10

Sam Fox establishes East End construction remains on schedule, secondary majors for affects ThurtenE Carnival, commencement non-art school students

AIDEN BLINN tried to design it in such a way STAFF REPORTER that it’s doable for a student in another field,” Corcoran said. Washington University’s Sam Corcoran added that a second Fox School of Design & Visual major in Sam Fox could inter- Arts will now allow non-Sam sect with a student’s primary Fox undergraduate students to field of study, even if that field obtain secondary majors. of study is outside of the art Previously, non-art stu- school. dents could only minor in the “I could imagine students school. Now, all undergradu- in business—like marketing ates can major in either Art or majors—being really interested Design, the latter of which has in doing fashion or communica- concentrations in fashion and tion as concentrations within the communication. Design major. Art History stu- Director of the College and dents might find that a second Graduate School of Art Heather major in Studio Art would really Corcoran believes that these new benefit their understanding of JIYOON KANG | STUDENT LIFE majors will allow undergradu- Art History,” Corcoran said. The East End of campus is currently under construction, and the project remains on pace for completion. The ates greater flexibility within the Corcoran sees these new ThurtenE Carnival will be moved due to the construction, and off-campus parking will be added for Convocation. Sam Fox School. majors as part of an overall goal “For a long time, we’ve to open Sam Fox to the other KATHLEEN WHITE wanted to provide students an schools in the University. STAFF REPORTER will occur between 6:30 a.m. and 5 ThurtenE Honorary’s media relations opportunity to do something a “We’ve been working toward p.m. until March 18. representative, said. “The Carnival little bit deeper and to develop this goal as a faculty for a very While construction on the East “The current pedestrian detour at will continue to offer attendees the a portfolio maybe or just to have long time,” Corcoran said. “The End continues, this year’s ThurtenE the School of Engineering will remain rides, games and booths they have more of an integrated program,” [Sam] Fox School is working Carnival will take place near Francis the same. Soundproofing measures come to enjoy in years past. We’re Corcoran said. “This is the way really hard to be integrated, and Field and Washington University’s are in development to mitigate noise looking forward to all that this new that we thought would be great hopefully this is one more step May 2018 commencement will be in in spaces on the south and west sides location will bring.” to do it.” toward that end.” Brookings Quadrangle, with parking of Whitaker,” Kojima said. Rather than finding the move According to Corcoran, Sophomore and located off campus at The Muny. ThurtenE Carnival will move from upsetting or challenging, ThurtenE the majors were designed Communication Design major The East End construction remains its place in front of to Honorary looks forward to having the to be accessible to students Maddy Angstreich recognized on schedule. Over spring break, work its original home near Francis Field. carnival return to its original home. across campus without being the importance of offering more will begin on the third floor bridge “The Washington University “The construction has not pre- overwhelming. avenues of study for under- between Jubel Hall and Whitaker community will witness the carni- sented an issue, but rather an “The second major program graduates interested in art and Hall. val come to life while walking near opportunity for the carnival to move is roughly half the credits that a design. According to Jane Kojima, com- the [Danforth University Center], back to its original location. This [Bachelor of Fine Arts] student munications manager for the East [Athletic Complex], Simon Hall and takes in the Fox School. We’ve SEE SAM FOX, PAGE 2 End transformation, daily demolition Seigle Hall,” junior Mari Hattenbach, SEE EAST END, PAGE 10

CONTACT BY POST CONTACT BY EMAIL CONTACT BY PHONE ONE BROOKINGS DRIVE #1039 [email protected] NEWSROOM 314.935.5995 #330 DANFORTH UNIVERSITY CENTER [email protected] ADVERTISING 314.935.6713 ST. LOUIS, MO 63130-4899 [email protected] FAX 314.935.5938 2 STUDENT LIFE DANIELLE DRAKE-FLAM & OLIVIA SZYMANSKI | SENIOR NEWS EDITORS | [email protected] MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018

