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Volume CXXVII, Number 10 Phillips Academy, Andover, Massachusetts May 14, 2004 AS DISHES DISAPPEAR, TEMBA MAQUBELA COMMONS CONFRONTS TO SUCCEED CARTER NEW BUDGET WOES AS DEAN OF FACULTY

By MEGAN EVANS By FAISAL KASSAM It is easy to take for granted Faced with the challenge of hir- the fact that one can grab a bowl ing the next generation of Andover of soup and a bowl of salad and teachers, Temba Maqubela has another for ice cream, yet this been named the new Dean of reality is slowly fading as 400 Faculty by Head of School Barbara bowls recently disappeared from Chase. Commons over a two-week peri- He will succeed current Dean of od. Faculty Stephen Carter, who will No dishware is exempt from continue to teach as an Instructor in the dramatic disappearance as the the Math Department and work as number of remaining spoons, Chief Financial Officer of the mugs, and plates continues to school. dwindle at an astounding rate. Appointed at what he described The vanishing china is put- a “very crucial time,” Mr. ting a dent in Common’s annual Maqubela’s most imminent duty budget, taking away from the will be the hiring of a new and tal- special treats served periodically ented faculty. in the lobby of Commons. Depicting the recent retirement Depleted dishware is always of several faculty members as the a problem come Spring Term for beginning of the loss of “what has the Common’s management anchored Andover for many years,” team. However the numbers have Mr. Maqubela will work closely been especially high this year. with both Department Chairs and a While the number of bowls number of other institutions in decreases, prices of food contin- injecting Andover’s faculty with a ue to rise, making it difficult to talented pool of individuals that will balance the budget. lead Andover teaching for the many J. Bovaird/The Phillipian China plates cost about $4 a years to come. piece, and it is clear that replac- Senior Spring slid into full swing this week, as near-tropical temperatures drew the Class of 2004 onto the Great Lawn to enjoy Referring to the fact that the the Slip ‘N Slide, and pickup games of ultimate frisbee and football. ing every piece of lost flatware eight retiring members of the facul- will not be cheap. ty honored at last week’s All-School Scott Flanagan, manager of Meeting represent a loss of 250 Common’s financial operations, years of teaching on Andover Hill, said that the problem is rather Phillips Academy Grandparents Attend Classes, Mr. Maqubela stated that people easily solved. with the right mix of experience, “We could control it if every- understanding, skills, and energy one would be aware that these Meet Faculty, and Tour New Science Center will need to be hired in order to things cost money,” he said. Ropes Salon, a reception with Saturday, although it is difficult Many grandparents, espe- makeup for the loss that the School President Allegra By LUCRETIA WITTE Mrs. Chase in the Addison to know the exact number since cially alumni, enjoy the athletic Academy is facing. Asplundh-Smith ’04 was Gallery, and sports games. The many did not register. games, both to watch their Other than the hiring of new informed of the figures about Phillips Academy grandpar- ents arrived on the Andover new Gelb Center was open for The Office of Alumni Affairs descendants do well for them- teachers, Maqubela has “no set missing Commons’ ware by West agenda” and hopes to act as a “con- Quad North Cluster Dean campus last weekend for the visitation all day, and the Oliver mailed invitations to all grand- selves and to witness the rival- annual Grandparents’ Day. Wendell Holmes Library gave parents, although Ms. Tung con- ries between schools that were duit of the faculty to the administra- Kathryn Birecki at the Deans' tion and vice-versa.” After a breakfast and regis- special presentations on the cedes that it was probably the alive when they were students. and Presidents' Meeting. In a process that began during Asplundh-Smith brought the tration at Underwood Room, the resources available to students. beautiful weather that drew the Though several teams had The weekend, which usually crowd. home games, many teams had the first week of April, members of issue to the student council, visitors joined their grandchil- the Faculty Advisory Committee where Ali Schouten ’04 and dren for classes and enjoyed the draws about 200 people, most of Pointing out the highlights of away matches, some as far away whom live nearby, had a surpris- the event, Ms. Tung said that the as Loomis or Choate. Although and the Deans’ Council thoroughly Sarah Wendell ’04 jumped on the springtime beauty of the cam- interviewed Maqubela. ingly good turnout this year. reception at Addison went very Ms. Tung spoke with the opportunity to publicize the pus. Although Mrs. Chase was problem. According to Assistant well. Athletic Office to try to arrange The weekend’s events, which responsible for making the final The girls creatively caught began with two Saturday classes, Director of the Parent Fund The grandparents enjoyed more home games, she found it decision, she received extensive students’ attention with posters included a special lunch for Alice Tung, who coordinated the meeting Mrs. Chase, who gave a difficult even for the special input from several other members program, about 300 came on speech and then greeted atten- weekend. Continued on Page A8, Column 1 grandparents and students in of the faculty. dees in the Addison. During the Although Grandparents’ Day In addition to both recruiting reception, which lasted from 1-2 is not a fundraising event, the new faculty and acting as a liaison p.m., student musicians per- Office of Alumni Affairs runs a between members of the faculty formed and food was served. Grandparents’ Fund. and the administration, Maqubela Also, Ms. Tung says that This year, their goal was to will also carry the responsibility of grandparents always enjoy going raise $30,000. As of now, they overseeing such issues as faculty to their grandchildren’s classes have raised $16,000. evaluation, housing, orientation, with them, meeting their teach- Although the Alumni office workload, and teaching fellows. ers, and seeing their friends. Continued on Page A6, Column 1 Continued on Page A6, Column 3 FIFTEEN MINUTES WITH Rowers Struggle For Balance FORMER U.S.A. POET Between Sports & Academics By DANIEL GABEL LAUREATE BILLY COLLINS While students struggled to and Residential Life Marlys deal with the stress of Advanced Edwards said that when the time By DANIEL GABEL Placement examinations during allowed to leave a dormitory was the past two weeks, members of changed from 5 a.m. to 6 a.m., Former United States Poet Andover’s Varsity and JV Girls’ she allowed for two exceptions, Laureate Billy Collins delighted Crew and Varsity Boys’ Crew crew and The Phillipian. and audience of faculty, students, also had to contend with early Ms. Dolan said, “I haven’t and guests with a poetry reading morning practices. heard a single kid or parent com- in Kemper Auditorium last week- Many rowers say they would plain about it. It’s up to the stu- end. The event, hosted by the fac- not trade those practices for any- dents and the parents. If someone ulty of the English Department, thing in the world. Others say has a problem, they should tell was sponsored by the Sandra they feel torn between their desire me.” Courtesy of Chad Green Isham Vreeland Fund. Afterwards, to train for a sport they love and Of the rowers interviewed by Jacqui Bovaird ’04, Ali Schouton ’04, Emma Sussex ’04, Jenny Wong ’04, Anne Myers ’04, and Collins agreed to an interview their need to perform well in their The Phillipian, many expressed Alanna Hughes ’04 reach the finish line during last Saturday’s Walk for Hunger. with The Phillipian. classes and on AP exams. their adamant support for morn- Did you always know that you Some rowers, feeling the ing practices. Those who felt wanted to be a poet? impact of morning crew on their they were paying an academic 94 PA Students Join Walk for Hunger Not always. I think from high academic lives, also said they are price for the rescheduled prac- school Ð or maybe a little before dents know someone who is “I thought that the walk was fearful of raising their concerns Continued on Page A7, Column 2 that. I’m not sure how it started. because coaches presented morn- By JOHN BADMAN hungry.” She added, “Also, the a good cause, a nice way to get My mother knew a lot of poetry ing practices as a privilege that money that was raised is staying off campus and walk around by heart and recited it a lot. But I Under blue skies and ample rowers needed to protect by not in the Boston area and is not Boston, said Mr. Carr. wasn’t really interested in poetry sunlight, 94 Phillips Academy complaining to teachers, skipping students and faculty raised just being sent somewhere else like He continued, “I was pleas- until I discovered contemporary poetry back in the late 50s. When classes, or using the Isham sleep- under 6000 dollars for local many other walks.” antly surprised by the amount of ing room. soup kitchens and impoverished Witnessing a large increase Andover students that turned out I was in school then, the poems that were being taught were writ- “What we say is that this is a Boston families in the annual 20 in the number of participants, at seven a.m. on a Sunday morn- privilege… If you cut a class and mile Walk for Hunger. Ms. Stubbs was exited by this ing, and those who did it ten by very traditional poets like Longfellow and William Cullen blame it on morning practice, the The route they took, which year’s turnout. She said, “In enjoyed the day and felt good deans will say no more practice,” years past, we always had a ton about what they had done. It Bryant. But I discovered through makes a loop around Boston, my father a magazine called said the Girls’ Varsity Crew starts and ends at Boston of people sign up, and then on was time well spent on a coach, Instructor in Mathematics that morning many people Sunday.” Poetry – it’s the oldest poetry Commons. Andover students magazine in the country. And my Kathryn Green. “We don’t tell decided not to show because it Understanding that there and faculty left campus early father would always bring this them to be quiet [about the prac- Sunday morning to join 40,000 was too early and they were was an unusually large outcome, magazine home. So, I started tices], just not to make a big deal other walkers being sponsored tired. But this year there were Mr. Carr was still upset that looking in there, and I discovered about them.” to raise money. only a couple students who did more PA students did not par- these very different voices that The Boys’ Varsity Crew Assistant Director of not show up Sunday morning, take in the event. sounded more contemporary. It Coach, WQS Cluster Dean and Community Service Courtney and so we had a huge turnout.” “I was a little disappointed was poetry that didn’t necessarily Instructor in Mathematics Peter Stubbs said, “What makes this Admission counselor that more boys did not partici- rhyme. That really spurred my Washburn, declined to comment. K. Ireland/The Phillipian walk different from other walks Stephen Carr was one of the 94 pate. I would guess that about interest. The early practices were The Andover Girls Crew take is that very few Andover stu- walkers on Sunday who enjoyed approved by Director of Athletics to the water. They hope to a sunny walk in Boston. Continued on Page A6, Column 5 Continued on Page A7, Column 1 Kathryn Dolan. Dean of Students dominate Interschols this year.

NEWS FEATURES SPORTS From SSATs to APs, Nate Scott ’05 recites Andover Girls Softball Wonjen Bagley coordi- lines from his favorite triumphed over nates Phillips Academy’s Shakespeare play in Stoneleigh-Burham and standardized testing pro- Features this week. Deerfield last week before gram. p. A7 p. B4. falling to Brooks. p. B1

SECTIONS: News: A1, A6-8 Commentary: A2-3 Arts: A4-5 Sports: B1-3, B6 Features: B4-5 A2 THE PHILLIPIAN COMMENTARY MAY 14, 2004

Volume CXXVII N UMBER 10 Letters to the Editor As they signed off, the editors of confident that we do not and can- Elissa B. Harwood To the Editor: 1880 wrote: “In this our last paper, not know of the existence of God; Editor-in-Chief Be careful what you wish for. we should like to say that it has he did not say that “he 'knew' no Peter V. Nelson Brittany N. Kaiser Weston B. Howe In The Phillipian’s April 16 edito- been, on the whole, pretty hard God existed,” as White quoted him News Director Head of Photography Managing Editor rial“Extra-Curricular work. To be sure, the Phillipian is in her article.) Discrimination,” the editors ask a fortnightly paper, and is not par- As someone who used to be- why they should not receive aca- ticularly learned and lengthy at lieve in God and go to church demic credit for their efforts at the that. But it must be remembered every Sunday, I did not dismiss re- News Photography Editor Business Manager that, to a number of fellows utterly Emy Gelb newspaper just as some musicians ligion out of hand as "childish" Katelyn Foley Ciarra Schmidt and actors do for their work. I can inexperienced in such matters, without considering it. Tyler Hill appreciate the sentiment, especial- journalism, even under these con- I believe that religion does ad- Sports Advertising Director ditions, is quite an undertaking.” Jon Hillman Dan Hoyos ly as the editors watch the perenni- dress fundamental questions, how- Brendan McManus al spring slide of The Phillipian ever my own answers to these Commentary Alison Murphy Circulation GPA and struggle to put out a Sincerely, questions do not involve the exis- Jane Herzeca Michael Cardella lengthy Commencement edition. Dan Schwerin '00 tence of a god. Cassie Tognoni Arts Natalie Ho But turning The Phillipian into an Evanston, IL Nevertheless, although I dis- Andy St. Louis academic activity is not the an- (Former Phillipian Editor-in-Chief) agreed with some of Dr. Miller's Sims Witherspoon swer. views and found some of his com- Features Internet & As the editors surely know, one ments offensive, I do not believe Anthony Green Associate Editors Technology of The Phillipian's chief virtues is, that the school should be blamed, Nate Scott Senior Sports, Mac King Shawn Fu and has always been, its complete To the Editor: as White suggested: “It is ap- Christian Vareika Senior Arts, Mary Rockas Parag Khandelwal editorial independence. When ad- palling that our school sponsored Cartoon Editor, Billy Doyle ministrators or faculty members In the last Phillipian, there such an ugly and hateful piece of are displeased or offended by were two articles concerning reli- rhetoric.” something they read in The gion—obviously this is a sensitive First of all, Dr. Miller was not TO SUBSCRIBE to The Phillipian, please send an e-mail with your name Phillipian, which happens quite issue. I would like to respond to a invited to Andover to speak about and address to [email protected], or leave this information on our voice- often, their only recourse is to few points in both articles, al- religion; the school may not even mail by calling (978) 749-4380. The Phillipian publishes weekly on Fridays. write a letter to the editor. They though the first does not directly have known his views on the sub- cannot hand out bad grades or in relate to religion. ject, and the actual discussion of any serious way retaliate against In his article “Cafeteria religion took up perhaps 10 min- the editors. That protection allows Catholic,” Derek de Svastich ’06 utes of the two-hour interview, the editors to exercise true freedom wrote, “Let us face it; if a law al- which was an open and voluntary of the press. lowing gay marriage were to pass, event. This puts a significant burden the foundations of this country Those who stayed after to dis- AP Schedule Insanity of responsibility on the editors, but would greatly change.” cuss the subject further chose to do that is what makes the paper such As far as I can tell, a law allow- so of their own accord and ex- Andover prides itself on its dedicated students. a remarkable educational experi- ing gays and lesbians to marry pressed their opinions informally ence. would grant the right to make just as Dr. Miller did his. He can There is no doubt that Phillips Academy students came to As the editors of the 1946 one's own life decisions to all hardly be said to have “forced” his Andover because they were and are motivated to succeed Phillipian noted, "We have more Americans as opposed to just the views on anyone. I am sure White in a very demanding environment. freedom than almost any other majority, protect a minority from is not suggesting that a faculty school-paper, but this necessarily discrimination, confirm the princi- member should have rushed up It follows that many PA students are motivated means that there is more responsi- ple of freedom of religion, and se- and physically hauled Dr. Miller bility placed on the board. That is cure the happiness of thousands of offstage the moment he said some- enough to want to earn college credit for their difficult something which the members of Americans. If Derek sees these as thing that might be found offen- courses by taking Advanced Placement exams. We are the board accept along with the changes from old ideals of the sive. given the opportunity to learn amazing things from amaz- 'glory' of producing a prize paper. United States, I am curious to see Our school strives to bring a ing teachers in an amazing place— why shouldn’t we That responsibility is something the version of the Constitution he wide range of interesting speakers make the most of it? they accept with pride, as the rest is using. to campus; this does not mean it is of the school accepts the equally Jess White's ’07 article responsible for censoring them In an effort to help us do so, the administration liberal responsibilities of mature “Intolerance Tolerated” discussed once they arrive. We got an inter- self-freedom." Jonathan Miller's remarks on reli- esting speaker to say the least. If releases students from their commitments for several The current editors' underlying gion, which she found offensive. during one-twelfth of his interview hours on days they are taking APs. This accommodation premise—that extracurricular ac- Like Jess, I was one of those who he made some insensitive com- helps but does not help enough. During AP weeks, stu- tivities are crucial to the mission of stayed after the interview and took ments, I do not think that is dents struggle to perform well in both their classes and on the academy and should be pro- part in an informal discussion of grounds for attacking Andover for the AP tests. tected in the swirl of efforts to religion with Dr. Miller. sponsoring him. slow the pace of life—is sound. Understandably, Jess said that “the Certainly some teachers are extremely helpful. They But there are ways to reduce crowd was divided between be- Sincerely, the stress of producing The lievers and non-believers…who Sonia DeYoung ’05 build AP review time into their curriculum, they give Phillipian, which would make happened to agree with his atheist generous extensions, and they offer their free time for everyone happy, without putting it views.” However, it was not actu- The Phillipian welcomes all let- make-up sessions to help students catch up who missed under increased faculty supervi- ally so clear-cut. ters to the Editor. We try to print all classes for their APs. sion and infringing on the paper's Though I am an atheist and was letters, but because of space limita- historic independence. Rather not personally offended, I was of- tions, we recommend brevity and than create a new “Phillipian fended by some of his remarks on conciseness. We reserve the right to Other faculty members require their students to class,” why not just let top-of-the- behalf of those there who believed edit all submitted letters to conform complete major assignments regardless of the AP sched- masthead editors take a lighter in God. with print restraints and proper syn- ule; indeed, the administration does not issue any guide- course load? Or, as the editors sug- Furthermore, I disagreed with tax. We will not publish any anony- lines to teachers about how they should schedule major gest, allow “Phillipian basics” to almost all of the reasons Dr. Miller mous letters. Please submit letters by assignments during AP weeks. satisfy the athletic requirement. gave for his own atheistic beliefs. the Monday of each week to The In the end, publishing The (Actually, Dr. Miller specifically Phillipian mailbox in G.W. or to The Phillipian will never be easy, but described himself as a “radical ag- Phillipian newsroom in the basement While coursework is very important, teachers could that is part of what keeps it great. nostic” in that he was absolutely of Morse Hall, or send an e-mail to be more flexible. In courses that prepare students for AP [email protected]. exams but are not considered AP courses, such as certain English and History courses, some students had major assignments due the same day as that subject’s AP. As a result, they were forced to choose between studying for the AP and studying for their tests, which they had to take during a free period since they missed class. Some Positive Images Uppers even had to turn in their History term papers the Monday after the Friday History AP. Television networks such as MTV Will Allen ’05 between the rise in popularity of televi- End of trimester exams are taken far more seriously and magazines such as Seventeen are sion in the last half-century and the on campus. Classes are shortened the day before exams frequently criticized for distorting the OPINION increasing rate of obesity. But televi- so that teachers may finish reviewing, and classes are not body image of America’s teens by glo- those with clinically diagnosed anorex- sion is not likely to go anywhere in the held at all during exam days. rifying slender body types. ia or bulimia, but rather the many girls near future; while Americans continue Critics argue that the media influ- who feel motivated, even pressured, to to spend hours a day in front of the TV, Though end of trimester exams may determine stu- ences teens to develop eating disorders closely watch what they eat by what it is logical to portray active and dents’ course grades, AP exams allow students to gain such as anorexia and bulimia out of a they see on TV. While this may have healthy lifestyles rather than unhealthy, college credit. Plus, students can demonstrate the level of need to fit into the cookie-cutter image been an issue in the proceedings sedentary lifestyles. difficulty of an AP course at Andover by scoring well on of feminine beauty presented by the decades, I argue that the new muscular It is easy to attack TV networks and media. female body image that is currently magazines for portraying fit, skinny the AP despite their average grades in the class. While these arguments are justified, glorified by the media does not encour- people with unrealistic proportions, but they ignore the complexity of the caus- age unhealthy eating habits. Though we must ask ourselves what the conse- Making students’ lives even more hectic, the school es of eating disorders as well as the there are many actresses and models quences of the alternative would be. held Saturday classes and Grandparents’ Weekend on the many people who are motivated by the who defy the trend, an overall shift in While the fitness craze may cause dis- weekend between AP weeks. Although it is difficult to media’s message to develop healthier couragement and hopelessness in some find available weekends for an event such as eating and exercise habits. “...the new muscular people and elicit unhealthy hyper- Grandparent’s Weekend, students taking APs were forced Anorexia and bulimia are complex female body image that responses in others, many people view to wake up early on Saturday and had to choose between diseases that were first diagnosed long the media’s fitness obsession in an studying for APs and spending time with their grandpar- before the thinness craze of the late is currently glorified by objective manner and are motivated to 20th century. Anorexia was first noted the media does not develop healthier eating and exercise ents. in the 16th century in the medieval habits. church, where women starved them- encourage unhealthy It is more important to concern our- The school cannot control the fast pace of AP weeks selves for their beliefs. The issue may eating habits.” selves with the health of our population nor the order of the exams. But more flexibility and have been exacerbated by the modern than the minority of people who feel understanding among faculty and administration and a media, but the disease is more than a discouraged and dejected, rather than slower pace of courses could make those two weeks more cultural artifact or response to the the last few decades is clearly identifi- motivated, by the media’s obsession manageable, less stressful, and ultimately more success- American thinness-craze. able. with a fit figure. ful for students. New research suggests that the Students who have endured even While the media’s fitness craze may cause of anorexia may be genetic, one health class in their lives know that contribute to some extreme responses while others believe that it often a the way to a contoured stomach, toned and lead to dejection in some individu- behavior pattern adopted by people arms and legs, and a healthy, muscular als, it motivates many others to take with underlying mental conditions as a appearance is exercise and healthy eat- positive steps towards developing a way of coping with depression. In ing, NOT starving oneself. healthier lifestyle. either case, a conscious effort on the Today’s youth are magazine-erudite The weekly editorials represent the opinion of The Phillipian editorial board. part of the American media to end the enough to understand that starvation thinness craze would not likely solve causes muscles to wither away and All contents of The Phillipian copyright © the problem. leads to an unhealthy overall appear- 2004, The Trustees of Phillips Academy, Inc. CORRECTIONS People genetically predisposed to ance and that over-exercising negates Reproduction of any material herein without eating disorders would most likely con- muscle growth. Every month the many the express written consent of The Trustees of tinue to suffer from them, while people pieces of prescriptive literature aimed Phillips Academy, Inc. and the editorial board As The Phillipian attempts to improve upon the content and overall design who adopt anorexic and bulimic habits at teens feature fit and attractive of The Phillipian is strictly prohibited. of the paper, the editorial board would like to emphasize its continued commit- as a way of coping with depression actresses on their cover, with blurbs on The Phillipian is printed weekly at The ment to accuracy. We hope that this Corrections box will help us accomplish would likely adopt other self-destruc- how to get a ‘beach body’ in a few short Lawrence Eagle-Tribune. this goal and aid our readers in gaining a better understanding of the events, tive behaviors in response to another weeks. Visit our website at people, and issues we cover. trend glorified by the media and pop But when you open these maga- http://www.phillipian.net culture. zines, you find sensible, healthy exer- The Eagle-Tribune Publishing Company, its officers, agents and employees have acted It is vital to distinguish between cise and eating programs—not danger- Correction: An article that appeared two weeks ago incor- solely as a printer of this publication and have ‘thinness’ and ‘fitness’ as they are por- ous crash diets. rectly reported that memorial services were held for Trustees In MTV interviews, pop stars and provided no editorial comment or manuscript trayed by the modern media. While contained herein. The Phillipian assumes full during Trustee Weekend. The only memorial service held was celebrities are frequently asked how runway models may by rail-thin, teen responsibility and liability for the content of all for Melville Chapin. soap stars, reality-show protagonists, they maintain their figures, and the copy submitted, printed and published. The and television personalities generally most common answer is a sensible, Eagle-Tribune Publishing Company, its offi- The Phillipian regrets the error. maintain healthier, curvaceous, and controlled diet like “The Zone” and a cers, agents and employees make no represen- more muscular appearances. well-designed cardio and strength tations, guarantees or warranties concerning the Perhaps the people most directly training work out. content of any copy submitted, printed, and affected by this fitness craze are not There is a logical correlation published. THE PHILLIPIAN COMMENTARY MAY 14, 2004 A3 Hypocrisy Worthy of The Price of Non-Freedom

