Xavier University Exhibit
All Xavier Student Newspapers Xavier Student Newspapers
2009-04-01
Xavier University Newswire
Xavier University (Cincinnati, Ohio)
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Recommended Citation Xavier University (Cincinnati, Ohio), "Xavier University Newswire" (2009). All Xavier Student Newspapers. 561. https://www.exhibit.xavier.edu/student_newspaper/561
This Book is brought to you for free and open access by the Xavier Student Newspapers at Exhibit. It has been accepted for inclusion in All Xavier Student Newspapers by an authorized administrator of Exhibit. For more information, please contact [email protected]. April 1, 2009 Xavier Newswire Volume XCIV Published since 1915 by the students of Xavier University Issue 25
News, pg 2 Sports, pg 6 Corporate role model A tale of two teams Always Online: Ethics exemplar shares business Halftime lead disappears as xavier.edu/ story with Xavier audience Musketeers bow out of tourney newswire inside @ Queer Week promo Senate approves SGA budget items stolen, damaged Budget for SGA 2009-10 Budget 2009-10 more At a Glance (if ratified by SAC) accessible, $451,000 Club/Organization funding: Club includes more sports, Senior Board, etc. Priority funding: Shuttles, funding for $124,883 O’Connor subsidies, Late Night, etc. student clubs SAC operations funding: Concert & By Kathryn Rosenbaum $124,500 event programming, workshops, etc. News Editor The Student Government $74,265 SGA labor/stipend funding: SGA Association Senate voted to pass leaders, resource assistant, etc. the SGA budget for the proposed SGA operations budget: Executive 2009-10 academic year, paving $60,635 the way for the Student Activities projects, Club Day on the Mall, etc. Council to ratify it later this week. for clubs over 50 percent of the $7,250 for president, $5,250 for The budget, created by outgo- budget. Association and Legislative Vice ing president Craig Scanlon and Club and organizational spend- Presidents and $3,450 for SAC the Budget Review Committee, ing accounts for about 54 percent chair and Senate Coordinator. includes increases in the alloca- of the 2009-10 budget, up from Other changes in the 2009-10 tions for student clubs and orga- about 45 percent of last year’s budget will affect students more nizations and a slight decrease in budget. directly. the money SGA spends on itself. SGA’s Financial Affairs The budget for the Weekend “[Previous budgets were] scat- Committee is responsible for allo- Entertainment Shuttle, formally tered and difficult to understand,” cating funds to clubs and organi- the First Friday shuttle to Newport, Scanlon said. “This new budget zations. Hale said the committee is Ky., decreased to $2,500. is easier to understand and high- working on allocations this week. Students might have to pay a Newswire photo by Emily Hoferer lights SGA’s priorities.” The new budget has internal fee to use this shuttle, as well as On the academic mall, some 2,400 flags fly, to memorialize victims of hate The 2009-10 budget contains SGA spending cuts of $1,200 for airport shuttle next year. crimes directed at the LGBTQ community, as a part of Queer Week. smaller accounts that will “be easi- SAC’s summer workshop, $400 Scanlon said cuts for the cam- By Sarah Wieten tion about the origins of the term er to track” because they have spe- for a Senate conference and $500 pus readership program might lead Staff Writer “queer”. cific uses, said sophomore senator for the SGA banquet. to fewer Cincinnati Enquirers on In the last two days, over $200 By Tuesday, over 100 of them Chris Hale, the co-chair of the Next year’s budget is “more of campus, but few other changes. worth of damage has been done had been stolen or destroyed. Financial Affairs committee and a McDonald’s budget, instead of a The budget also allows for SAC to promotional table tents, fly- Chartwells administration at Hoff a member of the Budget Review steakhouse budget,” said Hale. to provide complete funding for ers, t-shirts and banners promot- volunteered to reprint them on Committee. The elimination of one of the Late Night Snack and Late Night ing Xavier Alliance’s Queer Week plain, white paper. Scanlon said he and the Budget off-campus shuttles, which was Movies since Gallagher Student events. “If anything, the theft and Review Committee made a num- recommended by the Structural Center is not providing program A police report has been filed vandalism of Queer Week promo ber of changes to increase fund- Review Task Force, will save SGA funding next year. detailing the damages. testifies to the importance and ne- ing for clubs, while decreasing in- an additional $20,000. SGA cur- “This is a signature program The vandalism comes as no cessity of this week. ternal spending. rently contributes $40,000 to op- and we wanted to make sure it was surprise to Alliance President and “Clearly Xavier is not as accept- Scanlon said it should be an erate the two shuttles. clear it was a priority to continue co-organizer of Queer Week, ju- ing of an environment as many SGA priority to keep funding Executive stipends remain at this program,” said Scanlon. nior Cameron Tolle. believe it to be,” Tolle said. “I think most people on cam- “Bigotry is still undoubtedly pus would be shocked to hear present on campus, and Alliance about the hostility that has been will continue to educate and advo- In a bind, ‘Athenaeum’ seeks bailout By Meghan Berneking members of the club informed the “They may be given a reduced directed towards the Lesbian-Gay- cate against discrimination in or- Asst. Campus News Editor current leadership that there was budget or required to participate Bi-Transsexual-Queer community der to foster an inclusive campus A financial “miscommuni- plenty of money in the budget. in additional fundraising oppor- on campus by a small minority of environment,” he said. cation” between the Student With this understanding, the tunities. They ultimately made a closed minded individuals. While these events may point Government Association and staff club ordered the printing of its financial commitment they could “It’s a wakeup call that hope- to some negative feelings in the members at “the Athenaeum” has fall edition, leaving itself a deficit not honor,” he said. fully forces everyone to consider Xavier community toward Queer left the literary magazine’s pub- of nearly $970. Scanlon said he would be in how issues of queer diversity are Week, other responses have been lishers with a deficit and in need In order to pay the bill, the club contact with the magazine’s lead- dealt with on campus,” Tolle said. overwhelmingly positive. of an SGA “bailout.” turned to members of the SGA ership and advisors to come to an A sign in the Gallagher Student A candlelight vigil Monday “Last fall there was a miscom- financial affairs committee, who agreement in the near future. Center stairwell describing the evening in remembrance of the munication between a member discovered some discrepancies. “While we are helping “the week’s events was removed less victims of LGBTQ-directed hate of “the Athenaeum”’s staff and a “[The Financial Affairs Athenaeum” in this particular sit- than three hours after being post- crimes drew a crowd of 85. member of SGA which led “the Committee] looked at historical uation…I would recommend that ed. It has since been replaced. Also on Monday, Alliance host- Athenaeum” to believe we had a records to find that the club never this is not a precedent that should Over half the promotional lit- ed an event passing out free “Gay? budget. We published the fall issue, received an initial budget, or even be followed in subsequent years,” erature posted on bulletin boards Fine by me.” T-shirts on the resi- fully believing the money was in applied for an initial budget, at said Scanlon. in Alter Hall and in other buildings dential mall. our budget. It was not until some the beginning of the school year,” on campus has been torn down. Alliance first made these shirts time later that we found out it was said Scanlon. ©2008 The “Gay? Fine by me.” T-shirt available in spring of 2007. The not,” said senior Amelia Keller, According to Scanlon, SGA the Xavier Newswire that was placed on the D’Artangan demand for these promotional All rights reserved president of the Athenaeum. will likely provide the funding statue outside of Cintas Center as items was so great that this year’s SGA sees the situation needed for the club to pay off its a promotional sign approved by supply of T-shirts was exhausted differently. debt, as the purchase has already university administration was torn in seven minutes. “The current members [of been made. off around 4:30 