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Home , Kindness, Reverence (emotion)

Harmony in

Understanding Relationship – in the Family

1. Relationship is – between one self (I1) and other self (I2)

2. There are in relationship – in one self (I1) for other self (I2) 3. These feelings can be recognized – they are definite (9 Feelings) 4. Their fulfilment, evaluation leads to mutual

Feelings in relationship: 1- 6- J)k fo”okl FOUNDATION 2- lEeku Respect 7- Glory xkSjo 3- Lusg 8- —rKrk 4- eerk 9- izse Care COMPLETE VALUE 5- Guidance okRlY;

2 Affection (Lusg) The of being related to the other ( of the other as one’s relative, the other is like me) nwljs dks laca/kh ds :i esa Lohdkjus dk HkkoA fufoZj®f/krkA

One naturally feels related to the other when one has the feelings of Trust and Respect in oneself for the other

Responsibility and commitment for mutual fulfilment

Absence of Affection = Opposition,

3 Care (eerk) Guidance (okRlY;) Feeling of responsibility toward the Feeling of responsibility toward body of my relative the self(I) of my relative

The responsibility & commitment The responsibility & commitment for nurturing and protection for ensuring Right the Body of my relative Understanding and Right Feeling in the self(I) of my relative laca/kh dks le>nkj o ftEesnkj cukus laca/kh ds “kjhj ds iks’k.k] laj{k.k dh LohÑfr dk HkkoA dh LohÑfr dk HkkoA

Care & Guidance naturally follow Affection

Are you ensuring both – care as well as guidance? Or mostly focused on care? While taking care of the body, are you also concerned about the self? Eg. While feeding the child

4 Reverence (J)k) The feeling of acceptance for Excellence Js’Brk dh LohÑfr dk HkkoA

Excellence ¼Js’Brk½ at all 4 levels Understanding Harmony & 1. In the Self, as an Individual Living in Harmony 2. In Family 3. In Society 4. In Nature/

Excellence and competition are not similar. In excellence, one helps to bring the other to his level In competition, he hinders the other from reaching to his level

Worship ¼iwtk½ Effort made to achieve excellence. Js’Brk ds fy, fd;k x;k iz;klA (inspiration from the revered)

5 Working for Excellence Competing to be Special The other is like me – Not other – only me we are complementary I am different/more than the other Helps the other to come to his level Stops the other to come to his level - effort to accentuate the difference, to dominate, manipulate, exploit Operates on the basis of his Natural Operates on the basis of his Acceptance (that is definite) – preconditioning (that changes) – swatantra, self driven by clarity of driven by other on the basis of human purpose reward / of punishment Trust, respect... In relationship Conditional relationship, over- evaluation of self & under- evaluation of other

Is Prosperous – Rightly Utililises, Is Deprived – Hoards, Accumulates, Shares, Nurtures Exploits Absolute (definite completion point) Relative (no definite completion point) 7 Excellence (Js"Brk) To Be Special (fo'ks"krk) The other is like me – we are Not other – me complementary I am different from the other Rights – Happiness, Prosperity  Rights – Happiness, Prosperity  Continuity Continuity Goals – 4 Human Goals Goals – Accumulation of Physical Facility, maximisation of sensation…

Responsibility – To understand Responsibility – ? harmony & to live in harmony at all levels of being

Self development Self Development – ?

Development of Other

8 Glory ¼xkSjo½ Gratitude ¼d`rKrk½ Feeling for those who have made Feeling for those who have made or are making effort for or are making effort for my excellence excellence ftUgksaus Js’Brk ds fy, fd, iz;kl ftUgksaus esjh Js’Brk ds fy, iz;kl fd;k fd;k gS] muds izfr HkkoA gS] muds izfr HkkoA

Gratitude is significant in the development of relationship

10 Feeling in Relationship 1- 6- J)k Trust fo”okl FOUNDATION VALUE Reverence 2- lEeku Respect 7- Glory xkSjo 3- Lusg Affection 8- Gratitude —rKrk 4- eerk 9- izse Care Love COMPLETE VALUE 5- Guidance okRlY;

12 Verify on the basis of your natural acceptance if you want to be related to: X None  The feeling of being related to none – in opposition to all √ One The feeling of being related to one The feeling of being related to many Affection √ Many √ Everyone  The feeling of being related to all Love

Affection (Lusg) – The feeling of being related to the other (acceptance of the other as one’s relative) nwljs dks laca/kh ds :i esa Lohdkjus dk HkkoA

Love ¼izse½ – The feeling of being related to all (Complete Value) ¾ gj ,d dks laca/kh ds :i esa Lohdkjus dk HkkoA

13 Love ¼izse½ Love ¼izse½ – The feeling of being related to all (Complete Value) ¾ gj ,d dks laca/kh ds :i esa Lohdkjus dk HkkoA ¾ iw.kZrk esa jfr & iw.kZrk esa jr gksuk & gj ,d ds lkFk laca/k esa fufgr jl Hkkoksa dh vuqHkwfr djukA

It all starts with identifying that one is related to other human being (Affection - Lusg) and it slowly expands to the feeling of being related to all human beings and then to all, each & every unit in nature (human being as well as other units) (Love - izse) ,d → vusd → gj ,d dks laca/kh ds :i esa Lohdkjuk

Feeling of Love is expressed in the form of n;k , beneficience —ik & d#.kk . The feeling is for all, and it is expressed to those in contact

The feeling of Love is the foundation of Undivided Society

16 Check for yourself – In relationship, what is the priority of right understanding & right feelings (needs of self(I)) of physical facility (needs of body)

What is the role of physical facility in the fulfillment of right feelings?