Outrage “Iraqis are sick of foreign people recently-revealed increasingly unlikely “few bad seeds,” and then turn his atten- coming in their country and trying to American torture is Jeremy Beecher ’04 scenario—such acts tion to finding a new job, Rumsfeld chose destabilize their country.” the fault of “a few OPINION were certainly met to mourn the negation of his handcrafted DAM APOR -George W. Bush, Interview with Al bad apples.” The with tacit approval veil of secrecy. This reeks of tyranny, not A K ’04 Arabiya Network, 5/6/04 “bad apple” upsetting our occupation of from above. The reason is clear. democracy. A year and two months after ousting Iraq is the White House itself. The effect of post-9/11 terror policy Nevermind that 85% to 90% of the one of the world’s most hated tyrants, the Responsibility, if not for abuse itself, then has been to tidily militarize what should prisoners we hold in Iraq are absolved of Arab Street feels that the United States for the culture that created it, lies square- be a legal and diplomatic effort, turning all wrongdoing; if they will not confess to merely replaced him. ly with our Commander-in-Chief and America into a “home front” and marking imaginary wrongdoings at first, the logic PHILLIPIAN The world has endured images and other architects of America’s soulless all Muslims as suspects. It should sur- goes, rob them of sleep, take their OLUMNIST videos from Abu Ghraib and other Iraqi “War on Terror.” prise no one that once our troops—often clothes, and bathe them in burning light C detention centers. Some are shocking, Given, our soldiers, not Bush or poorly educated and ignorant of Islam until they do. (And these are just the some sadistic, some purely heinous, but Rumsfeld, are responsible for each indi- and its tenets—were fed the administra- measures which the U.S. military all are horrifying. We then saw George vidual act of torture, assault, rape, and tion’s false claims of Iraq’s links with approved.) Transitive logic suggests that Bush ’64 defend his Secretary of other crimes against humanity. But, the global terror, they sought passionate 85% to 90% of the tortured were also America is presently facing an Defense’s sterling performance, and idea that hundreds of isolated soldiers vengeance on the Iraqis they guard, the innocent, only guilty of being in the ideological crisis. We are finding that watched Paul Bremer ’59 hop from one across a vast country would hatch similar “terrorists” they are. wrong neighborhood or village at the empire abroad, the apparent result of disaster to the next. plans to degrade, denigrate, and ultimate- In witnessing their heroic wartime wrong time. But, once dehumanized our war in Iraq, is incompatible with The White House and Pentagon are ly dehumanize their Iraqi prisoners of President scrap 50 years of human rights beyond recovery by a Christian army, democracy at home, as the histories of fundamentally wrong in their cries that war is lunacy. If not directly ordered—an progress and veil his administration in humiliated on a global stage, an unstop- Rome, Napoleonic France, and the secrecy, in being told that this is “patriot- pable force of rage and reprisal is pre- decline of the British Empire might ic” and dissent “unpatriotic,” our soldiers dictably unleashed. Innocent men in a have suggested. are intellectually bullied to conclude that part of the world where reputation and the old American conventions of right honor mean everything will not accept Left-wingers tend to presume that and wrong they grew up with no longer their personal destruction as a simple SuperSuper SizeSize MeMe apply. That the U.S. military was quick to casualty of regime change. America’s tor- our recently-uncovered abuse of Iraqi prisoners at the Abu Ghraib prison utilize, rather than demolish, Saddam ture of Iraqis, and its subsequent airing, Hussein’s most notorious torture palace will, in the long run, only mean a stronger outside Baghdad attests to a Filmmaker calories are in each only strengthens this notion. insurgency and more deaths for a military hypocrisy worthy of outrage, a great Derek de Svastich’06 Morgan Spurlock OPINION burger, how many The real shock in this mess came in that has already absorbed far too many. gap between the notion of natural, blames obesity in grams of fat there are Secretary of Defense Donald “I Don’t Do Recent events in Iraq show that inalienable rights that we profess and America on fast food restaurants in his per order of fries, and how much cho- Quagmires” Rumsfeld’s response to the today’s America, enduring an illegal and the brutality in which we have new movie “Super Size Me: A Film of lesterol one McFlurry contains. Most problem. He was quick to complain, ultimately wrong suspension of our long- engaged during the war. We might Epic Proportions.” In the documentary people, however, choose to ignore the "People are running around with digital cherished rights, is hardly a system fit for believe, then, that our leaders are that hit theaters May 7th, Spurlock eats nutritional information when they order cameras and taking these unbelievable export. We would be better served look- sorry for this hypocrisy between word McDonald’s at every meal for an entire their meal; that is solely those people’s photographs and then passing them off, ing inside our own nation than imposing and deed. month. Not surprisingly, he gained 25 own fault. against the law, to the media.” Rather our severely flawed system on others pounds, his cholesterol shot up, his The 270-pound teen did make one than focus on the illegal and ultimately with our military might, but little else If Secretary of Defense Donald liver filled up with fat, and his blood intelligent comment when talking about counterintuitive torture employed by his behind. Rumsfeld truly accepted responsibili- pressure became disturbingly uncon- her lawsuit. She claimed that ty, as he professes to, he would have trollable. Spurlock’s vision for the McDonald’s made her fat. It undoubt- resigned. If President Bush possessed movie coincided with the slew of law- edly did. Spurlock proves that eating suits against McDonalds by customers McDonald’s makes you fat; he himself a modicum of integrity, he would who claimed the gained 25 pounds. have done more than verbally express iconic food chain “McDonald’s But is this really a Health of a Nation his displeasure. had made them mystery? According fat. With over 100 employees need not to the McDonald's In actuality, it appears that our million Americas warn its costumers Web site, a Big Mac The delightful Rosie duPont ’06 for worldwide in 2001 elected leaders are not truly ashamed. considered over- about the conse- contains 590 calo- aroma of coffee tick- were caused by non Rather, it seems that a ruling clique weight, there is quences of eating ries and 34 grams of les my nose as I OPINION communicable dis- rejects our common notion of univer- no doubt that this fat and an order of peruse the Starbucks eases related to diet, sal human rights. country has an their foods while they large fries has 540 Menu on the wall. The anticipation of the nutrition, and chronic disease. The report obesity problem. take your order...” calories and 26 sugar and caffeine tickle me as I consider linked unhealthy diets and lack of exercise Senator James Inhofe, Republican However, blam- grams of fat. the Toffee Nut Frappuccino or possibly to conditions like diabetes, obesity, car- of Oklahoma, addressed a Senate ing a company that serves calorie- Clearly, eating their food will pack on the Caramel Macchiato. Oh, the decisions. diovascular ailments, several different hearing on the prisoner-abuse scan- packed Big Mac’s and greasy French some pounds. Spurlock and those who "I'll have a Caramel Macchiato cancers, osteoporosis, and dental disease dal, saying, "I'm probably not the Fries is ridiculous. Spurlock’s sends the sue the company, however, are blaming please," I say. across the world. "What size will that be Miss? A Tall, The increase in obesity on the interna- only one up at this table that is more message that people should not be everyone but themselves. I have never accountable for their own decisions—a heard of the McDonald’s Corporation Grande, Venti…" I puzzle at the options. tional scale is due to the drastic change in outraged by the outrage than we are Once again, I have been presented with international lifestyle in the past few by the treatment.” very dangerous notion. forcing people to eat massive amounts In November of 2002, eight teenage of its products. Only one person makes the "bigger is better" advertising cam- decades. Only about 30 years ago there girls sued McDonald’s for causing their the choice to consume such foods, and paign of the was a fear of a In our reality, the lack of directed corpulence. One of them, who weighed that is the consumer. It is sad that some American food world food short- outrage is outrageous: an Investor’s 270 pound, stated: “I didn’t know how people cannot acknowledge the fact industry. And I am “But the question still age. Now, there is Business Daily/TIPP poll of 981 much fat was in those burgers and that they are accountable for their own buying into it. remains: why is nothing an abundance of adults, taken after the prison scandal fries…McDonald’s made me fat.” actions. The United being done about the accessible, high- broke, shows Bush’s reelection odds McDonald’s, like several other fast I certainly will not pay to see States is largely 65% of American citi- calorie food, in larg- continuing to rise despite the scandal food chains, has nutritional facts on “Super Size Me: A Film of Epic responsible for pop- zens who are overweight, er portion sizes and for which his administration’s poli- posters on store walls. So how can one Proportions” and put money in ularizing the fatty, less physical labor cies are indirectly responsible. argue that they “didn’t know” how fatty Spurlock’s pockets. His fundamental sugary foods associ- and the 34% of them involved with the foods they chose eat really were? message is flawed, his “guinea pig” ated with obesity who are obese?” employment. But today. But, recently, how much is the Senator Inhofe continued, "I am Such an argument is just plain idiotic. experiment is foolish, and he is unable McDonald’s employees do not need to to realize that that the consumer is there have been U.S. to blame? also outraged that we have so many reports that prove obesity is not just a The United States has developed the warn customers about the consequences never forced to eat junk food. It is humanitarian do-gooders right now national phenomenon. The World Health persona of an unintelligent, loud, lardy of eating fast food while they take their frightening to see that people across the crawling all over these prisons look- Organization (WHO) and the United dope, making itself an easy scapegoat for ing for human rights violations, while orders: the large posters on the wall to nation play the blame game and sue for Nations Food and Agriculture international obesity. But, this is not a our troops, our heroes are fighting the right of the cashier should be profit. Morgan Spurlock’s film adds Organization (FAO) noted that more than wholly fair accusation. The inflation of and dying.” As other senators argued, enough. McDonald’s takes the time to fuel to the fire and eats away our sense half of the 56.5 million deaths accounted portion sizes has been popularized in what makes America good, however, inform its customers about how many of accountability. America, but may have developed in is our professed protection of human Eastern European countries where more rights, even the rights of enemies. food is linked to hospitality. The U.S. has introduced junk and fast food to many Inhofe concluded, "These prison- nations of the world, but has had little or ers, you know they're not there for no influence on the eating habits in some Every Soldier a Hero less industrialized nations, exposed only traffic violations…If they're in cell- to British eating habits. block 1-A or 1-B, these prisoners, But the question still remains: why is they're murderers, they're terrorists, More than 500 U.S. GI’s have died in recognition which elevates her to the sta- nothing being done about the 65% of they're insurgents. Many of them the Middle East over the last year and a Dan Taylor ’06 tus of celebrity. Although her rescue was American citizens who are overweight, probably have American blood on half. Unfortunately, some soldiers do not an incredible operation, Lynch was not the and the 34% of them who are obese? their hands and here we're so con- take the journey home in an airplane seat, OPINION only one involved. By showcasing Lynch The U.S. is not trying to bridle the cerned about the treatment of those but in a casket, honorably draped with the from a hospital in Iraq after she was cap- on the television, in books, and in a made- problem. The WHO and FAO have pro- individuals." flag of the United States. tured during an ambush, in which eleven for-television movie about her, the media posed a plan to curb the amount of sugar The current war has brought with it soldiers were killed. After her videotaped is singling her out from the other soldiers, and fat in people's diets but U.S. food Concerned we should be. Senator many changes— the most groundbreaking rescue by a unit of Marines, the media even though they all deserve equal appre- industries are opposing it, claiming that Inhofe’s minimization, topic-shifting of which has been the 24 hour news cov- ciation. the statistics of how much sugar should be (while our troops, our heroes, are erage, bringing updates and statistics Although Pat Tillman and Jessica in one's diet set by the WHO is too low. fighting and dying) and blaming the every several minutes. Lynch are American heroes for their serv- This is a ploy to indulge the interests However, the media’s involvement “One soldier ice in the United States military, they are of the food industry. Since the Bush victims—“Many of them probably has caused a problem. In the wake of should not receive not the only two. Every man or woman Administration has been in office, greed have American blood on their many GI deaths, the media tends to latch who picks up an assault rifle against an seems to be the reigning factor in their hands”—cannot detract from the truth on to one particular soldier by giving him special recognition enemy in defense of the United States decision making. The government, work- that human rights apply to everyone, or her special recognition over the other which elevates her should be considered a hero. ing in conjunction with corporations, is inalienably. soldiers that are serving in the armed However, the media singles out sol- doing their best to rake in the most dough forces; the media is ignoring the thousands to the status of diers who are “special,” whether that regardless of the effect it has on the This notion of natural rights, of other soldiers presently occupying the celebrity.” means the soldier is a woman in an unfor- American people. If 500,000 Americans embedded in the tradition of natural Middle East. tunate situation or a former professional are dying each year of obesity related dis- law from which this country’s repre- Every soldier is doing his or her duty turned Lynch into a national hero. They sports player. By celebrating individual ease, and the international community is sentative democracy springs, entails to the United States, and singling out only stressed her hardships as a woman in the soldiers with unique circumstances, the seeing a drastic increase of obesity, why is that our labeling of the prisoners as one soldier among thousands to celebrate military and citied her individual bravery media is ignoring the thousands of others the government allowing the US food “murderers,” “terrorists,” and “insur- his accomplishments is a practice that is in the face of overwhelming danger; she is who are fighting and dying. The media industry to protest the WHO's plans? unfair and unjust to the men and women of should celebrate the military as a whole America may not be the only corpulent gents” does not exculpate us from now a nationally recognized celebrity. the United States Armed Forces. One soldier should not receive special for its efforts, not one individual soldier nation in the world, but it certainly should charges of brutality, regardless of the On April 22, 2004 Pat Tillman, an with an interesting background. do something about its love handles. veracity of those loosely-applied epi- Army Ranger, was killed in a firefight thets. along the Pakistani border in Afghanistan. Tillman, 27, was a former professional Despite our words, despite our football player for the Arizona Cardinals. claims to the contrary, despite our For more than a week, Tillman’s face was plan to institute a nominally Iraqi-led on the major news networks and their cor- provisional government, in Iraq we responding websites. These networks have been engaging in what looks, cited him as a hero, not merely because he sounds, and feels like an imperialist served his country, but rather that he gave adventure. up a multi-million dollar contract to do it. Every soldier gives up something important to serve in the United States While we claim that our “nation- Military. Whether that is a family, job, building” is somehow different from home or something else, each and every others’, the prisoner-abuse scandal soldier sacrifices a part of his or her life to demonstrates some of the ugliness fight for the United States. Recognizing inherent to occupation. The greatest one such soldier as being more special danger of this latest chapter of our than others by singling him out of all the Iraqi adventure, however, is that our rest is unfair to the thousands of other sol- willful engagement in the abridgment diers who are stationed abroad. By honor- of human rights abroad may cast a ing Tillman’s death to the extent that they long shadow on liberty at home. did, the media is saying that a contract with the NFL is more important than a family or friendship. The media explosion over Pat Tillman is not the first time the media has singled Adam Kapor can be reached at: out one soldier. In April of 2003, Private N. Shea [email protected] First Class Jessica Lynch was rescued A4 THE PHILLIPIAN ARTS May 14, 2004 Design Secrets in Abbot’s Attic

