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NODRAP RIJO PARDON OirR TXECCA Pie Fd Wiggle ACCENT VoL XV—No. 17 WIGGLE HIGH SCHOOL, PIE E Y E D , N. Y . , FHEEDAY, M A R C H 31,1939 Price: 5 WigqlM Big Flop Predicted In Cafe-Teria We couldn'I pii i n the Space.— so we present Dr. OOgleuiitch. We don't like him, do you? Exhibition Rhumbas And Adagios Given By P r o m i n e n t Faculty: Chamberlaine. Rolasolomyso. Maestro Bon Vodigrovski Plots Sulphur And Bromide Cookies With Hydrochloric Acid lordanaky Will Conduct Jam Session At Rivethead's Served To Suffering April Fools Who Attend Special New Subjects Sour Note Festival The Bark Talkers and the Kiddies Sorority will have their Starting this week this insli- Because of the many requests annual Rine-Around the Mulberry-Bush same the nicht after to- e will add three new courses for the spice (and there was night. The Discord Stooges Jatnble are playing their dimes for t h e its regular curriculum. The plenty of it) accosiated with boring affair. The agEreeatlon. composed of eight drums, a tuba, new course is called the the recent band trip to Boston, and a Jew's harp for the melod)'. is a mighty experienced corpse of being a good housewife, the following rather late gossip of players, havins performed in various opium dens throughout rerted by Miss Kathlumbrella has been wrilten. • the country; it is felt that they amberlaine. In her course The first couple which struck will be quite at home. ::ss Chamberlaine will demon- the reporters roving eye was tht- SLUMMING DETRACTIONS Amusement tor those not i n - irate the arts o* dishwashing, smooth and sober Don Ricardn terested in jumping around the really is an art. sweeping. Johnson shadowing the glamour Saturday, April 1stCelery- bush will be in the game room ~'ow washing. and many girl of Junior High, Miss— Retart Prance, Harmony par i n the form of a series of rapid- things connected with THE FOLLOWING 30 PARA- crander de swing in Cafe ly spoken lectures by Theophilus ing the house clean. Mi:is GRAPHS DID NOT PASS THE Teria at 30:8 (Floyd Gibbons) Dimmick. berlaine will do all the Melody jubilation et brawl CENSORSHIP — THE LAST Some of the rank renditions onstrating as she certainly a la Ricerpate avec tuneful LINE PASSED WITH AN provided by the Stooges will be the practice Cooking will trailers. The Traffic Squad under the S "Ivan Was A Russian" and be on Miss Chamberlaine's Wednesday, April 5th Honor- The future activities of the Minsky Coursehicough's "Flit On Cullemarium is what she unable direction of Miss able academy terminates for musical organizations are nu- The Bumblebee" or "War On It. Lucretia Lucinda Bortz is to be eminent Bunny. merous. To-morrow the band The Insects", both of which are Cooks Orirlnal Cake revised. and orchestra will participate in Monday. April 17th—Upright entirely new. In this division of the course Because of thi.^ obvious fact, the county Sour Note Festival institution of wisdom starts afresh after cessation. Novel Fcedbag Chamberlaine will intro- i t has been suggested that new and Contest held at Riverhead, Refreshments as announced by several original recipes, candidates be accepted in the That our notorioui' band and or- Stench the President of the Back she has kindly consented to near future. The squad has chestra will keep up their rep- Talkers will be Sulphur and us her recipe for angel- entered the following qualiAca- utations as "'S.N." champions is Bromide, mixed cookies with a may-care cake (guaranteed tions into the Traffic Squad absolutely unquestionable. The delieioUH warming drink of H y - to cut or rise). Here is Charter: (1) The candidate must orchestra alone has attained the drochloric Acid to wash them recipe: Take one large m i x - have received at least two U's record of 57 varieties on the clown. Stench also said that Mr. bowl, several aprons, cement on his or her report card (pre- tuning note, "A" Allen would have a hard time spoons, 1 cup of lard ferably in Chemistry and Phys- During thi* month of .