(pre-tax) 2009

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04 month RRP $ √-1 August

Discovering PR Stephenson Yves Klein Blue

Top of the Hill

Wearing Environmentalism

...and Horoscopes EXCLUSIVE

UQ SEMPER The Team READERS OFFER semper floreat Adminstrative Editor: Kiran Srinivasan E51 AVAIL.A IN • Thin, Stainless Publication BLACKBBLLALLACACKAACK & SILVERSILVVERERR Steel Design • 2 Megapixel Camera Editor: KKH HHARHAARRDD with Panorama Mode John Horsburgh WORKWOROORKR HAHARDH • Text to Speech Functionality BONUS PLAYPPLAPLLLAYAAYYYH HHHARDHAARRDD •Integrated MP3 Player C THETHE PPERFECTPEPERFECERFECRRFECFECT •Handsfree Speakerphone BUSINESSBUBUUSUSINSSINESSNNESNESSESSESSSS PHOPHONPPPHONEHHOONE Design Editor: Sarida McLeod

320GB PORTABLE UPFRONT ON A USB EXTERNAL Cover art: 320GB $ 3 HARD DRIVE $30 Phillip Helliwell INCLUDES BACKUP 0 PHONE PLAN Contributors: SOFTWARE! $720 over 24months Melissa Giles Anonymous law TELSTRA PRE-PAID admirer (read WIRELESS BROADBAND stalker) WHEN YOU CONNECT TO ANY OF THESE PHONES •PC or Laptop via USB •No Fixed Term Contracts or Bills Virginia Tapp CONTENTS (and hopefully you!) Go l d f i s h a r e c r ee p y (GENERAL)

INCLUDES Thanks to: From the Union 4 $40 of Calls & Data! Julie Goodwin, From the Editors 5 ALSO Mother Nature, Reality TV Shows We’d Like to See 7 AVAILABLE IN PINK Pablo Escobar, An Open (Rhyming) Letter to My Law Crush 12 Liverpool Football Working for the Man 20 Club, Godwin Horoscopes 27 Grech, Fluoridated Water and Andrew OR Flintoff An d sta r e at y o u l i k e t h e y w ant to k i l l y o u (FEATURES) UPFRONT ON A UPFRONT ON A $ 3 $ 3 Discovering P. R. Stephensen 8 $ F480F480 $ 9 Created using ••5 5MPMP CamCameraera withwith FaceFace $ China, Business and Our Future 17 W705 40 Detection •Bluetooth 40 InDesign 5 • WiFi •MP3 PHONE PLAN • Next G •Up to 8GB PHONE PLAN Wearing Environmentalism Well 18 • Expandable Memory 0 Expandable Memory 0 149 • HSDPA 7.2 Mbps $960 over 24months $960 over 24months Inc. $10 Data Printed by An d stea l y o u r so u l to u se i n e v i l f i s h -occ u l t (MUSIC) BUY ME Fast Proof Press ONLINE w

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WOW968 - UQ SEMPER FULL PAGE AD.indd 1 20/07/2009 10:23:36 AM Foar Everywun frum the Union

El Presidente (with accent) From the Editors.

Semester 2 is here! Forgive me Union offers students, they the interests of students on Dear reader, for being slightly over enthused pale in significance to the Food University Committees to seek for another academic semester, Court project currently being changes that will make student Woohoo! You have picked up a copy of Semper (or had one forced into your hand by a harassing stranger)! but I am extremely excited undertaken. life all the more enriching. about what lies ahead for the If you know what Semper Floreat is then we are all very Union in the coming months! In the coming weeks and Finally, I would like to impressed and flattered. We hope this issue continues months, students will be given announce that I have launched the trend of gradual improvement in the magazine. As a Firstly, I wish to extend a warm an insight into what they a facebook, twitter and blog. nod to the lineage of this publication we have an article welcome back to campus to can expect to see when the Please add me and follow me!! further on about a previous editor whose life serves as all the returning students, and hammers are put down and a reminder of Semper’s history. We hope his story and similarly, a warm welcome to construction is completed. You can find me under the the other ones on these pages will encourage you to any new students that may have Keep an eye out for information following names get involved in Semper through writing or any other joined us this semester. I hope booths and displays containing applicable talents you may have. everyone enjoyed the break and plans and drawings of the food - UQ_Union_Pres – Twitter If you do not know what Semper Floreat is then you is well rested for the coming court. - UQ Union President – have joined those on the path of enlightenment towards months. Facebook a once great part of university life. It has been our goal Unfortunately, due to the - UQ Union President – this year to build Semper back up to its former glory. Upon return to St Lucia, construction and works Blogger In order to achieve this end we send out the call, as students may notice some that are occurring, the main we do each issue, for input from writers and artists to changes occurring in the refectory has been closed. Have a great Semester!! contribute. Those who write for us are often provided Union complex. I am proud to During construction temporary with tickets to pre-release films or gallery exhibit announce that construction on food stalls will be setup to Brandon Carter openings for review. If this perk, or simply the sheer the UQ Union’s new food court help minimize the impact of UQ Union President glory of writing for such a cool publication, interests style precinct has begun! the closure of the you, then drop us a line (contact details are somewhere main refectory on this page; only the cunning will be able to find them). The FRESH UQ Union team and Subway will If you haven’t made it this far because you were is committed to delivering this continue to operate mugged on the way to the lakes by Ibises (or Ibii) project in a timely manner as normal. then Semper is very sorry. If you do manage to catch and we anticipate that in early a glimpse of this page on the ground in your struggle, October, St Lucia students and Whilst the new food our resident martial arts experts recommends grabbing staff will be able to experience a court is at the fore of them around their stupid bill and using it as a handle to new food concept on campus. everyone’s thoughts beat them to death on the ground. in the Union at the This year has already been a moment, it is not the Main Refectory I WANT YOU Without wax (you know you secretly love Dan Brown), big year for the UQ Union. only thing keeping FOR SEMPER The Second Degree Bar & us busy. Many is now closed for John Horsburgh on Behalf of the Editors Grill was renovated, revamped events are planned TO WRITE OR THINK OF ORIGINAL P.S. We are now narcissistic teenagers who can be found CANNIBALISATIONS OF GRAPHICS and rebranded, Darwin’s for the semester, renovations on both Twitter and Facebook. Become a fan and listen [email protected] Café was refurbished and, of the Student Support to us tweet incessantly at ‘semperfloreat’. course, Subway was brought Centre is almost GRAB ALL YOUR FAVOURITES AT on campus. Whilst all these ready to begin PHYSIOLOGY REFECTORY (BUILDING 63) Ph: (+617) 3377 2237 [We apologise to our extra- things have been major construction and the & BIOLOGY REFECTORY (BUILDING 94) terrestrial readers] achievements and improved office-bearers are the quality of service that the busy representing For more info go to www.uqunion.com.au [email protected] 4 Semper Floreat. The Goldfish Issue. Goldfish Bonanza Semper Floreat. 5 Caboolture line (all stations) Reality TV Shows We’d Like to See

