Xavier University Exhibit

All Xavier Student Newspapers Xavier Student Newspapers

2008-04-30

Xavier University Newswire

Xavier University (Cincinnati, Ohio)

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This Book is brought to you for free and open access by the Xavier Student Newspapers at Exhibit. It has been accepted for inclusion in All Xavier Student Newspapers by an authorized administrator of Exhibit. For more information, please contact [email protected]. XAVIER NEWSWIRE week of April 30, 2008 the Year In Review Volume XCIII, Issue 29 Published since 1915 by the students of Xavier University www.xavier.edu/newswire The top stories of the year Patrick Stevenson, former The story: In the wake of an Newswire Editor-in-Chief apparent increase in alcohol policy and co-writer of “Xavier: enforcement The Musical” [Editor’s on campus, hysterical stu- note: despite what he dents make thinks, no one knows who the bizarre the hell he is] discusses assumption the top stories of the that Xavier 2007-08 year in a “Xavier: will become a dry campus The Musical” -themed in a matter of summary that is written in years. School the first person plural for administra- some reason. tors debunk this rumor, “Mommy had to watch how tant to college students. Important campaign regulations, which cre- West Virginia in the Sweet 16, the but acknowledge that policies are many grade B eggs and “X” enough that it is often a significant ates something of a brouhaha. Musketeers finally succumb to the being more strictly enforced this logo waffles she ate so she didn’t factor in a prospective student’s de- The three-and-a-half students who UCLA Bruins, a team with more year and will get stricter in years become a big fatty like your cision about where to go to school. actually voted in the SGA election NBA-level players than the Miami to come. No one seems nearly as father!” So if you get a great food service get upset. Heat. You might have heard about concerned about the illegal drug The story: With Sodexo’s (and provider, more students will want The lesson: In the future, don’t some of this. use at Xavier though. no, there’s no “h” in Sodexo any- to come to Xavier, which in turn break the rules in something as The lesson: Give Sean Miller The lesson: We get into the more, look it up) contract set to will bring in more tuition dollars, important as the SGA election. It’s a ten-year contract extension after whole “alcohol vs. weed” argument expire at the end of the semester, and therefore improve the school. not exactly a Jesuit ideal. every season. with stoners all the time (you know, Xavier opens up bidding for a new Explain to us again the advantage of the whole bit about how “alcohol food service provider. Students get settling for mediocre food service? “They’re the real reason “Wait, we need them alive so makes everything so intense and excited at the possibility that there Because it’s cheaper? That’s just why freshmen at Xavier come we can make them feel bad about weed just makes you chill-out”), might be good food on campus foolish in our opinion. apply.” their life choices so we can feel and we’re not about to get into one next year. However, none of the The story: The men’s basketball better about our own!” here. However, it’s interesting to food service providers Xavier is “If you ain’t been elected take team romps through non-confer- The story: Dorothy Day does a note that alcohol and marijuana considering serve food that could your dull butt home.” ence play. They cruise through bunch of great stuff for humanity. possession both carry the same fine be considered superior to Sodexo. The story: In one of the tighter A-10 play. They lose to St. Joseph’s We don’t know what exactly, but in Xavier’s residence halls. This Actually, it seems that there is an SGA executive elections in re- twice in 8 days. They rebound we assume most of it involves eat- strikes us as odd. excellent chance that Xavier will cent memory, the Craig Scanlon with wins over SEC champion ing Boca burgers. Hey, notice that renew Sodexo’s contract. ticket defeats the Esteban Gamboa Georgia and six-seeded Purdue. this year it didn’t pour on Relay for “What did I do?” The lesson: Food is really impor- ticket. The Scanlon ticket violated After a heart-stopping win over Life weekend for possibly the first The story: Two Xavier profes- time ever! sors in the Communication Arts The lesson: Dorothy Day people department sued Xavier Univer- take a lot of crap for being hippies sity for millions of dollars in dam- Putting the season in perspective and being vaguely condescending, ages for gender discrimination, but really, they’re doing good work. defamation and breach of contract, Doug Tifft If only all self-righteous student among other charges. As expected, Sports Editor organizations on campus could say Xavier has not responded to the the same… charges, which are rather scathing. The 2007-08 men’s basketball However, although the suit was season was arguably the best ever “They’re living first class in filed in December, no progress in Xavier’s history. The team won a the GSC.” has been made in the case, and if school record 30 games, an Atlantic The story: SGA gives their lead- it was, were sure neither of the par- 10 regular season title and advanced ers a raise. The Newswire reports ties would have told us about it. to the Elite Eight of the NCAA this. Certain members of SGA be- The lesson: Since the parties in Tournament. come, er, displeased. Do we really the case apparently are not going Xavier returned the starting have to rehash this? to talk to the press, we’d like them backcourt of Drew Lavender and The lesson: Okay, hypothetical to find alternative ways to say “no Stanley Burrell from a squad that question for you, dear reader: a comment” just to keep it interest- was seconds away from making media outlet accuses you of having ing. Try non-verbal responses, like a Sweet Sixteen appearance in bad public relations skills. Do you pretending you are a deaf-mute, or 2006-07. a) consider this point and attempt to breathing heavily into the phone The frontcourt for Xavier looked improve your public relations skills without saying anything. Let your solid as well, with senior Josh Dun- to better your relationship with the imagination run wild! can leading a group that included student body, or b) immediately YIR | pg. 2 athletic redshirt-sophomore Der- reject the idea that you have poor rick Brown and slashing forward public relations skills and proceed ©2008 C.J. Anderson, a new arrival from to antagonize the only major media The Xavier Newswire Manhattan College. non-BCS conference opponent that six game streak included an 80-65 outlet on campus? Sigh. We will All rights reserved The test for Xavier would be to tripped up the Musketeers early, as defeat of No. 8 Indiana to capture never—repeat, never—understand navigate an early series of out of Xavier fell at Miami (OH) 59-57 in the Chicago Invitational title, and a certain people. But then, we imag- conference opponents like Indiana, the first road game of the season. 64-59 nail-biter over Cincinnati to ine most people will never under- Cincinnati, Arizona State, Ten- The Musketeers quickly recov- take the Skyline Chili Crosstown stand us either. Fax (513) 745-2898 nessee, Kansas State, Auburn and ered, however, winning their next Shootout. Advertising (513) 745-3561 Virginia. However it would be a six games. The highlights of the “You drink in my hall you pay Circulation (513) 745-3130 GREATEST | pg. 3 a fine!” Editor-in-Chief (513) 745-3607 let justice be done even if the heavens should fall 2 Year in Review Campus news The Xavier Newswire Katie Rosenbaum, News Editor: 745-3607 [email protected] The Finer Things: 2007-2008 Not everything in the spring. During January, the center viding free phone alerts to students. hosted the 1,000 PeaceWomen More importantly, students can now 2007-2008 school exhibit, which displayed the faces be informed of the university’s year has been about of peace-building activists around snow days without having to look the world. out the window. scandals and lawsuits. Other areas of campus under- While these parts of campus Campus News takes went renovation. Students said were undergoing technological de- a look at some of the “goodbye” to Victory Perk and velopments, the administration was “hello” to the Coffee Emporium working on developments of the subtle, yet significant upon returning from Christmas “greener” sort. In January, Xavier stories on Xavier’s break. The year was also marked president Father Graham signed by the transformation of the first a commitment to work towards campus over the past floor of the McDonald library. eliminating Xavier’s greenhouse eight months. After a brief struggle with asbes- gas emissions. Plans of action Newswire Photo by Erika Breese tos, the first floor finally reopened, have been initiated, including the The library renovation was one of many changes on campus this year. Amy Windhorst new and improved, complete with formation of an overseeing com- The Best of Campus News Editor moving furniture and flat screen mittee. Tangible changes can be You may or may not realize it, televisions (also ridding itself of seen around campus. Students have but our campus has been changing. a questionably large number of already noted slight alterations, Police Notes The past two semesters at Xavier books). Meanwhile, the library and such as the new materials used in Sept. 15, 2:37 a.m.– A student Nov. 14, 7:05 p.m.– A student have been filled with memorable technology staff merged, marking the cafeteria and the recent addition reported that they were assaulted working for the Newswire reported events that have changed the way a step towards a high-tech Xavier of recycling bins in dorm rooms. and robbed at knifepoint on Wood- that someone had placed vulgar students live on our campus. campus. The renovation was one Graham hopes to reduce Xavier’s burn Ave. The suspects were de- inserts into newspapers in the Kuhl- First off, Residence Life began of the first steps towards the real- carbon footprint over time, stating scribed as three males, ages 17-23, man Hall lobby. the fall semester by imposing new ization of the proposed Learning that it is an important goal for a wearing black hoodies and jeans. fines on drinking games. Arguing Commons. Jesuit, Catholic community such Cincinnati Police were notified. Nov. 28, 9:37 a.m.– A Physi- that the games promote excessive The library was only one of as Xavier’s. cal Plant employee reported that drinking and could incur harmful many technological developments Budget shifts and pay raises Sept. 17, 3:01 a.m.– Campus earlier he or she had discovered a consequences, an additional $100 that marked the past two semes- were also seen around campus. Police assisted Norwood Police and non-student sleeping in the base- fine was added to the original $25 ters. SGA voting went online, New statewide legislation in Ohio federal officers in stopping a car for ment laundry room closet at 1019 for drinking underage. Whether or making campaign involvement raised the minimum wage to $7— questioning. The car contained 100 Dana Ave. Campus Police searched not the threat of punishment actu- more accessible to students. No many Xavier student employees pounds of marijuana and several the area and found that the subject ally lowered student participation more scantrons—students can now experienced a rise in their hourly suspects wanted in a drug inves- had already left the premises. It is in drinking games remains to be simply point and click their way to salary after the new base-wage went tigation. The suspects fled east on unclear how the subject got into seen. student-run democracy. into effect. Clarion Avenue. A canine track was the building. Xavier also welcomed another Campus safety was enhanced Xavier also saw a tuition in- unsuccessful in catching them. addition to campus: the Women’s this spring by the newly-installed crease of over previous semesters; Feb. 11, 8:44 a.m.– An em- Center on Dana Avenue. Initially All Card entry on all dormitories. the Xavier administration still felt Sept. 30, 4:06 a.m.– Officers ployee reported the theft of two providing coffee house hours and And who can forget the emergence confident that students and families responded to a complaint about a animal skulls from a display case occasional brown-bag lunches with of XU ALERT ME, created to aid could afford the bolstered price. subject causing a disturbance in in the Albers Hall lobby. guest speakers, the Women’s Center in student safety after the Virginia \The tuition bump had nothing to Brockman Hall. A 16-year-old non- became fully operational in the Tech shootings, it is a service pro- do with lack of interest, though— student from Miami University was March 29, 8:47 p.m.– Campus Xavier saw a record number of later identified. The disturbance Police, Cincinnati Police and Cin- freshman applicants for the 2008- was caused by the subject going cinnati Fire and Rescue responded 2009 school year. into an unlocked room looking for to a report of an individual lighting Amid these more serious con- a friend and then climbing into bed a couch on fire in the 1000 block cerns, there was still plenty of time with another student that they did of Dana Avenue after the men’s for entertainment (despite the lack not know. The minor was released basketball game. of SAC concerts). Actors Kal Penn to his or her parents and criminal and Nick Cannon arrived on cam- charges are pending. POLICE NOTE pus in March to promote Senator of the Barack Obama in the democratic Oct. 28, 2:57 a.m.– A student primaries. And the Blue Blob made dressed in all black was seen Year an appearance in two ESPN adver- pointing a toy gun into the air at tisements for college sports. the corner of Woodburn and Dana It was the best of times. It was Avenues. When asked about the Dec. 15, 1:54 a.m.- A non- the worst of times. And despite situation, the student said he was student walked into Flynn its ups and downs, the 2007-2008 in his Halloween costume. The Hall, the Campus Police student was warned about the dan- Newswire Photo by Erika Breese school year proved to be an eventful station, and was cited for Coffee Emporium replaced Victory Perk over Christmas break. one in Xavier’s campus history. gers of dressing like a suspect in a having an open container of known robbery and had the toy gun alcohol. ...YIR | cont. confiscated. liquor license as well, is expected to Mommy, was he like President preserve the Woods’ famous cherry Bush? wood bar, possibly in a new Xavier -Paid Advertisement- The story: College Republicans owned and operated bar. get conservative pundit Ann Coul- The lesson: Foolproof get rich ter to speak at Cintas. The event is quick plan: Own property near hyped extensively by local media Xavier. Sell property to Xavier at Check Us Out !! but ultimately passes without much ridiculously high markup. Enjoy www.homecityice.com fuss. Several student organizations newfound wealth. that Ms. Coulter, um, doesn’t sup- PERFECT SUMMER JOB! port, stage a successful fundraiser Now get off the stage and quit Hiring Students Part-Time (Now!) and Full-Time During in lieu of a protest. College Repub- ruining my script! Summer licans get their pictures taken with The story: The class of 2008 is Flexible Hours & GREAT PAY!! Ms. Coulter. Everyone’s happy. graduating from Xavier. The lesson: The best way to The lesson: Oh lord. We could We offer 10-40+ hours/week make your point is probably to get go off on a soliloquy about all the people to give you thousands of people that we’ve gotten to know, EARN UP TO $12.00 PLUS PER HOUR dollars. all the events that have happened to Newswire Photo by Erika Breese us, and all of the horrible life deci- Two Great Locations Just Minutes from When Mommy first got to Xavier bought the Norwood Cafe sions we’ve made over our college Campus!! Xavier, there was a paradise for in May. career here at Xavier. However, all students to go to and forget we think that anyone who actually Cinti./N.KY Forest Park their troubles vorite watering hole would finally cares about our college career (hi The story: After Xavier bought shut down. The bar remains open Mom!) has heard quite enough 513-941-0340 513-851-4040 the Norwood Café (a.k.a. the until September, when it very qui- about it over the past few weeks. So VISIT US ON THE WEB Woods) in May, speculation rages etly closes with minimal fanfare. farewell Xavier, it’s been real. as to when Charles Manson’s fa- Xavier, which snatched up the www.homecityice.com T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e SPORTS Year in Review 3 Volleyball full of firsts Women repeat in A-10 BRIEFS Ken burton Staff Writer Doug Tifft, Editor With a team of seven under- Sports Desk: 745-2878 classmen and two senior leaders, [email protected] including Jenni Horvath who spent much of the offseason recovering High finishes for from off-season surgery that re- swimming quired intensive rehab, there was some cause for concern entering the season for the Xavier Musketeer volleyball team. A seven-game win streak to begin the season, however, set the tone for what would be an incred- ible year. Led by seniors Horvath and Jill Quayle, the team finished Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com Sophomore forward Amber Harris was a first team All Atlantic 10 Con- 24-10 and reached the NCAA ference performer in 2007-08. tournament for the second time in program history and the first SCOTT MUELLER a big performance from Harris, as an at-large. Along the way, the Asst. Sports Editor along with strong outings from Musketeers were able to knock off The Xavier Women’s basketball Phillips and junior Jerri Taylor. The their first (No. 14 Cal Poly) and team had a very successful season, Musketeers were able to down the Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com later, their second (No. 12 Day- capturing the A-10 title and making Wolfpack 51-49. Senior Lindsay Jackson ton) ranked opponents in school it to the NCAA tournament as a nine Another highlight for the wom- history. seed. Overall the team finished 24- en’s team was the A-10 tournament The Xavier University men’s After reeling off nine consecu- 9, 11-3 in the A-10, putting them win. Coming in as the third seed, and women’s swim teams finished tive wins late in the season, the in third place, and giving them the Xavier was able to beat Temple in their respective seasons strong at Musketeers put themselves in posi- three seed in the A-10 tournament, the championship game, 47-42. The the A-10 Championship on Feb. tion for an appearance in the NCAA which they went on to win. win gave Xavier back-to-back A-10 24. The women finished in second tournament despite losing to Day- Xavier did, however, drop the tournament championships. Phil- place, earning their best ever fin- Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com ton in the A-10 championship. annual Crosstown Shootout to rival lips was named the tournament’s ish in the A-10. The men placed Senior Jill Quayle was the Atlantic In their first postseason matchup University of Cincinnati, 61-55, Most Outstanding Player, with third, their best performance in 10 Player of the Year. since 2001, the Musketeers faced a despite outstanding individual play. 10 points and 13 rebounds in the three years. team they had previously beat in the of the year as well. Sophomore Amber Harris had 16 championship game, giving her 18 In another first for the team, season, the 16th seeded Cal Poly Although the Musketeers would points and 13 rebounds, and fresh- double-doubles on the season. freshman Kari Peglar won the Mustangs. Although the Muske- have liked to advance in the tour- man T’Shia Phillips also chipped in The tournament gave Xavier women’s Most Outstanding Rookie teers were helped by many solid nament, the stellar individual and 16 points. Phillips went on to win an automatic berth into the NCAA Performer award. performances, the Mustangs pulled team play over the course of the her third consecutive A-10 Rookie tournament where, as the No. 9 Many new school marks were away late in each of the three games season helped solidify this team of the Week award following the seed, they would have to face No. established at the meet, most no- and completed the sweep. as arguably the best in school his- Shootout. 8 Nebraska in the first round. tably by junior Pat McGrath in Quayle was named the A-10 tory. At the Crosstown Shootout, Despite a late intense rally from the 1000 and 1650 meter freestyle Player of the Year and was named It was truly a remarkable run Xavier set a new record for atten- the Musketeers, the Cornhuskers events. a 2007 Division I Honorable Men- that featured many “firsts” for a dance, selling all 10,250 seats at were able to knock out Xavier in The women secured second tion All-America by the American program that is on the rise. Cintas Center. The previous record the first round 61-58. place overall with a new school Volleyball Coaches Association Deaton, newly acquired as- had been 6,802 for an NCAA tour- With no graduating seniors on record in the 400 meter freestyle (AVCA). Horvath and sophomore sistant Christy Utnage and rising nament game against Louisville. the team, the future of women’s relay. Hillary Otte were named to the seniors Jenn Welsh and Megan Xavier was able to follow up the basketball at Xavier looks bright: Senior Matt Krouse and sopho- All-Tournament team for their Hellmann will look to lead the loss to Cincinnati by knocking off “It’s certainly exciting to think more Martha Cutter-Wilson earned performances in the Atlantic 10 Musketeers and build on the es- nationally ranked North Carolina about the possibilities of having spots on the A-10 Academic All- tournament. Coach Floyd Deaton tablished momentum heading into State. Visiting the No. 24 ranked everybody back, “ said head coach Conference Team. was named the Atlantic 10 coach next season. Wolfpack, Xavier once again got Kevin McGuff. XC performs well Greatest season in Xavier history? at NCAA regional BASKETBALL | cont. from B.J. Raymond led Xavier to its second Elite Eight appearance After a tough road loss in which in school history. Xavier shot 31 percent against Ari- Similar to the first time that zona State’s zone, the Musketeers Xavier reached an Elite Eight in returned to Cintas Center to take on 2004, the Musketeers met a top No. 12 Tennessee. The Volunteers seeded team, UCLA Bruins, and utilized a 13-2 run over the final star freshman Kevin Love. 4:17 of the game to come away with In a high pressure, high intensity an 82-75 defeat of the Musketeers. game Xavier seemed to come out This proved to be Xavier’s only tight, squandering chances to take home floor loss of the season. control of the game on easy layups, Led by the senior trio of Lav- and going an uncharacteristic 0-3 ender, Burrell and Duncan the from the foul line in the first half. Musketeers would recover, winning The second half was not much Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com their next six games by an average better for the Musketeers, as UCLA Senior Ben Milroy of 24 points. A blowout 78-59 road maintained a double-digit lead loss to Temple on January 16 left throughout and advanced to the At the NCAA Great Lakes the 20th ranked Musketeers at a Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com Final Four by a score of 76-57. regional on Nov. 10 the Xavier crossroads of the season. It was the Senior guard Stanley Burrell was the Atlantic 10 Defensive Player of the Despite the loss, coach Sean University cross country teams seniors who came through again as Year, as well as a third team All Conference selection. Miller still had positive reflections wrapped up their seasons with Duncan and Burrell both scored 14 third time of the season 74-65 in the half. Much like the first game the on the season, “I’m so proud of the excellent performances. points in a 74-66 road victory over first round, but fell to Saint Joseph’s Musketeers recovered, and this team that we had. To win 30 games, The women’s team took 18th George Washington. for the second time eight days. time led by a 26-33 performance to be in the Elite Eight, to watch our place as a team in a field of 30, the Xavier carried that momentum Despite the loss, No. 12 Xavier at the free throw line, defeating the three seniors do it time and time best finish in school history, and the over the next 10 games, defeating still was able to receive a three seed Boilermakers 85-78. again, to do it as a team...” men’s team took 21st, their third opponents by 10 points per game. in the NCAA Tournament, where As Xavier advanced to the “It ended probably where it best finish ever. Lavender rolled his ankle in a 62- they would face SEC Champion Sweet Sixteen they were faced with should have…when you can say Leading the way for the wom- 60 win at Charlotte on Feb. 13, Georgia in the first round in Wash- a familiar opponent on the oppos- that, you can walk away with your en’s team was freshman Christina and was significantly restricted ington, D.C. After a slow start, ing sidelines in West Virginia coach head held high, hoping that this, like Schneider, who finished in 28th throughout the rest of the regular Xavier outscored the Bulldogs 47- Bob Huggins, who coached at Cin- the last time we were here, estab- place overall. Schneider marked season. 26 to earn a 73-61 win and a date cinnati from 1989 to 2005. His 10th lishes a bar for the future.” the best finish by a Musketeer since After cutting down the nets to with sixth seeded Purdue in the seeded Mountaineer squad, led by Despite lucrative offers from 2001. celebrate the regular season A-10 second round. athletic forward Joe Alexander, other schools, Miller agreed to a 10 For the men senior Ben Milroy title after defeating Richmond, The second game of the tourna- took Xavier into overtime before year contract extension with Xavier finished highest, placing 82nd it was off to Atlantic City for the ment started much like the first for falling to the Musketeers 79-75. after the season, showing the level overall. Milroy was named to the Atlantic 10 Championship. Xavier the Musketeers, as they fell behind Josh Duncan’s career-high 26 of commitment that the university Atlantic 10 Academic All-Confer- polished off rival Dayton for the 18-10 with 11:41 to play in the first points, and two clutch 3-point shots and Miller share. ence Team. 4 YEAR IN REVIEW final reflections T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e Staff Talk: I WISH I HAD...

