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I. TWO NEWS-MAKING EVENTS sion, this service was to al mix of partic­ include a Torah read­ ipants was wo recent events triggered an ing by the celebrant. In noted: women unusual amount of attention on an aln1ost unanimous with head cover­ TOrthodox feminism in its various vote (with two dissen­ ings, women in expressions. Reportage and commentary sions and three absten­ jeans, women in were forthcoming in all sorts of journals, tions), the rabbis said both ... spanning ranging from The New York Times and that "such an endeavor is three genera- the Jerusalem Post to The Jewish Week halachically prohibited." (Their tions, some­ and The Village Voice. Along the way, a decision was clearly based on precedent times number of issues were touched upon - set by lead- the validity of the feminist agenda, the ing authori- timelessness of Torah, the capacity for ties, including Rabbi Moshe Fein­ compassion on the part of male religious stein and Rabbi ). B. Soloveichik error within the leadership, and the strength of rab­ ;i~i~7.More on that later.) same family, each attending for reasons, binical authority. And these, in turn) The uproar that followed included an wishes, and hopes of their own. While relate to basic principles of Judaism. outpouring of conden1nation and sym­ the journalists covering the event may The first event was an extraordinary pathy - the former against the Vaad, have focused on this or that sound-bite meeting of the Vaad Harabbonim of the latter for the women. Some eleven or comment, an overwhelming concern Queens on January 12, where the Vaad Modern Orthodox Rabbis, including hovered in the air throughout the pro­ issued a p'sak that women's prayer Rabbis Marc Angel, Saul Berman, Irv­ ceedings, a concern that should also be groups• are outside the pale of accept­ ing Greenberg, Haskel Lookstein, addressed to those backing the women's able practice. This meeting, with close to Emanuel Rackman, and Avi Weiss, prayer group in Hillcrest: 50 rabbis in attendance, was convened issued a letter, voicing their support of It is basic to tenets of Judaism that at the request of the administrator of the wo1nen's prayer groups, and decrying both the Written Torah and the Oral Yeshiva of Central Queens because a the Vaad's interference in an area of Law emanate from Sinai. Taught by G-d number of school's students were invit­ jurisdiction of the Rav of the specific to Moshe, both aspects of the Torah are ed to a women's prayer group that had synagogue. immutable. (See Rambam, Thirteen been scheduled to be held in conjunc­ Much of the English-language Jew­ Principles of Faith, Introduction to tion with an Orthodox congregation in ish press decried the rabbinical decision Perek Cheilek, Sanhedrin: Principles 8, Hillcrest in honor of a fellow student's as being "political," "mischievous" and 9.) As new situations and circum­ bat mitzva. And according to the invi­ insensitive. (None of them, by the way, stances arise, the eternal voice of Torah tations that were mailed out for the occa- deemed it inappropriate for rabbis speaks to us, and guides us - the voice from Manhattan, Riverdale, and Ramal of Torah as understood and applied by The article was written by Rabbi Nisson Wolpin, editor of The Jewish Observer, with Levi Reisman, Gan to offer invasive comment on an men who are totally immersed in Torah an accountant and lawyer who practices in New issue in a jurisdiction not theirs). All in study, in command of its wisdom and York City. all, it set the stage for the event that fol­ values, in keeping with the Mesorah (tra­ 1. Note should be made that girls daven together as lowed: what was billed as the first-ever dition) they have received. This is so all­ a matter of course in schools and summer camps, International Conference on Feminism inclusive that should a Jew say that "I but not as the preferred choice over davening behind and Orthodoxy. accept all that I've been taught in the the mechitza with a halachic minyan. At this two-day conclave, an unusu- Torah, except for one particular for-

8 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 mulation (a kal vechomer, or a fortiori who wrote the groundbreaking book On 20, '97) as being set "to become the first proof), which I reject," he is considered Women and Judaism: A View From Tra­ woman to receive ordination as an an apikorus, and outside the fold. (See dition:' (This book was subject of a Orthodox rabbi," accompanied by a pic­ Sanhedrin 99a.) review article, "Some Unorthodox ture of Ms. Ner-David in tallis and tefill­ By contrast, there are those who claim Reflections on Torah Feminism and in. In 1993, Ms. Ner-David, then known to respect Torah and its mitzvos, yet they Torah;' by Sori Tropper, JO June '84.) as Haviva Krasner-Davidson, had expect Torah values and the manner in While she admittedly would have want­ applied to the rabbinical program at which mitzvos are performed to adjust ed to organize such a conference in the Yeshiva University. Her application was to changing social conditions, and to 80's, the time was not ripe. Yet even a never acknowledged or replied to. reflect new insights that may appear to dozen years ago she maintained - as Unable to attend the YU program, arise. While those who espouse such an she declared again quite strongly-"If and unwilling to become a Conservative approach may call themselves Orthodox, there's a rabbinic will there's a halachic rabbi by studying at the Jewish Theo­ acceptance of an evolving halacha is way;' as if the men of the rabbinate can logical Seminary, Ms. Krasner-Davidson actually an embracing of the doctrine - and, indeed do - manipulate moved to Eretz Yisroel and found a rabbi of Reform, albeit in a less conspicuous halacha at will. And the only reason (Aryeh Strikovsky, identified as "a manner) similar to the Conservative "much needed changes" in such areas as Jerusalem educator and former RIETS Judaism of mid-century America. male- dominance in administering a get student") willing to teach and "ordain" The question then is: Did the Femi­ (bill of divorce) have not been intro­ her if she acquired the requisite knowl­ nism and Orthodoxy Conference reflect duced, she has argued, is because there's edge. sensitivity to Torah values or was it been no rabbinic will - totally ignor­ Incidentally, the second article in something else under an Orthodox ing the fact that get procedures are of Moment '93 was by the same Haviva flag? Torah origin. Krasner-Davidson. Entitled "Why I am There surely were women present at Closer on the horizon, in Ms. Green­ applying to Yeshiva U;' the article this Convention who represented the full berg's view, is the prospect of women details her reasons for wanting to be an spectrum of possibilities. Indeed, one is Orthodox rabbis. Actually, the sugges­ Orthodox rabbi. at loss to find one hue with which to tion of a woman Orthodox rabbi should In this article, Ms. Krasner-Davidson brush them all. Some women surely not be surprising. In its December 1993 revealed that in addition to applying to came with tl1e sole intent of enhancing issue, Moment magazine had featured Yeshiva University, she was also apply­ their spirituality, while others- unde­ two articles on the subject, highlighted ing to the Jewish Theological Seminary. niably- found in Orthodox Judaism by a cover photo of a woman in tallis She confessed to being"torn between the a convenient canvas on which to paint and tefillin (worn neatly below the hair­ ideologies of the Orthodox and Con­ their feminist aspirations. line) with the provocative question: "The servative movements." She stated: Two aspects of the conclave) howev­ New Face of Orthodox Rabbis?" One I agree with JTS's stated belief in the er, can speak most clearly in character­ article, by Blu Greenberg, argues that the importance of the evolution of the izing the basic thrust of the gathering: time had indeed come. Moreover, while halacha, but I take issue with some of its leadership, and the statements that she's at it, she is shockingly articulate in the seminary's halachic stances .... I it made - both at the sessions and in her repudiation of the Divine origin of am frustrated by the Orthodox move­ other forums'. It would seem to be fair the Oral Torah: ment's belief in the idea that halacha to all concerned to let the leaders and ... Halachic issues of mechitzah, of should stagnate at this point in Jew­ their words speak for the event. minyan and aliyot, of ffmale witness­ ish history, that rabbis today have no es in Jewish courts of law, of kol isha authority to change halacha. I do not II. OF SPOKESPERSONS AND -will have to be looked at again .... The advocate overturning halacha to con­ SOUND BITES first step is the ordination of women. form to fads or disintegrating social From there, We shall see where to go mores; rather I strongly believe that he conference was chaired by Blu next. rabbis should incorporate such indis­ Greenberg, who is identified Before even .contemplating the next putably positive social developments T(Jewish Week, Jan. 31, '97) as "a step, how does this agenda fit with the such as democracy, the abolition of pioneering Orthodox Jewish feminist Rambam's Principles? slavery and feminism into Jewish practice. 2. This is not "Guilt by Association:' as Gary Rosen­ blatt, editor of The Jewish Weck, headlined an arti­ So why does Ms. Krasner-Davidson cle (Feb. 7, '97), in which he decried the rejection want to be an "Orthodox" rabbi? She of this gathering by the "rebbes" of Yeshiva Rabbi nother featured speaker at the gave two reasons: the first was that with­ Yitzchak Elchanan, on the basis of the Convention's left-leaning leadership. This is a case of"Defining Convention was Haviva Ner­ in the Orthodox community, a Con­ a Movement, By Virtue of its Leadership" (as was A David, who was featured in a servative rabbi has little authority (in the RIETS rcbbes' judgment). recent article in The Jerusalem Post (Feb. other words, she would want the Ortho-

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 9 dox con1munity to recognize her status Q. What you are looking for as an making them women" (Alisa Solomon, as a "rabbi" ); the second reason, that agent of change is a series of incre­ Village Voice, Feb. 20, '97), implying that, "the practices of many member syna­ mental changes that will generate first, the rabbis were sexist in formu­ gogues are not consistent with the their own dynamic and their own lating the beracha, and second, that it is practices of the seminary." (Put more logic. Obviously, that logic could lead in the power of today's rabbis to change succinctly in the more recent Jerusalem to some of the same kind of decisions the text of our established tefillos. Report article, she decided against that the Reform movement has come becoming a Conservative rabbi when to - say , eventually the ordination she "realized I didn't want to be the only of women .... Are you saying that the observant person in my congregation:') halacha is, in effect, open to that kind In another sardine-packed (sic) The first reason is nothing new. For of reinterpretation or even amend­ auditorium, Rabbi David Silber, years, rabbis of Conservative and ment? founder of Manhattan's Drisha Insti­ Reform ideologies have wanted us, the A. As far as I understand halacha, tute, where woman can study Talmud Torah community, to recognize their yes, it is a matter of timing, it is a mat­ and other texts, was at the receiving legitimacy as bearers of the Jewish tra­ ter of authority, who does it. I think end of a veritable firing range. Gasps dition. Unlike Ms. Ner-David, howev­ that you know very well that two peo­ were heard as one woman asked his er, they are honest enough to accept that ple can issue the same halachic deci­ personal opinion on female rabbis. they have made a break with the meso­ sion and one would be immediately "I have no problem, per se, with rah that Orthodox Judaism represents, identified as a Reform rabbi and they women rabbis;' he answered. "I have and they are just too fur beyond accept­ would say no, and the other would be a problem with rabbis in general, to tell able limitations to make a pretense.3 identified as an Orthodox rabbi and you the truth." Amid the laughter, Sil­ The second reason bears more care­ they would say yes ... It will be a long ber said the role of rabbis should be ful examination because it illustrates time before we see women serving as redefined so they are seen more as edu­ why so many Jewish feminists insist on cantors or rabbis or being on rabbinic cators. His answer was cheered by the calling themselves Orthodox in spite of courts. audience. their failure to adhere to what we In other words, the difference Silber also called for a "reinvigora­ would consider an Orthodox ideology. between Orthodox and Reform agendas tion" of the day school system for both And, more importantly, it also illustrates for change is simply a matter of timing, boys and girls, and for the creation of what is happening to a segment within not substance. Jewish studies curricula that allow girls Orthodoxy. As we continue through this as well as boys to learn such subjects selection of quotations, it is worth *** as Talmud. "In my view, they should bearing in mind. get exactly the same education." rominent on the program was QUOTED IN FULL FROM THE LoNG *** Rabbi Irving ("Yitz") Greenberg ISLAND JEWISH WORLD, FEB. 21, '97. Pof CLAL, who has given pluralism nd then we had Leah Shakdiel new meaning by describing the differ­ Yet from time immemorial, Torah addressing the Conference. Nine ences between Orthodox and Reform as education - both formal and informal Ayears ago, she made headlines as being akin to the disputes between Hil­ - for boys has been tailored different­ the first woman to run for election to lel and Shammai6. He called for rabbis ly from that of girls, reflecting the dis­ an Israeli religious council, which over­ to forbid men "to say the infamous daily tinctively different roles each is destined sees religious institutions and appoint­ prayer in which they thank G-d for not to play in a Torah society. ments in its specific locale'. In an ______,, ______4. The ha/acha dearly limits the role of women in interview with Moment magazine:., Ms. public affairs, as unequivocally stated by the Ram­ *** Shakdiel was quoted as follows: bam ( Hildros Melachim 1:5), and on that basis, the Rabbanut 11arashit has ruled that the exclusion of Two Modern Orthodox rabbis who 3. The classic example of this is the Jewish Th<"o­ women from active public roles should at least be participated in the conference are logical Seminary, which was created to further a honored in the Moatzot Hadatiot, Israel's Religious modern American style of Orthodoxy. In spite of Councils. starting a training program for high­ the presence of such noted radicals as Mordechai ly educated Orthodox Jewish women Kaplan (the founder of Reconstructionist Move­ 5. ''A Woman of Valor: A Moment interview with ment, a religious system without belief in G-d!) on Leah Shakdie!;' Jan.-Feb. '87. See also, "Spotlight on that - the rabbis acknowledge - the faculty, it maintained its daim to being Israel: Trouble in the Religious Councils," The Jew­ could bring them one step closer to ish Observer Sept. '88. "Orthodox" until well into the l 930's. In the late rabbinic ordination. Saul Berman l 920's, JTS chairman Louis Marshall tried to 6. Opinions in the latter case have been described engineer a merger between JTS and Yeshiva Rabbi as"These and those are the words of our living G-d" [formerly rabbi of Manhattan Lincoln Yitzchak Elchanan, on the grounds that America did ( Eiruvin 13b). In the case of Reform, their doctrine Square Synagogue, currently dean of not need two Orthodox rabbinical schools. It was rejects one after another of the Rambam's Princi­ YU's Stern College for Women) and only after the merger was thwarted that JTS began ples of Faith, including acceptance of the Torah itself to accept the designation as "Conservative." as "the words of our living G-d." Avi Weiss ... are establishing a program

------·--·--·-··------·----·------·---- 10 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 that will train women to deal with the clear that women would not be ideological and pragmatic aspects of involved in any of the prohibited he modern Western world working in positions of Orthodox reli­ areas, but on the other hand, would , , harps on the different roles gious and educational leadership .... allow women to function profession­ Tof men and women as being The new program will teach women ally in Orthodox synagogues. Toward synonymous with ,wo,men's inferi­ about the halachic issues involved with this end, Rabbi Saul Berman and l are ority. Our Torah has always stressed the propriety of women functioning as developing a program to help train the greatness of women, their wis· leaders and purveyors of Jewish law, women to do just that. It is slated to dom and potential for maximum witnesses and judges, Berman said in begin next year." kedusha, with, countless exam pf es, an interview.... The day is quickly com­ QUOTED FROM MANHATTAN JEVVJSH such as that of Avraham and Sarah: ing when a woman will have the SENTINEL. MARCH 14, ·97 "All that Sarah will tell to .you - training she needs to be eligible for the hearken to her voice"; or of the Orthodox rabbinate, Berman said, Such assignments are clear breaks women of the dor hamkibar (the gen­ but the other obstacles are daunting. with Mesorah and cannot be initiated by eration that spent forty years in the "While it would theoretically be pos­ social activists, even if they are ordained. wilderness) who would not partic­ sible to define ordination without Such weighty decisions are the province ipate as the men did in both the sin those specific requirements, I don't of Gedolei Hadar. Whom have Rabbis of the Golden Calf and the Spies. think that it's productive or useful for Berman and Weiss consulted? In his introduction to Chumash the orthodox community to think in Shemos,the Ramban compares many that direction:' Berman said. (Quot­ aspects of the Mishkan to the tent ed in full from )TA report) of Sarah lmeinu. The menora (can· , The new term that has been devel­ nother leading spokesperson at delabra), which remai,ne,d lit from oped for these women is "poskot," the he Conference was Rivka Haut. week to week - as did the candles female parallel to the term "poskim;' n a published essay, Rivka Haut , of Sarah; the shufchan (table} with its which means an authoritative inter­ writes of the frustration many women /echem (bread) that remained fresh preter of Jewish law. suffer for davening behind the mechitza from week to week - similar to the In a major address at the Conference, and not taking active part in tefil/a bet­ beracha that blessed her dough;and Rabbi Avi Weiss, senior rabbi of the zibbur. She states: the annanim - the Presence of Hebrew Institute of Riverdale and Assis­ An increasing number are finding Hashem, so similar to the Clouds of tant Professor of Judaic Studies at Stern this situation intolerable. This is espe­ Glory atop the tent ofSarah lmeinu. College, Yeshiva University', encouraged cially true as women acquire a better We tend to think of the Mishkan as the growth of woman's prayer groups•. Jewish education. . . . Despite diffi­ the ultimate place for feeling the He hedged a bit at the issue of ordain­ culties created by halachic limita­ Divine Presence. Yet the Ramban ing women, but seemed to make room tions on the participation of women states: "At that point [when the for the possibility by watering down the in public religious ritual, women who Mishkan was completed], their sta· concept of men's semicha sufficiently to desire more active participation in the tus was restored to the high Ieve! allow for the possibility of women in the synagogue have chosen to remain that marked the Patriarchs ... indeed, · rabbinate. within the Orthodox movement, they had served as the chariot for Among other comments•, he sug­ retaining a life-style that offers the His glory:' . . gested: The Mishkan is only an imitation "A new title ought to be designed 9. "The issue of women's ordination -women's scmi­ of the natural place for the resting for women, let us say, morateynu, cha- is more complex. Truth to be told, there exists of the woman reaches no semicha, no true ordination, today, not even for men. Schechina.A which would on the one hand make it .. her her completion - "\A/hen one is ordained today, it is not - in the sheleimus - by fulfilling her role in accordance 7. Rabbi Weiss is also co-founder and co-mentor of strict halachic sense - the receiving of the Semi­ MeORoT- a Modern Orthodox Rabbinic Train­ chah, which is a line passed down from generation With MesorasAvos.All the rest is only . ing Fellowship, which is an arm of Edah, the Mod­ to generation. Rather it is an indication that one has · a poor imitation ofthe very beau- mastered various areas of halacha and can pasken, ern Orthodox group dedicated to advancing an agen­ tiful original. da of radical change (see JO Feb. '97, pp. 22-24). or render a ruling, accordingly. "There is also the presumption that the ordained rabbi will carry out (Rebbetzin) RuthyAssaf 8. "Women's prayer groups are spreading around the the full gamut of Orthodox rabbinic chores, some Tiferes BaisYaakov, country and abroad. The agenda now ought to be of which are halachically closed to women. Menaheles to move those which meet in homes or hotels into Brooklyn, NY synagogues. Such a move would give greater legit­ "Rather than speak of rabbinic ordination for imacy to women's prayer groups and is halachical­ wo1nen, we ought to assess the primary role played (Excerpted from a letter. to the ly preferable, as it is better to pray in a shul even when by rabbis and evaluate which of these roles can be editor, as yet unpublished.) praying individually. We should also carefully performed by women. Certainly, women can consider ways to involve women more fully in gen­ become administrators, counselors, poskot, toanot eral, co-ed service:' (emphasis mine - N.W.) - and teachers - areas which make up much of a Rabbi Avi Weiss rabbi's responsibilities."-Rabbi Avi Weiss

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 71 Not About Power individual an intensive and enriched Joel Wolowelsky argued that denying spiritual life, membership in a warm women the right to say kaddish, the I am a wife, mother and freelance and vibrant community, and the ben­ prayer of mourning, is halachically computer consultant. I attend efits of an excellent yeshiva educational incorrect ... Leah Shakdiel [suggested J Masoret, a school for women inter· systcmio. that African American and Latina ested in advanced Judaic studies Later in the article, Ms. Haut reveals feminists could offer Jewish women including Talmud. I, and all of the stu­ how the desire to be "Orthodox" and the models of how to affirm communal dents at Masoret, were amazed desire to conform to traditional notions ties while subjecting the community when we read the letter by Bat of halacha and hashkafa diverge when to a feminist critique. Sheva Marcus [a participant in the she reports that the "decision" of Julie Stern, who is studying at Orthodox Feminist Conference], whether a group of ten or more women Midreshet Lindenbaum in Israel said: "Teaching Girls Talmud" (Feb. 28), can constitute a minyan is ({unre­ "Create a new form of minyan with 20 stating that when you teach a girl Tai· solved."11 Wasn't this matter ({resolved" people. Ten men and 10 women, and mud, you allow her into the "con­ quite authoritatively by the opinions don't begin davening unless all 20 are trol room" of Judaism, and give her recorded in the Mishna, Talmud, Ram­ there." the ability to "challenge misinfor· bam, Tur and Shulchan Aruch? Blu Greenberg insisted that even­ mation, analyze the current rulings tually Orthodox feminists will have to and, best of all, clarify the distinction address the exclusionary language of between Jewish law and social pol­ "* Jewish liturgy. In a critique ofhalacha, icy." few more choice quotes, which Rabbi Noam Zohar described Since when has learning Torah reveal where many are finding women's relegation to second-class sta­ become a struggle for power? Ms. the source of their values and tus as 'chief rabbi of Israel, order to create an "Orthodox be or not to be a minyan was a major issue at the second Women's Tefillah Network conference, on Ovadiah Yosef, and will be using the power structure that includes Jan, 30~31, l 988. At that conference, noted Ortho­ methodology of the late sage, Rabbi women;~ it is no wonder that the dox scholar and feminist Blu Greenberg suggested Moshe Feinstein, to find ways to rabbis are disparaging it. that it is time for women's prayer groups to becon1e minyanim .... annul marriages, he said, proclaiming Jessie Fischbein, Inwood, NY. "Women reciting Kaddish are often those who seek that «this is a beis din whose time has (From a letter to The Jewish Week, greater participation in prayer. Women's recitation come." Mar. 21, '97.) of Kaddish is supported by most women in daven­ ing groups." QUOTED FROM FOHWARD, FEB. 21, '97