There is a shocking secret hidden guessed it, the stairs lead up to the old down on the old Abbot campus. observatory. It is every kid’s dream come Climb the stairs, past the Brace Center, Anna Ho true—your very own tower with a ceiling up to the third floor of Abbot Hall and you that opens up to the stars. will come to a door. This door leads to the door) and at its head is a triangular win- The idea for the apartment was con- old attic, which in the mid-1900s was con- dow looking out onto the Abbot lawn. On ceived by Jock Reynolds, director of the verted into the Addison’s Abbot Hall Artist either side is a chest of drawers, painted Addison during the 1990s, and David Apartment. Designed by David Ireland, red, blue, yellow and black. Ireland, an artist famous for his “living the apartment is now a registered work of The living room, the most open room art” whose work is now on exhibit at the art in the Addison’s permanent collection. of the apartment, is at the end of the hall, Addison. Architect Henry Moss worked Artists who come to Andover for the with a wooden column in the center to on logistics to make the space “livable.” Addison’s Artist in Residence program which the ceilings slant up from all differ- Rachel Schiller, curatorial fellow of P. Voorhees/The Phillipian live in the apartment, work in the studio ent angles in a pyramid-effect. There are the Addison, said, “David Ireland is The Boston Gay Men’s Chorus, of which Instructor of Chemistry Paul “Doc downstairs, and sometimes help teach big steel chairs, sculptures in themselves, known for making art by not making art. C” Cernota is a member, performed last weekend in the Cochran Chapel. some art classes during their tenure here. as well as the essentials—a TV and DVD He has made pieces with dirt, brooms, Enter the door and climb a winding player. chairs, toilet paper rolls… Jock staircase with slit medieval castle-like The dining room is one of my favorite approached him to design a space where Music windows in the walls; hold on to a banis- parts of the space. Across from the bed- the artists in residence could stay because ter made out of rebarÐ the kind used to room, it is rectangular with an arched ceil- he is known for projects such as this—he reinforce concrete Ð bent into whimsical ing and floor to ceiling windows—the designed his own home in California, 500 shapes. At the top of the stairs, one must only windows that were originally in the Capp Street, which is viewed as one huge Gay Chorus duck to avoiding colliding with a huge, attic. The floor is made of galvanized steel sculpture. raw-wood beam branching out like a tree as is the long table, which is made of three She went on to add, “Abbot Hall pro- limb in the middle of the room to support steel planks with edges cut at different vided the perfect space for Ireland’s work the slanted ceiling. It is as if you have angles so that the ends are zig-zagged. because of its puzzling history and all its Breaks the Mold stepped into the Home and Gardening Coming out of the center of the table are great nooks and wooden beams. He likes Channel’s “Extreme Homes.” light bulbs on poles that produce a surpris- to look at the ‘old bones of a building’ and Though they choir came together The small kitchen is the first thing to ing candle-light effect. In the cupboard are make a sculpture out of the environment. may not be the as the soft buzz they come into view after ascending the spiral dishes designed specifically for the apart- To him, part of the art is you being there, biggest of Boston’s Cornelia Wolcott had began with staircase; black countertops, mustard-cab- ment by Sol Lewitt (whose huge multicol- your reaction to the space.” choral groups, they transformed into a inets, and a galvanized steel “munching” ored wall designs were on display at the In the living room is a window looking are definitely the best dressed. loud roar. With its gloomy mood, the table with square spring-green stools. Addison earlier in the year.) not outside, but into the old gut of the Dressed in sharp tuxes and red bou- tenors’ haunting melody was strength- To the left is the bathroom, built inside All of the light fixtures in the apart- building, and you can see the insulation, tineers, the Boston Gay Men’s Chorus, ened by the deep voices of the basses. a big pipe: the outside is covered in thin ment are simply industrial light bulbs like wires and pipes. Schiller described this as BGMC, visited campus last Sunday to By the end of the piece, which lasted vertical planks of varnished wood, but the those sold at wholesale hardware stores “typical David Ireland. He’s very interest- perform a selection of songs in the several minutes, the singers showed inside has a rough concrete floor with like Home Depot. There are skylights of ed in the process of making art. The dining Cochran chapel. Although not your tra- signs of fatigue but maintained their metal walls and a drain in the middle of all shapes and sizes, while the floors are room table and floor is purposely made ditional group of singers, the choir composure up until the final chord. the space. The showerhead comes right made of pressed bamboo and covered only out of a material that scratches and stains brought with them exceptional talent, Later in the concert, the singers per- out of the wall of the pipe, with no separa- easily. It’s part of the ‘art of living’.” here and there with small, beige rattan car- and despite the small turnout at the son- formed a piece composed by the gay tion from the toilet or industrial-steel sink. From outside, one would never sus- pets. cert, the performance proved to be composer Benjamin Britten for the To the right of the kitchen is a short However, the best is yet to come: in pect such an amazing space to be hidden hall with a six-foot tall ceiling covered the hall between the dining room and bed- inside the old Abbot science building. The pleasurable for all of those who attend- prisoners in German concentration with even more wooden beams. In a trian- room is another curving staircase. A little Apartment is rarely open to the public, as ed. camps during the Holocaust. Titled gular prism-shaped nook to the right is the known fact about the building is that it it is a private residence, but will be on BGMC is one of New England’s “The Ballad of Little Musgrave and bedroom. The foot of the bed fills the used to be the science building of Abbot view for the next three Saturdays from 2- largest and most successful communi- Lady Barnard,” the song told a story, entire opening onto the hall (there is no Academy, complete with observatory. You 4 p.m. ty-based choruses and has won national with the piano setting a rhythm but not acclaim for its musicianship and com- overly dominating the piece. In this munity outreach work. piece the chorus’s projection and artic- The first piece of the concert, ulation was especially strong as its “Glorious Apollo” by Samuel Webbe, singers belted the tough words. As its was a spirited song, which was written initial chanting evolved into a gentler for a 19th century London glee club. melody, the piece created suspense and Sung a cappella, the men blended its compelling storyline swept up the together perfectly and nicely projected audience in its powerful lyrics. their strong voices throughout the Two of the songs performed fea- Chapel. This piece was followed by tured soloists. In “The Road Home” by Gloria, Op. 52 by William Mathias, a Stephen Paulus, a melodious, some- longer piece with deep undertones and what sad yet still hopeful piece, chorus an eerie feel that contrasted with the member Hank Bingham displayed happiness of the previous song. With enormous talent with his wonderful only piano for accompaniment, the range. The other piece that featured basses stood out for their powerful res- soloists was “Ella’s Song” composed onance as their rhythmic chants alter- by Bernice Johnson Reagon. A ballad nated with haunting melodies. about freedom, the song took on a soul- Several of the selected songs con- ful and spiritual mood, a change of tained lyrics, which pertain to current style from the previous pieces. issues involving the gay and lesbian To wrap up the afternoon, the community. “Requiem” by David York, singers put all their remaining energy a reaction to the AIDS outbreak in into a very spirited, happy song called America 20 years ago, began with a “Down by the Riverside” arranged by few men recounting their experiences Chad Weirick. With quick piano chords with aids, while accompanied by the and a fast beat, the song got the audi- humming of the rest of the chorus in the ence smiling and tapping their toes in a background. The stories included hurry. Bobbing their heads and stamp- accounts of personal experiences of ing their feet, the singers showed how they dealt with the deaths of immense enthusiasm and were received friends, and the toll AIDS has taken on well by the audience, who clapped Courtesy of the Addison Gallery their lives. loudly with delight at the end of the David Ireland, Interior, Abbot Hall Artist Apartment, 1993-96, gift of Ann M. Hatch (AA 1967). After these solo speeches, the entire piece. Music Music SSENIORENIOR RRECITECITALSALS CCONTINUEONTINUE GloriousGlorious GospelGospel Jina Lee Jennifer Jhun & Homan Lee A quiet young Bleak clouds and Juhn set down her bow. Indeed, it was. “Good of the evening. woman who lives in chilly weather cap- Her other piece too, Pablo de evening!” roared Early seemed to Bancroft Hall, Jina tured the atmosphere Kreisler’s “Praeludium and Allegro,” the audience mem- Alice Nam be improvising the Lee ’04 of Seoul, outside on Sunday pleased many with its striking, simple bers as Dean of song, gesturing each South Korea hides her afternoon, but inside melody. CAMD Bobby Edwards greeted them. part on a whim, and it was amazing to musical genius behind Graces Hall, the After a brief intermission, Homan “That’s the idea,” he chuckled. see them perform a piece that they had a warm smile and con- Timken Room radiat- Lee, co-concertmaster of the Academy Last Saturday, May 8, Phillips “not rehearsed” but wanted to share fident countenance. ed with the talent of Symphony Orchestra, performed. His Academy hosted a Gospelfest featur- after they had seen the receptive audi- Lee has been play- two Phillips first piece, Johannes Brahm’s Violin ing the New England Gospel ence here at Andover. ing piano since she Academy student Sonata No. 3 in D minor, Op. 108, pro- Ensemble, Just 4 Praise, the Boston Just 4 Praise, a small ensemble of was four years old and has developed into musicians. This joint vided excellent contrast to Jhun’s dark an exceptional pianist under the guidance Community Choir, and Andover’s own eight or nine performers, was led senior recital featured music. The last movement, “Presto agi- of Peter Warsaw at Phillips Academy and Gospel Choir. All proceeds from the byJerome Kyles. The highlight of their Ms. Shin-Kyung Kim in South Korea. Jennifer Jhun and tato,” splendidly capped off the piece. evening helped to raise money for the performance was a soloist whose She has played in multiple concerts with Homan Lee, both As Lee continued his half of the show, Sojourner Truth Scholarship Fund, a booming alto voice filled the Chapel. the Chamber Orchestra and last Sunday violinists, as they it was obvious this first piece, though program instituted with “hopes that She was an enormous presence on held her senior recital in the Timken commemorated their splendid, was merely his warm-up. funding will be available to support a stage and seemed ecstatic to share her Room of Graves Hall. musical careers on As Lee performed Manuel de full scholarship for a boarding student energy with the audience. There, she played select pieces by Academy Hill. Falla’s “Danse Espagnole" from "La of color.” Finally, the Boston Community Bach, Haydn, Schumann, and Bartok, Jhun dominated Vida Breve," he transported the audi- The event featured two solos by Choir closed the evening’s festival including Bach’s Italian Concerto BWV the fist half of the recital. Since coming ence into a world of gypsies and gold. Andover faculty members Edwards with gospel renditions of traditional 971 and Haydn’s Piano Sonata, Hob. to Andover, she has been a member of The slightly exotic tinge and fast-paced and Instructor of History James songs. Dressed in royal blue robes, XVI: 20. The songs were performed the Academy Chamber and Symphony tempo made some audience members Rodgers. Edwards inspired much they were an impressive sight and fea- excellently, and she engaged the audience Orchestra, an instructor in the Andover- feel like getting up and dancing. His cheering and applause, as he warbled, tured a larger instrumental accompani- through every piece as her fingers nimbly Lawrence String Program, and co-pres- chords, smooth and extremely well “Living will not be in vain!” in his ment than the other ensembles. Like executed the notes and filled the air with ident of the Academy Chamber Music executed, transcended human descrip- warm tenor timbre. After the song had the performances before, the audience melody. Society. This Sunday, she demonstrated tion. The audience exploded when Lee Lee’s playing brought each piece to come to a close, he dedicated his per- rose in appreciation of the singers and to the campus how much she has grown triumphantly finished off the short, life as she expressed the underlying feel- musically. thrilling piece. Cecilia Zhou ’04 formance to a trustee of Phillips their music. ings and emotions of the notes that ink on In her two solos, Juhn performed exclaimed, “I’m not a violinist, but I Academy who had passed away: “His Despite the pressure of three paper could never impart. Yet, whatever life was not in vain,” Mr. Edwards remarkable choirs in their midst, the the impression given by the piece, Lee Pablo de Sarasate’s for violin and saw all the emotion.” stated. The audience agreed with much Phillips Academy Gospel Choir was played each one with the same grace and piano, Op. 20 and Pable de Kreisler’s Both musicians demonstrated applause. not to be outdone. Their program caliber, dexterously drawing out note by “Praeludium and Allegro.” Though extraordinary talent on stage that Rodgers performed solos later in included “Praise Him,” a trio by Aba note and maintaining a constant focus both were good, the first was admitted- Sunday. Their instructor, Koksana the program, beginning quietly and Temeng ’06, Akosua Oforiwaa-Ayim throughout each piece. ly the audience’s favorite. The deep and Sudol, said, “they have both developed slowly building to a climax, where he ’07, and Julianne Fitzpatrick ’05, and Her mind was entirely focused on the dramatic melody which contrasted with so much technically, as well as matur- dedicated his whole being to the solo by James Mendez Hodes ’04 playing, and the audience was entirely the lively and feisty ending made the ing musically.” music. Congratulated with a standing backed by the enthusiastic spirit of the captivated by the beauteous melodies she song an interesting blend of both heavy Jhun and Lee agree that their time ovation, it was clear that he would be choir. Mendez Hodes’s dancing was was extracting from the ebony and ivory and doleful sounds. at Andover strengthened their devotion sorely missed upon his retirement, equally entertaining throughout “My keys before her. In both pieces, Jhun exhibited to the violin. The former spoke of how which will take effedt at the conclu- God is an awesome God,” a number A total of five pieces were played excellent bow control in the wide Sudol helped her to bring out her sion of this academic year. that brought an audience of profes- during the recital, and it was no surprise ranges of both tempo and dynamics. assertiveness as she played and the lat- to anyone that Lee received a standing As for the guest choirs featured in sional singers to their feet. Though her harmonics could have been ter, of how much he had learned from ovation at the end. Members of the audi- perfected, Jhun’s exceptional staccato the music faculty here. the program, the New England Gospel In short, the Gospelfest was a great ence flocked to her with flowers and Ensemble, directed and accompanied success and featured soulful perform- and pizzicato made up for this small Paralleling the sun as it began to words of praise, all of which were well- flaw. The cadenzas at the end of each shin for the audience to file out of by James Early, was without a doubt a ances from all its participants. deserved. Lee plans to continue her stud- piano line were captivating in every Graves, this concert illuminated the tal- rousing success. Their a capella rendi- Sojourner Truth herself would have ies of piano and music next year as she tion of “Did my lord deliver David?” been proud to see the legacy she left enters Emory University. aspect. One audience member whis- ent of the two performing seniors. was one of the most memorable pieces behind. - Susan Zhou pered “So good—that was so good!” as -My Khanh Ngo