SAM FOX from page 1 “This is great for people , He plans to take advan- who still want to incor- believes that Sam Fox’s tage of these new majors theFLIPSIDE porate design into their new degree options are a and expects other students MON 26 TUES 27 WED 28 education in a way that’s step in the right direction. on campus to do the same. SUNNY CLOUDY CLOUDY 58/37 64/46 60/46 more than a minor but “I’m glad that Sam Fox “I’ve personally been not a primary major,” is opening up more to stu- considering a major in Angstreich said. “This is dents from other colleges Communication Design the perfect middle ground on campus. I think it’s since hearing about these EVENT CALENDAR that people have been important to let students new secondary majors,” looking for.” pursue their interests He said. “I’m sure that MONDAY 26 Sophomore Kevin He, regardless of what their Sam Fox will attract a lot a marketing major in the primary focus is,” He said. of students like me.” Global Health Week 2018 – “The First 1,000 Days and Beyond: Women’s Role in Global Nutrition & Food Security” Seigle Hall, Room L006, 3 p.m. from page 1 Lora Iannotti from the Brown School. This is a Global Health Student Advisory Commit- BUDGET tee Initiative. Sponsors and Registration online. Walk-ins are welcome. take a while to transition while keeping the other Category II student into programming.” at $100,000, as a trial to groups received 75 percent Lecture: “Kafka from Puszta to Pampa” The class council for the see how SPB would use of their requested budget, Danforth University Center, Room 276, 5:30 p.m. class of 2021 received no the increased funding to with an allocated $30,000. Daniel Medin (Ph.D. 2005) presents The Annual William H. Matheson Lecture. Spon- funding from the general improve WILD. Another cut that sparked sored by Comparative Literature. (Note: Faculty panel discussion on Feb. 27 at 3 p.m. See budget due to a budget Ragnone altered the debate was a $25,000 Listing.) request that, according joint bodies’ recommen- reduction in the Trending to Senate and Treasury dation by funding each Topics budget, which is representatives, lacked WILD talent line-item at now allocated at $225,000. Lecture: “The (In)Flexibility of Racial Policies: Chinese Americans in the Jim Crow specificity and organi- $116,598.95 to achieve an Despite the slash, Ragnone South” zation. The incoming overall increased budget, does not expect an impact Women’s Building, Formal Lounge, 4:30 p.m. sophomore class council while maintaining balance on Trending Topics Stacey Lee of University of Wisconsin, Madison. Sponsored by the IAS Asian American will have the opportunity for the year across SPB programming. Speaker Series. to secure funding through programming. SU exec appeals. “I think [Senate and TUESDAY 27 Class council for the Treasury] came to a con- WHAT class of 2020 was nearly clusion that allowed SPB ENTITIES GOT Lecture: “Reframing Accountability: Leadership Enterprise for African Develop- fully funded at $2,522.19 to take some more initia- ment” for specific programming, tive and to grow as a body THE MOST Anheuser-Busch Hall, Room 306, 10:30 a.m. including a trip to Eckert’s in terms of their allocating FUNDING? Leslye Obiora from the University of Arizona, Rogers College of Law. Sponsored by Farm and a beginning of potential,” Ragnone said. School of Law Public Interest Law & Policy Speakers Series and the Harris Law Inst. the semester “kickoff.” Jeter expects to see next SU’s Allocation Boards Speaker Series. The requested budget year’s WILD artists reflect claimed $1.5 million for the class of 2019’s the increased budget. (available for student class council stirred up “That’s definitely going group appeals) in the fund- WEDNESDAY 28 discussion surrounding to show us if that extra ing process. socioeconomic diversity money really does make Diversity Affairs Global Health Week 2018 – “Gender & HIV Transmission & Treatment Disparities” of the student body and a difference,” Jeter said. Council was funded at Seigle Hall, Room L006, 3 p.m. accessibility to different “The inflation rate is real over $4,000, alongside (Runs from Feb 26 through March 1) Jon Cohen from Science magazine. This is a opportunities. The class and the talent we’re going other student groups Global Health Student Advisory Committee Initiative. Sponsors and Registration online. council requested fund- to be able to get with a and events rooted in cel- ing for Senior Week and bigger budget, knowing ebrating diversity and Walk-ins are welcome. a senior trip to Chicago. some of the people we got inclusion, like Destination Members of Senate and quotes on, is going to be a Q, Affinity Group and Treasury discussed, then lot better.” Identity Based Event POLICE BEAT recommended subsidiz- Most of the cuts to Fund, LGBTQIA Student ing these events to make SPB’s proposed budget Leader Conference and FEB. 21 Larceny—Umrath House them more accessible for came from a series of spe- Multicultural Conference a wider range of students. cific line-items. Senate and Fund. Complainant reports the theft of his bicycle. Loss $420 The joint bodies decided Treasury recommended “I was really happy to Dsposition: Pending on an $8 subsidy for each to cut SPB’s Labor Day see some of the confer- ticket and full funding for Weekend Concert, one of ences for some of the 16.67 percent of students, the larger cuts made to the marginalized groups on which will secure tickets SPB budget. campus get allocated,” for low-income students. junior and Senator Joey “We want to make Vettiankal said. “I think sure that everyone has WHERE DID that’s really important, that chance [to experi- MAJOR CUTS and I think a lot of the ence senior week and time how SU shows up senior trip] if they want TAKE PLACE? is not always evident. to because I think feel- And I know in the past ing a part of your class Most cuts were made we haven’t always shown is integral to your Wash. through combined efforts up for others, especially U. experience,” sopho- between Ragnone and marginalized students, so more Senator Carolyn the joint SU bodies to that’s a step in the right Perlmutter said. “There remove specific line-items direction.” shouldn’t be an economic throughout the budget. Leaders in Interpersonal 2018 barrier to that.” Beyond sophomore class Violence Education Freshman Senator Mia council and SPB, major (LIVE) received funding at Hamernik felt that on slashes came in the form over $2,000 for 13 separate EARLY BIRD socioeconomic equity of defunding the College events. While SU voted ought to be an objective Readership Program, to cut LIVE’s proposed for the entire session, decreasing funding for budget, which originally LEASING SPECIALS not just class council Category II student groups included 24 events total, it discussions. and decreasing the budget effectively increased LIVE “Something I try to for Trending Topics. funding from past years— Visit now for up to $300 be more conscientious “This year is the year more than doubling the of is students that come that we’ve had to cut the group’s programming in FREE RENT for WashU from lower income back- most out of the general abilities. grounds, because when budget,” Ragnone said. “I think that was the we’re dealing with several “We’re seeing a huge right decision not giving students & staff. million dollars and trying increase in the number them all 24,” junior and to allocate that, we need to of student groups and Speaker of the Senate keep in mind accessibility the number of funding Brian Adler said. “It’s • 1 mile from campus of the different things that requested year to year, so hard not giving a really • 1,2,3 bedroom apartments we are providing money looking into the appeals good group like LIVE • Fitness Center to,” Hamernik said. account and the student all the events that they • Leash Free Pet Park group budget reserves was want, but I still think we really important to look were able to find a good • Delmar &170 THE DEBATE holistically to see how we balance where they were • Washer/Dryer in units ON WILD can best accommodate the able to expand not at too • Amazing Specials & Student Incentives FUNDING rising demand for funds.” quick of a rate where • Super Pet Friendly The Collegiate they might crumble upon Readership Program, themselves.” • Garage Parking This year, Social which brings print edi- Block funding, decided • 24hr-Emergency Maintenance Programming Board’s tions of The New York prior to yesterday’s joint • Business center w/ free wifi, requested budget reflected Times, the Wall Street SU session, also saw a printing and study rooms intended shifts in pro- Journal and USA Today to large funding alloca- gramming, including campus, was funded at $0, tion. Totaling at over general budget allocation freeing up $49,000. $87,000, SU allocated for special programming While Ragnone block funding to Campus and an increase for WILD announced the cut in her Y, Emergency Support UP TO $300 IN FREE RENT talent by $25,000 per final budget proposal, she Team and Uncle Joe’s AND concert. In total, SPB promised the joint bodies Peer Counseling and requested $748,788.23 that she would look into Resource Center but cut DISCOUNTED RATES and was funded for a more affordable way to block funding for Habitat $641,037.89. bring a similar program to for Humanity. Up to $50 off monthly rates + preferred SPB requested an Washington University’s “Senate and Treasury employer/student/military discounts. increased budget for book- campus. did very well,” Ragnone ing WILD talent to raise “I’m going to get in con- said. “I think they had a the caliber of the artists tact with The New York lot of great conversation THEDISTRICTSTLOUIS.COM at each concert. Senate Times tomorrow and get a around the events and I and Treasury voted with a more cost-effective option think we have a budget (314) 236-5281 recommendation to fund on the table,” Ragnone that we are all really proud one WILD at $125,000, said. of.” MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 HANUSIA HIGGINS & KATY HUTSON | SENIOR SCENE EDITORS | [email protected] STUDENT LIFE 3 SCENE The digital life: From technicolor to black and white HANUSIA HIGGINS CEO Mark Zuckerberg, who the most love/hate relation- and first saw the ruined screen forth several times over the the colorful status quo. SENIOR SCENE EDITOR recently announced that ship of my life thus far: the in the harsh, fluorescent glow week that I’ve “gone gray.” Would I recommend the social media platform iPhone. of Schnucks. My heart raced, The grayscale mode is pretty setting your phone screen Last week, I was idly scroll- would show users more I bought an iPhone primar- my palms sweat and my eyes functional for text-based to grayscale? In a word, yes. ing through my Facebook content from friends and less ily as an effort to fit in at welled with tears. applications, but it’s not very It’s a quick and by no means feed in an attempt to avoid from pages and advertisers, Wash. U. In the luxurious A fresh screen and a year fun to use when scrolling permanent switch; if it helps doing work (as I often do) ensuring that users’ time modern dorms of the South later, I’m as busy and as through Instagram—which, I you focus, or just take one when I came across a New on Facebook is “time well 40, my significantly lower addicted to my phone, as guess, is the point. Switching less impulsive glance at the York Times headline that spent”—which also happens economic status among my I’ve ever been. So, when a back out of grayscale is dis- technicolor wonderland of sufficiently shocked me into to be the name of Harris’ more affluent peers wasn’t life-hack, why-not-try-it trick concerting, even unpleasant distraction that lives in your clicking on it. It posed the nonprofit foundation. immediately obvious, but it surfaced in my life in the form at first, but it only takes a few screen, then I think it’s worth question, “Is the Answer to “Time well spent” is pretty manifested itself in subtle of this article, I decided that seconds for me to readjust to it. Phone Addiction a Worse much the opposite of how I ways. My poorly disguised enough was enough and took Phone?” spend time online. I primarily shock when I first heard my the plunge. I initially assumed that the use the Internet as an avoid- friends conversing casually The initial switch to article would promote a tech- ance tactic and distraction about their fabulous interna- grayscale mode was jarring: nically “worse” model than from my real-life problems. tional vacations was one tell; I felt like Dorothy in reverse, the ubiquitous iPhone, like There are certainly many being unable to use iMessage whisked away from the Oz the Unihertz Jelly, a splashy wonderful facets of the online was another. So, I decided I of Technicolor apps and How to switch your phone new mini-smartphone. But world, including parts of would join the club in at least notifications and dropped screen to grayscale instead, it proposed a simple social media. But for me, this the one way I could, by buy- unceremoniously into a world switch within my existing technological relationship has ing an older-model iPhone on painted solely in shades of infrastructure: viewing my largely become an unhealthy eBay and finally being able to gray. But I, like Dorothy, iPhone 1. Open the Settings app phone screen in grayscale. one. The fact that I can access experience the socially con- made that choice, and I perse- 2. Go to General > Accessibility On paper, this change it constantly, instantly, even forming satisfaction of those vered with it for longer than I 3. Go to Display Accommodations > Color seems deceptively simple. But obsessively through the phone cool blue text bubbles. expected. Filters put in action, it prompted a in my pocket only exacerbates In the honeymoon stage I found my phone easier to 4. Turn Color Filters ‘On’ and check fundamental difference in the the problem. of our relationship, my ignore in grayscale mode, no ‘Grayscale’ way that I interacted with my I wasn’t always like this: attachment to my phone was doubt about it. When I glance phone. I was the last of my friends pretty healthy: It was a cool, at it out of habit, no bright Bonus tip: To make grayscale mode a shortcut, The impetus to “go gray” to get a cell phone (I got fun novelty that I enjoyed colors are there to grab my scroll to the bottom of the Accessibility menu seems to have originated mine on my first day of high using. But when I dropped attention—most notably, the and choose your Accessibility Shortcut to be with Tristan Harris, who has school), and for many years, my phone into a puddle at cleverly contrasting notifica- Color Filters. You’ll be able to toggle between been dubbed “the closest this first, Spartan device the end of my first semester tion bubbles. Although my grayscale and color mode by triple-clicking the thing Silicon Valley has to served only the most utilitar- and had to go without for apps’ color schemes don’t home button. a conscience” and spent ian of functions. A few years several weeks, it wasn’t a big seem too vivid when I have three years at Google as the later, I upgraded to a low-end deal. Then, two years down nothing to compare them Android company’s Design Ethicist, smartphone, and the narrow the line, I dropped my phone to, in contrast to black-and- The setting varies between phones, but most whatever that means. These opening through which I again, cracking the screen so white, they’re startlingly Android devices can enable the grayscale mode days, he’s working on his could view and interact with dramatically that the device saturated: the primary colors in the accessibility settings. own initiative, the Center the digital world expanded, was rendered unusable. This of Google, the colorblocking for Humane Technology, just a little bit. But it wasn’t time around, my attachment of Slack, the canary yellow of and seems to have the ear of until a few weeks into my had grown to the point where Snapchat, the ombre sunset many tech and Internet titans. first year at Washington I had a physical reaction palette of Instagram. This includes Facebook University that I bought into when I picked up my phone I’ve toggled back and