12 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 One would do well to poll the is accepted by many as one of Rabbi feel compelled to emulate the male for­ poskim, dayanim and the full ranks of Soloveichik's closest disciples, wrote a mat, albeit without the ritual embell­ Torah authorities to find even one who 17-page responsum on the topic, pro­ ishments of a minyan? "annuls marriages using Rabbi Moshe hibiting the practice. In fact, a declara­ Let us not forget that the classic form Feinstein's methodology:' More on that tion to this effect was issued by five of tefi//a- all tefilla- is modeled after later. Rabbe'im of the beis midrash of Yeshi­ Chana's entreaties before G-d in Shilo va University's Yeshivas Rabbi Isaac that He present her with a child. So Ill. SOME OF THE ISSUES Elchanan. potent was her tefilla that He respond­ On what basis, then, do Orthodox ed to her by giving her Shmuel - the Women's Prayer Groups women assume the right to convene Prophet who was compared to Moshe such prayer groups for"achieving spir­ and Aaron, even though he lived a full t was quite clear from the writings itual elevation"? How can they contin­ 400 years after their time. of Rabbi Moshe Feinstein that he ue to do so as Orthodox women? And And Chana's tefilla was offered in I had strong opinions on Orthodox how do Orthodox rabbis encourage the solitude. Jewish feminism, as stated in a teshuva practice? (halachic responsum) written in 1976 The Torah's View of Woman's Role and published in Igros Moshe, Orach "Learning" From a Sefer Torah Chaim 4:49. The teshuva begins by not­ ver the years, these pages have ing that the belief in the Divine origin omen who "read the weekly featured numerous discussions of both the Written and Oral Torah is Porsha" from a Sefer Torah 0 on the woman's role in a Torah a foundation of our faith, and that fail­ W claim that they do not mean society. We will simply refer the reader ure to believe in the Divine origin of the to simulate the men's public Torah read­ to a brief excerpt from an article that was Oral Torah amounts to kefira, or heresy. ing. In fact, they do not recite the bera­ published in The Jewish Observer over Reb Moshe then goes on to discuss how chos as men do; they"save" their morn­ twenty years ago, which needs no elab­ women were exempted from certain ing Birchas Ha Torah for this moment. oration or adjustment for the passage of mitzvos because of their role in main­ They then "read the Torah only as a time (see sidebar, next page). taining their homes and raising their means of studying Chumash" - and The Torah fashioned a role for families. This exemption, he under­ they find the experience exhilarating". women based on eternal, immutable scores, is of Divine origin, and accep­ One wonders: Do any readers know truths. Thus, calls for change would tance of its validity is as binding as are of even one man who studies the Par­ imply a maligning of Torah wisdom. any Torah commands. sha from a Torah scroll? No, it's not that biology is destiny; Addressing the issue of a woman who Whom are they kidding? biology reflects destiny, and accommo­ wishes to don ta//is and tefillin, he states As for the need for a public setting dates it. that while the act per se is not forbid­ for tefi/la, Chaza/ designated the minyan den, the ideological outlook with which - ten men of maturity- as the means The Sarah Schenirer Revisionists she approaches the activity may render for creating a halachic community, the it a forbidden act - that is, unless her prescribed setting that is blessed with the every girl who entered a Bais motives are sincere beyond the shadow Shechina's presence. This aura endows Yaakov knows, Sarah Schenirer, of suspicion. Thus, if she does not the efforts of a minyan of men with the AJ widely admired - even accept fully the woman's assigned role means to communicate more effective­ revered - woman is celebrated for hav­ in mitzvos, and if she denies its divine ly with their Creator. ing founded the Bais Yaakov schooling origin, then she has "a complaint with \!Vhi1e women do not form a minyan, system for girls. G-d and His Torah" and her act they can take advantage of its spiritual By a canard that was spun out of one becomes an act of kefira, or heresy. This force where it does exist. If, for any rea­ part fragmentary precedent, and two same approach was applied by Reb son, they are disturbed or distracted parts historical revisionism, she is being Moshe to women's prayer groups". from their devotions in a minyan setting, described by various journalist and let­ While some who were close to Rabbi they have two choices: they can attempt ter-writers in popular media as respon­ Joseph B. Soloveichik testify to his sim­ to bring order to the situation. Or they sible for a form of education "innovat­ ilarly negative view of women's prayer can resort to tefilla in privacy, which is ed ... in Poland before World War II, ... groups, there are those who claim oth­ the normative setting for female com­ rejected initially be many rabbis as a erwise. Yet Rabbi Hershel Schachter, who munication with G-d. Why must they threat to Torah lifestyles," "as a role

12. The text of a letter to this effect, written in Rabbi 13. Rabbi Weiss pern1its this even though he 14. Sylvia Barack Fishman, in Jewish \.Veek, ll.1arcb Fein.stein's name, can be found in Rabbi Avi Weiss's admits that both Rabbi Feinstein and Rabbi Solove­ 7, '97 book, \¥omen at Prayer, p.109. Interestingly, Rabbi ichik disapproved of the practice; see his book, pp. Weiss omits a crucial opening paragraph. 108-109.

The Jewish Observer, April 7997 i 3 model for the organizers of women's subsequent guidance and involvement gence of the Bais Yaakov schools was not prayer groups,1s for having turn[ed] of the leading luminaries of the time, an expression of a populist uprising that halacha upside down, startling] her own including those mentioned [although shook up the rabbinically controlled little 'War of the Rabbis' by pitting the Rabbi S.R. Hirsch had passed away more establishment. It had won the backing Chofetz Chayim, the Belzer Rebbe and than 30 years before, his spiritual heirs, of the rabbis on their own terms, in Rav Shimshon Refael Hirsch against the including Rabbi Leo Deutchlander and accordance with their criteria. overwhelming majority of rabbis."16 Dr. Judith Rosenbaum (Grunfeld) were The function of the Bais Yaakov None of this, of course, was the case. deeply involved in the Bais Yaakov school system was to compensate for the Sarah Schenirer did not launch her pro­ movement J. Similarly, the Gerer Rebbe waning influence of the Jewish home, gram until she had the approval and (the Imrei Emes) appointed Rabbi Yehu­ and to serve as a counter-influence da Leib Orlean as educational director against the corrosive effects of the cul­ 15. "Make no mistake ... the women in question [the organizers of the women's rninyanim in Queens J are of the Bais Yaakov network of schools. tural market place. This is a far cry from not rebels. They are not looking to break with tra­ All under the approving eye of Rabbi the Orthodox Feminist agenda of"study dition or challenge Jewish law, which they revere .... Chaim Ozer Grodzenski ofVilna. Sarah of the Talmud by women as a means of Every bold new step has been criticized in some quar­ ters as breaking with tradition .... The founder of the Schenirer was not a rebel by any stretch enpowerment," to set up a militant Bais Yaakov school system, Sarah Schenirer, was wide­ of the word. She was one of the nashim structure to battle against the "male ly attacked by rabbinical leaders in the early part of tzidkaniyos (righteous women) of her dominated rabbinate:' this century for the radical concept of giving Ortho­ dox girls a Jewish education .... Fortunately, though, time - a devout Jewish woman who she prevailed, and women's learning has steadily inspired a generation of young women A Beil Din for Agunos increased and become accepted." - Gary Rosenblatt, with her fidelity to Torah law and val­ editor of Jewish Week, in his publication, Feb. 7, '97. ues, and her unquestioning respect for ne of the sessions of the Con­ 16. Joe Bobker, in the Los Angeles Jewish Times, Mar. 6,'97. the rabbis who directed her. The emer- ference dealt with the terrible 0 plight of agunos, wherein women are held captive in a non-viable As the Torah -privileges denied all other Jews.Yet, in marriage by a recalcitrant husband Differentiates turn, he has no ancestral lands, and relies who refuses to issue a get, the halachic on "priestly portions" and gifts for his bill of divorcement. Any such case is a The entire Torah-dictated structure of livelihood. tragedy, and all possible steps - indi­ society reflects a higher spiritual reality, There are other roles of privilege and vidual and communal - should be and these realities are the starting point limitation that are assumed by choice taken to guide such situations to a pro­ for biological and psychological aspectS of rather than by birthright. "Whoever ductive resolution. creation. One simply does not deal with takes the burden ofTorah upon himself The chairpersons of that particular one without the other. is absolved of obligations to the govern­ session published a report on their pro­ Woman, her personal role, her status ment" (Avos 3, 6), referring to exemption ceedings in which they expressed "anger in home and society, reflect characteris~ from taXes and military service .... and frustration at the lack of the rab­ tics very much her own. These halachic Women as a genre are also assigned binic response to help free agunos by particulars correspond to biological and to a pursuit all their own --as is the utilizing available remedies within Jew­ emotional specifics - her child-bearing Kohein. And women are expected to ish law" (Jewish Press, Mar. 7, '97). and nurturing capacity, her superior intu­ become so totally immersed in the role Well said, but not reflected in prac­ itive capacity.And all of these are part of of serving as the home-base of all Jewish tice. According to the Jewish Week, the "Vayiven -He fashioned her..:· accord­ activity ("His wife, she is his house") to members of the much balleyhoo-ed Beit ing to a specific design (see Bereishis 22,3). the exclusion of all distracting obligato­ Din include Rabbis Irwin Haut, Shalom And the details, the many facets of her ry activities. Their childbearing capacity Klass, Moshe Morgenstern, and design, are outlined in the Torah. should not merely be viewed as the Emanuel Rackmanl7. The woman's role is not the object of source of responsibility. It is an expres· This beit din's claim of basing annul­ discrimination - just one of definition. sion of it. ment of marriages on the methodolo­ There are many such assigned roles in Thus, a woman is not obligated in most gy of Rabbi Moshe Feinstein would be Jewry that seem to spell advantage ~ or mitzvos that are time-bound. Nor is she laughable if not for its tragic implica­ disadvantage -to the select; but, in truth, involved in those that require communi­ tions. Following their course of conduct they are assignments of responsibility.The ty, such as tefilla betzibbur, or bearing wit­ would result in bringing a flow of Kohein enters the exclusive Temple areas ness in monetary cases;and bearing arms mamzeirim into our midst, the fruit of to perform Divine serevice. Daily he bless­ is viewed as "masculine" and outside her "marriages" that would follow invalid es his fellow Jews, prefacing his words with preview.Yet, it is in the home where she annulments. In a private conversation the beracha:"Blessed art Thou ... who sanc­ finds her fulfillment. UO Dec. '74) with the author of this article, after this tified me with the sanctity of Aharon .. :' conference, Rabbi Dovid Feinstein,

14 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 older son of Reb Moshe and uncon­ extreme views presented? At least one Yeshiva University, and they in turn are tested expert on his father's halachic reporter (Alisa Solomon, Village Voice) citing a clear p'sak from five roshei yeshi­ responsa, described this claimed quoted a participant as resenting or feel­ va ofYU's Yeshiva Rabbi Isaac Elchanan. approach as totally without any basis ing threatened by "all these extreme In this very basic issue, there is no divi­ whatsoever. interpretations, all this rabbi-bashing:' sion between "them" and "us." Implicit in the creation of this "beit Nor were all the partcipants comfortable The question then is, as phrased in the din,"by the way, is a brazen repudation being called feminists. opening section of this article: Do Jew­ of the sensitivity of rabbinic courts "Secular feminism has really taken ish values and understanding of mitzvos throughout the centuries, for their over the Orthodox's view of an eshet come from an unbroken chain of Meso­ alleged lack of concern for the plight of chayi/," complained one young woman, rah that stems from Sinai? And by the the aguna and for not having employed referring to traditional views of what same token, does our Jewish Under­ such measures as annulment in the past. makes a "righteous woman" in the standing of the nature and assigned roles It is also worth mentioning in this Orthodox community. The woman of man and woman come form this same context that much has been achieved in said that she was hearing a lot of neg­ unbroken chain' Or do these respond to alleviating the plight of agunos recent­ ativity concerning motherhood in the changing social conditions, as the result ly. According to an article in the Orthodox context, which she has always of coaxing new readings and insights Jerusalem Post (Feb. 19, '97) the num­ perceived as a "beautiful thing:' from ancient texts, in an evolutionary ber of agunot in Israel today stands at MANHAITAN JEWJSff SEN11NEL­ development? 21 compared to 450 several years ago FEB. 21. '97 In this context, institutional "Ortho­ because of active campaigning by doxy" - with its full range of prefixes responsible parties.... Not yet cause for How many participants felt the same - is of no help. Either one is an adher­ celebration, but certainly an encourag­ way? Why are they being ignored? (See ent to Taras Moshe al pi Mesoras Avos­ ing trend. sidebar, p. 12.) the Torah as presented to Moshe Rabbeinu at Sinai, as interpreted and IV. WHO'S ABOARD FOR THE TRIP! *'* applied by contemporary Gedolei Torah, immutable and unchanged - or one is he news reports cited above raise ehind the question of Orthodox not. That issue is the defining fault line. some serious questions. First of feminism, there is the much larg­ Tall, how many of the 400-to-one­ Ber issue, of whether or not "Ortho­ V. A POSTSCRIPT thousand part1c1pants (depends on dox Judaism" stands for the uncontest­ which paper you read) agreed with the ed authority of halacha as we understand s for the so-called Chareidi com­ it. In a different context, Professor Aaron munity, it should not view cur­ 17. Rabbi Rackman has distinguished himself by test­ Twerski asked the following: rent threat in more modern cir­ ing the waters beyond halachic limits in a number A of areas, including the dissolution of marriages. On "Isn't it essential that someone cles with equanimity. To avoid the one notable occasion, he was known to have pro­ declare that the 'field' begins and infiltration of feminism into our posed abolition of a Talmudic principle upon which ends with unquestioning emuna, and precincts, we must clarify and reinforce much of 1narriage law is based, for being an anachro­ nism, reflecting (he claimed) a particular social con­ that denial of Ikrim (basic tenets of our own understanding of the role of dition no longer extant. In a public address, Rabbi faith) does not render someone in the women in a Torah society, the central­ Yosef Dov Soloveichik vehemently repudiated 'left wing' but totally out of the ball­ ity of tzenius, the importance to women Rabbi Rackman's approach as presaging the end to park?"rn haJachic n1le as we know it. {The address was record­ of possessing knowledge and awareness ed at the time.) This question, raised with regard to of Torah directives, as well as the com­ Recently, Rabbi Rackn1an has gone beyond his Rabbi Irving Greenberg almost nine years pelling importance and the prescribed usual dismissal of recognized Torah leadership and ago, can be asked today of virtually every limits of their role. And we must not the "ultra-Orthodox" group that identifies with them, by quoting a Dr. FJalne Z. Jacobson, a clini­ speaker at the recent conference. hesitate to create an ambitious agenda cal psychologist in Champaign, IL, to the effect "that One could well suggest that the fault for extending our use of the media and the so-called ultra-Orthodox are really deviation­ line that divides "us" from "them" is not our educational systems for outreach ist with no commitment to the authentic histori­ cal process of Judaism. She denies them the right formal affiliation with Orthodoxy as and hasbara (popular clarification) to to be known as ultra-Orthodox. With that desig­ opposed to Conservatism. Nor does it portray the beauty of k'vuda bas melech nation they appear to lay claim to a superior sta­ lie between the Modern Orthodox p'nima (the internal beauty of Jewish tus when in fact they are adversely affecting Jew­ ish survival and the continuity of our people and camp and those identified with the womanhood) for ourselves and for faith" (Jewish Week Feb. 7, '97). He backs this con­ Yeshiva and Chassidic communities. others. tention by citing their !our) current revival of"the Most of the members of the Queens We too need clarification and rein­ totally repulsive institutions of concubines and polygamous marriage.... " Vaad Harabbonim are graduates of forcement of our principles of faith, and For such monstrous libel, no comment is neces­ the integrity of our specific roles in a sary. 18. The Jewish Observer,June '88, p. 21. Torah society. •

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FREEDOM WITHOUT INDEPENDENCE going to treat me ever in like that and get et's face it; you don't have to be away with it!" Or, religious to believe in freedom. All Nour exile in today's vernacu­ Lsorts of people with all kinds of lar, "I don't get beliefs mark their Day of Independence have we Jews mad; I get even." In with unrestrained joy and jubilant cel­ truth, vengeful acts ebration. In fact, the concept of freedom enioyed such and attitudes are is probably unique in the univeral extensive merely responses to scope of its appeal. This makes the Jew­ the provocations of ish Festival ofFreedom something of an personal liberty. others. They, along oddity. Surely, no other day of inde­ with other negative pendence has as many rites and restric­ Freedom of impulses, often seem to be tions as does the holiday of Passover. Nor beyond our control. "That is there any other Jewish festival that speech, freedom of person insulted me and made me demands so much of our time and ener­ extremely angry:' "My teacher gy in preparation. This seems to be a religion - our yelled at me for coming late to class. very curious way to commemorate our That makes me very depressed." emancipation from the yoke of slavery. European ancestors "My children constantly fight over The answer may lie in a better under­ the most ridiculous issues. Their standing of the concept of freedom. would be flabbergasted behavior makes me so upset that I Never in our exile have we Jews enjoyed can't contain my temper." such extensive personal liberty. Freedom by what we take for The truth is, however, that of speech, freedom of religion - our nothing in this world can European ancestors would be flabber­ granted. But are we make us depressed and no gasted by what we take for granted. But really free? one on earth can make are we really free? Do we truly live inde­ pendent lives? Or is our liberation a mere echo of the distant past, lost in the real­ us angry. And there is ities of our daily lives? Rabbi Avi Shul­ I greet him in certainly no force in creation that man offers the following allegory: response to his nastiness, I will be allow­ can force us to seek revenge. Rather, A man bought the daily paper every ing his conduct to dictate mine. I do not there is a vital step that separates these morning from a local newsstand. Every intend to subject my behavior to his provocations from our reactions to day he entered the store with a cheer­ control." them. That is the chain of thought that ful greeting, and every day he received Is that the way we react when pro­ rushes through our minds at the a surly and hostile response. Once, a voked? Or do we allow others to incite moment of interaction, noting the friend ca1ne to visit and observed this our passions and rob us of our rational event and choosing a response. "That routine. After a few days, he could no judgment? All too often, the answer is was a very nasty comment. I feel angry longer contain himself "Why do you the latter. On too many occasions, and annoyed, and would like to respond persist in trying to be friendly when you anger and excitement take hold of our in kind." "That mistake really made me know that it gets you nowhere?" hearts and refuse to let go. Caught in look foolish. I feel like withdrawing from His host replied, "If! change the way their grip, we react with words and deeds the conversation in embarrassment." that we would never choose in a These inner reactions take place so Rabbi Roberts is the Mashgiach Ruchani of Yeshi­ moment of calm. quickly that they are barely noticeable, va Shaar HaTorah of Queens. His essay, "But I Only In many cases, we do so with a touch but no reaction occurs without them. Want to Be a Maccabee," was featured in JO Dec. '96. of pride. "I'm nobody's fool. No one is And they come from our perception of