THE PHILLIPIAN ARTS May 14, 2004 A5 MOVIES Theatre BY MATT Horovitz Festival: Mean Girls Germs, Rats, Sugar Plums, and Stage Directions Matt Ever seen a play by Israel Horovitz? enough pressure, where like Bobby does not listen, and is attacked by Brennan ’05 How about four in a row? It is kind of like Sarah McLean ’06 Greenwich or Upper her brief mentor Jebbie. someone turning out the lights, hitting you revealed herself to Claire Collery & Montclair, New Once more, the audience is forced to over the head with a rubber mallet, and the intimidating Jersey a bad place to see the differences and similarities of var- then waking up hours later to find every- Colon-Bibb. There Jim Hughes live. Jebbie, who ious human antagonists. Once more, in a Girls, especially high school and one around you speaking French; but in a was only one thing lives in the Bronx, is sort of “Tortoise vs. Hare” manner, the middle school aged girls, are notorious good kind of way. amiss with this opening scene: Colon- said to have really “made it.” audience is forced to see that first impres- for being venomous social snakes that Horovitz has an uncanny knack to pull Bibb and McLean were playing rats, the Toward the end of the show, a baby, sions are not always correct. prey on friends and enemies to achieve a at your mind and stretch the bounds of former an infamous creature named played by Johanna Marmolejos ‘04 to cry, Featuring the hostile trio of Ben multitude of goals, which usually your previous conceptions of the world. Jebbie, the latter a desperate 25 month-old the whole time having been concealed by Lasman ’06, Clea Major ’05, and Virginia involve rampant narcissism. That, of Last Saturday, Phillips Academy stu- rat Bobby. a blanket on stage. The baby comes to Sweeney ’06 as Richard, Ruth and Ruby, course, is prime fodder for dramatists dents put on four plays that made up the With such gestures as offering her represent the conflict of interest between respectively, “Stage Directions” (directed and comedians alike, as girl-clique Israel Horovitz Festival: “A Play for most valuable possessions, cheeses from Jebbie and Bobby. Almost immediately, by Matt Brennan ’05) was a definite movies like The Heathers shock and Germs,” “Rats,” “It’s Called the Sugar the finest estate of Greenwich, McLean’s disposition transforms, her atti- departure from the typical sort of play. frighten us by exposing us to the sheer Plum,” and “Stage Directions.” Connecticut, without abandon to Jebbie, tude turning more violent. She begins to There truly was no dialogue between hatred behind some girls’ actions while An eerie red light shone as the hypo- characters, only recited stage directions, the new release Mean Girls provides us thetical curtain rose on the night’s first such as “Richard adjusts his underwear, with a sharply satirical but more light- mini-play, “A Play For Germs,” directed discreetly,” said by Richard himself, while hearted look at “Queen Bees and by Lisa Donchak. The very odd concept performing the action. While they may Wannabes” (the title of the book by of the show was one which I did not not have spoken with each other, the Rosalind Wiseman on which the film is understand until well after the acting had actors still pulled off a compelling display based). begun. As it stood, there were two major of love, death, and sibling rivalry . Written by SNL writer Tina Fey, who characters: James Mendez-Hodes ’04 as The emotion shown by each actor was plays a math teacher in the movie, the Gonorrhea and Andrew Ostroff ’06 as simply amazing. Major, other than a few film focuses on Cady Herron (Lindsey Syphilis. The audience soon discovered slipped lines, crisply conveyed her deep Lohan), a girl who, after living her life in that the square-shaped stage they sur- feelings verbally while simultaneously Africa with her zoologist parents, is rounded was in fact a woman’s uterus. showing the emotion which allowed her forced to enter the jungle of an American “I got Casanova, beat that. I got to access them. Lasman’s shy outward public high school. Melodrama (of the Napoleon, beat that,” huffed Mendez- demeanor was offset beautifully when he Hodes, looking especially pleased with revealed his aggressive inward thoughts. entertaining sort) and hilarity ensue himself as they argued over past victories Sweeney appeared to bring some happi- when Cady joins the group of mean pop- to determine who should get to stay inside ness to the others after her entrance, but ular girls known as “The Plastics”, this particular woman. “Hitler and she eventually was drawn into the same develops a crush on the ex-boyfriend of Mussolini,” retaliated Ostroff, with a bril- antagonistic mental jousting as the others. the “The Plastics’” leader (Jonathan liant air of finality. And that Syphilis had She continued her downward emotional Bennett) and declares war on that leader, once infected the two most vicious dicta- spiral throughout the play, ending with a Regina George (Rachel McAdams). tors of all time won him his ticket to stay brilliant display of violent self-loathing. Director Mark Waters and Fey, who and share the woman with Gonorrhea. It is tough to make a play with no dia- worked together closely on the project, After only a few minutes, Syphilis logue this good, but Brennan and his have crafted a supremely entertaining began to verbally attack Gonorrhea, criti- actors really made it worth going to see. and witty film, with the subtly incisive cizing the lethargic manner in which he After a quick set change, namely tons script and restrained direction capitaliz- was infecting the girl. The audience soon of newspaper being scattered across the ing perfectly on the absurdity of these discovers, however, that this girl is only floor, “It’s Called the Sugar Plum,” direct- girls’ lives. For most of the film, the fifteen and that Gonorrhea has developed ed by Katie Nadworny ’05 took the stage. script intertwines shaky but nonetheless a special affinity for her. The prestige of Alex Limpaecher ’04 played the complex effective plot with scenes of utter come- Gonorrhea is ruined for Syphilis when he role of Wallace Zuckerman, a college stu- dy, showing the audience all of the dirty discovers this soft side of the notorious dent charged with accidental vehicular tricks these teenage saboteurs use to stab killer, and so Syphilis begins to attack the manslaughter. Though the murder was an their “friends” squarely in the back. The girl himself. accident, the victim’s fiancée, Joanna story is not so much condemning of the Painful shrieks, courtesy of Jordana Dibble (played by Lexie Kuhn ’04), girls as society, however, because each Wolfe ’04, seeped from backstage as blamed the death of her lover on character speaks lines with enough Ostroff convincingly scratched the walls Zuckerman. Any previous relationship charm and humor that the audience of the theatre classroom. The whole audi- between the two is unclear, but they do laughs almost out of pity for the situation ence went tense as Syphilis’s rampage seem to know each other in some way. in which the group of friends has found endured. Gonorrhea began to yell also, A vicious cycle of love and hate themselves. warning Syphilis of the Penicillin that is ensues after the initial meeting, with Kuhn Fey deftly avoids stooping to levels coupled with such extreme pain inflicted still seeking vengeance for the death of of dumb comedy or gross-out humor, as upon humans. However, despite Mendez- her lover one minute, then turning many teen movies do, and instead hones Hodes’s attempts to stop Ostroff from Limpaecher into her new lover the next. in on the reasons these girls want and hurting the girl, his rage persisted. In the downswings, both actors take part even need to torture each other. Stock In the end, however, they both ended in a violent dismantling of the set, con- characters (and we’re talking VERY up biting the bullet at the hands of tributing even more to the chaotic state of stock, because all of the characters in this Penicillin, as prophecied by Gonorrhea. In the room. However, these downswings the most bizarre setting imaginable, “A are countered with intimate love scenes film are caricatures) do weaken the film Courtesy of Katie Nadworny a bit without adding much comedy, but Play for Germs” embodied the answer to Lexie Kuhn ’04 and Alex Limpaecher ’04 perform in “It’s Called the Sugar Plum,” shared between the two. The actors’ abili- an age-old question: “How much is too ty to change between these two deeply are small enough roles that they never one of four plays to go up last weekend as part of the Israel Horovitz Festival. much?” with Mendez-Hodes and Ostroff contrasting emotions so quickly was one distract from the otherwise-enjoyable supplying the perfect juxtaposition of the audience is drawn to believe that embody a logical motivation, claiming of the more impressive aspects of the play. central action. The end of the film slips options. “A Play for Germs” was, by far Bobby is either very nice or very afraid. that her own parents were killed by Limpaecher was remarkable in his (sadly) into a “be who you want to be” and long, the most bizarre play I have seen Jebbie herself, however, is not so easy to humans and attempts to bite the child. ability to steal the show using his various tone of mushy sentimentality and a final here at Phillips, but a treat nonetheless. convince, and it is only after a bit of cry- When faced with the problem of the bits of comedy within the otherwise dra- scene of the cliques mixing with one “Rats” was the second of four plays ing over her dead parents on the part of child, Jebbie acts in the exact opposite matic play. Kuhn really seemed to get into another leaves a sour taste in the mouths performed in the Horovitz festival this Bobby that Jebbie comes around and manner, and grows extremely protective her part, playing the role of the recent of filmgoers who desire a realistic satire past Saturday. Though not quite as bizarre offers her help and shelter. and maernal. The audience suddenly real- widow to near perfection, in despair yet rather than a moral parable. With Fey’s as its antecedent, “Rats,” directed by A few funny moments speckled the izes that maybe Bobby is not exactly trust- already looking for new love. When her wit as sharp as we might expect in the Hannah Seldin ’07, also provided a defi- performance, though the best ones were worthy, and that perhaps Jebbie is cold to despair turns to anger, the result is incred- rest of the script, one is disappointed by nitely original concept. often the subtle, well-placed comments desperate arrivals merely to stay alive. ible and transitions the whole mood of the the weak finale she wrote. From the darkness of the pitch-black about the differences between the human Just like Gonorrhea in “A Play for play with her tone of voice and physical Waters overemphasizes the jungle- stage came voices: “Where are you?” and rat perspectives. For instance, chatter Germs,” Jebbie represents the wise, actions. This second half to the Horovitz like quality of the school with a few too “Who’s there?” shouted Tanisha between Colon-Bibb and McLean reveals methodical element of a human annoy- Festival was definitely some quality enter- many heavy-handed brawls, but, for the Colon-Bibb ’06. “Come on out, god- that, to a rat, the clean streets and lack of ance. She knows that a rat’s bite causes tainment, and at two for the price of one it most part, stays back and lets the charis- damnit, I know you’re there!” After garbage and greaseballs makes some- Baby to cry, and alert the parents. But was well worth it. ma of the actors and script shine through. The art direction, costumes, and makeup are what one might expect, are realistic and, most importantly, do not ignore the Music truth of teenage sexuality. Fey and Waters realize that long-term, innocent love is not at stake here, but a hook-up in the projection room above the auditori- um or in some random persons’ bedroom Cochran Hosts Senior Concertos at a house party. This honesty is well- appreciated by an audience rather tired of seeing every teen movie focus on a poor- In preparation for their departures Pak showed us the crowd favorite, this nitely one of the evening’s highlights, ly written, downright crappy, unrealistic from Andover in 22 days, six of complexities of piece stood out not though the most amazing part of his love-at-first-sight-let’s-get-married-and- Phillips Academy’s most talented sen- which he is capa- Luke Cahill only for its sound, performance was the fact he played live-as-one-forever storyline. iors performed their Senior Concertos ble. but also for its completely from memory. His mastery Lohan and McAdams, at the center of the story, are charming, attractive, last weekend. This concert raised the The next performer was Jami guest conductor who is also Myers’s of the violin was evident as he played entertaining, and have great comedic bar for all musicians at Andover and Makan ’04, who started off a series of violin instructor. Myers played with one of the most intricate pieces of the instincts. Each overplays her character was the final flourish of each of the the evening’s violin concertos. Makan composure replete of feeling and night. enough to elicit a laugh of absurdity but musicians’ musical careers at Andover. is a multitalented individual, who smiled throughout her performance. Elizabeth Robie ’04 closed the never goes so far that they compromise Conducted by drums for Steal The next violinist, Jessica Hsiao show with Felix Mendelssohn’s Violin the realism of the film. Their on-screen William Thomas Your Face as ‘04, brought with Concerto in E chemistry (or, if you like, lack thereof) and accompanied well as playing her the woodwind minor, Op. 64. makes for great tension that perfectly by the Academy the violin. and brass to dou- Her twelve years depicts the catty, animalistic hatred of Chamber Dressed to ble the power of of violin train- these mean girls, and each seems to rel- Orchestra, the impress, Makan the orchestra. The ing were made ish the meanness, to the audience’s group amazed its took the stage to piece Hsiao per- apparent as she greedy delight. The supporting cast is audience and lit a booming formed had a very made the elabo- serviceable but not specifically mention- up the chapel applause and left large range of rate concerto able, although Fey is particularly acute with a brilliant to an even bigger dynamics and was look simple. The with her comedy, probably from her performance. one. The piece very beautiful. solo was very experience on SNL. Jessie Pak ’04 he performed, The song in itself long and Though light comedic fare, Mean (clarinet) was the Mozart’s Violin was an experi- changed moods Girls does provide absurdist commen- first PA student to Concerto in A ence, and the often, which is tary on the nature of the beast we know perform Friday Major, K219, immense skill of one reason why as high school, and the girls who main- night, and opened was highlighted Hsiao only made Robie liked it: tain the equilibrium of that beast through the night with his by some incredi- it better. “It has so many their complex social actions. The pon- spectacular per- ble scales toward Alex different sounds derous, subconscious decisions they each formance of the end of the Limpaecher ’04 to it … one part character makes may or may not ruin the Concerto in B flat solo and left (violin) then per- is soft and life of another girl; this makes the audi- for Clarinet and N. Bowen/The Phillipian quite an impres- formed N. Bowen/The Phillipian another loud and ence wonder about modern society and Orchestra by Jami Makan ’04 plays Mozart’s Violin sion on the audi- Symphonie Jessie Pak ’04 soulfully performs tense … it the pressures it puts on high-schoolers, Johann Stamitz. Concerto in A Major, K219 at ence. Espagnole for Johann Stamitz’s Concerto in B flat allows me to particularly girls, to look and behave a Pak said, “It felt Friday’s concert. Soon, the Violin and for Clarinet and Orchestra. really express certain way to fit in. It sounds like a tired good to release Chapel got a Orchestra, Op. 21 composed by myself.” concept, but with Fey at the helm and all of the built up emotion from practic- momentary break from classical music Édouard Lalo; a very moving, power- Amazing performances by these young talent riding along, the film suc- ing.” Pak’s enthusiasm was visible and took a turn toward the barnyard. ful, and advanced piece. Few people at members of the Class of 2004 provided ceeds in eliciting two things we don’t even before he played as he danced and “Millionaire’s Hoedown” played by this school could handle the complica- for a night of wonderful music. The often see together at the cinema these bounced to the sounds of his accompa- Anne Myers ‘04 on the violin, conduct- tions contained in this piece, but music department is sad to let go of days: a laugh and a thought. nying orchestra. His performance was ed and arranged by Holly Barnes and Limpaecher mastered it beautifully as these students, but is excited to see spectacular and despite the incredible composed by Herman Clabanoff, trans- he played with enough force to knock where they go in the future with their Overall Grade: 5 difficulty of soloing with a woodwind, ported the crowd to the boonies. A over a building. Limpaecher was defi- careers. A6 THE PHILLIPIAN NEWS MAY 14, 2004 GRANDPARENTS VISIT Walk For Hunger Raises CAMPUS TO ATTEND Finances and Awareness Continued from Page A1, Column 3 $100 can provides 200 people 80% of the walkers from with a sandwich and soup at a CLASSES, ATHLETICS Andover were girls and I would soup kitchen. This year the hope in the future that more 40,000 walker raised over three Continued from Page A1, Column 4 boys would view the walk as million dollars, or about 192 did benefit from several dona- something fun and productive to thousand families with food for tions, Ms. Tung says that the do on a Sunday afternoon,” he a week. idea of the weekend was not to said. raise money from the grandpar- Nicholas Shea, ’05 walked ents but to let them visit and for hunger to feel the satisfac- learn about the school. tion of helping others. 2003-2004 The grandparents of Margaret “It was tough getting up at Kelly ’06, who came all the way six on a Sunday morning, but it National from Virginia to attend, enjoyed was a really good cause, and at visiting campus for the first time. the end of the day everyone who Mrs. Kelly said, “I had a walked felt a big sense of Merit great time going to all of accomplishment and that they Margaret’s classes. did something they can be proud Returning to a campus really of,” he said. Scholarship brings back memories, and it is Nicholas added, “I’d say the wonderful for me to see my best part of the walk was the granddaughter doing so well and atmosphere of excitement and Winners to see for myself that she is in a common purpose. It was fun to such a good school.” just walk and hang out with my After lunch, Mr. and Mrs. friends and meet other people Kelly drove all the way down to who were walking as well.” Tess Borden Loomis to watch Margaret play Katherine Hunckler ’05 on the Varsity Tennis Team. C. Touhey/The Phillipian enjoyed reaching out to the Many other grandparents Tony Quainton ’51 speaks with a student after Wednesday’s All-School Meeting. A career diplo- Boston community while having made the trek to away games. mat, Quainton served as head of the U.S. government’s anti-terrorism program from 1978-81. fun. “It was nice that there was The grandparents of Parla Alpan such a large turnout and a lot of Margaret ’06, who plays on the Girls’ enthusiastic Andover students Water Polo team, and the family Tony Quainton ’51 Speaks on Terror, who finished the walk,” she of Liz Slaughter, ’06, met in the said. Dallet stands of a game at Deerfield. She continued, “I walked for Between cheering loudly for Urges Multilateral Approach to War a good cause with my friends, the Big Blue, they discussed stopped for ice cream on the Andover and the classes they had conflict a war, he said, as it is able issues that have led to acts way, and just had fun while Eric attended. By MARYSIA BLACKWOOD not a war in the traditional of terrorism. being off campus On Sunday, grandparents Tony Quainton ’51, former sense. There can be no clear Mr. Quainton said that the Many Andover students will Mitzenmacher were invited to the Catholic and head of the counter-terrorism victors and losers in this war, he costs of fighting terrorism will witness the results of their walk Protestant services held at the program in the United States said. be high. He cited his own expe- to earn money on a personal Chapel and brunch at Commons. government, spoke on terrorism "It is hard for me to see a rience as U.S. ambassador to level, as they volunteer at many Many of those who stayed and offered interesting anec- time when we can say with con- Peru, where he traveled with 14 of the organizations receiving overnight chose to attend with dotes of his experiences abroad fidence that terrorism is behind bodyguards and endured having the money from the walk. Laura their grandchildren. during this Wednesday’s All- us," he added. his house blown up. “Andover students volunteer After the event, Ms. Tung School Meeting. There is "no doubt that we "We can protect some things at the Bread and Roses soup Schoenherr said, “I think it went very well. "It wasn't like this in my will see more of the same," Mr. most of the time," he said. But kitchens about once every two Grandparents are very apprecia- day," Mr. Quainton said Quainton stated, adding that, not all the time,” he said. months, and work for the Boston tive and enjoy being with their (despite Assistant Head of though he cannot with absolute These costs, he said, are not Food Bank also. Most of the grandchildren. School Becky Sykes' assurances certainty say anything on the limited to financial figures. money earned at the walk will Peter Whalen Grandparents’ Day is a very to the contrary,) as he addressed use of weapons of mass destruc- "We've lost some of our go to these organizations,” Ms. exciting event because they get Phillips Academy's student tion in the near future, he is freedom, "he said, such as free- Stubbs said. to see all that their children are body, complete with toga-toting "absolutely certain we will see dom of mobility and access to According to the organiza- accomplishing at PA, and learn Seniors. (The Seniors sported more bombs going off around symbolic places such as the tion’s website, www.project- what the Andover education is all togas for a spirit day.) the world." Statue of Liberty,” he said. bread.org, groups from church- Jenny Wong about.” Mr. Quainto is an authority "There have been real costs “Americans have also come es, other schools, and corpora- on terrorism. He served as head to fighting the war on terror- to accept some intrusion into tions were among those who of the United States govern- ism," said Mr. Quainton, costs their privacy,” he added. walked. The proceeds of the BE A ment's counter-terrorism pro- paid by the United States as a After graduating from walk will fund around 400 emer- gram from 1978 to 1981. society. Andover, Mr. Quainton attended gency food pantries, soup PREPPY "Whatever we do," said Mr. Princeton and Oxford Winners receive CONTEST "It's a different world, a dif- kitchens, food banks, and food ferent war, and a different set of Quainton, "we can't do it Universities. salvage programs throughout $2,500 CHAMPION AND... legends and histories," Mr. alone," stressing the urgency of He went on to join the Massachusetts. Annually, these Quianton said of the difference understanding the underlying Foreign Service, and has served 400 groups serve around 36 mil- from the between his school days and the causes of terrorism and the as U.S. ambassador to Peru, lion meals. National Merit present. importance of factors such as Nicaragua, Kuwait, and the Students were required to WRITE FOR For his generation, Mr. poverty. Central African Republic. donate a minimum of $20 dol- Scholarship Quainton said, "the war" had "Some things can be Mr. Quainton is currently lars for the walk. Most also Corporation. NEWS! been the Soviet-American con- solved," he said, citing the diplomat in residence at solicited donations from others. flict that comprised the Cold Arab-Israeli conflict, the prob- American University in Raising $500 can provide 32 Harvard Flip War. Now, "the war" signifies lem in Ireland, and conflict over Washington, D.C. families food for a week, and Flops x6491 what President Bush has termed Kashmir as three feasibly solv- "the war on terror." Louis Vuitton x6767 The phrase "war against ter- Yves Saint Laurent rorism" is, according to Mr. Temba Maqubela to Succeed Stephen Carter Quainton, somewhat of a mis- Wallet x6054 nomer. It is not helpful to call this As Dean of Faculty; Plans Role as Faculty Voice Continued from Page A1, Column 6 a Masters of Science in Chemistry from the University of Kentucky, “My main responsibility, how- Mr. Maqubela is known among ever, is to be the voice for the fac- students for the teaching Andover’s ulty,” Mr. Maqubela stated. tougher Chemistry classes. A member of the Phillips His courses include Chemistry Academy community since 1987, 580, an Honors level Advanced Mr. Maqubela is no stranger to the Placement Chemistry class and role of an administrator. Chemistry 610, the equivalent of a Currently the Director of second year university level class (MS)2, a competitive summer pro- in Organic Chemistry. gram for minority students with Despite the high demands as demonstrated talent in mathematics the new Dean of Faculty, Mr. and science, Mr. Maqubela also Maqubela will still continue to served as Chair of the Chemistry teach one course per term. Along Department from 1994 to 1999. with Instructor in Chemistry David Elected to the Faculty Advisory Stern, he is currently designing a Committee in both 1990 and 1996 new course entitled Introduction to as well as to the Faculty Spectroscopy and Compensation System Committee Chromatography. in 1999, Mr. Maqubela currently Outside of the classroom, Mr. sits as an elected member on the Maqubela has coached both Strategic Planning Committee. Cluster Basketball and Cluster Mr. Maqubela said that he is Soccer and has also served as a “humbled and honored” that he has house counselor. been chosen to lead Andover’s Excited with the challenge of P. Nelson/The Phillipian “exemplary” faculty. his new post, Mr. Maqubela stated The holder of a Bachelors of Instructor in Chemistry Temba Maqubela talks with Instructor that he “hope[s] to continue the Science in Chemistry from the in Physics Caroline Odden outside the Gelb Science Center. Mr. great work of [his] predecessors.” Maqubela will serve as the new Dean of Faculty. University of Ibadan in Nigeria and THE PHILLIPIAN NEWS MAY 14, 2004 A7 Commons Budget Suffers After Bowl Loss Wonjen Bagley Urges Calm entirely on the students, faculty that the janitorial staff set aside This extensive dishware Continued from page A1, Column 1 and staff are involved as well.” all china they found in the trash. search proved what the men sus- For Nervous AP Students that made clear the reality and He continued, “Thankfully I After a day, the men had col- pected. Many would rather magnitude of the problem with have been seeing faculty mem- lected nearly a van full of china; throw out the bowls than simply By DANIEL GABEL blunt numbers and pleas to stu- bers returning china. I am sure dishes which Commons had take them with them upon their dents’ morals as taught by their the students will follow suit.” already been forced to replace to return to Commons. Standing above the notoriously appealed to me,” Ms. Bagley mothers. In past years, Mr. Flanagan keep up with the supply and All dishware can be returned small desks and staring out at hun- remarked. Schouten said, “Sarah and I and an associate have requested demand. to Commons at any meal. dreds of nervous students, Wonjen Since Ms. Bagley lives in the chose to use blunt posters Bagley begins to read the instruc- Andover area and has her children because we felt that it was the tions for yet enrolled in nearby schools, the best way to reach people.” another AP opening seemed all that much She continued, “Everyone AP Week Poses Challenge to Crew exam. more appealing. So, after a brief thinks, oh, it doesn't matter if I Continued from Page A1, Column 6 used the Isham sleeping room. A limit what students can do.” For the period of training under her prede- take one bowl this one time. But third student sought personal “The practices aren’t really tices asked to have either their Phillips cessor, she finally joined the everyone is doing it.”a time for class after an early row- voluntary day to day, but it was names or stories withheld Academy stu- Phillips Academy community as “When it becomes so that ing session. voluntary to sign up for crew,” he dents crammed the Director of Standardized because they did not want their students dining in Commons Garrett Kirk ’04, who cap- said. “With crew, they know they into the narrow desks, it is a trau- Testing. dedication to crew, or their boat can't use china bowls, it becomes tains the Varsity boys’ team, said will face this situation if they’re matic experience, but for Since then, she has come to positions, to be called into ques- inconsiderate.” he heard a coach tell students not going to be doing the APs.” Andover’s AP Administrator and appreciate a job that many might tion. “However, it was the fact that to “make the practices an issue.” JV Girls’ Crew coach, Director of Standardized Testing, it just see as boring. Ms. Bagley said School policy states that stu- many students were throwing “I feel that it is the right Instructor in French Robert is only the beginning of another that, while students may have their dents who take APs in the morn- away Commons' bowls, leaving thing,” Kirk said. “If someone Moss, said that on some days dur- day at work. own opinions, one of her favorite ing are excused from classes all them in classrooms, and forcing has a problem [with the prac- ing AP week, practices have to be Ms. Bagley holds what some tests is the SSAT, an exam taken day. Those taking the tests in the others to clean up after them that tices], then they should talk to the held in the mornings to avoid consider the most tedious job on mostly by middle school students afternoon are exempt from some really pushed us to publicize in coaches before they complain to changing boat lineups. campus Ð she administers the applying for high school. classes and afternoon commit- this fashion, she added.” their teachers.” “To preserve boat cohesion, dreaded tests that Phillips “The SSATs are always nice ments, usually athletics. This message seems to have Many rowers say they do not we need to keep from altering the Academy students find themselves because the kids are younger, and However, rowers do not get a been somewhat effective as mind morning practices. Chris lineup,” explained Mr. Moss. taking around this time of year. often, they want me to help them. break from sports. The first three some of the missing dishware is Zegel ’05 said that when his boat, “We wouldn’t be able to race well The PSAT, the ISEE, the AP, the Students will ask me what different girls’ boats and first two boys’ making its way back to B2, was given the choice of hold- on Saturdays without lineup con- SSAT, and the SAT Ð she coordi- words mean, and though, of boats practice either at 5:00 a.m Commons. ing practice either post afternoon sistency throughout the week… nates them all. But according to course, I can’t tell them, the inno- or in the late afternoon on days Bagley, even testing has a lighter cence is nice to see.” The publicity campaign also AP or in the early morning, his If at all possible, we hold the sparked discussion on a topic when any of the eight rowers in side. Her least favorite? The APs. boat chose the morning practices. practices in the late afternoon, most would never have consid- the boat have afternoon AP “With my job, there are a lot of “APs are the hardest to give Dean Edwards said, “I don’t but sometimes morning practices ered. exams. i’s to dot and t’s to cross… but just because there are so many of disapprove about them going out are the only way to make it Schouten said, “I know it got The crew program, in the there’s nothing like the look on stu- them in such a short period of time. and doing their morning practices work.” people talking about the issue, so midst of a successful season, dent’s faces Ð a look of completion But then, some of the foreign lan- as they have done for a long While Moss says that the I assume that this deterred some does not want to sacrifice two and relief – when they finish. It’s guage, art, and music APs are real- time…G1 is undefeated this year practice schedule can be difficult people from taking bowls from weeks of training, and it is diffi- always nice to see that, in some ly amazing because you can see the and they want to go through their for some students, he pointed out Commons, which was the goal.” cult to conduct effective practices small way, I’m helping these stu- talent these kids have Ð they sing, race this weekend and through that students who are not taking The Council also discussed with boat members missing to dents,” explained Ms. Bagley. speak the language, and reply. Interschols undefeated. I think APs have the afternoons free to the idea proposed by Julia take exams, members of the pro- Testing may be a serious mat- Some of the kids are just so talent- they are all pretty passionate sleep or catch up on studying. Littlefield ’06 of placing collec- gram said. However, juggling ter, but after holding her position at ed. It’s great to see them so strong about getting out on the river in And he said, in most cases, the tion boxes in dorms or central early or late practices, classes, Andover for only a year and a half, in a subject,” Ms. Bagley com- the morning.” students want to come to the locations on campus where stu- and APs is taking its toll on some Ms. Bagley is already learning to mented. Dean of Studies Vincent practices. dents would be encouraged to rowers. laugh at some of the more humor- Meanwhile, as Ms. Bagley Avery said, “It’s a difficult situa- “Students really don’t ask for return any bowls or plates they Several told The Phillipian ous situations that have arisen dur- continues to look at the lighter side tion students face but the problem time off because they are com- have lurking in their rooms. they are struggling. For example, ing her time giving exams. of her job, she did have some seri- is not unique to crew. Music, mitted to crew. Ninety-nine per- Despite the Council’s efforts one student said he was so “I remember one of the things ous advice for students that will plays and other extracurricular cent of the time, rowers just say to encourage students to bring exhausted from his morning prac- that we used to ask was for stu- soon be sitting in the narrow desks, activities present the same diffi- ‘I’m not going to let the boat dents to bring their cell phones for- nervously waiting for her to their dishes back to Commons, tice that he had difficulty staying culties. That’s just the nature of down.’” ward. I did that once, and sudden- administer an exam. Mr. Flannigan noted, “This awake during an AP. Another shortage cannot be blamed the academy, because we don’t ly, about 300 students started walk- “Come on time. Have a picture ing towards me. It’s kind of funny ID and a #2 pencil. We do have the that the testing industry hasn’t luxury that some people know caught up to the fact that every- each other, but it’s still important to Former Poet Laureate Collins Speaks on Campus body has a cell phone now,” she bring a picture ID. Dress appropri- explained. ately Ð layers to take on and off are Continued on Page A1, Column 4 books than you would expect for States Poet Laureate? What don’t have to have any dealings a poet to sell. My audiences tend exactly did that position entail? with the White House either. So Ms. Bagley was not always a always a good idea so that you can When did you decide to pur- to be much bigger than you’d Well, I felt great about it. It’s the responsibilities are quite test administrator. Prior to her be as comfortable as possible dur- sue writing as a career? expect for a poet. It’s all gravy to difficult to call yourself a poet; minor, but the opportunities are arrival at Phillips Academy, she ing the test.” To decide to be a poet as a me. I think that I observe, as best it’s something that other people quite vast. Some of my predeces- worked for 13 years in Social career is extremely foolish. I as I can tell Ð and its hard to ana- have to call you before you call sors and I took advantage of this Work, serving first as a substance stayed in school. I went to gradu- lyze your own virtues without yourself a poet, because it seems position to start national and abuse counselor but eventually ris- ate school. I got a Ph.D. Then, I embarrassment Ð but I try to like you’re honoring yourself by international poetry initiatives, ing to be the Director of the Boston started teaching college, so I’ve observe a kind of etiquette in my describing yourself as a poet. But such as Poetry 180: A Poem a Regional Office of Substance been a professor most of my life. writing toward the reader. The I think once your appointed Poet Day for American High Schools. Abuse Services for the Department The poetry evolved much later. I etiquette involves writing in full Laureate, it removes all doubt What advice would you give of Health. She also taught social really started as a professor who sentences, trying to make every that you actually are a poet. So it to aspiring writers and poets? work at nearby Gordon College. happened to write poetry. At this line clear, and trying to make was good to know that I was real- Read. I think the great inspi- The mother of two children, point of my life, I suppose I’ve every line contribute some way to ly a poet after all those doubts. ration for poetry is jealousy. You she ultimately decided that she become a poet who happens to be the poem. I try to begin poems on The job description was very have to find a poet or a novelist or wanted to spend more time at a professor. So one kind of took a common note so that the reader simple, there’s just a short check a dramatist that really infuriates home. Retiring from her career in over the other. can follow. I try to begin poems list of responsibilities, which you because they are so good and Social Work, she took up the duties You have been tremendously with something very clear, but the include giving a reading and a makes you think that maybe you of stay-at-home mom. But when successful in drawing large num- idea is that it will lead into some- lecture at the Library of congress could be a little like that person. an opportunity at Andover arose, bers of people to poetry. What do thing mysterious toward the end once a year. You run a poetry At that point, you begin the first she elected to return to the work you think about your work is dif- of the poem. I think maybe read- reading series at the Library of step toward being a real writer Ð force. ferent and allows you to appeal to “When I heard that there was a ers enjoy that kind of imaginative Congress, and you are given imitation. You begin by imitating so many people that don’t other- position available at PA, I was travel Ð where you begin in a some money at the beginning of these writers that you admire and wise enjoy poetry? eager to return to work. Phillips S. Hall/The Phillipian known place and then you move the year to give out to younger envy. If you stick with it, imita- You know, I really don’t Academy’s reputation was very on to a place that’s a little cloudy. poets. That’s about it. You don’t tion will eventually lead to some- Wonjen Bagley oversees know. It’s curious. It’s true that strong, and the idea of working in a How did you feel about being have to write ceremonial poems thing close to originality. Phillips Acadedmy’s stan- I’ve sold a lot of books – more place with such high energy really selected to serve as the United or move to Washington. And you dardized testing program. THE PHILLIPIAN NEWS MAY 14, 2004 A8 Happenings on Campus LISOWSKI ’04 SPENDS Stephen & Martha Holder SUMMER RESEARCHING Take Students Undercover

