Smittcamp Scoop March 2012 Scoop March Smittcamp Spring Break Spring

Past, Present, and Future A Fond Easter terrified little children for pictures. Memory BY: JENNA MERSEREAU, Back in the day when I was one of those terrified little SOPHOMORE children, I harbored a healthy belief, fear, and respect for the Easter bunny. My parents, who claimed they were in contact with Santa, the tooth My story fairy, and the Easter bunny, wouldn’t were my source of knowledge be on how to properly interact complete with them in the hopes that without a each would bring me description something nice. of the Easter bunny. Since no one I was told Easter etiquette was has ever seen this elusive to stay in bed Easter morning. rodent, I suppose everyone If I went out and scared the pictures the Easter bunny a bunny, he might leave before little bit differently. Personally, he was done filling my basket I imagine the Easter bunny as (since the Easter bunny, like all a human-sized rabbit that hops bunnies, is easily startled). As on its hind legs while using its a kid who only got one candy forelegs to hold a basket filled for dessert each night after with delectable treats. It’s a lot dinner, I was sure to do all I like those grown people who could to load up on candy dress up as the Easter bunny when I could, and that meant in shopping malls who hold choosing to wait in bed until the Easter bunny was good makes when they mess around and done filling my basket. with that plastic grass that goes in an Easter basket, With this in mind, one Easter followed by the cracking of morning some time before I plastic eggs, the tinkle of was 8, I had woken up early coins, and the rattle of jelly in anticipation. I remember beans. The tile-hopping sound being hyper-awake, but not happened again, and the front daring to leave my bed until I door shut. got the ‘all-clear’ from my parents. During this waiting Maybe an hour later, I heard period, however, I heard a lot my parents get up and they of magical mojo go down. came over to my room to tell And I must add that, in my me the coast was all clear. state of excitement, my senses When I went out to check my were ultra-keen, so I am sure basket, sure enough, the eggs this is exactly what happened. were filled with coins and jelly beans!! Everyone except for me was asleep in the house and it was I will let everyone come to perfectly quiet, but the silence their own conclusion about this was broken by the sound of tale, but I think the most the front door opening. Then, I interesting thing that I learned heard the muffled sound of a from this experience is that, heavy creature with furry feet unlike Santa who uses the hopping across my front tile. chimney, the Easter bunny Next was the sound one prefers using the front door. My World 2.0 is so hilariously out of place that it’s great. REVIEW BY: SHAE DOUGAL, The next song, FRESHMAN “Somebody to Love”, is a throwaway. It wasn’t able to keep my attention, and I found my mind wandering. Already, however, I am beginning to see why people find themselves attracted to Bieber’s work. It exudes a sort of strange hypnosis, some subliminal message that preteen girls can’t resist. Sort of like me and cheese steaks. I am not a teenage “Stuck in the Moment” girl. Now that we have that out of reminded me of something I had the way, let’s throw all of my heard before by a different artist, other biases and preconceptions but I couldn’t place it. I liked this out of the window. Some people one more than “Somebody”, but really like Justin Bieber. Now, once again, a bit of a throwaway. there must be a reason. I’m going Bieber has a decent vocal range, to give “My World 2.0” an but I bet I can go lower than him, honest look in this article. and at least as high in terms of The album kicks off pitch. Just saying. with “Baby”, which kind of “U Smile” was next. sounds like The Jackson 5 if they Opening with a nice piano solo, did weird hip-hop songs. this song faltered from the Everyone in the whole world moment it slid into a heavily knows this song, so I don’t have overproduced doo-wop feel. I to say too much about it. Some don’t know if I’ve ever heard a lyrical thought would have been worse bass drum sound in music. nice. Costello’s “Beyond Belief” Not even Blue Öyster Cult’s this is not; it’s cringe--worthy to “Club Ninja”. The bass thud hear Bieber sing about buying his reminds me of the sound of me baby a ring. It’s actually kind of banging my head against the cute in a way…young unrequited wall. That’s all I have to say love. But it’s also so, so bad. The about this