18 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 the occurrence and our attitude towards and deeds; nor even do our own desires. of his clothing, the length of his hair, or it, not from the event itself. If we view Rather, we bind our will to the standards the nature of his actions, he declares to what happened as overwhelming, we set by another group or individual. Sure­ the world at large, "I am my own man!'' will be overwhelmed. If we see it as cause ly this is nothing less than slavery! Or so he believes. The reality, however, for anger, anger will be ours. Thus, the The surrender of our will to others is something else entirely. The need to words and actions of others are not the also occurs when we submit ourselves look and act the same as everyone else final arbiters of our happiness or gloom. to their opinions. "What will my class­ is really quite similar to the urge to be We are. But when we react impulsively mates think of me if I don't go along different. In both cases, the person's to those words and actions, we surren­ with the crowd?""How will it look to my actions flow from his compulsions der nothing less than our own free will. friends if I dress this way?" "What will rather than from his judgment. They are And we accept in its place the yoke of people say if I allow my children to based on how he appears to others - of all people! - the person who behave in this man.ner(" These are not rather than on what he wishes for him­ chose to annoy us. the thoughts of independent people. self. Thus, his decisions stem from Some slaves seek their master's kindness external factors that have no bearing on MASTERS, MASTERS EVERYWHERE and fear his whip; others seek his the issues at hand. approval and fear his rejection. But both nother common form of per­ live in the same state of bondage. MASTERS FROM WITHIN sonal enslavement is envy. How Some people pride themselves on A often do we pursue a goal pri­ maintaining the opposite extreme. "My ut it is not only to external mas­ marily to compete with someone else~ will and integrity are not for sale at any ters that we surrender our free­ How many hours do we waste on price. Once my mind is made up, Bdom. As Shlomo Hamelech states objectives that were never really ours? nothing in the world can induce me to in Kohel/es (9,14): There was a small How many dollars do we spend simply change it." A classic example of this town with few inhabitants, and a mighty to "keep up with the Joneses"? Every "independence" is that of the dedicat­ king came upon it and surrounded it, time this occurs, we confine ourselves ed non-conformist. His "principles" and built great siege works over it. The to the prison of other people's whims. demand that he throw convention to the Gemora (Nedarim 32b) interprets this Our principles no longer guide our goals winds and do things his way. By the cut as referring to the yeitzer hara- the evil

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 19 inclination. Thus, the wisest of men he completely overcomes a person's con­ challenge him." "That comment was offers us a vital insight into the essence science and totally dominates his deeds. rude and insulting; you'll have to of milchemes yeitzer- man's battle with Nor is the power of this evil despot respond sharply or you'll lose face." In his evil inclination. Our internal neme­ limited to frontal attacks. Far more truth, each of these "moral" imperatives sis is a mighty monarch, with powerful deadly is his uncanny ability to seduce is merely a way of justifying the gut reac­ forces at his command. And he lays siege us into self-delusion. Seemingly vital tion churning inside. No one likes to be to the very core of man's personality. concerns loom before us, demanding exploited or insulted without defending With every forbidden pleasure, a person concessions from our conscience. "He's his interests or honor. And most peo­ yields a bit more to the yeitzers author­ taking advantage of you; if you don't ple are tempted to dispute that with ity. With every rationalization, he cedes deceive him he'll get away with it:' "The which they disagree. Isn't it nice when another segment of his soul. Little by lit­ statement that person made was way off we can indulge those urges and assume tle the yeitzer's offensive progresses, until base; you must stop learning Torah and the mantel of lofty virtue in doing so? The defenses that feed these decep­ tions are particularly intense when self­ respect is at stake. The Gemora (Moed Katan 27b) states that when one com­ mits a sin and repeats it, it becomes per­ missible in his eyes. As explained by Rabbi Yaakov Kaminetsky '>":<>, this is due to a person's need to view himself favorably. He convinces himself of the validity of his misdeeds in order to maintain his self-esteem. If they are not perfectly legitimate, they are at least tol­ erable. Thus, a Jew may be fully com­ mitted to serving G-d's will and keep­ Even if you are not fluent in Yiddish, you will be fascinated by ing His commandments. Nevertheless, he will convince himself that the for­ Dos Yiddishe Vort's bidden is acceptable rather than face the new special "She'earis Hap'leita" publication reality of his sins. Can there be a now available at a special price! greater submission to mental slavery? This movingly written and lavishly illustrated history of the previous generation of European Torah-Jewry features: MISPLACED MOTIVATORS • A vivid verbal and photographic depic- • Portrayals of the spiritual strength and nother common submission of tion of the varied facets of Jewish reli- detennination of Jews newly liberated free will is caused by our ten­ gious life in pre-war Europe from the camps, and of the emergence of A dency to misinterpret our own European Torah-Jewry from the depths motivations. Rabbi Yaakov Kaminetsky • Historic and first-hand accounts of the of tragedy to an era of rebuilding '>':<>brings out this idea from the story evil unleashed on Europe's Jews in the • The story of the survivors' contribution of Lot. As related in the Torah, Lot cataclysmic horror of the Holocaust. to the revival of Torah-life. moved from the house of Avraham to 196 pages - ONLY $15! the decadent society of Sodom. The A particularly t/1011g/1tf11l giftfor Yiddish-speaki11g refatfres and friends! Torah is very clear about his motivation: "And Lot raised his eyes and he saw the ------Dos Yiddishe Vort • 84 William Street• New York, NY 10038 entire plane of the Jordan, that it was wholly watered" (Bereishis 13,10). His 0 Enclosed is my check for $15.00. Please send me the special She'eris Hap'leita move was a simple economic decision. publication. Nevertheless, Rashi cites tbe Sages as 0 Enclosed is my check for $25.00. Please enter my subscription to Dos Y1ddishe Vort offering a very different explanation: Lot, and send me the special She 'eris Hap '[eita publication (a savings of $/0.(}{}), they tell us, was drawn by the immoral­ Name ity that prevailed in Sodom. This is somewhat puzzling. Why do the Sages Address find it necessary to demean his decision, State __ Zip ______City when the Torah describes it in more acceptable terms?

20 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 Apparently, the Sages understood On the other extreme are those who that the simple explanation cannot be the have assumed exclusive rights to the whole story. Had Lot's righteousness ome slaves seek their banners of tolerance and Ahavas Yisroel. been up to par, he would not have moved They, too, lay claim to the purest of to such a location merely to enhance his Smaster's kindness and motives and the noblest of attributes, financial status. Mundane considerations and they revile all who reject their lib­ would not have warranted leavingAvra­ fear his whip; others seek eral perspective. But that claim rings hol­ ham for the decadent environment of his approval and fear his low when the banner is abused. Toler­ Sodom. Thus, the Torah describes Lot's ance does not mean to excuse the mentality as Lot understood it. He was reiection. But both live in the inexcusable and accept the unaccept­ clearly convinced that his motivations able.We certainly must be very careful were economic. Nevertheless, the Sages same state of bondage. about expressing tolerance for infideli­ reveal to us what he himself did not real­ ty to the laws of the Torah. ls it really ize, that his true motivation was his own II pure Ahavas Yisroel we are expressing, moral weakness. At some level, the depravity of Sodom appealed to the baser aspects of his character. The applications of this tendency are endless. How many times do we persist in finding fault with someone in need -to excuse our reluctance to help him? "That shnorrer doesn't seem legiti­ mate; I'll bet his letter of reccomenda­ tion is forged." "If she would stop try­ ing to take care of everyone else, she wouldn't need my help:' "The way he treats other people, he doesn't deserve our assistance." We convince ourselves that our positions are unassailable, but they are really just excuses.

THE RELIGIOUS FACTOR

his trait is especially dangerous when we hide behind our reli­ Tgious ideals. Thus, wherever there are different opinions about religion, there are those who feel compelled to The Mishnah with commentary by Pinhas Kehati is truly a contemporary classic "defend the faith." Utterly convinced of and now it is available - in its entirety- in a new, clear English translation. their exclusive access to the absolute The MISHNAYOTli KEHATI contains each Mishnah in Hebrew and English truth, they disgrace and deride the followed by the complete Kehati commentary in English. Each Tractate is "heretical" views of all who disagree. But prefaced with a clear overview of its contents, including historical and are these people really the spiritual legal background material. descendants of Pinchas? Are their moti­ When it comes to the study of Mishnah, MISHNAYOTH KEHATI is the ideal vations truly as pure as they would have study companion: it is clear, concise, and easyMtoMuse and makes a us believe? Perhaps - in some cases. beautiful gift - for yourself or someone you know. Often, however, they are battling not for SPECIAL PRICE FOR ENTIRE SET • the honor of the Almighty, but for the 21 HANDSOMELY·BOUND VOLUMES, HARDCOVER - $325, advancement of their own outlook and EACH SEDER IS ALSO AVAILABLE INDIVIDUALLY IN ITS OWN BEAUTIFUL SLIPCASE. culture. And their zealotry flows not Available at all Jewish bookstores or direct from /',~..,,'" from the clarity of their vision, but from the narrowness of their perspective. Yet) FELDHEIM la PUBLISHERS they continue along their way, blissful­ Torah Literature of Quality ly certain of the righteousness of their 200 Airport Executive Park, Nanuet, NY 10954 •Tel {914) 356-2282 •Fax (914) 425-1908 •E-mail leldheim@wor!dplaza.com cause and the purity of their motives. Toll Free: 800-237-7149 • Ask for our catalog.

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 21 or does it perhaps stem from a lack of see it as diluted beyond recognition?" those dynamics and draw inspiration Ahavas Hashem? This category also includes one of the from them - and apply them to the This question is especially com­ most devastating weapons in the elements of bondage in our own per­ pelling when those professing such tol­ yeitzer's arsenal. I-laving incited a per­ sonal lives. erance engage in virulent attacks on son to sin, he then appears before hi1n This endeavor is dearly not an easy those who take a more stringent posi­ in "Rabbinic garb:' He flays him with one. But one factor that can greatly tion. Where is their Ahavas Yisroel words that sound noble and exalted: enhance our efforts is our very aware­ towards these Jews? Such individuals remorse, repentance, regret. Which sin­ ness of the slavery to which we have sub­ might ask themselves, "Is it really the cere Jew can resist the appeal of these mitted. By acknowledging that reality, honor of Kial Yisroel that moves me so ideals? But these would require great we unleash one of the most potent forces deeply, or is it the need to defend the effort and relentless toil, which are not in human nature. For freedom is an ideal integrity of my Judaism from those who the most appealing of prospects. "For­ that evokes a powerful response with­ tunately," a subtle shift takes place in the human heart. Countless lives have within the person's heart. His feelings been sacrificed, untold misery under­ PESACH GUIDE TO change to the destructive emotions of gone, for the sake of its attainment. Its MEDICATIONS guilt and despair. Instead of being capacity to move us is so strong, that it moved to spiritual renewal, he is driven sometimes outweighs even our most For A Copy of the Most to despair and defeat. "That was inex­ basic needs. Thus, the Midrash (cited by cusable; I will do better in the future;' Rashi, Bereishis 10,9) describes Nimrod Comprehensive Pesach Guide becomes forgotten. In its place comes a as one who recognized his Master (the to Medications I Cosmetics. somewhat different message. "That was Almighty) and intentionally rebelled horrendous; I am clearly incapable of against Him. So great was his craving for by: Rav Gershon Bess doing right. I'll never amount to any­ freedom that he engaged in a hopeless thing so I might as well give up." In this struggle against an omnipotent G-d Please write to: manner, he finds his excuse for avoid­ rather than submit himself to His KOLLEL LOS ANGELES ing the difficult endeavors before him. authority! 223 S. Formosa Avenue This mighty force can be harnessed Los Angeles. CA 90036 THE PURSUIT OF LIBERTY to resist the many facets of our person­ Phone: (213) 933-7193 al slavery. We need to recognize clearly (Unless you are already on our list) t is clear, then, that merely declaring that submission to them is submission ourselves to be free does not make to personal slavery. Our impulse to I it a reality. For much of what respond to offensive behavior in kind ?;U!Wl l"ll:I enslaves us comes from within our own enables that behavior to control our hearts and minds rather than from any own. Our desire to please and impress To be a Jew you have external force or power. And only by those around us causes us to make them to be different! releasing those internal manacles can we our masters - and so does our need to i:m •-r::iv achieve a true measure of independence. be different. Our urge to equal or sur­ With this in mind, we can better pass their attainments is the same When you kam Torah regularly with understand the nature of the Passover enslavement with a different face. And Tnl>'~i' then you are different. celebration. We do not celebrate only our willingness to surrender our con­ join the many who bring Torah daily the freedom we achieved, but also the victions to the impulses of the moment into their home by following process whereby we achieved it. And we - and our clarity of vision to blindness THE LUA CH FOR MISHNA AND are not involved in merely remember­ and delusion - is bondage in the fullest JIA/ACHA YOMIS. ing that process, but in trying, as well, sense of the word. Ask for it we will send you a !Tb to recapture it in our own lives. l"hus, Once this idea is fLXed in our minds, FREE. we immerse ourselves in an extensive we will be better equipped to resist these All the blessings of lellming Torah ritual of commemoration. We recite and tendencies. For our recognition that will be yours. discuss the events that took place. We they threaten our personal liberty will eat matzah along with marror, and dip rouse our fierce resistance to their Write or call: in charoses as well as in saltwater. We assault. Thus, we will draw upon our Rabbi Elias Karp lean as we eat and we drink four cups basic desire for freedom to combat their 470115th Avenue, #3C Brooklyn, NY 11219 • (718) 851-0770 of wine. And, little by little, as we relive subversive effect. With that to fuel our the events of our original emancipation, efforts, we can successfully overthrow Jn Memory of!lahbi & !rfts. Charles Bait Hartford, Conn. we bring its dynamics to life in our own their yoke and realize the true blessing minds and hearts. This enables us to tap of freedom. •

----·------22 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 ANTICIPATING PESACH Rabbi Myer]. Schwab

" em nown to our i ren an to . ' . '' our 1 ren~ I ren The Role of Grandparents in Thansmitting the Mesorah

randparents! Those kindly, lov­ dren:" Now, we know that the father events of the recent past that only they ing, gift-bearing and aging per­ must teach Torah to his son based upon can testify to, so will the grandchildren Gsons in the life of grandchildren the passage from Shma, "V'limad'tem come to realize that the stories of the have a lot more to offer than just cook­ osam es beneichem:' The grandfather's Torah and the recorded reports of our ies, hugs and kisses. Most of today's obligation to teach his grandson, how­ Chazal are equally rooted in reality, just grandparents were not zocheh to ever ever, is based upon the pasuk in Parshas like Bubby and Zaidy's life experiences. have known their grandparents, and are Vo'eschanan, where the Torah admon­ Mattan Torah really happened; it isn't thus lacking for role models after whom ishes us: "Be careful and guard yourself a fable ( chas mil'hazkir); it isn't just a to pattern their special responsibilities carefully lest you forget the things your story or a legend, but events that truly relating to grandchildren. And those eyes have seen, and lest they will stray occnrred to us as a people. who, perhaps, had the zechus of having from your heart all the days of your life. This shonld be reinforced by grand­ grandparents in America may have Make known to your children and parents as they reconnt their own "day found communication difficult. Now, your children's children the day that you that you stood before Hashem at Sinai." 50 years after the Holocaust, we need to stood before your G-d at Sinai" They had their own personal Kabbolas explore the special responsibilities and (Devarim 4,9-10). While the father has HaTorah, they saw tzaddikim and unique role of today's American-bred the obligation to teach Torah to his chil­ gedolim whom their children never saw Zeides and Bubbies by researching onr dren, the grandfather and the grand­ and cannot tell their own children rforah sources, and consulting our mother are required to imbne them with about. The seniors had unforgettable Torah teachers who were spared, to serve emuna (belief) in the Giver of the Torah. experiences of coming close to G-d as bridges between the two worlds. Grandparents are equipped with the worth sharing. The Rambam (Hilchos Talmud Torah special gifts to create a picture in the 1:2) tells us:"Justas it is mitzvatoteach minds of the grandchildren of "Maamad ... Pl °'1)) nlr.l> 'lPl... one's son Torah, so is there a 1nitzva to Har Sinai - the gathering at Monn! "REMEMBER THE DAYS OF YORE" teach one's grandson, as it says in the Sinai." Grandparents can tell grand­ Torah, 'Make then1 known to your children about things that only they saw. hile there are few grandpar­ children and to your children's chil- They can project an image of events of ents today who can tell their the past in the minds of their grand­ children about having met Rabbi Schwab is the dean of the Beth Jacob High W School of Denver. The above article is based on a children that is vivid, alive, and real. And the Chafetz Chayim '>"~!,grandparents presentation at the most recent national convention just as grandchildren accept that the must not fail to tell their grandchildren of Agudath Israel of America. senior generation were live witnesses to about their encounters with those of

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 23 European Gedolim who built Torah in story of my own. When I was a young thank you. I don't want to upset the America and are no longer with us. boy, my father Rav Shimon Schwab, ., .. lll child. I will sleep in the same room." Most of today's young parents are told me, "When you grow up, you can My father described how, in the mid­ unable to recall any of the Torah giants tell your friends, your children and your dle of that Friday night, he got up and who founded the great American grandchildren, that you were once a looked into the room. He cracked the yeshivas of Lakewood, Baltimore, roommate of Reb Elchonon Wasser­ door open and saw what he described Chaim Berlin, Mir and Telshe, who were man i"r.l," as "two tzaddikim sleeping": the baby old-world style tzaddikim, or the great When Rabbi Wasserman was in and Reb Elchonon, the tzaddik yesod Chassidic Rebbes who transplanted America, in 1939, he spent one Shab­ olam. My father went on to describe their dynasties to these shores. It is the bos in our house in Baltimore. I was how Rabbi Elchonon was sleeping in his obligation of grandparents to immor­ then a baby. .. a baby in a crib... and Reb bed with the peace ofmind and sweet­ talize these Gedolim in the minds of our Elchonon was offered my room. My ness that only a tzaddik can know. As American-born offspring. mother was prepared to take me out of it says: "How sweet is the sleep of the For instance, I can tell an incredible the room but Reh Elchonon said, "No oveid [Hashem]:' He was sleeping soundly in spite ofall the worries over events taking place at home in Europe, and what would await him when he Dear Yad Eliezer, Would return. He was sleeping on his side with his two hands under his head, So much is t1pent with the peace borne of his strong to make a memorable affair, The photographer, the band, emuna and bitachon and menuchas the makeup... and the hair. hanefesh (faith, trust and peace of Sheva Brachos outfits, mind), which had made such a strong a bracelet and a setting, impression on my father, and ultimately without a diamond ring on us, his children. can there be a wedding? The list is endless ... We must tell these experiences to our cufflinks and a tie grandchildren. We must talk about the The budgets overdrawn, Gedolei Yisroel we saw and our connec­ and there's so much still to buy. tion with them. Through our stories, we You tve given us opportunity can bring our children closer to emuna to really comprehend ~ the value of $1000 in Maamad Har Sinai because we are a and how much we overspend!! generation closer to that event and we There's great pleasure in knowing can serve as living links to that highpoint another couple will dance too. in history through events of the past. l'our work is tremendous How can we thank you? I had the privilege to study for a short time under the tzaddik Rabbi Sincerely, Eliyahu Lopian 7··~r, who was close to Mimi and Dovid 90 years old at the time. He told us that as a young student he had heard from his Rebbe, Rabbi Simcha Zissel of Kelm, that he, as a young boy, had seen This poem was received by Yad Eliezer along with a wedding sponsorship. Reb Chaim Volozhin. How quickly we You too can change _the life of a soon to be married couple! leap back in time, all the way to the Sponsor a Yad Eliezerwedding » Imagine how much more beautiful your own wedding will be. Vilna Goan - the Rebbe of Reb Chaim Volozhin! Over two hundred The Gitty Perkowski Simcha Fund of Yad Eliezer years are spanned through the medi­ Rabbi and Mr<. Zevi Trenk Mr. and Mrs. Zolly Tropper um of living testimony of just a few !586 E. 9th St. 1102 E. 26th St. talmid-rebbe connections. Grandpar­ Brooklyn, N.Y. 11230 Brooklyn. N.Y. 11210 ents should utilize whatever experi­ ences they have had and convey them to their children to shorten the chain Wedding sponsorships are $1000 for a whole of the Mesorah, linking them so much closer to Maamad Har Sinai. It holds wedding and $500 for a half of a wedding. an importance comparable to the teaching of Torah itself.

