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Bamnboozled! the Rape of a How Jessica Curtain Lied and Swindled MSA for Money Young Man’S

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Bamnboozled! the Rape of a How Jessica Curtain Lied and Swindled MSA for Money Young Man’S THE MICHIGANNow in TECHNICOLOR! REVIEW Volume 19, Number 6 The Campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan November 8 - 22, 2000 BAMNboozled! The Rape of a How Jessica Curtain Lied and Swindled MSA for Money Young Man’s BY MATTHEW S. SCHWARTZ Matt Nolan, an opponent. Both Mind, Sign ICHIGAN STUDENT assured Assembly members that the Assembly representative BY ADAM DANCY M Jessica Curtin, who was events during the ultimately responsible for scheduling the week would be NN ARBOR IS a tricky place activities of "Affirmative Action 102," bipartisan in nature. to live. After a mere two deliberately lied to the Assembly at its Oct. MSA voted to months as a resident here, my 3 meeting in order to acquire an extra allocate $3,000 each A concept of reality has been severely skewed. $3,000 to engender student support for toward bringing in This is a place where it appears that Ralph racial preferences. Her attempt failed, but two noted speakers: Nader has a decent various activities have come to light that Jesse Jackson in chance of being elected call into question whether she ever defense of racial president; where intended AA102 to be a balanced preferences, and J. Pratt/Review Contrary to popular belief, BAMN members do not fundamentalism of any examination of affirmative action. Ward Connerly in actually live out on the Diag, it just seems like they do. kind has been beaten, On Sept. 26, MSA approved spending opposition. flogged, and left to die; over $11,000 to fund "AA102," a week Connerly, chairman where all views are intended to spark debate over the use of of the American Civil Rights Institute, and preferences in California. accepted, and diversity is racial preferences in admissions. The former regent of the University of Connerly charges $10,000 per debate the battle cry. Actually, original motion proposing AA102 was co- California, chaired the California Civil appearance, so more money was needed. in my first two months here, the word sponsored by Curtin, a proponent of racial Rights Initiative that helped pass See BAMNboozled on Page 7 diversity has been thrown in my face and preferences, and Communications Chair Proposition 209, ending all forms of racial shoved down my throat by the administration, and political student groups, especially, and most vocally, the Diag Surrenders, MSA Elections Back Coalition to Defend Affirmative Action by Any Means Necessary (BAMN). However, BY MICHAEL AUSTIN AND GINA Independents have joined the race. The this group has yet to demonstrate that they FRATERNALI main parties are the incumbent Blue Party, have any concept of the meaning of this the newly founded Michigan Party, and the word. ICK OF NEVER knowing what is Defend Affirmative Action Party (DAAP). Just a few short weeks ago, the Peace going on at school? Each has party has its own platform and and Justice Commission of the Michigan Feel like no one is there to help the goals for the future of MSA. Student Assembly (MSA) and BAMN S sponsored the ten day-long Affirmative students? If you fall into this category, or However, all has not been smooth thus if you are just sick of the way things are far. Some controversy erupted the day Action 102 program, designed to inform run at this school, then it is time for you before the deadline to sign with a party. and convince students of the benefits of to do something. On November 15th and As the ballot clearly indicates, the Michigan affirmative action. It was extravagant: Jesse 16th, the Michigan Student Assembly Party is running only 7 candidates for the Jackson showed up and everything. This (MSA) elections will be held. This is your 8 open in LSA. The reason for this is a last all wrapped up the afternoon of Thursday, chance to make some changes. minute switch by sophomore MSA-LSA October 19th, with the Day of Action rally There are 21 open seats this term: 8 candidate Jessica Cash. After initially and march through the Diag. in LSA, 3 in both Engineering and committing herself to the Michigan Party, The program was hailed as a Rackham, 2 in Business, and 1 each for she told them she would not be running celebration of diversity. It was a sham. Dentistry, Medicine, Music, Nursing, and with them, and then committed herself to J. Wilson/Review Social Work. Michigan Party Chairman, Doug Tietz See RAPE on Page 3 In order to capture these seats, three See MSA on Page 8 parties have been formed and 9 hopeful First three copies free,additional copies 50 cents. www.michiganreview.com Stealing is Illegal and a sin (Exodus 20:15) Serpents Tooth From El Señor Guípe 2 4 Suite One 5-6 Columns 10 Features 11 