I tried to exercise and this is what happened: A Yoga Sculpt class review

MAISIE HEINE was pumping, and everyone wrong direction. Although I didn’t know of the back wall, all eyes a song as your alarm in the STAFF WRITER was already in downward Then, I realized everyone it then, this was still the were turned toward me. Or morning and then whenever dog position. The room was else had weights by their warm-up. at least, that was how it felt. you hear it in a store or a I was running late. So, nearly full. I contemplated side. I jumped up and went After some more arm And let me tell you, after restaurant, you automatically I started jogging from the leaving when I couldn’t find to the closet to get a couple, workouts that I, with my about five of those burpee start cringing a little? Well, Village. a yoga mat in the closet, but but all of the lighter weights overweight weights, could cycles from hell, my body now, whenever I hear “What “I’m already warming then, I found a lonely one were already taken. The only not even dream of accom- was really doing its own do you Mean,” I will prob- up!” I thought. “I’m going to rolled up on the studio floor. ones they had left were one plishing, the song ended, and thing. And when I say doing ably burst into tears. be at the top of my game for Since there was no room to 8-pounder and plenty of 10- our instructor asked how we its own thing, I don’t mean It’s difficult to express how this class!” go next to anyone, I spread and 12-pounders. I probably were feeling. doing burpees. I’m pretty happy I am to say that that I was headed to Yoga my mat out in the very back had tried working out with “Ummmm I’m pretty sure I was just jumping in the was the climax of the work- Sculpt, one of the free of the room— perpendicular weights three times in my much done, thanks for air before plummeting to the out and that things started to classes offered at the Sumers to everyone else’s—so that entire life. asking,” I thought (but also ground and staying there for cool down a little—read: a Recreation Center. I had when I laid down, I was fac- “Welp,” I thought. probably said out loud to two minutes, then somehow little—after that. been to kickboxing class ing the side wall instead of “There’s no rule saying myself in the heat of my forcing myself to get vertical We finished with some before, but that was about it. the front, where the instruc- that you can’t mix and aggravation). before plummeting again. Shavasana, the part at the I was going off the recom- tor was. match, right?” I took the “Well, get ready to kick it I thanked sweet Jesus end of the yoga session mendation of a friend. She I was already sole 8-pound weight and a up a notch!” she said, before Mary Mother of God when where you get to lie flat on told me that if I was look- headed in 10-pound weight and went turning the volume of the that combination FINALLY your back for a few minutes ing for traditional yoga, the back to my mat with what next EDM song to the max ended. “As long as I don’t for relaxation purposes, aka I should look elsewhere. turned out to be great timing, setting and skipping to the have to do any more bur- the best part of the session. This class is not about since everyone had just start- front of the room. She started pees,” I thought, “I can make Talk about 100 to 0. finding your breath. It’s ing using the weights for the demonstrating a new set of it through the rest of this Overall, if you are looking more about losing it. next routine. We were doing moves that involved doing class.” for the kind of yoga where I walked in. The a move where we started four squat jumps forward on “Who’s ready for more you find your center and music off with both our arms in L the mat, a burpee and a jump burpees?!!!!!” Our instructor reconnect with your body, shapes, raised to the height twist so that we were facing yelled before the next song this is not the class for you. If, of our heads, lifting our the opposite wall and were came on, full blast. It was however, you are looking for arms straight up into the air ready to start doing the squat Justin Bieber’s “What do you a workout that will kick you before returning back to the jumps all over again while Mean?” As the verse came butt, and then kick it again, L. The move seemed simple facing the other direction. It on, she started to jump from and then beat it repeatedly enough. I did about five and was like watching an endless side to side. Then, when the with a bat before tossing it off then was dead. The differ- butt-fat-burning cycle from chorus began—“What do the side of a building, then ent size weights were just hell. you mean?”— the class did a Yoga Sculpt is the one you not working. Meanwhile, I Now, because my mat was burpee. And then a second. want! was amazed by how in sync perpendicular to everyone And then a third. Every time Seriously though, this is a everyone else seemed with else’s and in the back of the the Biebs said “What do you great workout for people who the instructor. room, whenever everyone Mean?” we did a burpee. get high off of high-intensity The music was at a pretty twisted around to start squat Every. Single. Time. reps. I recommend it to the ILLUSTRATION BY JOSH ZUCKER low level at this point. jumping toward the direction You know when you use burpee lovers among us!

