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NSK 19 cord "The tie that binds since 1926" VOLUME XXXVI • ISSUE TWENTY FIVE • WEDNESDAY, MARCH 6,1996

WLU Student Publications

Programs to be prioritized

- however, insti- SABRINA SACCOCCIO of students enrolled. the budget cuts any

tution business Cord News A proposal for the allocation of or

submitted the The Executive of the Strategic priorities will be to going through

last Committee tough times will Planning Committee proposed Strategic Planning the before mid-April. inevitably suf- week that the programs in of Faculty ofArts and Science be divid- Ron Grimes, professor fer. has "If this ed into "first priority" and "second Religion and Culture, begun a the The priority" classifications. petition to protest proposal. proposal "first" and is Protests to this motion have sur- two-tiered system of imple-

faced because the plan would desig- "second" priority programs will be ment-

morale of it nate half of Laurier's departmental devastating to the stu- ed,

These dents, staff, and he said. will be programs as "secondary." faculty,

would lose full and "It's like some of done tactful- programs part- starving your would children that the others Read stated. time faculty, or collaborate so can stay ly," said. will with departments in other post-sec- alive," Grimes "You just can't No student be ondary institutions. do that." prevented Grimes that the Under the new plan, first priority proposed budget from continuing

from losses be distributed to the entire in in programs would be protected a program

of at WLU. the middle of ? significant long-term budget cuts. scope programs

The Executive Committee members Weakening some units of the system degree;

who devised the plan believe that will only put stress on the

those as a whole, he certain programs, especially University's viability

traditionally specific to WLU, declared.

the Laurier's deserve protection from declining For past five years,

support. academic departments have equally

Arthur Read, Dean of Arts and shared a lack of government fund-

Science and Chair of the Executive ing. However, these cuts have been

Committee, stressed that this pro- minimal: 1-3% per year - in com-

posal is still in the planning stage. parison to 1996/97, where funds instead,

substantial will be slashed 6%. Before any change by special mea-

v each academic "Cuts this are to sures will be occurs, department huge going v

at WLU has been asked to complete affect the flagship programs at devised. Moreover,

Read the Read said. "Some said WLU will be of a questionnaire. hopes WLU," programs Read, one who will the responses should determine which with limited enrollment may have to the universities in Ontario proposal.

from and show departments are most in need of bear the brunt a little more." fare best in the face of the budget "Who would want a degree Students faculty can

resources, howpopular specific pro- Read said the designers of the cuts. a university in which half of the their support by signing petitions

available in the and Culture grams are, the degree of their tradi- proposal realize that morale at the Grimes, however, urged all stu- departments were publicly stigma- Religion

tional tized second heasked. Offices. curriculum, and the number University would be lost in light of dents, staff, and faculty to vote down as priority?" Department

Trying to cope with paralysis

A Laurier student offers some insight into his daily struggle

BILL GOFF new insight and I would like to describe the hope with which this kick in the head. chair than I am hanging on to this

Cord opinion share with of the This another seems to some you. inspires me. One main rea- brings me to yet planet. "Sitting" imply

Three and half I sort of comfort choice. a years ago, was Although my immediate reaction sons I am writing this article is in misunderstanding. "Rehabilitation" some or

involved in accident is sort sound little dra- car which to criticize the problems I now hopes of raising this of aware- has become an empty word for peo- "Confined" may a

resulted in and the need remind but beleive it be much my paralysis, experience, I to myself ness. ple to use when talking about some- matic I to a

loss of a best friend. There that also do The were no not so long ago I was Before the accident I would have thing they not understand. more accurate description. Paralysis

drugs, alcohol, or other vehicles of these difficulties. This disabilities of kind is and any unaware chosen death over paralysis, but notion that any an indescribably complete involved. 1 do not article is for when with the Although remem- not meant as a plea something like this actually will somehow be all right personal injury. ber the accident unofficial is it meant absurd. Since the I have also myself, sympathy, nor to place happens, you can amaze yourself by proper rehabilitation is accident,

recorded the blame wish to offer hos- that older police reports car or guilt, I simply doing things that you never thought While in rehab at a spinal cord noticed people (especially

a hill, end treat has cresting flipping over end, some insight into my new perspec- you were capable of. More recently, pital in Toronto, the purpose of my people) me as if my injury and six times into a ditch. tive. of life not affected motor frictions rolling acceptance what has happened stay was to learn howto live in a only my The driver (more of also an acquain- One of the most obvious miscon- has become more of an issue. I have wheelchair. There is no dealing with but has rendered me an idiot.

tance than a friend at the time who know of the ceptions some people seem to have been told many time that this accep- life in a wheelchair, coping is what I For those of you the

accident) thrown clear and and is failure Bricker she won't let was a to recognize me as an tance is supposed to be the first part do everyday in this chair. It gets no cleaning lady, broke his friend actual winter arm, my was person, separate from my of the process that everybody goes easier, and the pain never goes me leave the building in the

caught in the sunroof and killed chair. As be without out- easily as someone may through. My opinion of this process away. telling me how cold it is

instantly, and I was thrown into a described to as tall, short, black or closely mirrors the respect I have for The loss I have experienced is side and how I ought put on a tree. white, I have become scarf. "nice" to simply a 'per- the people in the pyschological reinforced every day when I am She is even enough

Since there were no other vehi- in true done son a wheelchair'. This is a aspect of my 'rehabilitation'. able to see how simple life used to make sure my jacket is up

cles involved, and since I can't but enough statement, it is this Throughout my stay in hospital, be in everyone around me. Again, I tight. the remember accident, the of situation which the most here specific acceptance my pyschologists kept reinforcing the do not wish any sympathy, but For part, people of the cause accident is unknown. to It idea that would be makes want to have weD. seems perpetuate my problem any feelings per- sometimes it me treated me exceptionally This means the driver not can be seems as if beleive I and all hear the In about I people that am fectly 'average', they were scream when I of all just every regard, really charged with offense (he is with and I any content my situation, simply too quick to point out all the prob- pathetic apathy and self pity going enjoy the school environment

presently applying to be a police offi- forward to better wheel- lems I around feel that I fit in. looking a was experiencing. Essentially, on me. am happy to Maybe cer). Having now life I the I'll experienced chair. Although realize a cure or I was told how perfectly I fit into the There is also the general notion sometime in future pass you both in and of out a wheelchair, I of kind "road to that wheelchair. street won't improvement any may be a step by step recovery" I am "sitting" in my on the and you even feel I have some gained decade I can not - I notice. Thatwould be cool. important or more away, process about as comforting as a am no more sitting in my wheel- really Building I

Literacy in the Community 1 (_ej-j-er>

March 19 & 20 • 9 - 4 am pm Beside Freedom of Speech. (Or drop books off in the Cord office.)

it's thai time of the year again

TURRET in the have alot store for you

Lettermait's/ t( Women's Soccer

Tickets are available at the Centre Spot

Usual GREAT time,

I Sf| Pc«tricic's Day Party NEWS

"Fireside chat" with new WLUSU

President and Vice President

"I'm there's Both and dis- WLUSU. experience will get the new mem- very happy, though a lot Lynn Raptis were

to be done in about the 31% voter turn "We have seventeen weeks until bers up to speed." of work my depart- appointed

to three "The ment," he said. out, on February 26, although both we ask the board approve a Raptis agreed. returning

he is to hold several stated that to other uni- million dollar company," Lynn said. BOD members are very strong," Raptis planning compared

- the of "Scott [McCormick, President of said. "And those from the FYC Student Awareness Campaigns. "I versities percentage voters

wanted have was President-Elect Joel Lynn WLUSU] and I have started the those guys have been great. It will to many campaigns," high.

"but I have been Week had an transition so that when the current be nice to have some fresh perspec- he laughed, "Perhaps Reading

to effect it the MELANIE SEAL administration leaves, we will be tives. With fresh faces come fresh advised focus on smaller things on it, perhaps was co-op

to ideas." the committee work all ballots. We need to take these fac- Cord News caught upand ready go." can on year. taken I'd like focus sexual into consideration next new also With the Health Plan to on aware- tors year." Only recently elected, the Raptis said he is working on being Joel and is the full time staff and orientation; and I'd said. WLUSU President, Lynn, a smooth transition. Hiring on over by a member, ness, safety, Lynn the Ontario have multicultural Vice President: University Affairs top of his list - he plans to "focus on and problems within like to an actual Alliance fair, where from various cul- (VP:UA), George Raptis, have setting up the department and hir- Universities Student things don't jumped into action. ing motivated people to have a good (OUSA), the responsibilities of the tures are sold. I want to spend

- I'd like to 'Tuition cuts and CFS [Canadian year." VP:UA are changing. So too is the a lot of money see an

students between VPand increase in there's Federation of Students] ripping Laurier may be con- relationship the the sponsorship so a

to these down doors is making for an inter- cerned because the new Board of President. decreased cost students for

Directors is made of "It is a for the to events." esting university atmosphere," Lynn up many new year president asked about his in commented. "There will be a new members, several of whom are spend at home, for internal restruc- When position

their fresh from "The VP:UA of Ezra Street change in how students see First Year Council (FYC). turing," Lynn declared. the event an Party ID,

the two executives aren't will in an external set- said, "We're together a money spent. It's an interesting time But wor- participate Lynn putting will to be President." ried. ting; OUSA is becoming increasingly year-end celebration. It be con-

believe trolled. is Lynn said his immediate plans "I it's a good group," important. I want to play an initial If there a street party, of commented. "There's role the of OUSA I there will be affiliation with are to get the new Board Lynn some in steering as no a

Directors and Operations excellent experience bringing lead- have the experience." Laurier student. The year end cele-

those from the bration should detract from Management Board "up to speed" ership, and there are Raptis also sees the upcoming any VP:SA-Elect George Raptis

- also. event of Ezra III." on the budget and operations within FYC an excellent group The year as a potential time for changes. New department created

Arthur Stephen named Vice President: University Advancement

LORI DYSIEVICK As Vice President: University Laurier's future." functions together, ensuring that began his career at the University in

Cord and the news Advancement, Stephen's duties will Marsden said she hoped that the these functions are coordinated 1974 in Office of the Registrar.

In to held the of response new challenges include responsibility for all aspects creation of the position of Vice will complement one another. He has also positions

the administration of ofAdmissions and Director posed to WLU, external relations for the univer- President: University Advancement In his previous position as Director

has reorganized. As a result of this sity - development (fundraising), by the WLU Board of Governors Assistant Vice President: University of Institutional Relations.

Arthur has reorganization, Stephen, for- student recruitment, alumni affairs, would help with the new tasks of Relations, Stephen was responsible Stephen received many

mer Assistant Vice President: and public affairs. budget cuts, increased competition for public affairs, publications, stu- awards for his work in the field of

has been "The the and alumni He has University Relations, creation of new post for high-calibre students, and easy dent recruitment, university advancement.

Vice President: has and and appointed University no budgetary implications," said transitions for new executives as affairs. Development fundrais- extensive writing editorial expe-

Advancement. The of of and the first Canadian new position Lorna Marsden, President Wilfrid senior positions become open. The ing became a part the position's rience, was

created deal with the Laurier. "The Board the Stuben Award was to of Governors new position will also allow the Vice responsibilities in late 1995. to receive Apple

Laurier will face in the next created the of from the Council for changes position as a way to face President: University Advancement A graduate WLU with an American decade. Advancementin 1994. the enormous challenges in to oversee all external relations Honours degree in History, Stephen University

Students build houses in New Orleans

it CONNIE HAWKINS HFH bought the land and tore ging very thick "gumbo mud," as

nicknamed the Cord News down the slums that were there. was by site supervi-

doesn't land Archie. also remarked While some people vegged out in Although HFH buy in sor, They

front of the TV, or relaxed in a the best neighbourhoods, in the that it was a different experience to

students of the street is work the New Orleans houses. sunny climate, 20 WLU case New Orleans, on

- built houses in New Orleans, now one of the safest in the area. Canadian houses have basements

Louisiana. The Instead of sold but New Orleans is below students were part drugs being on the sea level,

Habitat the doesn't of for Humanity's Collegiate street, children play freely on the so digging go as deep.

Challenge. frontlawns. Perhaps the best experience was

Habitat for The level vol- of the home Humanity (HFH) pro- of experience for meeting one owners.

oth- - Home 500 vides housing for families who unteers was not important many owners perform hours of

erwise would not be able to afford hadnever been on site before, while volunteer work - so-called "sweat

it. It depends on personal and cor- some had participated in past equity" - on houses before they can

porate donations, volunteer labour, Collegiate Challenges. get their own home. This is often

and "sweat in the of the home a revolving loan fund, They performed tasks such as difficult, as case

New equity" from homeowners in its pro- digging holes for sewer lines, and owner working in Orleans,

jects and "blitz builds." building sills for the houses to sit on. because she also "works 50-60hour

The Laurier students volun- Several students also had the weeks." When the Canadian stu-

teered their time and labour to dents told her where their opportunity work with power they were the PICTURE for Collegiate Challenge, which tools, but these jobs were "stressful" from, she was clearly moved. All brings university students and on the muscles and the inexperi- she could say was "That's beauti-

homeowners builds. FILE together on enced user. ful."

