Vol. 3, Issue 6, Summer 2012-2013

Wanaka Bowling Club ISLAND CABARET hawea NYE al fresco play being green diamond geezers flash fiction SUMMER LOVIN’ SOUTHERN FLING Vol. 3, Issue 6, Summer 2012-2013

4 concept 32 on screen Gone Troppo Bikes on film 6 environment 34 little ones Eco adventures Playground guide 8 on track 35 on the page Spec-trackular! Book review 10 on location 36 degustation Diamond geezers Summer BBQ 11 on the island 38 destinations Ruby Island cabaret Invercargill 12 fashion 40 flash fiction Love all Short short stories 18 directions 42 inspiration map Local poetry 19 on / off What’s cool, what’s not The contents of On Magazine are copyright and may not be reproduced 20 what’s on in any form without written Gig guide permission. Printed on FSC paper by Taieri Print, Dunedin. 26 on location To advertise with On Magazine Hawea Happening contact us on: 022 0188 314 or (03) 443 4629. 28 on the beat [email protected] Rave rising www.onmag.co.nz 30on foot Follow us on A peek at Mt Roy Facebook & Twitter 31 on location COVER: Ruby Island Chop Shop Image by Simon Darby Photo: Jeremy Town

onmagazine  Summer. It turns me upside down. Summer, summer, summer – like a merry-go-round. The Cars were right. Summer is magic. Wanaka’s population surges during the warmer months – for good reason. For the weeks either side of Christmas and New Year, New Water Bar is a fully licensed restaurant with fantastic bar facilities and located Zealand shuts up shop and heads for a sunny spot beside a body of water. A river, lake or piece of coast we like to call our second home. And half the population seems to come right on the lake front in Wanaka. We offer value for money and service with a to Wanaka. It’s the time of the great Out Of Office AutoReply. If you for some strange smile from our friendly staff to ensure your visit is a memorable one. reason send a business-related email during this summer-soaking fortnight, it’s most likely to ping back with something like Thank you for getting in touch. I’m away from the office on leave so the only work I’m doing is on my tan. If you are really desperate to communicate with someone, then get in touch with some poor intern or underling ALL MEALS ARE because I’m sifting sand through my toes and rubbing sunscreen on my loved one/s. What are you even up to; sending an email, you doofus? Go outside, crank up $20 OR UNDER! your BBQ, run through the sprinkler, live a little. It’s officially ‘tools down’. I will endeavour to reply to your email in the New Year, ‘but til then I’ve gone Whether you are after a full dining experience, a casual brunch or lunch, or a troppo. You should too. lively late night entertainment venue, Water Bar can make your visit a fantastic This is corporate communiqué at its best. The last thing I’m planning before embracing my Wanaka summer holiday is crafting that snappy AutoReply. Something experience! We’re open 7 days a week from 8:00 a.m. till 2:30 a.m! along the lines of I’m here, it’s awesome, best wishes for 2013. Then the fun begins. I’ve got a bucket list of Wanaka must-dos for this season: Jump off the wharf, go wakeboarding, glamping, tramping, swimming and fishing. Play golf, tennis, backyard Simply bring in your copy of ON magazine cricket and lawn bowls. Eat hot chips under the willows. Picnic. Lose the shoes. Meanwhile my instant reply can tell others what they’re missing. Because although this for these 3 great offers... is gloating just a teeny bit, it’s all in the interest of promoting Work/Life balance. And just now, Summer = Life. Work can wait. Let’s go troppo. ANNABEL WILSON 1 2 3 magazine FREE TAP BEER Editor Deputy Editor Design Publicity 1 FREE KIDS MAIN Annabel Wilson Laura Williamson Bridget Hall Juliane Bray OR HOUSE WINE 2 FOR 1 WHEN AN [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] OR NON ALCOHOLIC ADULT MAIN IS Contributing Writers: Alex Kerr, Simon King, Christopher Horan, Libby Paulin, MAL, DRINK WITH ANY COFFEE Sarah Wadsworth PURCHASED Contributing Photographers: Simon Darby, Zed (Zeph) Wadsworth, WANAKA.TV, FOOD PURCHASE Jeremy Town, Nina Henderson

Be part of On Magazine... Terms & Conditions – Only one offer per person per visit, not to be used in conjunction with any other promotional offer. 1 Send us your photos, 2 Join our 3 Send us an email stories or art. Best submissions online community. with your thoughts or 145 Ardmore Street, Wanaka, (03) 443-4345 will be published online onmag.co.nz suggestions. or in the mag. Twitter, Facebook [email protected] www.waterbarwanaka.co.nz