24 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 "J7111JN'11'lj?l "J1l'11'JN ':>NV young boy noticed that after his father Trickle-Down Esteem "ASK YOUR FATHER completed the Benching with his cus­ AND HE WILL RELATE IT TO YOU, tomary slow recitation and deep randparents should be ever cog­

YOUR ELDERS AND THEY kavana through "Al Yechasreinu1" his nizant of the lofty position in WILL TELL you:' mind wandered while reciting the Gwhich their children must be Horachamons. For a moment his held in the eyes of grandchildren, and argum Yonasan Ben Uziel elab­ father ran his index finger through the never undermine it. Grandparents orates on the above passage: crumbs on the table. Only then - should keep the special relationship T "Ask your father- these are the only through this momentary lapse in between parent and child in their minds books of the Torah. Ask your elders­ the ancillary portion of an ordinary whenever they are interacting with these are the books of the Nevi'im." daily Benching - did this young boy, their children in front of grandchildren. The father is identified with Torah, the with great disappointment, come to They must treat their children as total­ grandfather with the Navi. What a realize that his father was not yet on ly mature adults, even if they are young. revealing insight into the unique roles the madreiga that he had held him to If grandparents should see immature of parents and grandparents! be. behavior on the part of young parents, This means that when the father talks As the young boy grew older, this making mistakes in dealing with grand­ to his child, it is as if Hashem Himself disappointment served only to point children, whatever can be gained by speaks. His words are equated with the to the true greatness of his father, who offering advice in front of the grand­ d'var Hashem. Parents must realize the in the minds of his children came so children, contradicting their parents' lofty position that the Torah expects dose to fulfilling the statement of instructions to them, is lost through the them to maintain in the eyes of their Ghazal (quoted in Rashi, Parshas diminishing of the esteem of the young children. For this reason, the Torah Kedoshim): "One might think that one parents in the eyes of their own children. equates the honor given to parents to the can become (holy) like Me. The Children have to see their parents as honor that is to be given to Hashem. Torah teaches 'I am Hashem' - My the absolute authority, and grandparents This is the kind of chinuch we are holiness is higher than yours:' But that should never undermine that position. expected to give to our children. was the only difference. Even when grandparents are alone with Many have marveled at how my grandfather, Reb Yehuda Loeb Schwab ':>"Yr of Frankfurt-Am- Main, was able to raise five sons, 1 all of whom were true tzaddikim. One might consider the following incident, which depicts the respect and esteem in which the sons held their father: My father related to me how he was constantly observing his father during his davening in shul and benching at home. He and his brothers could Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Auerbach, zt1, was detect in his father tremendous Yiras one of the great Torah luminaries of this cen­ Shamayim and deep kavana. Every tury: a profound Torah scholar, an outstand­ beracha was made with sincere ing halachlk authority, a man of incredible thoughts ofHakadosh Baruch Hu. He kindness and Integrity. knew that his father, although a busi­ Now, in this uplifting and inspiring volume, nessman in daily life, was a tzaddik the life and times of Rav Shlomo Zalrnan come vividly to Ufe - through the words of - thinking of Hashem at every one of his devoted disciples. moment. Complete with photographs, anecdotes, One day, my grandfather had to wonderful insights and vignettes, conclude his breakfast quickly for an Tl£ MAN CF T1l1nH AN> PEACE paints a pro­ important business meeting. The found and memorable picture of greatness in Torah. 1Rabbl Shimon Schwab.,-::n (1908-1995) Rav, K'hal . . .- Adath Jeshurun, Rabbi Mordechai Schwab .,.::n (1911-1994) Mas/igiach, Bais Shraga (Monsey), Rabbi Moshe Schwab .,.::n ( 1914-1979) Mashgiach, FELDHEIM lfl PUBLISHERS Gateshead Yeshiva, Reb Chaim Tzvi Schwab ';.-::n Torah Literatu.re of Quality ( 1909-1997) London, England, Reb Yitzchok 200 Airpnrl Execulive Park, Nanuel, NY 10954 • Tel (914) 356-2282 • Fax (914) 425-1908 • E-mail [email protected] Schwab N.Y. (1910- ) Bnei Brak Toll Free: 800-237-7149 • Ask for our catalog.

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 25 parents, it is suggested that grandparents that he didn't feel comfortable sitting at come across when conveying their mes­ give advice sparingly. The motto should the head of the table. "The children are sage: who they are, what their life expe­ be the three "Shins" - "Schenken, getting the wrong message;' he said. riences have been, and what they have Schweigen, und Schlingen," give many "They should see their parents as the seen. Their accomplishments and their gifts and reserve comments. My late head of the household, not the grand­ spiritual nature are now being given over Uncle Reb Mordechai Schwab ':,.·::n told parents. After all, the children must learn to their grandchildren. me, "If one wants children to ask advice that the most important people in a on how to raise their children, then don't Torah home are parents." In a long term nllNJ 0'1llNm !!1'1J1J ;tl11 D'Jnl ll'N'JlJ 1T1J WN offer any advice." The more one offers, arrangement, however, where grand­ "WHO HAS CHOSEN GOOD PROPHETS the less the young parents are ready to parents live in their children's home, AND WAS PLEASED WITH THEIR ask questions. The less one offers, the much thought and consideration WORDS THAT WERE UTTERED WITH more they will be knocking on your should be given to the matter. TRUTH" - BIRCHAS HAHAFTORAH door for your sage advice. Those who e When children serve the table, they live far away from their children, with should serve their own parents first; the he Zeidy and Bubby are the "good very little opportunity to volunteer obligation of kibud av va' eim is unques­ prophets" whose goodness advice, will often receive a constant tionably a Torah obligation, whereas Tshould go beyond endearing gifts stream of telephone calls from children, there is a difference of opinion in the and embraces. The Zeidy and Bubby's with their chinuch problems. All Shulchan Aruch in regard to honoring greatest gifts should be that they com­ because the advice isn't offered so freely grandparents. (Some opinions maintain municate the truth of the Torah, saying: and frequently. that there is no Torah obligation; oth­ "This is emes, this is what we lived our ers say there is, but it is secondary to the life for:' Grandparents, who are much Some Practical Ideas: obligation to honor parents.) Parents more cognizant of the ephemeral nature on their own, of course, should be mech­ of man's sojourn on earth -that it's all e When grandparents are visiting in the abed their parents by passing their really "like a passing shadow" - can home of their children, the grandchil­ portion to the grandparents. convey more convincingly that what dren will observe how their parents give they are telling their grandchildren honor to the grandparents, seating N'Jl '"l!JD 1':>N-1'li'1 about the Torah is emes: "This is what them at the head of the table. When my "YOUR GRANDPARENTS - THESE ARE we are ready to die for and are prepared father ':>"::it visited us in Denver, we would THE BOOKS OF THE PROPHETS." to account for.... This is how we live with invite him to take a seat at the head of the hope for future." the table, as I had seen my father do with he Navi has a distinct role to play. Even the Torah teachings and the his father when I was a young boy. But While every Navi conveys the Torah ideas that they share with the those were always short visits. Once, Tmessage of Hashem, each one has grandchildren need to be vested with a however) my parents visited for two his own style of expression. The grand­ heavy measure of truth. For some 45 weeks. After a few days, my father said parents' individual personalities should years, my father ':>"::it, held to his "Hid-

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26 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 his absolute love and pursuit of en1es, its students; and that is the strongest • and his disdain for things that were lessons of emuna and bitachon in randparents, who ore lacking in truth. Hashem. My father, in his later years, said to us, "Life has its ups and downs, much more cognizant G TRUTHANDFAITH mir.iN1-l'11:l~ its difficult moments, challenges, dis­ of the ephemeral nature of appointments, and (G-d forbid) its randparents who personify emes tragedies. Just remember, the main man's sojourn on earth - will ultimately be their grand­ objective of a Jew is to develop in him­ that it's all really "like a Gchildren's best teachers for self a simple emuna in Hashgacha Prat­ emuna. For if we are the Nevi'im for our tis- that Hashem rules supreme over passing shadow" - con grandchildren, then they must get from every aspect of this world. We must learn us what the study of the Nevi'im gives to resist thinking 'We are doing it our- convey more convincingly that what they ore telling

their grandchildren about Mozeson/Malinowsk1 Advertising (201)801-0101 the Torah is emes .

den Years Theory"• regarding the miss­ ing 168 years of Jewish Chronology that he had expounded in many publica­ II tions. (See Selected Speeches.) And he defended it vigorously against those who l ~•.i. would attack it and question its validi­ ty. But at the end of his life, he published an epilogue to this theory of Compar­ ative Jewish Chronology, as follows: "It is because of all these annoying doubts that I have decided to put a big question mark after the words 'Jewish • Chronology.' Let somebody with greater knowledge come and pick up the threads where I left off. Our tra­ ditional, universally-accepted Jewish way of counting the years since the cre­ ation is sacred territory which only fools do not fear to tread upon. This may be a disappointment to some, but on the other hand, I muster the courage to belong to those who rather wish to be honest to themselves than to be right. I would rather leave a good question open than risk giving a wrong answer. The Shalom Task Force ~i(!}o "And I follow the teaching of R' Shi­ Abuse Hotline is endorsed by :;a.YI&~ mon in tractate Pesachim 52h who leading Orthodox Rabbonim. ...,.~.., said: 'Just as I was awarded for the Jf-.FOtt: research, so shall I be awarded for my withdrawal?" Confidential Hotline 7 1 8 3 3 7 3 7 o o He was prepared to withdraw a prin­ Collect calls accepted. cipal idea that he had held for some 45 Do it for yourself. years because he felt that it might not Do it for your children. be one hundred percent true. So was

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 27 selves: We have to know that everything damentals of Yiddishkeitto easy formu­ is determined in Shamayim. In this way, las. There certainly is a role for the sacred • one removes pain from himself; he will practices initiated by tzaddikim. But that f a person is careful about not get angry, he will not get jealous, and is after a person has done everything else. he will not hate. He will conclude, 'This If a person is careful about his tefilla; he Ihis tefilla; he strengthens his is the way it has to be. Thus is it deter­ strengthens his emuna and bitachon emuna and bitachon every mined in Heaven."' every day; he keeps a constant watch over his Torah and mitzvos; his kibud avva'eim day; he keeps a constant My father would teach his grandchildren and his interpersonal conduct are in watch over his Torah and interesting things: order, as is his integrity in business mat­ ters. If all of that is in order, then there mitzvos; his kibud av va'eim ne of his granddaughters are segulos, also. But he wished to and his interpersonal returned from Eretz Yisroel after impress upon her that there are no conduct are in order, as 1s Oa year in seminary, wearing "quick fixes" in Avodas Hashem (Divine around her wrist a souvenir of her visit service), but only the hard work of his integrity in business to Kever Rochel - "the Reuta Benda/eh," emuna, tefilla and self-improvement. the red string bracelet, so popular matters. If all of that is in among the young female tourists. After order, then there are his typical warmest welcome to his room, he asked her, "What do you have there?" ne of my daughters was prepar­ segulos, also. But he My daughter said, "They told me it's ing her children for a family wished to impress upon her a segula!' 0 wedding. She had dressed up "Let me see. What is it a segula for?" her five little daughters in identical dress­ that there are no "quick "For a shidduch;' she replied. es, and they looked delightful. She was fixes" in Avodas Hashem. He was silent. "Do you believe in the about to )eave the house when she won­ Ribbono Shel Olam?" he asked. "Do you dered: "Should I not be afraid of ayin think he needs a red string to help Him? hara?" She called up my father 'n in • Do you really think that the emuna and New York. '(Sabha," she said, "I'm afraid dishe simcha. There is a Ribbono Shel bitachon of a Jewish girl for a good shid­ to go out and display my children at the Olam in the world; what you are doing duch should be reduced to a red string wedding. They are so eye-catching, is proper. It's what Kial Yisroel has always bracelet?" they are so precious, five little girls in done in their celebrations. There is no There was no need for an answer. identical dresses!" need to fear, but only to rejoice in "Do you mind if I take it off?" And He dismissed her misgivings: "Say a thoughts of the kindnesses that Hashem he reached into his desk and took out Kapittel (Chapter) of Tehillim and have has bestowed upon us, and to a little scissors and asked again, "Do you no fear!" strenghthen our bitachon as we ask for mind?" His message was: This is the Jewish His protection. "No," she said. "I don't mind. Take way, isn't it? We go to a family simcha, it off." and the family dresses up the children 1'7v 77!im Nm wJJ ,~ She well understood the message. in the most joyous way possible. This "THE MAN IS A PROPHET AND HE WlLL This was consistent with what he had is normal! This is what has been done PRAY FOR YOU!' (BEREISHIS2~7) always taught: we must not reduce fun- by holy Jews in all times. Such is a Yid- nd finally, grandparents are to fulfill the primary role of the PINCHAS :MANDEL A Navi. The word "Navi" appears Over 45 years experience in Kvura in Eretz Yisrael for the first time in the Torah when Personal responsibility throughout service - NO AFFILIATES Hashem tells Avimelech that Avraham Originator of the present method - BEWARE OF IMPOSTERS "is a Navi and He will pray for you." Highly recommended by Gedolai Hodor- Here and in Eretz Yisrael Grandparents functioning in the role of 1569-47th Street, Brooklyn, NY 11219 the Navi have to constantly pray for chil­ dren and grandchildren, for their hatz­ & Day Night: phone: (718) 851-8925 lacha in all life's matters, for their 1VP'lJN1!llJNj7 ))l"j7 - 1'1:l 1Nl n11J::i)) '1lll health and for their prosperity. Chesed Shel EMES with Mesiras Nefesh ... as understood and practiced Kial Yisroel stands and falls upon the by one active in the industry for more than half a century. family heads' daveningfor their children. · TAHARAS HANLFTAR SHOULD NEVER BE COMMERCIAUZED - As the Mishna Berurah (47:10) says,

------28 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 "Fathers and mothers should constant­ chessed grandparents can perform for had a dream tbat was most disturbing. ly pray for their children, that they family, and for their offspring. He arose in the middle of the night and should be students of the Torah and When do we start davening for our said Tehillim and special tefillos until 5 tzaddikim with good character." Note children? I found in his diary a piece a.m., and then prepared himself for shul. that it does not say: "Torah giants:' Not of paper which he had written when his Later that day, he received a call from his every child is going to be a Gadol first grandchild was about to be born granddaughter who asked him whether b'Torah. When my father would extend over 40 years ago. He asked: her husband should say a Birchas a beracha at a bris or bar mitzva, he "Hashem, please lighten for my Hagomel, thanking G-d for saving their would say that the child should become daughter, Yehudis Bas Rochel, the son's life, since the boy was involved in "an ehrliche Yid," a tzaddik, a good and pain of pregnancy and pain of child­ a car accident the previous evening. He righteous and upstanding Jew, G-d-fear­ birth. Let her be spared The Verdict of was sideswiped, thrown a long distance, ing, with good middos - something Eve {a Kabbalistic concept]. Let the and landed on the pavement. The boy that every Jewish child can accomplish child emerge into the light of the world picked himself up and, after being in his life. Becoming a Gadol b'Torah without danger to the mother, without checked out at the hospital, was released. depends upon Siyata DiShmaya, a gift danger to the child, in a good and My father asked for all the exact details, from G-d. But it cannot be expected for blessed moment, for Mazel Tov." And and tben chuckled and said, "Now I every child. Of course, we need Gedolei he continued to charter, in his teftlla, understand;' and told his granddaughter Torah, but we don't get them wholesale. the entire life course of the child. "Let that he had had a dream, and Baruch "One out of a thousand will emerge as there be a live birth, for a long life, to Hashem his tefilloswere answered. In his a leader," and not every family will be worship You, sincerely and completely, diary on that very morning, he inscribed zocheh to one. But every parent and fn happiness. The child should serve the words that we can read today: grandparent has a right to hope - and You in good physical health, and good "Chalomos shov yedabeiru," which should pray - that their offspring be mental health for a long and peaceful means: "Dreams speak falsely," not moral, ethical and G-d-fearing people. life with good parnasa to support him­ wanting to attribute any significance to The Brisker Rav was asked, "How self with dignity." the dream or to his premonition. Rather, was it that you are so successful with The whole life of the child was chart­ he emphasized that dreams carry little your children?" The Brisker progeny all ed, before the child was ever even born. importance, and true significance lies in seem to be cut from the same cloth ... Tefilla is a tremendous source of constant tefilla of parents and grand­ children and grandchildren. "How strength of grandparents - nay, a duty parents for their offspring: those holy does one have so much hatzlacha with and responsibility of grandparents - on words and thoughts that will envelop the children?" behalf of their family. children at all times. May the zechus of He answered agitatedly, 'Hatzlacha! My father's tefilla for his grandchil­ the parents and grandparents who What do you mean (hatzlacha'? This is dren was intense. On the evening before include their children and grandcbildren surely a gift from G-d. This is the prod­ one of his great-grandchildren was in their prayers always stand by their off­ uct ofTehillim and tears. Nothing else involved in a car accident, my father had spring and by all of Kial Yisroel. • but prayer!"

A DIARY OF FORTY-THREE YEARS OF PRAYER I HAT PLUS I y father left a daily diary span­ ning the last 43 years of his ~#1~7M: M life ... 43 volumes of fascinating, rivetting and spellbinding entries. The • BORSALINO most stunning revelation is that it is •CLASSIC replete with tefillos and tears, from •PINELLI cover to cover. He wrote out his prayers for himself, for his family, for his com­ •STETSON munity, for Kial Yisroel. One can almost touch the tears that were poured there ... WE ALSO DRY CLEAN & RESHAPE HATS a stream of heart-wrenching tefillos (All work done on premises) that he formulated at every juncture, at moments of difficulty, in his own life as Please note our new address: well as others', pleading for G-d's mercy. 1368 Coney Island Avenue This perhaps is the main function and (718) 377-5050

------The Jewish Observer, April 1997 29

Leah Oriel ~~- srael really is a small country,fis operation in light of the tragedy. they say, so I suppose it was to '-(tI" '' ' Hashem Yisborach had given I be expected that of the 73 Kadouri stamina to continue his fa~aeli soldiers killed in .the col- Buy . ng life. Hashem would give all His hs10n of two army helicopters 1 people ko'ach to continue. over the Galilee the previous Mothers would continue to week, I would know someone .. mato es , n buy fruit and vegetables for their who knows someone.... 11 children. Mothers would con­ It turned out to be the 0 1 tinue to make decisions of cher­ nephew of my fruit-and-veg­ ry (sherry) vs. big tomatoes and etable man. A woman next to me orange vs. "regular" peppers. Avo­ at the check-out counter was talk- Jerusalem cados would be positioned appro- ing about the tragedy. "You remem­ priately according to their degree of ber the man who lives in the villa up the softness, and hopefully all of us would hill?" I didn't catch exactly what relation scrutinize our deeds as carefully as we he was to a victim, but the cashier, some­ got jostled by workers carting in examine groceries. one other than the usual grocer, added, crates of avocados. Kadouri shout­ "Also the son of Kadouri's sister," I ed, "The soft ones in the back and he death of these 73 soldiers was explaining why Kadouri himself wasn't the harder ones in the front:' Or did he not the first tragedy in Israel dur­ selling fruit and vegetables at his store say the opposite? I thought it really did­ Ting my 19 years living here. Only that morning. n't matter, but Kadouri had evidently a few months ago, Arab terrorists killed When I went to buy fruit again about returned to his daily routine. a Jewish mother and one of her eight a week later, Kadouri had returned. I I brought my bags of tomatoes and children in cold blood. These victims noticed there was a box full of "second peppers to Kadouri to weigh. Should I were the sister-in-law and nephew of my class" tomatoes at the entrance to the say something profound? What was daughter's gym teacher. store, the section for produce marked there to say? Maybe there was something She continued teaching gym after a down in price, the section I always head profound in his worrying about the soft week, and I continued reminding my for first. There was also posted a "Tza­ and hard avocados. daughter to bring her gym shoes to class. hal" notice announcing the death of I said nothing, but began to select"sug Does it matter? Yonatan Amadi. I suddenly didn't real­ bef' bananas to add to the vegetables he It matters. We're all continuing with ly feel like selecting tomatoes. had rung up. I had been comforted by G-d's help ... and G-d's promise that all There were regular tomatoes and everything proceeding as always. The this is a continuum on the road to cherry tomatoes (called "sherry toma­ scale certainly didn't change its mode of Moshiach, the ultimate comfort. • toes" in Hebrew). I'd usually be delight­ ed to find a bargain such as miniatures being priced even less than regular tomatoes. There were also a few orange LS TYPE OF CAR OR SIMILAR • JAN •1 i.. peppers.Another"metzia"! I would usu­ 31 ally jump at the chance to bring home lllJl!llll!lll!!lllililllll.. 1 1MA·R·••' I such novelty, today at the same price as A.. FIATUN.QSTING ...... '!,47 ~ ~ the ol' green and red peppers. (Even yel­ A' FIATUNO STING AIC ...... !Z..!5.. Iii !IC _e PEUG-~-0T_20_s_/PO-_-Lo-... 1-_,- .. 196 .,. Q; low peppers aren't unusual any more.) C MAZDA 121 RS 23a ~ 111 But what difference did it make? c" PEUGEOT 300·; MAZDA 323 _ 26<>_ "' -.. I was thinking ofYonatan Amadi. I'd .c' 'Pii~o 1.6 RS -=- .294 ~ 9 heard the radio broadcast the list of 73 M. MINIBU~£Q..fl0 10 SEA]ll. _6..~Q '' N KIA BESTA 8 SEATS 490 ~ 1 soldiers. Each name was recited with the age. Was my grocer's nephew 19 years USA& CANADA -~-D.. SUZUKY·~---0~ §_l!l_FT_ .. _~66 I'll Toll Free: ( 1) 800-938·5000 old, or was he one of the 20-year-olds? ~... _MAZO~.~.~•· 1.6 P.S ;115 ~I What difference did it make? F ' .. SUZUKYBA~~-... 35_Q 11j Q; Tel in NY: 212·629·6090 G_ '.SUBAR!Jl,EGACY1.8 __ 43'1,. l'lj ~ http://www.eldan.co.il/ K -~_Q~C VANDUR~·---· 84Q-· t ~ X '..C..ttEVROLETf_AVALIER_.. 497_ ~ .. Leah Oriel has been published in Horizons. A native _XL 'MAZO.A_~- .581 ::;:: of Chicago, she earned a BA in biology, and com­ _S_)( 'CHEVRQLETLUMINA 6!58 ... pleted the Teachers Training Program of Gateshead KX ' GMC SAFARI 938 "Sem" (England),and has lived in Jerusalem the past * POWER STEERING & ELECTRIC WINDOWS 19 years with her husband and family.