Following the success of MasterChef, the creation The Big Give: Cabinet Edition of a weight-loss dance-off program, and my Like Oprah Winfrey’s show where contestants are realisation that there is actually a reality TV show challenged to spend money to help people. Instead, specifically for marrying off midgets, I thought it politicians must spend taxpayer’s money - whoever was time to stop asking the question ‘Has reality gets into the biggest deficit wins. Bonus points N310 TV gone too far?’ and instead focus our efforts on for the most money spent on wine and the most N330 the TRUE issue at hand…‘Has reality TV gone far creative pork-barrelling. enough?’. With that, I present you, dear readers, with: The Top 10 Reality TV Shows Semper N390 Would Like to See: N330

N199 Reality TV Shows We’dSuper Nanny: Like Celebrity to Lifestyles See N226 We hang your annoying kids over a N385 Big Brother: The Arab-Israeli Edition balcony. If they still misbehave, we give The Israeli and Palestinian leadership, locked in a small unit them to a crocodile. near Dreamworld. Hosted by Oprah with special intruders from Iran, Jordan, Syria and Lebanon. No one leaves until a peace agreement is signed. Entertainment and the solution to a decades-long conflict, all in one go. Survivor: Lecturers Special Ipswich line N250 (all stations) N200 15 UQ Lecturers, one small island on the Republic First Lady Swap of Micronesia. Will research into dystopias actually N412 N199 Michelle Obama v Carla Bruni. Obama help them create a functional society? What sexual rejoices about getting an absolute babe for tension will ensue? How does Game Theory work a wife. Sarkozy resigned to not wearing the N184 in real-life strategy and, most importantly, can pants once again. Bruce Littleboy build a hut out of tree bark?

The Racially Tolerant Life The Biggest Loser A KKK A Trekkie, a N111 member Dungeons and N130 N555 embarks on Dragons Nerd, N464 N100 a quest to Someone Who Can understand Quote 374 digits of Pi the civil and other stereotypes rights try to throw a party. movement. Beenleigh line The most socially (all stations) awkward function The wins. NightLink – stay connected all weekend. Mormon Wants a 23rd Wife Big Brother: The Buses hourly 1am – 5am. Trains from around 4am. FlatFare taxis from midnight. One man. 15 Australian Edition women. 22 The Australian protective government listens to wives. Can your calls and filters go card – no need to find change after your night out. he find true your internet, kinda love once like Iran and China. again?

ZOMGiggles it’s Goldfish!Semper Floreat. 7 24 hours a day, seven days a week The Queensland Government encourages responsible consumption of alcohol.

NightLink_Semper_210x297.indd 1 14/7/09 12:02:39 PM Discovering P. R. Stephenson

Stephensen edited the three 1921 editions of Galmahra, which are all archived at the political activities, which, somehow, did not UQ Fryer Library. Munro’s biography of prevent him from being awarded a Rhodes Stephensen describes how unsold copies of the Scholarship. In 1924, he sailed to England to controversial first issue, which included erotic study at Oxford, but before he left, he accepted poems by Jack Lindsay, were recalled. The first the role of Britain/Europe correspondent for issue also had an enthusiastic editorial in which Brisbane labour paper the Daily Standard. In the meaning of the new, shorter moniker London, his ‘dangerous’ political behaviour was explained: Galmahra was a Queensland gained him the attention of his university Aboriginal word for poet, seer, teacher or and the British secret service. Despite threats Discovering P. R. Stephensen philosopher, and also the name of a famous of expulsion, he eventually graduated from Aboriginal man who played a heroic role in the Oxford and remained in London, where he UQ Student Magazine Editor, 1921 1848 Kennedy expedition. started publishing books with Jack Lindsay.

Stephensen was passionately determined to improve the standard of Australian writing and sabotage. The leader of the group had already publishing, and to generate a truly ‘indigenous’ been imprisoned without trial for more than literature that Australians could be proud of. two and a half years, and was escorted to He developed with Norman Lindsay the idea Writer, editor and publisher, Percy Reginald the inquiry each day by a uniformed soldier. of establishing an Australian publishing house Stephensen (1901-1965), started his career When he entered the witness box his name was with these goals in mind. Despite ending as a UQ student magazine editor and went given as Percy Reginald Stephensen, though his relationship with the Communist Party on to become a significant literary figure. he was more widely known as ‘Inky’ or PRS. around this time, when Stephensen returned After learning that Stephensen was her On his first day in the stand he somewhat to Australia in 1932 to pursue this publishing grandmother’s cousin, Melissa Giles was disconcerted the court by describing himself mission, Britain’s director of MI5 made a point fortunate to discover that his life story had as a ‘Man of Letters’. It was a defiant but also of informing his Australian counterpart of been documented decades earlier by local an exact definition. Having been admired by Stephensen’s imminent arrival. biographer, Craig Munro. D.H. Lawrence, parodied by Aldous Huxley, trailed by MI5, and vilified as a traitor in his In contrast to the style of the modern UQ Wild Man of Letters also investigates My introduction to P.R. Stephensen was own country, P.R. Stephensen was indeed one of magazine, Semper Floreat, Galmahra was Stephensen’s career in Sydney, which included through a few key facts: he had been a Australia’s most remarkable men of letters. printed in black and white, slightly bigger starting his own publishing house, P.R. communist, a Rhodes scholar and an internee than A5 size and was almost completely text. Stephensen & Co., his fourth short-lived book in Australia during World War Two. This The story that followed this intriguing first The magazine was available by subscription publishing venture. It seems that this failure puzzling combination compelled me to seek paragraph explained how a country boy and its contents included news from various was partly due to bad timing, being in the out the details that bound his story together. from Biggenden, Queensland, enrolled at UQ colleges, clubs, sports teams and societies, midst of economic depression. However, the Fortunately, I found what I was looking for UQ in 1919 and became friends with the as well as poems and articles written mostly evidence in Munro’s biography also suggests in a meticulously researched, prize-winning student magazine editor, Jack Lindsay (artist by current and former students. Articles in that while Stephensen was overflowing with book, Wild Man of Letters: The Story of P.R. Normal Lindsay’s son). During Stephensen’s the1921 issues included such diverse titles as: entrepreneurial spirit, he lacked good business Stephensen (MUP, 1984) by Craig Munro (re- first year, he took to writing regular articles ‘Are Debates a Waste of Time?’, ‘How to Write a judgement and was often left poor and published by UQP in 1992). The first chapter, for the publication. In 1921, as a final year Humorous Joke’, ‘Should the Workers Control frustrated as a result. ‘Wartime Rebel’, began: Bachelor of Arts student, Stephensen became Industry?’ and ‘Anthropological Research in editor and changed the magazine’s name Australia’. Despite the ultimate collapse of these In September 1944 the Bankruptcy Court in to Galmahra from Queensland University businesses, Stephensen developed close Melbourne was the scene of one of the most Magazine. Stephensen’s student years were just the relationships with many important writers such sensational hearings in Australian history. But beginning of his lifelong career in the as D.H. Lawrence and Miles Franklin, and was this had nothing to do with bankruptcy. It was publishing business and as a political radical. involved with the editing or publishing of some a commission of inquiry into the internment significant literary works, including Australian of a group suspected of plotting treason and Munro’s biography, Wild Man of Letters, also illuminates the young communist’s increasingly classic Xavier Herbert’s Capricornia.