one. Ludacris breakdown literally By this point I was made me laugh out loud; the spot becoming a bit disillusioned with the album. “Runaway Love” was themes from “Overboard”, which I next. I liked the groove, but it was liked. It was essentially a interrupted and ruined rather combination of the inverted quickly by that hip-hop glissando drumrolls of “Rock You Like a where all the instruments drop out. Hurricane“, the acoustic of Sorry, I’m not hip to pop music “Go” (by a band called lingo. I don’t know if it has an Steriogram), and the odd middle official term or not, but I hate that. march of “Bring the Boys Back Other than that, it wasn’t bad. Home”, which made for a pretty Listenable. epic combination. It even has an “Never Let You Go”? obligatory key change when the Same mold as “Runaway Love”. songwriters realized that they were Simple groove, hideous bass, you repeating the chorus way too know. It’s a song about angels many times. taking Bieber to heaven. I’d rather Overall, this isn’t the the angels were trying to wear my second coming of pop music that red shoes, to be honest. so many preteens claim. But “Overboard” and really? It’s not as bad as all “real “Eenie Meenie” were both duets music fans” immediately label it. I with Bieber and some people I certainly don’t ever plan on didn’t recognize. “Overboard” listening to it again, because it’s was actually really good, with its not my stuff, but I’m glad that for orchestral themes and sweeping once in my life I was able to set crescendos. “Eenie Meenie” was aside my bias and give something horrible. Not even worth a second a chance for once. Not a great mention. album, but a good life experience. “Up” was kind of My score shall hopefully indicate depressing, and perhaps the this: simplest song on the record, mix- wise. Despite this, it actually made Justin Bieber: “My World 2.0”- the tune better. It reminds me of 4.5/10 some of Michael’s slower numbers. In fact, there are a lot of parallels with Michael Jackson’s music that I could discuss with a lot of these tunes. The last song was “That Should Be Me”, and it drew Occupy and the GOP similar they are, even though campaign: Clutching they believe in separate ideas. at Straws First point of interest - their BY: ABHIJIT SUPREM, focus. The Occupy protest has managed to connect with very FRESHMAN few people. How many of you think you, as part of the working class/middle class (albeit students) can manage the federal system? It is very difficult to actually do the job. The people who are in charge are there because they can actually manage the system. What the Occupy movement We’ve seen the Occupy should be focusing on is fixing campaign kick off. We’ve all the system, rather than ousting heard the hype and the allegedly inept officials. They (seemingly) huge amount of lack focus, an Achilles heel for support it has. The question to any aspiring movement. If we ask is, does it really do any were to look at the GOP side, good? Do its policies actually fix we would see the same thing. problems, or are they just cries Mitt Romney, in his recent for attention? And if we are on speeches, drones on and on the topic of reform and about cars he drove and how attention, why not also drag in much he loves cars. We get it. the GOP campaigners into this? You like them.Now get on with We have the playing field now. it. Or maybe, he has a guilty On one side, the ferocious, conscience (cue “Let Detroit go feral, furious Occupy protesters. bankrupt”)? Or, more likely, he On the other side, the isn’t really sure what to say, and conservative, cunning, collected so is trying to draw in voters Romney, Ron Paul, Newt with sympathy. Rick Santorum, Gingrich, and Rick Santorum. on the other hand, embodies an Since Ron Paul has not been entirely different spectrum of fairing well in the polls, and is a unfocused campaigning. He has really old dude, let’s not put somehow confused the him in the match we’re about to Constitution with theology, democracy with religion, and free career to keep a million jobs in the speech as non-separation of auto industry, even as Republicans church and state. It is this (and some Democrats) vehemently incoherent bumbling that reduces opposed it, saying it would the weight of the Republican destroy the country? President party. Perhaps some of you Obama. On the other hand, who support Santorum for his strict said he had created 100,000 jobs, ideals. That’s fine. Just, keep the a claim that was both “phony and church out of it. Onto Gingrich. unverifiable?” (The New Yorker). He is a great speaker. However, Mitt