The New Orleans will students worked the project Most agreed that the The group through

houses fall and the include as many as ten on experience was well worthwhile, winter to raise $3,000 to Students out Habitat for help by digging foundations. street. difficult tasks for the Humanity one even for such as dig- pay trip.

theCord March 6, 1996 3 (News)

Cord evaluation of WLUSP

ing about an in camera revenue for Student Publications, downs. are to create do. Their liaison to meeting, They planning they the Cord TOM HRUBES, KATHY CAWSEY, and that issue resolved effi- she taken action the became ill was could have sooner. two new positions within corpo- seriously at the beginning SCOTT STINSON and Sue has contin- As well, more should have ration that will transform of the her ciently quietly action help year, forcing to leave her Cord News Commentary ued to the of been taken raise the of WLUSP into We oversee transformation to profile an autonomous organi- duties. shouldn't have to depend This evaluation look completes our WLUSP into a distinct from Student Publications in the student zation. Another has been on between entity pet project relationships Cord and at the who have been elected the people Students' Union. - next StudentPublications' WLUSP executives for body years executive was raising profile, communica- to represent interests in stu- include the work which led such tion! your Accomplishments completely acclaimed, so to initiatives as an dent The government. Student of an needs to be done this On more negotiation advertising agree- in area. alumni fund-raising campaign. a positive note, David

Publications Board of Directors is ment with the Athletic Sue has been effective in the fact that all for Janzen deserves Department very Again, positions applause for sacri-

responsible for managing the Cord, and the addition of Student team acclaimed his Christmas building a atmosphere in the next year's board were ficing holidays for the the Keystone yearbook, the WLUer Publications' office, but work needs advertising agreement needs to improve her indicates that a lot more always grueling and boring dayplanner, and the Cord (usually) into the official to her foot down and take to be in this area. The Canadian Press University Policy. ability put accomplished University conven- Guide. Both are firsts for a decisive the important copo- action. slowness of the board to react to tion. Shayne Lidkea and Steve

ration to ensure financial in revenue was Groenveld deserve working drop advertising credit as the Sue Bany, President stability. Board of Directors (Karen Bula, also disappointing. board members who spend the term in office has been Barry's However, Sue shares responsibil- Steve Groenveld, David Janzen, While the lack of interest in the most time around the office, while marked by its The for the low revenue Laurie has been Laurie peacefulness. ity advertising Legault, and Shayne board's activities a run- Legault gets a nod for tack-

only was the at the of the Since ad controversy resigna- beginning year. Lidkea) ning joke at the Cord, the fact ling the low revenue problem

tion of a board member for is the speak- advertising main source of This years board had both ups and remains most of us don'tknow what head on.

for over 200 nity students to see

what other residence staff were doing.

seminar Other seminar topics included Gambling sexual harassment, religion, alco-

hol, on-campus events, and

Western's submission on how to

improve studying.

"It was pretty competitive," said

hooks who award for with Dons Marshall's Hague, agreed

comment: "It's nice to see Laurier's

name on the plaque instead of

Western's," which has won several ROBIN WHITTAKER teer dons with intentions of remain- other one's to activities, ability stop The topic, said Hague, "hadn't times in recent years.

Cord News dons next their ing year, presented gambling, abnormal or unexplained been covered before, but at the According to Laurier's Student For the first time in the 16 his- seminar entitled and need "Gambling ... constant was year absenteeism, a same time it educational." Life Coordinator Fran Wdowczyk, tory of the Ontario Association of Don'tLet It Ride." for money. It was the first time that a semi- the dons thought the conference and College University Housing "It's an issue that hasn't been "Its on the rise it's becom- [and] nar on gambling had been present- was a worthwhile experience. Officers' Residence Life conference, dealt with, [but it's] to the more and of ed the conference. "I think lot moving ing more a problem," at we got a of bang for Laurier staff s residence team mem- forefront," team member Trevor said don Boukaert Mary Majewski. "[Gambling problems are] some- our buck," said Wdowczyk. The

bers won the prestigious Juiianne Hague remarked. "No one talks about it." aren't used ever thing people to hearing conference cost $70.00 per partici- Award. Pettigrew The award is The team's seminar included a The team members noted Bricker don were quick about," Dave pant, and the university picked up to the whose seminar skit how given group showing gambling esca- to acknowledge this "uniqueness" Bart, who hopes that schools will half the tab. exhibits research, and lates uniqueness, in residences, a mock was an factor in that important winning recognize gambling does go on Bart said the conference provid- overall educational value. Jeopardy game, and the and the which included 24 in residences. signs competition, ed an opportunity to meet people at the of that Meeting University across symptoms accompany gam- universities Ontario and The team members stressed from other schools and to "compare

Windsor 2nd to 4th, this These February bling. include a stu- well a and and signs , as as team repre- gambling is a financial a social analyze" different residence team, made of 11 volun- dents years up time spent gambling versus BACCHUS Canada. senting drain, since students blow their systems.

and don't He money on gambling also pointed out that it was a

it on school books chance for the spending or dons to get away in"° social activities. from residence for a weekend. "I don't think '° [Laurier's gam- Laurier's team will now present

bling problem] is anywhere near at OACUHO's Conference for eußQpef what Windsor has, obviously," Housing and Residence Life, held in remarked Majewski, commenting Ottawa May 26-29. Their audience

further that is will EXCLUSIVELY gambling "more of a be Ontario's chief housing offi- SUMMER ARE AVAILABLE a ftt -[HE BEST DEALS THIS CAMPUS. problem in male residences than in cers. TRAVEL CUIS/VOYAQES 0 „ FROM female residences." The presentation will be "a little

Gambling opportunities include more polished," said Majewski.

's Oh and the research? hockey pools, final-four, yes,

1,1 lottery tickets, poker games, charity Said Majewski, "We did hit the J casinos, pro-line, and casual bet- casino for primary documents."

With the about ting. group losing

"People like the idea of that big $40.00 at the Windsor Casino, she

win," said Majewski. said, "You're not really surprised The conference was an opportu- howpeople get into it."

Student . Ont.riKitional Whafs (SIC thfOW in Around U Up Campus Identity Cord)- W0 0(1(1 }*"" m m

Wednesday March 6 Sunday March 10

• 6 pm, Tforret; Mexican Funfest eel- *3 Recital Hall: Flute ensemble, travel pm, IHE BASICS from Essentials PURCHASE the ehrating SBE's 30th Anniversary. Admission free.

$2 $5 and • hosts a 13, students, faculty stafil 6 pm, Huret: Italian Club Campus by April CIHS/Voyages March |qC Thursday 7 Lasagna Dinner $7 members, $9

inHHE • we'll throw 10 am, Career Services: non-members 1996*. end "Getting b„cKpacK value MlsoN Started ...first the • # year (m job" 7 pm. Recital Hall: Clarinet

• }R ee! culs/VOYAaES 12 pm. Women's Centre: Speaker: Ensemble. Admission free, „ IRAVEL Mohlne Athia, the Resource Monday March 11 and breakfast Development Coordinator for the Career Services: night Oncludina •2:30 pm, PLUS on. free CAMPUS DAYPACK, YWCA Interview Skills Workshop

a March 8 • 8 Recital Hall: Maria PINK PALACE, the Pick up detailed brochure from. Friday pm. TTppett V jSfc dinner) at THE • 8 P1027: Arctic am, One-day conference speaks on "Photographing locat- I RAVEL CUTS youth resort for social workers. worldsid'* laraestlargest y community $10 Canada," Admission free. t #VOWGES CAMPUS for students. Tuesday March 12 student Union Building * Greece. • 7:30 IkLfclli ed in Corfu, pm. Rm 103 at 202 Regina: *10 am, Career Services: Job '5 University Avenue West Burton MacDonald lectures on Search Workshop 886-822K "Texts, Toponyms and Trash." • Noon, Recital Hall: Penderecki

available wdite last and may older offer Offer supplies Admission free. free. Not valid in conjunction wild any Admission * Certain restrictions may apply String Quartet British Columbia purchase not necessary in at any time Insurance •8 be discontinued Recital Hall: Percussion • Services: Career pm, 2:30 pm, Career ensemble. Admission free. Focus Workshop

4 March 6, 1996 theCord —(News) This year's WLUSP faces

not sales due to continued knowledge deal with our growing indepen- I'm a team player, but I'm of Student Publications as a source

make decision If of and professionalism. This will dence from the Union. The finance afraid to a either. news and information for the

want to do the will be of in secure the advertising dollar and department and the advertising you somebody job, Laurier community use

of - I'm Most in will ultimately help solve our cash department will receive a lot and do it right your guy. Enuff many ways. specifically,

the said.... that there is voice on flow problems. attention next year, as they are making sure a

the board the Finally, I hope to increase two departments that are going fighting for groups

of and who Publications' role within the Laurier through the mostamount change. organizations are not

short, next will the elite" of community. Through an increase in In year require a among "powerful

to Wilfrid Laurier volunteers. Publications will contin- lot of hard work in order prepare University.

for total within the ue to grow and prosper. our autonomy

nextfew 11l be around. years.

President Board of Directors

Laurie Legaut

Student Publications has been autonomous for the last three years,

become financial- yet it has failedto recorded last Beth Costelec ly secure. We a profit

and will this our No available. year likely year, yet platform cash flow problems have not been solved. Although an operations agreement has not yet been Jennifer Claike renewed, our was to be finan-

last and this is name's Don't cially secure by year Shayne Lidkea Ryan Lock Hi, my Jennifer Clarke.

President of be the is much what I would ensure as deceived, person

Student Publications. As Student Publications continues its Okay, does anybody actually read more unique than the name. As a

these? If I'm afraid I don't have Director-elect Stability can be accomplished by quest for autonomy, I plan to bring so, for WLUSP, I feel for-

and to that's to tunate to work and contribute to doing three things: knowledge, dedication, continu- anything say going pre-

have board. hold- serious such As WLUSP Publications must a plan for ity to next year's From sent a challenge to the status a great team.

future. I will create this at Student Publications. to the As president ing a position on year's board, I quo They're restructures serve the student

will have the and I a comprehensive five-year plan that have learned a lot and already on right track, all body more efficiently, promoting its

the ideas to to next to them the will stabilize and ensure growth some good bring can offer is help stay Domenico Magisano presence on campus will be impor-

will will of the corporation. This provide year's board. I work with the course for 1996/97. tant. Not enough people know that all that line a framework for incoming presi- board to continue our movement We know the bottom Hello, I'm Domenico Magisano, an WLUSP is much more than a few

which work and intend that Political student offices dents in to towards becoming completely is profit, I to ensure Honours Science at behind the 24 lounge, and is

the autonomous from the Student Publications to will to be for Second, advertising depart- Student's continues Laurier. I not profess an easily approachable any ques- ment is our main cash flow vehicle. Union. show one. Various steps have experienced member of the journal- tions, concerns and contributions. I

I Every year we have varying rev- Specifically, plan to help devel- already been taken moving Student ism community. But I do believe that would like to help raise this aware-

is the that have been Pubs closer towards from I be service to the that records enues, causing instability. My plan op new positions autonomy can of you, reader, ness of a corporation hire who to an Advertising Manager created as a result of the start of the the Students' Union, but clearly as a Board of Director of Student the rewards of being starving uni- is therefore of the there's still Publications. believe that long-term, increasing restructuring corporation to some way to go. I my image versity students.

Erratic

driving Bag

©para: WED. MARCH 6, 1996

(3 H ® S a : WED. MARCH 13,1996

PICK UP ELECTION PACKAGES AT THE

OFFICE OF THE UNIVERSITY

SECRETARY AT - P2094

Suspicious Person Several of these individuals were

1720 hrs Mon 26 Feb 96 served with Possession ofNarcotics Voting takes place on: As a WLU female faculty member and charged with carrying liquor her Wed. March 20 10:00 to 4:00 and 8:00 to 9:00 was walking to parked car in in an open container.

parking lot #3, an unknown male Thurs. March 21 10:00 to 4:00 and 8:00 to 9:00

her and approached began to ver- Dangerous Driving & Highway Fri. March 22 10:00 to 2:30 bally harass her. The male made Traffic Act Offences the remark: "I'm Stations will be located in the Concourse and the Science threatening going The duty officer stopped a WLU Polling Building to get you." The faculty member student who had been driving his

began to scream and the male ran vehicle in an erratic manner in off. The incident is under investiga- parking lot #3. A short investiga- tion. tion revealed that the licence plates Can Vour Swim? on the vehicle were not authorized "Guys" False fiie Alarm for that vehicle. The incident is

0152 hrs F«il Mar 96 under investigation. Officers responded to a call from

the head resident of little House Trespass Learn more about your own "swimmers" and help residence who reported that a fire iOGS hrs Sun 5 Mar 96 infertile couples too. alarm his was ring&ig in building. The duty officer removed two non- A check / 40% of infertile conducted and ft was WLU students from the C¥ } Approximately couples cannot achieue was gym ofthe 112 \ / found that the fire alarm m W \ pregnancy because the male is infertile. was false AC. Neither individual had a valid C~^)y§g\^

and had been activated I Donor insemination by some membership Both were giues these couples a chance to pass. —Z# J unknown fire \v y / haue children. person® pulng the served with trespass notices and M, alarm station on the 3rd floor "A" escorted offcampus.

wtag.The inridentis under investi- gation. Dangerous Driving

0145 hrs Sun 3 Mar 96 If you are interested in being a sperm donor and are between 18 and 35 of LL ActViolations years age, Officers stopped a WLU student call the C.H.R.E. Centre between 9:08 weekdays am-12:38 pm and 2:80-4:00 pm. 2010 hrs Fri 1 Mar 96 who had been drivinghis vehicle in Officers All inquiries are held in the strictest confidence. witnessed numerous the snow in an erratic manner in

liquor license violations Successful candidates are reimbursement for their time and their taking parking lot #3, No charges were guaranteed trauel place on campus this evening. laid. expenses.

C.A.A.E. centre, 18 Pine Street, Suite 400, Kitchener, ON, N2H SZB, (519) 578-0090

theCord March 6.1996 5 (News)—

Trouble In Temagami

Considering the world's vanishing supply of

wilderness this terrain, is one natural Jobs prime

resource that Canada still has access to. And

we should be utilizing it. It will take time (and yes, maybe some At Student Publications marketing too, Mr. Harris), but it's a fact, the

adventure tourism industry will be a major,

major job creator and income producer for

to come (unless we destroy what many years WLUSP is currently accepting applications for the tourists about the the find unique area, and followingvolunteer (and some paid) positions... they stop coming, of course). Jobs within this

have much stabil- industry are sure to greater

ity than what timbering and mining jobs do.

Adventure tourism is a perpetual resource. It

does not disappear.