Semper Floreat. Serious Goldfish. Semper Floreat. Fish of Golden Yore. Discovering P. R. Stephenson

days) in the publication of a secret edition Stephensen, too, produced many books, of D. H. Lawrence’s ‘obscene’ novel, Lady probably the most influential being The Chatterley’s Lover. Stephensen’s life ended Foundations of Culture in Australia: An Essay suddenly and dramatically that day when he towards National Self Respect (1936). died of a heart attack on stage, after being enthusiastically applauded for his brilliant Stephensen’s vigorous nationalism (and speech. possibly his financial dependence on wealthy magazine owner, William Miles) contributed Turning the last page of Stephensen’s to shifting his political sympathies further to biography I felt sad, but also enriched—not the right. In the lead up to the Second World only by the valuable insight Munro’s research War, through Miles’ anti-Christian and anti- had provided into Stephensen’s motivations communist magazine, The Publicist—part and achievements, his flaws and strengths, of the Australia First political movement— but by gaining a better understanding of Excellence Stephensen’s writing increasingly espoused 20th century history through the lens of anti-Semitic sentiments, and support for his life. Although I disagree with many of fascism, the Germans and the Japanese. This Stephensen’s extreme political views, I don’t led to official censorship of the magazine in feel personally affected or embarrassed by 1940. them, as some of my older relatives may have been; instead, I am proud that he did In 1942, when Stephensen was The Publicist’s has a name. write—he didn’t resort to means such as editor, a raid on a separate Australia First violence to assert these ideas. He also used group in Perth uncovered documents his formidable talents to produce a great outlining treasonous plans. Munro explains deal more, including reviews, histories, how Stephensen was incorrectly implicated, biographies and even translations. Now, I and how, despite never being convicted of the want to read as much of Stephensen’s (and crime, he was interned until the war was over. Frank Clune’s!) work as I can. Thankfully, popular author, Frank Clune, continued to employ Stephensen as a ghost- Melissa Giles writer for his books, as he had done since 1936.

The final part of Wild Man of Letters tells Stephensen’s post-war story. He returned to the literary world in Sydney after a decade of self-imposed exile, Congratulations to University of Queensland B.Arts/B. Laws student authored more books, Catherine Drummond who has won the 2009 PricewaterhouseCoopers Excellence Award. became a literary agent and worked for a The Award is open to students from all degree disciplines who have demonstrated short time at Angus & achievement in their studies and beyond. Robertson. In 1965, he was invited to speak at To learn more about Catherine’s achievements, and the career opportunities an annual literary event PwC offers, visit our website. Start creating your own outstanding resume now. at the Savage Club about censorship and his role pwc.com/au/careers (during his London

Semper Floreat. The Goldfish Issue.

What would you like to be? An open (rhyming) letter1 to my law crush…

AKA: Poems… always a sign of pretentious inner turmoil2

To the guy I have a crush on… The guy I’ve seen around UQ I think we’re in the In the hallowed halls of Forgan Smith same cohort My heart beats only for you But I really can’t be sure (At least not since last year I first noticed you in first year And the restructure8 of the school of law) In the lecture we both shared 3 Across the crowded, noisy room Just an example to prove my love: I saw you and I stared… If I was Donoghue9 - I’d drink ginger beer with eau de snail The room grew hushed, the crowd dispersed Just because it came from you My eyes were drawn to you, my Prince4 You smiled in my direction You’ve carved a spot inside my heart And I’ve loved you ever since And I hope for you I’ve done the same What do you say I let my butt We’ve shared some beautiful experiences Bear the tattoo of your name?10 Well… that is… been to the same class I tried to concentrate on Contract 5 I’m despondent now just thinking But all I could think of was your glass(es) Of the time we might have spent But all this time I’ve been too shy One sweet time you waved at me To tell you what you meant And my heart skipped a beat 6 Then the girl behind waved back at you It’s scary to admit this And I slunk down in my seat But where you go, so goes my nation11 And so I beg you please But still I’m not discouraged Show me some consideration12 For I know your heart is true Just like Ariel and Eric And now the class is ending Our love is fishy too And since you still don’t have a clue, Here’s my written confession: In every lecture I attend I am in love with you. There is but one face that I seek And when you turn and look my way 7 I really think you’re perfect My knees and heart go weak And I think we should be dating (But if that’s not an option 13 1 Otherwise known as a ‘poem’ I’d be happy just with mating ) . 2 I’d like to say I made this up out of the squishy goodness of my own brain, but in the interest of truth, disclosure, and … well… actually passing my law degree, I feel I have a duty to inform you that this quote is by Xander Harris from an episode called ‘Help’ in Season 7 of ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’. Which, of course, you knew. EVERYONE is a closet Buffy fan. 8 Read: mass confusion. 3 Hey, it was Contract… did ANYBODY listen? 9 Come on kids, this is an easy one. Donoghue v Stevenson [1932] AC 562. 4 Gratuitous, I know, but I had to make it rhyme. Sorry, but I couldn’t resist. 5 They look really, really good on you. However, your lack of 20/20 vision may 10 See further, Regina v Wilson [1997] QB 47. HILARIOUS case. Google it. have a detrimental impact on our future offspring. On another note, you also have 11 Quoter: Oz (the werewolf). Episode: Homecoming. Season: 3. Show: Best a really hot ass. TV show ever made. 6 Bitch. Whore. WHORING BITCH. 12 Ha…. Ha. PS: Non-law kids: it’s a law joke. 7 This may in fact be due to a medical problem. 13 I’m… um… not joking. (*seedy wink*). The Goldfish Issue. Semper Floreat. 13 Interview with Yves Klein Blue