p.m. Monday. “The very high demand for Fax (513) 745-2898 “the Athenaeum”] made a pur- “While I will be authoriz- Alliance placed purple card- these shirts shows that the indi- Advertising (513) 745-3561 chase without thoroughly consult- ing this ‘bailout’, the club will be stock table tents on dining tables viduals who have stolen or vandal- Circulation (513) 745-3130 ing their budget,” said senior Craig made aware that there will be con- in the James Hoff Dining Center ized queer week promo are in the Editor-in-Chief (513) 745-3607 Scanlon, president of SGA. sequences for the following year,” early in the week with informa- minority,” said Tolle. www.xavier.edu/newswire According to Scanlon, previous Scanlon said. Fiat Justitia, Ruat Coelum 2 April 1, 2009 News Xavier Newswire News Brief Speaker advocates ethics The Xavier Library Committee invites all students to a lunch- discussion at 11:30 a.m. on Wednesday, April 1 and Thursday, April Former CEO shares story of corporate social responsibility 2. The discussion will focus on the changes that the Xavier com- munity would like to see when the library is renovated next year. By Andrew Chestnut Design Editor Dewey’s pizza and soft drinks will be provided. Please contact In months that are marred by Donna Patterson at [email protected] with questions. daily reports of the latest corpo- -Paid Advertisement- rate failures or corrupt bailout bo- nuses, Xavier brought a story of optimism from the business world to campus. Aaron Feuerstein, a champion KGE=DAC=AL@GL&&&:ML of ethical business practice, spoke Monday, March 30 about his per- DGLKEGJ=
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March 24, 11:02 p.m. – Campus Police, Cincinnati Fire and Rescue Police and Residence Life responded for a fire alarm in Brockman hall. Stocks have Popcorn burning in a microwave taken a nose dive. Notes on the ground floor activated the Unemployment is alarm. The system was reset. at its highest rate in decades. Few March 23, 9:46 p.m. – A stu- March 26, 12:10 a.m. – dent reported the theft of a wal- Campus Police and Residence things remain a let and cell phone from an un- Life investigated the report of a sure bet in these locked locker at the O’Connor student smoking marijuana in the uncertain Sports Center. Commons. The student was cited. economic times. Paraphernalia and a small amount March 24, 12:46 a.m. – of marijuana was confiscated. Except the Campus Police and Residence value of Life investigated a dispute be- March 27, 1:32 p.m. – An tween two students and one employee reported the theft of a knowledge. non-student in apartment hous- bench from the Williams College Note of the ing over a relationship. One of of Business lobby. Physical Plant the students was cited for mak- was notified. ing threats to the non-student. March 29, 1:18 a.m. – A stu- Week March 24, 1 p.m. – A con- dent observed urinating in the Invest in Success. tract employee reported the bushes near Edgecliff hall was March 29, 3:32 a.m. theft of a book from the book- cited for underage consumption – Campus Police cited a Combine the value of a graduate degree with the quality store on March 4. of alcohol. student for disorderly con- duct. The student admit- reputation of the University of Louisville and you will gain a solid March 24, 3:32 p.m. – An March 29, 2:02 a.m. – Campus ted to blocking the first investment that gives you an edge in today’s chaotic market. employee reported the theft of Police cited a student observed floor lobby in Brockman Studies show that those with a master’s degree earn on two pictures left from a photo running a stop sign in the C-1 lot hall with vending machines, average $400,000 more over their careers than they would with a contest in the Gallagher Student for operating a vehicle while under furniture, garbage cans, etc. Center second floor lobby. the influence of alcohol, underage bachelor’s degree alone. Those with a doctoral degree have an in- consumption and reckless driving. creased earning potential on average of $1.3 million more over their March 24, 7:52 p.m. – careers than if they had a bachelor’s degree only. Campus Police arrested a con- March 30, 12:26 a.m. – A tract employee at Cintas Center student reported the theft of a Amy Windhorst, Campus News Editor Invest in your success. Learn more about our graduate programs who had two outstanding war- poster from the Gallagher Student Phone: 745-3607 at: www.graduate.louisville.edu [email protected] rants. The subject was released Center lobby. to Cincinnati Police.
The University of Louisville is an equal opportunity institution. SGA AD!!!!!! 4 April 1, 2009 Opinions&Editorials Xavier Newswire Xavier Newswire Copyright 2009 Circulation 3,000 Editor-in-Chief & Publisher John LaFollette Managing Editor Emily Hoferer Mng. Editor for Special Projects Kelly Shaw Business Manager David Cranston Advertising and Classifieds Manager Ellie Jaqueth Ad Sales Manager Chelsey Alexander Distribution Manager Skip Young Adviser Patrick Larkin Op-Ed Editor: darren lacour Assistant Op-Ed Editor: katherine monasterio Online & Design Editor: andrew chestnut Photo Editor: erika bresee Head Copy Editor: madeline lafave Copy Editors: maggie cardosi. monica laco, kate phillips, dan rozier, ashley sroufe, sarah wieten EDITORIAL | QUEER WEEK This intolerance has to stop The Newswire has an idea (what else is new?): If you’re one of the goons who defaced Queer Week promo mate- rial, tore down the t-shirt donned by D’Artagnan or swiped table dis- plays in the caf, you should dig a hole and climb in and hug yourself until you grow up or die, because the rest of us are ready to live in the real world. The Newswire is sick of intolerance (no matter how episodic) on Xavier’s campus. It’s 2009 and there’s too much going on to worry LETTERS about what kinds of lifestyles you—yes, you—approve of or don’t. I’m working on it! would have been pointed in my suggestions offered by the author The Xavier bubble is small, but it’s bigger than just you. Pop yours or direction. of this piece. First, a $40,000 al- move away from here. I’m fixing the shuttle system. About a month ago, an an- lotment out of SGA’s $842,000 is We believe it’s probably important to make a note here (because the That’s not 100% true. Myself nouncement was made over the 4.7% not ‘a little over 10 percent.’ target audience will undoubtedly raise an objection). No one is telling and a committee of people who portal stating that I would be Second, if consistency is an is- you that you have to change your mind; we’ve all moved past that, too. responded to an announcement forming a Shuttle System Review sue, taking people directly to their This point bears repeating: it’s important to form your own thoughts. on the portal are fixing the shuttle Committee, in which a “more houses will significantly decrease This doesn’t mean that certain thoughts aren’t invalid. If you think system. structurally sound route” would the consistency and dependability that certain types of people are inferior for their differences, for ex- In response to Andrew be formed. If the author of this of the shuttle system. Finally, the ample, then your thoughts are invalid. If those thoughts lead you to Chestnut’s column, “Fix the editorial had done any research liability that would be placed upon others that lead you to act on them, and you destroy others’ property in Shuttle System,” (March 25, into the issue, it would have been the university to have the shuttle that thought sequence, then you’ve affirmed nothing except your own 2009), I am wondering how much easy to find information on how dropping off students at specific invalidity. research was put into this article. this committee has met and col- houses is so great, I am shocked If you can’t live as a human being aged 18 years in a community with There is a Newswire representative laborated with Dr. Luther Smith, this author even proposed that other humans without turning it into your own private space then we’ve who sits in on every Senate meet- who is the connecting line between idea. done all we can for you. ing, in which elected officials, my- Xavier’s shuttle and the shuttle There is one thing the author The Newswire is tired of always going at your pace. You drag the self included, sit and discuss ways service provider, Crosswells. and I agree upon: There must be a whole university down, make us waste time catering to you in space like to make this university a better This past weekend, in the first safe and useful shuttle system that this. If you need some water, take a break and catch up as soon as you place. effort of “Shuttle Revamping,” the meets the needs of Xavier stu- can. We’d be glad to