VOLUME 139, NO. 38

Ella Chochrek Rohan Gupta Josh Zucker Zachary Berman Ray Bush Copyright © 2018 Washington Editor-in-Chief Jon Lewis Design Chief Video Editor General Manager University Student Media, [email protected] Senior Sports Editors [email protected] [email protected] Inc. (WUSMI). Student Life [email protected] Elena Quinones is a financially and editorially Aaron Brezel Jeremy Goldstein Social Media Editor Claire Martin independent, student-run Aidan Strassmann Hanusia Higgins Elizabeth Grossman Advertising Manager newspaper serving the Noa Yadidi Katy Hutson Copy Chiefs Emma Baker [email protected] Washington University Managing Editors Senior Scene Editors [email protected] Elena Quinones community. Our newspaper is [email protected] News Editors a publication of WUSMI and Danielle Drake-Flam Wesley Jenkins does not necessarily represent Olivia Szymanski Ali Gold Director of Special Projects Lauren Alley the views of the Washington Senior News Editors Senior Cadenza Editor Copy Editor University administration. [email protected] [email protected] Ethan Jaynes Online Editor Katy Hutson Aidan Strassmann Jordan Chow Tyler Sabloff Senior Forum Editor Jiyoon Kang Ali Gold Designers [email protected] Senior Photo Editors Social Media Director [email protected] 4 STUDENT LIFE ROHAN GUPTA & JON LEWIS | SENIOR SPORTS EDITORS | [email protected] MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 SPORTS Men’s tennis frustrated by Chicago at indoor nationals, again

JON LEWIS indoor nationals left a seasons. individual matchups in SENIOR SPORTS EDITOR sour taste for the Bears, The match got off to a six matches leading up to the weekend started off rocky start for the Bears. indoor nationals. In their Last season, the well. Wash. U., ranked Two doubles pairs—Wu semifinal matchup, they Washington University sixth in Division III, were and sophomore Bernardo only narrowly lost to No. 1 men’s tennis team was favored in their quar- Neves and freshman Ben Emory University. up against a wall in the terfinal matchup Friday van der Sman and sopho- While Kozlowski and third-place match of the against No. 11 University more J.J. Kroot—lost their Li were the only doubles ITA Indoor National of Redlands, and they matchups very quickly. team to win the day before, Championships but just showed why, jumping out This meant that with their they were the only Wash. managed to squeak out to a 3-0 lead after doubles. match tied 5-5, junior U. duo to lose Sunday, as a 5-4 win over Carnegie The highlight of the Konrad Kozlowski and Neves and freshman Mark Mellon University. day in singles was senior freshman Daniel Li found Wu and van der Sman Sunday afternoon in Johnny Wu’s win at No. themselves the only pair and Kroot both picked up Minneapolis, Minn. the 1 singles. Wu, person- still playing. victories. Bears found themselves ally unranked this year With all eyes on them, Despite having a 2-1 lead on the other side of a 5-4 despite coming off a sea- Kozlowski and Li gave after doubles this time, the decision, as the University son in which he qualified the Bears a foothold in Bears once again could of Chicago’s Charlie Pei for the NCAA individual the match. After a break only muster two wins held off Wash. U.’s fresh- championships, powered gave them a 7-6 lead DAN JOHNSON | INTERCOLLEGIATE TENNIS ASSOCIATION man Koki Takabatake his way to a 6-3, 6-2 win and a chance to clinch, in singles, with Wu and Sophomore Bernardo Amaral Neves cheers after scoring 7-6, 7-6, and they lost to over Chase Lipscomb, the Kozlowski made no mis- Neves the only two players during the ITA Indoor National Championships this weekend. the Maroons at the same fifth-ranked player in the take in a dominant final to register singles victories third-place match at ITAs, some more lineup change tournament for the second division. Wu’s win along service game and the duo on the day. Takabakate’s they would have needed a in the future. straight year. with the sweep of doubles took the match 8-6. match was the last to finish doubles sweep to win with Wash. U. has next week- The loss to Chicago was set the tone for a resound- Wash. U., however, with the scores knotted at the same singles results. end off, but then faces a particularly smarting for ing 9-0 shutout victory for would be unable to over- 4-4, and the freshman was Going forward, the daunting spring break trip the Bears for two reasons. the Bears. turn the 1-2 deficit in unable to fight off match Bears will need to find a to California in which Firstly, Chicago is Wash. Saturday’s match would singles. By the time Wu point in the second set. few more wins in singles they will face at least U.’s most constant rival: prove to be a little trickier, lost a marathon three-set- The loss to Chicago to beat the top teams. It three ranked Division III Sunday’s match was the as Wash. U. faced No. 2 ter 6-7, 6-4, 6-3, CMS had broke an almost-year-long seems that head coach schools and Division I fourth time the two teams Claremont-Mudd-Scripps already clinched with three trend for the Bears. Since Roger Follmer is still shuf- Lehigh University. Despite have faced off since Feb. (CMS). CMS—composed other singles wins. Neves a 6-3 loss to Claremont fling his deck a little bit, another loss to Chicago, 25, 2017, and counting of athletes from Claremont and Kroot were the only last March, Wash. U. had and he changed his singles the Bears will actually this most recent game the McKenna College, Harvey players to win in singles for played 20 matches and lineup in between every hope that this season actu- series is now an even 2-2 Mudd College and Scripps the Bears, and Claremont were undefeated when match at indoor nationals. ally continues to mirror over this period. Secondly, College—is a perennial took the match 6-3. they had taken the lead in Seniors Shaun Berman and the last one, in which: Wash. U.’s loss in the Division III powerhouse That semifinal loss set doubles. In the past two Jason Haugen and junior They lost to the Maroons third-place match comes but traditionally does up a rematch in the third- seasons, two doubles wins Radha Vishnubhotla were at indoors, then had some a year to the day after not participate in indoor place match with Chicago. has almost always been all regular contributors success over a tough Chicago beat them 7-2 in nationals; they appeared The Maroons were red-hot enough for the Bears to last season and missed spring break, and lastly got last year’s semi-final. in the tournament this year coming in the tournament, secure a win, though in this weekend with various revenge with two wins over While the ending of for the first time in nine only dropping two total both the semifinal and the ailments, so expect to see Chicago.

DAN JOHNSON | INTERCOLLEGIATE TENNIS ASSOCIATION GRACE BRUTON | STUDENT LIFE The men’s tennis team huddles up at the ITA Indoor National Championships in Minneapolis, Sophomore JJ Kroot hits the ball during a match last season. The Bears fell to University of Minn. this weekend. The Bears finished fourth in the tournament after finishing third last year. Chicago this weekend, coming a year after Chicago defeated the team 7-2 in the semi-finals.