Look at British Columbia for instance. Editor-in-Chief

have idea what's Last They an as to going on. News Editor

year, after many years of destructive environ- Associate News Editor mental abuse, they came to their provincial

and aside than senses so to speak, set more Sports Editor

65 new park reserves with over 22,000 Assistant Sports Editor kilometres wilderness. square of prime Protected Forever Editor ... period. ... period. Entertainment

Yes, it is true, some jobs are sure to be lost JACKSON Assistant Entertainment Editor within the mining and forestry industries, but

be with other indus- Features Editor MATT they'll replaced jobs in tries such as tourism, hospitality, and forest Copy Editor renewal. Production PHOTO: Andrew Scott, an environmental journalist Manager

from British Columbia, in article says a recent Production Assistants

MATT JACKSON he wrote for BEAUTIFUL BRITISH COLUM-

Cord International BIA Magazine: "The most important point to

For anyone that has ever pitched camp in consider is that parks are priceless. The

the wilds. Or has for and ever been separated world is becoming increasingly developed

from don't aside even one evening the urban elements: crowded. Ifwe set parklands now

exhaust fumes. - and the the better - when will city lights, traffic, people, Yes, more we ever Editor-in-Chief

for that has anyone ever sipped hot chocolate do it?" Associate Keystone Editor When will under a blazing starlit sky as vast as eternity So true. we? Fortunately,

who's heart has the British has this Sales itself, or ever quivered at Columbia recognized natural Manager

hauntingly beautiful call of the loon, will tell resource for its future economic and value, Residence Editor that wild vital you places are as to human protected it. To date, a total B.C. territory of

the that 12% has been spiritual well-being as very air we promised salvation, which is

the that drink. breathe, very water we considered to be the minimum requirement

would kind of It seem strange then, if these as per United Nations' specifications. And in

unscathed wilderness the this areas are so essential to future, province will economically

the of and well-bal- benefit from rejuvenation a healthy their government's sound fore- Advertising Manager anced human that be psyche, they so threat- sight. Sales ened. road and than Advertising Representatives By by chainsaw, more I just want to leave you with one final

one million acres of wilderness prime is being thought regarding Ontario. According to gov- Advertising Production Manager devastated across this country every year. ernment officials, the Temagami region is a Advertising Production Assistants The question stands: why does this continue "model management area" with regards to

to happen? the development of industry versus the

The Chalk of wildlands. if it's answer seems simple enough. preservation Well, such a

it Ontario's "model up to money, power, politics. new management area", why then is

concerned provincial government seems Killarney Provincial Park receiving such a

mainly with job in with keeping present positions huge budget comparison Lady Evelyn Photo Manager rather than and intact, creating new innova- Smoothwater in the Temagami region? Photo Technicians tive ones. This means that timbering and As Hap Wilson states, again from his arti-

mining take precedence over maintaining cle in KANAWA Magazine: "...Killarney Park

natural in their that ecosystems original state, a receives a huge budget program and

vital resource for the growing adventure 18,000 user-days, Temagami has to make due

tourism industry. with pittance under the growing strain of

And why not? Mike Harris is governing on increased user traffic which is currently top- Vice President Operations a short term basis; long term problems creat- ping 60,000 user-days each season." What's Vice President Finance ed from today's overharvesting of trees can be with that? Sixty thousand user-days? Nope,

dealt with whoever's here by in power twenty or nobody wants to see a pristine Treasurer from thirty years now. The thinking always Temagami wilderness kept intact. May as will Accounts Recievable Clerk seems short-term; future generations well just slash and burn it all. Build roads

have to fend for themselves. through every valley and mine the thing into Systems Administrator Legendary author and guide Hap Wilson, the ground. Art Director resident and the a guide in Temagami region Come on! We have to stop this. NOW!

for informs us forest many years, in a recent Old-growth is irreplaceable; jobs within Public Relations Manager

KANAWA article: created and industries Magazine "They've the timbering mining are. Mr.

small when a very core park with veneer waterway Harris, may you please hear us we tell

corridors around the buffer wilderness], if it will If and are available in the Cord [of you: you save ... they come. you Applications job descriptions

still unprotected, and have save it... will come. If it... systematically they you save they Offices (third floor, 5.U.8.)

allowed the erosion of once pristine values will come. And they will.

that were inherent throughout the district." For anyone concerned with overdevelop-

Consequently, the outdoor wilderness ment in Temagami, the land of the big pine, I E.l .C. applications and platforms must be submitted by 7 March, 1996 at 4:30 p.m.

has been affected in a horrendous to stand and be heard. We E.I.C. candidates must ofWLU. experience encourage you up be full-time, part-time or cross-registered students

facts and he must and way. Offering figures, adds: act now, rather than simply sit com- The E.I.C. election committee will be voted in at the Cord staffmeeting on 8 March "Over 30% of useable canoe routes outside of plain from our proverbial armchairs. WLUSP 1996, at 2:30p.m. in the Turret. E.I.C. interviews will commence inthe Lady Evelyn Park are now depreciated by Drop a quick note at the CORD offices to offices at 6:00 that evening. roads and As has intrusive development." express your feelings on this subject; I'll be in

the for touch with environmental seemed case many years, government an group in the little bit interests pick away little by by little, by near future, and it would be nice to show All other applications close 8 March, 1996 at 4:30 p.m. bit by bit, not taking large sums all at one them some support from Laurier.

This the Or better Interviews will be in the seven to follow. time. practice effectively disguises yet, write or call them yourself: days

cumulative and catastrophic affects of their EARTHROOTS 401 Richmond St. W. Suite

harvesting to the general public. 251 Toronto, Ontario MSV 3AB (416) 599-

at? A solution. FRIENDS So what am I trying to get 0152; OF TEMAGAMI P.0.80x 520

Maybe. Or perhaps it's more of a suggestion. Temagami, Ontario POH 2HO (705) 569-377

6 March 6, 1996 theCord OPINION

Editorial the Losing labs a sad possibility

included or two the Harris cord Every week, the Letters section of this paper has an offering regarding government's about whether education cuts doom for the cuts to education funding. While everyone can argue spell province

So what is Laurier about them? until they're blue the face, the fact remains that they're going to happen. doing and the decision is it's hard to at this Some decsions have to made, process Not surprisingly, say point. tough

closed doors. But rumours filter around, and some ofthem are frightening. taking place for the most part behind the Business and Economics has decided to One such rumour is that in order to deal with the cuts, School of

business Business 111/121. The logic behind that deci- eliminate the lab portion of the mandatory first-year course

the salaries that are to the student TA's. Avoiding fac- sion is obvious. By cutting the labs, the SBE eliminates paid

student cuts without touching ulty cuts seems to be of prime importance, so eliminating positions expenses faculty A WilfridLaurier University Student Publication positions. Makes for an easy decision. all cutback considera- I that this decision is not indicative of the depth ofthought that has into budget 75 University Avenue West, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3C5 hope gone

first official encounter with the SBE back in first when I attended a mandatory session (519)884-1970x3564 tions. I remember my year 884-7723 told that Laurier's business Fax: (519) for all SBE students during frosh week. In that session, the SBE's Jim McCutcheon us 884-1970 x3566 Advertising: (519) - the method of considered one of the best in the for one reason it focused on case study program was country be in labs in Bus 111/121. Labs that are now learning. The basis for learning the case study method would our

being considered for elimination.

Pick rates schools and of Laurier uses the business here as a card. up any publication that you'll "Don't you know that you are the scum society?" program drawing critical the mentioned as a they are proposing to cut out the section of - Jackie Chan find that the SBE is always strength. Now,

the rest of the builds first year course that program on.

but the isn't thebest one. I know budget cuts are tough, easy solution always

Editorial Board Editorial by Scott Stinson, Editor-in-Chief the Cord the edito- Editor-in-Chief Scott Stinson The opinions expressed in this editorialare those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect those of Staff, rial board, Laurier StudentPublications. News Editor Kathy Cawsey or \\Vfrid University Associate News Editor Tom Hrubes

Entertainment Editor Melanie Seal Assistant Entertainment Editor Aaron Hunter Thanks, Mr. Harris Sports Editor Pete Robinson Dear Editor, Assistant Sports Editor Libbi Hood to entitled This is a response Mike Baker's letter Features Editor David Popovich "Support for Harris". We are not on social assistance so Production Manager Jeremy Ken- that we can sit around eating bonbons watching soaps.

life Instead, we have no alternative. One, because home Cord Staff Letters horrible not allowed to The other was so we were stay. Production Assistants Megan Barnard doesn't qualify for assistance because they love their Coueen Nicholson TotheEditor husband. No script was provided when saying 'I do'. Tina Tarn to Today we have no alternative ifwe want our children Classified Coordinator Christine Romeo eat. Circulation and Filing Tony Tsai smoking! Happy Because Mr. Harris is certain 'welfare bums' are the Copy Editors Ameena Ahsan bled don't Dear Editor, cause of Ontario's resources being dry, we Natalie Haines

the for assistance. As married adults with a I was pleased to see the tobacco advertisement on qualify spouse International Coordinator Lilian Schaer than in than ten months back cover of last week's Cord. It is more com- a training program longer they deny

fit the us assistance. two 1) to the mendable that has seen to support They give us options: lying Student Publications Staff your paper

- then have teach the children Tobacco industry's right of free speech. government no, we to to Photo Manager Marion Hensel staff moved; live the child tax credit. Might I that advertising reserve say mommy 2) on Photo Technicians Phill Kinzinger suggest your for 40 OSAP is available but not to a some free time in their daytimers 30 to years nearly enough support Steve Williams five towards the hence. They will surely want to be free to visit their family of on; it is geared single person. Jenny Wong Baker on how friends and fellow students in hospital, suffering painful- I'm sure Mr. can provide pointers to pay Art Director Andrew White a (which incidentally is repossesed), ly, dying slowly with lung cancer, emphysema, heart mortgage being Systems Administrator Neil Weber disease. utilities, and living (groceries are nice) on $296.50 per Public Relations Manager Carla D Annibale Bob Ellsworth month. This will last until Mr. Harris cuts the Child Tax Advertising Tracey Bowers Manager has next. With of Credit which rumor it is no way get- Ad Sales Representative Rob Hornick Not a 2 fan ting adequate rent perhaps the university is willing to Ad Production Manager Dave Kerth Village in the If allow us living quarters concourse. not, a park Ad Production Assistants Danielle Chartrand Baker Dear Editor, bench in Victoria Park is looking good. Again Mr. Shannon Douds homeless This Saturday, I and other Laurier stu- will be helpful - he has met and spoken to the Treasurer Jamie Hill previous many

and in Toronto. If I to take a ten month dents as well as Waterloo students had the honour agreed retraining

the what? What could I find to pleasure of writing the Business 121 exam. As was course (for job possibly sup- Board of Directors of five on?) then I would qualify for wel- case, Laurier, for a change, did not allocate adequate port a family President Susan Barry that fare. I love husband. amounts of to facilitate its own students such My greatest sin, my Directors Karen Bula space Or husband who his they might write an exam at their own university. a uses you as punching bag. Steve Groenveld David Janzen influence for Understandably with the influx of Waterloo students Let's stay with him! What a positive our Laurie Legault Shayne Lidkea there children. "It's off steam, taking business courses at Laurier, is a larger okay. Daddy's just letting per-

limited than tomorrowit be turn!" A man pressure on our space however, more haps can your responsible

athletic to whom should married? That's how one ends enough space to accomodate is available in the one stay The Cord will not print anythingthat is racist, sexist, or homophobic in nature, as deemed by the staff as a voting the with the body. The Cord will not in violationof its Code of Ethics, outlined in The Cord Constitution. Cord a dead. No, instead we flee in print anything complex. The problem being that of financial one. I up night subscription rates are $15.00 per term for addresses within Canada,and $18.00 for outside the country. The Cord he is a school which clothes on our back and a sleeping child. Because is CanWeb The Cord is member Canadian Press. All is the find it entertaining to know that is printed by Printing. a of University commentary strictly opinion of the writer and does not necessarily reflect those of the Cord staff, the editorial board, or WLU that forced to hundreds of miles renowned around the country for a program a stalker, we are move Publications. Copyright © 1994 by WLU Student Publications, 75 University Avenue West, Waterloo, Ontario N2L well from to feel safe. No safe 3C5. teaches the finer points of time management as as away our community more

havens women's shelters due to cutbacks - is Mr. human resources and managerial accounting cannot at Contributors:. Lori Dysievick, Robin Whittaker, Connie Hawkins, Jason Kalra, Harris that remain in these their resources enough to prevent students suggesting we deplorable Sabrina Saccoccio, Bill Goff, Joel "P" Lynn, George "VP" Raptis, Mike Vencel, Conor manage

McCreery, Laurie Nicholls, Sean Moore, Jim Donnelly, Scott Cullen, Stew Wong. from spending a combined small fortune on cab fare or situations?

the and half shouldn't have had children in the first others such as myself from walking hour a Perhaps we do has to Milage Two due to lack of financial backing. Perhaps place. Should we instead as Mr. Tsubouchi sug-

services? Mr. next time they could at least warn us to pack a lunch. gested and give our children to family

that needs the fact that child On a more serious note, there are two problems Harris to be enlightened to

allocation is the woman's - the male can be identified in this havoc. One being the rearing not only responsibility

Yes! mothers cut 21.6 of space on Laurier campus or rather, the lack thereof. is equally responsible. Single get

Letters Policy such aren't child This can easily be solved by doing the obvious as % and they seeking men to pay support.