have you, but you’ve got to do better than this. For the past two months, I Saturday Shopping Shuttle pick- dents. This is a goal that SGA is have reported at each of these up/drop-off location was moved committed to and currently mak- EDITORIAL | SGA BUDGET meetings on the research, collabo- from Bellarmine Circle to outside ing a great deal of progress on. ration, progress and future of my of the caf. A ‘simple change’ if I From one student organization Accountability is the key most recent project: Improving do say so myself. Ridership went to another, please do not publish After years of disconnect between students and the Student the shuttle system. If the author from 40 the previous weekend, to things that are not researched. Government Association, SGA is trying to increase its transparency of this editorial had spoken with 82. and encourage students to hold SGA accountable for its spending of anyone involved in either SGA or Additionally, I would like to Neil Heckman | ‘11 student’s tuition money. the shuttle policy, I am sure they address some of the concerns and Two-Star Senator In a time when budgets are tight, SGA has taken time to carefully lay out exactly how $842,406 is going to be spent. This transparency and careful allocation seems to indicate that SGA is attempting to utilize money effectively during unknown economic times. Thought the news industry was (Think again) SGA members have made strides to decrease internal spending on DEAD? banquets, conferences and gifts. Internal cuts can contribute to in- creased spending on clubs. This is a step that tries to dispel SGA’s image The Newswire is hiring for the following positions for 2009-10: of elitism and wasteful spending. No more SGA jackets that single out senators or end of the year banquets at Montgomery Inn. These spend- ing cuts alone do not create an image of an organization completely in News Opinion News Editor tune with students, but does suggest they recognize more economical Columnist spending is necessary. Campus News Editor Although some internal spending was cut, stipends were not low- Cartoonist ered. The association president makes $7,250 a year plus a summer sti- General Assignment pend. For the amount of time and effort SGA executives, the SAC chair Reporter Arts & and the Senate coordinator put in, they deserve a stipend. However, a $9,500 stipend is a large stipend and well beyond what any other student Business Entertainment leader makes. However, it seems highly unlikely that stipends will be lowered. Business Manager Arts & These large stipends further underscore accountability. It is easy to cre- Advertising Manager Entertainment Editor ate a document in hopes of promoting responsibility, but harder for Ad Sales Manager Assistant Arts & students and SGA itself to hold it accountable for spending, initiatives Entertainment Editor and projects. However, without this accountability, the document is just Online Editor a nicely organized piece of paper. Staff Writer On the Web: www.xavier.edu/newswire Photography The Xavier Newswire is published weekly statements and opinions of a columnist do not Download an application throughout the school year, except during vacation necessarily reflect those of editors or general staff. Photo Editor and final exams, by the students of Xavier University, Subscription rates are $30 per year or $15 per at our website, 3800 Victory Parkway, Cincinnati, OH 45207- semester within the USA and are prorated. 2129. Subscription inquiries should be directed to Staff Photographer www.xavier.edu/newswire. The Editorials are written by a different staff John LaFollette, 513-745-3607. Direct questions to member each week and do not necessarily reflect the Advertising inquiries should be directed to sentiments of the entire staff. They are also not the Ellie Jaqueth, Advertising Manager, 513-745-3561. John LaFollette at sole responsibility of the Opinions and Editorials One copy of the Xavier Newswire, distributed Sports (513) 745-3607 or editor to write. on campus, is free per person per week. Additional The statements and opinions of the Xavier copies are 25 cents. Staff Writer [email protected] Newswire are not necessarily those of the student Xavier University is an academic community body, faculty or administration of Xavier. The committed to equal opportunity for all persons. Xavier Repository-Guardian Giving the gullible reason to ponder April 1, 2009 Study discovers ‘no Freshman still can’t Xavier officials foil Your roommates want SAC announces weekly one cares’ get to Wayland Ave. terrorists’ plot you to do the dishes concert series Researchers find that your Directionally-challenged Efforts to supply Xavier “Just get off your lazy ass The Rolling Stones, Phish, friends don’t care about Patrick Jenkins can’t find a students with “alcohol,” a for ten minutes... how do Jurassic 5, Daft Punk, To Be your cool English teacher party on Wayland where no well-known WMD, thwarted you live like this... you’re like Announced scheduled to play be from high school. B3 one wants him, anyway. A18 by administration. A2 a damn animal...” Op-Ed fore summer holiday begins. A57 inside Raymond cited in Xavier re-sells Zumbiel site Commons disturbance God-forsaken tract apparently unuseable; future of site uncertain By John Lafollette Editor-in-(mis)Chief Citing the on-going economic crisis and the uncertainty of the future, Xavier has sold the old Zumbiel plant plot back to its original owners for an undisclosed sum. Following the suspension of the Xavier Square project, the univer sity had no use for the sprawling wasteland that was left after the implosion of the Zumbiel plant a year ago. “The only logical choice was to sell it,” said a Xavier official who Photo courtesy of xavier.edu/newswire shared the information on condi B.J. Raymond was reprimanded for “failing to regulate” his well-known intensity. In this recent photo, Raymond celebrates after whooping a fool in tion of anonymity. Photo courtesy of xavier.edu/newswire a round of GoldenEye 007. “The land is an eye-sore, it’s true,” the official said. An artist’s rendition of the plans for the new Zumbiel site, which was By Doug Tifft to enter the apartment, at which The Xavier official noted that recently re-sold by Xavier University. The old site, which was acquired for Commons Correspondent point they found Raymond seated this decision was made only after exponentially more than it was worth, was abandoned as an impropitious wasteland after the Zumbiel Packaging Plant was imploded. Xavier Campus Police cited on his couch playing a Nintendo all other plausible options were senior Benjamin Raymond for a 64 video game. exhausted. ated Center for Industrial Grade debris blowing from the Zumbiel minor disturbance of peace on “I just get excited and let out a “We took a long and hard look Packaging. site onto private property. Monday, March 30 after alleviating yell sometimes when I’m kicking at the situation, and considered a In the weeks leading up to the “[The barren landscape] creates fears of a potential crime scene. ass in Mario Kart,” said Raymond, number of alternatives to re-sell decision, Xavier’s neighbors in the impression that we haven’t After receiving numerous phone a Communication Arts major who ing the land,” said the official. Norwood and Evanston had been done all we needed to,” the offi calls about loud screaming coming is better known around Xavier’s “In the end though, getting increasing their calls for Xavier cial said. from an apartment on the second campus as a guard on the men’s it off our to-do list was the best to clean up the property, which “We’ve now started to direct floor of the Commons apartment basketball team and the program’s decision.” had been mentioned as a possible those concerned individuals to the complex, some students worried winningest player. Other options considered by filming location for the motion new owner [of the decrepit, God- about the well-being of the apart No charges were filed against the university included a new picture adaptation of Cormac forsaken acreage].” ment’s residents. Raymond, and no further action recreational sports center, a wind McCarthy’s post-apocalyptic nov The buyers of the site declined According to a report, Campus was taken other than to issue a farm, an additional facility for the el “The Road.” comment, except to say that their Police rushed to the scene and uti verbal warning to lower his voice Williams College of Business and Area businesses, as well as resi plans for the property will seem lized their bullrushing instruments in residential settings. a building to house the newly-cre dents, have been complaining of familiar.
