When Mom Goes to Prison Again, Only This Time for Cassie’S Children
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IN THIS ISSUE: People- Pleasing FOR WOMEN p.2-3 ® Word INSIDE JOURNAL Search p.3 More Recipes! p.4 YOUR SOURCE OF INSPIRATION AND INFORMATION VOLUME 28, NO. 4 FALL 2019 separated her from her kids. Cassie’s mother assumed the role of caregiver once When Mom Goes to Prison again, only this time for Cassie’s children. Fortunately, by Grayson Pope the facility where Cassie was incarcerated was only about hen she was 30 minutes away, so Cassie’s 22, Cassie mother was able to bring her Cluesman children to visit her every fell head over other week. heels in love While in prison, Cassie Wwith a man. To Cassie, their wondered how she would relationship seemed ideal. But make things better for he also sold drugs. herself and her children. One day, she walked out Then she saw a posting of a gas station to find her for the Prison Fellowship car surrounded by police. Academy®, an intensive, “I was so embarrassed,” she biblically based program remembers. She was arrested that takes incarcerated men and charged with delivery and and women through a life manufacturing of narcotics. transformation process. The police had been She applied and was watching her boyfriend for accepted into the program. three months and learned Triest by Glenn Photo that she and her two children Making the most of her time were living with him. They Cassie’s relationship with a man who sold drugs resulted in her arrest and incarceration. “The Prison Fellowship wanted Cassie to testify Separation from her kids was painful, but she found new hope in prison. Academy provides against her boyfriend. She incarcerated women with the tools they need to become didn’t want to see the man they achieved without her. “I didn’t take her to church, not only better parents, but she loved locked up, so she had pictures of my children, Cassie remembers walking better wives, daughters, and “I had said no. and I’m like, ‘Look at all I’m to church with her sister. grandparents,” says Denise A judge sentenced her missing.’ Just thinking about Faith gradually became more Harris, the Prison Fellowship pictures of to four years in a Michigan it now makes me choked up important to Cassie, and she field director in charge of state prison. because I missed their first was baptized at age 15. But that the program. “During the my children, steps,” she says. “I missed faith practically disappeared 12 months in the program, the Painful separation [many of] their first things.” until her incarceration. women grow in community She knew this four-year and I’m like, Cassie knew the pain her Her arrest served as a and together explore ways to sentence meant she wouldn’t children were experiencing in wake-up call that revived her build stronger relationships be with her two kids, who ‘Look at all her absence. Her father had faith. She was determined to with their families and were very young at the time. done time when she was a kid, leave behind any association with God.” I’m missing.’” Cassie recalls being in her cell leaving her mother as her sole with criminal activity. But and realizing all the milestones caregiver. Though her mom prison bars and razor wire still Continued on page 2 prisoner, saying no can be difficult—or downright dangerous. Here are seven 7 Ways to Say No Behind Bars effective, healthy tools you can use to say no if necessary: by Jason Aten HOW TO SAY NO: 1) Know your boundaries aintaining 1) Know your boundaries in advance. your You have to set up boundaries in advance. boundaries ahead of time, so you know can be a 2) Avoid situations where you’ll where you stand when challenge be pressured into things you pressured. It’s harder to say no Mwhen you spend most of your shouldn’t do. if you are unsure about your time in close quarters with 3) Don’t lie or make priorities. Make a list in your people who don’t have your up excuses. mind of the things you aren’t best interests in mind. One of willing to participate in and the most important things you 4) Use “I feel” statements. make a personal commitment can do while inside is learn to 5) Say no, but offer an to stick to it no matter what. say no when someone wants alternative or compromise. Also, be consistent in your you to do something that isn’t personal policy. When you say good for you. 6) After saying no, watch for guilt. yes to some people and no Whether you are being to others, you open yourself pressured to cover for 7) If you decide to say yes, do to conflict. someone else or asked to it on your terms. give up something to another Images by drbimages/Getty Photo Continued on page 2 INSIDE JOURNAL | Fall 2019 1 bars. There will be times when Ways to Say No saying no has consequences, Continued from page 1 Stop People-Pleasing like not being accepted. But by Annie Goebel going to pass you a joint.” I it’s more important to chase 2) Avoid situations where guys who wanted to call quickly told her, “No, thank after God than to chase after you’ll be pressured into home if they could give hortly after I you. I’m not using drugs popularity. The Bible says, “You things you shouldn’t do. me commissary and use arrived in prison, anymore because of my new can enter God’s Kingdom only Once you’ve decided my phone card. It wasn’t the cheerful life as a follower of Jesus.” through the narrow gate. The where your “line in the sand” something I was willing to chirping of birds She proceeded to let me know highway to hell is broad, and is, stay away from it. It’s not do, but instead of simply outside my refusing her “gift” was a slam, its gate is wide for the many hard to stay out of trouble saying no, I’d say, “I don’t windowS seemed to mock my and if I wasn’t a friend, I was who choose that way. But the unless you’re looking for it. feel comfortable with that, separation from the ones I an enemy. gateway to life is very narrow Be smart about the people but what I am willing to do is loved. Having spent time in a When I was let out into the and the road is difficult” you associate with, and stay pass along a message.” juvenile detention home and community room, I saw the (Matthew 7:13-14). away from the ones who many jails, I was no stranger looks from women who knew In this Inside Journal, learn are likely to pressure you to 6) After saying no, watch to life behind bars. But this of my “gift refusal” and now tips for saying no in prison cross your boundaries. for guilt. was my first time in an adult also considered me an enemy. (page 1), read more about how If you’ve said no prison. I felt so alone. A few of them sent remarks to acknowledge your sins and 3) Don’t lie or make respectfully, for the right Then I heard a soft tapping. my way, and I had to watch find your narrow gate (page up excuses. reasons, there’s no reason Where is that coming from? I my back during movement for 3), and check out the free Never lie to anyone in you should feel guilty. There wondered. I followed the sound a while. But I stood my ground offer for an Inside Journal prison. That doesn’t mean were people I would have to the baseboard heater. As on saying no to requests that Life Recovery Bible (page 3) you have to always tell every liked to have helped while I got down low and listened would be bad for me. to help you say yes to Jesus. detail of the truth; sometimes behind bars, but couldn’t closer, I heard a woman’s When I finally went to And finally, check out more the best idea is to simply because it would have voice coming through the hole chapel, I met other women recipes you can make yourself say no or say nothing at crossed the boundaries I where the heater extended following Jesus. They using commissary items all. But don’t give a reason set. When I knew that I had into the next cell. welcomed me with the right (page 4). We hope you enjoy you can’t do something if it made the right choice for “Hey, welcome. Wanna be kind of friendship, and they this edition! isn’t true. Nothing causes the right reasons, I would friends?” she asked. “Sure,” I didn’t pressure me into doing more problems than lying to simply trust that God would replied. “I have a welcome gift things that would go against Annie Goebel is the director another prisoner and having take care of the rest, and I’d for you,” she said. “Thanks,” my values. of programs and special her find out. Be honest about sleep just fine. I said. Then she said, “Put It’s important to know when events for women at why you have to say no, and your hand right up close. I am to say no, especially behind Prison Fellowship. n you’ll often earn respect for 7) If you decide to say sticking to your values.