...well-paying worker’s comp. if ...gotten the same reaction to a ...my thousand dollars back ...never had that last birthday ...a new car. Wait, I don’t want the ceiling ever caves in. haircut as Paul Moeller. from my trip to Phoenix. That shot of 151. My roommate to say that, but I really do. would be nice. wishes that, too. Katthryn Rosenbaum Andrew Chestnut Meghan Berneking Doug Tifft Emily Hoferer

...reacted to “P.S. I Love You” ...NOT sent my conservative ...realized sooner that, contrary ...a DR Rapid-Feed 30.00 com- ...been Patrick Stevenson so no in the typical female fashion. parents “The 40-Year-Old to my belief, Subway does not mercial wood-chipper. And a one would know who I am. Maybe then I would not have Virgin” on an irrational eBay constitute its own food group. sweater vest. been dubbed “The Ice-Queen.” impulse buy, only to receive an 12 days straight and counting, Monica Laco email the following day ques- baby! Amy Windhorst Kate Phillips tioning my self-worth. Sarah Wieten Madeline LaFave

Finger’s final farewell ...played Birdman. Well Xavier, another school year Burns from Mission and Identity, bly thank my professors, especially is coming to a close. All of us se- who makes fun of me every chance the ones I still have for class. John Katherine Monasterio niors are being lazy—the norm. So, he gets. Verwiel—I have to thank you. Just what is there to say? I mean, I’m go- If I really wanted to be the big- for being you. As a matter of fact, ing to be leaving soon, much to the ger man I could apologize to all I need to thank everyone in ROTC, dismay of everyone I am sure. How the people I’ve offended. Like the just because you guys are so pretty does one end a college career? Dorothy Day House and Shanty (Oh, so pretty?). I could look back and think of Town, groups of people who will Thank you, America. all the good times I’ve had. Like probably never realize that I actu- Also, I have to thank Gypsies. living in Husman and getting to ally respect and admire almost all All of them. Everywhere. know my suitemates, and eating the work they do, even if they don’t And thank you, Newswire, for all of their cheese when no one was have any sense of humor at all. And giving me a space to put this crap ...as much anonymnity in the room. Sorry, Ryan and my buddies at the Muskie, for the last two years. Well, that as Patrick Stevenson. Zach. Everyone can relate who I really think do and for being the greatest, friendli- to that, right? a pretty good job. est, most supportive and gosh darn John LaFollette Or that one time And Catholics. I prettiest group of people that have New Editor-in-Chief we went to the Elite am sorry, Catho- ever loafed across this planet. Eight. Totally sweet, lics. Thank you Dana Gardens, from even if it was lack- I am sorry the bottom of my liver. Same to ing one Mr. Will to my readers. I you, Ryan’s Pub. PUB PUB PUB Caudle and his baby think there may IT’S A FREAKING PUB. skyhook. be one out there. I am not thanking you, Campus Oh and there was that And I apologize. Police. Not because I don’t ap- one time I wore a chicken Really. preciate you—I do—but because suit to finals. I completely O f c o u r s e you have stolen millions of dollars recommend that. No one ever there are people from me with your little pink pieces ...about five more inches. sees it coming. Classic. I should probably of paper. On the other hand I could thank too. Jesus, hol- Finally, I just want to say thank Darren LaCour reflect on all the won- matt ler back. My you to my fiancée, Lauren Staley. derfully religious people finger roommates— Love you, boo. I’ve had the opportunity to meet. you guys rock. But not you Mike, Oh, and everyone who just sat There’s Fr. LaRocca, who has lit- you’re not any fun. I have to thank through 500 words of inside jokes. erally cooked millions of pounds Dave’s sister, for all those wonder- Way to tough it out Xavier. Have a of pasta for me. And crazy Brother ful times together. I should proba- great summer. The many, MANY mugshots of Darren LaCour: a non-chronological progression of a man absorbed with greatness “Musical” and more... Miller’s new deal Five performances. Three hours. One fine Men’s basketball coach Sean Miller was rewarded night in the GSC Theatre. Felipe Garcia handsomely for the Musketeers’ return to the Elite reviews “Workshop.” Page 3 Eight this year, his second deal in two years. Page 4

week of XAVIER NEWSWIRE April 30, 2008 Volume XCIV, Issue 29 Published since 1915 by the students of Xavier University www.xavier.edu/newswire Cincinnati Pops director headlining commencement Kelly Shaw Senior News Writer Commencement Award Recipients: Maestro Erich Kunzel, director Magis Award recognizing a grad who has acheived excellence and has embodied Jesuit ideals: of the Cincinnati Pops Orchestra, Jay Gutzwiller (for work in Nicaragua, El Salvador and Peru) will be the commencement speaker for the graduating class of 2008. Paul O’Connor Leadership Award: Jim Brockhoff (mens’ and womens’ tennis coach) A mainstay of the Cincinnati music scene, Kunzel has directed Distinguished Alumnus Award: Phil Gasiewicz the Cincinnati Pops for 30 years, has conducted 10 concerts in Carn- Leadership Medallion: Rev. Howard J. Gray, S.J. egie Hall, won a Grammy Award (to be awarded at the graduate commencement ceremony) in 1997 and received the National Medal of Arts from President Bush regard,” said Kunzel. believes, “you cannot have any real in 2006. In addition to his professional ‘career’ without a college degree.” Kunzel was chosen for his local repertoire, Kunzel is also notable As with previous commence- and global reputation. for his contribution to the city as ment speakers like Cokie Roberts, “He was picked specifically the Chairman of the Greater Cincin- Scott Simon and A.G. Lafley, for his contribution to music, arts nati Arts and Education Center, an among others, Kunzel will be and culture…and in recognition of organization with which he plans presented with an honorary Xavier his outstanding reputation in the build a school for the creative and degree. arts and his work to create music performing arts. Other awards presented at the around the world,” said Pat Woeste, He is not yet sure on what his ceremony will include the Magis Executive Director for Provost address will focus, but he said that Award for alumni excellence and Operations. he “always tries to give students service and the Paul O’Connor “I think students will appreciate the idea to find [their] place in life,” Leadership Award. him,” Woeste said. and instructs students to “excel in The student who will be speak- “I am honored to be asked by what you choose and give back to ing with Kunzel at this year’s Xavier University and feel it is my the community.” commencement ceremony will duty as conductor of the Cincin- After studying at Dartmouth be named the John A. Elliot, S.J. Photo Courtesy Mark Lyons Erich Kunzel, Xavier’s 2008 commencement speaker, has conducted nati Pops to have a presence in the as an undergraduate and at Brown Scholar, a change from the more the Cincinnati Pops since 1977. community, which requests in this for his master’s degree, Kunzel traditional “valedictorian” title.

