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Answer 070109 Good News for Today’s Businessman • Looking for re recoverycovery afteafterr divodivorce?rce? p.2 • OOverwhelmedverwhelmed by healthhealth proproblems?blems? p.5 • WhenWhen is coincidence coincidence sometsomethinghing more? more ? p.8 • AArere you haulhauling ing freight freight or failure? fai lure? p.11 THE CHUCK SHEGDA STORY Orlando, Florida USA t was the day after Christmas several Then I put my vulgar mouth to good years ago, and one that will live forever use, calling her every profane name in the Iin my memory. That’s when my wife of book. Instead of blowing up, she reacted 20 years announced she was leaving me. calmly. She was focused on leaving, making “Over the years, we’ve grown apart,” it clear she had been planning this move she told me. “It started when our oldest for some time. son left home for college. Ever since then, That’s what hurt the most, knowing we’ve been drifting. I’ve had enough.” she opened Christmas presents the day “What do you mean, grown apart?” I before and pretended we were still a happy said. “You mean you’re just going to chuck couple. 20 years down the drain? What about the I had no clue anything was wrong. We kids?” hadn’t been arguing. She hadn’t ever “That was the only thing keeping us threatened to leave. She just walked out, together,” she said. “But they’re older now. leaving me feeling like I had been kicked in They’ll be fine.” the gut. “Fine!” I screamed. “Like they’re just Naturally I reacted, my moods supposed to forget their mother walked swinging from tears and regret to anger out on the family? What do you mean, and yelling. Our then-18-year-old son— fine?” the oldest of our three children—helped 2 calm me down soon after she left. been for two friends, Roger and Dick. “Dad, you’ve got to think about what They were best of friends, having been you’re saying and doing,” he said after one best man in each other’s weddings. About 10 outburst. “I know it hurts, but we’re going to years older than me, Roger in particular was get through this.” like a shining light at a time when I I doubted that statement, especially desperately needed one. when she filed for divorce. It was a costly duel The night my wife walked out, I called that included a custody battle over our him about 11 p.m. Although he lives 45 youngest son. minutes away, he said, “I’m on my way.” We The expenses were bad enough, but in spent most of the night talking, even though the meantime I had to grapple with battered we both had to work the next day. self-esteem. Over the next two months, as I got to My parents are still married after more know Roger better, his life became incredibly than 55 years. My only brother has been with attractive. Calm, witty and controlled. his wife for more than Whenever we spent time 25 years. What was together, I walked away wrong with me? I felt feeling better. ashamed and One day I asked, embarrassed. I had no clue “Where does this all Intense soul come from? Why are searching forced me to you able to make it admit my wife’s leaving anything was through life even wasn’t a one-sided though it hasn’t been event. Our marriage perfect?” had flopped because of wrong “I’ve had a my failures, too. relationship with Jesus I never showed my wife much attention Christ since I was eight years old,” he replied. or gave her much time. We rarely did things “What I’ve found out was my problems didn’t together, never taking family vacations or disappear. Everything hasn’t been rosy. But spending time together socially. A hard- I’ve had somebody in my life Who will never working businessman, when I got home after leave me. He’s my anchor.” a long day I often took a nap and watched Less than two months after my wife some TV before falling into bed again. walked out, I saw that I needed the kind of Ironically, before this I thought I was a peace that Roger displayed. pretty good guy. After a crazy period of One day, sitting in a tiny restaurant—in partying in college, I didn’t drink or do drugs. the middle of eating a sandwich—I asked if I I had worked for more than 20 years in the could receive Christ. I didn’t know exactly computer service industry. And though my what that meant or what I was asking for, but playing days were over, I came from an I knew I wanted Him in my life. athletic background. My wife and I met when “Lord, my life isn’t what I want it to be,” I agreed to coach her women’s softball team. I said when we prayed. “I’m a sinner, and I Despite our oldest son’s calming want Jesus Christ in my heart and in my life. I influence, I wouldn’t have made it if it hadn’t want Your gift of grace, to be accepted by You, 3 and to have a relationship with You.” more than 1,000 miles apart, as our When we finished, I felt an incredible relationship blossomed, we established peace. The weight I had been carrying around telephone contact. Then she flew to Florida like a 500-pound gorilla lifted off my and ultimately agreed to move here. shoulders. Her presence in my life is proof that God Next, Roger talked to me about baptism, provides for every need I have. If you’re a ceremony where you go into water to struggling today because of a loss or a symbolize your old life being buried and problem, don’t give up. Don’t settle for a starting new with Christ. joyless life of self-pity and bitterness. Make “Can we do it right now?” I asked. the decision to follow Jesus. He is all you need “Sure,” he said. Hopping into his car, we and more. drove over to his church. The pastor was there and prayed with us. Then we got into its baptismal pool and Roger baptized me. I soon recognized that the God I thought had neglected me and turned His back on me during this painful period had never stopped loving me. This awareness filled me with a joy that has stayed with me ever since. God brought four other men into my life to help me follow Christ. They mentored me, encouraged me, and held me accountable for my actions. Without their influence, I might have fallen by the wayside. We called one guy “Sarge” because he had been a Marine drill instructor for 14 years. Sarge played an important role in my life right before my divorce was finalized in 2006. The court hearing was so close that I rationalized it would be all right to ask an attractive woman for a date. “First of all, you’re not divorced so that’s Chuck Shegda is a Call Qualifier for not happening,” he said. “You’re not quitting. Compucom, one of the nation’s It’s like you’ve run a marathon and you’re 50 yards from the finish line. And you’re going to largest providers of computer and quit? You’re not. If I have to carry you over mechanical services for major retail the finish line, I will.” chains and other stores. He and his The following year I appreciated his wife, Mona, have five children. They guidance even more. I never asked that attend Journey Christian Church woman out because God had someone else in and are involved in ministries to mind for me. needy and homeless persons. My second wife and I met through a Christian dating web site. Although we lived 4 THE ANTHONY RABAK STORY • Grass Valley, California USA alking into the room, my doctors continue operating the automotive detailing wore serious expressions. They service I began in my mid-20s. Wwere doing their best to take a The next months brought more clinical approach as the lead doctor delivered struggle. I never imagined being unable to results from my tests. I eagerly awaited the work and carry my own weight, especially news. after overcoming a series of health problems. Finally I would learn what was wrong. I faced the inevitable though, the day I I'd know why a funny tingling and numbness polished a car with a high-speed buffer. I had spread through my body a few nights could feel myself losing control of it. earlier. It’s horrible climbing out of bed and “Hold on!” I thought to myself. But, no collapsing on the floor. Especially, when you matter how hard I tried, my hands did the don’t know why. opposite of what my brain told them. The “You have a textbook case of multiple polisher slipped from my grasp. sclerosis. You should consider going on drug “Screech!” I watched in dismay as the treatment to slow down progression.” buffer danced across the hood, scratching After researching potential side effects, I freshly-shined paint and tumbled to the floor. decided against that for the time being. My “This is it,” I said, as reality set in, “my whole life had been plagued with side effects. business is over! Now what? What am I going I didn’t want to risk more.
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