Stinky trees to be burned Let it ride: Univ. diversifies By Kelly Shaw the trees are only meant to pro tree flowers. Annuals Editor vide a visually pleasing campus to Local environmental groups are investments amidst crisis Xavier’s campus will not be students, Lyle does not accept this upset at the university’s decision See NEWS, pg. A-2 blossoming as usual this spring explanation. to chop down the trees, claiming due to student complaints that “I pay enough to go to school that the environment should not some of the flowering trees give here that every minute of my day suffer for the well-being of any off an intolerable smell. should be happy. I shouldn’t be person, let alone a Xavier student. Physical Plant receives com made to suffer by the scent of These groups plan to stage a plaints every spring about the those trees,” said Lyle. protest at the burning of the trees, smell of the white-flowering trees Not wanting to enter into an and are further upset at Physical called Bradford Pear trees, but other lawsuit, Xavier administra Plant for being evasive in setting a this year one student ensured that tion has instructed Physical Plant burning time. no Xavier student will ever again to eradicate the trees. On April 7 The administration supports the smell or see the trees. the trees will be chopped down, burning of the trees as evidence Senior Claire Lyle has formally and burned. that the school does all it can for complained to Physical Plant for The burning will take place after its students. the past three springs, but this 2 a.m. and before 5 p.m. to ensure However, there are hints that spring she took it to a new level that Physical Plant workers will tuition may be adjusted next year by filing a lawsuit against the uni not have to wake up any earlier as the university incurs the cost of versity for the damages she has than they already do. this project. incurred from the smell. Keeping in line with the prom Currently, the administration’s “Walking past those trees on ise to be a green campus, adminis only concern is that prospective my way to class puts me in a bad trators attempted to conserve the students may not be pleased with mood for the whole month of flowers by donating bouquets to the lack of trees, so Physical Plant April,” said Lyle. close-by funeral homes, but there will soon be replacing them with While administrators claim that was no demand for Bradford Pear Ginkgo trees. don’t think it’s true and sue us Xavier A2 April 1, 2009 Campus News Repository-Guardian New MyXU Portal features to include actual portal By Andrew Chestnut back in time so she could earn Unpaid Intern an A in a class in which she had The Xavier Department of earned a B+ as a freshman, es- Web Services held a press confer- sentially “crushing” her medical ence Monday to announce specif- school aspirations. ic features of the revamped portal Freshman Jimmy Peterson system planned for next year. promised to use the technology to The most notable among these somehow “get laid.” features will be that the portal The Hell-Portal feature will system will actually act as a portal be accessible under the “Student to hell, as well as the previously Services” tab of the upcoming unknown 4th and 5th dimen- portal system. sions and the basement of the Brian Holubetz, Library Help “Funeral Home” party house at Desk Technician, said of this deci- 3901 Reading Road, among other sion, “We chose to place this fea- demonic realms. ture under the ‘Student Services’ During a testing phase of tab because that is the only tab the new technology, previously any student ever uses.” He added, thought impossible by the scien- “I doubt anyone could even find tific community, IT technician the ‘Library and Technology’ tab Jason Albertson freely walked be- if their life depended on it.” tween his office in Schott Hall and IT technicians are reportedly the post-apocalyptic Hellscape de- working on an upgrade that will picted by Resident Evil 4. allow people to possess the MyXU “It was amazing,” said “Person of the Week” for 15 min- Albertson, “one minute I was utes and then be dumped on the looking at my computer screen, side of the New Jersey Turnpike, the next minute I was desperately just as it happened in the film searching for boxes of shotgun Above: The Xavier IT team demonstrates the prototype of the new MyXU page. The program launches June 6 at 6 p.m. “Being John Malkovich.” ammo so I could shoot zombies in sucking the life force from former locales, including Mordor, Alzoc forthcoming Hell-Portal has been Albertson said his department the face.” He added, “Absolutely Newswire reporter Jeff McMurray. III in the Outer Rim and Detroit, overwhelmingly receptive. would also follow up on requests incredible.” “We regret the tragic events Mich. Michael Stevens, a sophomore to portal access to alternate “bi- During a special demonstration that occurred during the test run,” “Mordor was pretty bad, with marketing major, said, “This is zarro” universes, so students of the “Hell-Portal”—as Xavier IT the Department of Web Services all the fire and everything, but I going to be sweet. I’m going to could study potential worlds in gurus are calling it—Samara, the said in a statement, “We wish have to say, Detroit scared the s**t use it to go to [‘Southpark’s’] which it is okay to drink on cam- evil demonic girl from the horror Jeff ’s family the best in their time out of me,” Albertson said. “And Imaginationland so I can see Luke pus and the Muskie is a reputable film “The Ring,” emerged from a of loss.” the University of Dayton wasn’t Skywalker and fight ManBearPig.” source of news. well and materialized through the Xavier IT technicians have also much better.” Beth Wilson, a junior biology Jeff McMurray (1986-2009) also computer screen, subsequently reported visiting other ethereal The student reaction to the major, said she hoped to travel contributed to this report. XU administration gets lucky Terrorist plot foiled By mily oferer E H $20. “Most of the time, I just win Some of the first things the By Darren LaCour vertisements for the event in Newswire Highroller more scratch offs and keep play- university is going to purchase Lord of the Dance Alter Hall. “Anytime I see ‘Beer,’ Due to recent budget cuts at ing,” he said. “It’s a sick, vicious once they acquire some money ‘Alcohol’ or ‘Keg,’ I know no good the university, the administration is cycle.” from the lottery is a shuttle (the Dean of Students Dr. Luther can come of it,” he said. coming up with creative measures The official wouldn’t com- current shuttle system is currently Smith, Chief of Police Michael The promotional fliers con- to scrap together some change. ment on what specific types of comprised of the club football Couch and other Xavier University tained all three words. One notable action is the scratch-offs he indulges in, but he team and rickshaws). Campus Police officers foiled a Smith contacted Couch about purchase of lottery tickets. One would say that he and president They then plan to give some group of terrorists on Tuesday, the fliers, and the two held a administrator, who wished to re- Fr. Michael Graham, S.J. were go- money to Student Government March 31, preventing them from private meeting in Smith’s of- main anonymous because the new ing to diversify their lotto games Association so president Craig launching an attack against the fice to plan their handling of the policy has not been made public, and were looking into playing the Scanlon can start giving out student body. situation. said he stays up in his office with Powerball. bailouts. According to Couch, the terror- The exact details of the meet- a bucket of scratch offs from the “I’m not so good at picking “It’s a good thing I don’t have ist cell was attempting to smuggle ing are off the record, but people local United Dairy Farmers, and a random numbers,” said the offi- some sort of gambling addiction,” a keg on campus and to provide near the office reported that she few pennies and scratch the night cial. He says that he is partial to said the official. “Although if I free alcohol to students, with the heard a great deal of “cackling away. the numbers 18, 31, 12, 7, 45 and have to keep this up much longer, intention of getting them to drink laughter.” Though some attempts are fu- 8. “Mike though, he has a knack my wife and I might have to go and possibly even get drunk. Over the past few years, secu- tile, one scratch off has resulted in for them.” stay at Argosy for a weekend.” “I cannot believe the malicious rity against such terrorist attacks audacity that these individuals has been heightened, resulting in possessed and their blatant disre- several reprimands. gard for human life,” Couch said. “Tuesday’s raid raises the Briefs “They fully intended to get stakes and rules of engagement students drunk. Among their sup- to a completely different level,” Former Editor-in-Chief plies, we found Sharpies, clearly Couch said. “We’re finally going VigilPatrick for Slain Stevenson Jesuits hasof El taken indicating that they planned to after these monsters, and making Salvadora job working with conser- draw phalluses on students who a strong statement that we will not When: 9 p.m. vative talk show host Rush passed out—and students would tolerate their threats.” Where: Bellarmine Chapel Limbaugh in New York City. only pass out if they got drunk Smith also seems pleased with first.” the developments, and his office This Stevenson is the 19th will anniversary serve of as The terrorists, whose names is finalizing a master list of poten- theLimbaugh’s massacre of personal six Jesuits, stylist, their have been withheld, deny the ac- tial terrorists on campus. To date, co-workerchoosing a and different her daughter sweater vest on cusations that they wished to get roughly 90 percent of the student Nov.for Limbaugh 16, 1989 daily. by members of students drunk, saying in an offi- body is considered a potential the SalvadoranStevenson also army, will many serve who as cial statement, “We simply wanted threat, with about 25 percent la- were trained at the School of the a matchmaker for three-times Turtle-panda runs amok watching TV when the turtle- to provide students who were of beled as “Clear Terrorist/Alcohol Americas.divorced Come Limbaugh. to reflect “Lauraand pay panda rammed through the wall age with the opportunity to enjoy Lover.” tributeIngraham to those would who be sacrificed a good The elusive turtle-panda caused to my apartment, knocking the alcohol responsibly.” “The words are basically inter- theirmatch lives for for Rush.others. The two of mass destruction on campus stove out of the wall and crushing “The Sharpies were going to be changeable,” Smith said. them together would be a dy- Sunday, March 29. The creature the couch,” said Junior Matthew used to mark “Xs” on the hands With the list, Smith and Couch namic conservative force.” found its way into the Commons, Wrist. of underage students to keep hope to be