In relationship, where would you start: 1. Expect right feelings from the other 2. Take responsibility to understand relationship, ensure right feelings in yourself and express them to the other

20 Established Value Expressed Value LFkkfir ewY; f”k"V ewY; lkStU;rk Trust fo”okl Complimentariness vknj Respect lEeku Compliance Lusg Affection Commitment ] fu’Bk mnkjrk Care eerk Generosity lgtrk Guidance okRlY; Spontaneity iwT;rk Reverence J)k Obedience xkSjo Glory Simplicity ljyrk rKrk lkSE;rk Gratitude — Softness Love izse Oneness vuU;rk

26 Harmony in Family – Justice, From Family to World Family (Undivided Society)

1. Relationship is – between one self (I1) and other self (I2) 2. There are feelings in relationship – in one self (I1) for other self (I2) 3. These feelings can be recognized – they are definite (9 Feelings) 4. Their fulfilment, evaluation leads to mutual happiness Feelings in relationship: 1- 6- J)k Trust fo”okl FOUNDATION VALUE Reverence 2- lEeku Respect 7- Glory xkSjo 3- Lusg Affection 8- Gratitude —rKrk 4- eerk 9- izse Care Love COMPLETE VALUE 5- Guidance okRlY;

Justice = Recognition, Fulfillment & Evaluation of Human-Human Relationship, leading to Mutual Happiness

Justice  from Family to World Family  Undivided Society ¼v[k.M lekt½

28 Harmony in Family – Justice, From Family to World Family (Undivided Society)

1. Relationship is (it already exists – we just need to realise it) –

between one self (I1) and other self (I2)

2. The base of relationship is feelings – in one self (I1) for other self (I2)

3. These feelings are definite (9 Feelings) – they can be understood

4. Justice in relationship is understanding relationship, acceptance of relationship, having the right feelings, expressing these feelings, right evaluation of these feelings leading to mutual happiness Having the right understanding & right feeling in myself leads to my happiness Expressing (sharing) these feelings to the other & it’s right evaluation by the other leads to his/her happiness

Justice  from Family to World Family  Undivided Society ¼v[k.M lekt½

29 Justice Recognition, Fulfillment & Evaluation of Human-Human Relationship, leading to Mutual Happiness E12: Evaluation by 1 of 2 Necessary condition E11 = E21 Self1 Self2 E22 = E12 E11 E22 E21: Evaluation by 2 of 1 Complete condition E11, E12, E22, E21 are Naturally Acceptable to both 1 & 2

E11 – I have a feeling of opposition E21 – He is opposed to me E11 = E21, but not NA to either 1 or 2 Ghatna se doosre ki sahaj sweekriti nahin dikhti (keval karna dikhta hai)

Domination – not giving other the option to share his evaluation about you 30 Sum Up: 9 Feelings Trust fo”okl To be assured that the other intends my happiness & Foundation Value vk/kkj ewY; prosperity Respect lEeku Right evaluation (with the basis that the other is like me and we are complementary to each other) Affection Lusg Acceptance of the other as one’s relative Care eerk Responsibility & commitment for nurturing and protecting the body of one’s relative Guidance okRlY; Responsibility & commitment for ensuring Right Understanding and Right Feeling in the self (I) of one’s relative Reverence J)k Acceptance for Excellence Glory xkSjo Acceptance for those who have made effort for Excellence Gratitude —rKrk Acceptance for those who have made effort for my Excellence Love izse The feeling of being related to all Complete Value iw.kZ ewY;

31 Role of Education To ensure the Right Understanding to live with Justice in every relationship fulfilling all the values in relationship

Justice  from Family to World Family  Undivided Society ¼v[k.M lekt½

32 Role of Education Human RIGHT UNDERSTANDING 1 ekuo psruk in the Self – Understanding Harmony in Individual, Family, Society, Nature/Existence

2 JUSTICE in 3 PARTICIPATION in RELATIONSHIP LARGER ORDER with Human with Nature Being - From Family - from Family to Order to World World Family Family Order

MUTUAL HAPPINESS FULFILMENT of HUMAN GOAL UNDIVIDED SOCIETY UNIVERSAL HUMAN ORDER 33 Human Tradition

Conduct that ensures Human continuity of mutual Conduct happiness & vkpj.k prosperity Education that ensures the development of the competence to live with Human Human Definite Constitution Human Education Human Nature of Tradition Conduct society Entry Point of people living together in a relationship of mutual fulfillment Universal Human Order The society in which Human Goal is realised

34 Home Work 1. Reflect on your assumptions about each of the 9 feelings. Study the proposals about each of the 9 feelings

2. Are you making effort for getting feelings from others or for ensuring the feelings in yourself?

3. What is the role of physical facility in the fulfillment of relationship?

4. Are you working for excellence or for being special / domination? What are your underlying assumptions about happiness and about relationship?

5. Is love about sensation or about feeling in relationship?

6. Where would you like to draw the line between people who are related to you and people who are not related to you?

7. Is justice served in a courtroom or is to be ensured in family?

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