I’ll start with the obvious So when it came to writing, we wrote that – probably Bruce other level headed, just with question. How did you guys get how did that work? Did you do Springsteen or something – but our humour. And you might be together? a lot in the studio, or out of the yeah, we were just influenced able to read humour as group Interview with studio, or with the producer? by things around us and just bullying within the band. It’s Well, Michael and Charles started came out with something like easy to gang up on each other, playing together in different band Let’s say... we had a lot of that, and it feels really good to you know? incarnations when they were at homework. We work in me because it feels like we’re school. Then they met Chris, Yves Klein Blue the studio for 10 hours or maturing I think, as song writers So which one’s the one that gets and Charles and I were in one of something, then we go home, and as a band and as a live unit ganged up on? the same music lectures. We just we make dinner and then we as well – that kinda excites me, Kiran Srinivasan kinda all got together one day kinda sit around and figure it you know? Well, it changes. That’s part of interviews and kept getting together and Sean Cook out. We sit around with the fun. We all get a haven’t stopped. (Bass) guitars and sing like 20 chance to be the bully different melodies and and to be bullied. Fun You guys got picked up by Triple So you guys have toured with a lot of big acts and that kind of go ‘no, that’s not quite for everyone, that’s J and then won the MTV Kick thing. Like the Living End, The Fratellis, The Grates, You Am I. right’ and then we go what I say. I don’t Start competition. What was it What’s it been like touring with the big names? back to the first one we know, I think Charles like going through those two thought of, and we’d definitely gets more phases and building up your fan Well, it’s usually good. I mean, you don’t actually get to spend as go through different than his fair share. base? much time with them as you may think. Cause we don’t all get a parts and so we’d go That’s just because he big bus – which would be amazing... So it’s not quite like Almost home and we’d be up seems to be the laziest. It seems very natural to me cause Famous – which I was told it was, so I’m a little annoyed. But no, late. Michael especially He’s also the most I guess it’s the only thing I’ve it’s actually really fun. Like for instance with the Living End guys would be up to all naturally gifted. He’s a really known. We won the MTV – they’re really lovely and we got to hang out with them every now hours of the night. He’d freaking genius, that Kick Start competition in I think and again. Touring with nice people is fun, regardless of how big go into the bathroom, kid. Seriously, he’s so March 2007, and then we gave a their band is. If they’re nice then it’s going to be fun. If they’re a because there weren’t sleepy. But I find him few things to Triple J - but it wasn’t big band and they’re arseholes, it’s not going to be fun. Luckily we really many places we such an interesting really until we released the EP haven’t come across to many of them! could go in the flat guitarist and I really with Polka on it that we really got we were staying in, to like his playing – funny that major support from Triple So you guys are just about to release your new album, Ragged write lyrics at night. that. J and that was I think February and Ecstatic. So take me through the building of that? of last year. Also with being on The new album has So after your tours, the Mitsubishi commercial – the Well, pretty much as soon as we released the EP we began writing a fairly distinctive have you got any single got kinda boosted again. this record. So we just wrote about 30 songs I think until we sort sort of sound - a bit plans yet? Any albums of said ‘these 14 or 15 are the best of them’. We made a short list different to what we planned or do you Do you guys write a lot of the of producers and Kevin was right near the top of the list. And heard on the EP. Was sort of just take it as it songs together or does one of you luckily, we called around and he was really keen to do and it felt that intentional or just comes? guys mainly write them and you good so we booked him in and we hopped on a plane and went how you guys grew as come up with ideas? off to Hollywood. Kevin really questioned us and challenged us a band? Well, yeah, I think we on song structures and tried to make them as strong as possible. I How have you guys coped with take it as it comes. Who knows Michael does the…let’s say the think we came through it certainly with much stronger songs... and I don’t think we ever success? what we’ll be doing. Maybe we’ll lion’s share of the writing and he hopefully people agree. So whilst we had to work really hard for intentionally said like ‘okay, do a tour to Norway. I hear it’s writes all of the lyrics as well. So it, it was a pretty satisfying and fulfilling process. Not without its we’ve done Polka, now we want I think we’ll cope with it the lovely this time of year. Yeah, lyrics is all Michael, and music, or trials. To bring back what is starting to feel like a bit of a lame little to do something different’. I same way you cope with I don’t really know what we’re at least a lot of the time, at least for link we’ve made – but the name Ragged and Ecstatic really does think if we did that, at least at anything. You’re thrust into doing after this tour. I kinda this record, Michael would come capture us and the certain feel about the making of the record and this stage, it would be weird and it and you just deal with it by keep my eyes not too far ahead. in with an idea, or he might have the band. That we’re equal parts ragged and ecstatic. It was a really a bit fake. It’s not necessarily being…by trying to be the It’s kinda scary to do that. At a verse structure and we’ll play fun, enjoyable, exciting time, recording our debut record. I mean, that we sat down and said ‘okay, human you are. I don’t think the moment I’m just focussing around with that and things will what is that? That’s amazing. But we had to work really hard for it we want to write a song with a any of us really have any kind on the next five weeks, this tour change, grooves will develop and at the same time. Similar thing with our band. We were a bit rough catchy piano hook and a good of huge complexes. I think that and just having a really fun time. change and we’ll kinda make a around the edges but we’re very excited to be doing what we’re beat’. It’s just, I can’t remember we’re fairly level headed, and if song. doing. what we were listening to when not, we’ll certainly keep each Semper Floreat. Goldfish are Hip. Ragged and Goldfishy. Semper Floreat. Section Name China, Business and Our Future