able to make more In addition, this will offer where it used its strength to knock Physical Plant believes that them from getting alcohol.” raids. “We’re assembling a sting Stevenson a chance to share down all the thin walls of the turtle-panda emerged from a Couch was not swayed by the team,” Couch said. his conservative economic apartments, destroying 12 rooms manhole cover at the Ledgewood statement. “You can’t trust terror- “I will continue to do every- views against the bailout in before Animal Control was able Avenue construction site. A crew ists. These scumbags are clearly thing in my power to protect stu- Ann Coulter’s next book, “How to trap it and return it to a holding will be sent down the tunnel to guilty,” he said. dents from these terrorists and Liberals are Creating a Soviet cell at the Cincinnati Zoo. investigate the swampy sewer Smith said he knew that some- their alcohol,” Smith said from his Satellite.” “I was sitting in my room home. thing was fishy when he saw ad- uncomfortably-raised office chair. Xavier Repository-Guardian Terrible Thoughts&Idiotic Ideas April 1, 2009 A3 Xavier Repository-Guardian —EXPIRED EXPERTS TALK— Copyright 2009 Circulation 1 with Katherine Monasterio the Editor-in-MisChief John LaFollette “Same question: What do YOU hope to find in your Easter basket?” the Emotional One Emily Hoferer the Nerdy One Amy Windhorst the Loud One Katie Rosenbaum the Moral One Darren LaCour the One Whom We Take Seriously Doug Tifft the Quiet One Stephanie Metz the Beautiful Egotistical One Andrew Chestnut the Quick One Madeline LaFave the Sexy Amoral Sexy Amoral One Mustachio the One Who Gets to Leave Early Katherine Monasterio Abraham Lincoln Winston Churchill Plato Eleanor Roosevelt the Absolutely Terrifying One Jake the Bunny 16th U.S. President Former English Prime Minister Ancient Philosopher Former First Lady the Responsible One Kelly Shaw “Malice toward “I like pigs. Pigs “The food of the “Speed. Hot, That Guy Patrick Larkin none, and charity treat us as equals.” soul.” nasty, badass for all.” speed.” EDITORIAL | THE NEWSWIRE Get rid of the Negative Nancies We don’t know about you guys, but we think our counterparts at the Xavier Newswire are a big bunch of Debbie Downers. They are always reporting and criticizing the school because of sil- ly things such as a hiring freeze, budget cuts and those kind souls at Chartwells. They are obviously not reporting on the real news. Terrorist plots are way cooler than any Structural Review Task Force, which is photos from Google image search probably just a fancy name for a bunch of people who get together to Thomas Jefferson St. Francis Xavier John Locke William Adama 3rd U.S. President The Man Enlightenment Philosopher Admiral, Battlestar Galactica have gin and tonics and play bridge. And they’re so critical of Student Government Association. “A Bill of Rights.” “I wish the university “A state of equal- “A hard-rolled six.” Sometimes, it’s a bit much to stomach. They really should be nice to students would work ity, wherein all the as hard at converting power and jurisdic- those guys (and gals). They have to get up that much earlier to iron these people as they tion is reciprocal.” their fancy dress pants in the morning, and they have done good things! do at their books.” Frankly, at the Repository-Guardian, we like to ride the shuttle around Xavier. Of course, then you will discover you need her. Speaking of shuttles, we think that it would be cool if SGA used the the that there are other women who I am sorry you cannot make money from their budget to buy a space shuttle. ASK want your manliness, and so the the sex. Good luck. The Newswire is also kind of mean towards Chartwells. I mean, the ser- best thing is to make the many vice at the pub is so stellar, we don’t know why they are complaining. ‘STACHE girlfriends. Maybe they like to do Dear Mustachio, They seem like the kind of people who would dislike Campus Police with the sex at the same time! My campus newspaper frequently because of their parking tickets or because they mess up all the fun. publishes columns by a certain individual They should really just be nice. Newspapers are propoganda, right? mustachio Dear Mustachio, that are highly insulting to me and other If there is any population on Xavier’s campus they should target, it’s Dear Mustachio, I have read a few of your works, and business majors. Physical Plant. Not only are the flowers extra stinky this year, but they There’s this girl, and she means I must say I am rather appalled. Your How do I are also really lazy. But the Newswire is always singing their praises. The everything to me. I’ve taken her out a behavior is repulsive and your treatment cope with and Repository-Guardian just doesn’t get it. few times, but she says she just wants of women is surely illegal. How do you get back at And also, while we are thinking about it, the students should not re- to be friends. How can I win her over live with yourself? such a cruel, ally care about Norwood. Live in your bubble, Xavier students. Being and make her mine? Flowers, chocolates, Steaming Somewhere a r r o g a n t active citizens is overrated; you do not get to sleep as much. Party hard expensive dinners, sappy love notes, can- individual? because you might as well. And if you don’t get away with hosting a dygrams, romantic gondola rides, sky- Dear Steaming, M i f f e d raging, Playboy-themed party then at least it’s a good story down the writing and billboards have so far proved I know you write these words Management road. ineffective. Help! because Mustachio did not make Major The Newswire staff is such a clique too. No one likes them. One Creepy Dude the sex with you. If you give One thing is for sure though, they really like to report on the bas- Mustachio the address, he will Dear Miffed, ketball team. Dear Creepy Dude, come and make the sex. The predicament for you is On the Web: http://www.mcsweeneys.net We are not so different, you and But maybe you are not the quite the problem, but the advice I. The techniques you make for The Xavier Repository-Guardian has now been and stories are complete fabrications. We really woman! Maybe, you are the man! is the simple kind: Get the job. published twice! Two whole times! Of course, in both tried to make up ridiculous things no one could using I once did. But then I dis- If you are the man, are you This writer man probably has no instances, as an April Fool’s joke. None of the stories believe. Of course, with the crowd we’re dealing covered that the woman wants the are to be taken seriously, though if you would like, I’m with, someone’s bound to believe them... jealous of the mustache? He can- idea what the future holds for certain that you could. It’s been done often enough Subscription rates are $300 per year or $1,500 per sex. You need to put your manli- not help the love of the ladies, or him, and not even what he wants by people who have no concept of satire. semester within the USA and are hand-delivered. Props to you for reading this box, by the way. Subscription inquiries should be directed ness upon her, and she will make the ladies’ love for the mustache. the future to hold. So, the advan- Last year’s was pretty hilarious, if I do say so my- to Jenny at 867-5309 (that joke was so good I the screams of joy. She will make But do not try his secrets; they tage is to you. Get the job, then self, and so I’m shooting for the same thing with reused it). this one. Advertising inquiries—seriously? Why? the realization that the manliness only work for Mustachio. Maybe the joke is on him! The statements and opinions of the Xavier There is only one copy of this newspaper, and of you is all she needs, and hap- next time I make the sex, I will tell Ah, who do I kid? You’re Repository-Guardian are not and should not re- YOU ARE HOLDING IT. And we’re totally lying. ally be held by any real people, since all events Dedicated to the memory of Jeff McMurray. piness will be yours for all times. the woman to find you because hopeless. LETTERS ery time I see a sign in the student Yes No Maybe when Edward said, “Hey Bella, I her and would never bite her on Secret Admirer section asking for your number I Love, have a present for you.” purpose. Dear Brad, want to march over there and rip Your Secret Admirer at the Bella was very excited. She Edward whispered, “Bella.” You don’t really know me, but I it to shreds and say ‘NO BRAD. Newswire loved presents! “I love presents!” Bella started to cry. He meant see you all the time on campus and PICK ME. EVERY GIRL ON she cried. “What is it?” so much to her, and he didn’t even on the basketball court. When you CAMPUS THINKS YOU ARE Edward pulled out a small know how beautiful he was. Her get all sweaty, my heart races and CUTE BUT I LIKE YOU THE “Twilight” fan writes golden retriever puppy. “All tears dripped into the puppy’s fur, I just have to tell you how dreamy MOST. PICK ME.’ Dear Newswire, yours.” and it sparkled in the sunlight. She you are or I’ll…I dunno, explode I like you just the way you are, I am a very good amateur Bella gasped. She loved pup- thought Edward’s eyes sparkled or something! like, when you frantically wave writer with a lot of skill but no pies! “Edward! She’s so adorable! even more, filled with longing as I think the fact that you were your arms while playing defense it audience. I am hoping that you Where did you find her?” they regarded her. Mr. Michigan is so cool. It’s like practically makes my heart swoon. can print my latest work in the Edward looked away. His She knew in that instant that you won a beauty pageant, only And I get so excited every time you Newswire, because I put a lot of handsome eyes burned with an they would be happy forever— in basketball. And even though in approach half court with the bas- thought into it and it is really untold story. “That doesn’t mat- the two of them and their puppy your picture the trophy is about ketball in your hand. You should good. ter. What matters is that she’s Bella—despite all the obstacles as big as you (I Google Image shoot from there! You would total- “The Puppy,” by twylyt4evr yours.” they would encounter. Then they searched it), I’m sure that it was ly make it. Every basket you make One day, Bella and Edward “Oh.” Bella scratched the kissed, blazing with passion, burn- just awkward positioning and real- only increases my love for you. [Author’s Note: so hot! omg!] puppy behind the ears, and it ing with love, and it was perfect. ly you are the big guy on the court. I admire your determination were standing at the top of their licked her face. “Did you name THE END. I mean, gosh, you made all those and patience to shoot a hundred favorite tree. Edward flew Bella her yet?” Anyway, I hope you guys at shots and it’s just so studly. shots a day to practice. I just think up there on his back. It was “I did, but you can change it.” the Newswire can find somewhere It really upsets me when I see the world of you, Brad, and I had scary at first but Bella slowly got Edward said. to print this. It really means a you hanging out with those skanky to tell you or I would burst. Do used to it. This particular day on “Tell me!” said Bella. lot to me. Thanks so much, and freshman girls. I mean, what you like me back? Check one of that tree, they were staring mel- Edward looked deeply into her Edward + Bella 4ever! makes them so special? And ev- the boxes below. ancholily off into the distance eyes. Bella could tell that he loved Cassie Goobsnorter | ‘12 A4 April 1, 2009 Paid Advertisement Xavier Newswire