___ ,, ______The Jewish Observer, April 1997 31 SECOND LOOKS

The recent successful cloning of a sheep - the man-induced development of genetic material from a differentiated adult animal cell into a viable fetus that was subsequently born - leaves few obstacles to the application of such technology to humans. Some of the myriad questions of halacha that will attend the successful cloning of humans are obvious: Is the technology permitted? If so, under what circumstances? Will a clone have the halachic status of a genealogical child? Will cloning satisfy the mitzva of procreation? Is there a sibling relationship between fellow clones? Are the neshamos of a clone and its "source" identical? Other she'eilos may be more subtle but equally pressing. If and when the cloning of humans becomes reality, Orthodox Jews will tum, of course, to their gedolim and poskim, as they always have when new technologies produced new question and the need for their answers. Even at this stage, though, asserts Rabbi Avi Shafran, Agudath Israel's director of public affairs, the scientific breakthrough of mammalian cloning should stimulate us all to thought - not because it is such a novelty, but because it is such a reminder. Much Ado About Cloning New Frontiers and Old Miracles our full concentration. It is generally We know it as "Asher Yotzar." made several times daily, and hence per­ While most of the world may not beracha that some likely make too haps too easy a candidate for being treat­ regard bodily functions as religious hurriedly - and others even ed, chas v'shalom, lightly. It is, moreover, experiences, the Torah, which embraces A furtively - is one that should, on a praise of Hashem that might well seem the idea of sanctifying the mundane, the contrary) galvanize us and command somewhat odd to an outsider. directs us Jews to take a moment each M~~ ~-t' Mi~M ' j~~~'M ~T"iN ~ ril 'WI Jl:l"ll Jl"llC , \=n i)MO U'n,,, hlft l'niro •The Z'chvs of Living, Breathing and Experiencing the Kedusha of Eretz Yisrael • The Torah Touring Experience of a lifetime! •Kosel •Climb Matsada •Inspiring hi r~;ltlllll n"WI ro hi ~~p 1l"Ul'I ro Shiurim • Shabbos in Tezfas • Teveria • Meron •Amazing Workshops• Kevrei Tzadikim • 1 --~~ ...... ~- Amukoh •Meet Gedo/ei Yisrael •Experience Yerushalayim in Depth• Delicious Hotel hi ~r!IP ""l.i ro hi 'i'=:rli' "'"llM ro Style Meals• Swim in the Kinneret • Shabbos in Yerushalayim • Kay~k in the Yarden • 1 ,..,,_..,~ ...... l"jll'tlt Rosh Hanikra •Fully Equipped Modern Gym• Underground Caves• Eilat •Glass BoHom I">< 1"'!1111"'1 -~ ro Boat • Air Conditioned Dining Rooms • Banana Boating • Ein Gedi • Biblical Zoo • I _...... - Waterparks • Har Haziseim • Beautiful Campus & Dormitory • Snorkling • Paddle ('118) 871-8651 Boating• Campfire• Tour the Galif •Daven Va'sekin at Kosel• light & Sound Desert I Experience •Golan Heights• Gamla • Cable Cars• Be' er Sheva •Make Wonderful International Friends • Yad Vashem • Swim in Yam Hamelach • Bedouin Tents • I Decoupage• Climb Incredible Mountains• Achdus • Tzipori •Aris & Crafts• Our Own Oly_mpic Pool• Grape Picking• Har Hamenuchos • Shmiros Halashon Rally• Rabbi lev I Leff• Ancient Susya •Hotel Sarei Yisrael in Yerushalayim •Hotel Hamerchazi in Tzefas • Rabbi Aryeh Schechter Hotel El Artzei in Eilat • Kanyan Ha'adom •Silk Screening• Meo Shearim • Rebbe's Tisch • Flower & fruit Decoration • Camel Rides • Color War • Kever Rachel • Kever 1 Dovid Hamelech • Mearaf Luzit • Meorot Chazon • Nochal Amud Nature Trail• Climb I SOFER S''TAM Sand Dunes • Mearaf Hakemoch • Degem Beis Hornik.dash • Klei Hamishkon • Hay Rides• Banyas• Mock Wedding• Swim in Hatzbanei River• Sunset Kumzitz by the I 155841stSt. Ocean •Cave of the Chashmonaim •Orange Picking• and Much, Much More! 8-ldyn, NY 11118 •Just Ask ~ of our Wonderful Machane Bracha Campers! ,,,,,~

I A Safe, Secure, Warm Atmosphere in Magnificent Yad Blnyamin Under the Direction of Rabbi Sholom & Mrs. Chaya Glnzberg I L 1066 £ 23rd Street Brooklyn, NY 11210 (718}377-0234 • ------32 ------The Jewish Observer, April 1997 time nature has ca1led to direct our tainly potential problems inherent in the Is that, though, really what amazes thoughts heavenward. The beracha, of proliferation of the new technology. here ... or is the true source of wonder course, is essentially a paean to the intri­ But the degree of wide-eyed wonder the working of DNA itself? In fact, isn't cate workings of our biological systems. at Dolly bas Dolly the sheep, and the the more mundane, natural technique "Blessed are You, Hashem ... Who creat- painstaking, inspired process she of two parents' DNA combining to form ed mankind with wisdom ..." embodies is, I think, somewhat out of a new generation that represents a It is, unfortunately, all too easy these place. combination of both its progenitors in jaded days to overlook even more The technical hurdles that the sci­ reality even more astounding? prominent blessings than those occur­ entists cleared were considerable by all Once upon a time, heart trans­ ring unseen in the depths of our bod­ accounts, and the results they achieved, plants, too, were flabbergasting. But, at ies or on the molecular level. Those of unprecedented. But what they essen­ least to thoughtful folk, they were never us who are not in immediate danger of tially did was coax DNA - the mirac­ remotely as amazing as hearts. starving nor in the path of a maraud­ ulous molecule that codes for biologi­ The fearsome ethical issues sur­ ing army don't stop often enough to cal traits and through which living rounding cloning will have to await the regard just how special, from a histor­ things replicate - to do precisely what rulings of poskim. It would be sad, ical perspective, our lot is; how fortu­ it does all the time. though, if, in the rush to worry and nate we really are. weigh and make decisions, the recent We tend to perk up only at something The True Miracle: Everyday DNA Activity developments on the cutting edge of new. Were we suddenly able to fly or biology didn't leave us with a deeper read minds or travel through time - ah, dmittedly, the recently much­ consciousness of the multitudinous would we marvel at the miraculousness heralded replication of mam­ miracles we experience daily- indeed, of it all! And yet the daily workings of Amalian genetic blueprints took moment by moment- in this astound­ the very bodies we inhabit do equally place under highly unusual circum­ ing world of ours. astounding things, more and more of stances. Normally, only DNA from spe­ What a radically different place it which become apparent, the more sci­ cific generational cells is involved in the would be, in other words, were all of us ence learns. process that results in a new organism as deeply impressed with our genetic "Asher Yo tzar'' comes to mind amid - and it generally comes, of course, material itself as we are with its manip­ all the clone-talk oflate. Most of the dis­ from a pair of parents. What has now ulation, were each and every one of us cussion has revolved around the ethical been accomplished is that entirely iden­ to not only pause but stand in awe out­ issues brought to the fore by the recent tical DNA, though from a cell not usu­ side restrooms, eyes lifted heavenward, successful cloning of mammals, and the ally involved in reproduction, has been and recite "Asher Yotzar" b'kavana removal of any intrinsic obstacles to persuaded to develop into a new gen­ shleima, in profound gratitude for the similar replication of humans. Such eration, one necessarily identical to its Divine gifts that are the very rudiments deliberation is necessary; there are cer- sole parent. of our biologies. •

f? 18 Final Swim ~parture.a!J & Packing ornn o:mia

24- 25

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 33 "\T'YESH 0MRIM ... AND THERE ARE THOSE THAT SAY. .. "

A Parent's Agony

ur community prides itself fore­ other programs in which we can all ing they finally did. Having been told most with how we take care of pride ourselves. that his application would be held in the 0 our most precious asset--our Then whom am I talking about? yeshiva for the next year, I waited in vain children. As true as this is, I am afraid Children who don't fit into the mold of for a call to be reinterviewed. It never that there is one group of children that the perfect child. I know this from per­ came. I thought it was a mistake, so I are being woefully neglected. Our reg­ sonal experience. I must therefore called the yeshiva and was told that his ular children get an education that can't remain anonymous. folder wasn't in the file and registration be duplicated in the secular world. Each My youngest child had slight neuro­ was closed. This, mind you, was in the yeshiva tries to out-do the other as to logical problems in infancy which left month of December! how much material our little geniuses him with labored speech and clumsy I was frantic. Didn't this child deserve cover in one year. The competition movements. He has above average intel­ an education? Why can't he be given a between yeshivas is fierce as to who will ligence as verified by IQ tests given every chance? The door was closed in my face produce more future Roshei Yeshivas. few months due to his condition. His so quickly that I couldn't even explain Our handicapped children are being rniddos are second to none. anything about him. Now I had to start well taken care of. There is HASC, When the time came to register him, a renewed search for a yeshiva, but how Mishkon, P'TACH and a variety of I had no idea that there would be a prob­ can this be done at such a late stage? lem, as he was a sibling of very successful Since he did have a slight problem, I older talmidim. I thought the policy of refused to put him in a "factory style" ...::::-:;. the yeshiva was clear; that siblings get yeshiva because I knew that he would priority. Having developed what I get lost there. I looked for a yeshiva with \\" I . thought was an open relationship, I was a good name. After hitting a few dead B~"c nve1 very frank about my son's situation. I ends) I finally was granted an interview really didn't think that yeshivas judge for a Tuesday morning. Not mention­ children according to their athletic ing he had a problem, I held my breath. ~~rHagefen prowess. At the interview, however, I was tfl The Shidduch service coldly told to go to a special school. I e walked in at 9:30, and the L for older singles then walked through Bora Park in grilling started. How much tears wondering that, if a person in chin­ W can you test a four-year-old? A project of N'shei Agudath Israel uch cannot accept him, how would the One, two, three hours. There was no end with Agudath Israel of America average person? in sight. At the end of the interview the 6619 13th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11219 Now came the catch 22. Since he was principal looked at me and said, "We Tel. (718) 256-7525 •Fax (718) 256-7578 so bright, Special Ed had a hard time would love to have him, but tell me, is accepting him, but with a lot of coax- there something you are not telling us?)'

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34 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 I told him what the problem was and our gifted? Are our yeshivas telling us ing of scorn. Their middoswill definitely he looked at me with disappointment. that a klutz of average intelligence does suffer. They must be taught to be B'nei He was upset, so I told him that the rea­ not deserve a quality education? Beside Rachmanim and must learn tolerance. son I didn't say anything beforehand was cheating that child, we are also cheating Every yeshiva must teach gemillas chas­ that the yeshivas had taught me to be our other children by teaching them that sodim and it must start in the fror.t devious. Had I told him the truth, he anything less than perfection is deserv- office. • probably wouldn't have given him an interview. He looked insulted, but I real­ ...... ,,~3 ly didn't care. I finally had my precious baby in a good yeshiva. CC JS EVERY GIRL'S DREAM. .. People in similar situations seem to The Best Summer in Israel camping I touring program gravitate to each other. From these peo­ for frum girls ages 10-17 Call today, tor early ple, I've learned several important registration discount. things. My opinion of the "factory Six Weeks Of Over 22 Exciting Tours, Daily Shiurim, style" yeshiva has mellowed somewhat. Drama, Music, Dance, Arts & Crafts And The Special "-"'~llT Spirit Which Is The Hallmark Of The BCC Program. They tell me that their children's class­ ~ ~ ""' mates have been wonderful and have On Campus: Waterpark, Large Pools, Water Slides, ~ learned to show respect to a challenged Midreshes L'Mitzvos Hatluyos B'aretz. Dairy Farm, '!Iii\\'~~ individual. Zoo, Sports Fields. And So Much More. ~"\ However, it still doesn't mean that a ~" large yeshiva is good for these children Join The Hundreds Of Girls Who Have Enjoyed Touring ~ Eretz Yisroet, With The Zelman Family Since 1986. .CI who can easily get lost in the crowd. Peo­ ,,,,~"" ple will argue that these children belong "''1 in a special program. Doctors and psy­ ~ :.-.; f'I fl chologists disagree, saying that this can CAMP BNOS CHOFETZ CHAIM only further damage the child's self. 623 CORTELYOU RD.· B'KLYN N. Y. 11218 (718) 282-6350 esteem. Functioning in a regular pro­ gram makes them feel like everyone else, and they also see what is expected of them in the real world. These children need to be accepted. A child does not need a special program because he needs three extra minutes or a sentence rephrased. rip t seems as though the yeshivas are ix weeks of touring in a secure and safe atmosphere throwing away our most cherished for a select group of Bais Yaakov girls ages 17 ·21. I gifts. Luckily, my son is bright. S What happens to a child like him whc uchnius instilled through daily shiurim by is only of average intelligence? Why R well-known C':lln1'. should a good education be reserved for ccommodations will be in a beautiful modern A dormitory in C' ?w11.,. xperienced tour guides and wonderful ni::i"1,r..l. We welcome back Naomi Chait of ~xperience Send for E Camp Shira to our super staff. eadership · The tour wiH be personally The Year "MISHLEI NOTES" supervised by Sheila Schwebel, well In Israel" L known for her touring expertise. Her deep love of Eretz Yisroel is inspiring In Six part one, with a sample tape. to those who come under her influence. Weeks $10.00 to Our 17th Summer With YESHIVA FUND New York Coordinator l.T.T PO Box 82 Mrs. Esther Biberfeld Staten Island, NY 10309 (718) 435-7575 Free sample if you (718) 258-2622 teach sefer Mishlei. Interviews now in pro ress

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Simcha' dik Search

hen I spotted the bag of what if it was only enough to comple­ berg around anyway in case I ran out of washed lettuce with the ment one meal? It was worth it. the pre-inspected kind. W Kashrus symbol in the upper Never again would I squint up at the right-hand corner, I couldn't wait to buy light, meticulously inspecting each leaf t was a good thing. On Sunday, my it for Shabbos. So what if it cost three in search of a bug. Never again would son and his wife of seven weeks decid­ times the price of a head of iceberg? So I keep my guests waiting an extra half I ed to join us for dinner. I'm trying to hour before eating. And I wouldn't have give them their own space. "But I have to leave the shul kiddush early to start so many leftovers;' I told them. It would the salad. Pre-inspected lettuce, com­ be a waste not to help us finish them!' plete with a reliable hechsherwould free Leftover ribs (our Friday night special­ me forever - so I thought. ty), chicken, and kugel jumped out at me As I dumped the contents into a bowl from the fridge, but not prewashed for the first Shabbos lunch, I was ecsta­ salad. My new daughter-in-law loves salad tic. "I just need to add tomatoes and and since I love her, I decided to tackle cucumbers," I told my new daughter-in­ the untouched head of lettuce. law. The next week I did the same thing. I banged off the core to make it eas­ What a breeze. But I kept a head of ice- ier to separate the leaves and held up the first leaf to the light. Not only didn't I Mrs. Grossblatt of Atlanta is a frequent contribu­ tor to Torah Umesorah's Jewish Parent Connection. find a bug, but I didn't mind looking for This is her first appearance in these pages. one. Wait until I do more of this, I

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38 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 thought. But looking at each leaf did­ the cleaning, scrubbing, and cooking for I use the pre-washed lettuce n't bother me as it usually did. In fact, Pesach, I thought about slavery in gain? Absolutely. I've used it I felt a sense of jubilation. Was check­ Egypt: searching for straw to make ready. It's still the easiest way ing lettuce a mitzva to miss? bricks, building cities for Pharaoh. I to prepare salad for Shabbos. I probably This was strange. I thought back to knew that getting ready for Pesach was won't use it for the seders-the pieces don't Pesach when I had eight heads of a different servitude, but I was too tired seem big enough and the price would be Romaine lettuce to inspect. They were to appreciate the difference. extravagant. But I won't buy my lettuce at all from the Farmer's Market- cheap­ Only now as Pesach approaches Farmer's Market. I'm not that crazy. With er and fresher - but they were also again do I understand - a little. That eight heads sprayed well at the local super­ crawling with bugs, as I discovered two true service to Hashem is with simcha, market, however, searching for bugs hours before sundown. I had never seen even searching lettuce. It's crazy, but should be easy. I'm almost looking forward anything like it before, and I was so tired. it's true. to it - and that's unbelievable. • I really didn't know what to do. There wasn't a choice; we needed lettuce for the seder. I began to inspect and wash each leaf of each head. My daughters helped. It took quite a while. What do you think At that time, fully exhausted from all

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·------·--···---··------The Jewish Observer, April 1997 39 - • ''With and .,, ~'. ! , 11 "·, 'Great Chasm' Separated ·'' Jews from Jews, Too

I

The following is an excerpt from an article that was featured "For the first time, I was more afraid for my safety from Orthodox Jews than in the Pittsburgh Jewish Chronicle (Feb. 13, '97), followed I was from Al Fatah;' Rabbi James Gib­ son, spiritual leader of Temple Sinai told by a letter to the editor that appeared in a subsequent issue: The Chronicle following his return from the fourth American Reform Zionists Association (ARZA) Rabbinic Mission to Israel held last month. Rabbi Gibson was referring to his visit to Ramallah, hosted by the local Al Fatah head Marwan Barguti, and to the ARZA visit to the Western Wall where the Reform rabbis were subjected to great hostility from ultra-Orthodox Jews. Barguti welcomed the 49 Reform rabbis and "talked like he was a peace­ A Project of Agudath Israel of America offering ... ful man." The ARZA group was confronted Shiurim, lectures, shabbatonim, yeshivas, with shouted insults when they went as referrals & spiritual advice. a mixed group of men and women rab­ bis to pray at the Western Wall. The • SHABBOS MINYAN, 9:00 A.M. Israeli police and Army were on the alert For Young Adults Followed by Shiur & Kiddush and surrounded the Reform rabbis, who were subjected to verbal abuse and angry • BRISSIM FOR INFANTS & ADULTS (No Cha

• SUMMER CAMPS To the Editor: Boys ages 12-16/Girls ages I l-15 Rabbi Gibson speaks of the great chasm between Jew and Jew. But who VISIT OR CALL: Sunday - Thursday 3-6 p.m. created the chasm, the traditional 1566 Coney Island Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11230 Orthodox or the Reform with their uni­ Phone (718) 692-0079 •FAX (718) 252-5159 lateral changes and their excesses in trampling upon everything that has Please disseminate this information to your been holy to Jews ever since we became Russian friends and neighbors. a people? And then demanding accep­ tance and validation?