By JOHN BADMAN CHILDHOOD LEUKEMIA CIA agent Stephen Holder agents and their work are “less and his wife Martha Holder welcomed.” By WILL ALLEN impressed students with their These areas, currently high-intensity careers last including China, North Korea, Laura Lisowski ’04 present- Friday as they spoke at an event parts of Russia, Cuba, Ukraine, ed the findings of the gene thera- sponsored by the Phillips India, and Cairo, and Iran, are py research she completed as Academy International some of the hardest places for part of the Abbot Scholars pro- Relations Symposium. CIA to work and recruit assets. gram. Mr. Holder, a former case “In denied areas I really had Last summer, Lisowski officer and the director of opera- to be aware of the environment interned at the National Institute tions in China, Taiwan, around me. In Moscow I would of Health, where she worked in a Malaysia, Italy, and the Ukraine have three men following me at lab that was investigating the for the CIA, started by talking all times, and in India the securi- development of Leukemia in a about what led him to be a CIA ty is probably the worst,” he group of children being treated officer. said. for the immune disorder XSCID. “During the start of the Ms. Holder, who worked as With the cooperation of the Vietnam War, I drew a 26, which an international water manage- National Institute of Health, meant I was going straight to ment expert for the United Lisowski was able to continue Saigon if I did not go into train- Nations Development Program, her research at Andover, examin- ing. I went to my local drafting began by stating how she ing a suspected leukemia-caus- ing insertion site in the DNA of office, and asked the officer became so involved in water primates. which languages I could study. I resources. Lisowski did not find the ended up going to Monterey She said, “At Johns Hopkins retrovirus vector in the gene she California for 57 weeks to learn I studied hydrology, and we was examining and thus con- Chinese,” he said. would raft down the Grand cluded with some certainty that Explaining how he became Canyon. We had historical pho- the cause of Leukemia in the fluent in Chinese, Ukrainian, tographs that we compared to gene therapy patients was not the Malay, Italian, French, and the canyon then to see how the insertion of the retrovirus into Spanish, Mr. Holder went on to canyon had already begun to the gene she was examining. list the colleges where he stud- change over time, and took note Lisowski volunteered in uni- ied, including Indiana of erosion and water changes.” versity laboratories during the University, Hanover College, Ms. Holder then described summer between her B. Kaiser/The Phillipian Middlebury College, Stanford how she got a job at an interna- University, and Taiwan National tional development agency. Junior and Lower years, Matt Garza ’04 embraces retiring Instructor in Spanish Becky McCann after delivering a where she was assigned to vari- speech in her honor at last week’s All-School Meeting. University. “One night at a cocktail ous projects in microbiology. Mr. Holder encouraged stu- party I was talking with a man Lisowski had developed a dents to take their foreign lan- who worked for a major interna- keen interest in gene research, Retiring Faculty Honored at ASM guage classes seriously as profi- tional developing company and and was searching for an intern- ciency in foreign languages can he found out that I spoke Mr. Cullen as a man with the “mind and as a member of the Andover open job opportunities. Ukrainian,” she said. ship in a project directly con- By FAISAL KASSAM of a teacher and the idealism of a community. nected to the human context of He said, “I sent the CIA a “His company needed some- The Phillips Academy commu- teacher.” Steve Traversio ’04 spoke in letter saying that I wanted to one who could speak the lan- DNA research. Instructor in Biology Lydia honor of Mrs. Skelton’s thirty-two She interned in the lab of Dr. nity honored and bid farewell to work for them, and that I could guage, and I had been educated eight departing members of the fac- Goetze honored the career of years as an Instructor in Music and Cynthia Dunbar, a practicing Instructor in Biology Thomas school organist, referring to her as speak Chinese. They did a back- in the field, so they hired me physician, at the NIH headquar- ulty during last Wednesday’s All- ground check on me, and hired right away,” she continued. School Meeting. Hamilton, saying that Hamilton the “grandmother of Fidelio.” ters in Bethesda, Maryland. By taught his students that they “should “Ms. Skelton was definitely me right away. Being able to Ms. Holder explained that working with Dr. Dunbar, The community came together speak another language and to the intent of World Bank, the in what Head of School Barbara and could think like biologist.” someone who led through fine Lisowski was able to witness the Math Department Chair David example rather than harsh words,” pick up languages relatively company for which she current- Chase described as a “bitter sweet quickly was a real help for me.” ly works, is to free the world potential human impact of the task to do as a school.” Penner portrayed Mr. Hannah as a Travierso continued. research she was doing. “puzzle addict” and someone with a Claudia Koh ’67, an Abbot Mr. Holder went on to from poverty. Collectively serving Phillips describe the lifestyle of a CIA She also emphasized that A resident of Washington Academy for over two hundred and “commitment to students.” Dr. Academy graduate, Phillips agent and how one becomes environmentalists are needed to state, Lisowski spent the summer fifty years, Chief Financial Officer Penner also spoke about Mr. Academy parent, and newly living at a hotel in Bethesda, Neil Cullen, Instructor in Biology Hannah’s thirty-six year tenure as a appointed Trustee of Phillips someone else when undercover. help people of impoverished spending long hours working in Thomas Hamilton, Instructor in member of the Phillips Academy Academy, spoke in honor of “At the time I didn’t know countries to use resources pru- the NIH lab and taking advan- Math Frank Hannah, Instructor in community. Instructor in English Jean St. Pierre, what I was getting into. For dently. tage of the NIH’s resources and Spanish Rebecca McCann, Describing Hannah’s many who was the first woman ever to twenty seven years I told every- She said, “In a project like opportunities. Instructor in History and Social involvements in coaching every- have chaired the Phillips Academy body I met, including one of my the Black Sea project, I helped The project to which Science James Rogers, Instructor in thing from JV Soccer to Varsity English Department. brothers, that I worked for the the countries around the water Lisowski contributed is at the Music and School Organist Carolyn Squash, Penner also spoke on Harkening back to her days as a State Department,” he said. source, in this case the six coun- forefront of genetic research. In Skelton, Instructor in English Jean Hannah’s insightful ability to solve student in Ms. St. Pierre’s English “When I took on an alias, I tries around the Black Sea, con- 2002, scientists at the Necker St. Pierre, and Instructor in French problems and his many times in class, Ms. Koh described Ms. St. had to become that person and serve their resources and man- which he had shared an “ah-hah” Pierre as someone who would Hospital in France treated 11 Hale Sturges will all be joining the do what they would do in a [par- age the effects of pollution.” moment with Hannah. “never change” and presented her children suffering from X-SCID, Class of 2004 in leaving the Phillips ticular] situation. I needed to Currently working and spe- Academy community this coming Commemorating the thirty- with a rose, a flower she believed to a life-threatening disease in seven year Andover career of be symbolic of Ms. St. Pierre as a think like them, and know cializing in African water which infants are born without a June. everything important about resource management, Ms. Various members of the com- Instructor in Spanish Rebecca person. functional immune system. McCann, Matt Garza ’04 described Tess Borden ’04 concluded by them, like their birthday and his- Holder spoke of the effects of The French researchers intro- munity delivered brief commemo- tory of where they lived and the Niger River on the nine rative speeches in honor of each of McCann as someone who was in honoring Mr. Sturges. Borden duced retroviruses with thera- the “inside and outside…just described her days as one of what they did,” he added. countries boarding it. The peutic genes into the patients. the eight individuals, whom Mrs. Mr. Holder warned of the World Bank helps the impover- Chase referred to as “eight leg- incredible.” Sturges’s students, stating she will While nine responded success- Describing Rogers as a man never forget the first day of French great danger that accompanied ished countries understand and fully to the procedure, the other endary people.” his job and shared experiences change the effects of pollution Dean of Studies Vincent Avery who’s “values have been tested” class and Mr. Sturges’ famous two developed Leukemia. in “denied areas” where CIA and water use. described Mr. Cullen as a “very and someone with a “rock of com- “Bonjour!” The Leukemia in the X-SCID brave man” and said that he has mitment” Chair of the History and patients has brought a halt to been a “just and caring steward” to Social Science Department Victor gene therapy research until the the Academy since 1986. He also Henningsen honored Roger’s exact cause of it can be deter- stated that he has come to discover famous announcer’s voice and time Gund ’04 Shares Studies on Lawrence mined. The NIH scientists inject- ed primates, which have a very By MARTIN SERNA similar genome to humans, with empty vectors to determine Katie Folkman ’04 Merges Susannah Gund ’04, who has whether it was the retroviruses had hands on experience in or another factor that caused the studying poverty in Lawrence, Leukemia. Tradition and Myth in Tales Massachusetts, shared her Abbot The NIH sent Lisowski sam- Scholar presentation about the history of this city. ples of DNA extracted from the By LIZ SLAUGHTER Gund spent time working at primates, allowing her to exam- Norse Mythology was the grade teacher added. an internship in Lawrence, in ine a particular gene that the topic of discussion during the Faulkner also said that the which she conducted a case Abbot Scholar presentation of popular Lord of the Rings trilogy NIH scientists suspected to be study of poverty in Lawrence. Katherine Folkman ’04 on was taken from sources in Norse connected with the development From the time of its found- Monday. mythology. of Leukemia. ing, Lawrence has been a center She amazed the audience with Entering Brace Center with Lisowski’s findings add one of immigration and poverty. her own take on Surner’s Mouth, little or no knowledge of Norse more piece to the massive puzzle Today, Lawrence is populat- a story about a brother’s quest to mythology, it would be difficult to of gene therapy, which could one ed by immigrants and by impov- find his twin sister. He encounters find an attendee of Faulkner’s day change the way we treat dis- erished people. Measuring six a host of supernatural creatures— presentation leaving the Brace ease. and one-half square miles and such as giants and elves— along center still ignorant of these fasci- Lisowski’s project is part of having a population of 72,000, the way. nating tales that originated in the Abbot Scholars Program, Lawrence ranks the poorest “I knew I wanted to take a Norway over eight centuries ago. which gives PA seniors the community in Massachusetts Norse myth and write it in my Faulkner’s story was eloquent opportunity to peruse independ- and 23rd in the U.S. ent projects and to present their own yet factu- Poor quality of education findings to the PA community in words,” “She stood arms upraised, close to the al, the also causes severe consequences a public forum. saidsky. She felt powerful and proud. She knew audience in Lawrence. In 1997, the Lisowski was assisted by Folkman. the strength of her father and her people. learned Lawrence Public Schools lost faculty advisor Jeremiah Hagler, She She had only one fear and she would not quite a bit their state accreditation and a PA instructor and visiting read the find it in the endless winter around her. In about now, less than 60% of Lawrence Courtesy of Arielle Filiberti scholar in molecular biology. first five that second, however, Gerda felt that she Norse High School students graduate Susannah Gund ’04 talks with a student in her dorm after her pages of was not alone. She looked behind her, but mytholo- with a diploma. Abbot Scholar Presentation on the city of Lawrence. her paper, gy there was nobody. The cavernous hall was Mill owners built the city was the first of its kind in Mills, the makers of Polartec captivating empty. There were only the skulking curs through 159 years ago, with a plan to the audi- only five America. fleece, survive in the textile standing watch. maximize production from the “People from over thirty dif- industry. ence with, pages of workers that would live there. in the KATIE FOLKMAN story. One ferent countries struck the mills Lawrence Community These mill owners lived across together and despite the ethnic Works, the organization with words of fellow Abbot Scholar interesting fact that Folkman the border in Andover. Even Susannah Gund ’04, a “beautiful added during her presentation was differences that divided the city, which Gund was affiliated dur- today, the border between they managed to unite under the ing her internship, institutes pro- and quite accessible story.” that Norse mythology was largely Lawrence and Andover divides Folkman’s story revolved recorded by Christians. common goal to receive not just grams and committees to better two areas of starkly contrasting fair wages, bread, but also more the Lawrence community. LCW around a love connection between Faulkner took the time at the wealth. two main characters Gerda and end of her presentation to thank decent hours, roses,” said Gund. plays a massive role in the clean The 19th century potato Following the strike, up and positive reinforcement in Frey (the goddess of winter and Mrs. Penner in the library, her famine in Ireland, which coin- Lawrence improved and even the city of Lawrence. ganization the god of sun respectively.) advisors: Mr. Bardo and Mr. cided with the founding of received national recognition. tries to “reverse the curse” on Citing the Greek and Roman O’Conner, and all the other abbot Lawrence, caused Irish immi- However, the immigration the city of Lawrence and move it mythology classes she took in the scholars. This was Faulkner’s first grants in desperate need of laws of the 1920s severely into a future that holds opportu- fourth grade as her motivation, time writing fiction, and when employment to flood into the injured the Lawrence mills, nity and good fortune. Katie said that she wants to asked if she is considering pub- mills looking for work. which relied almost exclusively expose younger audiences to lishing, she said, “I don’t know.” As the 20th century came on immigrant labor. The latest Norse myths. Upon completion, Faulkner’s around, other waves of immigra- wave of immigration has been ABBOT SCHOLAR NOTE “I think the concept is really myth will be up to 50 pages. tion occurred, and the ethnic from Puerto Rico and the An article on Jess Chermayeff brilliant and I want to ask my Faulkner will leave Andover tensions rose. Dominican Republic. K. Matsumoto/The Phillipian ninth graders to do on a smaller to attend the University of ’04’s presentation will appear Lawrence is most renowned Today, the mills are idle, Laura Lisowski ’04 presented scale what you have done,” a Georgia next fall. next week due to space for its famous labor strike, the behemoth reminders of the her cancer research last member of the audience and ninth constraints. Wednesday in Kemper. Bread and Roses Strike, which city’s golden era. Only Malden CMYK B

Volume CXXVII, Number 10 Phillips Academy, Andover, Massachusetts May 14, 2004 SCOTT RECEIVES BOYS CREW SINKS EXETER INTERNATIONAL PREMIER DEGREE Completes Nine Day Session