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aLumnI Xavier Newswire Opinions&Editorials April 1, 2009 5 It’s time to fight —STAFFwith Katherine MonasterioTALK— By Darren LaCour Why have only two students “What do YOU hope to find in your Easter basket?” Opinions & Editorials Editor spoken out in outrage on these pages? Instead, you’re more con- Students of Xavier University, I cerned about flaunting the way am incredibly concerned. Nay, ap- you’ve spent students’ money, act- palled. Your disinterest and apathy ing as if you fundraised the bud- regarding the proposed changes at gets you allocate yourself. (N.B. I this institution are quite terrifying. am not trying to discourage any- Perhaps, though, despite all the one from expressing their opin- Newswire press it’s been getting, ion. I do feel, however, that if we you are simply unaware of these care so passionately about those Amy Windhorst Dan Rozier Kathryn Rosenbaum Stephanie Metz potential changes. Let me enumer- other issues, we certainly should Campus News Editor Copy Editor News Editor A&E Editor ate some of them for you: be up in arms about our universi- “Jeebus!” “A 2011 Final Four “A blaze of flory.” “Signed copies of • They will fire many of your ty’s future.) appearance.” all three ‘Twilight’ professors. Why are we willing to accept books. . . or not.” • They will not hire new pro- the reasoning that this is the way fessors to fill vacant jobs. things must be? Boston College, • They will cut your majors. a fellow Jesuit institution, hasn’t • They may even cut your de- enacted a hiring freeze, moving partment entirely. to fill its vacant faculty positions Last time I checked, this is a while avoiding further personnel Jesuit, liberal-arts university, and layoffs, and still they’ve passed a we’re paying for an education. So balanced budget. why are our academic options be- I know that the money for our coming so limited? campus construction comes from Why aren’t we cutting admin- a separate fund, but shouldn’t we istrative positions (besides the really be getting those donors to photos by Katherine Monasterio obvious fact that the people who finance the university we already Maggie Cardosi Andrew Chestnut John LaFollette Madeline LeFave are making the cuts probably have have? Unless, of course, as an ad- Copy Editor Editorial Columnist Editor-in-Chief Head Copy Editor self-preservation in mind)? I’ve ministrator, the whole purpose of “A tuition re- “Another smaller “Gummy worms “A giant jar of been wondering what a Provost is carrying on the construction is to imbursement Easter basket.” and chocolate- crunchy peanut for a while, and why we need so be able to put these massive build- check.” covered gummy butter, because I worms.” gave it up for Lent.” many of them. ing projects on your résumé when I know times are tough, and you abandon a financially-sapped that we must all tighten our meta- Xavier for a larger university phoric belts. Changes are inevita- (Thad Matta syndrome, anyone?). ble, and who knows, this ship may Students, your professors are be sinking. up in arms, and with good rea- Not so honorable But are you just going to go son, since many of their jobs are By Kathryn Rosenbaum However, the major problem to fulfill these requirements. As a down without a fight? in danger. But the administration News Editor with this is that there are a limited public relations major, I can only Aren’t we, as college students, is quite content to let those dogs number of honors sections of remember the department offer- supposed to have idealized vi- bark. As I chose and registered for classes, which limits the variety of ing one honors-level class. sions of what our world (and If there’s any hope of stopping classes for my senior year, I have classes that students can take. I’m An ideal program would es- consequently our institution) can this college from abandoning its yet again realized the inconve- not in high school anymore with a tablish honors classes university- be? Why aren’t we spending more liberal arts foundation, it has to nience and frustration that comes strict schedule; I should be able to wide, instead of simply focusing of our time forwarding those come from us, the lifeblood and with being an honors scholar. Yes, have more class options. them in core subjects only. This visions? livelihood of the university. I will have a distinction on my di- For example, all students need would allow students of all ma- Aside from it being scheduled So let’s get mad, and see if the ploma. It’s a great résumé line and to take a Literature and the Moral jors to pursue their interests at a at an odd time and poorly pub- administration will bite the hand will enhance my bachelor’s degree Imagination class. This semester heightened level. licized, why were there only 15 that feeds it. in communication arts. However, there are 17 Lit and the Moral Yes, I realize I signed up for the students at the Structural Review The Scales of Justice might be I would probably have had more sections, many of which have dif- scholars program, knowing that it Task Force’s presentation in a good place to start, since they diverse educational opportunities ferent focuses. However, only two would require me to take a few ex- February? It’s mostly your money, don’t really work. It would be fit- if I was not an honors scholar. of these classes are at the honors tra classes. I do not object to more so you do have a vested interest in ting to put a pile of fake money Yes, in theory an honors pro- level. Thus, this limits the choice work, just the limitations and in- seeing where that money has gone “weighed” against action figures, gram is great. It takes classes to regarding times, professors and conveniences they present, includ- and where the Task Force has de- symbolizing the faculty—that’s the next level to challenge stu- focuses of the classes. ing an 8:30 a.m. class as a senior. cided it should go. how the administration sees it. dents who are devoted to scholar- In essence, I am confined into ship. Furthermore, the professors taking specific classes instead of are engaging and have much to having the same opportunities as offer. non-honors students to pursue classes in a variety of subjects and -Unpaid Advertisement- topics. I may miss the chance to discover an interest or curiosity in order to fulfill an honors social science or honors Ethics Religion Well Wired OMGGGG! and Society requirement. DID YOU SEE THE There is not one easy solution BY ORVILLE D’TOPP DATE? to the problem. Perfectionism is about constant self-criticism; it’s not about success If honors scholars are sup- A perfectionist is not someone who does things per- You must learn to identify and reject the highly negative-bi- posed to be students interested DO YOU KNOW WHAT fectly; a perfectionist is someone who believes he or she ased view associated with your self-critical thinking. In other in learning, the option of letting is supposed to do things perfectly. Perfectionism is a con- words, since we don’t know how to get rid of self-critical THAT MEANS? students take regular classes and dition of constant pain, and self-absorption. Contrary to thinking, you will need to learn to disagree with your own do an extra project or paper to popular opinion, striving for perfection is not productive; negative views of yourself. Claim the right to disagree with make it an honors-level class, may it is destructive. By constantly expecting the impossible of yourself --- and exercise that right often. LET’S HOPE SO. be one way to increase diversity of yourself (perfection), you set yourself up to fail -- over and Instead of seeking perfection, try this: Do the very best classes. over again. you can. Challenge yourself to stretch beyond your current LAUGH IT UP, LADIES Departments are not allowing To be successful you must become both optimistic and level of competence, but do not expect the impossible --- do realistic. This requires that you come to terms with your not expect perfection. Remember this simple plan: When AND GENTS. this option as frequently because of the variance in level of dif- own human imperfection. To pretend that your very real you fall, get up. When you forget, remember. Expect to fall ficulty. However, with the hiring human flaws do not exist is certain self-sabotage, as is think- and forget frequently. ing of yourself as nothing but flaws. Xavier is full of bright students, academic pressures and freeze, this option may be become 04-01-09 In your efforts (imperfect efforts) to recognize that per- high expectations for success. However, contrary to popular more viable. fection is not even one of your choices, you will come face belief, perfection is not required to succeed. The Xavier Furthermore, the honors pro- to face with perfectionism’s energy source: self-criticism. gram is not compatible with many Repository-Guardian majors. In order to create a uni- To learn the difference between a Perfectionist and a Healthy Striver go to Issue 2 versity-wide honors program, de- http://www.xavier.edu/health-couns/Emotional-ColorWheel.cfm partments should have compat- Perfectionism is a state of self-victimization. ible seminars and other classes www.xavier.edu/health-couns/ 6 April 1, 2009 Sports Xavier Newswire BRIEFS XU falls in game of inches A-10 honors XU By Doug TIFFT points and grabbing eight re- freshman MacLean Sports Editor bounds in his final game at Xavier. Freshman Sebastian MacLean Every inch counts. “We felt like we had a good op- earned the A-10 Rookie of the It is an old adage often applied portunity [at halftime], but we week award, his second in a row. to sports to inspire desire. But in missed too many open shots.” MacLean lead the Musketeers at a 60-55 loss to Pittsburgh in the The misfires came after the the Mobile Bay Intercollegiate Sweet Sixteen on Thurs., March Musketeers worked through the on March 22-24. For the three 26, desire was not a problem for Pittsburgh defense, and got looks rounds of play MacLean was 6 Xavier; Derrick Brown’s shoe size inside against Blair, but were un- over par, earning him fourth place was. able to finish. individually. With 1:20 remaining and Xavier “It was a lack of execution,” Junior Kieran Lovelock finished leading 54-52 Brown chased Miller said. “We just missed some in 12th place and the Musketeers down a ball thrown the length point-blank