• Aft tetters and Sounds like male chauvinism! a lesson, must foe signed and submitted with the author's name, student having facilities at Waterloo for Waterloo students Maybe biology identification number and telephone number. at Laurier for Laurier students. Failing this obviously Mr. Harris: it takes two. Let men start taking more

• AD are If don't want children, letters will be printed with the author's name, tetters can be printed intricate procedure, and since exam facilities divid- responsibility. you keep your zip-

without of Editor-in-Chief. ed the administration the author s nameonly by permission the among business labs, perhaps per zipped. did need for lives ￿Letters must be received by Tuesday at noon for publication in that could consider dividing the labs between Laurier and We not plan nor our to turn out

week's issue via e-mail [email protected] this but did. So what are we about it? We in print, on disk, or to: Waterloo. They don't seem to have difficulty separating way it doing

• from elitist butts an educa- letters that are submitted on disk or via e-mail mustbe accompanied by non B. B. A. students the ever more B. B. A. are busting our trying to get adequate

a hard all this the least that could be done that can a All this and no help from signed copy Finally failing is run tion so we get job. • Letters shuttle bus for those who book Mr. Harris! Thank Ontario. We love the Common mustbe typed, double spaced, and cannot exceed 500 words. a of us cannot afford to a you

• The Cord the edit letter. - if reserves right to any Spelling and grammar will bloody flight aheadof time. Sense Plan only common sense were being applied. not be corrected. Harry Manson Unfortunately, Mr. Baker, will Ontario still be this won-

• The Cord for the rich to reinvest in in five reserves the right to reject any letter to whole or in part, that is derful viable place in violation ofexisting Cord policies. years? Elizabeth Brown and Kathleen Nightingale

theCord March 6,1996 7 (Opinion)— Challenges facing the

African student

Thefirst part ofa two-part series on trying to get an education home. far awayfrom

at of their Canadian room mates Should discard food known the state of health of family mem- of questions, some of which can some they to all their life EDMOND NKANSAH OKCREE bers, pets and other petty talk. If best be said to be downright ridicu- is food. The moment they (African them and switch entirely

Cord Opinion he/she had delusions about lous student to cook their brand to one that is to them? any (e.g. one was actually students) begin foreign That

Ever met with is to starvation wondered what life must be things being the same here as back asked how he got to Canada) which of food at home, they are a sure way in the

like for of reaction. I will midst of And that young man or woman home, this is a wake-up call. The assault the self-image of the African all sorts negative plenty. isn't Canada

leaves and cite to be who family, friends all need to adjust to a new society with student. What makes the situation a two examples that readily supposed a multicultural soci-

is For that familiar to him/her back in different socio-cultural values and bit sad is that such questions are comes to mind. One evening, after ety? some African students,

Africa (or other the intense cold, home at the end of the any continent) and the challenges such an adjustment asked, not by grade students but by trudging through going school

to Canada to become African student home is a real comes study? What poses clear. University students! one got day struggle. Some are

sort with forced to of challenges does such an indi- One problem that students com- The African student is then pre- (which he shared four stay on campus or with

vidual face, what should be the ing from Africa realize and which sented with another problem which Canadian students) to find this note friends, going home late at night

and what oven - "no to Needless response can be done to they go to great lengths to address is most ofthe time had notbeen "bud- posted on the microwave only sleep. to say, the

ensure that both the foreign student in the area of communication. geted" for - that of tearing down a stinking s—t (expletive) in the sort of problems posed to the stu- take dents involved is and the receiving society benefit Realizing the importance of effective set of unfounded, unfair and wrong microwave". It didn't an enormous.

the It is wonder that after from the presence of the student on communication, such students images about hislier homeland that Einstein to figure out for whom no the first

note Canadian soil?. These are some of make sure that their English is well has been implanted in the minds of was intended. About a week or year, African students scramble

the issues this article Some the the student home to find other African attempts to "polished". even go to the some Canadians, thanks to so later, same got frantically stu-

address. The main is their his which dents share emphasis on extent of working on accents biased coverage on Africa given by to find sauce pan of stew, to rooms with during

the of African students to be disas- the western media. the stove when he the academic experiences (which mostly proves a was on was going following year. In a

who direct from the This to the school like Laurier where there come continent ter). is a good and responsible From my experiences, and that campus in morning, missing. are African or Caribbean to study in Canada. effort which must be commended; of other African students I know, I Nobody knew where it was. About not many students, such

The that later sometimes African students born and/or raised right? problem starts when, believe perhaps the most two days when, as a result of attempts don't work out.

Canada not face of the after few weeks months the African stu- weather, the to matter how much in may some a or on daunting challenge warm snow began No is done offi-

that to combat problems will campus, he/she is asked "for how dent in Canada has to contend with melt he looked out of the kitchen cially racism and to

be discussed. been of of tolerance and long have you in Canada?" occurs out the lecture halls. It window to see a piece sauce pan espouse equality in

For many newly arrived African After the response is given the typi- rears its head where the student sticking out of the snow. He went Canadian society, if the African stu-

students, the first that cal like this of - for lo and dent be sign things in reaction goes something spends most his/her time the out a closer look and, goes home to met with such

Canada are not quite the same as "...only two months? How then do residence. The problems some behold, it was his sauce pan. How treatment any gains made come

the home country is when they meet you speak such good English?" African students who share resi- did it get there? Your guess is as crumbling down. It is like pouring

and in is with students mine. the - it greet a friend the hallway Though the question asked with dences Canadian face good as water on feathers of a duck

and before the finishes and with harm and varied. To it all did off. person giv- honesty no intended, are many me, These incidents, which really just drips

the he/she is it down incidents ing response, already is, nevertheless, unsettling to an boils to lack of respect and happen, are not isolated Look for the second halfof this

about Back student. dawns African students ten metres away. home Africa Slowly, it on refusal to accept as (as society will like to believe). They series on challenges facing the

the student from Africa is used him/her "because I One form new speak good equals. thing that generates happen all the time, in one or African student in next week's edi-

to friends in the street and I learnt it in and the Cord. greeting English, must have much controversy tension another, to some African students. tion of

some time spending talking about Canada". This is only one of a series between some African students and What is the African student to do?

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8 March 6,1996 theCord —{Opinion)

What about BOD?: What we do

Directors have three main func- of to deal with If Dear BOD, approving an operating budget tion committees person (i.e. Pres or VP) it is a

Who are those mysterious WLUSU tions: for your $3.8 million dollar corpo- specific issues, opening up new problem then we can either bring

Board of Directors and what the At the Board level they must: ration. Decisions that need to be positions within the Union, or it up at the Board level or they

heck do they do? I)Oversee the activities of the made are put in the form of a making changes to the operating can direct it (or you) to an appro-

A curious constituent President and Presidents. 'motion'. "Be also the Vice For example: it budget (which is passed by priate person (i.e. Dean of

When the President and the Vice resolved that WTJJSU reinvest the Board in the early spring). Students, Student Life Co-ordina-

Presidents make at tor Dear Curious, their reports $200 000 in Wood Gundy pre- 3) On a personal level, the directors etc.)

Directors the Board the directors ferred stock." This actual here to to If The Board of are the elect- meetings, was an are listen you! you In a nutshell, those are the

of will ask that have ed representatives your corpora- questions on your behalf. motion was passed unani- any issues that are of con- responsibilities of the Board. To get

Laurier To make decisions the Board to then to tion, the Wilfrid University 2) on your mously by in cern you bring it their more information, talk to a Director

Students' Union (WLUSU). Every behalf.This could refer to some- November and thus $200 000 attention. If it is a suggestion or in the WLUSU offices. Our office

elections held to form reinvested in Wood then will it hours there. February, are thing as simple as passing a new was Gundy. new idea, we bring to are posted

the Board. campus club or as complex as Other decsions include the forma- the attention of the appropriate Stewart Wong

Do you tell big stories?

BRIAN GOTTMERSAND booked the Concord! believe will like them for who stant the us a trip on habyism, goes way beyond they are. panic, same panic you had

KEVIN-ANDREWDOPKO Well, dad is narcissm. must In it to be when almost Really? my taking me They have a distort- one sense, is easy you got caught lying

Cord Opinion on a trip, on the shuttle! How ed view ofthemselves and the world towards these constant liars, there space angry byceyour parents. I guess is

can with that? around them. it have youcecompete The Maybe the light but some ways you to feel not much you can do about it but know who that Do you someone appears scary thing is I think they actu- refracts different in their eyeballs sorry for them because obviously end the friendship.

to have in their no believe their no problems life, ally own stories. and their optic nerve wiring passes there are some deep seeded prob- I could live with that but I want

matter what to them? I Sometimes, the Habies do the I would happens not even through wrong filters on the lems. love to place a one question answered...Do they

know several people who are like need the excuse of a to the brain? I cannot it recorder in their brains and listen that that telling you way figure know, we know, they are this. They seem to have no stress, story, they just speak to be heard. out, but I'm not a trained psycholo- to the conversations they have with lying?

and have life the tail. To date I have counted nine it is no worries, by gist Maybe cheap drugs? Stay themselves. They must be in a con-

do not to have the Habie They seem prob- friends, nine, can you believe away fromthe brown acid!

lems that the of These rest us face, day to that? are people that I have I think the thing that irks me the

day; they are the big talkers. They hung around long enough to figure most is the fact that the Habies take

lived EXPERIENCE IT appear to have extraordinary out that the stories they have been advantage of people. It's like they

lives and taken the bull the false. I am know that will by telling me were Maybe no one question their fresh coffees • latte & • ground cappuccino, horns. Their stories are the idiot for with it? stories. This has of outrageous putting up been a big topic espresso

• fresh baked breads and obnoxious! are these These Habies lead life of But, peo- a prosper conversation amongmy friends. We cakes & pastries • breakfast, lunch & ple for reaL.Who do think and have all they they good fortune, or so they are concerned about confronting fresh & • pure juices are kidding? I cannot help but you believe. They date people from them because we feel bad and do

think, that not hon- T. know they are being V.,they professional not want to Are at say anything. they Mon. - Fri. fdlfl I t 112 0 0 located - A. estoewith me. do not for Team concerned Bam 11 pm & They appear atheletes, they skied really about our feelings, King University Phil's to be bound moral have all Sat. - Sun. (behind Grandson's) by society's para- Canada, they cycled over when they are lying to us? I think 11 am -11 pm Cr meters. and members of the (TbaJiSiklj .. . Europe, it stems from a lack of self esteem licensed oppo- 884-4953 now

I these are classify people as my site sex always looking at them. and self respect, the fact that they liar No Habitual Friends(Habies). There is also no immunity between cannot accept themselves for who matter what have to tell, the story you sexes, out of my nine Habitual they are. It is too bad that have they always lived life a little liar Friends there are five males, somenone cannot like themselves

fuller than My parents four females. So the race is close. I yours. and that they believe no one else Complement with I roccm your Degree hire education...

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theCord March 6,1996 9 FEATURE

HENSEL Dabbed through the heart MARION PICTURE:

lars for Another is the stoicism to maintain MARY KATE SULLIVAN employers even care about what Uncle Sam's Bingo Palace. are up grabs. a neutral

lack of skill involved. If after fourth Cored Features applicants do in their spare time is a Traffic jams are caused at peak complete you expression your ball

Every time I fill out a job application sign of the incredible attention paid bingo hours as people flock to this win, the bingo gods have smiled lands in the creek There is nothing

I the leisure beacon. when If it's funnier than am faced with to activities in our society. Many times I was favourably on you. you lose, hearing a stream of

inevitable about Recreation has become due failure obscenities uttered in ~ question impor- stuck behind yet another car plas- not to any on your part. a barely con-

hobbies and interests. tant, at least because it has tered with "I Luv Bingo" bumper At rate, the point of having fun tained whisper. Another drawback 0 partly any the amount of Apparently, what I do for spawned hundreds of profitable stickers, I mumbled irritably, "Get a is that you don't need to analyze it. I is walking. All year I

fun is an important indi- industries. For the main- life!" people file in clutch- still don't lover" on complain about the distance to % example, Watching put "bingo my

U cation of how of hometown's dabbers and rabbit's but Zehr's, so would I great I stay my economy is ing sparkly resume, I give a knowing wave why voluntarily

would be at It's could the with the walk miles around flipping burgers. a bingo. For some reason, a game feet, I wondered what inspire to people cheesy a golf course? millions of tricky question. Does it sound too involving dabbing little squares with such devotion to this mindless game. bumper stickers. Strangely enough, people

bookish to say that I like reading? a coloured marker has provided What is the point of spending sharp contrast to bingo is actually like this game.

Does count the of tons of friends bingo as a hobby? Is major revenue. At center money every week in /Inanother popular activity in my My golfing always say sack S hackey a sport? I am always town, there is no statue commemo- the hope of someday winning town: golf. This one always philosophically that golf is a lot like

to life: tempted write down, "drinking rating a fallen war hero. Instead, a ten or twenty dollars? I can J ends up on my resume, even you identify an objective, you ® and life". That statue of Uncle at to coffee reflecting on 20 foot Sam sits atop laugh my naivety now. My though I have played a total of overcome obstacles achieve it,

dissolved this skepticism the night I three times. I'm hoping it will make and you move on. I thought was

still remember sound and realized that played bingo. I can me skillful athletic. In very profound, until I

that the the be said about night. The flourescent lights reality, most important quality of same thing can

haze. The The think were softened by a smoky a golfer is patience. objective of bingo. I don't even want to

called the is announcer numbers golf even stranger than that of about bingo being a metaphor for

faster and card Who decided that be life. faster. As my bingo. it might Even though golf may seem

became covered in a sea of purple fun to try to get a little bail into a lit- more distinguished than bingo on a

dots, my heart began to race. My tle hole? There aren't even the mon- job application, both are just

breath came in short gasps. Only etary rewards that bingo entails. If strange pastimes /|

in one square to go...and then I heard you're lucky, a tournament you involving little

voice call win knitted club balls. Who knows a out "Bingo!" My hopes of might a new set of white

the dollar That's not list these HENSEL winning twenty pot were covers. exactly on my why games are Jf but the still lot I'm dashed, game was a of coveted posessions. fun? sure that many MARION of fun. The most frustrating thing about fascinating books have been written It's to the attrac- that difficult analyze golf is you have to be quiet. on the subject. I would like to read

tion of An obvious draw the Shrieks of and of bingo. is joy groans disgust them, but I don't have any spare thousands of dol- PICTURE: money; sometimes are prohibited. It is an exercise in time right now.

On-campus action

LIBBI HOOD this fate of the the by choosing some for year.

Cord Features free options on campus. If you're not one to venture into

There are Weekends for road-hock- the often, because many times at university are big AC very you're life all that seems like work and no ey on campus where sometimes not much of an athlete just think of

play. Dull, dull, dull, but it two side-by-side are played the hard-earned dollars that ■j games you doesn'thave to be this in the lot. This towards way. gate-arm parking contribute the place every Laurier's virtual isn't campus is a really an option for off-cam- year with ancillary fees. That

with fun to do. dwellers playroom things g pus though, so just just might get you & video use a section of own time. Play pool. Play games. your ff some laps. money and a large enough group

tennis. road, a few (? Play Play road-hockey. grab neighbours, Super-circuit is also in the There are also some new activi- and you're on your way. There is in resi- AC Play basketball. definitely a and pretend you are living now, although it could ties that can be arranged through So if you're sick of mid-terms or when it the dence Just be comes to on- again. glad can £ seem more like work than the AC, for events such to kill time pattern you off-campus essays, or you're trying

activities available to make an fitter snack out of for some Intramural don't campus help game play people. as horseback-riding, canoeing, and between the classes you

or blow-off- own food, rather than are also for you procrastinate your relying sports organized through hiking. attend, just look around campus

steam- on the Hall. the AC and All need is bit of play. Dining they are a really good you a little something to fill the void.