Soccer Coach Earns Highest Level of Coaching Diploma

by Katie Faulkner PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER

Bill Scott, coach of the Andover Boys Varsity Soccer Team, recently received an International Premier coach- ing diploma, the highest level of coach- ing degree. The Premier Course is a 50-hour course “designed to teach advanced methodology with full-sided soccer Courtsey of John Dykema (11vs.11) as its focal point.” The Andover B1 boat pushes past Exeter at the finish line last Saturday for a huge victory over its archrival. The Big Blue second boat also downed the Big Red Mr. Scott traveled in April to to complete an Andover sweep on the day. the Lillehshall National Soccer no attention to the small head- rowing at a higher rate consistent- vation from Sherman ’04, the stantly since the first race but we Centre in England to participate in by Simon Keyes wind on the river and devoted all ly.” eight Andover rowers began to finally found a winning combina- a nine-day training session that PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER of their efforts towards defeating Even with the quick start, “empty the tank.” The all-out tion. I think this will give us a lot examined different aspects of the Andover 4:44.8 a tough Exeter team. Andover found themselves five sprint to the finish was enough to of confidence to pull faster in the game, including lectures on sys- Exeter 4:45.6 The B1 crew sped off at an seats behind the Exeter boat. fend off a gaining Exeter boat, last two races of the season.” tems of play, team management, early blistering pace of 43 strokes Andover however, began walking and Andover won narrowly by a B2 maintained the Andover psychology, nutrition, and fitness. The Andover Boys Crew per minute, more than seven in the second 500 meters. The mere 0.7 seconds, by far the clos- sweep by beating Exeter by a There was an equal amount of time team, ready to turn its season strokes per minute faster than conservative base rate of 36spm est race in years. solid second and half. Andover’s spent on the field performing the around, headed their average rate, and soon after kept the rowers fresh for their first Kyle Davies ’05 said of the B2 finished with a time of 4:51.9, techniques presented in the class- out to the they settled back down into a base walk of the race. Sarah Sherman race, “After the sprint everyone while Exeter lagged behind at room. Merrimack river rate of 36spm. Jasper Perkins ’04 ’04 called for a power ten at the on the boat just collapsed. But we 4:53.0. Going out hard, the boys There were four assessments to take on Tabor explained, “Before last weekend, 800-meter mark, and the Big Blue were all in high spirits because we were worried they would lose that Mr. Scott was graded on while and their arch our base rating was 34.5, and we pulled five seats ahead of Exeter. had pulled well and beat Exeter.” their momentum. “It was at 600 being considered for the diploma, including a match analysis of a nemesis, Exeter. rode against Exeter at a 36. The With only the final sprint left Andover came through with the meters when I was afraid we Wolverhampton vs. Middlebrough CREW The rowers paid week before we had practiced in the race, and with much moti- win at 4:44.8, Exeter followed at would start dropping back,” said the two seed with a time of stroke Justin Yi ’06, “but once we game, the creation of a training ses- 4:45.5, and Tabor brought up the heard the crowd, we knew we sion to address the weaknesses of rear with a time 4:55.6. were close and that we would not the Middlesbrough defense in the The last sprint was the key to give up our lead to a gaining aftermath of the game, an oral Andover’s victory. The final blis- Exeter boat.” Former rower exam, and a field session where he tering pace was due in large part Taylor Washburn ’03 said of B2’s trained a group of players on a spe- to the hard work the boys had put fast start, “I honestly thought that cific topic provided by instructors. in during the week leading up to those boys were going to die. To be eligible for the Premier the race. Said coach Washburn, They were racing a quite a high Course, coaches must be a member “We worked very hard on the rate.” B2 however rose to the of the National Soccer Coaches Association of America (NSCAA), sprints over the week, and it paid challenge and maintained its lead. and also must have earned the off. We were barely able to pull it Beaming with confidence Advanced National Diploma with a out solely because of the sprint.” after beating their archrivals, the “Distinguished Pass” grade. Other Winning this race was crucial Andover Varsity Boys Crew team criteria include coaching and play- for the Andover B1 team. Davies prepares for next Saturday when ing background, community lead- noted, “This was a huge victory they face a good test versus ership and contribution to the for Andover. We have moved peo- Northfield Mount Hermon at game. The Director of Coaching ple around in the boat almost con- home on the Merrimack River. Continued on Page B6, Column 6 Andover Baseball Bows to Tabor, Knocked from Playoff Contention by Alex Lebow defense. On the mound, starter grounded out to score Conner PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER Church surrendered five hits in Hoesley ‘04, who had reached on the first two innings, including a a single. McDonald showed off After an exhausting stretch of solo home run. Nonetheless, his wheels on the base paths, seven games in twelve days, the Church settled down and proved stealing two in the second and Phillips his hold on his control, with no fourth. Andover hoped to meet Academy walks in the complete game Exeter once more in the champi- Varsity Baseball effort. onship round of the tournament, team must now In the second game of the but with the Andover loss to accept that even day, Andover ace Adam Crabtree Tabor, and an Exeter sweep over the best of ball continued his weekly strikeout NMH, this must wait until next BASEBALL clubs struggle in barrage, ringing up nine, but season. the most decisive games. lacked necessary defensive sup- With the thought of back-to- As a team with six returnees port, allowing two unearned back losses to Exeter as its moti- from 2003, the Big Blue floun- Exeter runs to cross the plate. vation, Andover battled at home dered early this spring with the For the Big Blue’s first and only against the aggressive Cushing youngsters battling the “varsity run of the second game, second Penguins, who once again shut jitters” and veterans suffering baseman Kevin McGravey ‘04 Continued on Page B2, Column 4 from injuries. However, with the B. Kaiser/The Phillipian progression of the season, Amy Prosper ’06 winds up against Deerfield on Saturday. Prosper struck out 13 and yielded Andover gained confidence and only eight hits to lead her team to an impressive 1-0 victory. timely momentum. Unfortunately, a 10-4 loss Wednesday to Tabor Academy Prosper ’06 Fuels Softball Resurgence, lands the team in the consolation round of the CNEPSBL. In the heartfelt loss, the bats lacked the Team Takes Two of Three on the Week flair needed to spark an offensive by Merit Webster Regardless of the large mar- singles, striking out four, and comeback. Tom Church ’05 PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER gin of victory for Andover, walking none. Deerfield’s started, with Jamie Durkin ’05 in relief, and both surrendered runs Andover 9 Stoneleigh-Burnham initially downfall resulted from errors, put up a good fight. The fourth and PA was quick to take advan- to a superior Tabor offense. At Stoneleigh-Burnham 1 inning began with the score tied tage of the Big Green’s faults. In the plate, Adam Crabtree ‘04 did his best to initiate an early rally Andover 1 1-1. However, Andover took the bottom of the third inning, advantage of the struggling Merit Webster ’06 took first with a two run dinger in the first Deerfield 0 pitcher and hit five singles in the base on an error, and the Green inning. In spite of that, the offense did not strike again until fourth to make the score 6-1. committed yet another error on Brooks 3 the fifth, when two runners Andover 1 From there, the Big Blue never a grounder that gave PA the first crossed the plate. The loss con- let up. PA stretched its lead in and only run of the game. cludes the 2004 regular season the bottom of the sixth inning on Prosper explained, The beginning of May for Phillips Academy, and lands another rally, including a double “Although Deerfield was such a brought both great weather for them at 6-10, a record that surely from Lindsay Maroney ’07, to close game, it didn’t seem like and solid does not indicate the true talent finish the game 9-1. it. Everyone was confident and games from the of the ball club. After an exciting win in the relaxed. As a team we went onto Andover In the doubleheader versus first contest of the day, Andover the field and played our best; Varsity Girls Exeter two weeks ago, the Big prepped itself for a tough game and we knew it, without think- Softball team. Blue matched up against against Deerfield. ing about how close the game With a double Exeter’s two most dominant SOFTBALL Due to injuries and other cir- actually was and who was win- pitchers. While DH Jed header on cumstances, pitcher Amy ning. This game proved to us as McDonald ’04 touched “Exie” Saturday, the Lady Blue pound- Prosper ’06 and catcher Megan a team how when we stay men- starter Andy Gale ‘04 for a home ed out a 9-1 win against Winn ’05 resumed their posi- tally focused, we really have a run and a single, the Andover Stoneleigh-Burnham and con- tions after only 20 minutes of dominating presence on the offense could not bruise the tinued its momentum by beating rest. The challenging game field. It’s unfortunate that we’ve opposition’s pitching, recording a previously undefeated proved to be an intense pitching had such a hard time concentrat- only five hits and one run in the Deerfield team 1-0. Even in duel. Deerfield’s number one ing on the game because, as evi- first game. The team struck the spite of a 3-1 loss to Brooks on pitcher allowed only one hit, dent on Saturday when we beat ball well, but with a near twenty Monday, the softball team has E. Gelb/The Phillipian striking out nine, and walking a team with an 8-0 record, we mile-per-hour headwind, the ball demonstrated its potential to Tom Church ’05 pitches during the Andover Varsity Baseball two, and Prosper giving up four found the mitts of the opposing play at a higher level. Continued on Page B2, Column 5 team’s game against Deerfield last Saturday. B2 THE PHILLIPIAN SPORTS MAY 14, 2004 Girls Track Sprints Past Cushing by Sean Hamilton difference in the 300m hurdles for a junior and brought her ever PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER was the same, with their times closer to the class record. of 50 and 50.1 seconds. Both In the shot put, Aba Temeng Andover 118 Tognoni and Schnure will be ’06, Ashley Gray ’05, and Yaa Cushing 0 vital in Andover’s hope to take Frimpong ’05 combined for nine home the trophy on Saturday points for the big blue. Temeng The Andover girls track with their teamwork and depth. hurled the shot a daunting team showed their sportsman- Jeannette Francis ’06 won 30’4”, and Gray and Frimpong ship last the Pole vault uncontested, were not far behind, marking Wednesday launching herself over the bar at distances of 28’10” and 28’8” GIRLS TRACK against a five- 6’6”. respectively. athlete squad Schnure, Thurman, and Johanna Marmelejos ’04 from Cushing. Andover show- Mulroy returned in the Long won the javelin throw, tossing cased its depth, winning every jump where they completed the for 84’6”. Jenn Mecham ’06 fol- point in the entire meet, running sweep for Andover. Schnure lowed close by in second with a the score to a ridiculous 118-0. jumped 15’6”, with Thurman distance of 82’7” Cassie Tognoni ’05 had an just a few inches adrift. Andover’s 4x100m-relay impressive day at the high jump Schnure’s newfound skill in the team experienced some difficul- mat, where she managed to leap long jump has been a pleasant ty with their handoffs but still over the bar at an astounding surprise this season for the managed to win convincingly by height of 5’2”, her highest jump coaches’ commitment to over ten seconds. ever. increase Andover’s already deep Both the “A” and the “B” Captain Lissy Robie ’04 team. 4x400m relay teams managed to competed in the 800m and the Freshmen Thurman and beat the Cushing team by over Courtesy of Morissa Sobelson 4x400m relay, a new event for Mulroy took first and second in 30 seconds, truly exemplifying Dave Morse ’04 rounds a corner during last Wednesday’s criterium bike race. Morse finished a her. Her victory in the 800m the triple jump. Thurman’s leap the depth of the Andover girls close second to a rider from Holderness. with a time of 2:24.8 seconds of 31’4” is an impressive mark team. tied her personal best, a good sign for her peak at Interschols. PA Cycling Finishes First at Exeter, Ali Holliday ’06 ran a steady race to take second place at 2:30.7 with Becca Howe ’06 finishing shortly after. Morse ’04 Takes Second at Proctor In the 1500m Abbe King ’07 by Dave Morse In the men’s B division, new- Clay and Roldan, in eighth and ran an impressive race, crossing PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER comers Alex Hugon ’07 and James tenth, respectively. the line with a time of 5:30, a Krendal-Clark ’07 worked well In the men’s B race, Hugon solid mark for the end of the Last weekend Andover hopped together and finished in 8th place. had a strong showing at the front season. Debbie Khun ’05 fol- over to the neighboring Exeter In the womens race, Arielle until his chain dropped and he fell lowed in a time of 5:51, and vet- campus for a Filiberti ’07 and Lily Stein ’07 off the back of the pack. Krendal- eran distance runner Celia thrilling Team hoped to race the best of them. Clark and Bowen both pushed Alexander ’04, returning from Time Trial. The Stein took a spill on a sharp turn, hard and finished with the pack. injury, finished in under 6 min- further setting back the duo. Still In the women’s A-pack Mens A-divi- utes. pressing on, the two girls finished Filiberti had her strongest showing sion completed Freshman star Colleen ten laps, with seventh. Up-and-coming riders yet, working with two other girls Clarissa Deng ’05 and Isabel to catch speedy Exeter racer Thurman ’07 won the 100m eleven paired dash in 13.4. Rosie DuPont ’06 teams contest- Ritchie ’05 rode efficiently Stebbins ’05 in a breakaway. In the CYCLING and Alison Occhiuti ’06 fol- ing in the race. through the turns tocome in sixth final stretch, Filiberti bid her pur- place. suit cohorts adieu and finished lowed in second and third, Captain Thatcher Clay ’04 and respectively, to clinch more teammate Dave Morse ’04 pow- This past Wednesday was the ahead of them in second place. New England Prep League Stein, the other PA woman rider in points for Big Blue. ered their way to a decisive victo- In the 200m dash, Annie ry, completing the course 34 sec- Championships, hosted by Proctor the women’s A race, finished well Wilkin ’05, Maura Mulroy ’07 onds faster than the second place School in Loudon, NH. The cri- in the pack. pair. Coach Thayer Zaeder said, terium style race is particularly The women’s B race had equal and Occhiuti completed the “From a coaches perspective exciting, as it takes place at the success, with Ritchie and Deng sweep for Andover, with times [Saturday’s] win was a marvelous Loudon NASCAR International placing first and third, respective- all under 30 seconds. thing to watch.... like clockwork; Speedway. ly. Murphy and Morissa Sobelson Old hands to the hurdles, fluid, powerful, unbeatable.” In the men’s A race, the pack ’05 followed moments behind in Tognoni and Marty Schnure ’06 Anthony Roldan ’04 paired up stayed together to the sprint finish. the pack. finished first and second, with B rider Nick Bowen ’06 and There were a few breakaway With just three races left in the respectively, in both the 100m racked up impressive results. attempts, and Morse’s two-lap season, the men’s A team is well in hurdles and the 300m hurdles. Despite Bowen’s move up from breakaway was the largest margin first place for league points. In the 100m hurdles, Tognoni the B division to race with Roldan, gained that day. In the final sprint, Currently, Clay is placed second and Schnure finished just a tenth B. Kaiser/The Phillipian the pair still pedaled their way to a Morse was beaten by a bike’s for individual rider league points, of a second apart crossing in Merit Webster ’06 prepares to step up to the plate during last respectable sixth place. length to take second overall, with Morse creeping behind in 17.3 seconds and 17.4 seconds, week’s game against Deerfield. closely followed by teammates third. respectively. Surprisingly, their LOSS TO TABOR PA Softball on the Upswing, DROPS ANDOVER Ready for Big East Tourney Continued from Page B1, Column 3 the beginning, we played a good are a very good team.” game, but our trouble in the first On Monday, the Softball inning put a damper on the rest FROM TOURNEY team was not as successful. of the game. It was frustrating to Roaring to life in the first inning have the first three or four bat- Consolation Begins Tomorrow with a double, single, and then ters get on base and score a run another double, Brooks quickly without getting an out. earned a 2-0 lead. Frustrated as Afterwards, we picked up a little Baseball Falls Short Andover was, the Big Blue did on defense, but our offense not let Brooks’ early lead thwart never got going. We just weren’t of Championship its enthusiasm. hitting, and crucial hits are key Tournament Although Andover had diffi- for winning any softball game.” culty hitting Brooks’ pitcher The problem with Andover’s Continued from Page B1, Column 6 (she pitched a three-hitter), PA losses, Voorhees explained, is down the Blue offense. Starter played a solid game defensively that “we seem to play really well Durkin let up six runs over five and committed only one error. when we're mentally into the innings to a solid Cushing squad. Pitcher Prosper quickly regained game but when we're not, we are Andover’s flawless defense aided her composure after a disap- visibly out of sync as a team.” the pitching, but the offense only pointing first inning and gave up Luckily, Andover will have crossed the plate twice, coming in only two other hits, no walks, four days of much needed rest to the fifth inning on single by Evan and striking out four batters re-establish the team’s mental Platt ‘06. throughout the rest of the game. game before it hosts an eight- Not prepared to let the team From her position behind the team Big East Tournament this slip to more than a three game plate, catcher Winn threw out weekend. loosing streak, the Big Blue dom- two of three would-be base run- Hopefully, the softball team inated Deerfield in both games of ners. will have the opportunity to this past Saturday’s doublehead- “We just weren’t mentally prove its intensity when every er. In the second game, Crabtree ready to play,” said captain player is completely focused on E. Gelb/The Phillipian demonstrated his superb ability Dorothy Voorhees ’04. “Minus the game at hand. Jen Feeny ’04 keeps her eye on the ball while battling a Milton opponent last week. The with a near “no-no.” With one Andover Girls Varsity Lacrosse team won the game 7-2. out in the top of the seventh, Crabtree allowed his first hit of the day, a weak single barely fair N.E. #1 Ranked Loomis Chaffee down the right field line. With a total of three DA base runners all afternoon, Crabtree took com- Too Much for Andover Lady Lax plete control in his most impres- WRITE sive stint of the season. The ace despite its fast start, the Big Blue ciously pursuing the ball. As a by Gordon Murphy helped his efforts on the mound slowed down midway through result, Loomis constantly con- PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER on the other side of the ball, the first half. Loomis’ amazing trolled possession, sealing Loomis 14 reaching on a triple and a double, stick skills baffled Andover Andover’s fate. which knocked in two runners. FOR Andover 3 defenders, giving Loomis several Eventually, the Andover Tom Dignard ’06 and Evan Platt good shooting opportunities. The defense became tired from being ’06 each sent a runner across the Last Saturday, the Lady Blue Loomis players shot hard shots at on their defensive end for so plate. Giving up only two runs, stepped out onto the field as the goalie’s elbows, the hardest long, and broke down shortly Crabtree led his ball club to a 6-2 underdogs to spot for a goalie to make a save. into the second half, allowing victory in the first game of the SPORTS the number- At the half, the score was 5-1, Loomis to break open the game. day. one ranked Pelicans. The Big Blue, however, did The Big Blue added another team in New “They were a very hard team not go down without a fight. tally to the win column Monday England, the to stop,” commented Laurel Kinnon McCall ’04 had two with a 6-5 victory over BB&N. ’CAUSE ALL OUR Pelicans of Sticklor ’05, “I think we played goals; Rachel Harmeling ’04 had Walks leading to runs hurt PA GIRLS LACROSSE Loomis very well in the first half, consid- a goal and an assist, with Sticklor starter Platt, but with McGravey Chaffee. ering their stick skills and ath- tallying an assist as well. and Mike Foley ‘04 in relief, SENIORS ARE Entering the game with an 8-3 leticism.” With the final whistle nearing Andover held BB&N at bay record, the Andover Girls In the second half, Loomis’ and Andover down by several while the offense scored five in Lacrosse team could not keep up zone defense stifled any and all goals, Loomis had proved itself the fifth and one in the sixth. with the best of the league. of Andover’s scoring chances. as the faster, more skillful, and Even though the most recent “TOO BUSY” TO WRITE Andover started off strong, The Pelican defenders did well to more experienced team. Andover loss eliminates Andover from and actually had the first three pick up players cutting to the fought hard, but eventually championship contention, the shots of the game, but eventually goal, forcing many Andover resigned to a loss. team can still end the season on a THEIR ARTICLES Loomis’ aggressiveness, athletic turnovers. Loomis capitalized on Now, the Big Blue looks high note with a win over ability and stick skills took those mistakes all day long, cre- ahead to the always-tough Cushing in the league tournament charge, completing a 14-3 romp ating fast breaks that resulted in Thayer Academy, and beyond to tomorrow. The best baseball over Andover. several scoring chances. the Eastern Independent League teams are known to bounce back Thanks x2594 The Big Blue missed two of Andover was on its heels for Invitational Tournament. from a decisive loss and win the its high-impact players, Kelly much of the game due to costly Andover won the tournament in next game with spirit and vigor. Stecker ’05 and Kat Conlon ’04. turnovers and lackluster ground 2001 and 2003. The 2002 tourna- As the team wraps up its sea- A Lot x6804 Stecker is the usual starting cen- ball play. Loomis dominated the ment was canceled due to rain, son, we hope the best for ter, and Conlon is a starting ground ball fight, showing their so Andover looks for an opportu- pitcher/first baseman Matt defender. Regardless, Andover athleticism and aggressiveness. nity to win for three concurrent Boylan ’06 who suffered an unfortunate, season-ending injury ’04 x2655 started out strong, taking the first Loomis also owned the draws, championships, a truly impres- in practice last week. three shots of the game. But getting better position and tena- sive feat. Get well soon, Matty. THE PHILLIPIAN SPORTS MAY 14, 2004 B3 Boys Track Smokes C.A., Prepares for Interschols by Greg Hsu PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER into third place with 24.6sec. The Boys Track team was not Despite the fact that Galan has run a bit worried about the competi- this particular race very few times, tion they faced he is already seeded as fourth with from Cushing Sheldon seeded third in the BOYS TRACK Academy, who Interschols preliminary sheets. they crushed with Knef King ’04 had a huge day a score of 118-18 last Wednesday. in the 400m, rushing into first with Looking to motivate their ath- a lightning 50.6 seconds, followed letes during this final stretch, both by teammate Kojo Degraft- Coach Corbin Lang and Coach Hanson ’05 four seconds behind, Lou Bernieri said, “This is the edging past the line just ahead of meet where some make the the Cushing opponent. Interschols team and some don’t.” In the 110m Hurdles, Sam The Andover boys began the duPont ’04 and Edwin Kulubya meet with a tremendous start, as ‘06 took first and second places both the Varsity and JV 4x100m with 16.7sec and 17.04sec respec- Relay squads beat their Cushing tively, with Kulubya finishing a competitors. full 3 seconds ahead of his Josh Barclay ’05 jumped a Cushing competitor. Tyler Simms personal-best of 6’0” in the High ’04 came in first at a quick 43.6 Jump, moving to solidify his slot seconds in the 300m Hurdles, and as an Interschols competitor. Team duPont in second place with member Callistus Onyiuke ’05 44.8sec. took third place with 5’8”. In the discus, only Captain Tolu Wusu ’04 won the Triple Anwell Lanfranco ’04 scored for Jump with 44’3”. Mike Eruzione Andover. Lanfranco continued to ’04 came in second with 38’3.5,” a lead by example in the shot put, mark made even more impressive where he took first with a throw of given his long time on the injured 49’7.5”, and Aaron O’Hern ‘’07 E. Gelb /The Phillipian list. Wusu continued to contribute, placed third with 42’6.5”. Lauren Blas ’05 and Margaret Kelly ’06 play in last week’s match against Milton. PA Girls tennis suffered an 18-0 loss to the tennis powerhouse. The girls also fell to Thayer Academy 14-4 this past Wednesday. landing first in the Long Jump at Javelin-specialist Pat Holkins 21’7.5” and first in the 100m with ’04 pushed his way to first again, 11.5sec. He will be a great asset taking out the competition and for the Big Blue when he com- dwarfing his previous perform- PA Girls Tennis Comes up Short against Thayer, petes in multiple events at the ances with a huge 164’8” throw. championship meet. Jonathan Dent ’05 matched his The Distance crew took the earlier distances, measured at Gets Ready for Rematch Against Archrival Exeter opportunity to switch up their run- 158’10”, with Jeffrey Pena in third by Lucretia Witte with determination and grace. Sarah Chang ’05 stepped up to ing of Grace and Witte, Kelly and ners and their events on at 137’11”. PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER With the usual number one, the third slot against one of Chang. However, the combined Wednesday. In the 1500m, scoring The 4 x 400m Relay was a Margaret Kelly, ’06, suffering Thayer’s new recruits. Chang strength and versatility of the runners John Freker ’04, and spectacle for Andover fans as the Thayer 14 from strep throat, number-two played well, but she was worn Thayer girls proved too much for Uppers Chris Donais and Jon Varsity squad roared through the Andover 4 player Diana Grace ’05 stepped down by the heat and could not an ailing Kelly, and the two could Hillman all ran under 4:30, finish line at 3:35, followed by up to the number-one spot. hang in until the end, losing 4-6, not summon up enough intensity respectable times given their lack both JV Andover squads before Under blistering sun and with Grace’s opponent was Paula 0-6. for a win, losing 3-6, 0-6. At the of competition. Ben Bramhall ’07, Cushing eventually crossed the only a fraction of its players, the McGinnis, who is active in tour- With number five, Alice second slot, Chang and Chan in a Sean Hamilton ’06 and Kevin line. The Andover times differed girls’ tennis team nament play and is ranked tenth Campbell ’05, injured as well, fought well but lost 3-6, 3-6. At Daly ’05 came in afterwards, com- by10 seconds between each squad, turned up to play in New England for 16 and under sixth player Alyssa Hill ’06 made third doubles was the usual pair- pleting a first through sixth sweep once again showing that Andover the formidable girls. Grace played well, making the big jump up to number four. ing of Hill and Watson, and for Andover. can rely on the depth of all of its Thayer Academy. use of her renowned shot selec- Unfortunately, Campbell fell 1-6, though they pulled out showy For the 800m, Adam Kapor athletes in any situation. Though Big tion, but McGinnis was patient 2-6 o her Thayer opponent. strategies and signaling, they lost ’04 took an anticipated first place Captain Lanfranco said to the GIRLS TENNIS Blue’s weakened and won 6-1, 6-1. However, her doubles partner and 5-7, 6-7 in a heartbreaker of a with 2:03.4, followed by Dan team on Monday, “This is it. We lineup fought At the second slot, Kelly did seventh slot player Julia Watson match. Serna ’04 and Hamilton. have to work hard this week. This hard, in the end Thayer’s sea- her best to battle the suffocating ’07, was more than ready for the After the match, Coach In the 200m, O’Shea Galan is Interschols week. Saturday is soned team finished off the heat and her illness against an challenge that Thayer’s number Martha Grant was still optomistic ’04, seeking to submit a good time the most important day of the year, Andover girls for a score of 14 equally challenging Thayer oppo- five offered her. She ate up her about the team’s prospects going for his Interschols seed, ran the more important than prom, more sets to 4. nent. After many frustrating and opponent and sailed through to forward. “I anticipate our peak race for only his second time this important than graduation.” With two players injured and long games, Kelly’s determina- win 6-1, 6-2. Finally, Stephanie next Wednesday for the Exeter season. Clocked at 23.4sec in first With this mentality, the one suffering from a bad case of tion and great strategies won her Chan ‘05 from the Varsity B to rematch,” said Coach Grant. place, O’Shea was closely fol- Andover Boys hope to maintain strep throat, the PA lineup was the match 7-5, 7-5. play at number six, but lost 4-6, And Exeter, of course, is the lowed by David Sheldon ’04 the dynasty and bring home their not in peak condition to face the While Lucretia Witte ’06, the 4-6 to her Thayer opponent. perfect time to peak. 23.4sec, with Greg Hsu ’06 sliding fourth consecutive trophy. toughest team in the league. usual number three, was side- In the doubles, numbers one However, as always, the Blue lined with a knee injury from the and two Grace and Kelly part- Ladies showed up and played Milton match last week, Captain nered, rather than the usual pair- ATHLETIC SLATE

