The Best of the Decade
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— inner The best How our lives changed since The Vinyl Opinion - “Root the decade’s start Hog or Die” More mothers are by Andrew Turman Mojo uses this song as an several of their albums in of the (mothers With children Guest Writer opportunity to launch a the past. Surprisingly, they under age 18) The latest disc of tabloid well-deserved attack on the capture quite accurately the spoofs and advocacy of anti FCC. In another song, rural, middle-American high m ... '' 65%' j social behavior by Mojo "Chicken Drop," Mojo takes school experience. I 1 52.9% Nixon and sideman Skid a jab at another group of challenge anyone whose decade \ ^ ..m Then A Roper is called Root Hog moral guardians. Tipper ever gone to a high school or Die. Mojo’s simple 50’s Gore’s PMRC football game not to say, Mrs. Gore, however, might "yes, that just the way they the nation Is aging (median age) rock ‘n’ roll riffs combine with Skid’s washboard be more inclined to take were." Then | 30.0 years Hottest percussion to provide the offense at the songs In the end, this album is a Now 32.7 years perfect backdrop for Mojo’s "Louisiana Liplock" and welcome relief from the "She’s Vibrator Dependant." monotony of top 40, and Fewer of us are married humorous half-sung, half- screamed vocals. I’ll leave it to you to figure the self-importance and Then 61 6% I products of The album starts off with out what these songs are seriousness adopted by Now 56 9% the sure-to-be-classic about; suffice to say that much of todays "college" "Debbie Gibson Is Pregnant the latter song deals with music. So set your troubles We’re getting married later the 1980’s With My Two-Headed Love the ultimate in man being and your morals aside and Men Women Child." This song carries replaced by machine. take a listen. popular tabloid journalism One might wonder what 25,9 j The Blue Banner’s Top Ten i to its illogical extreme. In it Woody Guthrie would think News Events of the Eighties J 22.1 we find Tiffany and Debbie about Mojo’s cover of "This by James Cox ‘.••.V 1 G. Jello wrestling, though Land is Your Land," though USA 'I'odav/Apnle Collcoe Network 11',.‘II 1 1 1. Lady Di and Prince Mojo is careful to refute it is actually more in the Charles wedding. You didn’t have to wait until the ’80s any rumors involving spirit of the original than to equip your den with a personal More children are born ... but fewer are born devitalized covers by such out of wedlock. to teens Debbie Gibson and Spuds 2. The 1981 release of the computer, your kitchen with a groups as Peter, Paul and McKenzie. For those with hostages in Iran. microwave oven and your garage with MTV, there is also an Mary. I don’t think, a minivan. Most consumers, though, 1 extremely interesting video however, that Woody ever 3. The murder of John Then 1 did wait. for the song. envisioned anything about Lennon. The people who ignored Tandy and The second track, "(619) "Mojoworld," the Commodore PCs in the ’70s tried More-complete high school';; 239-KING," is sort of an amusement park of the 4. The fall of the Berlin desktop publishing with an IBM PC or Th -ti advertisement for an actual future, in his song. ‘Nuff Wall. Apple Macintosh in the ’80s. The said? hotline Mojo set up, where 5. The assassination Volkswagen "microbus" they people could call and report "Circus Mystery" is remembered from the ’60s was attempt on Ronald ... and more go to college aftorgradualion ::: their Elvis sightings. probably the most musically Reagan’s life. reincarnated as the minivan. The Th‘ ; Unfortunately, this song is complex piece ever microwave that cooked unevenly and not as clever or original as recorded by Mojo and Skid. wouldn’t brown meat in the ’70s 6. The Challenger Mojo’s most famous song, It is also unusual for them explosion. became a lifesaver for working parents "Elvis is Everywhere," the in its lyrical surrealism. in the ’80s. Frequent-flier club- memberships 2t mdiiort Elvis motif having since "Legalize It" is an a 7. The AIDS epidemic. The decade’s hottest products (1989) been exploited by such capella song about the weren’t exactly new. And, except for other humorous songwriters perceived advantages to be the microwave and the PC, most 8. The student revolt in as Frank Zappa and Ray gained by the legalization of offered incremental improvement, The fax (machines) of life Tiananmen Square. Stevens. drugs. rather than wholesale change, in your 