The Student Union Building When the weather is a little

houses plenty of video games and warmer, the tennis courts will again

pool tables in both Wilfs and the be available for mini-Wimbletons. check the AC for llirret. The Food Court also holds a Just in available Must Save Planet! good mix of video games, and times. While you're in the AC feel

for do shoot there's even a change machine free to some swimming,

when out of lift If you run quarters. some hoops or some weights. like stuff Although the pool prices are rea- you feel strutting your why

consider aerobics sonable and video games cost only a not or playing Cord Features this some squash. The is available few quarters or loonies, type of gym bit in the after recreation can certainly add up to quite a spring, most

hooked. Avoid of the athletics have finished big bucks if you get varsity

10 March 6, 1996 theCord —(Feature)

child Feeding your inner

horrible teen As I'm after all it's who comes out of the woodwork to KIMBERLEY FLOOD group of kids playing outside? They vive my years. joining me, amazing

this noticed that there still how this behavior can hide-and-go-seek, but Cord Features are all running around, screaming writing I contagious play you

and the the is outside to make be. could start with bubbles or I didn't know she existed until some- giggling. By time game enough snow blowing

not kite or even with bottle of bub- and their wind down they some snow angels. Think I'll to Okay, so maybe you're ready flying a doodling one gave me a soap energies go

23rd She all look the relaxed the and see if ends to yell Ollie-Ollie oxen free and see crayons. bles for my birthday. same. They're park anybody up and Once time that didn't introduce herself right away, smiling. upon a

all of but we've kept up quite the friend- was us.

the to Somewhere between ship over years. Now, just becoming stressed with backtrack for a moment when I out school, work and Just like a kid I did the various other commitments we have again unwrapped my gift polite grown-up-thing and graciously forgotten what it was like to have be "imma- though; it never ends. Everyone thanked the giver, n.ot realizing#h§t that kind of fun. Once I started try- ANN HUSKINSON caught doing anything

needs break. to had hand at it I was Cord Features ture". Moore that immaturity is a Remember enjoy a lifetime treasureshe intro-f ing my again says smile and sat at how level shot "Work hard. hard." Words of sometimes a natural, positive Remember to duced me to. TJie soap bubbles samazed my energy Play yourself.

overall wise who I convinced to life events and it cer- more. Remember to stop under my kitcloh sink for months lip, as well as an improve- a woman am response laugh the X. *' "-■< mood. holds the secret to a bal- is not something to be being so serious all time. unopened. || ifient in my happy, tainly

life. tell that ashamed of. We can also see this Remember to stop to smell the I didn't again until 1 # What really sold me on the con- anced Psychologists us The of and we need to take time to relax, play, thwarting of child-like Ift the roses. next time you see some was tackling some spring cleaning cept finding feeding your energy kids of leaves chase muter inner child was series of motiva- and meditate life; all of this to our children jumping in a pile or to hopefully away njy a upon way argdbcializ^|| level. down hill on their blahs. Smiling, I picked them tip and tional seminars I took. One of the reduce our stress Personally, Many people fc<)nstanll| trj» to sliding a crazy of children. not them? Don't started to reminisce howmuch fun I things they suggested that we all do I'm not sure if all stress is unhealthy. make little jidtilts out carpets, why join be and as a watch watch to "Grow is the term often afraid to now use to have with soap bubbles is to people; especially It certainly seems impossible up* get dirty every

should then; the will come out. And little kid. As 1 opened the bottle I people's attitudes and what affected have a life completely devoid of any employed. Why we expect stains

"hello". sat them. started older stress Stress children to do adult-like in work will be for heard a faint I on my I watching peo- or worry. for some, things an your waiting you

arent adults. when arrive back home. But balcony and started to blow bub- ple and I noticed that the seniors including myself, may even serve as adult-like way? They you

wand who in the best condi- motivator. about all of is not to be be and life bles. As I was waving the to were physical a Thinking Growing & process now you may smiling,

bubbles make tion with outlook the tasks I must rushed. it should be the not look so bad after all, see howmany 1 could a positive on life complete causes may

realized that the who still But I mature lessons from the the of child. with one dip I suddenly were ones enjoyed to my stress levels to soar. once takirtg through eyes a

I off butt and I believe children hold 1 was grinning from ear to ear. play. never saw them complaining; get my complete some imrnaturqp

Goodbye winter blahs hello inner they always saw the positive in a sit- of those tasks, I feel somewhat UielSecrfii of life; they smile more, the of with also the that I work best and than the child. In process playing uation; they were ones relieved. also under* laugh more play more

weren't around either. I should of adults. what is commonly known as a rushing I pressure, or perhaps sty majority Overall, they

took this informal that work under I to life more and to child's game or toy I realized that I then study to peo- I only pressiire. seem enjoy forgot how much the human spirit ple who I was working with. At the need to feel the scorch of theflames remember what is important. I'm

that the heat is that should live needs to play in order to not die of time I was in advertising so I got to to realize on. %ot saying people of but need lives boredom or stress. I'd been taking watch a lot eccentric people, What people really are Jheir completely carefree,

whose stress all I'm my life far too seriously becoming the artists, profession management skills; learning denying responsibility. just

theadult of them to miniature bas- how to minimize stress and that all deserve and caught up in game being allowed put hss tp:i saying we truly responsible and getting ahead: ketball nets in their offices and play deal with it when it d()e|jjcist|p need some "playtime" along with all

Somewhere the I had around in their Most the work time in. There along way for- order to promote along. importantly| pebpife we put fun. flow of the need remember hours in the gotten how to have simple creative ideas were ones to to t() never are enough day.

It's not fair that kids have the who seemed the happiest. Even the allow the child to Very few people get everything done

of that should. monopoly or great games like hid|| miserable continuation winter in emerge every now I am they Numerous people, HENSEL

and them down. titled feel and-go-seek tag. At some point March couldn't bring currently reading a novel myself included, even guilty

all decide that it's not cool to The times that I this "Care of the Soul" iby Thomas about a break to do some- we appreciate taking MARION play those games as we're too new entertainment is when the Moore. He speaks of individuals thing enjoyable. "I really should be

instead". mature to be caught dead doing that bankbook reads zero. Not only does being ashamed of their child-like doing such and such

- too bad. work Not only are children's feeding my inner child give me the tendencies. So many people hate to There will always be more PICTURE: games and toys fun, but they're much needed (cheap) break, but it

and of also reminds will cheap a great way relieving me that times get stress. Have you ever watched a better. After all, I did manage to sur-

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theCord March 1996 6, 11 SPORTS

Smith leads UW to Cup

PETE ROBINSON Lemelin. Lemelin stopped 48 shots

Cord Sports in the losing effort as the Waterloo

How fitting it was. forwards subjected the netminder to The , a team a game-long barrage of rubber. The

whose work ethic 53-24. longshoreman's final shot tally was them has made virtually unstop- Laurier hosted the tournament since pable Christmas, followed the and early accounts suggest that it

lead of their one of hardest pluggers was a resounding success. It was

to the Queen's Cup Championship the second such hosting effort by the

on Sunday. local hosting committee and with

Steve Smith counted the has two goals success, Laurier established

and assist Warriors an topace the to itself as the leading school in the 5-1 a victory over UQTR Patriotes. OUAA for hosting such events. His efforts earned him MVP of Big crowds, good sponsorship

the tournament. money and an outstanding football

The game was mired in some facility all combine for what will like-

the Pats elected controversy as to ly mean Laurier hosting the

not dress their six Bowl top players for the Churchill next season.

contest in order to save them for Saturday's semi-finals, played in

next week's National Championship front of crowds of 2400 and 1200,

in Toronto. held UQTR knocking off Guelph 4-2 PICTURE

"It was an decision for our and Waterloo Laurentian 4- easy beating RLE team," said Patriotes head coach 1. here Laurier earlier this The University of Waterloo Warriors, pictured in game action against year, cap- Dany Dube. In the final, the scoring didn't tured the Queen's Cup lAst weekend as the best hockey team in Ontario. Dube's squad had endured the start until UQTR scored first early in

suspension of their top scorer, Marc the second but Waterloo came

after assessed tie minutes the end of the New end. Beaucage, he was a storming back to four game. year ofthe Jersey Devils.

two in Far Peter A two teams game suspension the later on a Brearly goal. The game was the defining solid, defensive-minded The will now prepare

East division series the wilt- moment for the after final against In third, Lemelin finally Warriors a defence corps and forwards that all for the National semi-finals on

Ottawa. In ed under relentless the forward addition, UQTR had suf- pressure when season in which they surprised seem to play in power Saturday. UQTR will battle Acadia in

fered final the first some injuries in the Greg Esdale scored early in the everyone-including themselves. mode, despite the fact that some are game on Saturday at Varsity

league games before the playoffs third. Smith then potted his two Despite having only one bonafide on the smallish side, the Warriors Arena. Waterloo will take on

to Dube's shorthanded the other in the second contributing concern. goals, one on star, in John Wynne, the Warriors play a smothering style that rarely Calgary game at

The close two the to game was kept for power play, ice the win. Matt have dominated the OUAA in the gives up second chances in their Varsity as well.

because of the St.Germaine periods outstanding finished the scoring second half by using a work ethic own zone and create what seem to The final goes Sunday at 7:00

Patriotes with brilliant individual effort goaltending of goalie J.P. a at reminiscent of the playoff drive last be a million of their own at the other pm at Maple Leaf Gardens.

Hawkey's agony is over

JIM DONNELLY and Western Waterloo. Many of the deserved better. To be sure, Schnare Martin Kindree, Steve Hooper, Gowing had him play defense this

Cord Sports such 4- the team in White games were hard-fought, as kept many games when Smitty Kulafofski, and Todd year after he was a quality third-line

"Realistically, a team must well 2 and 4-3 losses to Western, but still didn't deserve to be and will all from the team after play they con- depart winger on some very good Laurier to make the and Haven't annihilations like 9-3 the playoffs, we others were tributed heavily in team's 5 wins. this school year, leaving Matt TUrek teams, shows how hurting the

we11... is 6-1 Waterloo. The played Hie regular season and versus only thing for the team to do as one of the only talented veterans defense corps was.

to eliminate the weaker and the team's win look left. teams, After first against now is to next season and try The fact that Laurier really has

we are one of those teams... I'm Windsor, Laurier to somehow build This again proceeded to upon it. past Concerning the departed vets a no quality rookies that are capable relieved the season's over." lose 4 in succession before season's rookies will be few deserved finally games more expe- truly better. Kulafofski of being impact players next year

These are the late-season words their next rienced and and Schnare to victory. Thus, a pattern mature, finished a stellar five year career shows the dire need recruit. of Laurier men's coach for hockey began: every Laurier win, there will be coming of age as an experi- that saw him play pivotal roles on Gowing agrees:

Go who's team entered would be 4 5 to OUAA netminder. Hawk "The next Wayne wing, or losses accompany enced However, every team he played for. key ingredient for us

the 1995-96 season with less-than- it. The team would seem to the ominous of Cullen finished three solid the off-sea- play prospect graduation a year career year is recruiting in Most optimistic expectations. people, aggressively and competitively looms larger than ever over the in which he was an effective role son,"

however, never dreamed that the more talented teams such against as Hawks; Cary Pageau, Scott Cullen, player. For Pageau, the fact that Let the rebuilding begin. Hawks would end up far below .500 Western (and as a result keep the

and miss the coach weaker the playoffs; for game close), but then versus

to utter these statements as the teams they would come out listless

drew close and campaign to a can only apathetic (and lose games they

indicate that the Hawks performed conceivably could have won).

even worse thanexpected. Frustration began to set in on the Ont. in V-ball

With an unenviable sea- and and soon hurting regular players, coaches, fans,

son record of 5-20-1, good for last it became expected for the Hawks to

in the Far West division of the lose. PETE ROBINSON head should take place same spot, to up Ontario reason why Ontario a this both with the of Cord Sports OUAA, past season is one As any team, pain women. good hard look at their member- internal the players and coaching staffwould inferiority brings strife. For The National Championships for The OWIAA West did not have ship in the QAU V

to the Hawks this conflict was vented both Men's and understandably like forget. Bright Women's a representative in the women's There Is no denying that the

spots on the roster were few and far midway through the season when were held last weekend tournament situation has created an unlevel

between, and the consis- veterans Brian Stevens and and showed a Hie whole only thing Ryan they recurring scenario might fee playing field. To put things into this with tent about the Hawks season Merritt left the team along theme; that Ontario, and especial- symptomatic ofa developing prob- perspective, Ontario constitutes 14

was being on the losing end of most promising rookie defenceman Bob ly the OUAA West, is sorely lack- lem in CIAU athletics. Umvmities of the OAlfs 35 member schools. of the games. McQuat. This was a huge blow to ing in terms competitiveness. both out west and down east offer Yet they simply cannot beat

team the which even the fifth limited The was hard hit by last team, before this For straight year in financial aid to student- powerM Western and Quebec

had the worst in both the and athletes. year's graduation, losing standout arguably defense Men's Women's Ontario offers no such schools in head-to-head competi- Chris the and the players such as John Spoltore, league relied heavily on Championships Ontario schools assistance. tion.

Mark Strohack, and Don few veterans Med to win amedal. A ClAtf George, remaining. frequent occurrence, espe- In the final analysis, Matt Turek Coach who the Not T McConnell. Forwards Cowing, at begin- since 1991, when U of dally in a sport like voOeybal, is a VoßeybaH Championships, despite Kulafofski, with of the had that did for the and York and Smitty along ning year predicted man for the

the slack this season and put a been "a dismal with no Manitoba for the 3-1 from schools out of It Ontario school up pretty year, won men, province. is a ft shows, as an

veterans respectable team on the ice. positive aspects the over Alberta and Alberta defeated situation that has athletic a National among many has never won rookies." Unfortunately this didn't occur. or Laval 3-1 in the women's final. administrators and coaches inthis Championship in men's or

horrible One of the few was Western fee men's nation- After a pre-season (0-7- bright spot was highest province steaming. In fart many of women's competition since the the excellent of finisher for Ontario, with sixth those 1), the Hawks began year losing consistently play a people, looking at the big al tournament play was intro-

to arch-rivals goalie Geoff Schnare, who place finish. UofT finished the the their first 7 games truly ir picture, think problem is a big duced in 1980-81.