Friday, May 14 GV Lacrosse @ Thayer 4:30 GV Softball Big East 4:00

Saturday, May 15 BV Baseball @ Tournament 9:00 BV Crew N.M.H. 1:30 GV Crew N.M.H. 1:30 Cycling @ Profile 11:00 Golf @ Exeter/GDA 3:00 BV Lacrosse @ Choate 3:30 GV Softball Big East 10:00 BV Tennis @ Tournament 9:30 GV Track @ Interchols (Exeter) 10:00 BV Track @ Interchols (Exeter) 10:00 Ultimate @ Greenfield Tournament 9:15 BV Volleyball @N.M.H. 1:00

E. Gelb/The Phillipian Wednesday, May 19 Sophie McCoy ’04 guards her opponent during last week’s all-girls game against Andover High Cycling @ New Hampton 3:00 School. PA lost the match 12-1. BV Lacrosse @ Pomfrett 4:00 GV Lacrosse @ Brooks 2:45 Ultimate Takes Third in Tournament GV Softball @ GDA 3:15 by Mac King Ultimate League (NEPSUL) tour- matched, trading points one after Andover High School 3:30 PHILLIPIAN SPORTS ASSOCIATE nament. Coached by themselves another. Unfortunately, with the BV Tennis (Andover’s Coach Paul Hoenig score tied at three apiece, thanks to @ Exeter 3:00 GV Tennis Off to a rather depressing start, was managing the 13 team tour- sloppy play on the Andover end, Ultimate Exeter 3:15 yet in the midst of a two-game win ney), the Boys in Blue were seed- Milton scored a point with the streak, the Andover Ultimate team ed third in their division, fifth wind. This lone point against the entered last Sunday’s PA-hosted overall, and came out pumped to wind was the difference in the tournament determined to step up play. The first game of the day, game, and from here on out Milton their game. After losing the first however, was nothing to brag and Andover traded points evenly game of the day to North Field about. Despite strong play from until Milton reached the hard cap Mount Hermon, a resurrected team Captain Martin Quinones of 10. Final score: 10-7. Andover rebounded and played ’04, the team lost a crucial match Disappointed, sore, but happy some of the best Ultimate they had to NMH, with a final score of 12- at the opportunity to play Ultimate played all season. 4. for an entire day, the Andover Following their loss, Big Blue The boys rebounded quickly, squad took on St. Margaret’s in the utterly demolished the Cambridge however, tearing apart CSW’s wind. St. Margaret’s and Phillips School of Weston 13-4 and St. zone defense and succeeding in the Academy played similar Ultimate, Johnsbury 13-1. With two wins use of their long option. Showing trading points until the game was under their belts, the Andover his lack of hesitation in the use of called because of unbearable wind squad was now seeded second in his powerful backhand, George and rain. The final score was 5-5 their original division and went on Hattemer ’06 played exceptionally and the game concluded in a tie. to play Milton, the top team in the well in this game. As expected, NMH triumphed other division. After a heartbreak- The Boys in Blue kept up their over Milton in the finals, and PA’s ing loss to Milton, PA played St. elite level of play throughout the finish was good enough for a third Margarets McTernan, and due to St. Johnsbury game, playing fero- place tie with St. Margaret’s. weather a draw, the score was ciously on offense and allowing St. This last Wednesday was not a declared at 5-all. At the end of the Johnsbury to score a mere one pretty day for the Andover day, the team had played extraordi- point while on defense. Lowers Ultimate team. In the second co-ed narily well, and their level of play Peter Kalamakis ‘06 and Hattemer, game of the season, Andover took was good enough for a third place led by Captain Rohit Acharya ’04, on the Masco Ultimate team on finish. Unfortunately, Andover handled the disc nicely, and, as in their home turf. After wracking up Ultimate dropped a big game the CSW game, did not hold back three points, the Andover team’s against Masco this past with their long throws. level of play began to slide, and Wednesday. Andover team then played Masco took home the win, a victo- On Sunday morning, prepared Milton, the top seeded team in the ry that should have been for the first ever New England other division. Andover and Andover’s without much contest. Milton began play evenly B4 THE PHILLIPIAN FEATURES May 14, 2004

by Christian Vareika “The A-Team” when Murdock keep away government agents – by Gabe Worgaftik FEATURES DESDEMONA FEATURES PUCK went on “Wheel of Fortune” and one can never be too careful. Pat Sajak guest starred? That For whatever reason, Mr. T was pretty awesome, but what didn’t write back, so I went to Like so many Uppers, this I love Shakespeare. From his was the deal with that episode the world’s most reliable source term I have found myself tragedies to his beautiful son- where the A-Team got beat up – the Internet! It would be just engulfed in the epic works of nets, if it has something to do by a bunch of old people from my luck that as soon as I started the world’s most brilliant with old man Bill Shakespeare, the retirement home – I didn’t surfing, an ad popped up offer- dramatist: no, not Gary Busey – chances are I’ve read it (unlike- like that, but I digress. The rea- ing to trace my family tree! I’m talking about Bill ly), seen it in a movie (more son I’m writing you this week is Understandably, I was intrigued Shakespeare. In fact, I’ve likely,) or eaten a small bit of to find out why I like and investigated further into this become so obsessed with his the paper it was written on (very Shakespeare so much. I know genealogy offer. Five hours later works that I have decided to likely.) Sometimes my love of that you have a Shakespeare that website had 450 of my dol- offer my own rendition of a set Shakespeare is even a bit per- foundation, or at least I think I lars, plus my power of attorney, plexing to me, so recently I of Shakespearean sonnets enti- had a dream where you opened a but I had the information I tled, Tomfoolery in Wenchdom. decided to find out exactly why Shakespeare foundation and sought. Despite the fact that I I am so fond of the world’s most then some bad guys try to blow have not a drop of English blood Sonnet 37 famous playwright. The best up your van, and you just aren’t in me, the website informed me way to get information is to ask Dearest Esther, having it, and you’re all like “I that I am indeed a direct male- With your gloves of rubber, someone, and that’s exactly pity the foo who tries to ruin Mr. line descendant of one William Though the bacteria may what I did. Not quite knowing T’s black tie reception for his Shakespeare – chomp on that where to start, I wrote a letter to new Shakespeare foundation,” Paris Hilton, you and your little fester, J. Yi/The Phillipian the man who has provided me and major pitying ensues. Either rat dog! I love no other. Christian Vareika ’05 woos Reuben Han ’04 with Hamlet, with guidance throughout my way, get back to me on the Of course, with such revela- while Reuben woos his online girlfriend, KittyKatStar1313. life… Your monkey bread, Shakespeare thing. tions come new privileges. For Sonnet 198 So stale and light, instance, in all my English Oh, Cassie Tognoni From daybreak till midnight Dear Mr. T, My heart fills with dread - Sincerely, Mike Piazza classes, my teachers must So stunning in pastels I toil away When you go home for the henceforth refer to me as Sir. Have you ever driven a It just wouldn’t seem right Remember the episode of I signed it Mike Piazza to Also, I get to teach the class— night. Zamboni? To have a relaxing day. I’m Shakespeare damnit! Also, I Gee, that’s swell. hereby decree that Your hair is netted But for all my complaints, Shakespeare’s classic texts shall Your voice like gravel Your love for Polo (Ralph My sorrows and woes, no longer be taught in the class- O! how my heart is fretted Lauren) The ladies respect me room. Any reading or analytical And my nerves unravel. papers shall herein focus on Is, at times, concerning For the path that I chose. You adore the hockey men “Harry Potter and the Chamber Sweet Esther, like a flower, God, my loins are burning. Oh, Phillipian of Secrets.” More advanced you bloom in my view. courses can begin work on the You’re my fave! Monkey bread and orange much scarier “Harry Potter and You drive a beamer SUV soda? Okay, I’ll trust you. the Order of the Phoenix.” Hey, that’s pretty awesome. Sonnet 4,235 Anyone needing help on his But, Cass, if it were up to This is not a full sonnet Sonnet 49 or her Shakespeare related work me, For I’ve run out of space. Precious spring can come talk to me, and I’ll be You’d ride a wild possum. Thanks for reading my So tragically fleeting sure to point you in the right article It’s starting to sting direction. If your teacher does- Oh Cassie, you’re Though it was a disgrace. My head is bleeding. n’t believe what I have told you, Republican. kindly remind them that I liter- Hockey team on the ice It’s late at the Phillipian ally have Shakespeare in my Someone hit me today, uh-oh, you’re in love Everyone’s gone home. blood, and then proceed to slap In the head with a bat again! So now I’m stealing things them, Rick James style. I bleed when I pee And making prank calls on Speaking of Rick James, Imagine that? who remembers the episode of Sonnet 987 the phone. Proud Phillipian, “The A-Team” when the gang Spring is beautiful Mighty paper. -W.C.K. Vareika gets put in prison, and then Rick We all agree Monday night, again James comes and plays a con- But who would think cert for the inmates, and while These long hours I savor It would be so dangerous? he’s singing the A-Team escapes J. Yi/The Phillipian to freedom? I know I sure do. The Blues Brothers, Gabe Worgaftik Blues ’06 and Papa One fish, two fish Smurf Blues ’64, get ready to croon before going onstage. Red fish, blue fish.

Lines Not in a Shakespeare Play

on this pleasant eve of May? I pray her hand like a craven butterfly. soda. by Nate Scott thee, speak like the nimble fawn Make haste! FRIAR- Oh, you cunning FEATURES DUKE ORSINO who graces the earth with his sod- ACT 1, SCENE 2 In the vixen, always playing games with 10. Turn on the TV, Rosencrantz, I’m den hooves. Ryley Room my heart. Well, I must be off to Each week for The Phillipian DUKE- The truth is, good DUKE- I am off to find some fight the great evils that are the missing “Suddenly Susan.” it is my humble duty to pick a Friar and most esteemed Antonio, sweet delectabilities—perhaps my head editors of the Phillipian. I theme for the left page of that we have a Features section to good men Ben and Jerry will have leave my heart with thee. (Exits) week’s issue. I usually try to hone build together, and only we three a treat in store for me. (Exits) 9. Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? in on current events around cam- may be able to accomplish set ANTONIO- I am going to eat ACT 2, SCENE 1. In the pus (i.e. Features Takes Exams,) task. It will take us many hours, an entire hog. (Exits) Phillipian room Drinking again? I want a divorce. You or the time of year (i.e. Features and like God who built this earth FRIAR- Alas, I am now alone DUKE- I pray thee, how many Does Spring,) etc. Some themes in seven days, we have but three with my sweet Esther. Her beauty articles do we have to grace the take the kid. are better than others, and some hours to put together this post for radiates like the nuclear waste that pages of the sweet Phillipian with are just downright terrible ideas. the kinfolk of this academy. is stored underneath the old hock- this week? This week’s theme, to be perfectly ANTONIO- Methinks we ey rink. I must make speech with ANTONIO- I apologize kind 8. Othello, methinks it’s time for a honest, is a fantastic example of a should go to Ryley first. I crave her. sire, but the idea does not grace my terrible theme. Features Does Monkey Bread as Athena once ESTHER- Can I help you? befuddled mind. As you are well Devil-Dog! Shakespeare? It sounds like a craved the Ides of March…or FRIAR- Prithee, kind lady, aware, I am about as useful to the theme my mom would come up something. may I speak with thee? Your Phillipian as a dead mole rat. I will with. Oh well, I guess I’ll try my FRIAR- Quick, we must sweet, sensuous voice makes my now go massage the shoulders of best. I have written a move swiftly as the fox upon a sinews tremble and my nerves like Lady Gelb and eat food from the 7. Sorry about that, Horatio, but I can’t Shakespearean play that shows sprung hare! Alas, my sweet a swamp. Dost thou love me kind house of McDonald. I bid you control these busy hands. what it’s like to be a Features Esther will be there, for she is the Esther, like I have loved thee? adieu. (Exits) writer. Here it is. only one who can be my spring ESTHER- Try the monkey DUKE- Alas, it is you and me dove, as she holds my discourse in bread. It goes great with orange good Friar. Methinks you should LIST OF CHARACTERS do some work. 6. Oh no, Orlando, I think you deserve Duke Nathaniel (Played by FRIAR- Methinks you should yours truly) kiss my (TELEPHONE RINGS) the Daytime Emmy. Antonio (Played by Anthony DUKE- (Answering the Green ’05) phone-) Alas, it is good Sir Gabriel The Friar (Played by Christian the Mute! Hello, there Gabriel. 5. OMG, Desdemona, O...M...G. Vareika ’05) SIR GABE- … Sir Gabriel the Mute (Played DUKE- I know thou hates to by Gabe Worgaftik ’06) talk to us like thou hates the devil Esther (Played by herself) himself, but please—is your article 4. Iago, remember that movie, Aladdin? Hamlet (Played by Kenneth in? Branagh) SIR GABE- … Yeah, pretty sweet. DUKE- I pray thee, if your ACT 1, SCENE 1 In The article is done, just stay on the Phillipian Room phone. If you are not going to 3. Yo, Gertrude, how about a quick game DUKE- Oh holla, Antonio. write it, just hang up and leave me Thou bring’st the good Friar along to my own devices. of Halo? with thee? SIR GABE- (Click) ANTONIO- I have, good FRIAR- Too bad, I guess The patron. And like the setting sun of Phillipian will not run this week. I 2. C’mon Polonius, Pogs were SO much May, he enter’st here with me. am off to swoon over my dear FRIAR- A plague on both Esther. Good night to you, kind sir, cooler than Magic the Gathering. your houses! and flights of angels sing thee to DUKE- What? thy rest. (Exits) FRIAR- Sorry. I seem to have HAMLET- Get thee to a forgotten what was going on. But nunnery! 1. Seafaring men, sir. They say they have anyways, hello there kind Duke, B. Kaiser/The Phillipian letters for you. what news dost thou carry for me Nate Scott ’05 reads the soliloquy that made him famous, “The THE END speech upon the hill to thee that thou dost be.” THE PHILLIPIAN FEATURES May 14, 2004 B5