and then some Matt and Jake got on 60 Min- More about AA102 (well Jim DOESNT write about After a year off, we have El Señor Guípe and La utes and helped Ed Bradley stop reporting on it if they guns, but rather about music reviews again, but Señorita Margarita are back. rip the administration a new stop making news about it) kickball. Mike goes after that does not mean wine And no, I dont think either one. Meanwhile, BAMN just and our MSA endorsements. communism. Unlike the reviews will be back. of them are remotely His- beats up a freshman. Lets hope history is on our Daily, our columnists actu- panic. side once more. ally hate communism. Page 2 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW SERPENTS TOOTH November 8, 2000 SERPENTS TOOTH THE MICHIGAN REVIEW Robert DeNiro recently gave Hillary same homeless people earlier that day, but Clinton a kiss during her 53rd birthday didn’t have enough weed left for them. The Campus Affairs Journal of the bash/fund raiser. One can only hope that University of Michigan the real world is somewhat like DeNiro's “Well I’m all broken up about that man’s rights.” movies, in which Hillary will be "whacked" Last Friday saw yet another marijuana James Y. Yeh later. rally on our fair Diag, with drug Editor-in-Chief paraphernalia freely passed around. Wow, a blind man. good thing it was only joints and bongs, A 20-year old man from New James Justin Wilson Russia has announced that it plans to because you know if it was a rally to lower Publisher, Managing Editor dump the Mir space station into the Pacific the drinking age and underage drinkers Bloomfield, Missouri was charged with ocean this Febuary. As part of the ongoing were drinking, DPS would’ve broken out endangering the welfare of children after Michael D. Austin push for cooperation in space exploration, the tear gas and fire hoses before you can he handed out condoms and sealed syringes Managing Editor the descent will be controlled by US say “beer buzz.” to trick-or-treaters. What, no live ammo Senator Ted Kennedy with assistance from and blasting caps? Matthew Franczak former Russian president Boris Yeltsin. National Affairs Editor Russian police stormed the R. Colin Painter headquarters of the Smirnoff vodka Matt, before Senior Editor The Russian Parliment recently distillers last weekend, fighting off bottle- surgery considered a bill to establish a "Voice of throwing employees. Meanwhile, cops that D.C. Lee Russia" radio station to ensure the survival were actually old enough to drink opted Campus Affairs Editor of freedom and democracy in the United for the easy way out and just went to the ASSISTANT EDITORS: Ruben Duran States. Moscow has been without an official bar instead. Gina Fraternali American mouthpiece since the fall of Brad Sprecher Communism, as its former network, NPR, FEATURES EDITOR: Kurt Rademacher SATIRE EDITOR: David Guipe remains loyal to the old government The little town of Virgin, Utah has COPY EDITOR: Michael Veeser enacted a new ordinence that would require ONLINE EDITOR: Rabeh Soofi a gun and ammunition in each household MUSIC EDITOR: John Pratt The Post Office is soliciting offers to for self defense. Hmm, that’s one way to LAYOUT: Carl Grant supply 800,000 computers, printers and keep Jehovah’s Witnesses away, isn’t it? STAFF WRITERS: Margaret Allen, Dan Honig, internet access for their employees, because Branden Muhl, Ryan Serra you know, ammunition is much cheaper Jake, before Columbia Law School EDITOR-AT-LARGE: M. Scott Schwartz when you buy it online. It appears that the house that Elian EDITORS EMERITI: Lee Bockhorn Gonzalez lived in during his stay in the Benjamin Kepple Congratulations to Matt and Jake for United States has been bought by members The Michigan Review is the independent, student-run journal A member of the Islamic Jihad recently of his Miami family and will be turned into their role in 60 Minutes’ story on the of conservative and libertarian opinion at the University of lawsuits against the University. Matt got Michigan. We neither solicit nor accept monetary donations rode a bike loaded with explosives toward a shrine. Just two days later, those that from the U–M. Contributions to the Michigan Review are tax- an Israeli outpost before he was stopped played the street number of the house in some good screen time, while Jake kinda deductible under Section 501 (c)(3) of the Internal Revenue got shafted. And kudos to Ed Bradley for Code. The Review is not affiliated with any political party or and killed. A suicidal bomber on a bike? the Floriday lottery each won $5000 university political group. Man, those high fuel prices must be hitting dollars. In a related story, crowds formed ripping into the administration like he did. “Well what if it’s a really good essay? Can Unsigned editorials represent the opinion of the editorial everyone..
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