ith the recent arrest of Great Wall Motors despite in the British and American Wof Mr. Stern Hu and foreign courts banning the Peri centuries from superpowers his three Chinese associates, from Europe. with very similar cultural further questions have been identities and fundamental raised about the apparent The malevolence of such beliefs that eased relations, not perils of doing business in actions is difficult to determine only on a state level, but also China. Whilst charges are when the issue of cultural between companies seeking to NEED HELP yet to be laid (at the time of difference is raised. Even before engage in each others’ markets. writing) and there may well be the days of communism, China evidence to support the claims has had a strong tradition Semper is not suggesting the WITH YOUR that the Rio Tinto executive of communitarianism. This Reds will invade and all of was stealing state secrets, the position is fundamentally our wonderful cultural icons situation remains dubious. The different from the liberal one such as the Hills Hoist and TAX RETURN? possibility that the Chinese taken by western companies Vegemite will be replaced with government has taken a looking to invest in China. Chinese imitations. However, political prisoner in the fallout Notions of sovereignty university students should over the failed Rio-Chinalco (in particular intellectual bear these abstract political UQ Union has set up a deal is certainly humbling sovereignty) vary across the factors in mind when choosing Tax Help Centre where for people destined to enter cultural divide, making it electives. Comparative cultural markets with a rising China. difficult for investors to get an studies may seem like a ‘bank you can get free help with accurate image of the market. with a w’ to many students, lodging your tax return. In the past there have been Whilst this may all seem but given the realities of our many other cases of Western abstract and removed from the eventual employment it may be corporations encountering world of university where we a wise move to pick up a little If you are a UQ student unusual challenges in their are cosseted from the ebbs and appreciation for Confucianism s WHOSETAXAFFAIRSARESIMPLE dealings with the People’s flows of the market, we all do or Cantonese (without Republic. Car manufacturer however, from time to time, becoming a snide, grey-haired s MADELESSTHANWITHINTHE Fiat has experienced great think about the prospect of politician who shall remain lNANCIALYEAR frustration in terms of their employment and careers. unnamed). Many people rightly intellectual property when see electives as a ticket to an 515NION4AX(ELP#ENTRECANHELPYOU cheap Chinese copies of their It is not only the commerce easy grade but Semper suggests cars were produced without students who need to consider (especially for impressionable &ORMOREINFORMATIONORTOBOOKAN their permission and directly the impact of China’s trade first years) multitasking easy APPOINTMENTPLEASECALL in violation of western law. practices. As we all move assessment with possibly useful The Great Wall Peri produced into our respective fields of information*. in China is a doppelganger engineering, psychology or for Fiat’s best selling small car, dole-bludging we will be *Other useful subjects include the Panda. Resolution of this exposed to the influence of History of Erotic Narrative and $$$? matter has proven difficult trade and foreign relations The Philosophy of Time Travel. as Chinese courts have, with the rising power of China. unsurprisingly, found in favour Australia benefited greatly

Goldfish: sadly not worth their weight in actual gold.Semper Floreat. 17

4HISPROGRAMISSPONSOREDBYTHE!4/ANDVOLUNTEERSHAVEBEEN TRAINEDBYTHE!4/

Semper Ad_Tax Centre.indd 1 15/7/09 2:08:57 PM energy sources, such as solar or hydropower. Now for action yet only triggering people to open their leaders. that’s a personal sacrifice with immediate and wallets. People think their work is done once they positive effects on the environment, as opposed to have bought shoes made using recycled materials. 3. Become one of the Australian youth delegates to one that leaves you feeling uber cool but lacking any UN forums around the world discussing the pressing tangible result. While the words ‘climate’, ‘greenhouse effect’ and environmental issues. ‘carbon emission’ may well be last season, Nathan While the originals probably were made of organic and his team are reinventing them so that action is Or cotton, hand weaved and stitched, and miraculously accessible to younger citizens with fresh approaches. locally produced regardless of where you come Not to say that the middle-aged men and women in 4. You can speak out in key climate change forums from, later en masse production did not follow suits and skirts haven’t been tackling the problem to and represent the youth perspective to decision strict production criteria of Anya Hindmarch. They the best of their ability, just that it’s time to add some makers. were made in China using cheap labour, before a new terms to our environmental vocabulary. few thousand litres of fuel were used to ship them However, the ideas we have on our clothes are not to Hollywood where you had to be a celebrity to In the same way as many minds will solve a jigsaw all bad, and can work miracles if they do in fact have one anyway. So, if production and exclusivity faster than just one, imagine the diversity of materialise into action. Elvery recommends taking counteract the positive effects of eco-fashion, why approaches possible if the shopoholics of Australian yourself up to the Brisbane Office in The Valley, do we continue to wear our environmental opinion youth put their minds to the issue of climate change. joining the AYCC, and THEN wearing clothes that make your actions known to everyone who walks past you in the street. Rather than Wearing Environmentalism Well buying the clothes as a promise to yourself that one day you will join the local Tree Planting Committee, do the good deed first. Fashionable tree-hugger on our sleeves? Because real action is far too This is what the AYCC asked themselves before This way the words aren’t empty and they will have hard, requiring too much effort, unnoticeable and deciding to combine 28 pre-existing Australian youth way more impact when combined with the natural thankless. Just ask Nathan Elvery. organisations to a form a coalition with the aim environmentally friendly aura you will emit. “Oh look, it’s Sienna Miller carrying an ‘I heart of tackling environmental issues in a fresh way. the earth’ bag and wearing a green T-Shirt; she While your friends will always gasp and say, They found out exactly what happens when a So we’re not saying the only true environmentalists must really care about the environment”. This is ‘And its from Tree of Life as well!’, the tree group of young adults ranging from 16-24 are those who shower once a week and wear leaves, usually the automatic conclusion drawn on first that isn’t uprooted can never give such years of age, and hailing from all four corners not hair clips, in their hair. No, you don’t have to look observation of someone in the street donning a encouragement. Nor can it tell others how of Australia, put their heads together on the like you were raised with wolves. In fact, I notice koala friendly slogan. However, on closer scrutiny, your visits to schools teaching children stagnating problems of our environment. Nathan is exceptionally well groomed. Just make we realize that there is often no link between the the importance of trees resulted in the You can too. But first, I’ll give you sure you back up your positive fashion choices with individual’s environmental attitude and the clothes owner of a large corporation with sense a taste of just some of the non- positive environmental choices. they wear. Or that the link is tenuous and does not enough to reconsider fashion related alternatives Virginia Tapp extend to actively reducing negative environmental an irresponsible offered by AYCC to get impacts, as demonstrated by organisations such as redevelopment project. your greenie engine the Australian Youth Climate Coalition. But more Nathan is Director revved: about that later. Right now we need to explain how of Youth Climate an environmentally friendly fashion choice is not Leadership at the AYCC 1. Power Shift: a budding glamorous and any positive effects that happen to Brisbane office, and he initiative to centre result are actually negated by the production process. knows exactly how real the debate of climate steps towards saving change with Australian Before reaching for the ‘I’m not a plastic bag’ bag, the environment are Youth that was recently consider whether the inspirational statement on your almost indiscernible launched at Sydney handbag will outweigh the environmental cost of amongst the Opera House. the bag. The answer is probably ‘no’, as it’s unlikely increasing traffic that the bag you carry will have enough power to of environmental 2. If you missed Power influence an individual’s firmly set ideals and beliefs fashion. Real Shift, meet its big sister, about personal environmental approaches. Instead, environmental the Youth Climate the money spent on this outrageously overpriced enthusiasts voices Leadership Program, bag could go towards real scientific research are drowned out by which provides training endeavouring to uncover clean and sustainable the slogans screaming and opportunities for the Not-so-fashionable tree-hugger next generation of environmental