Romney. Moving on to Rick he isn’t that great at connecting to Santorum, he keeps talking about people. He has never quiet made how he wants to represent clear what his positions are, which America and lead it. Heads up, is why most Americans do not but America is a melting pot of all connect with him. faiths and traditions, not just Christian. ‘Nuff said. As for Let’s head on over to validity. The Gingrich, I’m going to bring up a Occupy protesters seem to think sorely contested idea here: if he they are right in defining cannot remain truthful to his wife themselves as the 99%. This could (s), after making promises to be not be wronger. First of all, people by her side “until death do them don’t think like that. Even though part” on the Bible, can he remain statistically, what they say may be truthful to the nation’s cabinet true, people just don’t think so. A after swearing upon the Bible? It’s study shows that 99% of people for you to decide. do NOT think they are part of the 99%. Rather, it is more along the There are certain parallels we can lines of 30% think they are 99%. draw between the Occupy That’s not valid at all. Looking at protesters and the Republican the Republicans, we can also find candidates, which is not to say these parallels. Mitt Romney keeps they are alike. They aren’t. But it is saying he cares about the strange that one can find some American people, that he is an similarities, just like there are agent of job creation, that he similarities between Presidents wants to fix America. Who then Lincoln and Kennedy. Some food was it that sacrificed his political for thought. Yes, I’ve Caught his first start and a few nights later, became a sensation by Linsanity Too! hitting a long 3 pointer just By: Nick Vizenor, Junior before the buzzer to clinch a victory over the Raptors. Linsanity was born, and in an otherwise boring dreary February, the nation and the world had a new star. In today’s NBA filled with egos, super teams, and “The Decision” hour long special, most of the storylines associated with basketball coverage are off the court in nature. Lin brought to the nation a true love for the game February and into early and humility. Lin didn’t go to a March is known as a notoriously powerhouse D-1 college and slow time in sports. The Super leave after one year for the NBA Bowl is over, baseball has yet to draft. He went to Harvard, got start, and March Madness is not his degree, and went undrafted quite here yet. However, as if after school. He took the hard right on cue, one man made the route to stardom, persevering past few weeks a whole lot more and playing the role of bench exciting. His name, a name warmer until he finally got his everyone now knows, is Jeremy shot. This is why I am so happy Lin. Lin, a point guard for the for Lin and have caught Linsanity New York Knicks who came out myself. He is different, and a of nowhere to become the feel breath of fresh air for what has good story of the year, has become a rather stale NBA filled sparked renewed interest in the with Lebron claiming to ignore his NBA for many fans, myself haters and Dwight Howard included. A perennial bench constantly complaining about warmer, Lin was a nobody who Orlando. Lin is known for his got put in to start for the Knicks game, and skills, not his big out of desperation; the Knicks mouth; he is real, and honest. He had been hit by the injury bug brought us all back to athletics and needed a healthy body to and the true meaning of sports. play. Lin made the most of his So here’s to Jeremy Lin, enjoy the opportunity scoring 25 points in moment: you deserve it! Easter Break (AN EXPLORATION IN POETRY STYLES) BY: PARKER, NALCHAJIAN

Haiku Everyone’s week off Spend time with friends? Vacation? I think I will sleep

Acrostic Sun to laze around in Parties to attend Running and playing Ignoring school work Needing sleep Getting far more than school ever allowed

But the term is rapidly ending Right around the corner Exam time Almost, not just yet Keep relaxing a little longer

Limerick In April, there comes our Spring Break That week off we gladly will take The death of our Christ It cannot be priced Life given for everyone’s sake. Shape Poetry (Concrete)

Jesus Christ, Son of God. All at once Man and God, He took upon himself the burden of man’s sin He died on that cross so that each of us lives Three days later, he rose triumphant from his tomb. The good news of God’s Love and his victory told at Easter reminds us that we owe it all to God; Jesus He died for you He died for me for that, I will live For his glory.