by Yoni Gruskin trouble I am able to avoid the stepping reality, until the official FEATURES GABSSA wrath of a DC with the excuse results of the all school lottery are “but I’m only a freshman.” announced, all freshmen boys are by Anthony Green Being a freshman is like being in planning how to decorate their FEATURES DENNIS HOPPER WANNABE Ever since I arrived at PA as a the utopian situation where four-room doubles in Bartlet and Junior in the entering class of nobody expects anything of you. Foxcroft. Lately certain things about 2003, I was told horror stories Point 2: Dances Point 5: Hey at least we’re about what it means to be a fresh- this school have been making me I am able to reap some of the not ’06… man. I have even heard that the furious. There are the obvious greatest benefits of being a fresh- …enough said! word freshman no longer means a ones, like the fact that I know a man at school dances. As a fresh- Point 6: Senior Active first year student, but rather a crack addict who gets more sleep man at dances I have a wide Probation derogatory term used as a euphe- than I do, and then there are the range of flexibility. I have per- Regardless of how often we mism for hazing. In an attempt to less obvious ones, like the fact fected the freshmen puppy face. insult the seniors, they can’t be different, stupid, and to go that if you wash your hands in The strategic use of this face touch us…that is, not without against conventional wisdom, I the Commons bathroom, you’ll invokes the guilty consciences of having their graduation ceremo- am going to dare to argue that smell like a hospital for the next attractive upperclass girls and ny by the mailbox. being a freshman is off the hizzle six years. I’ve been trying to leaves them no choice but to give Point 7: The privilege of (a term only freshmen are cool hold back for so long now, writ- in to my pleas and dance with me. being the best friend of Steven enough to say.) A relatively ing only upbeat articles about I dance with attractive older girls. DeSimone ’04. unknown dead man once pro- things I like, such as roast beef I like to think it’s because I’m We own the Freeman Room. claimed that ignorance is bliss. and the color magenta, but it’s irresistible. The reality is that it’s DeSimone lives in the Freeman History will one day hold my time I let out my frustration. I because I’m a freshman. As a Room. Make the connection. name high for establishing that either let my feelings out now, or freshman boy not only can I Point 8: The Meaning of “being a freshman is bliss” (it I pay 500 bucks an hour for that dance with attractive older girls, Life kind of has a nice ring to it.) As guy from Frasier to listen to my but I can also dance with fresh- As a freshman I can pretend my freshman year comes to a problems when I’m 40. man girls without being consid- to know the true meaning of the close, I look back on its great Complaint #1: Silence rules ered a pedophile. Verve Pipe song “Freshman.” benefits. that are enforced in the library. Point 3: Upper Spring… “…To think that we were wise Point 1: “It’s alright, I’m Let’s be honest: nobody really …Never heard of it and we’d never only a freshman” goes to the library to study. There Point 4: compromise…we were only I have come to realize that are some rare exceptions, like if College Counseling… freshmen.” I’ll be honest; I have this line ties together every you need one of those “books” …No need for it. Every no idea what any of that means. advantage there is to being a they have all over the place, or if freshman is making the tough Point 9: A future freshman. I use this line for all of your Microsoft Word doesn’t choice about whether they are I’m happier about my future the stupid and worthless things I work because you dripped taco going to Yale or Harvard. John today than I will be next year. do (and trust me there are many.) remnants all over your keyboard Kennedy once labeled himself an My mirror still lies. I follow every one of my stupid, (but if I had to make the choice “idealist without illusions.” Point 10: Rebellion “that’s just not funny” jokes with again, it was a delicious taco…) B. Kaiser/The Phillipian Freshmen are fools with all sorts Thomas Jefferson once pro- this line. Every time I get into Anyway, the library is an Sims “The Walrus” Witherspoon ’05 enforces a strict silence of illusions. Speaking of side- claimed that “a little rebellion is incredibly social place, and I policy on Anthony Green ’05 as he tries to read his novella. good.” I have far surpassed Mr. think that the librarians should Jefferson’s measure. As a fresh- recognize that; first by wearing your general direction. Also, you were wondering, I was just man I can still feed my “bad to bright magenta suits everywhere, every word in our language ends impersonating Andover. Why the bone” ego by staying up past and second by addressing every with the letters ‘ois’.” And what are the students here required to lights out. That’s right. You can student as either “Captain a proverb it is. take classes? If you ask me, find me online past 11 on week- Duckford” or “Raoul.” These Complaint #3: That show everything I needed to learn I nights and past one on weekend names really have nothing to do Fear Factor. I know it doesn’t learned from Davis, the salty old nights. As I get older (read with my suggestion, but I’d be in really relate to the school, but if I craps champion who lived out- Lower year) I will become more the library a whole lot more often see the commercials for one side of my house when I was and more conservative about if they called me Raoul there. more episode, I’m going to flip nine. He might not have had the breaking rules. What will I pos- Complaint #2: Those squir- out and attack Dennis Hopper. best hygiene, but he knew his sibly do next year when being up rels that make you think they’re Yeah, that’s right, the guy from stuff. In fact, if it weren’t for past 11? going to let you pet them, and Speed. Anyway, every time I see Davis, I never would have been In conclusion I have just then wuss out at the end. an ad for the show, I hear some- accepted to this school, since my summed up the 10 best reasons Seriously, every squirrel on this thing along these lines, “And on whole admissions process was a why, to quote a wise campus stands still and lets you the next episode of Fear Factor, $6,000 bet against the number man…again… “being a freshman walk within six inches of it, but we get a bunch of contestants to 31. Davis was really on fire that is bliss.” While I don’t necessar- when you try to touch it, then climb on something sort of high day. ily agree with everything or any- nnnnnnooooo, Mr. Squirrel isn’t with tons of safety ropes. Oh, Complaint #5: Baked scrod. thing I’ve just said, I’m proud to so crazy about the idea anymore, and then eat something people in Seriously, I just really hate baked say that I have fulfilled my 600- is he? I am reminded of an old foreign countries eat all the time scrod. 800 word requirement for this French proverb that goes a little and enjoy, but since all we have Well that’s all the complain- article. Any questions regarding something like this: “Parlevous on this show are unsophisticated ing I can fit in for my article. I what it means to be a helpless jansouis wis, ouis chois deltois jerks from North Dakota who have a lot more to talk about, but freshman boy or if you simply bois,” which translated into need to buy a new tractor, we I don’t think anyone cares about need a friend to talk to, please English means “You silly don’t have to worry about it.” how much time a week I spend direct all comments and ques- I’m sick of all these ads. Can’t I combing my leg hair besides me. Staff Photo/The Phillipian American. Why you try to touch tions to the teen hotline x6333 de squirrel? You and your fancy just watch Martha Stewart If you agree with any of my com- Yoni Gruskin ’07 strikes a pose while ruminating on his strik- jogging suits, I blow smoke in Living IN PEACE!?!? plaints, feel free to start a peti- ing resemblence to Albert Einstein. Complaint #4: Requirements. tion, as petitions have had a long Let me do a quick impression for and successful history here at you: “OOOOHHH, I’m Andover, Phillips Academy. Anyway, I’m I want kids to know how to do gonna’ go eat some chocolate things. OOOHHHH!!!” In case pudding out of the birdbath.

Have you ever been solicited by a bearded woman in Baltimore who offered you a back- rub and wanted to take you out for noodles?

between classes, people always in urbs. To any of those underclass- the main campus, and wake up by John Badman Because we haven’t. a rush with their heads down to men seeking a place where they lying next to cinder block walls. FEATURES BADMAN REALTORS CO. get somewhere, and the bustle of can walk around, breath fresh air, While many of the students in this Commons. During the weekend and have large rooms, this is the cluster become defensive over Approaching that time of the there is always nightlife, from place for them. People in these their housing situation, I see no Write For Features year when underclassmen decide gangs outside of the Ryley room clusters enjoy the benefits of not reason to be. This is a respectable where they want to live next year, like scenes out of Celebrities living near the heart of campus; place to live, as we all know some I thought that I would help stu- Uncensored, to sketchy characters there is less air pollution, noise, people are not as blessed in life. Esmerelda X6898 dents decide which cluster or holding paper bags while standing and best of all, there are larger And so, mentioning most of Marty the Magnificent X2688 dorms best fit their personality. underneath one of the many street dorms and dorm rooms. Also, if the clusters on campus, I leave it Right now I want you to think lamps. Most of the dorm rooms in we are talking real estate, the fact to the children of tomorrow to Captain Delicious X6942 about yourself, and who you real- these dorms are just like real that Isham Health Center is in this decide where they want to live. ly are, and then with my help, estate in major cities, with small cluster, providing fantastic health- match yourself with the correct rooms, and even smaller bath- care, the value of each room is location. rooms. Usually one can hear increased at least 10%. Students Prada, Gucci, Burberry, music coming from one of can enjoy lacrosse games, slip-n- Longchamp, and Louis Vuitton. Bartlet’s best rooms facing Sam slides, baseball, and Frisbee on Such are the labels overflowing in Phil; it is usually my dog DMX or the open quads. sophisticated American Cities like Eminem. This cluster is perfect Walking down the road New York, Boston, and Chicago. for the well-cultured, wild and towards CVS, students will come They also happen to be the crazy party animal. to know the cluster of Abbot. favorites among Flagstaff girls. Walking from the craziness of This is the country, with small Flagstaff, which includes the Flagstaff to the paths of WQS and dorms and large amounts of land high-rise dorms Foxcroft, Barlet, WQN, one starts to notice white between them. I don’t really and Paul Revere, can best be picket fences, birds chirping, know any dorms in this cluster, described as a metropolitan zone. freshly cut grass, and a small boy but that does not matter, because I The cluster is the heart of the cam- and his father playing baseball. can still stereotype. These stu- pus, with paths overflowing Yes, this is what we call the sub- dents are not that interested in the academics or sports, but rather farming and living off the land. Some of them never even leave their small dorms, but rather hunt woodland creatures and fish out of the sanctuary over in Pine Knoll cluster. If you want to live like a hermit and partake in very little socializing, Abbot cluster was made for you. Excuse me, I hear ’a knocking at the door. It was Snoop-d-o- double-gee! He had to go though cause he had gansgta business to attend in Bishop. As we all know, outside of most cities, where the start-up families live, there is always low- incoming housing. These housing complexes are usually one to two stories tall, have small balconies, and are in real-estate zones that are in inconvenient locations. To call Pine Knoll cluster this real estate zone would be unfair, and just plain cruel. So I will. Pine Knoll cluster is great for that stu- dent who wants to live in the C. Touhey/The Phillipian woods, look out over the beautiful N. Scott Learning that taking an unfunny photo for Features can have sanctuary, have a long walk into disastrous results is a lesson all of our writers must learn. B6 THE PHILLIPIAN SPORTS MAY 14, 2004 Boys Tennis Served 3 L’s By Milton, Choate, Exeter by Dan Wagman PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER through shirts like Seniors go As the end of the season nears, through water guns, but it wore the Andover Boys Tennis team them out quickly. In the regular played its three season when it counted, the big toughest oppo- blue wiped the smug smiles off of nents: Milton, Exeter’s faces and beat them 5-2. Choate, and This time, however, at Andover’s Exeter. home courts, it was a different out- BOYS TENNIS Unfortunately, come. they lost all three Andover won the match at to make their record heading into Exeter last time because they won interschols 4 wins and 6 losses. the crucial doubles point. This time It started on Friday when the though was a different story. interscholastic champions, Milton, Andover was caught off guard by traveled to the Andover courts. the changes in teams that Exeter Again this team looks to be one of made, putting one of their better the best in New England and they players at #3 doubles and putting showed their skill by handily beat- two solid players at #2. Both teams ing Andover in all three doubles ended up losing 8-4. matches. Their captain, and team The first match to finish was leader, is Ned Samuelson who is Michael Li. His opponent, the ranked in the top 20 players nation- Central Mass. Champion, came at wide. His strong play at #1 doubles Li with a different strategy this helped Milton take the early 1-0 time, forcing Li to hit out of his lead. comfort zone. This, doubled with a At #1 singles Michael Li ’06 recent groin injury, resulted in a 6- had to play Samuelson. Despite a 1, 6-2 loss. strong effort, Li was quickly dis- Andover came back though patched with 6-0, 6-0. The next with a strong win from Weigel at match to finish was Russel #4, 6-1, 6-2. Exeter then retaliated Dykema ’04 at #2 who also lost by with a win at #3 from Nick Day a somewhat large margin. who beat Wagman 6-3, 6-3. Andover, now down 3-0, turned to Wagman’s loss put pressure on the John Weigel ’05, Daniel Wagman remaining three matches of ’06, Adam Draper ’04, and Ben Dykema, Draper, and Grant. Grant ’05 to make a run and hope- Despite being down 3-1, their fully pull out the win. prospects were not too bad. When Unfortunately, the match was Dykema finally won at #2 against C. Touhey/The Phillipian called after Weigel lost a tough an arrogant Exeter player 6-3, 6-4, Hobe Boeschenstein ’04 tries to run past his Moses Brown defender during last Wednesday’s game. The Moses Brown defense match to a very bad sport at #4. the match got even more heated. held Andover at bay for most of the game, defeating the Big Blue 11-5. However, Wagman, Draper, and Andover and Exeter players alike Grant all had split sets and poten- started gathering around the two tially could have won making the courts of Draper and Grant, cheer- Boys Lax Picks up Huge Victories over Loomis, KUA, final score very close. This is a ing their teammates on. large improvement from their 7-0 With Grant having split sets loss last season. against a player he was previously All-American Goalie Stops Blue Against Moses Brown The following day Andover pulverized by, all eyes were on took the long trek to Choate. The Draper. After having lost the first by Vic Miller & Nate Kellogg while hard hits and stellar play strong team. Barron ’04 once and stopping shots between the three hour drive affected the boys, set 7-6 in a close tie-breaker and from Alex Bongiorni ’04 and again helped direct the offense pipes. In the end, Andover tri- PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITERS making them get off to a sluggish being down 5-4 in the second set, Mason Fried ’06 helped keep the with Coach John Dugan’s help, umphed, 11-4. start in the doubles. Throughout Draper made a run. By hitting red out of the crease. Goalkeepers generating looks and scoring This past Wednesday the Big Two Saturdays ago the Big the season, Andover has had trou- deep, heavy forehands, Draper Matt Smith ’04 and Paul opportunities. Hobie Blue played Rhode Island’s Moses bles winning the doubles point. brought the match to 5-5. In the Blue Boys Lacrosse team got up to Fenstermaker ’04 had huge games Boeschenstein ’04 played one of Brown. The first quarter was a play the game of This happened again on Saturday end, it came down to who was less between the pipes. In the end, his best games this year, playing hard fought dogfight by both and it put Andover in 1-0 deficit tired. Draper’s failure to move his the year against Andover’s brilliant play resulted in by the philosophy, “If you score, it teams. After the first 12 minutes of Loomis- early, affecting their confidence. opponent around the court resulted a big 9-8 win. doesn’t hurt.” Boeschenstein the game the score was knotted at This led to Andover getting in the Exeter opponent being more Chaffee, a tradi- The following Wednesday, the found himself being pummeled 3. The second quarter, the Big tional New- slaughtered in the singles matches. quick on his feet and able to steal boys played a developing again and again on the crease, tak- Blue’s defense was not able to Of course, Li won at #1 singles in the second set and the match 7-6, BOYS LACROSSE England power- Worcester Academy squad. ing hit after hit, but finding the keep up with Moses Brown’s house. a hotly contested match with a 7-5. Despite the loss, Draper’s Worcester’s boys could not stop twine four times for four goals. offense, allowing 5 goals while good retriever who hit every shot good play was noted by all. From the opening face off, one Andover’s quick offense, and they Matt Ward ’06, playing with an Andover’s offense was only able could easily see that the whole with intense topspin. In the third Eventually, with Exeter winning 4- could not penetrate the Big Blue’s injured shoulder, still managed to to generate 2 goals, leaving the set tie-breaker, Li was down 9-6 2, Grant’s match was called off. game would be physical and defense. Smith and Fenstermaker score 2 goals. Dave Wilkinson ’05 score at 8 Ð 5 in favor of Moses intense for both squads. Captain and on the verge of losing. Even though Andover had a helped produce a shutout as the and Sam Kennedy ‘05 also had Brown at the half. However, Li dug deep and won 11- tough week against Milton, Tom Barron ’04 helped direct the final score was 19 Ð 0, Andover. goals off of hard runs to the crease The second half proved to be a offense in creating and finishing 9 in the tie-breaker, using his Choate, and Exeter, they think they Noteworthy goals of the game with shots on the run. disaster for the Big Blue. Moses extensive match experience to will do well in Interschols this looks at the cage. Matt Ward ’06 came from Alex Bongiorni ’04, The defense, challenged by a Brown’s standout goalie played an utilized Barron’s direction, taking push him past his opponent. The weekend. The Andover Boys’ who scored his first goal ever, and physical K.U.A. attack in the tran- exceptional game, keeping them in final score with Choate was 6-1 in Tennis team is sure that whoever his man up top and driving to the Peter McCarthy ‘07 and Pat Curtin sition game, was still able to clear the game, and Andover out. The cage one on one. His ox-like build their favor. their first round opponent is, win ’07 generated 7 goals, scoring two the ball well and hold them to only final score was 11-5, Moses After the unfortunate loss vs. or lose, will not have an easy time. and strong shot was able to gener- and five, respectively. four goals. Harrold once again Brown. ate four goals for the team. Choate, Andover tried to redeem Feeding off of this win, the came into the spotlight with excel- Following this tough loss, the themselves last Wednesday against The defense, led by Cotton team headed to Kimball Union lent man defense and getting after team looks to rebound on Saturday Harrold ’04, ravaged the Pelicans’ their bitter rivals, Exeter. It was a SCOTT TRAVELS Academy in northern New the ground balls. Smith had anoth- against Choate Rosemary Hall in wind free day, but the 90 degree offense. Late slides extinguished Hampshire to play a surprisingly er great game directing the defense Wallingford, Connecticut. Loomis’ draw and dump offense weather not only made the boys go TO ENGLAND FOR PREMIER DEGREE Earns Elite Diploma

Coach Plans for Another Successful Soccer Season Continued from Page B1, Column 6 Education considers applications individually because there is limit- ed enrollment. Mr. Scott has been a member of the NSCAA for twenty-five years and has always desired to earn their highest diploma, but stated that his main motivation for getting the Premier diploma was to improve as a soccer coach and hopefully pro- vide the PA soccer players with a higher quality experience during Courtesy of Kate Ireland the fall season. When asked what was the most important thing he The Andover Girls Crew First boat sprinted to victories over St. Paul’s, Tabor, and Exeter over the past two weeks. PA’s varsity boats finished second to CRI, an got out of the training session, Mr. independant club rowing institute, but remain undefeated against their NEIRA opponents. Scott responded, “To have an inten- sive learning experience with fel- low coaches from around the states PA Girls Varsity Boats Remain Undefeated in League Competition, and to think about systems of play in an academic way is something that I had never really done before. Flying by St. Paul’s and Tabor, Slipping Past Exeter at the Finish The course challenged me to think by Catalina McCallum lead over both boats early on in Despite their resounding seats to both boats going the lead on both Exeter and about my coaching and the system PHILLIPIAN SPORTS WRITER the race and kept it until the end, victory, the start of Andover’s through the middle of the race. Tabor right from the start, the we use in ways that simply couldn't finishing at 4:55.1. Andover was race was a little scary for the By the end, St. Paul’s had taken Big Blue kept their lead deci- happen without the structure of a surprisingly close on their heels, crew. “It looked like everyone a considerable lead on the sively throughout the race, and program like the Premier course.” The Andover Girl’s Crew and took an impressive amount was really frantic,” said Andover crew, winning with a finished with another stellar After completion of the pro- team continued its successful of open water on St. Paul’s. coxswain Jess Fan ’05, “We time of 5:26.9, followed by CRI sprint at a time of 5:24.31. gram, Mr. Scott’s main plan for season with great Andover finished at 5:01.7, just were kind of unnerved by the and Andover at 5:35.9 and Exeter followed in 5:33.75 and improving the soccer team next races against St. six seconds behind CRI. “In the fact that CRI stayed with us for 5.39.7 respectively. Tabor came in third with year is to revise his player organi- Paul’s and the rowing world, coming within the first par of the race. Usually Last weekend, Andover 5:55.10. As Daigneault said, zation on the field. “We have Community six seconds of a club crew like we leave everyone behind in the raced Exeter and Tabor on its “G2 doesn’t worry about win- played a 4-4-2 system for years and Rowing Institute, that is pretty respectable,” said first twenty strokes, but they home course. As Daigneault ning, but by how much they can I think we will continue to play this and against Captain Jessie Daigneault ’04, held on to us.” The girls got it said, “The first boat race was possibly win by.” system with a few modifications. CREW Exeter and Tabor. “That was a good race to get us back though, and took a lead awesome.” Andover and Exeter G3 sadly gave up their race The course challenged me to think The two varsity boats remain back on track and ready for over CRI and left St. Paul’s well kept even through the first 500, to Exeter by just a few seconds. about adjustments that can be made undefeated in the league. G1 fell Exeter week.” St. Paul’s fin- in their wake. but Exeter took a lead going Exeter took a lead off the start in when the team is behind in the last only to CRI, a crew they will not ished well behind with a time of Marcella Viktorin ’05 said through the middle of the race. just the first five strokes, and twenty minutes of a game. We have face at Interschols, and the sec- 5:15.4. of the finish, “We’d worked Towards the last 500, Andover lengthened it through the first rarely trained with this in mind and ond boat has yet to be beaten, G2 was the only Andover hard on that sprint, and it walked up a little, and gained a 500. During the middle 500, I am eager to think about ways to but the third boat took losses in prepare the boys in practice for sit- girls boat to win their race, and showed in the race. We were lead on the sprint finish. “We Andover pulled up even to both of their races. uations like that,” explained Mr. it was an impressive win. “They moving fast.” Andover’s time just wrecked them,” said Exeter and took a lead of a seat St. Paul’s was the last boat Scott. are just unbelievably fast, and to was 5:06.9, followed by CRI Daigneault, “It was the best or two, before lowering their that Andover had to beat before Mr. Scott will put these new beat up on both CRI and SPS is (5:11.6) and St. Paul’s (5:19.5), sprint I’ve ever experienced; we ratings and giving the lead back. they had defeated ever boat they ideas into action next fall when he huge,” said Daigneault, “They G3 suffered their first loss of just totally walked on them.” Demoralized going into the final will face at Interschols, and the and the Andover Boys Varsity go out on the water and that’s it- the season against St. Paul’s and Andover won at 5:04.24, fol- 500, Andover tried unsuccess- first boat took a resounding vic- Soccer team, who finished 12-4-2 they are in race mode and CRI, giving up open water to the lowed by Exeter (5:05.78) and fully to pull it back in the sprint. tory. The race turned out to be a and reached the NEPSSA Final this there’s no touching them until St. Paul’s crew. Staying with St. Tabor (5:26.33). Exeter won with 5:43.3, fol- better piece than any the team past year, kickoff their 2004 sea- they are back off the water. Paul’s and CRI through the first The second boat outdid lowed by Andover (5:46.5) and had seen all week. CRI took a son. They just fly.” 500, Andover began to give up themselves in their race. Taking Tabor (6:10.2).