Xavier pleased with Pope’s position SGA to firm community ties parish.” Kathryn RosenBaum only for Senate members but for the “Theology courses, however, News Editor larger Xavier community. like other courses in the university, After evaluating its mandate, the McShane is going to focus his press students to think critically: Student Government Association’s efforts on the relationship between learning the skills and disciplines Community Affairs Committee is the Community Affairs Committee of thinking theologically, under- seeking to establish a lasting re- and the CBI, he said. standing religious and historical lationship between Xavier and its “The CBI has a staff and re- texts within their own contexts surrounding community. sources that we can utilize to build a and with attention to the history Two areas of focus for the com- relationship with [area] residents,” of interpretation, thinking through mittee are service and building said McShane. the ethical implications of doctrines the relationship between SGA and McShane will meet this summer and various church teachings,” the Community Building Institute with the Senior Associate of Com- Giblin said. (CBI), which is designed to help munity Engagement at the CBI, By- Quinn said that an important engage residents and build relation- ron White, to discuss what Xavier part of thinking critically about ships between the university and its can be doing to further develop something is knowing it well neighbors. and maintain lasting relationships enough to analyze and critique it, a The Chair of the Community with the community, which are par- photo courtesy http://info.detnews.com responsibility that often comes with Affairs Committee, sophomore ticularly important given Xavier’s Pope Benedict XVI spoke recently in the United States. pre-college Catholic catechesis. He James McShane, said he “wants planned expansion. some of the most well-known also said that such education often Darren Lacour the committee to be a major part of McShane has consulted with Catholic universities.” seems ineffective and worthless, as Op-Ed Editor [Xavier’s surrounding] community Boyd, who was a member of the In his April 17 address to “not Many critics expected the Pope the teachers are not true experts at and really be able to get things done Community Affairs Committee just college presidents, but Catholic to call out Catholic educators for the pre-college level. both next year and in the future.” for 2007-08, as well as with SGA educators more broadly,” as Dr. failing in this task, but such criti- “Theology isn’t catechism any The goal of the Community President junior Craig Scanlon, Marie Giblin of the Theology De- cism was not found in his speech. more,” said Quinn, “but in order to Affairs Committee this year is to who headed the committee in 2006- partment put it, Pope Benedict XVI “Benedict seems to get Ameri- be truly diverse, the official position establish programs that last be- 07, to see what initiatives and goals called teachers and administrators cans,” said Dr. Timothy Quinn, of the Church must be part of the yond the upcoming Senate term, have been successful in the past. “to ensure that students receive a professor in the department of discussions.” McShane said. The Community Affairs Com- instruction in Catholic doctrine and philosophy. Giblin feels that the Theology Currently, the SGA constitution mittee is also considering rees- practice.” Quinn says that the new pontiff department at Xavier does a good is vague regarding the Community tablishing its relationship with Dr. This last point has been some- has a more accurate and understand- job of keeping that dialogue active Affairs Committee. John Kucia, administrative vice thing of a concern to many conser- ing view of United States liberal and fruitful. As a result, she doesn’t It does, however, call for all president of Xavier, said Senate vative Catholic groups. democracy than his predecessor, foresee any changes occurring at Senate members to complete at Coordinator Esteban Gamboa. Recently, for example, the Car- John Paul II, may have had. Xavier in response to the Pope’s least five to seven hours of service Among Kucia’s responsibilities dinal Newman Society released “Particularly at the college and address. throughout the year. are Xavier’s community relations. “The Newman Guide to Choos- university level, it is not the job of Students seeking catechesis at One of the projects that Commit- Kucia has spoken at Xavier Sen- ing a Catholic College,” in order the teachers to simply give religious Xavier may still find frustrations, tee member freshman Allen Boyd ate meetings in the past, and has to “show students where they instruction,” said Giblin. but Giblin says that “any student will be taking on as his Senate also served as a liaison between the can learn and grow in a genuine “That is catechesis and cateche- who feels this way should come project will be working to establish Community Affairs Committee and Catholic environment without the sis takes place under the umbrella and speak with the chair of the a community service project not White at the CBI. nonsense that has overtaken even of campus ministry and Bellarmine department.” Fiat Justitia, Ruat Coelum 2 week of april 30, 2008 Opinions & Editorials T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e The Xavier University Drama: Not just for the Players Just when I thought I was healed Promise yourself you won’t, and confidence in you by respecting Newswire of my sinusitis, another problem is you’ll avoid saying things you their privacy. If nobody asked for Copyright 2008 Circulation 3,000 making me edgier than ever: social regret. Let other people do that privacy, that’s no excuse to blab. Editor-in-Chief & Publisher John LaFollette drama. instead. Obviously this does not include Managing Editor Emily Hoferer Every time I turn around, some- 2. Be rational. Yes, somebody infractions that violate laws, moral Mng. Editor for Special Projects Kelly Shaw body can’t let an issue go. Some- may have angered you. A lot. But codes, or other standards we live Business Manager David Cranston body is making a huge fuss over what if that somebody actually has by. But if a friend trusts you with Advertising Manager Ellie Jaqueth a small infraction. Somebody is a valid concern? Consider where he information, don’t betray them. Classifieds Manager James Cave indignant for no good reason. or she is coming from. Maybe he’s Keep their secret—and if you know Ad Sales Manager Chelsey Alexander RELAX, XAVIER. stressed. Maybe she’s actually be- you won’t be able to, ask them to Distribution Manager Skip Young We all need to take some deep ing rational. Maybe he really does confide in someone else. Adviser Patrick Larkin breaths and step back from our have a relevant idea. Let’s give 5. Don’t be rude to others, Op-Ed Editor: darren lacour situations. We need to see it all people a chance without getting even if you think some- Assistant Op-Ed Editor: katherine monasterio with fresh eyes, or talk it over with defensive. Let’s hear them body really deserves it. Online & Design Editor: andrew chestnut out—and then they’ll be Calling people names, Photo Editor: erika bresee friends who won’t B.S. us. Head Copy Editor: madeline lafave Granted, there are some in- more willing to listen to calling unnecessary Copy Editors: rebecca conrad, monica laco, kate phillips, sarah wieten stances in which a person should us when it’s our turn. attention to a situa- be absolutely incensed about his or 3. If you have a prob- tion—all of that just - s t a f f e d i t o r i a l s - her situation. Failing out of Xavier lem with somebody, tell sets everyone a-cringe is one. Having just dumped a cheat- that person. And refer and puts everybody ing idiot is another. Still another is to tips #1 and #2. Don’t in an uncomfortable A few parting realizing that you missed BLT day let your discussion (not position. (See #3.) at the caf one afternoon. But there argument!) elevate into Not all types of thoughts are very few situations that cannot shouting. If you can’t katherine social drama can So, we thought about making some juvenile remarks about the fire drill be resolved if we all just swallow reach an agreement, monasterio be covered or even in Alter, such as “What are we, in high school?” our pride and realize that what agree to disagree for amended, but this should We thought about commending the caf for finally getting biodegradable we’re fussing about is not worth the the moment and return to the topic help us to get through exam week to-go boxes to replace the extremely environmentally-hostile styrofoam angst we’re devoting to it. later—or drop it altogether, if nec- at least somewhat peacefully. Just containers students have been protesting for quite a while. So, in honor of exam week, essary. We ladies are particularly remember above all to take time for We thought about asking why the commencement speaker, though where tensions are running high good at putting on a sweet façade yourself. Odds are, if we’re caus- perhaps an intriguing individual, isn’t someone we’ve heard of before or and drama is sure to abound, I have while talking viciously behind each ing, reacting to, or enforcing drama, someone who would immediately catch our attention. some tips that may provide a bit of other’s backs. Let’s not do that it’s because we’re stressed about We thought about telling you to use NOTthebookstore.com for your repose from these situations. this time. Let’s have the courage something beyond the situation at textbooks in the fall. 1. Keep a level head. This is to actually approach one another hand. So take the extra time—yes, We thought about giving props to SAC for not, as many assumed, easier said than done, but you can truthfully. even during exams—to take a walk spending all the unused concert money on the “Spring into Summer” learn to recognize drama when 4. Don’t spread the drama. outside. Or to curl up on the sofa events and instead rolling over those funds for next year. you see it. Notice when people are Don’t make awkward statuses on with your comforter and some aw- We thought about bringing up one more time, for old time’s sake, the getting hysterical—or when you’re Facebook. Don’t shout it in the Caf. ful reality TV. Whatever you do, pathetic events surrounding the Manresa issue and Res Life’s over-the- getting hysterical. Are people rais- Don’t pass it among your friends. let’s relax, Xavier, and make sure top reaction. ing their voices? Becoming defen- If somebody asks you specifi- that we go out with an academic But, we decided not to. sive? Getting squeakier, perhaps? cally not to tell others, honor their (not social) bang. We decided to tell you all to have a wonderful, safe summer. It’s been a heck of a year, so be sure to save the Year in Review issue as a pseudo- — L E T T E R S T O T H E E D I T O R — yearbook for all your wonderful ’07-’08 memories. Connections Bellarmine: Church or Concert Hall? One of the most important les- As a senior at Xavier, I believe eat away at my patience and I real- sons I have learned at Xavier is there is one thing that does not click ized that I was by no means the only Unique summer fun that everything is connected. I am with the Xavier mission of “engag- student on campus who shared this Ah, summer! What freedom! What brilliance! How many glorious confident that the consequences of ing and forming students intellectu- frustration. When my parents and chances to make money have we! Some of us are still working on that my actions inevitably affect more ally, morally and spiritually, with I decided to invest $128,000 into one, but still! Summer! than just myself. rigor and compassion, toward lives Xavier for my education, a part of However, at some point,everyone must have experienced a certain I have recently become aware of solidarity, service and success”: that decision was based on Xavier’s small, nagging thought in the back of their mind. Maybe once. Maybe lots of the connection between myself the spiritual formation of students. affiliation with Catholicism. I put of times. Maybe just on the weekends. We can’t believe we’re thinking and injustice in a small strip of con- I seriously question the use of my hope and trust in this institu- it, but we’re bored. tested land known as Israel and/or Bellarmine Chapel as a means to tion to provide the means to grow No matter what we do, we simply can’t become motivated enough to Palestine. No, I am not directly spiritual formation. in my Catholic faith, to be “formed pick up that novel, John Deere the yard or finish some project we’ve been contributing to increasing violence During my first year at Xavier, spiritually.” But this is simply a working on. Look no farther, friends, for here are some unique ideas to between Israelis and Palestinians, as I was acclimating to an intense false promise and even false ad- experience summer to the fullest. but I am connected to many fac- atmosphere of study, a social life, vertising if Catholic students on Explore! Think you know your city? Or, if you’re not a suburbanite, tors that perpetuate the on-going and personal development, I found this campus cannot be guaranteed think you know the back woods of your property? Go exploring! Drive violence. One of those factors is it helpful to visit the chapel in hopes a space where they can find silence around or walk; bring friends and a map and discover the parts of your the Caterpillar company. of sitting with God in silence and that is conducive to reflection and city or area you never knew existed. Maybe there are all kinds of cool This U.S. company produces working out all that was happening prayer. The spaces designated as museums you never knew about. Maybe in those woods, there’s a path construction and destruction ma- around and inside of me. I especial- chapels in the dorms do not meet you haven’t seen since you were little. Rediscover. chines and prides itself on “doing ly desired to spend time in the side this standard, as they do not have Take up a cool hobby. I’m not talking about model cars or quilting. well by ‘doing good’ all around chapel of Bellarmine where one can the Blessed Sacrament reserved and I’m talking about stargazing, going out in the backyard with friends and the world” (Jim Owens, Caterpillar find the Blessed Sacrament. I as- are frequently used by students for a blanket and plotting your way to Jupiter. I’m talking about making a CEO). However, I don’t think he sumed that since it is the only place study and group meetings. big college student recipe book for when you’ve finally got your own would consider his company “do- on campus that has the Blessed My student tour described Bel- kitchen. I’m talking about learning the intricacies of your car’s engine. ing good” by owning the machines Sacrament reserved, it would be larmine as the place of worship for Maybe next time you can change your own oil. that destroy Palestinian homes and a very accessible place, respected students. Instead, our tour guide Do something for somebody else. Mother’s and Father’s Day are com- farms by bulldozing them without with worship and silence. should have described this space as ing up, so rather than the usual flowers or necktie, put together a scrapbook right or warning, or by owning the Unfortunately, silence was not the most frequented rehearsal cen- (not a photo album, you boring fool, you) of you and your ‘rents. From tool of Israel’s separation wall that what I experienced as I began to ter on campus. My investment in when you were little and bigger and pictures of you both together. It will was declared illegal by the Interna- frequent the side chapel. More often this university as a Catholic student make them cry. Happily. Or send a letter (a real letter, not an email) to a tional Court of Justice of the UN. than not, I could usually find a re- did not come through. Xavier has friend from school. When I see Caterpillar products hearsal of some sort, ranging from only made it increasingly difficult There are so many ways to have fun outside of work and boredom dur- on Xavier’s campus, I cannot help voice lessons, to choir practice, and for Catholic students to be “formed ing the summer. These are merely a few ideas to get you started. Enjoy, but make the connection between even musical instruments. I figured spiritually.” be safe, and above all, savor it. We’ll miss it in the fall. myself, Xavier, Caterpillar, Israelis that there must have not been any I heard that the new SGA ex- and Palestinians. Something can be other space on campus to hold these ecutives, as part of their platform, On the Web: http://www.xavier.edu/newswire done: we can urge ourselves and our weekly events. But I soon realized introduced the idea of constructing The Xavier Newswire is published weekly statements and opinions of a columnist do not nec- school to examine its investments, that Xavier has a wonderful facil- an interfaith prayer facility on cam- throughout the school year, except during vaca- essarily reflect those of editors or general staff. pus. I wonder if there will be any tion and final exams, by the students of Xavier Subscription rates are $30 per year or $15 per and consider not using Caterpillar. ity a few buildings down from the University, 3800 Victory Parkway, Cincinnati, OH semester within the USA and are prorated. Consider this issue a launch pad chapel that is dedicated specifically room for Catholic students in this 45207-2129. Subscription inquiries should be directed to facility because, at the moment, we The staff editorial is written by a different staff Patrick Stevenson, 513-745-3607. for your personal investigations by to these musical endeavors: Edge- member each week and does not necessarily reflect Advertising inquiries