Trouble in the Windy City: Men’s, women’s basketball lose in Chicago ROHAN GUPTA AND pulled ahead, however, the third quarter came to play. did a lot of damage from University of Rochester JON LEWIS largely thanks to the scor- a close, setting up a tense Lake missed both from the line, scoring 30 points (No. 16) and Illinois SENIOR SPORTS EDITORS ing of guard Mia Farrell finale. the line, and Sondag off of foul shots. The Wesleyan University (No. who had 12 in the half. Chicago managed to was fouled off the ball Maroons had a huge 22-8 20) and a close losses to Both Washington The Maroons ended the maintain that distance on the second miss, giv- margin in turnovers, and Rochester and Chicago. University basketball first half with five unan- through the fourth, ing her a chance to cut their press gave the Wash. Working against them: teams traveled to Chicago swered points. though the Bears would the Maroons’ lead to just U. ball-handlers night- Seven losses, including for a doubleheader Chicago stretched the not go away and nearly three without burning any mares all day. a bad two weeks at New UAA finale against the lead to as many as 18 got back into the game time. Sondag, an excellent Wash. U. now sits York University. University of Chicago points midway through with less than a minute three-point shooter, hits firmly on the bubble for The men, meanwhile, Saturday. The two games the third quarter on to play. With 19 seconds just 64 percent from the the NCAA tournament. In looked to sweep a Chicago had greatly different a layup from Marissa left on the clock, junior line and saw her first free- their favor: Wins against squad it had beaten by a stakes for the two teams: Igunbor. The Bears forward Caroline Ballard throw come up short, and ranked teams like Depauw The women needed a win mounted a bit of come- nailed a pull-up three to with it the Bears’ chances. University (No. 6), SEE CHICAGO, PAGE 9 to boost their odds of back down 50-65 with two cut the deficit to 89-94. Chicago’s final total of securing a playoff berth, minutes left in the quarter, With Wash. U. forced to 96 was largely inflated while the men had already ignited by another three foul, Chicago’s Taylor by the free-throw game wrapped up a conference from Sondag. Wash. U. Lake stepped to the line at the end of the fourth, title with only the pride outscored Chicago 8-1 as with just ten seconds to though to their credit they of winning a rivalry game on the line. Both teams, however, came up short against Chicago squads that had other plans. The women came into the last game of the sea- son needing a win against a Maroons team that was about as hot as they come. Chicago was ranked No. 10 in Division III, and had not lost a game since Nov. 21. They were in the midst of a 20-game winning streak, and on average were outscoring oppo- nents by nearly 18 points. The Bears took the lead only once in the game, on a first quarter three- GRACE BRUTON | STUDENT LIFE GRACE BRUTON | STUDENT LIFE pointer by junior guard Senior Shelby Mann chases after the ball in the Bears’ game against Carnegie Mellon Senior Kevin Kucera handles the ball in the Bears’ last UAA Rachael Sondag. Chicago University Feb. 18. The Red and Green are currently awaiting NCAA tournament seeding. match of the season, a loss to rival University of Chicago. MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 ALI GOLD | SENIOR CADENZA EDITOR | [email protected] STUDENT LIFE 5 CADENZA I like ‘Lady Bird’ too much to not write about it before the Oscars

PRANAYA PAHWA banished all of us to a train to colleges, leaving your suburbs as well. Her desire STAFF WRITER museum—a terrible train mark, making the most of to fly away mimicked my museum—for like a year your limited time? Now own. What Lady Bird feels, “Lady Bird” opens with or something (two hours) you don’t need to. Gerwig I too have felt. a quotation from Joan to preserve her own sanity. recreates it brilliantly. The Gerwig’s film is truly Didion: “Anybody who The trip was a disaster. film’s understanding of about observation and love. talks about California Despite this, I remember life and people surpasses We get so caught up in our hedonism has never spent a our vacation clearly and even the most empathetic heads and our lives that we Christmas in Sacramento.” more importantly, fondly. films. Plus, the writing is forget that truly magical I have spent a Christmas I remember eating mini- spectacular. and spiritual experience in Sacramento, Calif. It was donuts, having dinner at a Many of the film’s of living with the oth- awful. I did not like a single P.F. Changs, watching the warmest and most insight- ers around us. Lady Bird part of it. I often tell my movie “Tintin” (criminally ful moments come from learns to care for others friends California would be underrated), walking by how it observes and cares more seriously and in the perfect if we just got rid of our hotel and yes, even vis- for all of its characters. process, we do as well. She the city repulsively known iting the godawful exhibits The way a mother lingers also learns that liking and as Sac-town. I sometimes at the train museum. I in an open house, a teacher loving are not the same. joke the best part of any guess even though I didn’t nervously fidgets or a Lady Bird’s mother loves visit to Sacramento is leav- really like our vacation, I father fixes his son’s tie all Lady Bird but doesn’t ing for home. sort of fell in love with it. affect deeply. The film’s always like her. Lady Bird My mom wanted to These meandering attention to detail and hates Sacramento but also take us all for a Christmas thoughts closely relate to appreciation of the every- loves it. Leaving the the- vacation but my dad had “Lady Bird.” For me, it is day brilliance of people ater, I wanted to be a better, just started his business. useless to discuss the film and places astounds. more considerate adult. Sacramento was cheap without personal experi- This truly unique film More shockingly, I wanted and just a two-hour drive ence because the film is so makes every character and to revisit Sacramento and away. Why not, right? Here personal. “Lady Bird” is moment feel real; as if the give it another chance. is why not: Christmas humanizing and nothing characters live full and All performances on and in Sacramento is dead. short of genius; earning wonderful lives outside of off screen are excellent. Yes, deader even than it the prestigious position what we see on screen. Saoirse Ronan plays Lady Sacramento during the rest of my favorite movie of That is where the per- Bird with all the insecurity role, the performance and a lot to me. I can’t really of the year. all time (which is basically sonal connections return. and meanness you expect, writing add lifelike nuance. explain it. Some movies To this day, my mom the equivalent of an Oscar Lady Bird’s mother is, at and a sweetness you The true standout, though, you just fall in love with. is relentlessly teased by and should make it on the times, my mom; her father, didn’t. Tracy Letts, Beanie is Laurie Metcalf as Lady For me, “Lady Bird” is that the rest of the family for IMDB page). at times, my dad. I grew up Feldstein, Lucas Hedges, Bird’s mother. She is film. I love it completely. her poor trip planning. Greta Gerwig’s master- middle class and Lady Bird Timothee Chalamet, outstanding. Her longing, Every time I watch it, it Needless to say, we com- piece is a coming-of-age does too. I understand her Lois Smith and Stephen love and exhaustion are etches its way in my heart. plained a lot. At one point, classic. Remember the anx- California suburbs because Henderson all delight. touching. Greta Gerwig, thank you my mom had enough. She iety of senior year, applying I lived in California No matter how small the Gerwig’s film means for a beautiful film.

‘The Post’ fails to capture magnitude of historical turning point

PRANAYA PAHWA way. The cast is ridicu- is genuinely thrilling, However, “The Post” something—a message, a Spielberg premiered his STAFF WRITER lously strong. The film has dramatic and funny. The is not essential. It adds feeling, anything. It can- film in theaters just nine bona fide acting legends kinetic camera work and nothing to the national not convey that without a months after he read the The individual talents (Meryl Streep and Tom editing excite, the score discussion, and its self- necessarily effective sto- script. He explained his behind “The Post” lift a Hanks), 2017 all-stars thrills and the acting is congratulatory attitude rytelling technique. “The hurried pace simply: “This dead script from its grave. (Michael Stuhlberg and superb. More often than derails its own thematic Post’s” premise is strong, couldn’t wait.” The film Unfortunately, no one Tracy Letts), current not however, “The Post” aspirations. While watch- but its execution is weak. certainly resonates in the remembers to revive it. television giants (Sarah disappoints. The film ing the film, I groaned out Almost every storytell- current political climate. “The Post” details Paulson, Allison Brie, Bob tries and fails to evoke loud twice. ing decision results in Regrettably, however, the the Washington Post’s Odenkirk, Matthew Rhys responses it has not Look, I like the indi- maximum cliche and yawn film reflects the haste with acquisition and decision and Bradley Whitford) earned. viduals behind “The factor. It is the sort of film which it was made. “The to publish the Pentagon and television standouts Shots are held a few sec- Post.” Though I support which has an unnecessary Post” just isn’t good. The Papers, classified govern- (Carrie Coon, Zachary onds too long, attracting the film’s message, that Vietnam sequence with film’s success and critical ment documents detailing Woods, David Cross and attention to themselves, does not make it good art. a rock and roll musical acclaim demonstrates a the history of the United Jesse Plemons). The crew and therefore losing their There must be a distinction accompaniment, a man timely infatuation with its States’ involvement in behind the camera is impact. Character arcs between good stories and reading damning lines ideas and not a genuine Vietnam. In doing so, the also phenomenal: Steven are sudden and unnatural. good storytelling. I would from documents out loud appreciation of its craft. film explores the impor- Spielberg directs, John Tom Hanks gets a hero- go even further and say to himself and that classic “The Post” covers a tance of the Fourth Estate Williams composes and shot for recognizing that that good and bad stories movie moment where a crucial event in American and the bravery of those Janusz Kaminski manages women in the workplace don’t exist. There is only guy is stealing something history with a rather hack- willing to speak truth to cinematography. face institutional barriers. good and bad storytell- and acts suspicious in front neyed approach. The topic power. The sheer talent behind The movie seems to think ing with good and bad of a kind, but clueless, is important but the film is From the start, “The the film ensures that it is essential because it messages. security guard. That’s just not—no matter how many Post” has a lot going its “The Post,” at times, discusses important issues. Every story must convey the first five minutes. times it tells you it is. 6 STUDENT LIFE MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018

WAIT, WHAT HAPPENED?

