VOLUME 1, ISSUE 4

Dear Patty Not sure what to do this Halloween? See what Patty the Pilgrim has to say on the subject!

A Haunting in Vermont

Something wicked sits just East of us! Read about the haunted house in Vermont!

Green Scene Scare your friends with these horrifying facts about climate change! Patty’s Prophecies The horoscope you never knew you needed.

PHOTO BY: ALEXIS CALL MAGAZINE

Scare Your Friends This Halloween With These Horrifying Climate Crisis Facts!

Nevada Elkins

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s October 31st rolls around, fear turns (IPCC) report, stating that the 20 warmest into fun! All the freaky thrills you've years on record have occurred in the last kept hidden away for the past 364 22 years. This is an upward and long-term Adays come crawling back out. The unhealthy temperature trend. 2015, 2016, 2017,2018 and obsession with Reese’s Pieces, the horror movie 2019 had some of the highest temperatures binges, and the same devil costume you have since 1880. been wearing to college parties every year are Skeletons in your closet? The oceans got just dying to make their annual appearance! them, too. Except there is one horror, a bone- The ocean absorbs large quantities of chilling, hair-raising menace that will make an heat as a result of the increasing concentrations appearance this Halloween and the rest of the of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere, year . . . or maybe, if you are really unlucky, the mainly from fossil fuel consumption. The rest of your life. ocean is acting as a shield, protecting humans We're talking climate crisis, baby! from some of the more rapid changes in This Halloween, you can scare yourself climate. Without the ocean acting as a buffer, and your friends with these rattling facts about temperatures across the globe would already the deteriorating world around us! have risen much more than what we are Climate change is already happening currently seeing. However, ocean warming and its detrimental to human life. leads to deoxygenation, or a reduction in the Global climate change is occurring, amount of oxygen in the ocean. The increasing right now. The observable effects on the temperatures paired with ocean acidification, environment can be seen across the world. or the decrease in pH of the ocean due to an The ice sheets are ripping from their restraints, uptake of CO2, affects marine species and sea levels are rising, wildfires are blazing and underwater ecosystems. temperatures are increasing rapidly, both Coral reefs are one of the ecosystems above and below the waterline. Scientists that are particularly vulnerable to changes in are confident that global temperatures will sea temperatures. Mass coral bleaching events continue to rise for decades to come; a direct and infectious disease outbreaks among corals result of greenhouse gasses that are produced are already occurring. The consortiums of by human activities. The jumps in temperature color and biodiversity of the reefs are being will likely feed the more drastic effects of boiled into limestone skeletons; graveyards climate change, negatively impacting air replace ecosystems. quality and crop production, increasing the The worst impacts of climate change spread of infectious diseases, and threaten could be irreversible by 2030. freshwater deposits. The IPCC warned the public that It all comes full circle: humans created we are a ticking clock; we have ten years to the mess and now we are going to live with the prevent the worst impacts of climate change. consequences. We must cut our emissions in half to even The 20 hottest years on record have attempt to avert catastrophic impacts that been in the past 22 years. are bubbling over our boiling pot of a planet. The World Meteorological Organization Despite this fact, little has changed in regard (WMO) collected the research that was to our greenhouse gas emissions, and that is released in the 2018 United Nations terrifying. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change If you are not scared, you should be.

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A HAUNTING IN VERMONT

Mariah Olmstead

here’s a rumor that a man named At first I thought it was one of Perley Gordon hung himself in the my brothers, but quickly realized that house at the end of the street where none of them were that tall. I sat there in TI grew up. My street, named Perley Gordon disbelief, thinking I was dreaming as I Road, is named after him. scrambled for my flashlight. But as soon as it came, it disappeared. I woke one of my I grew up in a farmhouse that dated older brothers and told him, but he quickly back to the early 1900’s. It’s a big, old, explained it away as a dream and told me to wooden building, and when we first moved go back to bed. in, in 2002, I knew something was off. The house felt cold, the floorboards creaked, and Fast forward 4 years. I was in 5th I always felt like someone was following me. grade and my younger brother and I were I lived with my 3 brothers growing up, the upstairs in the “playroom," building with youngest being a year younger than me, the LEGO’s when we heard a loud sound. My second being three years older than me, and younger brother got up to investigate and my oldest brother being in high school. told me to follow him. We went over to look at the stack of boxes in the other room and For the first week we all slept in the whole thing had fallen over. But, here's the living room while we waited for our the weird part; the boxes weren’t that high, furniture to arrive, including our beds. I nor could they have easily fallen over. There remember the very first night we spent in was no wind and our other siblings weren’t our sleeping bags. I smushed between my home. The only other person who was there brothers on the floor when I suddenly woke was our mother, and she was in another part up. of the house.