should be directed to Ellie learning more at www.electronicin- cliff Hall. I visited this building and too seem to be lacking an adequate the sentiments of the entire staff. It is also not the Jaqueth, Advertising Manager, 513-745-3561. space for silence and reflection on sole responsibility of the Opinions and Editorials One copy of the Xavier Newswire, distributed tifada.net (click on “By Topic” and found a facility with enough space editor to write it. on campus, is free per person per week. Additional then choose “Caterpillar”). to have choir practice and with campus. The statements and opinions of the Xavier copies are 25 cents. Newswire are not necessarily those of the student Xavier University is an academic community plenty of pianos. body, faculty or administration of Xavier. The committed to equal opportunity for all persons. Julia Alexander | ‘08 The noise in Bellarmine began to Jason Hage | ‘08 T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e Arts & Entertainment week of April 30, 2008 3 “Workshop” wows Xavier Players go BRIEFS Stephanie Metz, Editor Felipe Garcia “As the Tire Swing Turns,” a Arts & Entertainment Desk: Staff Writer soap opera within a kindergarten 745-2878 The Xavier Players’ “Workshop class, showcased senior Briana Madcap next year [email protected] 2008,” saved the best for last. The Hanson’s writing skills. Driven by Nora Heink residency at the university will first act of the Xavier Players’ pro- solid acting and directing, the play Asst. Arts & Entertainment Editor ex pand students’ opportunities to duction consisted of four comedic was hilarious. Hanson stole her own Xavier’s Department of Per- explore theatrical arts. Music Festival pieces created entirely by Xavier show, embodying the eccentric and forming Arts recently announced it A Cincinnati-based children’s students, while the second act fea- evil kindergartner Maggie. At 7 p.m. on Wednesday, April 30, will be collaborating with Madcap theatre group, Madcap tours tured “Xavier: the Musical.” “The Olive Garden,” written Diane Campbell’s dance classes Productions’ Puppet Theatre to throughout the Midwest and annu- Minutes after the curtains by Nick Rosati and Ray O’Brien, will perform dances ranging from bring theater for young audiences ally reaches over 460,000 children opened and the first piece, “Good displayed a dysfunctional family hip-hop to “Sever Brides from to Xavier. with performances in schools, Cop, Bad Cop,” illuminated the with parents, played excellently by Next fall, Madcap will establish theatres and community centers. Seven Brothers” in the GSC The- stage, the towering figure of junior seniors Rosie Swan and Michael a residency which will include Madcap artists also build the nec- atre. The Student Brass Ensemble Connor Lynch bellowed onstage, Roberts, who made each character’s workshops, performance opportu- esary puppets for each production. dominating life miserable. will follow with a musical per- nities and master classes on puppet Madcap’s residency at Xavier the scene. Laughs and formance. The Xavier University techniques and children’s theatre. will include technical studies in the As tough cries of shock Women’s Chorus will open Friday “Students will work with a profes- time-honored art of puppeteering. cop Shane and disgust evening’s performance with an sional theatre company, strive for This craft involves a special set of S c h i l - flew while Ca- artistic excellence and present their dramatic skills and relies particu- international program of choral ler, Lynch nadian slurs work in a public performance,” larly upon precise movements in music. Sasha Hart’s ballet students proved con- were thrown said Christine Arnison, Madcap’s order to convey a character’s emo- vincing in about onstage. will take the stage next. Finally, managing director. tions to the audience. stature if not Though wildly the performance will end with se- Xavier currently offers a minor Madcap acknowledges and demeanor. funny, “The lected spirituals performed by the in performance studies that devel- promotes using puppets to present Though at Olive Garden” Edgecliff Vocal Ensemble. The ops students’ skills in all aspects of educational messages to young t i m e s h e lacked a proper Newswire photo by erika bresee stage performance. Madcap’s theatergoers. As part of Xavier’s evening begins at 7:30 p.m. Friday, s t u m b l e d Senior Katie Greene ending as Swan cooperation with the company, May 2, in the GSC Theatre. Tickets over the script, Lynch’s physique and Roberts stormed away from the students will tour Cincinnati and retained the audience’s attention. wreckage. for both events are $2 for students its surrounding areas next spring Lynch’s control of the stage drew In “Xavier: the Musical” Seniors and $5 for others. with a show entitled “Healthy attention away from costar junior Patrick Stevenson and Hanson, The Habits.” Madcap also plans to work Becky Hoerr at times. Newswire’s own ex-Editor in Chief with Xavier students on a holiday Senior Ray O’Brien’s writing and former Calendar City writer, production called “Tales from My managed to pull out laughs here respectively, created a musical “Carmina Burana” Aunt’s Attic.” and there. A satire of the game farce that parodied life at Xavier. Xavier’s concert choir will per- “Not only will our students de- Clue drew the greatest audience The piece proved the community form selections from Carl Orff’s velop opportunities to work in all response. has a sense of humor about itself “Carmina Burana” at the Cincinnat aspects of theatrical productions, The second piece, “Whatever as the entire audience was left in they will be given another method Ballet. Performances are 8 p.m. It’s About,” was written by sopho- stitches. The piece mocked every- of learning which can be applied to Friday, May 9 through Saturday, more Alex Craven and and played thing from the massive muscles of their individual courses of study,” itself out entirely in the dark. The Father Graham to the lack of SAC May 10 with performances at 2 said Dr. Mark Meyers of Xavier’s highlight of this piece was by the activities this year. A solid work p.m. on Saturday, May 10 and Sun- College of Social Sciences, Health intrigue and depth of sophomore of humor in its entirety, “Xavier day, May 11 at the Aronoff center and Education. Stuart McNiell’s voice and the the Musical” served as a perfect downtown. playfulness of fellow actor junior bookend for the year. photo courtesy madcappuppets.com Hannah Balash. One of the Madcap puppets. Classifieds For classified orders and information, call James Cave at513-745-3561 or email him at [email protected] Annual “Tootsie Roll Sculpture Contest”. Xavier PRSSA has chal- Houses still available for 2008 school year. All Help Wanted lenged the reigning champions, XUSOTA, to make the best sculpture with air conditioning, free laundry and park- ing. Call Matt (513) 587-9884 or [email protected] Convenient and affordable: Studio apartment in a 3 family. All utili- using Tootsie Rolls! Come cheer on your favorite team and join in the Large Two Bedroom Apartment with bonus room. Free heat & ties included. Equipped. Great location at an affordable $335 per “Walk-n-Roll to cure Spinal Muscular Atrophy” at the Cintas Center. water included. Two blocks to campus. Off street parking and month. Large one bedroom apartment in a 3 family. Equipped. Heat Saturday, April 26 -- 9:00 a.m. Tootsie Roll Contest and 5K Walk. laundry on site. $590 per month. Must see, call (513) 673-4946 and hot water included. $395 per month. Please call 922-7173. $10 registration includes tee shirt, refreshments, and Tootsie Rolls! Look for 3 roomates to rent the best apartment we have seen TWO MEN AND A TRUCK needs summer help. Hiring Drivers and in the Xavier market. This apartment has everything you could Movers that are hardworking, honest and dependable. Great pay want! Wood paneled walls, Close to Xavier, Large kit., extremely 2008 Summer Opportunity. Professional couple in a north- and Great tips. Must work well on a team. Drug Free Workplace. large private bdrms, party rooms, large deck, it’s amazing! Rent is ern Cincinnati suburb is looking for a fun, dependable and flex- Beat the rush -- apply now! Call 513-245-1900 or 513-459-8080. $360 per person! Call Nick if you are interested! 330-317-1728 ible person to help out over summer break. Help needed to transport 2 teenage kids to and from activities and monitoring Babysitter needed. Begin around May 10, coninue thru Au- Great Housing still availabe for 2008 school year. whereabouts. Must have your own car and have excellent driv- gust. Approximately 20 to 25 hours per week for 4 year old All with air conditioning, free laundry and park- ing record. Hours may vary depending on activities; about 30 boy in Hyde Park. Must have own car. Call Ann 484-4092. ing. Call Matt (513) 587-9884 or [email protected]. hours/week. The right person will receive very good pay! Refer- Energetic, fun person to watch & escort 2 kids(7 & 11 Three Bedroom apartment in secure building. Walk or bike ences required. If interested call 513-872-3829 or email Runro1@ yrs) to summer activities 3 days a week, references and to class. Free parking and on-site laundry. $750 per month aol.com with your letter of interest, work history and references. good transportation needed. email [email protected] includes all heat and water. You can definately see your- self living here. Call Scott at 673-4946 to set an appointment.  For Rent Across from campus. Best deal for one quiet student: cute air condi-  tioned studios from $350 to $380. Huge deluxe two bedroom apart- Houses For Rent. 2, 3, and 4 bedroom houses available for this ment ideal for professor or two (maximum) quiet grad students $795.  winter, next summer and next school year, 2 blocks from campus, Also several summer rentals. For photos/info [email protected] clean, fully equipped, off street parking, laundry, next to other stu-  Renting for June or August, Amazing 6 Bedroom, 3 bath apart- dent housing, please call 513-616-3798 or email [email protected]  ment! - 1/4 mile from XU, Extremely large apartment! Feat- rues: X-Large Full kitchen w/ tiled counter tops, Very large liv- Apartment for Rent: Xavier Campus- Across from Brock- ing room, X-large private bedrooms, Fire place in most rooms, man Hall. Beautiful, well maintained, completely fur- front porch, A/C, Garage parking, excellent maintenance ser- nished 1 bedroom, 1 bath apartment. $650 per month in- vice, cable accent ligting, and a great party area in lower level! cludes gas, water, laundry facilities, and a parking space! $2,160.00 ($360 per person) includes all utilities! The apt  Available beginning June 2008. For details call: 513-631-1473. will go fast so don’t wait! For showings call (513) 266-6567.  Spring Break 2008. Sell Trips, Earn Cash and Go Free. Call for group discounts. Best Deals Guarenteed! Jamaica, Cancun, Acapulco,  Bahamas, S. Padre, Florida. 800-648-4849 or www.ststravel.com.   4 week of april 30, 2008 SPORTS T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e BRIEFS Miller inks new deal Baseball bounces back Doug Tifft, Editor Doug Tifft emily neubauer the come-from-behind victory with Staff Writer Sports Desk: 745-2878 Sports Editor a walk off single. Junior Jordan Success pays. Conley was an astonishing 5-for- [email protected] All in all, it wasn’t a bad week After Sean Miller guided the for the Xavier men’s baseball team. 5 at the plate with three singles, Men’s tennis gears Xavier Musketeers to an Atlantic After brutally losing to Ball State two doubles and a sacrifice fly and 10 Conference regular season title, by a final score of 14-4 on April 22 scored one run while tallying two up for NCAA Elite Eight appearance, and a school and suffering another loss against RBIs. Conley (1-0) picked up his record 30 wins, the university re- Miami (OH), 8-7, on April 23, first win of the season after relieving warded the coach with a lucrative they bounced back. The next three senior Mike Creevy in the 12th. 10 year contract extension. games all resulted in wins for the In the second game of the se- Miller, entering his fifth season team and a sweep of St. Bonaven- ries, it took a three-run homer in as the head coach of Xavier next ture by a total score of 15-9. the bottom of the sixth to seal the season, will receive a compensation Ball State (22-14) took an early victory. Senior Robbie Kelley went package of just under $1 million, lead after putting up three runs in 2-for-3 at the plate including the all making him the second highest the first and another in the second important game winning roundtrip- paid men’s basketball coach in the off of five hits for the 4-0 advan- per. Senior Michael Lucas (4-1) got Atlantic 10 Conference. Saint Louis tage and broke the game open with the win for Xavier after striking out coach Rick Majerus holds the top three-run fifth and sixth innings. seven while walking two in 7.0 in- spot in earnings for the conference, Freshman Ben Thomas (0-3) took nings of action. receiving a package worth $1 mil- Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com the loss for Xavier after striking The last game was even bet- lion dollars annually. Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com Junior Doug Matthews was After four seasons Sean Miller is out five while walking two over 4.2 ter. XU was able to not only win, Miller’s base salary will be the 2008 Atlantic 10 Most already the fifth winningest coach innings of work. but shut out St. Bonaventure by worth between $700,000 and Outstanding Player. in Xavier history with 93 wins. Xavier lost to Miami, even a final score of 4-0. Sophomore $800,000, a $200,000 a year raise On April 29 the Xavier men’s though three players went yard. left-handed pitcher Danny Rosen- from the contract that Miller and as Xavier’s head coach putting tennis team learned that their oppo- Senior Danny Hayden and juniors baum recorded a new career-high Xavier agreed to after the 2006-07 him in fifth place in school history nent in the first round of the NCAA Jack Bonnikson and Jordan Conley in strike-outs with 12 over 8.0 season. The deal will also include for wins. will be Illinois. The match is set for all hit homers for Xavier while scoreless innings of work. Xavier perks such as a country club mem- “This agreement represents an Friday, May 9. Miami had two home runs in the scored two runs in the fourth on a bership and a vehicle which brings unprecedented commitment by This will be Xavier’s first ever game as well. Conley led the team single by Junior Billy O’Connor. the total value of the contract to Xavier University to head coach team appearance in the NCAA offensively, going a perfect 2-for- They were able to score another just under $1 million. Xavier does Sean Miller,” said Xavier Associate tennis tournament. Xavier earned 2 at the plate with three RBIs and two in the sixth. With the win, and not release the specific details of Vice President and Athletic Direc- the A-10’s automatic berth to the two runs scored. Bonnikson also a Charlotte loss to Duquesne, XU employee salaries because it is a tor Mike Bobinski. NCAA tournament by knocking had a good day, going 2-for-3 with takes over sole possession of first private university. “It reflects our strong belief in off George Washington in the final two RBIs and two runs scored. In place in the A-10 standings heading “I would like to thank [Xavier Sean’s leadership of our basketball match of the A-10 tournament. the top of the eighth, Miami took into week 10. University President] Fr. Michael program and further solidifies our “Down the stretch we played control of the game by putting up Graham and Mike Bobinski for mutual desire to achieve success fantastic. We’ve won our last 14 of three runs. They never looked back. their incredible support of our at the highest level of Division I 16 matches. We’re playing the best Senior David Hartman (0-2) took basketball program and continued basketball.” tennis of the season right now and the loss for the Musketeers after belief in me as the head coach,” The long-term deal with Miller we’re taking it into the NCAAs. striking out two while walking said Miller. “Today’s commit- is a significant step forward for the We’re a confident bunch right now. none and giving up one run. Starter ment reinforces my own beliefs Xavier basketball program, that had We look to do well against Illinois,” freshman Brian Muransky tossed a and excitement about our future lost successful coaches Bob Staak, said head coach Eric Toth. Toth is career-high seven innings. together. With great anticipation I Pete Gillen, Skip Prosser and Thad in his first year as head tennis coach The tide would turn for Xavier look forward to continuing to build Matta to larger schools with more at Xavier. as the week went on. Holding a our program and the challenges that financial capabilities in the past. Illinois is the 15th ranked team three-run deficit heading into the accompany doing so.” Miller was said to have received in the country and is fresh off a near bottom of the ninth inning, the Miller, who started his time at offers from big time schools such upset over No. 2 Ohio State in the Xavier baseball team put up three Xavier as an assistant coach under as Indiana and LSU recently, but Big Ten Championship, following runs to send its contest with Atlan- then head coach Thad Matta in chose to stay at Xavier, signing the their placement as the National run- tic 10 foe St. Bonaventure into extra Photo courtesy GOXAVIER.com 2001, holds a 93-39 career record contract extension. ner-up in 2007. innings. The Musketeers pulled out Junior Jordan Conley. -Paid Advertisement- 5 T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e REID’S RECAP and Looney Letters YEAR IN REVIEW