2.7 million 45,000 I.......................) "Pirate Radio" is about a The final song on the quality of life. 9. The nuclear disaster of ship that recently anchored album is "High School In marketing terms, the ’80s were the Chernobyl. Then Now Then Now off the coast of New York Football Friday Night." This decade of the line extension, City and commenced song is of a vein that Mojo particularly at the grocery store, where 10. The Exxon oil spill. unlicensed broadcasting. packaged food was reformulated in The rise of car phones... and Skid have included on "light" or "classic" varieties, fortified ~1 Then , 25,000 ................... with oat bran, calcium ” even fish oil. 475,600 y The decade’s hits; • Personal computers. After Apple .. and per^nal computers ' introduced the user-friendly Macintosh .. Then 329,400 .. in 1984, even computer loathers .;::Now, ; 6.65 million started to come around. PCs proved The decree^ iri smok^ incredibly versatile -- useful at home iAdult smokers Teen smokers or the office, for secretaries, CEOs and farmers. In 1979, there were 33.5% 329,000 personal computers in use. 28,8% 1 This year there are 6.6 million. 22% • Super-premium vodkas. Vodka' Then ‘ A f Then iWII boomed while the rest of the spirits industry went bust. The credit goes to LISTS OF A DECADE Sweden’s Absolut brand, which created Biggest cities the notion of upscale vodka with Then ■||NowV:i.::::;-v catchy, colorful ads. Soon, other vodka 1. New'York......... 1. New York makers - such as Stolichnaya -- rushed 2. Chicago :*i',;:2.:LpsAngeles, ■ Jv: - miur Used Books out with super-premiums of their own. '.■ilil... '3."LdsArigeles " 3. Chicago • Running shoes. You were strange if :';u-l:|i:-4|;:Ph.iiadeipiiiiii |y'4;yHoustoh;.'.:;.'S For 5. Houston 5. Philadelphia u you jogged in the ’70s, but you were 6. Detroit i:|.;6.ySan.Diego another face in the crowd if you tried 7. Dallas 7. Detroit l % 7 it in the ’80s. Along the way, the 8. San Diego *8iUDa l|a S::-K:f brand-name athletic-shoe business 9. Phoenix 9. San Antonio C'' :?:. imi became a $9 billion-a-year industiy' 10. Baltimore : >10. Phoenix and sold consumers on the notion that Five.tb^seliihg cars : We’d like to put more jingle in your pocket and more . sneakers were for everybody. Even if Then NOW spring in your step by paying you the most money pmjsible for you only run to the mailbox, you 1. Chevrolet Impala 1. Ford Taurus your used textbooks. We’re here Monday through Friday Z Oldsmobtie Cutlass Supreme |:2;;;iQri:,EsPpjj; • I. for your convenience. probably wear them. 3. Chevrolet Chevetle 3. Chevrolet Corsica • Microwave ovens. Consumers are 4. Chevrolet Matto 4 Honda Accord Bring your books to our new location and give us a try. getting zap-happy. They purchased 3.6 5. Ford Fairmont 5. Chevrolet CayaNer million microwave ovens in 1980, 11 Five top prime-time TV shows Avp- million last year. TTie momentum to then Where: Boy Scout Center buy the high-tech ovens was created 1. Laverne and Shirley 1. Bill Cosby Sho w when Stouffer and others developed 2. Three’s Company Z. Hoseanne 3. Happy Days 3. A Different World remarkably tasty single-serving dishes 4. Mork and Mindy -4. Chee/s just for the microwave. Until then, the 5. Angie 5. 60 Minutes'^ appliance had been relegated to When: All throughout exam warming leftovers. Most popular children's names: . 1979 : 1988 week. 9-6 daily • Fax machines. At $2,000 to $5,000 Boys .Girls . Boys Girls apiece, fax machines were thought too 1. Michael Jennifer 1. Michael Ashley UNCA pricey in the early ’80s. That thinking 2. Jason ■' : Melissa 2. Matthew Amanda changed as prices fell - now the I 3. Christopher Jessica 3. Christopher Jessica average is between $900 and $1,000. 4. Matthew Nicole 4. Andrew ■:Nicpfe,s>;.>;.'-'.':. ' 5. David The fax boom has begotten; 3.4 Amanda 5. Joshua Sarah 6. John Heather i 6. David Why: BECAUSE WE PAY MORE million fax machines in the United • 7, James Amy 7. Daniel Lauren States; 6,300 public "fax stations;" 4,000 ;;;8..>Rober1i||| Kelly 8. Robert Brittany hotel fax machines. You can send a 9. Joseph L1 9. John Samantha page in about a minute for the price 10. Brian Michelle ylil 6,■ Justin';:- m*.-.: Stephanie of a phone call. NASA even faxed Sourefc'USA too AtreaeSrett bV;>: ...... iM'ir-. .mil ......... Bob Lalftii'Gan'noii News'Se/y!co instructions to a space shuttle. aoozi: BT7V Paying you the most for your used books. The Blue Banner will return Jan. 25. Happy holidays!.