\pril., i-ctrpiiig liie lli)or clean of con- elted), 2 pounds of sugar, 1 ics) (2) Tiie Caiididaie should all ihe school music groups will Nineteen Swell Lony Honks stantly falling junk. The Speedy ' n eggs. 1 car baking pow- have been kicked out of at least give a concert. John Sebastian Of High-Class Imbeciles Club of fast girls bought these der, 1 cup of flour, 1 pound of three classes and sent to the Smith will play a flute solo decorations with the money col- liquid cement. Mix ingredients office at least seven times. (3) standing on his head to demon- On Tuesday, March 28, the lected in the Black Check Drive. order, pour into greasy pan The pupil should have to have strate the simplicity of playing sub-zero club (Coicle to youse bake in over for 2 hours. dated at least one member of guys) grabbed dere new mem- Other entertainment will be that instrument. Kravitz wilt Irna Stierle's and Don Carlos cement is hard cover with the faculty on two occasions. hold the music for him. Other ber nuts and put 'em tru de Last but not least, the candi- toid degree. Seeber's presentation of a ~late sauce with pebbles, similar demonstrations will be Rhumba during one of the quar- date must be of the noisy type Membership to dis stupidltous not bad but have pity on given, including that of June ters. Also Senyoureata Peltem because the members of the organitinn is given dem guys Thomas, he'll use an axe Rivers, who will show how to (with spitballs) will adagio with faculty suffered from the quiet. what beg, borrow, or snitch a get hiH dinner. hit a drum on the head without Senyour Edwardo Pickett {Van This fear is truly justified be- double zero wit' a straight stick Jordvisky Directs Bugs hurting it. Dr. Daltroff will Bodegraven). The second new course is un- cause Mr. Kenneth Iveraon, our assist just in case—. in front of it. De dopes what Clark Gable Physics teache, was Sunrise Couple the direction of Professor Among the more serious num- had de century de ting I al- recently sent "away", l>ecause h i s Some of the suprise couples Clark Gable Jordansky. Profes- bers will be the blue-robed ready mentioned tbove, plus de pupils were extremely quiet in his which we have discovered in Jordansky will have com- choir's rendition of "Swing It, initiation fee are as follows: e charge of directing the j i t- experimental classes. Boobies Brock, Clark, and Die- our own individual way are as Bach" by Ludwig Von Brahms, follows; Duck Swiin and Beverly 'ugs in new steps. The better known ai the 'Three ter: Coalboin Davis; Jiggs Duf- ar is very used to work- Lucretia, pardon the familiar- fer, Ellen Nancy Gunther, ty- Lawrence, Bud McQuade and ity, hopes that all eligible stu- B's". During this piece the Jeanne Smith, Warren Kunz and with all types of bugs and audience will be requested by pists Gustavson, Harry "Baboon" and he believes his new dents will answer her ernest Helfrich. Nellie S. Keshishian, Niny Cox, Jack DulTield and Bar- call and will sign up with the Maestro Van Bodegraven to bara Levy, Percy Markland and will be a tremendous suc- hold tight' or 'get out of town'. Susie Kesh., Jean "Srew" Lew- The dancing or pugging captain of the Squad—Mr. Wil- is, Bootch MoQtfort, Lena Pi- Nellie Keshishian, Gordon Ross be done to the accompani- liam Effertz. coni. Ping Pong Roberts, Gordon and Betsy Franklin, and there t of croaking frogs and "Bird" (L'oiseau to youse French are many, many more which can- •-y grasshoppers. The Pro- guys). Ross, Mannie Scrofania, not here be printed. r says nature is the only laUbirds Shot At F o r Port John "Pocahontus' Smith, Foidi- Remember, go anywhere but who is able to provide the Blight Morcfue Collection nand Turrill, and Peper Hewett, to the funeral tomorrow night. atmospheric pressure. Slap As a notice for the sponsors knee curve, waltz trip, On the fateful Ides of March of this thing, there will be no within the bright and cheerful i "ensky special; these all just Mr. Hedy LamEhie Credited Professor Mead Swings Brawl marihuana smoking allowed ex- walls of our town penitentiary, cept in the halls, and all stags few of the new steps and very For His Able Direction O n American Folk Songs while learning. The courses some of the reform group pictures must come alone. be sold every week oy were taken for the Morgue col- On Tuesday last the final Clio lection. The warden. Warren Amid tears and roars of laugh- iieddhufo of the week at ter the Black Checker drama- Forum will be given—I mean was Engineer Puts Resmack Kids (Continued on Page 4) Kunz. more often called "Chub- given. Professor Mead of Hay- by," will include these family tics organization presented its Into Ant-Like Holes Fall production "Square Moon" stack College will speak—I mean portraits in his yearly report spoke on A m e r i c a n folk songs and on next Saturday, March 25. One day during a week in a er Week's Honor Squar* called "The Port Blight." Saul awing. The unusually small a u - Much credit is due Mr, Hedy month of the twentieth century, Scherer, up for l i f e for a t t e m p t i n g dience of five hundred students, : New List Made LamEhre for his able direction a man spoke to a group of peo- to establish a dictatorship gov- shaged, and drooled, to the syn- and guidance.

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