— C R A Z I E S T O T H E E D I T O R — Editor’s note: Look, I don’t get a ton of mail from you readers; when I do, I do everything in my power to print it. Sometimes, though, I just can’t. Except for now! Here are some of my favorite “crazy” letters and why I couldn’t run them the first time. I left off names to save people embarassment, except for the one that mentioned his name a million times. Enjoy! Crazy Booze Crazy Comedian Crazy Candidate Editor’s note: Okay, this really consideration on the issues makes Editor’s note: So there was one Editor’s note: Not that we have 21 at 10 a.m. Eastern Time (EST) week where we got a couple of doesn’t count, because this wasn’t Paul a candidate who will listen to a problem with shameless self- and ending Dec. 5 at 11:59 p.m. a letter to the editor. But a certain students and young people, paying strange (and probably alcohol-fu- promotion, but this was a tad out EST you can go to www.ziddio. eled) letters. Interestingly enough, Ron Paul-supporter on staff this attention to their concerns. of the ordinary. Michael, I hope com/thelucky21 and vote for me, year decided that the rest of the He wants to bring accountabil- both were praising alcohol. They you won, and please don’t blame Michael Palascak. were unsigned, and one was a paper would share his political ity to government, more power to me if you didn’t; it just didn’t seem You can vote as many times views and typed this up. I laughed states and individuals, and renew poem, so obviously we couldn’t run to fit. Oh, and I haven’t been print- as you want so please vote 6,000 them in a normal, serious issue. But extensively, until I realized that I the recently lost respect that the ing the names of the unpublished times. So please vote for me about had to type up another staff ed to world has held for the United States I still cry out praise for “The Great writers, but since he mentioned his 6,000 times. Professors, please al- Randy’s!” every time I drive past it. fill the space. Then I was pissed. for decades. name umpteen times, I figured he low your students to vote for me Looking back, though, I wish I had There is only one presidential Never been, though. wouldn’t mind too much. 6,000 times. They can vote and So once a month we all go crazy run this next to all the crazy letters candidate for the Newswire, Dr. Dear Xavier Students, do well in class all at once, even if I got telling me to tell all of you Ron Paul. The Newswire encour- because a lame bar sells $1 beers Hi, my name is Michael Palas- it’s a chemistry lab. Just don’t vote and calls it senior night (yes, I hate to vote for Barack or for Hillary. ages students to find out more about cak. I graduated from Xavier in for me while lighting that bunsen Whoooo boy... exciting stuff there... Paul and the important stances Dana’s and BJ). We all love getting 2004 and moved up to Chicago to burner. tanked at Stones too, but at $7 a I’ll spare you; just read the fake he takes in order to uphold our pursue a career in writing, acting, Anyway, my name is Michael staff-ed that was written intending liberty. pitcher for Miller or LaBatt. .Yuck! and living with my parents. One of Palascak, and I may never run for The only thing good at Stones is the to be serious. those careers is doing really well. president but I am running for a As students, individual liberty is Miller girls... I want to invite you I recently performed in HBO’s The lesser known comedy contest, so all to a great place!!! Just down important to us. We don’t want the Crazy Cops Comedy Festival in Las Vegas, please show your support if you man telling us we can’t do this or Editor’s note: This letter really the road is a place where you can Nevada in Caesar’s Palace. It was a want. Alright, see you when I get get a better beer. A Bud Light. Oh must do that. We don’t like the idea isn’t too crazy, but the person didn’t really great time. It was just like be- there. of not having a choice. Moreover, sign it and as a result, we couldn’t and best of all, $1 beers...all day ing back at Xavier. All the statues, By the way congrats to Xavier everyday. You think you’re big? we don’t like people making deci- print it. We kinda agree with him, fountains, and cafeteria food. on all their comedy prodigies they sions that negatively affect us. but we’d have the guts to put our How about a $6 pitcher! Needless Anyway, I performed in The have right now. I keep on it. I do. to say the only other place to get a That is why the 2008 presiden- name to it. We don’t have reputa- Lucky 21 Competition. The Lucky Seriously. tial election is particularly impor- tions that could be tarnished. $1 beer is The Pub (getting drunk 21 is a new talent showcase where on campus is pretty great). But un- tant for college students. We need I graduated from XU several they put all the clips online for Michael Palascak | ‘04 leadership that will give us our years ago, and after a few minutes less you really like PBR, you just voting. Starting Wednesday, Nov. simply cannot beat that which is. . rights back, keep the government of browsing the latest edition of .THE GREAT RANDY’S. small and tell it to us straight up, “Police Notes” from the Newswire, with no B.S. have returned to some old feelings. * * * Crazy Critic The Newswire thinks that there Maybe XU police should start A Beer Poem Crazy Fingers Editor’s note: Calendar City— is only one candidate, from either cracking down on important issues Some facts that you all should know: you love it or you hate it. I suspect party, that can do that. He isn’t the that plague the Xavier community As Xavier begins to grow, Editor’s note: So Matt Finger it has something to do with whether most well-known candidate, but rather than stealing money from More handsome boys will take root wrote a column this year about or not you are able to recognize he is arguably the fastest growing college drinkers. Their own horns they may toot, *gasp* birth control. It was awe- the same joke when it’s told to you candidate in terms of money, rec- Get with it XU! College students But well the beer will still flow. some: controlled, well-researched, multiple times. Anyway, this guy ognition and support. drink and party! It’s just one way rational—I couldn’t believe Matt was upset by a certain Calendar The Newswire formally endorses to relieve the stress of academics. The Newswire Graduates: wrote it. Anyways, some people took City. He goes to Dayton, though. Dr. Ron Paul, former OB doctor It happens at 99.9 percent of col- severe offense. The more rational Apparently, Briana’s high-brow and 10-time U.S. Representative leges and universities nationwide. intellectual comedy has quite a far- Patrick Stevenson replies were printed, but this one... from Texas. Paul, a libertarian, has I’ll never give another dime of my well, let’s just say I loved reading it reaching following! (Briana, you always fought for individual liberty money to Xavier because of the Matthew Finger out loud, because my all-caps-voice are aware that I love you, right?) and the upholding of the constitu- way I was treated by the Office of Briana Hansen sounds SO ANGRY. tion. He is against the current war Student Life and Chief Couch. I’ll Amanda Gregory Briana, in Iraq, and is opposed to an inter- also steer high school students away Beth Hesse Matthew Finger, just leave XU Hello. I just read the Calen- ventionist foreign policy. from “the bubble” in Cincinnati. dar City from the week of Oct. Zach Nolden and go to Miami, UC or any protes- Paul is the presidential candidate Hey XU, maybe you should start tant school and get all the free com- 24, 2007. I would like to let you that students have been waiting for. treating your students like future doms you want. XU is a Catholic know that it SUUUUUCCCCCCK- Though you may not agree with donors with high paying jobs in- We’re so proud! Good luck, school as you know, so live with KKKKKs. Paul on every issue, his straight stead of student ATM machines. and know you’ll be missed. our values or LEAVE!! A Concerned Reader talk, intelligence and thought-out 06 Year in Review Arts & Entertainment T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e