WE’LL TELL YOU. — STUDENT LIFE MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 STUDENT LIFE 7

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FOR RELEASE FEBRUARY 26, 2018

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2/26/18 Thursday’s Puzzle Solved

SOLUTION TO THURSDAY’S PUZZLE

2018 2/26/18

2/26/18 2018 8 STUDENT LIFE AIDAN STRASSMANN | SENIOR FORUM EDITOR | [email protected] MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 FORUM STAFF EDITORIAL Put the car back in CarShare ast week, Student left in each car to refuel if out across West Campus, to parking on campus— buses, MetroLink light-rail shared resource. It’s disap- Life reported needed. the Medical School, North including the revocation system and Call-A-Ride pointing and embarrassing that Washington While the program sounds Campus and the Donald of parking privileges for paratransit service, more cars for college-aged individuals LUniversity would good on paper, in practice, Danforth Plant Center. sophomores—students will give students alternative to not pick up after them- be renewing its CarShare students are underserved by For the overwhelming need additional cars now ways to explore the St. Louis selves. It’s also imperative partnership with Enterprise. the implementation of the majority of undergraduate more than ever. Associate metropolitan region, bursting that CarShare users report, In theory, the CarShare CarShare program on cam- students, cars not kept on Vice Chancellor for Student the oft-criticized “Wash. U. on the program’s website or program is great for stu- pus. CarShare is riddled with the or Affairs Rob Wild told bubble.” app, when cars have any sort dents—for only $5 an hour, flaws—spanning from an South 40 are difficult to get Student Life in September In addition to the lack of of mechanical problem. students can rent one of insufficient number of cars to to without incurring extra 2016 that both due to park- cars, the vehicles available Having a car sharing the cars parked in multiple a lack of maintenance—all costs through Uber trips just ing changes implemented are rarely clean or free of program is a major advantage locations around campus to of which are easily solvable to get to the cars themselves, this year and to provide an functional problems. Almost for students, serving as a use to their hearts’ content. problems that, if fixed, would which defeats the purpose option for students without always, students are met with cost-effective and convenient While rental cars typically make a big difference for the of CarShare as an affordable cars, the University would a previous users’ trash or alternative to owning a car require a driver be 25 years program. option. consider adding more car even broken seatbelts. While or using expensive rideshare old or older, the CarShare Currently, Wash. U. has And it can be near-impos- sharing options. However, the University could add services such as Uber or Lyft. program is open to all Wash. 25 cars in nine different loca- sible to find an available car no changes have been made more maintenance checks to Adding more cars to meet U. students aged 18 and up tions. Of the nine locations, on campus. If a student is all year. ensure cars are in working the existing demand will only with a valid driver’s license. five Danforth Campus or able to find a car, it it not Similar to the U-Pass pro- order, ultimately, having a car increase the student experi- Students also don’t need to South 40 locations count uncommon for it to be at an gram, which gives students sharing program is a privilege ence and students’ ability to worry about paying for gas, 19 cars among them. The obscure or inconvenient time. the ability to ride public for students—and it is incum- immerse themselves in St. as they can use credit cards remaining six cars are spread But with the recent changes transportation like Metro bent upon us to respect this Louis.

Turn fraternity housing over to minorities and women

MATTHEW WALLACE occasional Black or Latinx Well, I say it is time for them U., they know where we include the sexual assaults women, I see no reason why STAFF WRITER member roaming their sticky to put up or shut up. Anyone stand—but they also know that the University is ill- we should continue to provide halls, but every group that can generate long reports and where we fall: designating equipped to properly handle prime space for any fraternity. efore you think oppresses others needs that come up with long-term plans, space for its minority students. or the racist practices that are Wash. U. is laughably behind about emailing one example showing how but what are you doing right Northwestern University, touted as “tradition” or are peer institutions in providing me or Student progressive they are, or as now? There are obstacles that the University of Chicago, justified because “we have a space for minorities and will BLife telling us how Zora Neale Hurston famously will take years to properly Stanford University, the Black brother.” You may say continue to be as long as the this article is reactionary to said, “all my skinfolk ain’t kin- fix, but there are also ones Massachusetts Institute it’s “only a few bad apples” University doesn’t make the the guns found on campus or folk.” These “brotherhoods” that are more immediate and of Technology, Harvard but take a look at what that success of its most vulnerable why your fraternity isn’t like have done nothing but occupy will demonstrate to minority University, Tufts University, really means. The full quote students a priority. You never those rowdy hooligans from valuable space and make students that you are serious Georgetown University, is “a few bad apples spoils see stories about a college “the football frat,” just know the University feel unsafe for about change. Go for the low Cornell University, Brown the barrel.” So, when one (or finally attaining a record num- I started writing this article a many. In order to remediate hanging fruit—the lowest of University, the University several) of you do something ber of wealthy, white male week before the permanent the damage they have caused, which is providing spaces of Pennsylvania and Yale horrible, the moment you groups on campus or about suspension of Phi Delta Washington University should for minorities and women University all have spaces for excuse or ignore it in the name how they had to fight tooth Theta. convert fraternity housing into on campus. If the safety and students of color, while Duke of “brotherhood,” you are all and nail for the tiniest bit of Washington University living spaces for minorities success of minorities and University has two. If we truly forever tainted. When you join space to call their own. has a pathetic history when it and women. women is a real priority for want our university to be a an organization, its reputation By taking the bold and comes to appropriately disci- The University recently the University, then they can national powerhouse, then our is now your reputation. Saying necessary step in standing up plining fraternities for hazing, released a two-year, 12-point move heaven and earth to leaders need to look past the “I’ll speak up next time” keeps to the white, male supremacy sexual assault and harassment, plan for creating a more make sure something is done endowment and start investing your nose away from smelling that is fraternities and giv- racist practices and violating inclusive and diverse commu- right now. in what remains the weakest the rotting barrel that is your ing space to minorities and any pre-existing watered-down nity. With this report and the In his tenure as chancel- part. fraternity. women, Wash. U. will have punishment. Fraternities are constant talk about diversity, lor, Mark Wrighton has Now, to the fraternities: As most fraternities do little truly taken the steps to becom- a perfect representation of we can say that not only does brought Wash. U. onto the Student Life recently detailed actual good to the University ing a real leader in the world. the type of person who has University leadership know cusp of national prominence. a partial timeline of negative community, are regularly held The past was only white and power and influence over the there is a problem, but they’re Although not as recogniz- fraternity-related incidents unaccountable for their actions male, the future is diverse. University: white, wealthy willing to devote time, energy able as peer institutions, if since 1993. This list is far and make the University Wash. U.: don’t be on the and male. You may find the and resources to fixing it. someone knows about Wash. from complete, and does not unsafe for minorities and wrong side of history again.