What occurred next will always stick Scared, we ran downstairs and never with me; I saw, what looked like a shadow spoke of it again. figure, about 6 feet tall, wearing a brimmed hat. Around 2007, my two older brothers were up late watching movies in the family

4 Secatibe runtum earum sincilla velenimus auta nobit raecus di omniet MAGAZINE 5 MAGAZINE

room when they heard whispering. I guess I’ll never truly know if anyone was there, but I do know one thing: At first, they thought it was me or that house was and is haunted. Although my younger brother, but realized we were none of my family members were ever asleep and no one else was awake. This is really injured, we have seen apparitions when they both became believers. quite a few times and many things have been knocked over. My mother and father were less easily convinced. It took them until 2009 We’ve also heard noises like people to truly believe something was haunting talking when no one is home and felt a chill our house. Things would fall off shelves, on our backs at random times. Everyone in paintings or pictures would be straight my family knows our house is haunted and one day and crooked when they woke up although we know none of the spirits want the next. Numerous times my brothers, to hurt us, it still scares us whenever we talk mother, and I felt extremely cold whenever about it. we walked up the stairs. A few times, while walking into rooms, it would feel like we were being pushed, but no one was around.

For me, the scariest time, to this day, was on Christmas eve in 2004. I, like many kids, believed in Santa and was too excited to sleep. I remember putting my head under the blankets and letting my legs fall off of the end of the bed. I was about to fall asleep when I felt something pull my foot. I looked up from under the blankets, thinking it was one of my brothers playing a prank, but no one was there.

I remember saying, “Ok, you can come out now. I know it's you,” but no one answered. I was scared, so I stuck my head underneath the blankets a second time but felt as if someone was sitting on my legs. I yelled for it to stop and when I pulled the blanket off my head, I saw what looked like a puff of dark smoke dissipate in front of me. When I awoke the next morning, there were scratch marks on right where I felt something sitting.

6 DEAR PATTY,

Halloween has always been my favorite Holiday. But this year with everything that’s been going on, I’ve found it very difficult to get into the spirit of things. Usually, I would decorate, I would make an elaborate costume from scratch, I would be watching all the classic movies like Addams Family, and Addams Family Values, but my heart just hasn’t been in it this time around. Do you have any suggestions on how I can get into the spirit, despite the COVID complica- tions? -Hopeless Halloweener

ear Hopeless Halloweener, left town, one of his plants that done it. Thank you for reaching out Or maybe I’m thinking of Paul the older and seeking my expertise on man I met who owned a cactus farm on the D good side of Arizona in 1948. Yes we sat this very important matter. Pandemics can indeed be challenging times. for hours just drinking coffee, he told me of I remember the last one; of course we didn’t how his father had inherited the land and have no Halloween back then. No no our how it was always his dream to have the Halloween was World War 1 and I thank cactus farm. I never thought much of the the Sun God every day for those Morlocks idea, although he almost got me to invest helping us to defeat the Russians. But we in the farm. Yes we kept in touch, letters did have baseball. Shoeless Joe and the boys mostly, occasionally he’d send a polaroid of weren’t as bad as what these modern time his farm with the arms of the cacti pointing Astros have been up to. Many people still in all directions I believe I still have the tried to give out candy but nobody had any photo in one of my drawers, it really is teeth back then, that’s why so many of us such a mess. I’ve been meaning to clean were left handed. Yep during that pandemic it up for many years but you know I really I had to move to Iowa for several months think I like it better this way. Makes the and the winter was rough. I had a neighbor space feel more lived in. I read that book by the name of Billy Webster, nice fellow. about getting rid of things that don’t bring He used to tell me about the gardening he joy. Wasn’t for me. Every small piece of liked to do during the summer months. I scrap paper and knickknack gives me joy so didn’t stick around long when things started why would I toss it? Anyways I hoped that to melt in the spring time, but his stories answered your question. Make sure to Vote really helped me through that long winter. Qanon! I often think back on my time in Iowa on warm July afternoons and I wonder what Sincerely with the Utmost, kindest Regards, ol’ Billy is up to these days, dead I suppose. Matter fact I believe he was dead when I Patty “the” Pilgrim MAGAZINE Artwork By: ElkinsArtwork Nevada PATTY’S PROPHECIES

Predicted By: Max Weinberg

Aries (March 21-April 19) Today will be the day your Aunt Susan finally tries to restart your relationship after years of turmoil. Grudges will be important today, which is why it is crucial to remain stubborn and refuse to let her in. Remember she never returned your James Taylor cassette tape. If she isn’t at least willing to apologize it may come to fisticuffs. You hold the power, the stars have chosen today for this interaction because the clouds hold the weight.