Bon Apetit Xavier!: Fortune favors “Aida” Restaurant Reviews emily hoferer Managing Editor ‘07-‘08 The Xavier Players took a leap of faith this past weekend with the musical production of “Aida.” *Speckled Bird The play starts with a video of two people meeting in a museum, and then transitions to ancient *Betta’s Italian Oven Egypt. Here we are introduced to Radames, played by senior Kevin *Anna’s Hoggatt. He has put off his engage- ment to Princess Amneris, played by sophomore Michelle Anguiano, *Quatman’s for nine years. All is going well for the couple until Radames meets the Nubian *Sorrento’s princess Aida, played by junior Deja Tibbs. Instantly there is a con- nection. Radames saves her and the *H&H Grill women she was captured with from working in the mines by giving newswire photo by erika bresee them jobs in the palace. He gives Tibbs, Brinkley and Hoggatt sang their hearts out in “Aida” in front of packed audiences. *Bluebird Aida as a gift to Amneris. Aida and Radames’ quick eu- rupted with news of Amonasro’s the Office of Multicultural Affairs Aida bonds with Amneris over phoria is interrupted by the news escape. He and the other Nubians for the production and enlisted the the pressures of royalty. She also of the capture of the Nubian king manage to flee, but Aida chooses help of a great band and set design- befriends Mereb, played by senior Amonasro, played by gospel di- to stay behind and is caught. Aida er. My only complaint was that the Derek Brinkley, a Nubian who has rector Jerome Johnson. Aida is and Radames are punished and sent costumes were a little bland. been working in the palace for a overwhelmed with concern for her to be burried alive in the Egyptian There were some awkward long time. When Mereb discov- father and fears for her own life. sand. transitions and the singers were ers that she is a princess, he takes Radames and Aida agree that it The four lead characters were not enunciating at times. However, her to the Nubian camp to see her is better to part. Aida will flee on a all cast well, although I enjoyed I had the music stuck in my head people. boat provided by Radames during Mereb the most. They did a great for days after the play. To me, Radames begins to spend less his wedding to Amneris. Amneris job with numbers like “Not Me,” that is the true sign of a successful time with Amneris, and more time overhears the loving sentiments “My Strongest Suit” and “Dance musical. with Aida. They soon fall in love. between Aida and Radames now of the Robe.” The best number Tibbs and Hoggatt do a great job knows why her fiancé has been in the entire play was “The Gods Reprinted from the Newswire’s with Aida and Radames’ most no- so distant. The wedding between Love Nubia.” October 24, 2007 edition. table song “Elaborate Lives.” Amneris and Radames is inter- Xavier Players partnered with photo courtesy speckledbirdcafe.com XU’s Boller Bares His Soul