40 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 The area of the Wailing Wall has been women from praying there - speak of Yes, when insensitivity breaches all consecrated as a place of traditional, women's rights! - for another, it still bounds of respect towards history and Orthodox worship, ever since it was built affects the character of the place. tradition, towards all that has been sanc­ almost 3,000 years ago. Indeed there Beyond which, the belief is widespread tified over thousands of years, often with were separate courtyards for women and that the Reform service was only a wedge blood and martyrdom, there will indeed for men in the holy Temple that King whose goal is to try and change the be hostility. It is the Reform who are the Solomon built. It has been hallowed by entire character of this holy site. interlopers and the aggressors at the the centuries of Orthodox Jews who ls there no place in the hearts and Wall. To paraphrase Abba Eban's cherished the wall and went to the great­ minds of the reform for any sensitivity famous speech to the U.N.: "There is est lengths to be able to pray at the wall. and respect to history and tradition, to hostility and aggression at the Wall. But In 1938, an uncle of mine went to pray the generations who came before us for the Orthodox are not its authors, they at the wall on the eve of Rosh Hashana all these centuries; is there no sensitiv­ are its victims!" in the face of danger and was killed by ity to all the thousands of Orthodox Jews Y. A. jUDELSON an Arab bullet, while the Reform were still who worship and pray there regularly? Pittsburgh, PA erasing every mention of Zion and Jerusalem from their prayer books. The Reform establishment was not even interested in Israel until more recent years. Does anyone remember the late, unlamented [Reform arm] Amer­ ican Council for Judaism? Since its liberation in 1967, tens of thousands of Orthodox Jews have been praying there constantly and the area is officially recognized as a synagogue always run on traditional lines. It is the Reform who are the intruders, who are The new crown jewcl ot Flatbush At K.eMer Dais Yaakov, extracur- doing the provoking and creating is Kesser Rais Yaakov. Finally ricular activities are integrated into chasms by trying to force alien modes there is a high school with a unique school life and foster creativity and vision for the community, and a clear sense individuality. The faculty is supple- of worship on that hallowed ground and of direction for its talmidos. mented by a special coordinator for in the face of the Orthodox people who In the truest tradition of Bais Yaakov, G.O., drama, choir, dance, debating, pray there on a regular basis. It is the Kesser's faculty, steeped in Yiras • orchestra, as well as Shabbatonim and Reform who are invading what has Shomayim, offers individualized · Melave Mal~. attention and inspires each student to Give your daughter every advantage. At always been an Orthodox precinct. reach her full potential in Limudei Kesser Bais Yaakov, she will become a The wall and the plaza in front of it Kodesb. true Bas Yisroel while being empowered to belong to every Jew. But a Reform Jew The fully accredited secular studies department meet the challenge of the contemporary world. can worship at an Orthodox syna­ features all the coursework necessary for an aca­ KESSER BAIS YAAKOV­ demic diploma plus innovative programs in WHAT FLATBUSH HAS BEEN gogue, whereas an Orthodox Jew can­ Computer Science, Graphic Design, Art, WAITING FOR! not worship or pray at a Reform tem­ Accounting and First Aid. A.P. credits will be ple. What the Reform are trying to do given in the twelfth grade. For more infonnafion call 718-436--431 L at the Wall will in fact disenfranchise the Orthodox Jews to whom the Wall has 1be new Bais Yaakov in Flatbusb. been so hallowed and special all these years. The new Bais Yaakov fer Flatbusb. The argument that the Reform held their mixed service behind the mechitza is besides the point. For one thing, it would still prevent any Orthodox Rabbi Yehuda Cahan KeSSer• Mrs. Malkie Machlis Senior Faculty Member B\IS \\\KO\ Supervising Prlndpai nr.tw l"ll'll!l"I? ~ Tftth l'tl Ltmudei Kodesb ,.,,n "ll>:i 718.436.4311 Mr.>~ ~-·· tl'"n '"l '" 1::l WARMLY ENDORSED BY RAV AVROHOM PAM SHLITA, ROSH YESHIVA/TORAH VODAATH 'C'll111'lm~il~l?> AND RAV DOVID FEINSTEIN SHLITA, ROSH YESHIVA/MESIVTA TIFERES JERUSALEM

-··-----···--·------····-··-······--···- ····-···--·····-- The Jewish Observer, April 1997 41 A Pound of Cure In the May and October '96 issues of The Jewish Observer, Rabbi Yakov Horowitz wrote about effective steps teachers and parents can take to prevent non-conforming teenagers from becoming drop-outs from yeshiva society. The discussion provoked much comment and response, far beyond any anticipation. That focused on "The Ounce of Prevention." What can one do for teen-age dropouts after the fact? Is there a formula for a Pound of Cure?

The Jewish Observer invited Rabbi Horowitz to write an article on this topic, and he responded with the following narrative, which was reported to him by a colleague who shares his dedication to helping dropouts re-enter the society that they had left.

To protect the identity of the principals, no names are used. The narrative by Rabbi Horowitz is written in the first person, representing the words used by his fellow mechanech, "Rabbi Reuven Zev Schwartz."

he phone rang. A woman was call­ her and physically removed her from the teen times." ing to discuss her concerns room, threatening her with bodily harm Fifteen times six (days) equals nine­ Tregarding her seventeen-year-old if she dares enter again. "Rabbi ty comments per week. Ninety times six son. After a minute or two) she began Schwartz," she cried, "My son is the weeks totals five hundred and forty hurt­ sobbing uncontrollably as she described sweetest child you could imagine. It's like ful attacks on her son's self confidence. his downward slide throughout his a dibbuk got into him. I'm afraid that he I explained to the woman that although mesivta years: the "bad friends;' the con­ is becoming clinically depressed. What her son's disrespectful behavior is inex­ stant bickering with his parents over should I do?" cusable, she must keep in mind that her dozens of issues, large or small, the ten­ At this point, it was obvious to me son is in as much agony as she is-per­ sion and friction with his siblings, being that due to the mother's distress, a seri­ haps more so: He feels that no yeshiva asked to leave the four yeshivas that he ous, protracted discussion was impos­ actually wants him, and that he has had attended during those three years. sible. After a few more minutes of con­ nowhere to go. Each time that you Now he had hit rock bottom. versation, I hung up the phone, with remind him of this painful fact, you are During the past six weeks, he refused the promise of returning the call as inadvertently causing him needless to even consider enrolling in yet anoth­ soon as possible. anguish, and adding to the chasm that er yeshiva: He sleeps until noon, "hangs exists between you and him. His anti­ around the house" until suppertime, *** social behavior is his clumsy response then, with a curt farewell, leaves the to his perception (real or imagined) that house. He returns in the early hours of ater that evening, I began the sec­ our society has rejected him. the morning, goes to sleep, and begins ond conversation by asking the After extracting a promise from her the day in the same fashion as the pre­ Lwoman how many times she had to refrain from any further barbs direct­ vious one. Any attempt by his parents asked her son - that day- any of the ed to her son, I offered to meet him in to determine where or with whom he following questions: my home. I told her to simply inform is spending his time, meets with a dis­ "Why aren't you going to yeshiva?" her son that I am a placement counselor, respectful or downright rude retort. Her "Why are you wasting your time?" who assists teenagers. voice became practically inaudible as she "When are you finally going to do described the events of that particular something with your life?" morning. She had entered his room in She mumbled an evasive response. I a futile attempt to wake him up for politely informed her that it would be andsome, well-dressed, young Shacharis. He became verbally abusive simply impossible for me to assist her man swaggered into my study. to her, and ordered her out of his room. without her complete cooperation. She Af fter making small talk for a few When she refused to leave, he swore at hesitantly answered, "About ten or fif- minutes, I began by discussing his sec-

42 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 ular education. He has only completed "I refuse to waste my life. If I am not He then admitted that throughout the second year of high school (he main­ going to be successful in school, I'm bet­ the past few difficult and stressful tained an 85 average), and he is currently ter off just not going at all." months, he has not had one serious con­ not enrolled in any program at all. I We sat quietly for a few moments. I versation with his parents. All dialogue asked him ifhe has any computer skills; then told him, "You never told this to takes place in midst of a shouting match he answered that he does not. I chided your parents in the manner that you are about any one of a host of flash points him fornot pursuing his quest for ahigh speaking to me now:) in their relationship. school diploma, or at least to attain a "How do you know?" he angrily G.E.D. (an equivalency diploma). He asked me. was very agreeable, and we spent several I softly responded, "That's obvious. minutes discussing his options. They keep asking you to go to yeshiva. I changed the subject. We then shifted the conversation to You have convinced me in a few minutes "Nice shirt you're wearing." his limudei kodesh (religious studies) that with your current mind set, you will "Thanks." pursuits. He grew visibly agitated as we be unable to achieve success in any yeshi­ "How much did it cost you?" discussed the reasons for his failure to va. You haven't done that with them yet:' "Twenty four bucks. It's a forty do!- achieve success in yeshiva. He conced­ ed that he was often uncooperative and had had "an attitude" during his past two school placements, despite having car­ ing rabbe'im who truly tried to com­ municate with him. I then probed into the current situation. Registration is now open forthe summer program of 5757 which will be held NH in Yerusholayim. «Why don't you make a serious effort to find a yeshiva where you can Once again, the program which has been recommended and endorsed by Gedolei Yisroel, will grow intellectually?" I asked. present an intensive course of study, prepared for Bnei Torah to enable them to develop their full "No yeshiva wants me; and even if I potential as Mechanchim in Yeshivas and Day Schools. got accepted, I'm just not cut out for learning." Our dedicated staff of Roshei Yeshiva, professional Rabbeim, and prominent Mechanchim, will I informed him that I disagree with present the full range of subjects vital to the success of the rebbe in the classroom. We invite moti­ both statements. Besides, I asked him, vated individuals possessing higher Yeshiva and (or) Kollel education, to participate in this program. "What do your parents say to this?" "My mother said that I should join Recognized for a Yeshiva Teacher's License a yeshiva; any yeshiva and just shuckel, For further infonnation contact so that I can find a decent shidduch.'' RABBI HILLEL MANDEL, Dean RABBI NACHMAN ZAKON, Administrator RABBI CHAIM ROBERTS NY (718) 805-1191 "What do you say to this?" I asked. Jerusalem 02-651-9739 England 161-740-3465

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------···------·------·--···---- The Jewish Observer, April 1997 43 lar shirt but I got it at a closeout." -.~t:his choice of destina\i·on. A phone call "If you truly don't care what people "How many hours did you have to. · :home before his parents' bedtime think, it shouldn't be a problem." I ham­ work to pay for that shirt?" I innocent- .. informing them that he is safe, and will mer home the point. "You care greatly ly asked. ..'be returning home at....will help calm what your friends think of you. What "Whadda you mean? My parents give · lheirperves. Additionally, he should be you have made peace with, is insulting me ...." more considerate of his parents' feelings your parents in front of their friends:' Ignoring the now hostile stare, I· when·engaging in antis9cial behavior in informed him that aside from the mitz- · Of near their home. This last comment **' va of kibbud av va' eim, common decen- : :drew· a swift and passionate response. cy would require that as long as he is · .. : «I couldn't care less what anyone ime for a break I went out and spending his parents' money, and eat- thinks of me!" he forcefully said. made myself a coffee. We went for ing at their table, he should inform them · "In that case, why don't we exchange Ta walk. I asked him what yeshiva of his whereabouts when he leaves home clothing with each other?" I ask with a he plans to send his boys to. He at night - even if they will be annoyed sniile (I wear traditional chassidic garb). responds with the name of a Brooklyn yeshiva, similar to the one that he attended as a child. (I'm not surprised; Q. that is what most "drop-out teens" tell When a Ben Toralt: me. To the public at large, however, this Wants to Prepllfi!'.;;~,,, response would meet with widespread ,,· - ... ,,·' disbelief.) "Are you aware that your par­ fora Career ents are convinced that you are on the path to becoming a mechallel Shabbos?" Where Can He~? I gently ask him. "Chas v'Shalom," was his immediate and passionate response. "No way - A. i1i1l'1'? tvi,r.:ll"l l°'":J they don't think that... do they?" "You see, when I - and your parents Hebrew Theological C~llege;1~~okie,Jllinois, now in its - went to yeshiva, dropping out of 75th year ofTorah leader~is oft'ering apanwsa­ school was almost immediately followed oriented second major op~'ai;J)art of its Bachelor of by an abandonment of Torah and mitzvos." Arts in Judaic Studies: .~ §lmpUf6t and Information I told him that informing his parents Science major, with a c~OJI in computer network- of his ironclad commitment to Yid­ ing...... ·.. . dishkeit would reduce their anxiety, greatly- and immeasurably lower the tension level at home. I then advised him • Genuine w-i-r~ n•::i atm9sp·~~ ~the tone for the entire to go home, take the phone off the hook, program · ·: ::: · · · and have a long talk with his parents about the many issues we had discussed. • Three IJ'"l'lt> oflearuin~~·,: •. ·. . .· • State-of-the-Art Pentl~~-c~riiputer laboratory :· :,,:.· .. ·' ;... :_f!;:J<,.~:- '' ' ' ' ' - • Integrated Liberal Arti; and'~ences and Computer and fter he left my house, I called his Information Science C!'mi~ parents and gave them a quick ''./':;·r-~,_. , -,. primer on dealing with their son's Spacious suburban ca!llp)J~;~. fW1 ®rmitory facilities A • -;___ :;:- _";. _:-:)>>:-:·>:»_:' ' ' ' crisis of confidence: • Program designed to1ll'.e,ff~.:~eitts for a car~ or • "Ein chovush matir atzmo mibais Graduate School - -- ;, ::'. ' asurim1" (A prisoner cannot extract himself from his bondage without the Our instructors have a proven_ ttdc~.-~®l'ti fer preparing s!udents for suc­ cessful careers in the expanding, _l'ji(:rgtive.jields of computer _and informa­ assistance of others). Don't hesitate to tion science, programming, ne!Wf!f:f

------~ .. ------~-- --- 44 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 . '. )- ----:,_:--

"p·-- and speak frankly with. Few teenagers, • Finally, think pos1t1ve. The vast 'achieve his high school diploma. By the even in the best of situations, can do this majority of these teens outgrow thi~· )vay, he added, things are much less with their parents. temporary stage in their Jives.. (bne is .. ' .stressful at home now. I smile, and reminded of the classical story ofthe six'·'· . thank the Ribbono Shel Olam for guid­ e Establish an ongoing dialogue with him. That includes, but should not be teen yearo!d who, after rt\ontlisof thn,. •·,·1 ing me in formulating the proper limited to, serious discussions about pre­ sion and fighting with his parents,,raµ . responses in helping this young man. sent yeshiva and/or work possibilities, away from home for a period of three ; I'm especially appreciative because I aspirations for the future, etc. years. Upon Teiurning home; he know that every situation requires a dif- remarked to his'close friend that he just fercnt response. And even then, not all e Never discuss serious issues during an can't get over how much his parents situations end this well. argument. matured during the time that he $ · . I sit down to eat supper. away.) Your son may not become evefy- Th h · · • Never, ever, engage in vicious, per­ . e p one rmgs agam ..... a thing that you had originally hoped fot .. sonal attacks on your son's friends him, but... he will, with the help ,of · when their names come up during an Hashem, grow to be' a wonderful adult; argument. Firstly, despite your instruc­ a source of nachas to himself, to you, arid tions to the contrary, every word that to Kial Yisroel. you utter will unquestionably be repeat­ ed to that friend. You will have earned yourself a sworn enemy, at a time *** when you need every ally you can get. Additionally, bear in mind that, at this stage in your son's life, he is more close­ ly aligned with his friends than he is with you. By attacking his friends, you are positioning them - and him~ on the opposing side of a very formidable fence.· •Don't beat up on yourselves as parents. ("Where did we go wrong?") Nothing productive at all will be accomplished by this. The brutal reality is that these situ~ ations arise in every type -of home and at every income level. More important­ ly, doing this in front of your son will only Now, th'f,£irfect way 7fe~'~ifi,t,~teview the day's Daf .. add to his feeling of inadeqµacy. the week'&'.J:Jafini ... ofevbiJ(ivWiiole Mesechta in clear and e After some time has passed, and you' concise English lahgutige\SIJi~riffl. have established a working relationship, set a firm, but reasonablc set of house rules for him, regarding his leaving - . IT'STJME~ORMlsTER n AF and returning- home at night. You will · . .· ... · ' • ·, c .. ' .• •'Eacb·tJ~~~lld ~its entirety, translated, and be pleasantly surprised by his response. '""'...-.. '-'" ''; e:q,litinid,sftiWiy and clearly in just 20 minutes • Explain to him that you are willing c~~;~5'~ •'(tt'iit}u!tas.Ummary) to make some accommodations to f • 4·5 blatt p~f ilpe meet the needs of his current lifestyle. . ~A rape srfJ_iett H( rl-r Slobodka Yeshiva • Berachos Sb.

The Jewish Observer, Ap61 1997 45 ------~11!j.;\;!ll!i!~lill-----•R•a•b•b•i•S•h•im-on-F.in•k•e•lm-a.n Affluence or Attitude?

A MATTER OF FASHION encompasses not only hem, neck lines one fingering his eyes, fixing his hair, and sleeve length, but, equally impor­ and adjusting his step, he says, 'This y reaction to "Plastic Frames;' tant, the concern that one dress in a one is mine!'" (Bereishis Rabba 22,6). (Feb. '97) was, predictably, refined and "quiet" manner, one which [The Rosh Yeshiva continued:] M one of pain and sadness. Pain does not cause heads to turn in one's "There is no question that a hen for the student who has to endure the direction. For those to whom "being in Torah must have a neat and clean ridicule of his misguided classmates, and fashion" holds importance, this is a def­ appearance - but Heaven forfend that sadness that such episodes can actual­ inite problem. In the words of the Man­ he seek to be 'in style,' clothing him­ ly occur in a yeshiva. Not that I was sur­ chester Rosh Yeshiva, Rabbi Yehuda Zev self in the latest fashion designed by prised. The unfortunate truth is that to Segal ?"Yr: the gentile world. Nor should a ben some in our community, clothing, "Let us think for a moment: Who Torah be so concerned with his glasses and the like are far more than a are the designers of these fashions and appearance that he preens himself necessity of life. what guidelines do they use in origi­ before a mirror, carefully combing In the world at large, the pursuit of nating their designs? The designers are every hair on his head. It is in regard fashion is both a means of achieving sta­ secularists and more often than not are to those who engage in such practices tus in one's social circle and of drawing immoral. Their goal is to design a style that Satan says, "They are mine!" attention to one's presence. Both ideas that will attract the attention of men. (Inspiration and Insigh~ vol. I pi 214). are contrary to Torah. The Torah extols In other words, these styles are a direct It would be sad enough if the prob- the attribute of hatzne'a Zeches, serving contradiction to the attribute of lem of the students who ridiculed their Hashem without fanfare; to draw atten­ teznius that is the hallmark of Jewish fellow classmate over his out of-vogue tion to oneself through manner of daughters" (Inspiration and Insight, clothing and glasses was limited to that dress is to tread the path of self-glori­ vol. Ip. 298). of poor middos. Given the above, how­ fication and to shun humility, a most With regard to bachurim who show ever, the problem encompasses much precious and elusive trait. excessive concern over their appearance, more; though they may spend much of From a Torah viewpoint, the prob­ Rabbi Segal began by citing a Midrash: their day in front of a Gemora, their lem is far deeper. For a woman, the over­ R' Ami said: "The yeitzer hara does behavior is, in fact, reflective of an out­ riding factor in dress should, of course, not walk on the 'side streets' [among look which is not at all rooted in Torah. be tzenius. The concept of tzenius the humble and modest who are not Rabbi Shimon Finkelman, a rebbein Yeshiva Darchei overly concerned with their outward ROOT OF THE PROBLEM Torah, Far Rockaway, NY, is a frequent contributor appearance - Maharzu]; rather, he to these pages, including "It's Time to Face the Music;' walks down the 'main thoroughfares' he author of "Plastic Frames" in Feb. '95. He ls the author of several biographies published by ArtScroll Mesorah Publications, as well [after those who are concerned with concludes by saying that rather as the recent Chofetz Chaim, A Lesson a Day, in col­ their appearance]. When he sees some- Tthan attempt to effect a change in laboration with Rabbi Yitzchok Berkowitz. If you are thinking of moving for Jewish Growth Opportunities ...