18 Semper Floreat. Goldfish Galore. Gold. Semper Floreat. 19 Working for the Man

some of the loveliest people I’ve ever worked for staircase to career success. anywhere, and working there was like working in Working for legal nirvana. At the same time, when your bosses Most interesting of all was that in the interview to get are staying back til 9pm working on that submission this job, the HR Manager didn’t really care about my they’d started preparing with you at 2pm, when they’re affiliations and executive positions with various law walking around in Jimmy Choo shoes and even the societies. Upon deciding my GPA was passable, uni the Man clerks are decked exclusively by Veronika Maine – life hardly got a look at. What she was really interested you better be dressed to the nines and ready to pull a in was my background as a bartender and my over- good 10 - 12 hour day or you’re just not pulling your commitment to debating. She wanted to know what arrived at work a few days ago to find my computer were frantically filling out clerkship applications, have weight. It’d be fine if what you’re doing is worthwhile experiences outside of the law school I had to draw Iscreen upside down. Not the monitor itself – just the felt the tension of the law library as we struggle to get and interesting. I, however, was busy performing the upon in my work for them. What she admitted to after display. I paused for a moment to contemplate just how good GPAs which would DECIDE THE REST OF OUR important task of changing diagram boxes from pale to I got the job as well, was that, quite frankly, it’s really such an amusing yet highly inconvenient thing could LIVES, and noted the way hierarchies automatically royal blue. annoying to train a hard-core Mallesons girl up in the have occurred, dismissed the idea of computer pixies, form in certain social circles based on who was working slightly-but-oh-so-importantly different Freehills style. and went to dial x5999 on my work phone. Dave the IT for what firm. In fact, I actually had a guy decide to re- In the end, what my great top-tier law firm job Support Guy would save me. ignite our highschool friendship just to get employment REALLY translated into was working long hours filing So, as it turns out, switching out of the top-tier world tips. I knew, in short, that this was no insignificant paper whilst getting glimpses of absolutely amazing into a position where I can actually get some ownership Just that he couldn’t. break at the age of 18. and inspiring people who flitted in and out to hand me of my work, albeit in a slightly less glamourous office, more paper and thank me occasionally. Oh, and with could be setting me up much better than years of filing See, a month ago I would have been working with my Thanks to our friend GFC however, I was soon made no job security because I was a casual (I have a friend ever could. I set my own agenda, I walk into the office beautiful top-tier law firm LCD screen, on the top floor into a ‘Business Services Casual’, which, for those of you who waited 9 weeks without being contacted before and decide what I think is important to do at what of my beautiful Central Plaza 1 workplace, basking who don’t speak ‘law’, is a euphemism for ‘Office Bitch’. deciding she should probably start looking elsewhere). time, and once I work out how to say ‘philanthropy’ in brilliant air-conditioning, floor to ceiling windows I was getting paid an absolutely amazing casual rate to Sure, everyone has to start from somewhere, but what without lisping and get good at my job, I imagine and, most importantly, 24-hour IT support. I would sort through mountains of filing, remove post-it-notes I’m saying is – chill out. If you are not working for a I’ll also get that legendary thing we know as ‘job have picked up my phone, dialled Dave’s number, from discovery documents, move aforementioned top-tier law firm at the age of 9, it’s really quite okay. satisfaction’. and he would have logged on by proxy and fixed the mountains of filing from one massive folder to another You are not missing out on the magical and glitzy Sarida McLeod problem within seconds. I’d then get a message in my massive folder, and remind our dear Partners that their integrated Outlook/Microsoft Office/Client Database wives existed. It was a chance to mingle with the high- system providing me with a reference number just in flying corporate lawyers, to be on first name terms with case I wanted a second opinion from one of our Sydney people law students fall over backwards just to meet friends (the business and to generally partake in services department is If you are not working for a top-tier all the perks of working for QUEENSLAND BALLET AND RYDGES SOUTH BANK PRESENT QUEENSLAND BALLET PRESENTS nationalised to maximise a top-tier law firm (free gym efficiency, naturally). law firm at the age of 9, it’s really quite membership included). okay. You are not missing out on the Instead, what I magical and glitzy staircase to career What I did then was quit ACTUALLY did was after 3 days and take on the crawl into the dusty success. position of Philanthropy cavern that is the area Manager for Queensland CHOREOGRAPHED BY under my desk, fidget with some cables, check the Youth Orchestras. Our building is falling down, my FRANÇOIS KLAUS Custom Panel, arrive at absolutely no solution, and then phone line gets jammed with calls to the fax machine, call our General Manager on his mobile so he could tell there are a grand total of 4 staff members and everyone me the exact 5-click, 12-key e-jiggle required to make thought I was crazy to take the job. ‘Do whatever you this baby work. have to do to stay at Freehills,’ my father said, ‘it’ll set you up in the long-run’. What he didn’t realise, however, Did I miss Dave the IT Support Guy? Heck yes. Did I is that there really isn’t a great deal of glamour and INTERNATIONAL DANCERS A MAGICAL TALE OF GODS regret my decision to move from Eagle Street to the Old job satisfaction in filing for 8 hours a day, no matter AND CHOREOGRAPHERS JOIN AND FAIRIES, MISCHIEF AND Museum Building? Hells no. how beautiful your office is. Sure, I was on very good QUEENSLAND BALLET IN A JOYOUS MISADVENTURES. terms with some of the solicitors there (and I’ll admit, CELEBRATION OF DANCE! What happened was this: In November of last year, I’m hoping that WILL set me up in the long-run), but I was offered an awesome 3-day-a-week job doing the great majority of them only saw me as another 7–9 AUG 13–15 AUG Document Production at Freehills. As a second-year secretary, there to fix up their PowerPoint presentations PLAYHOUSE, QPAC PLAYHOUSE, QPAC law student, this was probably my equivalent to winning and clear the mounds of paper from their desks. MasterChef, though potentially with less chocolate YOUTH/STUDENT TICKETS $55* YOUTH/STUDENT TICKETS $48* and no crying. I’d been there when all my older friends Now, don’t get me wrong, the Freehills people were *includes qtix booking fee