Katrina Sodaro itself is reminiscent of a pop- regrets history/Until then I Contributing Writer sicle during a nice day at will play the game/ of taking Maybe you’ve had Steve the beach, complete with the numbers, getting names.” Boller in one of your classes, sound of flapping flip flops. The CD also features more thinking he was just the av- Despite the brightness of the serious themes in “Reality” and erage Xavier freshman: a melody, the song is about that “All the Same,” which explore friendly face two or three desks feeling of letting a good lady confusion and the challenges away. It’s unlikely (though get away and that awkward- presented by growing up in slightly possible) that you ness of knowing when to make our culture. Boller exposes his looked at him and said to your- a move in dating (as discussed soul in these cuts, examining self, “I have a sneaking the heartbreaks of unful- suspicion that he is a very filled ambition and disap- talented musician and pointments in friendships songwriter. I just have with some lovely piano this feeling that he has work. more than one CD and he “Leave It All Behind” is has a dedicated fanbase definitely worth a listen on MySpace.” and has a high potential Well, if you did think of brightening your day. photo courtesytheseattletraveller.com that, it turns out you The album left me singing The controversial “Bodies . . .The Exhibition” will be on display at Union were right. along and looking forward Terminal until September 1 in Cincinnati. From the Indianapo- to what Boller will be lis area, Boller finished writing during his time his latest EP, “Leave at Xavier. He has yet to It All Behind,” shortly assemble a band here in before coming to Xavier. Cincinnati and is eager This album is chock-full to work with Xavier’s of sunny beats mixed fine musicians. Boller has with lyrics full of wishful found the Xavier commu- thinking and existential nity very receptive to his questioning. He wrote all work and hopes to perform of these songs during his more often at the univer- senior year of high school sity. Feel free to join his and sings them with a fan group on Facebook or voice that’s both confident in previous editions of the visit his music sites: www. and warm. His three major Newswire). steveboller.com and www. influences, Ben Folds, Jason The second song, “Can’t myspace.com/steveboller. Mraz and Jack Johnson, can Wait To Find Someone” follows be traced throughout Boller’s up with more finger-snap- music in his guitar style, but pingly good grooves and lyrics he has his own unique style that look forward to a future lyrically. with the right person. Boller R eprinted from t h e The infectiously catchy creatively expresses this hope Newswire’s December 12,