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46 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 his son's yeshiva, he is, instead, search­ occasion for a boy than when he "Zahar Chaddash states that R'Shi­ ing for one whose students come from becomes bar mitzva. mon bar Yochai held a seuda on the day "less affluent" families. Certainly, the Several months ago, a former talmid when his son, R' Elazar, became bar problems which his son encountered are of mine, now in eighth grade, met me mitzva. When asked to explain the rea­ more likely to be found among "rich in the corridor of our yeshiva and excit­ son for his great joy, R' Shimon replied kids." As stated in the opening chapter edly informed me that he would be that on that very day, his son received of Mesi/as Yesharim: becoming bar mitzva that night. I told a neshama kedosha, sacred soul. R' Shi­ "Thus, man is actually placed in the him, "You should know that tonight you mon sat his son beside himself, with midst of a raging battle, because all sit­ will not be the same person that you are Sages to his right and left, and said, "Sit uations he will encounter in this now. Now, if you will join nine men, a my son, sit. Today you are holy and your world, whether good or bad, are actu­ minyan will not be formed; tonight, lot is with that of holy people/' ally tests for a person. A person may be you can be the tenth member of a How unfortunate that for many, the tried by poverty on the one hand, or minyan, and in so doing bring the spirituality of the moment is over­ by wealth on the other, as Shlomo said, Shechina into our midst1• shadowed or at least tempered by the 'Lest I become affluent and deny G-d or I become impoverished and steal,' (Mishlei 30,9).A person is thus caught in a battle from the fore and from the GBIJS'UI rear. If he is victorious on all fronts, he 'Iti§titute of will then be the adam hashaleim, the ~.:s:!diea BINAH SElVllNARY 'complete man; who will succeed in Sfur~ uniting himself with G-d ... :' With the enthusiastic support and encouragement of Torah leadership, BINAH INSTITUTE OF BAL Tl MORE is pleased to announce the opening of a girls' Surely the percentage of yeshiva stu­ seminary .,,,,. in September/E/ul, 1997/5757. dents to whom fashion is important is higher among the affluent. Whether or Since its establishment in 1992, Binah Institute has rapidly become the foremost center of advanced Limudei Kodesh studies in the Baltimore­ not one should purchase the latest suit Washington area. An affiliate of Seminar Yerushalayim, Binah has from Pierre Cardin or the newest Dior consistently provided a high-caliber post-seminary program where students silk tie is more of a test for someone with take courses for credit or ilCcM Binah is now expanding to include a fuU money, who can easily afford to satisfy seminary program geared to outstanding high school graduates from the his tastes and who is more likely to feel Baltimore-Washington area and throughout the U.S., who are committed to a need to compete with wealthy neigh­ Torah living and have demonstrated academic excellence. bors who dress this way. PRQGRAM INC! !JDES' It is untrue, however, to say that this • A first year seminary program taught by our faculty of distinguished problem exists only among the affluent. Talmidei Chachamtm, mentors, and specialists in their respective fields of study. There are many yeshiva students from • A guided tour of Israel, providing an inspiring learning experience. affluent homes who dress rather simply, • A second year program of Limudei Kodesh and secular studies courses. and there are many from non-affluent homes to whom manner of dress is a • A high faculty-student ratio emphasizing individualized attention, major issue. The most crucial factor is maximizing academic achievement, and promoting personal growth and not the size of the parents' bank character development. account, but the way in which they raise • Donnitory arrangements for out-of-town students, enriched by social their children. And certainly, the exam­ exposure and involvement in the thriving Baltimore Torah community. ple that parents set, in manner of dress, ENDORSED AND SUPPORTED BY: as well as in other areas, will have a pro­ found influence on their children. Rosh Hayeshiva Horav Yaakov Weinberg, Shlita Yeshivas Ner Israel Rav Mendel Feldman, Shlita Kha! Ahavas Yisroel Tzemacb Tzedek Rav Moshe Heinemann, Shlita Agudath Israel of Baltimore PRINCE FOR A DAY Rav Yaakov Hopfer, Shlita Shearith Israel Rav Ervin Preis, Shlita Suburban Orthodox Toras Chaim hinuch habanim, child rearing Rav Tzvi Hersh Weinreb, Shlita Shomrei Emunah and education, is an ongoing Cprocess, every day at every hour. For infonnation and registration, please call There are certain occasions, however, Rebbetzin Chana Slanger, Ph.D., Director that are milestones in a child's life and 410-484-9153 when proper chinuch is especially cru­ cial. Surely there is no more important

------·------~------"------·---·- The Jewish Observer, April 1997 47 hoopla of the event, beginning with the "big bash" to send his son the wrong more than his chance to be in the spot­ donning of tefillin for the first time a message. Once, I attended a rather light, then a golden opportunity may, month or so before the bar mitzva. plain bar mitzva at which a slide show chas v'shalom, become a negative Aside from the magnitude of the mitz­ was presented, showing the "star of the experience. va itself, donning tefillin for the first show" at his best from birth to bar time should signal the beginning of mitzva, certainly not a lesson in humil­ SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL intense spiritual preparation for the bar ity. A bar mitzva is a time to show a boy mitzva, akin to the message sounded by not who he is, but who he can become. ome years ago, a ta/mid of mine the first blowing of the shofar on Rosh It has become "fashionable" in some from an affluent home became bar Chodesh Elul. For some, this milestone, circles to hand out party masks at bar Smitzva. The seuda was held in a like the bar mitzva, is marred by that mitzva affairs, turning the dance floor shut-basement catering hall; plastic most familiar simcha creature - the into a masquerade - accompanied of and paper goods were used. It was the camera. As one more Yiddishe neshama course, by "Jewish" disco music and plainest of affairs. Toward the end of the is binding his mind and heart to the fancy footwork. What will the bar mitz­ meal, the father spoke. The gist of his sacred words hidden inside his tefillin, va boy take home from such an message was: "I could well afford a more lights flash. Couldn't the picture-taking evening, aside from gifts? The signifi­ elaborate affair, but I felt it unnecessary. wait until after Shacharis? Would it not cance of his entrance into halachic Instead, I calculated the difference and be an important lesson for life to say to manhood will probably be lost in a sea have written out a check in that amount one's child, "The tefillin are so heilig of glitter. which I would like to present now to the (sacred) and wearing them is so special, It is up to parents to determine menahel of my son's yeshiva." that we don't want anything to interfere whether their son will see his becom­ Later, when I expressed my admi­ with your concentration when you ing bar mitzva for what it really is - ration to the father, he responded, "I put them on for the first time. The pic­ a major spiritual milestone and trans­ was very uncomfortable making that tures can wait for later." formation. If this message is not speech. It seemed as if I was patting Then, of course, there is the bar imparted, and in its place, the boy per­ myself on the back. But I felt that it had mitzva seuda. One need not throw a ceives his turning thirteen as little to be said." On another occasion, I attended a bar mitzva seuda of a boy who also was from a well-to-do home. Had the ~------~ father been a melamed or a kollel fellow, ARE You MOVING? the affair could not have been more simple. (I might add that this boy is not IS YOUR NAME AND ADDRESS PRINTED a flashy dresser.) There were about sixty INCORRECTLY ON THE JO MAILING LABEL? guests, aside from the bar mitzva's class­ mates. The highlight of the affair was We need your help to ensure proper delivery of the Jewish Observer to your home. Please attach current mailing label in the space below, or print clearly your address and the boy's completion of all six orders of computer processing numbers that are printed above your name on the address label. the Mishna. The father wept with tears of joy. It was a beautiful evening. Most important is the lasting impression that such an evening surely had on the boy. Affix old label here On the other hand, when parents place undue emphasis on the style of the bar mitzva boy's hat and the rest of his outfit, on the way his hair is cut, on Name------~--~- party decor and other foolishness, then New Address------the child has learned: what is important is not who I am on the inside, but who City, I I I appear to be on the outside. It is such State, a child who will quite possibly become I clothes conscious and might even taunt Date Effective I a classmate who dares to be seen wear­ Send address changes to: The Jewish Observer Change of Address I ing plastic frames. • 84 William Street, New York, NY 10038 Please allow 4-6 weeks for all changes to be reflected on your mailing label. We wil! not be I 1 See Berachos 6a. I responsible for back issues missed unless you notify us 6 weeks prior to your move, .J 'Cited in Sefer Matan L'Bar Mitzva.

------The Jewish Observer, April 1997 48 Celebrate PASSOVER with the best life has to offer

tPREMtuM.

7'1ii & creaJll ' 'tnte READERS' FORUM Orthodoxy's Move to the Right

PROFESSOR HELMREICH: There is no question that Modern knows that. Nevertheless, there are two IN DEFENSE OF THE INTEGRITY OF Orthodoxy has its failings as does the issues that concern me. MODERN ORTHODOXY traditional yeshiva world. I will not enu­ First is the fact that Modern Ortho­ merate them here because those of us doxy has a clear philosophy which can To the Editor: in the know are fully aware of them. I be summed up as follows: It sees posi­ I read with great interest your article have tremendous respect for the dedi­ tive value in secular learning and in "Orthodoxy's Move to the Right" (Feb. cation and achievements of the yeshi­ interacting with the larger society, over '97), in which you critique my article va community and anyone who has read and above engaging in it simply to earn as it appeared in the Long Island Jewish my book on the subject (excerpted in a living. Moreover, it believes that the World. your own pages when it first came out) Torah is consistent with a modern way of life including the findings of science. Its approach to women is also different, In Radin, the old yeshiva still stands. arguing as it does that they can partic­ The Chafetz Chaim no longer learns there. ipate fully in many areas of religious life that have, until now, been closed to Indeed, the sweet sound of Torah learning has them. Finally, it believes in the concept not been heard in the great beis midrash for over of"medinat Yisroel." 5 decades. The room has been redesigned to I am critical of those Modern Ortho­ accommodate local folk dancing, plays and an dox who see the movement as only a way station on the road to "true frumkeit," occasional disco night. and those who are not familiar with its ideology. As to waxing nostalgic about the 1960s when Modern Orthodoxy had Gesher Journey is a two our mesorah and witness the more adherents, we all have our week educational tour of the renaissance of communities nearly "favorites." The Modern Orthodox long Jewish communities (""" lHrf extinguished under for the 1960s and the yeshiva world of the former Soviet ,y ~ JJ l p communist oppression. yearns for the 1860s and Volozhin. Union. This is a rare V '<.:-,.d We will explore Kiev, Second) no one can deny that mil­ opportunitytogaina 0 ~ BabiYar,Berdichev, lions of American Jews are neither Mod­ first-hand glimpse of , ((- Mir, Radin, Minsk, Vilna, ern or "Right-Wing Orthodox." They the towns that once Volozhin, Moscow and housed the titans of Jf Ol 1LJ[ JR_ N JE Y other important sites. are, quite simply, not frum and at least half of them are marrying gentiles. Notwithstanding the positive accom­ plishments of the yeshiva world in On July 21st, the Kol Torah will once again reaching out to such Jews, 90% of them resonate in the town of Radin. All are invited to are not interested in the frum commu­ nity's way of life. The yeshivas are in the attend this shiur free of charge. forefront of the outreach movement but, when all is said and done, the Orthodox (Well, sort of.) in America are only 5% of the total pop­ ulation. Is that success? Modern Orthodoxy has a different Cost: $3,675 includes r/t airfare from New York, glatt kosher meals, approach, one grounded in a definite hotel accommodations and ground travel (l" class trains & buses). philosophy as expressed by Yeshiva Dates: July 14 - July 27 University's Torah U'Maddahjournal. In Call: (718) 432-GESHER (432-4374) Space is limited, so call now! fact, there are many synagogues in communities like Scarsdale, Englewood, Plainview, Great Neck, and Silver Spring Director: Rabbi Yaakov Kermaier is a musmach of RIETS, learned in Rav Z. Kushelevsky's yeshiva in Yerushalayim, holds a Masters degree in Jewish history, and has traveled extensively throughout the former which have more than a sprinkling of Soviet Union. He is presently the Associate Rabbi of the Riverdale Jewish Center in New York. baalei teshuva davening in them. Coordinator: Vitali Pruss directs the Aish Hatorah College of Jewish Studies in his home town. Minsk, Belarus The point is that even the most

50 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 ardent supporter of Agudah cannot real­ years before his passing.) Even if these insights for a Torah Jew. One would have istically say that a Modern Orthodox Jew paractices were accepted or glossed over to be in possession of unusual strength is really worse than a Jew who eats treif, for decades, they still do not necessari­ of commitment- or, by contrast, to be is mechallel Shabbos, and marries out of ly represent an ideal worth preserving. totally indifferent to the stability of one's the religion. Instead of criticizing each As for the four salient distinguishing religious strength - to promote, as a other's approach to Orthodoxy as lack­ features of Modern Orthodoxy singled positive activity, interaction with larg­ ing or inauthentic, shouldn't we, in light out by Professor Helmreich in his let­ er society in its current narcissistic, of the magnitude of the problem, ter, a great many prominent Modern hedonistic course. Of course, science can accept the fact that different people are Orthodox thinkers and poskim have inform and even inspire, but does attracted to different approaches? great difficulty with each of these areas, study of science per se' give direction to WILLIAM B. HELMREICH for distinct reasons relevant to each: a Jew anchored in Torah? PROFESSOR e The thrust of contemporary secular e Active exploration for new ways for DEPARTMENT OF SOCIOLOGY learning is such that it would seem to women to "participate fully in many CUNY GRADUATE CENTER be a very tenuous source of values and areas of religious life that have, until New York, NY 1 The Author Responds Thousands of scholars "Ul Perhaps we should begin with Pro­ fessor Helmreich's rhetorical question: (Maimonides School in Boston several L--..;------.J

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 51 now, been closed to them," is hardly a doxy's credo* in 1986 and again in 1988, find myself - or any other Agudah sup­ distinguishing mark of Modern Ortho­ listed three central points, completely porter, for that matter- suggesting that doxy's agenda. Most Modern Orthodox omitting the women's issue. "More "a Modern Orthodox Jew is really rabbis, such as those who make up the participation" on the part of women is worse than a Jew who eats treif, is vast majority of the Queens Vaad not a matter of holding fast to the "cen­ mechallel Shabbos, and marries out of Harabbonim, quite clearly and unequiv­ ter," but one of moving decisively to the religion:'We'll continue to welcome ocally reject such experimentation. Conservatism. Modern Orthodox outreach to the Would Professor Helmreich fault them e The fourth area - "belief in the con­ non-affiliated in hope that they come to for being unfaithful to their Modern cept of Medinat Yisraef' - is sadly identify with them, as we have expressed Orthodox roots? In fact, very few Mod­ anachronistic in this post-Zionistic era admiration for NCSY's accomplish­ ern Orthodox leaders entertained of the shrinking state. Classic Ahavas ments in the past. expanded roles for women until recent­ Haaretz includes a lot more of Hebron Back to Professor Helmreich's invi­ ly. Moreover, Dr. Norman Lamm, in a than commitment to the Medina does. tation to "accept the fact that different definitive discussion of Modern Ortho- Finally, as an ardent Agudist, I do not people are attracted to different approaches": How about "accepting the fact"that erstwhile Modern Ortho­ dox Jews "are attracted" to what they perceive as the more robust, passionate 3 Major SteP.s Orthodoxy of the yeshiva and chassidic worlds? Or is that choice unacceptable? to Good Health NW * For exact quotation, see The New York Times, March 23, '88, and Moment at Brookdale: Magazine, June <86.

Rabbi Zochariah Ge//ey(/rfll. "THE HELMREICH PRINCIPLE": spiritual leader of K'hal Ada.1 AGREEMENT AND DISSENT }eshunm at ribbon cutting ceremon)' of the new sra1e.of. To the Editor: rhe-a!f glatt kosher kitchen at I write in response to your thought­ Thr Brookdale ful article on "Orthodoxy's Move to the University HospitJ/ and Medical Right" (Feb. '97), which represents a cri­ Center. tique of"Professor William B. Helmre­ ich's keynote address at the recent national convention of the Union of Orthodox Jewish Congregations of WM> ooc oew ;t'1o-ot' ~o.:.:JtrrC America." the-ar1 g/a/t kosher r;J r..::::::> . ookda_le is in rhe kitchen and special v omm1bnm! -- ' - - dsl of a major $200 I do not write to quibble with Rabbi

5ensrtrvity to the needs .. · ....· . 0 1 kd 1 ,5 .·.•.. '.·,·.'j•.·.~''-~.'.)'.. million modernization Wolpin's reasoned response to Profes­ of Orthodox Jews, we ,, -~~- Five Broo a f' (- '-\.;:;,/ program which are conrin~ing our long ·ftt~:.:~.tf ·-;'.\~~ doctors were n_am,ed ~- - will continue its sor Helmreich but rather to correct the trad111on ol service to ~<:\>J\-" - among the na_twn s ~ commitment to misconception that his controversial the Jewish community besf by Amencan excellence. remarks were somehow a "keynote of Brooklyn and Health Magazine. Ten elsewhere. were /isled with /he address." Not only was I present for the /Je5t doctors by New speech in question but I chaired the ses­ York Magazine. sion at which it was delivered. Profes­ sor He1mrcich was not, and never See How Close Excellent Medical Care Really Is! claimed to be, a "keynote" speaker but rather shared a panel with two distin­ FOR MORE INFORMATION, PLEASE CONTACTc guished synagogue Rabbis - one the fli,~ THE BROOKDALE UNIVERSITY flfJi,_~ son-in-law of a venerable Rosh Yeshiva who has been a fixture at Agudath Israel 'l,,,~, HOSPITAL AND MEDICAL CENTER 'f:'i,~;, - ~ Conventions for decades and the other ONE BROOKDALE PLAZA. BROOKLYN. N.Y. 11212 •CALL ERIC MATZA AT 718/240-S2S1 the mora d'asra of one of America's best • OR COME IN AND SEE FOR YOURSELF! known Orthodox synagogues. Both speakers raised many points in your arti-

52 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 de and both represented a cogent case have responded [to our opinions as al Unity Governement ("Orthodoxy's that the issues that bind all Torah-ori­ expressed in the JO readers' poll]. I Move to the Right;' Feb. '97). Indeed, at ented Jews are far, far stronger than those return to your pages with renewed a time when the question of a success­ that may still divide us. Maybe, just enthusiasm. ful achievement of a democratic peace maybe, the purported division of Amer­ YOEL ABRAMOVITZ between Israelis and Palestinians ican Orthodoxyalong"modern/frumie" Mountaindale, NY remains in doubt and scandal after scan­ cleavage lines is an anachronistic straw­ dal plagues the Knesset, the two parties man from a stale debate that only serves TAKES ISSUE WITH OPPOSITION TO might do well to see through their dif­ to delight the all-too-numerous enemies NATIONAL UNITY GOVERNEMENT ferences and amalgamate into one Israel of Torah while confusing those of us National Party. Both the present Labor who are too busy trying to help in our To the Editor: and Likud leadership seem committed, own way to have time to pick sides. As a religious Zionist, committed to in one form or the other, to some form DAVID LUCHINS the peace process, I would take strong of responsible government for the The Bronx, NY issue with your opposition to a Nation- Palestinians, and a merger of the two

The author responds:

It is very gratifying that fellow pan­ elists at the UOJCA Convention session at which Professor Helmreich spoke concurred with our critique of his address. Since we were not present at the convention, however, our comments were inspired by the articles based on Professor Helmreich's address as pub­ lished in the Long Island Jewish World and The New York Sentinel. They pre­ On Yorn Tov ... when are you per­ sented the Helmreich speech only, mitted to adjust the heat on a stove? If which they described as "an edited ver­ you need to carry a key, can you carry the entire key ring? Can you sleep on sion of a lecture delivered by the author the first day of Pesach to stay awake for at the keynote session of the Orthodox the second seder? Union's annual convention:' Thus, we, These, and many other practical too, described the lecture as a ((keynote modern-day concerns are discussed in address." YOM TOY IN HALACHAH: a clearly Dr. Luchin1s reference to "a stale written, comprehensive text dealing with all aspects of Yorn Tov obse1Vance. debate" is puzzling, to say the least, in view of the sharp and lively differences Jn YOM TOV IN HALACHAH you'll find entire chapters dealing with: The that serve to divide those Orthodox Jews Principles of Yorn Tov Melachah • who are loyal to Taras Moshe and Min­ Sorting • Grinding • Kneading • hag Yisroel from those who are calling Cooking • Heating Elements • for radical changes in such volatile areas Kindling • Extinguishing • Bathing • Washing dishes • Carrying • Preparing for as Orthodox feminism. NW another day • Eruv Tavshilin • Muktza • Kovod, Oneg, and Simcha • The Second Day of Yorn Tov and more . JO LISTENS TO ITS READERS .Also featured: Extensive hebrew footnotes on each page which include in-depth discussions of many concepts, along with a thorough index of source material for To the Editor: quick and easy reference. I was most gratified by the tone of Enhance your Yorn Tov with this remarkable new volume from Feldheim. your article, "Orthodoxy's Move to the To preview this and other selected Feldheim books h.c. $12.95 Right," (Feb. '97). I think it took a high visit www.thejewishworld.com \books road of confidence and inclusion, which Available at al! Jewish bookstores or direct from I'm convinced has the greatest potential to reach the broadest constituency. It is FELDHEIM Jn PUBLISHERS truly gratifying, and speaks volumes that we, your readers, have been heard, Torah Literature of Quality 200 Airport txeculive Park, Nanuel, NY 10954 • Tel (914) 356-2262 • Fax (914) 425-1908 • E-mail teldheim@V1Gt\dp\a1a.cl>m thoughtfully considered, and that you Toll Free: 800-237-7149 •Ask for our catalog.