12 March 6,1996 theCord (Sports)— University hockey's shame

backlash retribution coach of the Patriotes. So bla- PETE ROBINSON coach Dany Dube undermined the gramand its personnel may turnup was simple by UQTR

the and their Dube's failure Cord sports Commentary legitimacy of his league's champi- even more disturbing news? purged players par- tant was to seriously

ents'. In sort this contest the that he When I woke up Monday morning I onship by throwing up the white For Guelph the problems began a strange of way game, only

the surrender kicked off dressed seventeen instead rather anxiously went to get flag of and not dressing when three players were argument may carry limited weight players,

to see what the Toronto six of his best seven players in the team after what had The apparently were of the maximum twenty. His reason- paper apparently players terms to been number of who that his team had been dailies gave in of coverage Sunday's Queen's Cup a discipline prob- unsavoury types were prob- ing was

before to with fluke and the OUAA Hockey Final Four last Championship. lems. It turnedout that the final inci- lematic even they came plagued injuries with weekend in Waterloo. First, about Moncton. When last dent in that pattern of behavior, was Guelph. inopportune suspensions lately,

the to in the What that in mind he didn't want to As a shuffled my way through year's defending CLAU champion, refusal take part annual Muylaert's supporters are jeop-

three Toronto eliminated from rookie Such the is the ardize his team's chances in the two of the major Aigles Blues, were party. parties in past doing though missing point.

AUAA in have include such Incidents to extent of Nationals. paper's, I saw that they chose to the playoffs overtime, they been known to of hazing the

stormed the ref which where the the incidents are a of So what Dany? Instead spit ignore it. At first I was dismayed in protest, rituals as playing games Guelph thing you

should ended where should went the in the face of the and the and then I realized, why they up in an ugly incident "losers" have to eat marshmallows the past that have league

four and that shoved their of the dinosaur 2,000 or so fans who showed for bother? Moncton players an assis- were previously up way long ago. up

rectums. the final? Is it wonder Canadian Why would any publication give tant coach speared the referee. Apparently in Guelph's Anyone who defends such practices any

of to an The the case this was no In fact, is in the dark and proba- fight the uphill bat- any semblance good press university suspended exception. living ages University sports

outfit that has taken part in three of four players and fired the coach but their coach Marlin Muylaert seemed bly has the collective wisdom of a tle for legitimacy with this type of attitude. the most disturbing episodes in all of it wasn't the first time that the to condone such parties when he cereal box.

the of weeks. school's had been interviewed the Toronto The that in universi- Would it not have been better to sports in past couple program in con- was by fact players The three that I talk Last Moncton Sun's Christie Blachford. at 20 dress those and roll all four episodes troversy. year, a play- ty hockey are usually least players

the for four inside the old and sometimes close lines in addition to about are disgusting displays by er, was suspended years People hockey pro- years to making sure they

Moncton and the when cocaine. at to think makes such incidents clear of trouble? the University of he tested positive for gram Guelph seemed thirty even stayed

As if Would be stretch that that the that the Rookie It be unfair to Dube's hockey team. it a to say a problem was not more concerning. parties are may group

Junior hock- move with that of Moncton's and those weren't enough, TVois Rivieres more thorough check of this pro- party took place, they say that the common occurrence in between but the fact remains ey, where players are 15 Guelph, why

and20. would a league who struggles for all but for value ... am/flexibility this dis- There may be Muylaert, whose team lost to the publicity they get allow

UQTR in the semi-finals on Saturday play on the weekend? There are ,here is n0 better way rhpanpr wave A to miss their first National some truly impressive athletes in the Cncaper WayS with in four QAU and some to go than a Championship appearance outstanding support

seasons, is truly a great coach. He personnel. They all may suffer from

ws Student Class took tO Oct tO has continually fielded outstanding these outbursts of lunacy that

teams ever since he took over the place over the past week and a half. airfare from when it floun- So next time when the Toronto c JfeL Guelph program was ElirOPe... Travel CUTS! dering in the late eighties. He has Star or Sun or even the Globe for

probably put up with enough grief that matter, choose to give university

to last a lifetime over this incident. hockey the cold shoulder, instead of

However, the bottom line is that let- shaking their heads at their per-

ting such behavior go on or even ceived ignorance, maybe university

look further condoning it is unbecoming of a hockey fans should no

coach with a stellar record like his. than three of the top teams in the

Such is the case with Dube, country. ::iravelcuis

886^8228 Student Union Building

The Travel of the Canadian Federation of Students Mmmmm... Ont. Reg #2785i00 Company

hove Do you a friend that you

would never want to lose?

If answered you yes to this question, nominate them for the laurier Student Help line's

...Ever Wonder What

Real Bagels Taste Like? They're Here.

All have to do to is you nominate a friend write a one page submission

about oh why they are an sooo good friend and you could win

Dinner for 2 jtVjoo_ <

off submissions I IB J Just drop your in the Laurier Student Help

Line Coordinator's mailbox in the Student Union office by A Dozen March 15. JA Bagels

The letter about the most helpful and oustanding friend will be published in the Blue Pog CordMarch 27th. Sagels Maybe it will be you! 150 University Ave. (Corner of Philip) Exp. March 14/96

13 March 6, 1996theCord -{Sports) McMaster robbing himself

SCOTT CULLEN made the for Stevens in a deal that the like McMaster will be by Kings' general manag- Kelly Hrudey starting in net, sacri- Kevin dealing again.

Cord Sports and to be defenseman like North American media, and McMaster was a fine GM er, it seems no coincidence ficing a good young right- truly in Sam 'The Disaster' McMaster that the him junior with the has Kings have been plummet- Zhitnik for Fuhr made absolutely no fully so, grilled for. hockey Sudbury

struck again, and the Los since their in the The did Even before the trade, Wolves. However he is Angeles ing appearance sense. Kings not bother to Gretzky clearly over-

are now in a free-fall for the 1993 McMaster had an to matched in the Kings Finals. re-sign Fuhr, so they have painfiifly opportunity big leagues. Now, foreseeable future. deal. He traded two Unfortunately, McMaster has played little to show for losing Zhitnik; a make another sent young having away ofthe finest

Last week, McMaster traded in the trend that to the d-men in the no small part Kings' woes. would continue. defenseman Darryl Sydor yound game. Too bad

center but Last Stars for he didn't trade them for superstar , season, McMaster made a In the off-season, Los Angeles Dallas tough, young a GM who

in return the Zmolek and could have his team. Kings picked up deal that surely must have marked won the first NHL draft lottery, defenseman Doug helped LA Craig Johnson, Patrice him as an which enforcer Shane Churla (apparently Until the prospects easy target for opposing allowed them to pick third ownership group Tardif and Roman Yanic the does about Vopat, plus a general managers. He traded veter- overall. They managed to pluck tal- to protect Perreault, something McMaster, LA's first-round in this draft, an defenseman Charlie ented d-man new number-one center). legacy willbein the words pick year's Huddy, young Aki-Petraßerg. Kings' of

and fifth-round to have men like John a pick in 1997. backup goaltender Robb Stauber, However, McMaster then traded While McMaster appears Muckler, David Poile,

Granted, (he 1997 draft is projected and promising defenseman Alexei his first round pick in 1996 for lost yet another deal, the acquisition Bob Gainey, and now Mike Keenan

to be one of the deepest drafts since Zhitnik to the for Dmitri Khristich and Byron Dafoe. of extra toughness should make saying:

1979, but the is still defensemen It looks "Thanks, Sam." pick likely a young Phillipe Boucher Was it really worth it?On the surface Marty McSoiiey expendable.

middle or late first-rounder. and Denis butSam Tsygurov, and aging goal- it may appear so, gave up a

The deal is the latest Grant in Gretzky just tender Fuhr. what will be a top-five pick order

in a line of For that had long questionable deals a team already to get these two players,

McMaster still p was not gun-shy this |§ when it came time to deal Ed the interest- Mac and U of T| season. He swaped Rich Tochett

on top in Men's b-ball

PETE ROBINSON

Cord Sports

The OUAA Men's Basketball season is

all but over, with division winners

Toronto and Mac set to battle for the

OUAA title next week.

Both teams will be in next week-

end's nationals in Halifax by virtue of

their victories to their respective divi-

sional finals last weekend.

Mac used then- excellent mix of a

low and quality post game, deadly

outside shooting to get past Western 75-71 in an entertaining game at I lamHton's Copps Coliseum.

The game was the finale of the

Wild West Shootout that saw Western

get past a tough, upstart Waterloo team. Mac qualified for the final by handily defeating Lakehead, PICTURE Western did weß to be to it until

the final FILE buzzer. Earlier in the year

they were embarrassed 301-67 by Mac's Tftus Charmer leads his

Mac a telecast. The on province-wide team against Toronto next week.

Mustangs can still qualify for the pre- cious remaining Wild Card berth in Mac will be legitimate National title

Halifax when a decision is made early contenders.

next week. (I of T continued their assault

For McMaster, the win (combined toward a league and National title by

with Guelph's early playoff exit) was downing Laurentian 71-68 In the that proof they are perhaps the most OUAA East final m Toronto on Sarah successful teamin the West division in Sunday. jessica parker

the five Head Coach The past years. joe Blues tost to eventual champi- Easo considered be last is by many to the on Concordia in year's National eric schaeffer finest coach the in league, and per- Championship semi-final, and are

As he haps even the country. long as looking to better that performance elle macpherson is on the sidelines In the Steel City, tills time around.

McGinnis hockey pool

Rank Name Points Total Last Week IF LUCY FELL 1 PhilAdamson 723 1

2 Matt Gillis 1 A comedy for the romantically challenged 3 Ben Cornwell 716 3

4 Tlrevor AJlibon 705 4 15 5 Rob Manger 677 5 6 Shaup Kennedy 675 6 11HISfin i HON 1111 Cilll IFIIII SEEIIE SHE! s, ■■« bibii1111i

7 ChrisCaj&$&ell 67Z —

8 Ben Duriiat '• 661 . 10 Sli JESSICA PIE! EH SIEEEEIB SIIEEEI EllE 111 'If LUCT EEEE' JAMES 111 .. 9 X Hm Dietrich 666- . 13 v% Bill ill! ill i JIM "IB PEIIISaII JBlflll 11S1EEEE1 ill 10 | Jeremy Keep 6581 y?' • f &\'A'

'* ij:; '* W'- BI 11- 1 Brad Savage 650!' 8 "ffIIWIEFEt ""BlHEll SIEIEBEEI !iJ«EE "«SlEFFEl :: 12 Scott Cuflen . 647 -* 10 «Or J3SZ. AT ODSS 12 Dave Miller 647 9 THEATRES MARCH BTH rSß'il starS

I !WU Top ttsiu •HICK 14 TVevor Gardner 644 — VISIT THE SONY PICTURES ENTERTAINMENT SITE AT http://www.sony.com

15 Rob Crowley 641 —

theCord March 6,1996 14 ENTERTAINMENT

Poet offers sensual delight

KALRA at St. Jerome's stanza about number takes and JASON Room College, I felt poem a of you one place

Cord Entertainment then throws no pressure, paradoxically confident things (yes, including hobby horses). you some-

tell that Bruce of what didn'tknow. When I Whiteman where it If I were to you I say s poetry is else, fuses togeth-

at St. Jerome's when Whiteman "number of I'm not that feel Whiteman spoke So, Bruce came on a things", try- er so cleanly you

the I of to be obscure evasive. the words College at UW. please forgive in. suppose part me expected ing or are just compo-

but 1 him to fulfill he'd Whiteman is hard to nents of presumption, imagine your my stereotype: s poetry very a larger piece.

would be similar mi le. have and that this is response to probably a pompous classify (some might argue Often, larger piece

Wu he the human itself. In (What is a Bruce Whiteman? unwelcome air, snarling as though poetry defies classification, but that's body

sell I once someone had doused the another His to of his the try to me liberally topic). approach many poems, I is in he will- knew a guy named Bruce that ventilation system with roadkill. poetry confident that is body comes to represent

if I universal wanted to kill.) But what were to However, much to my delight, he ing to exhaust the entire language the search for

that Bruce Whitemjm is a dressed and for that if ideals and understand- tell you was very casually com- right word, even (on a sur-

it In I Canadian poet? Your response posed. And when he spoke, face level) another word might ing. this sense,

his to PHOTO might be, "Oh. Guess it's 1 ot the wasn't some contrived speech, but a appear more fitting. Yet poetry would be inclined con-

wanted kill, informal about isn't in that sider Whiteman more of same Bruce 1 to tl en." wonderfully talk so overwhelming you FILE himself and his In the read and become than for the Beyond advertising my igno- poetry. fact, it aware of your a philosopher a poet,

have of his talk that seemed mood It invades is to ideas and Visible to rance of Canadian poets. I a only part changing. you idea contemplate Stars, opening yourself

for the the of and the the limitations Whiteman's universe. The good reason mentioning pre-planned, was reading cer- slowly subtly; simple pho- meditate beyond of poems

authors I've read have in his the words existence. not above. Most tain poems newest collection. netic appeal of often our pragmatic are only entertaining in them-

to than the words don't but been familiar to me some degree. Visible Stars (The Muses Company, meaning more I by any means dislike selves, often hilarious and

At least I've read Ste. themselves about but I I the very reviews, .Anne de BeOevue, PQ.: 1995. (when talking why poetry, am suspicious of it. provocative. Even more, they are a

or people have talked to me about 115 pages, softcover). he chose the title "Kubla Khan don't like being condescended to by medium through which one could

But I them. I've never heard, read, or was beyond dazzled with what Palimpsest" for one of his poems, a poet who thinks they have some enter a vividly textured realm of

about I heard. link to talked to anyone Bruce The poems were lyrical Whiteman talked a bit about superhuman virtue that they dangling images, playful sounds,

a result, I had no and but a a must to like Whiteman. .As playful, with a very earthy Coleridge, bit about what relay me. I being primal sensuality, and acidic due and then have expectations of him; no precon- edge to a discriminating injec- palimpsest is, ultimately allowed to think, and even to a humour.

of what his tion of sexual And when said he drawn the sounds different of ceived notion poetry imagery. was to of markedly interpretation As is true with most brilliant

be read wasn't the words the would like. Whiteman them, he themselves). poems than the author had. writing, you can read Whiteman at