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Taurus (Apri 20-May 20) to yourself and everyone around you. You will feel worried probably. Gemini (May 21-June 20) Libra (September 23-October 22) Things have not been going well for you Jim, for It is possible you may feel tired today, but don’t quite some it has been the time to flip to the B worry it doesn’t necessarily mean you hate all side of your life. You aren’t paranoid everyone Polish people. in your life is indeed out to get you. While you Scorpio (October 23-November 21) sleep your wife plots against you. That barista really does hate you. Of course you have the If your name is Hubert, Jessica or Akmed you proof but none of the sheep will believe you. He will die today. Make major life decisions, live like got your order wrong 5 months ago, but has he there’s no tomorrow. Take out a large insurance apologized? Exactly. Illuminati. Boom. Place policy. importance on the number 7 ½ and the man Sagittarius (November 22-December 21) in the Orange Ford Focus who lives down the Today will be the day Jesus returns. Or not. I’m street. not really sure. Cancer (June 21-July 22) Capricorn (December 22-January 19) It may feel like people are dying and trying to Your wife Linda will leave you for the man hide themselves from you with masks. Don’t who works at subway. It is very important to worry it’s all in your head. begin selling assets so you can purchase part of Leo (July 23-August 22) a Quiznos franchise with your cousin who is Jealousy will consume you, much like that time recently deceased. Dead people can still buy fast in the 4th grade in Mr. Whistler’s class when food franchises in New Mexico, and it’s the only Gregory got his first choice of construction paper way to show your wife what she missed out on. If colors. Patience is wise, as is time for reflection. your social security number is 106-00-0113 it is The zen way to handle this is to show up at especially important to convince your neighbor Gregory’s house after 40 years and confront him to enter a multi-level marketing scheme with angrily. He has been living a lie and he wants you. All of your hats were worn by somebody to leave his wife and kids to be with you, you else while you were sleeping. Make sure to invent just need to show him a way forward to a life New Brunswick sauce before the idea is stolen with you. Loud voices will help soothe the way from you by the IRS. End transmission. for love to enter your hearts. Bring pills and Aquarius (January 20-Febrary 18) construction paper. If it is raining where you are, you are in fact Virgo (August 23-September 22) inside the Matrix. Call Tommy in 6 days for When you walk outside you may feel cooler further instruction. breezes and hear the rustling of leaves. This is a Pisces (February 19-March 20) sure sign you have lost your mind, have yourself See Taurus. institutionalized immediately. You are a danger

9 MAGAZINE REVIEW OF NETFLIX'S HUBIE HALLOWEEN Nasjir Patterson Alexxis Vautour-Link

ith Halloween around the Ben Stiller even makes an appearance in corner, it's always right to sit the very beginning of the movie. Although and watch Halloween movies he's in the movie for a short period of time, Wwith some family or a group of friends. he's the one that sets the tone. There's so many to choose from: horror There is also a handful of popular movies like Insidious, Nightmare on Disney stars like China Anne McClain, Elm Street, Friday the 13th, or a classic Peyton List, Bradley Steven Perry, and like Halloween. You could also watch a Karan Brar. Karan Brar appears more than comedy like Scary Movie, A Haunted the rest and seems to be the ring leader of House, or Hocus Pocus. the pranks they pull on Hubie. That is until In Hubie Halloween, Hubie Dubois his character, Deli Mike Mundi, is taken by (Adam Sandler), who seems to be the the mysterious creature from a cornfield. center of attention for mean pranks and Even Stranger Things star, Noah jokes, needs to keep the town safe on Schnapp, makes an appearance. He's the Halloween night. It's something he's always typical 9th grade boy trying to impress liked to do, except this year is different. A the upperclassman mean girl. He is cast as strange creature is on the loose and it's up the adopted son of Violet Valentine (Julie to Hubie to save the community. Bowen), who just so happens to be the love The film takes place in Salem, of Hubie's life. Massachusetts. I have never been there Some other notable appearances in myself and growing up I didn't go to many the film are Sandler's wife, Jackie Sandler, haunted trails or attractions, however, as well as their two daughters, Sadie and this movie gave me a slight idea of what Sunny Sandler. There's one moment in the being in Salem on Halloween is like. The film to keep an eye out for where Sunny decorations in the movie are very over- and Adam connect. He's giving trick-or- the-top; if you love Halloween, prepare treating advice during lunch time and he to be amazed by Hubie's front lawn. It's compliments her. Since they are actually filled with pumpkins, fake tomb stones and family in real life, it was definitely an "aww" different monsters and creatures! moment. Like any other Adam Sandler movie Overall, the cast was pretty great. you've watched, there's an assortment of There are plenty of jokes and even some great actors/actresses. This movie features easter eggs too! If you happen to come a ton of familiar faces, including the across Hubie Halloween on Netflix, you usual crew: Kevin James, Steve Buscemi, should definitely give it a watch! Rob Schneider, Maya Rudolph, and Tim Meadows. Anytime these people are cast in films together, there's a guaranteed laugh.