photos courtesytop40.about.com opening track, “Sitting on for a happy ending in the cho- 2007 edition. Nick Lachey visited Xavier’s campus to rehearse for their stint on “Clash an Island,” exemplifies what rus of “Taking Numbers, Get- of the Choirs.” Team Lachey won the competition and were awarded a he calls “juxtaposing mood ting Names,” “Til Cupid aims million dollars for Cincinnati’s Children’s Hospital. against melody.” The melody his bow at me/ and makes my T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e Arts & Entertainment Year in Review 07 Xavier, Faylor win laughs at Rooftop Emily Hoferer OSU student Laura Sanders who Arts & Entertainment Editor had lots to say about McGruf the Eight Xavier students beat out crime dog. Swan made the audience eight Ohio State students at the first giggle about extra airport security Rooftop Comedy College Competi- and the “Guinness Book of World tion on Wednesday, April 9 at Go Records.” Check out Reid Bananas Comedy Club. Xavier Reid Faylor took the stage and sophomore Reid Faylor was voted earned some of the loudest and Faylor’s routine the winner after his routine about longest laughs of the night. He had and vote for him beards, strip solitaire and hitch- some priceless phrases about kiss- hikers which he performed while ing and standing up to one’s mother. to be in the final playing his guitar. Mike Sause entertained the crowd The event was hosted by Roof- with his Bush impersonation and four at www. top Comedy, a production company Jaclyn Stenger educated us about that specializes in stand up comedy. run-ins with the men’s basketball rooftopcomedy. This was their first ever college team. Charles Galvin’s routine in- competition and they visited 32 uni- cluded his version of his Olympic com! versities across the country looking story complete with the “Chariots for the funniest college students. of Fire” theme song in the back- photo courtesy www.rooftopcomedy.com Sophomore Reid Faylor at his Rooftop Comedy audition with his The winners get a chance to go to ground. Zach Berger brought up the trademark guitar. Aspen, Colo. for the Rooftop Com- rear, and after countless Catholic edy Festival and a cash prize. jokes that were a theme of the night Even though Xavier students took The match between OSU and for many comedians, Berger was a many shots at OSU for their basket- Xavier was a semi-final compe- breath of fresh air with his take on ball team’s appearance in the NIT “Hot ‘n Throbbing” tition. The comedy team from Judaism. this season, it was all in good fun. Xavier, comprised of seniors Ray Spliced between Xavier routines Starting April 21, voting on the O’Brien, Briana Hansen, Rosie were those of OSU students, but Rooftop Comedy website will open. Swan, Jaclyn Stenger, juniors Zach most of these proved too insig- Each student’s routine will also be with meaning Berger, Mike Sause, Charles Galvin posted on the website for viewing. nificant or dirty to mention. One emily hoferer and sophomore Reid Faylor were If Faylor gets voted into the top comedian, listed as Grande on the Arts & Entertainment Editor complexities, and Berger was funnier and classier than all eight four, he will be guaranteed a spot website, crossed too many lines. The Xavier Player’s production able to do it. Ohio State students. at the festival in Aspen. Voting ends Sorry, Grande, rape and domestic of Paula Vogel’s “Hot ‘n Throb- It also takes a brave woman Matt Starr from OSU started off April 30. Keep track of Faylor’s abuse are just not funny. bing” is the most controversial yet to pole dance and strip in front of the first of 16 five-minute stand-up progress over the summer on Com- I was afraid OSU’s Matt Starr, meaningful play in their line-up people for a part, and freshman routines with jokes about shaken edy Rooftop’s website.to see if he who started out the night, was go- this season. Lauren Yadlowsky did a great babies and Alzheimer’s. Briana will be traveling to Aspen. ing to be the best they had to offer. Freshman Kelli Brinker takes on job. This girl is more than just the Hansen jump started the Xavier Luckily, I was wrong. Mark Lucas, the tough role of Charlene, a single physicality of the part, she is also team with a bang and educated all whose routine about being from mother divorced from her abusive a wonderful actress and broke my of us about what Facebook stalking a small town and Adolf Hitler’s husband, played wonderfully by heart by the end of the play. Senior really is. She was followed by Ray methamphetamine dealer, won him Zach Berger. Byron Bryson had the challenge of O’Brien, who earned many laughs the title of contest runner-up. He Reprinted from the Newswire’s Charlene is stressed out—not playing many small characters in from the crowd when talking about almost upstaged Faylor. April 16, 2008 edition. only are her tumultuous teen- his role as the male voiceover and his own political slogan. Having Overall, I was immensely im- age kids, Leslie Ann played by he did very well. seen O’Brien’s stand up before, I’d pressed with the Xavier students’ sophomore Abby Booth and Calvin Booth, who played the energetic have to say that this was his best ability to be funny, and even a little played by junior Jeff Meinert, caus- and sometimes obnoxious Leslie material. crude, but not to the extent of some ing her a headache, but she’s also Ann, bothered me throughout the Senior Roise Swan came after of the cringe-worthy OSU routines. close to deadline on her screenplay. play, but my views on her changed -Paid Advertisement- Although Charlene is no Oscar win- at the end (which I’m not going to ning screenwriter, her screenplays dare reveal here). Meinert inserted are considered women’s erotica. lots of innocence and youth into his Director Erin Bukowski clev- performance as Calvin. erly staged the scenes of Charlene Good performances aside, the and her crumbling family between play itself stands as a solid written steamy scenes with a male and work that explores taboo subjects female voiceover. which should These voiceovers, be discussed particularly the Hot ‘n Throbbing more often. f e m a l e ’s , a c t While the pro- out Charlene’s Starring: Kelli Brinker, Zach mos say that screenplays in Berger, Abby Booth this play rais- the beginning, Newswire Official Rating: es questions but soon come aboutdomestic to represent her violence and and her husband «««« pornography Clyde as the ten- and if they are sion between related, the play them builds. This itself makes no was delicately done and it really direct connection. Instead, it leaves helped set the tone of the play. it open to the audience to see if The play is intense from start to pornography, and more importantly, finish, with a subtle mix of humor, our overall sexuality as humans, but from the opening lines the audi- can harm or better our relationships ence can literally feel the tension in with others. the character of Charlene. Brinker My only qualm was that some did a wonderful job of capturingthe of the interactions among the char- vulnerability and struggle in her acters made me uncomfortable, as life. it should, but it’s just plain weird However, the actor who stole if the actress playing Leslie, who the show was Zach Berger. Imme- is Clyde’s daughter, starts stroking diately the audience wants to hate him. It’s hard for the audience to him because he beats his wife. As get it out of their heads. his dialogue with Charlene carries It is my hope that the Players the play we see that he is a tortured continue to bring more provocative soul, and I came close to sympathiz- and stirring works to campus, even ing with him (but not quite). It’s if they continue to promote pole hard to play someone who is mean, dancing lessons. but it’s even harder to play their Reprinted from the Newswire’s February 6, 2008 edition. 8 Year in Review FeaTURE T h e X a v i e r N e w s w i r e

April 25 Kyle Wake, Preston Gaby, R.J. Thieneman, Sara Roper and Kate Malone (left to right) perform as the SGA during “Xavier: The Musical.”

April 8 Patrick Russel (below) sings both Aladdin and Jasmine’s parts in “A Whole New World” during the Mr. Muskie competition, which was eventually won by Ola Shokunbi. Novermber 30 Ally White (below) and a new friend at Dance Marathon. the year in photos

October 19 Sophomore Kelly Ruth (right) earns a double-double during “Dig for the Cure,” in which Xavier knocked off October 23 First Semester twelwth-ranked Fr. Michael Graham, with a Xavier delegation, meets the Pope The library, midway through its transitions into the model for Dayton 3-1. during a Jewish-Christian relations conference in Vatican City. the Learning Commons.

January Coffee Emporium (below), a small local chain that began in 1973, replaced supplanted Victory Perk at its location in the Gallagher Student Center.

December 12 Fans (above) cheer on the Muskies at the mens Skyline Chili Crosstown Shootout. The Muskies came out on top of the low-scoring battle 64-59.

February 7 Freshman Lauren Yadlowsky (right) during “Hot ‘N Throbbing,” one of the year’s more controversial and meaning pieces performed by the Xavier Players.