Dancers: Clare Morehen & Christian Tátchev Photographer: David Kelly Dancer: Rachael Walsh Photographer: David Kelly 20 Semper Floreat. Fish. The Goldfish Issue. Semper Floreat. 21 BOOKINGS: qtix 136 246 or www.qtix.com.au www.queenslandballet.com.au / fi nd us on Facebook UPCOMING ARTISTS

The This Town Needs Guns

Bottom This “math/indie-rock” (please don’t ask me what that means) from the UK has an amazing uniqueness to 100 the sound they produce. Having just released their debut album, Animals, Semper’s semi-definitive list of overplayed, overly-dramatically and generally bad songs that have the band mixes arpeggiaic Radiohead- worked their way into an otherwise functional society. Some of these songs have a dear place in the In-Rainbows-esque guitar licks with hearts of we editors so please don’t feel we are having a hate-fest. Unless you like Ricky Martin in polyrhythms and complex drum which case there may be lynchings in your future. lines, - providing for exciting and interesting listening. If you appreciate

1. Achy Breaky Heart 28. Sadie the Cleaning 52. Back for Good 76. Sex Bomb technical skill and subtle intricacies in Billy Ray Cyrus Lady John Farnham Take That Tom Jones production, definitely worth a look. 2. My Heart Will Go On 29. Shuttuppayaface 53. Jesse’s Girl 77. Mr Sandman as sung Celine Dion Joe Dolce Rick Springfield by any barbershop 3. Silent Night as sung by 30. You’re Beautiful 54. Heal the World quartet small children James Blunt Michael Jackson 78. True Colours 4. Pachabel’s Canon in D 31. The Entertainer/ Fur 55. More Than Words Kasey Chambers Pachabel Elise/ Chopsticks Extreme 79. Special Two Sugar Army 5. Barbie Girl Aqua 32. Brick as done by shit 56. Happy Birthday Missy Higgins 6. Never Gonna Give You Schonnell Theatre guy as sung by off-key 80. The Crazy Frog Song Up Rick Astley 33. Wind Beneath My families everywhere 81. God Defend New Hailing from Perth, Sugar Army have 7. Any Enya song Wings Bette Midler 57. Stairway to Heaven as Zealand brought 90s grunge out from the gallows 8. Any Backstreet Boys 34. Do You Believe In Love played by beginner 82. Everybody Have Fun song Cher guitarists in Allans Tonight and fused it with modern indie-rock. The 9. Love Will Tear Us 35. You Raise Me Up 58. Waterloo ABBA Wang Chung band has been touring with Karnivool Apart Joy Division Westlife 59. Hello Lionel Richie 83. Video Killed the Radio 10. St. Anger the album 36. The Hampster Dance 60. Smoke on the Water Star The Buggles and Harlequin League and just released 11. Sk8r Boi Hampton the as played by beginner 84. Crank That their new album, The Parralells Amongst Avril Lavigne Hampster guitarists in Allans Soldier Boy 12. Strawberry Kisses 37. Total Eclipse of the 61. This is the Song That 85. Sexual Healing Ourselves. Tracks ‘Maybe the Boy who Cried Nikki Webster Heart Bonnie Tyler Never Ends Marvin Gaye Wolf was just Paranoid’ and ‘Tongues in 13. Uptown Girl 38. Ice Ice Baby Vanilla Ice 62. The Wheels on the Bus 86. Pretty Fly Billy Joel 39. Wild Wild West 63. Love Story Offspring Cheek’ are signature tunes you shouldn’t 14. Wake Me Up Before Will Smith Taylor Swift 87. Welcome to My Life miss. You Go-Go Wham! 40. Who Let The Dogs Out 64. Sex Machine Simple Plan 15. I’m Too Sexy The Baha Men James Brown 88. I Just Wanna Live Right Said Fred 41. I Feel Pretty West Side 65. Baby Got Back Good Charlotte 16. Do Ya Think I’m Sexy Story Sir Mixalot 89. Enrique Iglesias: The Rod Stewart 42. Catch My Disease 66. I Will Always Love You Complete Works 17. Wuthering Heights Ben Lee Whitney Houston 90. Screamo of any kind Kate Bush 43. Oops I Did It Again 67. The Real Slim Shady 91. Yellow Coldplay 18. She Bangs Britney Spears Eminem 92. Sex on Fire Friendly Fires Ricky Martin 44. Jenny From the Block 68. Torn Kings of Leon 19. Mmm Bop Hanson JLo Natalie Imbruglia 93. Take On Me Aha 20. The Final Countdown 45. Rhinestone Cowboy 69. The Sweetest Thing 94. I’m Blue (Da Ba Di) Floating around Australia at the moment, Friendly Fires Europe Glen Campbell U2 Eiffel 65 21. Don’t Cha 46. Kiss Kiss 70. Genie in a Bottle 95. Everytime We Touch are another dance-punk/synth-pop/shoegaze/whatever Pussycat Dolls Holly Valance Christina Aguliera Cascada band hell-bent on indie-cising sub-electro. Compared 22. Cotton-Eyed Joe 47. Annie’s Song 71. What About Me 96. Numa Numa Song fat Rednex John Denver Shannon Noll dude to bands like MGMT and Passion Pit, Friendly Fires are 23. The Ketchup Sing 48. You’re Body Is A 72. Memory Cats 97. Don’t Speak a great ‘happy-go-dancy’ band to whip out at parties. Las Ketchup Wonderland 73. The Locomotion No Doubt 24. Macarena Lucifer (Los John Mayer Kylie Minogue 98. Lady Marmalade every Check out ‘Skeleton Boy’ and ‘Paris’ from their self- Del Rio) 49. Whenever Wherever 74. Let’s Get Physical singer we hate titled album. 25. Christmas Macarena Shakira Olivia Newton-John 99. Because I Got High 26. Techno Macarena 50. Anything by Yoko Ono 75. The Lube-mobile song Afroman 27. Bette Davis Eyes 51. Raspberry Beret as sung by annoying 100. Smells Like Teen Spirit Gwyneth Paltrow Prince kid Nirvana