10 Alexis Call

Alexis Call 11 MAGAZINE Nasjir Patterson Nasjir MAGAZINE 12

Photo courtesy of: Rachel Senechal MAGAZINE DO NOT TRY TO BUY COOKIE DOUGH IN HENNIKER UNLESS YOU ARE READY TO BE UNEQUIVICABLY DISAPPOINTED Lia Mulqueen

hen I set out on my journey, I wasn’t lime tortilla chips when the thought struck me even thinking of cookie dough. “What if I got some of those little circle sugar cookies that have the seasonal stamps on them W I was going to the Pharmacy to pick like pumpkins or ghosts?” up a wide-toothed comb and some cotton pads. It was drizzling out, just barely, so I was You know the ones I mean. wearing my yellow rain jacket and my Teva sandals, because I figured “Sure, wet feet are By the time the concept of these cookies uncomfortable, but mildly wet feet are only even enters a person’s mind, there is a turning mildly uncomfortable,” I went to the pharmacy point. A moment when you realize there is no and found that they didn’t have the wide-tooth going back. comb or cotton pads, and it was only then that I decided to hike across town to the Dollar My new mission had almost nothing General. to do with the wide-toothed comb; my new mission was to get that cookie dough and to You must understand that it is at this promptly return to Union where I would make very early point in the story that I am signing the whole package and eat them all without any up to walk across town, knowing full well that help. the sidewalks will disappear as I get further from Main Street and I will have to walk Alas, there was no cookie dough to be through the mud in my Tevas both there and found at the Dollar General. back. All these thoughts are running through my head as I’m standing in the Pharmacy, but at Nothing. Not even a tub of Nestle a certain point, one’s desire to possess a wide- Tollhouse dough. But I was not defeated yet. tooth comb and cotton pads outweighs their I formulated a new plan. I would simply skip desire to keep their feet dry. the pretzels and the tortilla chips, purchase the cotton pads and the comb, then go across the I didn’t decide that I needed cookie road to the Harvester Market where surely there dough until I got to the Dollar General and will be cookie dough and where I would also be realized that it might be a good time to get able to do my food shopping. some food shopping done. I started walking around, picking out some cheesy pretzels and However, when I went to the Harvester

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Market, with my basket already full of lime tortilla chips and pretzels and cans of soup, I For the second time in one day, I realized that still there was absolutely no cookie entered the pharmacy, and for the second time dough to be found. Shamefully, I asked myself in one day, I was disappointed. There was only “Why am I even here, then, if there is no cookie one place left to turn; College Convenience. dough,” and with a low hanging head I returned My feet were muddy and brown, my soul worn all my groceries to their shelves and exited the and tattered from the rain and the walking store without purchasing anything. and the lack of little, perfectly circular, precut sugar cookies with stamps on them, but I still On my way back to the heart of town, I had hope. I still believed CoCo’s would pull realized that I don’t even own a cookie sheet, so through. as far as my actual plan for baking the cookies is concerned, I am at a loss, but frankly, I didn’t And I was wrong. care. I was driven by the intense craving to shove hot, melty sugar discs into my angry little CoCo’s, just like every place I checked, mouth and have them disintegrate into liquid did not have any cookie dough in stock. happiness of my tongue. Now, not only do I not have cookie “Perhaps,” I thought “the Pharmacy will dough, but I also do not have lime-flavored have some...” sure, they didn’t have any wide- tortilla chips or pretzels. I do, however, have a tooth combs, but I don’t see why they wouldn’t wide-tooth comb so, at the end of the day, I may have cookie dough. Then again, I couldn’t not have gotten what I wanted...but I got what I see why the Dollar General or the Harvester needed, and that is all that really matters. Market wouldn’t have cookie dough either.

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Photo courtesy of: Rachel Senechal MAGAZINE WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE HALLOWEEN COSTUME AS A CHILD?

hen I was eight to ten years old I was really into zombies and Wzombie lore and zombie movies, so of course, when I was nine I wanted to be a zombie for Halloween. My mom and I went all out on this costume with fake gashes and torn up clothes and spooky makeup, I felt truly scary, which is why this is my favorite. -Lia Mulqueen

y costume was a bumblebee. It’s my favorite because it Mwas one of the last times I trick or treated with my family. It’s a memory that’s close to my heart. -Lilli McCormack

16 ’m an elephant and I knew how much it made my mom Ihappy because it’s her favorite animal. -Sam Weekley

n 2010 my brother dressed up as "me" and I dressed up as my brother. The funny part is that I Iwas never a cheerleader, and he just decided that was what he was going to go with. I wore his shoulder pads and pants and I thought I was super cool because of it. -Sydni Geisler MAGAZINE Andrew Dow Andrew

Rissa Marino

Rachel Senechal

18 Nasjir Patterson

Rachel Senechal Want to be involved in The NewEnglander? Email [email protected] to get started!