I felt like But — he what I most Whiteman that free- whatever it a sponge. feeling merely reading was building Perhaps was gives you level you feel, be surface could and like a sponge has its merits. I images feelings. At times I impressed with was the balance dom, suggesting directions but by or deeper, or all the shades in bask in and feel he had to and struck between and between. it is intimate my ignorance more thought fight pausing activity passivity no means concretely defining where Ultimately, an

than to Bruce to Not have for Some to willing despise looking away regroup. nearly (I a thing balance). you're supposed go, why you're experience that only you can and/or his and of Whiteman poetry, all the poetry was so engrossing, elements of the poems hit you hard supposed to go, or what you're sup- describe. Meeting Whiteman was a feel add "Oh, that exhaus- feel. not compelled to Bruce is to say, so admirably (in particular the sexual imagery), posed to His genuine unassum- benefit that I'm grateful to the Cord wasn't to his usual standard", tive. Some hilarious, others are calm and is built into the him up or were outright yet gentle (such ing nature poetry, for; reading is an experience

Bruce has lost his touch". favorite the cosmic But instead to at all "maybe my personal being as imagery). allowing you go your own pace. that is wonderfully, selfishly, my

stared around the Common — As I Xiiriatioris on a Hobby Horse a 14 of it being an aggressive piece that I highly recommend looking at own. Headstones flaunt their big rock personality

ROBIN WHITTAKER of the body-surfing mayhem, one view after the show, Dillon himself and

Cord Entertainment crazed fan ran on stage, knocking mentioned marijuana and alcohol. I The Headstones' Hugh Dillon is a out guitarist Trent Carr's patch cord. When I asked what influence these had

contrasts. He study in then proceeded to take the mic substances had on his music, he the

As the band Fed Hall from Dillon to of ignited sing an entire verse answered "What do you think?"

with the riff All Over." With Carr Saturday night opening "It's ranting at He soon continued by noting that Dillon to "Cemetery," promptly the side of the stage, Dillon told the drugs had "changed [him] from

the — began spitting on audience audience, "personally I like that.... hockey to Rock & Roll," noting his his trademark. He then I've done concert it before!" Carr eventually ice time alongside current Leafs' proclaimed, before "Tweeter and the man to persuaded young stage captain Doug Gilmour. Dillon is now PHOTO the Monkeyman," "we're gonna dive back into the pit. doing what has always wanted to play hear!" Like In and he FILE songs you wanna one captivating moment, after do, is loving it. opportunity to any jerk we're to call our catching a in his happy fan's spit mouth, Often considered "that other ask him about his musical influ- ered to their dressing room friend, Dillon maintained the of Dillon into the air himself and the aura spat band," Headstones after the show — Kingston ences. soon followed by a someone who wanted to piss off the swallowed it. "Oh God!" he the third and fourth said who had been my performed vers- "Basically everything," Carr, girl body surfing non- guy next to but never exclaimed. "I did it!" of "New you, you per- es Orleans is Sinking," to standing out from the other three stop throughout their three-song sonally. on to more serious Moving top- the great delight of the crowd. band members with his clean-cut encore. With Junkhouse opening act ics, Dillon, on their asked commenting up- I Dillon about his relation- appearance. "I was a huge fan of Neither the plate nor the girl had singer Tom Wilson cancelling his awards asked with The coming appearance, ship Hip. "I used to doodle Devo and The Clash... and also left the room by the time our inter- solo hours just earlier because of the audience "should we swear with Gord [Downie] during class in KISS." view was over.

the audience waited when laryngitis, we to this Junoshit?" school," he said, was go grade stressing It apparent that Dillon and The Headstones used this con-

for their band Oh, and the music? The their patiently hard-playing early friendship. Carr are the heart and soul of the cert as an opportunity to test out When go on stage. the Headstones maintained their dis- Dillon was a difficult Headstones. "It's like dressing fun, yet a marriage," some new songs, such as "Cut me room door finally opened, allowing tinct, sound, characterized man to talk to. As he admit- commented Dillon. "I love this driving readily Up," from their up coming third thick smoke to forth from with- Carr's he by ted, was — pour scratchy guitar, Tim very easily distracted man." album, which they will start record- in, Dillon's mohawk hairdo and White's and of of heavy, rolling bass, spending most the interview talk- As for the Headstone's ex-drum- ing May Ist, in England. trademark blue sweatshirt Dillon's somber vocals. Fed ripped course dark, ing to Hall's sound man, and mer "Mark Gibson," Dillon said he When I asked how the album signaled their approach. As well, Dillon added to he "couldn't take playfully returning answer my questions at had left because will differ from the first two —

Fed Hall to tunes such his exploded rendition of Sheryl Crow's "All I unpredictable moments of his the pressure." Picture of Health and Teeth and

as "Hindsight" and "Hearts Love Wanna Do," the to At in the inter- changing lyrics choosing. one point Hugh Dillon convinced me that Tissue — Dillon responded in his and Honour," which Dillon dedicat- "All I wanna do is view, finished his had ... not get a gun having drink, success changed his outlook own evasive way: "Our first album ed to "some old friends who shuffled There was no one left on the Santa Dillon tossed his glass out of the on life. The fun he has on-stage is was like we were on first; our sec- 0ff.... Fuck the west coast! East Monica boulevard!" sound booth and the extension on to stage, an of his outgoing, capti- ond was like we're on second; our coast, man!" Before ripping into "Unsound", two below! flights vating personality. third is like we're gonna go around Throughout the show, Dillon Dillon announced, "we're "I didn't "As the looking get caught by the long as bus doesn't crash third and steal home. held the mic to various audience for Oh, smoke You dope! ... we p0t.... police.... didn't see that," he on the way to a gig," said Dillon, "Our obligations are met," he members who either the We came all the from Ottawa warned sang way me. "we're psyched." commented. "At this point I'm words they knew (or thought without Sure, but I the below Dillon they today drugs!" hope guys Still, is a study in contrast, happy."

knew), or just screamed as loud as The Headstones are often did. and did them us success not stop from And so are the body-surfing fans they could. At one point, in the heat labeled as a In inter- Carr walked drug-band. an into the interview having a large plate of veggies deliv- of Canada'sown Headstones.

theCord March 6,1996 15 (Entertainment)—

Villa Nina an exotic spice experience

with the remarkable taste ofthe rice. GEORGE RAPTIS, from the chairs to the bottles to the lunch." The bread is served a was

that Fran rec- was grateful JOEL LYNN AND chandeliers enhance the cozy baked garlic clove which you spread George to and oil soaked buns. ommended the meal him, FRAN WDOWCZYK atmosphere with a modern, wel- over your it when intrinsic For the main Fran had ordering visiting Since dining out is an part coming charm. course, suggests "It Villa Nina. of student life, who better to invite to Fran began her meal with the the pizza special. was very spicy wide vari- dealof chick- The bistro also has a lunch with us than Laurier's own hummus, which Joel and George and had a great grilled We with it. and The of rich and tasty desserts. Student Life Coordinator, Fran both agreed was very tasty a en on Fabulous filling! ety room with make sure to save Wdowczyk. Fran selected Villa Nina healthy amount of garlic. Joel had portion was very good enough suggest you home-made bit actually took for their specialties. International Bistro for the review, the Jerk Calamari. He found it a for leftovers." George Cord those and comment- They're and complement and off we went to another fun spicy for an appetizer, but was satis- leftovers home, savoury

how the meal tasted the excellent blends of coffee avail- afternoon lunch. fied with the portion he received. ed on good able. Don't confuse this restaurant Fran and George both enjoyed it as even after reheating! Villa Nina offers — We that with Casa Nina; Villa Nina is located well. Now for a surprise: George Joel opted for the Raznjici agree relaxed atmos- food and a at 120 Ottawa Street North, just had the mussels. They were served marinated pork tenderloin on a good is little and served with phere. The place a expensive west of Highway 86 in a small plaza. in a simple wine garlic sauce skewer, grilled vegeta- Hard lunch, but the bles. The meat ten- for This restaurant is not your average which was very good. was incredibly your average it. The flavour. quality of the food is worth eatery. It is more upscale than most We've got to mention Villa Ninas der, with a mellow smoky AARON HUNTER bread. Joel recommends this dish service was not bad, but we were places, but you will need more than trademark garlic According strongly This be issue Cord Entertainment oil, and for those who meat. not in a hurry. may an an hour for lunch. Nevertheless, the to Fran, "...the warm buns, appreciate good lunch. if looking for a food is worth both the wait and the baked garlic at the tables. Wow! George tried the Indonesian you're quick

to Fran for us I.Tom Cochran* idea in this Chicken which was served in Our thanks joining plays lulu's, price. Not a good to indulge Sate, lunch. Villa Mar. a if bed of banana bas- for a fun and enjoyable The restaurant is ornately deco- garlic/oil fest your dinner compan- skewers over a

for a The circle ofrock is the if mati rice. the chicken was Nina's is the perfect suggestion complete; rated with hand painted murals on ions are non-garlic types, or you Although universe unfolds. after the of this dish relaxing and satisfying meal the walls and ceiling. Everything are heading off to a meeting excellent, highlight 2. House-hunting, Where to Hang! Ifyou're done, serewyou. HUni $*Tllfi 3. Election aftermath. Monday, March 7 No mere fanny posters. No more

• Pig Skin plays at WilPs glamour. Just candy wrappers ballots March 11 Student • Sandbox plays at the and co-op blowing sadly Bombshelter down the street . . .

4. The I>est before' n:oo-3:oo * • Gandharvas plus Tristan Psionic conspiracy, at the Volcano MHk keeps forever. You've Travel are just got be... March 8 to tough* in the Concourse -T9 Fashion s.The video for 55 112 •Cadence Show Smashing in the Theatre Auditorium, Bp.m. Pumpkins' "1979*. Talk: on a • I I'd have been the Europe Budget . . Daleman at Wilfs 9 Rob plays guess pre« Hh An amazing to get opportunity haw ?-?n • Katrina Maugham Jazz Ensemble schooler these guys would first hand information from: beat the of and thrown grooves at Mrs. Robinson's in crap out in the Library in Kitchener a garbage can. L 126 _Room . student Work Abroad March 9 6. Blue Dog Bagels.

_ 1 •Cadence in the TA, 8 p.m. thoroughly anjoyed my pizza

• Comedy Night with mainliner bagel Noreally, i

WML • Greyhound Mrs. Robinson's IfyouVe gotit, screw you.

• Video release Russ 'Faster Babe! Kill! more! Groove Daddies 8. Meyer's and WLUSU ■ ...and many Kiltf the Princess 11-13. bash and the Miniatures are at at Mat

the Volcano Don't ntiss these iarger-than-Hfe,

March 13 hard-drinking, fast-driving, mur-

• Mike Mandel does his wacky hyp- derous, go-go dancing farm ani-

notizing thing in the Turret mals who karate chop their way ofvio- March 15 across the desertm search

• Wilfrid Laurier Chapel Choir and lentkicks. Oh, and they talk. the Wilfrid Laurier Baroque Orchestra 9. Preparation for cadence,

present Solomon: Handel's Great laurier fashion show.

Oratorio in the Maureen No. they're not dancing around in

at because Forrester Recital Hall 8 pjm. the concourse just

Waaay into thefuture... they'rehappy. Mar25 10. The Birdcage

• that like a Laurier Jazz Cabaret is happenin' Go on, butter toast

in the Turret roan.

112 ftRAPUATION PHOTOS'

ILOOK WHAT YOU SET FOR

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[evergreen PLAZA (Westmount & Highland)

16 March 6,1996 theCord -Entertainment)

ear candy ear candy

thought I'd check it out, When eveiything is number. The rest of the songs seem to warning. This CD does not contain the cover

said and done. Hard Drive is a pretty good include similar guitar work and keyboard of 'You Oughta Know"; instead, Che bidden the disc. Stone combines some alternative programming with some surprises in track is a Paul McCartney song, "Jet".

to sounds (which made me think of tasty 80's middle like saxophmies and the occasional Listening this album, you can't help

with is chops), no excuses rock, as well as hip-hop beat This by no means an amaz- thinking these guys are a one-hit wonder.

hlues to diverse album. butit does its moments. This album is some produce a ingalbum, have not terrible, i&just very aver- ofhis There Js a grand sound to some songs, Sean Moore age. For every decent song that raises your

as horns, flutes, cellos, and violins make hopes, there's one to crush them. The band

Eye Rhyme appearances in various tracks. Hard Drive mainly gets into trouble with the longer lead the life Control is by insanely catchy "Things songs, which in this case means anything

LW.G. Denied" a tune that has almost bt*>n worn over two minutes. The 1000 Mona Lisas

of off the disc from of If life Control is the conclusion a year's my frequentplaying it can play hard and fast for those two min-

workofeffort for the WLU band Eye Rhyme. a video is in the works for this track, then utes, but alter that they blow aB their ener-

of die to it Much Music fair This CD is done in the vein 70's pro- prepare see on a gy, 1 will give them credit for one of the

rock albums a with - the more titles I've heard: gressive by telling story amount song just doesntletyou forget interesting song ever it is with Also "Oldest is bal- Td Rather Die Have You". its music, a concept album and its Us chorus. Myth" a nice Than to Touch the of kid the tracks Lisas advice them ntae songs, it tells story a street lad, and "Slipped Right 1000 Mona My to is to stick to covering of disease fighting druglords in the back alleys a Through," and "Wonder" are both keepers. new Alanis songs. Maybe a cover of "Too Hot" is While of did After large city As you listen to the music, it% like the rest the album notjump out getting a breakthrough hit with their in order. Dont'ya think?

a TV screen has been turned on In your at me, was fun to listen to. The biggest cover of the *Aianis Morissetle* song "You Tom Hrubes

head, transporting you to the mean streets problem with this disc is that it sounds like a Oughta Know". 1000 Mona Lisas have;

portrayed in this tale. Bye Rhyme's influ- debut effort; while still professional, Hard released their first M-length CD. First a of the little loose. Stone has ences are some great Canadian Drive does sound a Mr.

bands like Hush, Yes, and Saga, life Control come out with a solid first effort, and it will

even boasts a guest appearance by Saga's be interesting to see what he comes up with

lan Chrichlon. Eye Rhyme believes they next

;

can bring back progressive rock, but are Conor McCreery -

finding that many believe they are "outdat- w?

: ed" for today's music industry. I believe that

ifanyone can bring this style of music back.