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 53 parties would represent a tremendous this irresponsibility in the name of our effort to put interests of our common Holy Torah. I have no doubt that some CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST Israeli fatherland above partisan politics. day they will have much to account for One of the essential principles of any before the Almighty. DR. BENZION democratic society is that of majority DAVID L. BLATT SOROTZKIN rule. While the rights of the Chareidi Chicago, IL NY, State Licensed communities must always be protected the behavior of some of the "religious" Response: Adults and Adolescents parties in the Knesset has, over the years, has bordered on nothing short of dis­ The letter writer defends the proposal (718) 377-6408 loyalty to the Jewish state. Many of these of a National Unity Government (91 7) 219-3867 parties have placed their own narrow self (N.U.G.) as "represent [ing] a tremen­ interests above the national good and dous effort to put the interests of our they have done so confidently cloaking common Israeli fatherland above par­ tisan politics." We question this for the following Experienced Magnificent reasons, which are articulated by Yisroel and highly six acre Spiegel in the article of his reference: qualified campus I) If Likud is prepared to make con­ Rebbeyim cessions for the sake of peace - which, Activities Top Which since the Hebron evacuation, should notch encourage quite obviously be the case - what general la!!!itlng remains to be gained by a N.U.G.? Labor studies friendships will certainly concur with any conces­ teachers and positive sions Likud makes. self Image 2) Spiegel posits that the purpose of Class sizes the merge would be to compensate for that nurture Clear and educational consistent the ideological vacuum at the core of the growt:h discipline and constituency of both parties. Neither has expectations anything to gain by being the dominant A goal for :ni::iill :ni-rr.i ruling force in Israel. faeussed on In view of the above, forming a Excellent :t*li:r'f rT:::l:"fK, N.U.G. would have no bearing on the '::>N"l'li• :M::l:'IN, educational :ni•"l::l:i. l'!::i:iici !iupervi!iion author's agenda of "realizing the inter­ ests of our common Israeli fatherland." Personal attention Graduates Then there is a third point: and direction who enter 3) A N.U.G. would not depend on the the finest participation of the religious parties to A well planned, Yeshivas and function. Kashrus; respect for Shabbos; directed and permitting yeshiva and kollel members balanced Universities program to pursue their Torah studies without of Torah learning A partnership interruption for military service; defin­ and general studies between school, ing marriage, divorce and conversions to achieve parent and student by halachic criteria; financial support for \""IN 1"\"T Cl~ :'l"li:n to reach the destination Torah schools - all of these would like­ ly be jettisoned in an N.U.G. that does Night Seder learning together with older bochurim not include religious participation. Does opposing such a prospect really Incentive grants for represent "narrow self-interests" which graduates to study should be sacrificed for the sake of"the In Israel national good"? Don't these represent the very essence of"the national good"? FOR INFORMATION C'ONTAC"f: ,l\fpsi"'1a, Rabbi ,\t. Englandt"r, 1Ur11ahd, NW 197'i l,yndwaJ', t,.,,ndhunt, Ohio 44121 •Phone (216) 18.! 649'i

54 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 Binyomin Eckstein

FACING ADVER­ he second theme that is inter­ SITY WITH FAITH, twined in the chapters of this by M.L. Cramer Tbook is Miriam Leah's ceaseless (Targum/Feldheim efforts in finding a cure for her disease. Publishers, Jerusalem/ Miriam Leah, the mes­ The book relates her visits to a multi­ Nanuet, NY 1997, sage was clear - tude of diverse medical practitioners and $16.95) "Have bitachon." The therapists, often enduring severe pain, numerous visits and heartache and frustration in the process. interesting discus­ Miriam Leah refuses to resign herself to acing Adversity With sions with some of the situation and remain complacent. Faith is a diary of a today's leading Torah thinkers, She interprets the dictum: "Even if a F young woman suffer- related in this book, seem always to have sword were ta hang over a person's neck, ing from a debilitating disease, multiple pointed her in the direction of bitachon one should never give up hope" to mean sclerosis. The young woman, Mrs. Miri­ and acceptance of Hashem's will. that she must seek out continuously the am Leah Cramer (pseudonym), shares with us her private thoughts, emotions, conflicts and tensions as she experiences them during the various stages of this Even grown-ups dreaded disease. The trials and tribulations of this unique individual open the window into deseroe an the complex workings of her inner self. The reader will easily be able to apply these insights to the tests he/she may ifikomen present! encounter, however different and minor WHY NOT GIVE OR GET AN AFIKOMEN PRESENT they may be. The countless, moving THAT WILL LAST AN ENTIRE YEAR? anecdotes and the numerous letters she received, as told in this book, will touch the heart and nurture the spirit. Subscribe, or give a gift at these reduced prices It is a mere fact of life that at some and The Jewish Observer- filled with the views point in our lives, we will be faced with of leading Torah thinkers on current issues- will he difficult times, whether it be singlehood delivered each rnonth, directly to your door. or bringing up children, illness, disease 'fhe longer you subscribe for, the larger your savings. or old age. This book is a guide on how to face these tests according to Torah Of course, this offer is unconditional1y guaranteed; hashkafa. you n1ay cancel at any time and receive a refund for Of the numerous themes in this book all undelivered copies. there are three that clearly stand out to So order today, and the very next issue will be on this reviewer. The first and most poignant theme is Miriam Leah's firm its way to you as soon as possible. soul-searching method of acquiring a .J.O. SUIJSCRIPTl()N SAVINGS CER'l'IFICA'l'E steadfast bitachon. In the opening of her book she tells us about her husband's 0 YES, I want to take advantage of this 1noney saving offer! Enter 1ny order as follows: U NE\\-' SUBSCRIPTIOJ\ i..J RENE\VAL 0 GII·T Name visit to the Skulener Rebbe. The Rebbe IM O~H listened attentively, and then began to Address 0 3 years Cover Price $10.5 Your cost $60 $96 sing a number of times: City ______... ll:l1'':>!ll111n1'J 1l'l11JN 1n1'J 1J" 0 2 year~ Cover Priel"' !70 Your cost $44 $68 (,, """"") "1'01J N':>l 1n1'J 1J Cl I y<'ar Cover Prit:(~ 5;3.) Your cost $24 $.16 Slate -----Zip ----- The Rebbe then said that his father W Send gi(t card from:---·-----~ had told him that whenever a pasuk ~~Ilu 0 Enclosed:$ or comes to his mind, this has a direct con­ UBSERVER Charge my: i.J MaslnCanl 0 VISA Suitt· 1200. 84- William Sncet, NPw York, NY 10038 nection to the current discussion. To Thr Jrwi. !l'r- in~ ""!'· Fon•ign payin<•n1 mu;i h,. ma

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 55 most recent developments in the med­ able to find just the right Torah thought Orthodox Jewish ical journals that relate to her disease. to say to her at what seems to be the Social Service Agency The story is a lesson of hope, courage most appropriate moment. In return, and determination. Miriam Leah displays a deep respect for is searching for Shidduchim on The third theme gives us a valuable her husband, always mindful of his feel­ behalf of highly capable, frum young insight into the support process, which ings. Reading this book is a lesson in the men in their 30's. These young men can alleviate much of the pain while workings of a true Torah marriage. have mild learning disabilities, are being tested with such difficult situa­ Insights into such topics as : Why stable and in long-term employment. tions. I am referring here to the devo­ good people suffer? What is the definition If you know of suitable young tion of her husband, Leib. Leib is Miri­ of bitachon? What thoughts should one women, please call (212) 252-3782. am Leah's support and confidant. He have when experiencing pain? How does Information will be kept in undertakes long journeys on her behalf, one comfort an individual suffering pain? strict confidence. to seek advice and pray at holy places. - and many more, can be found with­ Most of all, being a Torah scholar, he is in the anecdotes and discussions throughout this book. The reader may be tempted to quickly turn the pages, looking for new fascinating stories that Helping each and every talmid each chapter brings. To derive the max­ succeed in his learning and imum benefit from this book, though, it is recommended that the reader pon­ reach his potential. der on each new insight as it appears and carefully internalize its message. Professional, warm, dedicated Rebbeim and staff. he sun, on a very cold day, gives light but it is hard to feel its Chavrusa program with Twarmth. If one travels just a lit­ tle closer to the sun, one will most def­ talmidim from Beth Medrash initely feel the intensity of its warmth. Govoha, Lakewood. Miriam Leah's book is a journey through the cold days of suffering, seek­ Vocational training offered in ing a closeness and an emotional conjunction with secular stud­ warmth in her relationship to Hashem. The author demonstrates in this book ies department. how, by striving to be close to her Cre­ ator and by furthering her involvement Personalized attention to with others in need, one can, in effect, each talmid. turn tragedy into opportunity. This book, which was only recently Supervised Dorming facilities published, is already sold out in the bookstores of Europe - an indication 20 minutes from Lakewood; of its timeliness and popularity. One 1 hour from Brooklyn. might add that a comprehensive index of pesukim and ma'amarei Chazal quoted in this book should be includ­ ed in the next edition. In today's age, the quality of life is debated heavily in the secular journals, often relaying to us despair and apikor­ sus. Facing Adversity With Faith opens us up to the unadulterated, time- test­ ed Torah approach. It is both refreshing

Please contact J.1.abh1 Yo.set Po.:;en al 908-776-6504 and informative. A much needed and or 905-0726. Fax: 908-905-1039 Mailing Address: highly recommended book. • 1446 Moninouth Ave, Lakewood. NJ 08701

56 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 spot where the tenth man stood. selves. Not all things heard on the radio When I came back to America, my are a waste of time. rebbi debriefed me about my trip. He Taking any good idea to an extreme was not at all amazed when I related this can cause many missed opportunitifs to story. "Do you know why people cry at do chessed and bring about kiddush Kever Rochel?" he asked. "Because every Hashem. One should learn how to use Jewish neshama hears what the ears media in a reasonable way so that he don't pick up-Rochel Imeinu's sobbing may stay aware of common problems ("Rochel mevaka al baneha"); and that and aid in solving some of the real crises engenders the tearful response of those of our era. who are there:' WOLF KARFIOL MORE TEARS AT KEVER ROCHEL Many tears and smiles have come and Brooklyn, NY gone in the past thirteen years, but the To the Editor: memory of those special tears at Kever Unde Moishy, "Rochel's Tears" (JO, Feb:97) struck Rochel always remain with me, as we Mordechai llen Da\Tid, a responsive chord, as it brought to mind pray to Hashem for the unification of my first experience with Kever Rochel. Kial Yisroel in our boundaries. !!ltd othettop·of·th~~lhte Thirteen years ago, I visited Eretz Yis­ N. ). KRAMER Jewisb entertainers roel for the first time. The trip to Kever Jerusalem · ate aviilable · · Rochel was in the mid-afternoon, and to \Tisit my wife suggested that I daven Mincha DISENGAGING FROM RADIO: IS COLD there because the short winter day TURKEY THE BEST MENU! seri()t1~ly ill might end before we got back to our children quarters in Hebron. We were lacking To the Editor: lhanl)»1ttilnn... a paper yarmulke, accompanied by her also appeared in the local Eugene, Ore­ ~£he!sSiddur and Eastern Europe. BRETZ YISKOEL approached the spot where we were I would suggest to Mr. Akiva David­ Call Rabbi Gavriel Beer for assembled. Sometimes you read stories sen, author of "From Station to Station" information on obtaining about the "floor being wet with tears" (Feb. '97), that he missed this opportu­ cemetery plots in Beth Shemesh during auspicious moments in holy sur­ nity to participate in a very important and other locations in Israel. roundings. I never thought I would wit­ mitzva that will enhance our people, ness this, but here I did - right at the families, communities, as well as our- 011-972-2-641-1923

The Jewish Observer, April 1997 57 TAKES EXCEPTION TO and with a great sense of satisfaction Dynamic "NOT TO THE FLEET" that someone finally cared to address this serious problem. However, upon Principal To the Editor: reaching the main body of the essay, sought for fledgling Torah Day School in It was with mounting concern that I found myself deeply disturbed by I read the article entitled, "Not to the Ottawa, Ontario. Half-time administra­ what I was reading. Although I am Fleet is the Race" in the Adar I edition quite certain that the author is hon­ tion, half-lime teaching Limudai Kodesh. of your publication. At first glance, it estly attempting to portray the situa­ Salary commensurate with experience. seemed that this article addressed an tion as he sees it, to bring this prob­ Please reply to: important issue - that davening lem to our collective attention, .Mrs. R. Stulberg, 1675 Rhodes Court, should not be viewed as a duty to be "lezakos es harabbim;' I respectfully Ottawa. Ontario, Canada, K1 H 5S8 dispensed with quickly and with as lit­ maintain that his is a distorted and or fax to (613) 521-5043 tle fuss as possible. Admirably, Avie misleading point of view. Saffire challenges this attitude, and I One of the main aspects of this arti­ found myself in complete concurrence cle deals with the alleged tendency of bachurim to rush their davening while tleDUSAl::.e'M at home to "vent... their yeshiva-induced t:orohFol'rlilies .. . .. davening frustrations on their commu­ nei ., . nity shuI'' as an expression of the resentment harbored against the yeshi­ .16:N va which "coerces" them to daven slow­ ly. This, continues the author, is strong­ ly resented by the regular mispallelim who would otherwise daven slowly and with kavana, "without having to swal­ low any words or lose any syllables:' The author maintains this is a serious prob­ lem in the average shul in the average town which needs to be addressed in a national public forum such as The Jew­ ish Observer. I strongly disagree with this pre­ sentation as an accurate and average scenario. Yes, happily, minyanim such as the one Mr. Saffire attends do exist. However, in the thriving out-of-town community where I come from, and in every other city I have visited, the aver­ ATrENTION age minyan is more reminiscent of the CORPORATIONS, INDUSTRY, F

---···---..-- .. ------58 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 slowly. And this is true even in later A CALL FOR CIVILIZED ENTHUSIASM music, crude music is probably not puri­ minyanim frequented by older indi­ ATSIMCHOS fied by slapping Jewish lyrics on top of viduals who have no job to run to and it. If music touches us more directly than have "all the time in the world." To the Editor: lyrics do, it might be less harmful to accompany ghastly popular lyrics with Yes, there are bachurim who daven Your recent music article (Jan. '97) elegant melodies than the reverse situ­ faster at home than in yeshiva, but the was welcome. We now avoid gentile ation what we see done by rock music overwhelming majority do so only to foods, movies and books while accept­ goes far beyond showing a weakness for keep up with the others in the minyan. ing its crassest, synthesized music. popular culture. It's worth considering For Mr. Saffire to generalize on the basis Almost ten years ago, a prestigious that we may be more safely exposed to of a situation resulting from the unlike­ Orthodox Shabbaton in Palm Springs 18th and 19th century symphonic ly convergence· of a conscientious offered Judaicized rock music as Motza­ music than to "shlock rock." minyan with an atypical bachur is ' ei Shabbos entertainment. The band absurd. By the way, simchos are less pleasant leader sat slumped with a jaded expres­ with music played louder than necessary Further, I was deeply disturbed and sion implying, "I've seen it all and it's to encourage participation. We get sore even offended by this author's "analy­ a bore!" His yarmulke was big, though. throats just by speaking with people next sis" of the behavior he witnessed. Must A 1995 Orthodox telethon in L.A. to us. Torah life should be enthusiastic, we immediately jump to conclusions showed a rocking Chassid shoving a but still civilized. and assume the worst? Why shade the microphone down his throat. Several DAVID ALI'SCHULER actions of a few youthful bachurim with chubby men in yeshiva garb nearby had Los Angeles, CA dark overtones of resentment and coer­ sweat rolling down their peyos, their cion and then cast aspersions over the hands and hips gyrating in all-too-per­ The author is the music columnist for entire community of the pride and joy fect synchronization. The Voice, a Jewish Community weekly of Kial Yisroel, the yeshiva bachurim who newspaper in Los Angeles. Given the spiritual potential of are the Amud HaTorah V'Avoda, and who uphold the world in its entirety with their Torah and tefillos each and Considering a move every day? I understand that Mr. Saffire is upset and frustrated by what he per­ toMOIVSEY? ceives as a damaging inconsistency in the behavior of those who are truly Kial Yis­ for careful attention to your roefs future, and it was only in the hope individual needs, call us today! of improvement that he wrote this arti­ cle. But must we air mere speculations (914) 354·8445 publicly? MORDECHAI STERN

The author responds: You can! Just call

The article was not written to cast The Yitti Leibel aspersions on the general yeshiva pop­ Helpline. ulation. Who could deny that they serve as a model of tefilla as it is meant HOURS; to be experienced? In fact, as the letter­ Monday-Friday ...... 8am -12pm writer says, the average yeshiva bachur Monday-Thursday ...... 8pm -llpm shuns the amud at the home-town shu~ Sunday ...... 9am -12pm, 9pm -llpm he's bound to slow down the works. It's that rare kid who says yes to the gabbats 718-HELP-NOW invitation who is the subject of my (718)435-7669 litany. If my words were misinterpret­ Chicago (800)HELP-023 ed as a critique of the attitude and con­ duct of the general yeshiva population, Lakewood (908)363-1010 I am truly sorry. A.S. For dedications call 718-692-1578

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might reasonably be assumed impossi­ To insist, though, that Israel accept Putting the "U" ble. But while conversion is indeed redefinitions of the word "Jew" - allowed by Jewish law, the very integri­ whether that of the Reform movement Back in UJA ty of Kial Yisroel as a people depends on or those of "Humanistic Judaism" or the maintenance, in its regard, of the "Messianic Judaism" or some yet newer Rabbi Moshe Sherer millennia-old standards of halacha. version of the Jewish faith - thus per­ President Orthodox Jewry simply cannot mitting non-Jews to parade as Jews, is a Agudath Israel ofAmerica accept the efficacy of ceremonies that virtual recipe for Jewish societal suicide. compromise the codified halachic That the Jewish movements hoping JA-Federation of New York is requirements of conversion, which to gain members, money and stature pledged, as its president and include the aspiring convert's genuine from Israeli governmental legitimation U executive vice-president remind and unequivocal commitment to the of multiple "Judaisms" choose to disre­ us, to "promote Jewish unity and values:' divine and binding nature of halacha gard that dire prognosis is hardly sur­ For that very reason, the organization's and mitzvos. prising. But for a community organi­ decision to inject itself into the current As a result, when non-Orthodox rab­ zation like UJA-Federation to inject itself debate over non-halachic conversions in bis welcome as converts men and into a religious-issue controversy- and Israel is profoundly wrong. women who, while they may be won­ to do so in a way that, despite all the Legislation to codify the half-centu­ derful people, remain non-Jews in the fancy phrases and spin-doctoring, will ry old "status quo" placing conversions eyes of classical Jewish religious law, a in the end only intensify Jewish disuni­ under the authority of classical Jewish tremendous blow is dealt to the princi­ ty - is nothing less than astounding. religious law, or Halacha, is before ple of Jewish unity. And deeply, deeply disappointing. Israel's Knesset. The legislation has come under attack by Reform and n this country, the bitter fruits of Because the bottom line, regardless Conservative rabbis - and now, in precisely such practices run rampant of how the organization is attempting effect, by UJA-Federation, which has I are already yielding a horrendously to color its actions, is that UJA-Feder­ conveyed to the Israeli government its split Jewish community, one whose ation has now become embroiled in a concern about the law's potential impact halacha-allegiant members find them­ major halachic issue, and in the process on "Jewish unity." selves forced by their deeply-held reli­ alienated the Orthodox Jewish com­ It is, of course, a most serious under­ gious principles to view matrimony with munity. The organization's many taking for a non-Jew to become part of affiliates of neighboring Jewish congre­ proclamations of dedication to Jewish the Jewish people. Indeed, were it not gations as nothing less than intermar­ identity and continuity are belied by its for Jewish religious law's clear assertion riage. What goes by the name "religious recent actions and resolution. Verbal to the contrary, such a metamorphosis pluralism" in the American Jewish cosmetics cannot obscure the fact that world has wrought havoc with true Jew­ it has effectively neglected the "U­ ish unity. word", the first in the name United Jew­ ish Appeal. And so, the importing of the present American crisis to Israel is the very last Since its inception, UJA-Federation thing any caring, heartfelt Jew-what­ has dedicated itself to serving as a reli­ ever his or her personal religious con­ giously neutral agency to solicit and dis­ victions - should desire. tribute Jewish charity funds. Now, though, with its apparent readiness to The shiny, happy banner of"religious effectively recast itself as a lobbying diversity" that UJA-Federation has now group for the non-Orthodox Jewish raised high is, more accurately, a sign­ movements, it seems prepared to forfeit Dealers rn OW Hebrew Sefarim post on the road to the Jewish people's that historic mandate. dissolution. What is labeled diversity is BRING TORAH TO YOUR HOME THROUGH THE SEFARIM in reality a boon to disunity. Should UJA-Federation choose to PRINTED IN EUROPE continue along the path it is presently OVER 1HE LAST 300 YEARS o one, neither here in the Unit­ treading, it might well gain some finan­ BUYER'S GUIDE AND NEW LIST ed States nor in Israel, is trying cial support. AVAILABLE to deny any non-Orthodox Jew FREE OF CHARGE N the right to his beliefs. Nor is anyone But it will have squandered its most PHONE: JERUS!l.l.EM 500-0878 precious asset of all: its credibility. fAX: JERUSALEM 500-2262 questioning the Jewishness of non­ Orthodox Jews, as some imply. A Jew The above appeared as an Op-Ed piece in The Jew­ ish Week (Feb. 21, '97). is a Jew is a Jew. Period.

62 The Jewish Observer, April 1997 27 Main Street! Mansey, NY I Fax: 914-356-1343 I www. tarahschalalCam

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Marking three-quarters of a century of service on behalf of Klal Yisroel, under the leadership of our Gedolei Torah. At this momentous occasion, we will pause to pay tribute to those - past and present - who have contributed greatly to the growth of Agudath Israel on these shores, both in size and in scope. The 7 5th Anniversary Dinner of Agudath Israel of 1\inerica The New York Hilton Avenue of the Americas and 54th Street Join us in honoring the visionaries who helped forge a strong Agudath Israel over the past 75 years - and to look forward to our mandate for thefuture.