Dear Olympians: I could do that JEN MCLISH triple cork 1440. If you aren’t a muscle before I even start Olympics like clockwork. I love the Olympics is that and something called a STAFF WRITER familiar with snowboarding’s down the mountain, I would Since every Olympian (with they make me feel like I, McTwist. Unless Student esoteric naming conventions, probably break every bone a few exceptions) has already too, can slide very fast down Life’s readership has finally he Olympics are that’s four complete clockwise in my body trying to imitate proved themselves to be near a mountain, hurl myself in expanded to the galactic over. The snow is spins, completed while invert- an Olympian. But even superhuman just by making the air and spin around an market, or there was a mix-up melting, athletes ing his body so that his head though my brain knows the it to the games, the baseline improbable number of times and you found this paper at T are going home and shoulders fell below his only move I’m capable of is for an “average” performance before the landing pulverizes the front of your cave instead and (presumably) someone board three separate times. an air-to-funeral, my heart is astronomically high. The my knees. Kim’s back-to-back of Cryptid Weekly, you’re is converting the luge course The athleticism necessary is absolutely certain that middle of the Olympic pack 1080s on the halfpipe were human, too. Keep thinking “I into the world’s best water just to complete the trick— if someone took me to the becomes the new normal, beautiful to watch for their could do that,” even though slide. I, however, am not quite not to mention survive the X-Games and pointed at the and in this, we couch potatoes own sake, but they also filled it doesn’t make any sense. Go ready to leave Pyeongchang landing—is incalculable. But half pipe, I could give Chloe see ourselves. If the point me with so much frantic ice skating. Try a backflip. behind. For the past few here’s the thing: I’m pretty Kim a run for her money. of the games is to showcase energy that I had to immedi- Enter a vegan hot dog eating weeks, I was entranced. I pro- sure I could do it. There’s an easy answer to the unbelievable, unattain- ately go to the gym or explode contest. Do something dumb crastinated homework with Obviously, I could not the question of why I have able talent of the athletes, from the pressure of excess and ridiculous just to remind speed skating. The rhythm of do it. Despite picking up delusions of snowboard- then assigning some poor adrenaline on top of a critical yourself that we’re all capable cross-country skiing lulled me snowboarding at 11 years ing grandeur: I’m an idiot. soul the task of humiliating density of useless snowboard- of more than we think (and to sleep at night. I watched old, I was 16 before I worked As @michellebhasin on themselves to remind us all ing terminology. A week because you’re human and skeleton for hours, first out of up the courage to try a 50-50 Twitter put it, “Before every of our place (hint: it’s not later, I’m still fantasizing. My alive and a little bit of an curiosity, then for the same on a box—fancy language Olympic event they should in Pyeongchang) is a great brain even compromised with idiot). Also, remember that reasons you might watch a for riding straight over a flat send out one average person idea. The stack of waivers my heart and agreed to try a I and Student Life cannot be horror movie. But the sport surface. If my board leaves to perform the upcoming these sacrifices would have to jump, although whether my held liable for any injury you that captivated me most, as the snow for longer than half event. To fall on their face. sign would be high enough body will cooperate remains may receive in the process of always, was snowboarding. a second, I consider it an Completely fail. Just so those to serve as the new ski jump to be seen. following my terrible advice. During the first week of unhappy accident. I don’t like of us at home who watch the ramp, but who wouldn’t risk Yes, everything Olympic Please contact my lawyer the games, Redmond Gerard to ride too fast, turning on Olympics and think ‘I could a little death for the Olympic athletes do is insane—and with any complaints because awed the world when he won steep slopes gives me anxiety do that’ realize we can’t. We spotlight? shouldn’t be possible—but I’ll be on the mountain, prac- gold in the snowboard slope- and my worst snowboarding really can’t.” Obviously, Olympic ath- the point of the games is that ticing my boardslides. Maybe style event at just 17 years old. accident was a humiliating The idea of having a desig- letes are stunningly talented, it is possible. Those are real you’ll even see me at the next Among other things, his win- wipeout while trying to get nated Average Joe compete is and their talent is fun to humans landing quadruple Olympics. Probably not. But ning run included a backside off a chair lift. If I can tear an old joke that pops up every marvel at. But the reason lutzes and triple backflips maybe. OUR VOICE: YOUR VOICE: OUR WEB EDITORIAL BOARD SUBMISSIONS POLICY

Staff editorials reflect the consensus Senior Sports Editors: Rohan Gupta, Jon We welcome letters to also submit longer op-eds Once an article is the editor and op-ed of up to 750 words. We published on studlife. of our editorial board. The editorial Lewis submissions from our reserve the right to print com, it will remain board operates independently of our Senior Scene Editors: Hanusia Higgins, newsroom and includes members of the readers. Submissions may any submission as a letter there permanently. We Katy Hutson senior staff and forum section editors. be sent to letters@studlife. or op-ed. Any submission do not remove articles Senior Cadenza Editor: Ali Gold com and must include chosen for publication does or authors’ names the writer’s name, class not necessarily reflect the from the site unless Editor-in-Chief: Ella Chochrek Copy Chiefs: Jeremy Goldstein, Elizabeth and phone number for opinions of Student Life, an agreement was Managing Editors: Grossman Aaron Brezel, Aidan verification. Letters should nor does publication mean reached prior to July 1, Director of Special Projects: Wesley Strassmann, Noa Yadidi be no longer than 350 words Student Life supports said 2005. Senior Forum Editor: Aidan Strassmann Jenkins in length, and readers may submission. MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 ROHAN GUPTA & JON LEWIS | SENIOR SPORTS EDITORS | [email protected] STUDENT LIFE 9 Men’s track and field claims UAA Indoor title, women place second

ROHAN GUPTA personal-best 4:13.28 time Chicago’s 138. SENIOR SPORTS EDITOR in the one-mile and junior Three women won Tim Goblirsch, with a individual titles—senior The Washington 4.36-meter height in the Annalise Wagner, who ran University men’s track pole vault. Eight Wash. a career-best 2:11.78 in and field team clinched U. men received all-UAA the 800-meter race, sopho- its 16th UAA title at the honors. more Paige Lawler, with a conference indoor cham- The women actually 7:20.42 mark in the 5,000- pionships this weekend scored more points than meter, and freshman Julia at Case Western Reserve their Red and Green coun- Dannenbaum, who match University. The women, terparts, 129, but their Goblirsch’s pole vault title meanwhile, finished sec- competition’s rankings with a 3.77-meter height of ond to the University of were also more top-heavy. her own. Ten total Wash. Chicago. While six men’s UAA U. women were honored as The Bears men snagged teams finished above 55 all-conference recipients. 120 points to top Carnegie points, four women’s For both teams, it’s Mellon University’s 106. squads managed fewer one more tune-up before No other team totaled even than 42. That imbalance the NCAA Indoor 70 points. Two Bears won led to three teams over 100 Championships the first SKYLER KESSLER | STUDENT LIFE event titles: sophomore points, including Wash. weekend of spring break Two members of the Bears’ relay team hand off the baton during the Washington University Nick Matteucci, with a U., which fell short of in Birmingham, Ala. Invite. This weekend, the women’s track team finished second,falling to University of Chicago.