layups that you have placed fourth as a team. of the court by senior forward to make in any game, particularly The golf team will play in the C.J. Anderson, appearing to give this tournament.” Marshall Invitational this com- Xavier a critical possession and While the missed layups hurt ing weekend in Huntington, West the ability to run down the clock. the Musketeers, they were still in Virginia. It was not to be, as Brown’s heel the game in the final seconds. touched the end line as he gath- “We missed layups. So what? ered the ball, giving Pittsburgh We have missed layups before,” Xavier picks up possession of the ball to set up sophomore point guard Dante two, drops three heroics by Levance Fields. Fields Jackson said. “I think the most It was an up-and-down week hit a step-back three point shot, disappointing thing was that we for the Xavier baseball team, fea- caused a turnover and converted were not able to get that rebound, turing two wins and three losses. a transition layin—a stretch that Photo courtesy of GoXavier.com or that defensive stop.” The team continued their pen- gave Pittsburgh the lead and sepa- Junior forward Derrick Brown’s 14 points and nine rebounds helped Xavier Despite the lack of lucky chant for winning games in the rated them from Xavier. to the verge of an upset of top-seeded Pittsburgh on March 26. bounces in their final game, the late innings by defeating Indiana “I thought the shot that were able to build an eight point Blair did not remain quiet, Musketeers still had one of the on March 25 in the 11th inning. Levance Fields hit says it all about halftime lead. The key to holding however, as he broke out for eight most successful seasons in pro- Sophomore Ben Thomas fueled a senior point guard,” Xavier head the Panthers to 29 first-half points points and 14 rebounds after half- gram history. They won a third the victory for the Musketeers, coach Sean Miller said. was containing sophomore center time, contributing to a 9-0 run by straight Atlantic 10 regular season hitting a game tying homerun in For Xavier to be in a position in DeJuan Blair, who scored two the Panthers over the first 6:19 of title, reached a third Sweet Sixteen the bottom of the ninth and then the final moments the Musketeers points and grabbed four rebounds the second half. in six year and won 27 games. hitting a walk-off homerun in the relied heavily on their familiar in the first 20 minutes. The scoring draught for the With only two seniors on 11th. strength of lock-down halfcourt “I tried to play him tough and Musketeers continued, as they the team—Anderson and B.J. The weekend saw a rematch defense. be physical with him to keep him shot 24.1 percent in the second Raymond—the Musketeers look of an early season victory by the The Musketeers held Pittsburgh off of the boards,” said Jason half. to be among the top 10 teams in Musketeers, as they welcomed to 33.8 percent shooting on the Love, the Xavier center who re- “It is disappointing that we the country heading into 2009-10, Rhode Island to Hayden Field for night, including 35.5 percent in ceived the primary assignment on could not finish the game,” and now have the desire to make a three game set. The Rams would the first half when the Musketeers Blair. Anderson said after scoring six up for a lost opportunity. get their revenge, taking the first “It is going to motivate us to do two games of the series, including -Paid Advertisement- much better next year. Guys will an 8-7 loss in 12 innings on March come back this summer hungry 28. and ready to fight,” Jackson said. On Sunday, March 29 the “It is the same situation as when Musketeers avoided the sweep by we got beat two years ago by Ohio defeating URI 6-1, before falling State [on a miraculous three point back on the wrong side of the shot by Ron Lewis]. Hopefully it ledger in a 9-7 loss to No. 22/24 H\f`^jgg`b` is a good omen.” Ohio State. It doesn’t have to be that great Xavier will take on Miami (OH) of an omen; just good enough to April 1 at 3 p.m. and will travel to make up for six inches. La Salle this weekend. tjpm^\m``m Feeling fooled by your lack of XU sports coverage? Check out the Newswire online at xavier.edu/ BVhiZgd[6gih^c:YjXVi^dc newswire, where there is unlimited space to read about XU baseball, golf, track and tennis. AZVYZgh]^e^c -Paid Advertisement- =^\]Zg:YjXVi^dc Emergency Care in Minutes, Not Hours..
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',*:VhiaVcYGdVY 7ZgZV!D=))%&,"'%-- 311 ST R A I G H T ST R E E T • CI N C I N N A T I,OH I O 4 5 2 1 9 NE X T T O HU G H E S HI G H SC H O O L I N CL I F T O N Xavier Newswire Arts&Entertainment April 1, 2009 7 Stuff Players’ ‘Angels’ soared CSO hits high note BY Des Dale BY Meghan Berneking harmony while creating musical Contributing Writer Asst. Campus News Editor interaction with the rest of the Xavier “Millenium Approaches,” If you have not yet seen the percussionists and orchestra. After part one of two of “Angels in Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra intermission, the orchestra per- People America,” was presented by (CSO), you are missing out on formed Ludwig van Beethoven’s the Xavier Players last week at an extraordinary Cincinnati ex- famous “Fifth Symphony.” the Gallagher Student Center perience.The CSO’s most recent Though I questioned if Gaffigan Like Theatre. concert, last weekend, March 27- would be able to match Järvi’s skill Thinking their Though the Players’ selection 28, featured James Gaffigan filling and intensity after the first half, he major is the best coincides with Xavier’s Queer music director Paavo Järvi’s shoes quickly proved me wrong. Week, it is apparent that the play as conductor, proving why the Conducting without a score, is not only about the gay com- CSO is considered to be one of Gaffigan jumped on his toes and munity, but humanity in general. the best symphony orchestras in waved his arms so violently I wor- Nevertheless, the play went beyond the country. ried that he might fall off of his Newswire photo by Jessica Thimons stand. The result, however, was the tangible in favor of capturing The cast of “Angels in America: Millenium Approaches.” The first half of the concert the sublime. Dialogue and dream included the world premiere of a brilliant performance in which sequences revealed the true magic As Roy Cohn, freshman Nate dic relief. The Rabbi, freshman- “..and symphonies of deepen- all of the individual instruments of the human subconscious. Fischer may have done an even Jonathan Hibbs, had an excellent ing light...expanding...ever cav- could be heard at all the right The play’s basic theme is relat- better job than Pacino represent- accent, but it was so heavy that ernous,” composed by Jeffrey times. able, as good people struggle with ing a character who acts in an when combined with fast-paced Mumford, who was present and After the first movement the mortality and the imperfections evil manner, but it is not an evil dialogue it rendered him nearly made a brief appearance onstage audience could not help but ap- and prejudices of the world. There person. impossible to understand. during the applause. plaud, at which point Gaffigan are no clearly defined antagonists Fischer’s sense of humor and Director Cathy Springfield did The piece sounded fairly typical turned around and joked, “And or protagonists because the char- timing allowed the viewer to look an impeccable job of casting the of modern music. With no par- there’s more, too!” acters at times fiddled with hero- at Cohn in a more favorable light. right people, cutting down this ticular sense of direction the piece The famous rhythm that opens ism and villainy. Freshman Nick Tsangaris and overly lengthy play, and creating remained anchored by underly- the first movement could be heard Excellent writing demands sophomore Kelli Brinker were a flow to what could have been a ing beats and harmonies. Within throughout the piece, always crop- excellent acting, and playwright spot-on as Joe and Harper Pitt. chaotic show. the program notes, the composer ping up when least expected and Tony Kushner’s work contains The differences in their sup- “Angels in America” is at its described the piece in terms of reminding the audience of the some of the best dialogue written pressed identities created a rela- best when it depicts the ideology color, instructing the audience to built-up tension created at the be- in the past quarter century. The tionship oozing with drama and of the human mind contrasted listen to the piece, “as if looking ginning. The piece rightfully re- Xavier student cast compared fa- suspense. with a harsh world. “Angels in at an impressionist painting.” ceived several standing ovations. vorably to that of the TV mini- These two characters were America” was at times confus- Following Mumford’s piece The CSO performs down- series of the same name starring like magnets of the same charge, ing and hard to follow, possibly a was Jennifer Higdon’s percussion town at Music Hall, one of the Meryl Streep, Mary-Louise Parker slowly pulling further apart with consequence of shortening such concerto. The piece featured one most magnificent buildings in and Al Pacino. each new revelation. a lengthy, complex play. However, of the CSO’s regular percussion- Cincinnati. Students can buy tick- Senior Preston Gabay as Prior The other minor characters this production was possibly the ists, Colin Currie. Currie’s perfor- ets for $10 the week before or $12 Walter and freshman Justin Hanks were largely good as well. I had best I have ever seen at Xavier. mance was as much a visual expe- the day of the performance. BY Felipe only had a few gripes with their as Louis Ironson dialed up very rience as an auditory one. With Correction: There was an error in the Garcia-Wasnich convincing performances; their acting. Sophomore Brandon Newswire Rating: instruments lined up across the “Angels in America” story in the March relationship felt organic as the Brown’s Mr. Lies and freshman entire stage, Currie practically ran 25th issue of the Newswire. The photo characters’ contrasting personali- Christopher Razor’s Belize both from one to the next, each time was a picture of Christopher Razor and Preston Gabay. ties lit up the stage. sprinkled the drama with come- executing flawless rhythm and -Paid Advertisement-
town hall meeting this monday, april 6 The Challenge Ahead: In Search of a New Energy Economy
The United States is facing a global economic crisis—a crisis with a reach and magnitude like none we have ever confronted. Many, including the new administration, are saying this moment of crisis demands we begin the process of reshaping the foundations of our economy. Key to this process is developing an entirely new energy strategy. Join us for a dialogue with a distinguished panel. These individuals have been thinking about these issues for years and are involved in developing the technologies, the business strategies and new energy sources.