Eye Rhyme can. With their mastery of instruments, to the lead vocalist's voice, Eye

■"■ Rhyme is progressive rock at its best but

with a 90s twist Give them a try, They're

appearing at Wflfs as Fig Skin on Mar 8,

and it promises to be a Wast. At their live

shows they use lighting and special effects

to help teß the story — you'll have to see it believe. make Self to If you can't their show

•— "Subliminal Plastic BHBi then try life Control you wont he disap- Motives* pointed. Zoo/BMC/Spongebath

Mike Vested in Every once a white it's nice to get a pleas- HWH ant surprise when you pick up a lesser-

known recording, Self are a duo who com-

bine hard driving guitar power chords with

synthesized beats and keyboards. This com-

bination of sounds produces ahybrid music that is hard to label. Their first single, "CanonVis quite misleading to hear. It &

nineties with some keyboards thrown In. ArthurWilliam Stone However, the rest of the album seems to Hard Drive stray from this sound. "So Low" begins jaHKjl Microcosm records with some acoustic guitar work, then

Hard Drive is die album from Arthur charges into an energetic rock anthem. William -and Stone, since It has been doing "Big important Nothing" is interesting too

well the I reasonably (sales-wise) In GTA, because it could almost be labeled a jazz

TNT Fun with

DearturtlesTNT, andspurs

I have had many orgasms in the past, howev- Dear TNT, er current has my boyfriend never gotten me My girlfriend is really into dress-up and theme to reach true sexual pleasure. He is very dull sex. Is this normal? How can I entertain her and in boring bed, is always on top, and uses interests without feeling ridiculous.? the same and movements over over again as if Signed, he were of record. some sort broken Having Mr. Dress-up sex with him is about as exciting as doing a turtle. DearMr. Dress-up,

First Signed, ofall, in a comfortable, healthy relation- *lME£j|jj^: Bored in Bed ship, every desire (no matter how different it

¥ may seem) is important. Theme sex is very Dear :P^WBWBWWBilP^^^^^^^^^^wWi^PWWWMMii^^^B Bored in Bed, common, in fact it can be quite enjoyable with

We are very curious as to how are aware the We you right outfit. suggest playing a patriotic of what it is like to in sexual inter- engage game. As Canadians, our personal favourite course with a turtle! However, to help you is Beave-Her-Tail. Material needed for this solve do have your problem, we afew consists dice and two wetsuits; 3 ,'■■■■. •• sugges- game of if tions. It is time take control. Most for you to you're into that kind of thing. Roll the dice — / men / enjoy being submissive, and we are even numbers mean go down underand don't almost certain will it the you enjoy cowgirl style. forget snorkel. Oxygen packs are some- So get out on that hat, your spurs, put and times neededfor those longer trips to the great ride him like the bull that he should be. To wide On odd build open. numbers, up a dam increase speed, in the occasional You have pop quarter. have got to a big enough logfor this But don't ride him bareback — make he sure one, because beavers sometimes like to nibble is hat wearing a too. at their wood

TNT TNT mm

theCord March 6, 1996 17 CLASSIFIEDS

$BQAvk. Call 888-9241. house rent. Forsstu- lease. Special Incredible Signing pool. Ijl/rtiif-n.#! leave in the summer months). Furnished for House is well Call wanted Please call Patti at 742-2788. dents, 2 bathrooms, rec and laundry Bonus. kept.

at the One - 3 bedroom, equipped 10 walk from WLU. soon as special offer expires kitchen, Volunteer work look great on a rooms, mins Mark 574- free and end of James or laundry $325 Wanted: 3 bedroom sublet for Sept. resume. Excellent condition. Garage May. facilities/marking.

2064 241-2985. per person per month. Utilities - month util- or 96 Dec 96. Must be walking dis- parking. $1400 per plus pager included in rent. 1 lease tance to WLU. Please Call Christine F itics. Available Sept 1, call 746-7928 year May i-y* nAnf Call 10l KClll 5 bedroom house in Great 1/96. 416-491-1370 or Jenn at 725-2384 or Erin at after 6 p.m.

close to 884-0083 Condition, everything, Beer bedroom Grocery Store, Variety Store, Furnished house for Rent Available Two rooms in a four Afin/\| coin house. Store, Etc. Washer/Dryer (not f\J ||HJUIKXSIIKSI SOCCER May 1, for one year. 6 bedrooms, 2 Females Preferred. Big yard, H

Call Gas Heated House. Coaches and assistant coaches are kitchens, 2 bathrooms, living, laun- parking, AC, Laundry Craig for operated). reasonable rent. needed for in all 10 minutes from information - 747-3925. Bills, Very Travelling this summer orafter teams age groups, dry rooms, extras, mor Cheap gradua-

about WLU - April. Call Joe Days: 888- tion? Travel Cuts is For more information, these $1500 per month plus utili- may sponsoring a Student

106 4567 ex. 5693 or Evenings: 742- on volunteer positions, please call ties. 746-7928. House for rent: 243 Hemlock 8t Travel Show Monday March 11 in the

from 11:00- Waterloo Minor Soccer at 578-9680. Columbia, 58t 4 Bedroom, Laundry 9562. Concourse 3:00. The show

beautiful house Qose to features a talk on to Room available in Facilities, Universities, $325 travelling Europe on Sublet: 3 subletters needed $28Qfroom. 12 month lease Summer a held at 2:30 in Room Ll26in ROOF, an agency working with with 4 other girls. King St near & May Budget 5 - facilities, street youth is looking for depend- Laurier. May 1. Call 888-0258 - April, Sept - Aug. Call Chris 1-800- modern house, great the library. Admission is free. min walk from WLU. $ 15Q/month able, empathetic and open minded 844-7906 or Craig 747-3925.

St. Call 886-1660. volunteers. ROOF provides excel- 5 bedroom house on King near (negotiable)

Available 3 bedroom house for lent training opportunities in group Laurier. May 1. Two rent laundry, Aff/tivwi

for rent - 5 bedrooms, avail- work, front-line client interaction, washrooms and laundry parling, just steps to University, May House \#lTwi'6C] 1 Great laundry, outreach & crisis intervention. If $1550/ month 888-0258. to May lease Utilities included, call able May location, 1- at or must be seen! $275/month each. Kitchener-Waterloo you are interested in the helping James or Mark 574-2064 Sexual Assault

241-2985. Incredible 905-735-7846 for more info. Centre will be profession, this is the experience for House for rent. 5 bedrooms, 2 Pager Special Support running a

bonus in for women survivors of you. We require both day and kitchens, 2 baths, 2 living rooms, signing effect. group sexu-

Furnished rooms available in family violence thatwill evening time volunteers, and ask for central vac, 10 min. walk to WLU, al promote relax-

Shawn @ 1-416- 5 house will rent to home close to Ave. and a once a week, eight month commit- $1400/month, Call bedroom but University ation, self awareness/body, provide

for students who of4or 5 bus route, private yard with ofrelaxation ment (flexible 256-7063 groups people. May to May large practice techniques and provide members with skills

outside of they can use the group. It

will be a five week group meeting

once a week starting April 11,1996

until May 9,1996 from 1:30 - 3:00

cost p.m. There is no and registra-

tion is limited. Please call Laurie-

Ann or Leslie ifinterested at

Chris's house cleaning service,

i weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly.

Reliable, fast, and productive ser-

vice. Flexible hours. $11:0(Vhr. 571-

Editing, Wordprocessing and desk-

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freelance » ' rates. 748-2838.

SummerJobs

Applications are now being accept-

ed for summer jobs on cruise ships,

airlines, and resorts. No experience

For more information

send $2 and a self-addressed

stamped envelope to: I[ World Wide Travel dub 6021 Suite 1040 i Young Street,

Toronto, Ontario M2M 3W2

Full time undergrads,

B 4th to ———Ist through year, needed par-

• ticipate in a short telephone survey. g _ J_V_ .J ~ JL JLItIJI for chance to kjOlllC OX iXIIS S Must complete survey

most minds are inCanada's Zm^Kx^uTsS- insurance industry. 5364

students kinds of Enthusiastic, hard-working They're the minds that know creativity educated, experienced and ethical group of

far literature movies. successful needed as sales represen- goes beyond art, or making professionals equipped to pursue painters, not national If you're like that, why consider a career with careers at the local, provincial, or even tatives and crew chiefs in Kitchener Canada's property/casualty, or general insurance international level. Works Cambridge Call Student industry? The industry offers a wide variety of Choice, challenge, satisfaction and „ security. . . p 1 ainung at D /b-oD U. career choices for creative minds. Accountants They are just some ofthe rewards you'll enjoy but also yes, systems analysts, lawyers, managers, through a creative career in the property/casualty

loss investment insurance from home! prevention engineers, specialists, industry. Earn up to 20/hours

investigators, marineunderwriters, aviation For more information, look for local details your Limited positions. For free and The choice is Insurance Institute in more. the white . J adjusters many yours. pages or, contact , lf imrwv Pnve- rusn sell aaaressea pew General insurance is also an industry that Les Dandridge, BA, A.1.1.C., at The Insurance levels to: Money Co. 72 melDOUni encourages you to acquire its own of Institute ofCanada, 18 King Street East, lope As Fellow Associate of 6th ONT M6K professionalism. a or The Floor, Toronto, Ontario, MSC IC4 ave. Unit 11, Toronto,

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- Roadhouse style sammys garage The TheInsurance of Graduates of Institute Canada. down- Bar/Nightclub opening soon

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the Moon Salon. in person. Howl at thursday 325 King St. W. Kitchener,

- march 7, Friday march 8, 2p.m.

6p.m.

18 February 28, 1996 theCord NEU STUDENTEN KUNST

Without Site-ings It was #fateflles

04.02.96 05:48:22

Eyes: Heavy Feathers Meat: Aching Brain: Firing

Thought: Ah...this 1s life!

Connected: sel®ppp34.lonllne.net

"Just when 1t seemd [sic] Spring was finally here, the brutal zephyr Connected for: 7:48:32h

Winter has returned to blanket the City 1n a sheet of melancholy." I Flatland: mIRC v2.58 ehanced with KlttyKll v1.5

found the above quote carved Into the back of a bus seat last week. It /nick: gorfelgug

struck me at the time as slightly pretentious, but an apt reflection Channels: #oplum #fateflles

madman Winter his who nice 1t 15... of mine own feelings. As begins final March, Thought: Ah. fateflles, how

solace? find here. doth not yearn for Spring's sunny Msg: Hey man, thought I'd you Command: /msg grazzt Where else? Heheheh.

Msg: Ox nl32KBn This file 1s for gorfelgug only!

Thoughts: Hunh?

Having allowed Franz to continue with his 9-week yoga course at the Msg: gorfelgug: download this file now...

Waterloo Recreational Complex, I find myself 1n a vulnerable position, Commnad: /msg Mr.J-dcc xdcc send #1

the Franz File open to exploitation. Taking yoga as a precedent, promptly Receiving:

enrolled In a wall-climbing program at the YMCA, volunteered at a food Transfer: Complete

bank, signed up with a weekly bowling team, and 1s contemplating Msg: Mr.J-dcc has quit IRC (Heed my words)

becoming a Blg Brother. Thoughts: Scary guy, I'll have to check out that file...later.

that I approached him about these extra-curricular activities and asked Msg: What was all about? Who was that guy?

1f they might not Interfere with his work. Secretly, I wondered 1f he Command: /msg grazzt I dunno. I dunno.

be to avoid with which 1s This does bode might not trying spending time me, required Thoughts: not we11...

for the bulk of his responsibilities. He has also been making subtle

inquiries concerning my financial status, something he has not done Anonymous

since school began.

"Meln Herr," he explained, "You told me last Fall our return to WLU

1n order for to conduct research for Your was you a writing project. risk writers: past submissions are subsequent descent from idle wealth to the destitution of student life sfilLup, nei& ftTtna cord offices in is thus explained. Out of loyalty alone, I have suffered the indigni-

thrust me the necessities of this I on mv folder, its me manma ties upon by arrangement. sleep Dig enve- floormat. I enter and exit the fire- a your squalid apartment through lope. pnon and.get your aTready- escape so as not to alert the landlord to the fact that two people

live here. I've lost all and I think the television has because irfere s no my hair, some- rims, telling do with that." thing to wnafs gonna nappen to mem mis "Nonsense," I interjected, then Hed, "Philip 1s safe, I assure m you." s u m e r

not "Regardless, Herr Anton, many things do add up."

"Like what?" I knew very well on how flimsy a base my facade was andrew white constructed. I half him to expected expose my poverty, resign and walk

out of my life forever. I also half expected him to strip

■ _j

down and shower himself with whipped cream, but I sup-

that pressed half, as usual. 'Helena BonhamCarter^^^^^^MiHiii'ilitlil'riltta^ "I have not write seen you more than a page a week, ■ ...a stunning performance." "TH[ PSYCHOKILLffI-jAILBAIT-MKEII-COWIIOY- since we arrived at WLU." |

Oh, yes, I thought. Without Feathers. " gMOTo,Hn°N'wMmffuaof,9% I need "Maybe you more time alone to work on your writing "￿￿￿?! mein Herr. That's the I've taken project, reason up so many outside activities. It's that not I despise you as the

worst..."

"That's enough, Franz," I said. "I see your point. Fine,

go out on your own to these activities. Just don't neglect duties. And your another thing..." But he was out the win-

dow before I finished the thought.

I must I semblance admit, am losing a of control over my manservant. If only American Gothic were still on TV to provide guidance.

Anton Volcansek

Check film for exact showtimes! nocuc CDIHAV uxoru Q»UI guides urcNj i-kivat maKin »in. Fnm Cuides Avai |ab | in wiifs student nfo Booth e & | . Until March 17th Dreams Plays Nightly one block southof Bridgeport& king in uptown. 6 Princess st. w« Waterloo 885-2950

Dreams can be happy,

Dreams be can scary

What are dreams?

Why do they make us scared

of what's not going to happen? Dreams are there to give us

something to think about while we are

sleeping.

I get dreams that are not nice

to see.

I feel like there 1s nobody there.

I'm of do thinking things to 1f I can't go back to sleep.

Other people can do 1t too. Dreams are there to keep you EipireTjVnjl/BB company

while you sleep. A&/ LARGESTSELECTIfINinKW " Mm Anonymous V N. KING ST. N., WAT. 884-7376 (Special to the Cord) t/QfflA JP4O2 \ (BETWEEN HARVEY'S AND BURGER KING)

STANLEY PARK MALI. 748-0912

theCord March 6,1996 19 j|Si