CHICAGO from page 4 single point back on Jan. in double figures. The points on 9-of-18 shoot- 6 to kick off a 13-0 start output was also his low- ing and got to the line for in 2018. At the Ratner est since January 2016, a game-high eight free Athletics Center, however, during his sophomore sea- throws. His output was the Maroons would put an son, when he also scored divided evenly between end to that streak, beating four points in a matchup the two halves—16 and 15 the Bears 86-77. against Chicago. points apiece—as Chicago Senior guard Kevin Freshman guard Jack outscored Wash. U. by Kucera had 21 points, Nolan also had a rough five and four, respectively, matching a season high, contest, scoring six on in each period. and six assists to lead the 2-of-10 from the field. The men and women Red and Green. Senior He’s been shaky of will tune into the tour- forward Andrew Sanders, late; since a midseason nament selection shows meanwhile, was limited 11-game double-digit Monday at 11:30 a.m. and to 24 minutes by five scoring streak, Nolan has 1:30 p.m., respectively, personal fouls. Sanders reached the mark in just with placement the only had an uncharacteristi- two of eight games. mystery for the men and cally rough contest with The Maroons relied a 30-year streak of NCAA just four points on 1-of-6 mostly on Jake Fenlon playoff appearances hang- SKYLER KESSLER | STUDENT LIFE shooting, snapping his to carry the load, as he ing in the balance for the Junior Rachael Sondag looks to pass in the Bears’ game against Rochester. This weekend, the 34-game streak of scoring toasted the Bears for 31 women. women’s basketball team lost in their UAA finale to their division rival University of Chicago. 10 STUDENT LIFE DANIELLE DRAKE-FLAM & OLIVIA SZYMANSKI | SENIOR NEWS EDITORS | [email protected] MONDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 2018 Sam Seekings named next Student Life editor-in-chief

DANIELLE DRAKE-FLAM He began working for Student resume full editorship, over- ideas about online content, SENIOR NEWS EDITOR Life through Freshman Press, seeing biweekly productions and I’m excited to see him the paper’s pre-orientation at Student Life and handling implement them going for- Sam Seekings, a junior program, starting as a con- content in the paper. ward,” Chochrek said. “He’s from Oshkosh, Wis., has tributing reporter for the news As editor-in-chief Seekings done a lot of great work for been named the next editor- section and a design editor. hopes to promote a more paper in the past, and I think in-chief of Student Life for Seekings became senior news inclusive environment within he has a really great vision for the 2018-2019 academic year. editor in April 2017 and held the Student Life office. [Student Life].” Currently, Seekings is abroad the role through fall 2017. “One thing that I really According to Seekings, who in Copenhagen, Denmark; Seekings was a qualified want to focus on is trying to begins his role March 29 and however, he served as Student candidate for the position due create a more inclusive culture will continue as editor-in-chief Life’s senior news editor for to his strong background in on staff that welcomes diverse of Student Life through spring fall 2017. breaking news reporting, con- backgrounds and ideas,” 2019, he is excited to get to Seekings’ appointment tent creation and interviewing. Seekings said. work with staff, both old and was announced last Friday In his past positions at Student In addition, Seekings hopes new, and start implementing at the annual banquet hosted Life, Seekings has had the to increase paper’s online his new initiatives. by Washington University opportunity to interview upper presence. “I’m just really happy to be Student Media Inc., whose level administrators including “I also want to try to able to continue working with board of directors, comprised Chancellor Mark Wrighton increase Student Life’s online the wonderful Student Life primarily of alumni, oversees and Provost Holden Thorp. presence by increasing the staff to put out content that Student Life. Bill Freivogel, Because Seekings is cur- amount of multimedia and Washington University stu- president of the Washington rently abroad, he will be online-focused content we pro- dents care about and enjoy,” University Student Media, appointing an associate editor duce,” he said. Seekings said. “I think we’ve Inc., announced Seekings’ to handle the daily operations Current Editor-in-Chief and made real progress as a news- appointment. of the paper. He will also han- junior Ella Chochrek believes paper over the past year, and I MEGAN MAGRAY | STUDENT LIFE Seekings, 21, is majoring in dle personnel choices for his that Seekings is a great fit for really want to keep building on History and Psychology with staff. When Seekings returns the position. that progress by introducing Junior Sam Seekings, who was senior news editor of Student a minor in Text and Tradition. in the fall semester, he will “Sam has some really great some new initiatives.” Life for fall 2017, will serve as the paper’s next editor-in-chief.

PHI DELT from page 1 EAST END from page 1 whole,” the statement reads. speak to the fact that these Honesty, to establish train- the decision to permanently coincides with our 2018 to campus on Thursday and “Their actions were unac- are issues we’re addressing ings on masculinity and suspend Phi Delt, which was theme, ‘ThurtenE through the Friday of commencement to ceptable and have no place outside and show people that power for new members. announced Feb. 20. Years: Our Shared History,’ give our guests more opportu- in fraternity life at Wash. this is something that we take “We are taking more than “Essentially, there are two which focuses on the com- nity to have the parking spaces U.” seriously and something that just a statement...we are tak- really distinct issues that bined history of the carnival, that are on campus,” Early Sophomore and IFC we are trying to improve for ing active steps to adjusting we were considering. One Wash. U. and St. Louis,” said. “We’ll be conducting any Director of Social Justice the future.” this issue,” Hirschhorn said. was the violation under the Hattenbach said. “This year persons who had accessible Carter Hirschhorn said According to IFC, the “Even though it was one temporary suspension, and presents a new landmark in parking stickers to park in the that IFC chose to make a governing body hopes to specific fraternity, it affects [the University] had already that history and we’re excited DUC, and they’ll be met there, statement on Phi Delt’s per- combat the “toxic and different cultures.” determined that the chap- to be a part of it.” and [we] will have wheelchairs manent suspension both hyper masculine” culture In addition to the IFC’s let- ter was in violation of the According to Director of available if they need them.” because of its direct impact of fraternities through ini- ter, Washington University temporary suspension and Commencement Ida Early, the The graduates will still have on Greek life and because the tiating trainings within shared more details related for that reason was going to University’s May 2018 com- the opportunity to take photos fraternity’s actions highlight fraternities’ new member peri- to Phi Delt’s permanent be permanently suspended mencement will be negatively on the steps outside Brookings cultural issues within the ods. IFC is partnering with suspension. From late when the gun was found in affected by the construction Hall, but the process will be Greek community. the Relationship & Sexual January through Feb. 16, the house,” Vice Chancellor because of a reduction in more coordinated this year “We found that it was Violence Prevention Center the University received for Public Affairs Jill the amount of parking avail- due to tightness of space, something that we needed to bring Green Dot train- anonymous informa- Friedman said. “So for us, it able. To accommodate for according to Early. to address as a community, ings into new member tion—including videos and almost becomes unnecessary the decreased parking, the “There are still some steps because while the firearm education and have Leaders pictures—demonstrating to take disciplinary action University will ask faculty, there, and we’ll still have peo- and the hazing and what- in Interpersonal Violence that Phi Delt had violated because…the chapter was staff and any remaining stu- ple taking pictures. But we’re not are two separate issues, Education trainings in chap- the terms of its temporary already going to be perma- dents to park off campus. going to try to have volunteers they both address different ters each semester. IFC suspension. nently suspended.” “We’ve got the Muny—they out there from the construc- overlying cultural issues that also hopes to instate social Based on this evidence— Phi Delta Theta members have a couple of large parking tion company and our facilities do occur on our campus,” justice chairs within indi- and separate from the declined to comment for this lots that we’ve rented, and group to tell guests about what Hirschhorn said. “In addi- vidual chapters, as well as discovery of a semiautomatic story. we’ll have a large shuttle bus they’re seeing,” Early said. “I tion to speaking to those work with Teaching Racial weapon in the fraternity Additional reporting by running to take faculty, staff think it’ll actually be kind of incidents, we wanted to also Understanding Through house—the University made Danielle Drake-Flam and students back and forth interesting and exciting.”