22 Semper Floreat. Songs for Goldfish: an actual Ben Folds album. What this town REALLY needs, is Goldfish.Semper Floreat. 23 for the ARIAs, we wanted to do something different Well, for a start we’re in the process of signing a on stage. So we got a string quartet to perform with rapper from Victoria. He’s a younger fella, and he’s us and it worked really so we started performing also doing our support for our State of the Art Tour. Top of the Hill (YO) live with a string quartet. We wanted to bring a We’re signing him ‘cause we like what he’s doing with Kiran Srinivasan uniqueness to our live sets. One thing led to another hip-hop and he stands on his own two feet. We feel and we ended up doing a remix album with a he needs a bit more exposure than what he’s getting. With the recent release of their new album, State of done, then the track and 32-piece orchestra. The label is going to be a hip-hop label. We’ll keep it the Art, the Hilltop Hoods are one of the hottest names lyrics get done. After that pretty small. A few well known, a few up-and-coming on the Aussie music scene at the moment. The new DJ Debris comes along and And that was The Hard Road Restrung, and the and maybe a few international artists as well. album, produced with their own record label, Golden lays cuts and scratches and Adelaide Symphony who worked with you on State Era Records, debuted at #1 on the ARIA charts, was that sort of thing to fill in the gaps, or as a chorus or of the Art. Take us through how that came out. Yeah, it’s good to get behind those up-and-coming certified Gold within a week and has since gone whatever comes naturally and stylistically, I suppose. There was so much hype after The Hard Road and hip-hop artists. Platinum, spending two weeks at #1. I caught up with The Hard Road Restrung. How did you guys cope Definitely. In the last 5 years, Australian hip-hop has MC Pressure from the group... And with such an emphasis on lyrics in hip-hop, do with that and how did you get the album together? come leaps and bounds. In every respect, there are you and Suffer ever differ on views? I guess when there’s pressure about doing something, so many artists making quality hip-hop now. They’re Now, you guys are virtually the founders of ‘Aussie I guess socially and politically and as far as our you start thinking “shit, some people think this getting more media coverage and exposure, more hip-hop’. How did you get together? opinions on hip-hop and music taste goes, we’re and other people think this”. But at the end of the positive feedback and more people going to their Me and Suffer went to high school in 1990 and we 99% on the same page. So that makes it easy to work day we thought ‘well fuck it; let’s just make it the shows. It’s really popular with the youth, so it’s only were both into hip-hop. We started making hip- together and I think if we weren’t, we couldn’t work way we want to make it. Screw the expectations gonna grow in the future. If you look at people in hop as a hobby ‘cause we were mates, then in ‘93 we together as combination lyricists for so long. and everything’. You’re just focused on making the general, the music genres we get in to in our formed the Hilltop Hoods. We met DJ Debris later music and the lyrics and processing the beats. It was early-to-mid teenage years shape our tastes for the along the way and he helped us out for our EP in ’97. There was a long gap between The Calling and The definitely a lengthy process. We certainly put more rest of our lives. He basically became a part of the group when we Hard Road. Why was that? hours into making State of the Art than we did for dropped our first LP in 1999. Mainly due to the unexpected popularity on The any other album. We scraped a lot of tracks and made So what are your plans for the future? Calling, we ended up touring for a lot longer than an album that was a bit tougher, a bit rougher and Well we’re not looking at another album any time And then that was The planned. Not a lot of people a bit shorter: we didn’t want it to be bloated, we just soon. For now, we’re focusing on putting a new live Calling that kicked it all off. knew who we were where when came up with the tightest album we could. show together. We’re doing shows in the UK, then Yeah. The Calling we did we brought out The Calling and we come back here and do our national launch tour. in ‘03, which was a bit of a it sort of gained momentum. That was the birth of Golden Era Records, wasn’t it? Then we look at starting getting Golden Era going as breakthrough album for us. We started getting offered more What are your plans with that? a label and get some other acts with us. It was our third LP and was and more shows, which made the one that some people it difficult as we were trying to incorrectly recognise as our write The Hard Road. The same first. It was definitely our thing happened between The most successful. I guess that Hard Road and State of the Art. was a real sort of movement We had to say our booking agent for us. ‘no more’. We wanted to get back into the studio and get creative And that brought us ‘The again. Nosebleed Section’, which became almost an aussie And what has been the response anthem of the times. You internationally on the stuff that guys kind of skyrocketed Australia is producing? after that, didn’t you? Really positive, actually. We Yeah, well that was the track were getting reasonable sort that caused the calling album of numbers to our shows. We’ve to take off. Triple J started playing Nosebleed Section played a few shows and festivals in Germany, we and the popularity just grew from there. played Glastonbury Festival in England last year and we’re touring Canada next year. Germany, UK, So how does the song-writing in hip-hop? It’s Canada: we get a fair bit of response from them. naturally a different process to generic rock/pop I think the reason for that is that hip-hop is very music. strong in those territories. Most of the time when a song gets written the beat gets produced first. From there, myself and Suffer There was a lot of public pressure on The Hard will come up with a track and then go away and Road. Did you anticipate it being as big as it was? write lyrics together. One of us might come up with We almost had a philosophy that we wanted to make a verse, one with a chorus or sometimes we might hip-hop that we enjoy listening to and just hoped come up with something together. So the beat gets for the best. Then when we were asked to perform

24 Semper Floreat. The Last Goldfish. The Goldfish Issue. Semper Floreat. 25 Horoscopes Resident Psychic

Aries Taurus Gemini Cancer If you are considering With the internet Be decisive this There is a greater business dealings filter expanding, month and make the chance you will abroad, be wary of make haste in hard decisions. Like suffer a severe investing in China or downloading all whether to stay in a stroke or death this degree you hate which Iraq this lunar month. your legal Disney month, especially if is slowly sapping your Both have a history films before speeds soul or whether to you are over eighty of holding individuals on torrents are cut and suffer from without charge and have a Dare Espresso dramatically. severe strokes. restricting them from or Double Espresso legal counsel. with lunch.

Leo Virgo Libra Scorpio This month Semper Cruithne (Earth’s With Jupiter in This month is all has been subtly second moon) is alignment at this time about GFC penny- altered to provide drawing closer as the of year, the Lynx effect pinching. If you are a higher paper cut year progresses. This will be twice as strong addicted to Merlo’s will yield positive gains to page ratio than for you as usual. overpriced coffee, in your love life. That Semper recommends ever before. If you try and shift to the being said no one gives a double dose for ugly dislike the sight of a crap about Cruithne guys and nose pegs less good version at blood we apologise so advantages will be for self-respecting Mr. Bean’s. retrospectively. negligible. girls.

Sagittarius Capricorn Aquarius Pisces We’re not quite Your program is Aquarians should be Mature age students due for a complete aware that this month sure who ‘the will be particularly restructure this month. is “Improve Your Uni” pesky this month, man’ is but we do Be prepared as all month. If you see asking questions in anyone who is white, has believe you should the subjects you have lectures and calling dreadlocks and clearly stick it to him this completed have their lives with their parents, lecturers by their month. names changed and feel free to stone them to first name. If you the credit you earned death. The same applies experience difficulty dissolves into thin air. for anyone wearing a suit point out that you can to lectures. reproduce and use 26 Semper Floreat. The Goldfish Issue. computers.

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