join us featuring April 6, 2009 ray anderson 7:00 p.m.-9:00 p.m. Founder and Chairman, The James and Caroline Duff Interface, Inc. Banquet Center christopher flavin at the Cintas Center President of the Worldwatch Institute finished Xavier University kevin leahy Cincinnati, Ohio in time Managing Director-Climate Policy and Economics for Duke Energy for you to Free and open to the public. watch the For more information, david orr please call 513-745-3922. Paul Sears Distinguished Professor of NCAA finals Environmental Studies and Politics at Oberlin College 8 April 1, 2009 Feature Xavier Newswire The origins of other Schott Hall building names: Named after the Schott foundation, also previously a Jesuit residence James E. Hoff Dining Hall Brockman Hall building. The Schott Foundation James E. Hoff, S.J., is Fr. Graham’s gave the money for the building predecessor. He was the president in 1970. The foundation is named of Xavier from 1991-2000. Hoff’s after Charles and Marge Schott. mark on the university is great, as Though sometimes a controversial shown with the recent dedication of public figure in Cincinnati, Marge the Hoff Academic Quadrangle in Schott was generous with her his name. Hoff’ oversaw one of the donations to Xavier and other University’s largest periods of growth schools in Cincinnati. in the 1990s.
O’Connor Sports Center Named after Fr. Paul O’Connor, S.J., Who was president from 1955-72
Husman Hall Harry J. Husman, local Cincinnati businessman and Xavier alumnus who donated the money for a residence hall.
Kelly Auditorium Named after an important 1923-31 Named after a supporter of the president, Hubert F. Brockman. Brockman University from Detroit. was built in 1953 and has been renovated many times since. William H. Albers Named after the donor for the science building and built in 1929. Albers Elet Hall originally requested anonymity, but Named for John Anthony Elet, First president of Xavier, his name was revealed many years 1840-47. Elet Hall originally served as a residential later. Alter building so the school could house out-of-town The origins of Xavier’sstudents. It was names built in 1924 under the Hall A.B. Dolly and Ralph Cohen Named after direction of President Hubert The name of a Cincinnati foundation F. Brockman, that gave the university money to Archbishop Karl S.J. renovate the old U.S. Shoe property. Alter of Cincinnati. Alter opened in Bellarmine Chapel 1960 and doubled St. Robert Bellarmine, 17th century the classroom Jesuit scholar. space that the By Emily Hoferer/Newswire photos by JessicaUniversity Thimons had at Hinkle Hall the time. Mrs. Mary Hinkle gave the university its first six figure gift of $100,000 in 1919. It was originally an administration building and a home for Jesuits; completed in 1920.
Hailstones Hall Hayden Field Thomas J. Hailstones was appointed Named after a donor J. Page Hayden. It was dedicated in the position of director for Xavier’s his name in 1982. new business administration in Gallagher 1956 and later became dean of the college. Victor Nieporte, S.J. became Student the executive vice president that year Center as well. Named after donor Flynn Hall and Board of Trustee Used to be home to the radio station member Charles WVXU-FM, named after the Jesuit Gallagher who Lawrence J. Flynn, who helped create currently works in the radio station. Denver. Construction began in 1999 at the Williams College of Business behest of a challenge Named after Charles and William made by Gallagher: Williams, who were cofounders of he agreed to match an insurance company. The brothers every donation made gave the university $1 million and the to the center up to $7.5 company itself gave $3 million. million.
Brueggman Center Inside Gallagher Established in 1993 it is named after is Ryan’s Pub. The Jesuit professor Edward Brueggman pub is named in who taught theology courses that honor Stephan Ryan, Edgecliff Hall aimed at a greater understanding for longtime friend and different religions. former roommate of The renovated Alumni Hall was Gallagher while he was named Edgecliff in honor of the at Xavier. Edgecliff College and its graduates. McDonald Library The college was originally Our Named after the Walter A. and Lady of Cincinnati College and George McDonald Foundation, who was an all women’s college that wanted to make a donation to help specialized in the arts, such as higher education. They donated $1 music and social work. million in 1964 and the library was completed in 1967. Classifieds For classified orders and information, call John LaFollette at 513-745-3561 or email him at [email protected] transport our teenage daughter to starting in August. Competitive pay. Available for 2009 school year. 5 Help Wanted and from activities. Must have your If interested, please contact Laura For Rent houses two blocks from campus. 3, Looking for an energetic, fun, car- own car and have excellent driving at 931-0077 or laura.broxterman@ Large 4-6 Bd, hardwood floors, central and 4 full size bedrooms. Large houses, ing college student to care for 2 record. Hours may vary depending gmail.com. Please have references air, dish, off-street parking, laundry, on walk to campus, other student housing children this summer 3 days a week. on activities; about 30 hours/week. available. Norwood nicest street.Call 604-5159 immediately next store. Laundry, fully Montgomery area, experience and car The right person will receive very good for more details. 2bd also available equipped kitchens, plenty of parking, needed. Please email me at hkerr@ pay! References required. Help us grow our Website: Earn easy clean and well equipped. 513-616- cinci.rr.com If interested call 513-872-3829 or $$$ just refer your friends and family 1-2 Bedroom apt available for next 3798 or email [email protected] email [email protected] with your to our Jewelry and Gift Website. For school year across from Financial Aid for information. Professional couple in a northern letter of interest, work history and FREE details email us: RF@Mountain- Office on Dana Ave. Large kitchen, Cincinnati suburb is looking for a references. LionGifts.com or call: 1-888-858- off street parking, many extras. Call Fantastic Efficiencies up to 2-3 fun, dependable and flexible person 6544 ex. 199 513-616-5244 or email bje3210w@ bedroom apartments. Right across to help out over summer break. We 2005 B.S. and M.Ed. grads ex- aol.com. Discounted for this summer the street from Xavier. Summer or need someone to hang with and help pecting twins in June. Looking for rental. school year. BEST DEALS IN TOWN. nanny/babysitter 3 days/week [email protected]