 onmagazine

water bar full page ad (concept)1 1 12/11/12 8:06:59 PM mainland since 1920 and liberated back on here in 2004. This is now the only place they can be seen in the wild in any numbers (100- 150 plus) on the mainland. Hopelessly nosey, sadly they have no street sense with predators, and will walk up to them, to their demise. Photos: Supplied Can you explain the “island on a lake on an island on a lake” thing? It’s very cool. Wanaka is the most amazing lake. Just north of the island, it is 311 metres deep (below sea level), Wally Weka checks the map then, during the ice ages, ice was forced uphill 500 metres right over the top of the island, somehow leaving a gouged-out lake up 150 metres on top of Mou Waho Island. And then there are islands in that lake! It is a unique phenomenon, found nowhere else in the Southern Lakes. What’s your favourite local walk? It has to be Rob Roy Glacier Trek. I have been up Q&A there guiding long enough to say that the valley geologically and ice-wise has changed amazingly in the last 25 years; a snapshot of geological ECO WANAKA ADVENTURES Island Arethusa Wahu Pool on top of Mou time. It is always different. Trek-leading in the Annapurnas and Everest region, it would take The On girls caught up with Chris Riley, the co-owner of Eco Wanaka Adventures. us two weeks to see icefall action like that, not He and his guides take their clients hiking, lake cruising, heli hiking and fishing, and two hours! word around town is they are the local authority on the region’s secret spots. If you could choose anyone from history to take on a heli hike, who would it be and why? So, Chris, we’re intrigued by both the “Eco” Have you had any particularly memorable Ernest Shackleton, after wintering over two years and “Adventures” part of your name. Can you clients? in a row in gruesome conditions in Antarctica, tell us a little bit about what you do? One man wanted “The Big Day Out”, Wanaka then saving all his men. I think I would shout him Eco Wanaka offers lake, island and mountain style. This consisted of: drive Wanaka to a single malt as well! adventures with a difference: informative, Makarora, fly Siberia Valley, walk to Lake Rob Roy Glacier walk flexible, fun eco tours and treks with the amazing Crucible, swim in the lake (requested!) pushing Wanaka secrets revealed. For example, the Rob the icebergs out of the way, walk back to airstrip, Roy Glacier Trek gets well off the beaten tracks. fly scenic back to Makarora, drive back to GET PERSONAL WITH Lake Cruise & And on the “eco” side of it, our clients can “give Wanaka to finish with a beer with his wife (who Island Nature Walk... back” by planting a native tree on Mou Waho refused to stay in a hut overnight), all in one day! NATURE ON OUR... Island on every Lake Cruise & Island Nature He was lots of fun, and it was a really cool tailor- Rob Roy Glacier Walk trip - a mutually beneficial agreement with made experience. Guided Trek Alpine Lakes Heli Hike DOC that leaves the island in better condition Your “Lake Cruise and Island Walk” trip takes than we arrived, every time. visitors to Mou Wahu Island Nature Reserve. Wanaka Nature Encounter (Cruise/Walk/4WD) How long has ECO Wanaka Adventures been What sort of flora and fauna make the island Boat Fishing running? their home? We have been running for six years now. Our This introduced-predator-free island is alive with P- 443 2869 local guides all have had many years’ experience birdlife, including the New Zealand pigeon, tui, Free - 0800 926 326 prior to this, and, personally, I have been guiding bellbird, New Zealand falcon, morepork and, here since 1983! of course, the flightless buff weka, extinct on E- [email protected] W - www.ecowanaka.co.nz  onmagazine

Eco Wanaka (third pg ad with QR)1 1 11/11/12 12:55:01 PM * CREEK TRACK *

Bring this in on your next The Newcastle Track visit to Basecamp with Clip ‘n Climb and go into the draw for a 10 VISIT PASS* Images: UCTT VbaW\g\bafTcc_l n Tr ZI acks we Trustr Luggate Creek Bridge will soon grow by another 12 kms, with the On Magazine meets the folk behind Wanaka’s spec-trackular trail network: the Newcastle Track due to open in December. Upper Clutha Tracks Trust. Starting from the Hawea Swing Bridge, this When it comes to tracks, cyclists and walkers Trust. The trust facilitates both the funding and trail offers an off-road loop between Albert in Wanaka are spoiled for choice. Along with construction of new trails, and they’re doing a Town to Luggate, up one bank of the Clutha local classics such as the Outlet Track, new trails fine job. and back along the other. Not bad - just two have sprung up at an impressive rate recently, “The concept was to create a community- years ago the only way to see this part of the with the Hawea River Track from Albert Town led process for track building,” says UCTT Clutha was from a boat. to Hawea, the Upper Clutha Track to Luggate, Chairman Tim Dennis. He explains that To help these guys keep making tracks, the Gladstone Track at Hawea and the Glendhu a charitable trust, as opposed to DOC or financial donations can be made online at Bay Track all completed in the past four years. Council, for example, can access multiple www.uppercluthatrackstrust.org.nz. Or, if By Christmas there will be one more. finding sources. More importantly, a trust is you’d rather help in other ways, says Tim, 9beUbb^\aZfc_XTfXVT__ The new tracks are all thanks to the Upper something locals can feel a part of. contact the Trust directly. “We take everything #&''&$$$# Clutha Tracks Trusts (UCTT), formed in Since its inception, the Trust has built more from cattle stops to gravel. Every bit helps!” 2006 as a local answer to the Wakatipu Trails than 50 kms of track in the Wanaka area. This LAURA WILLIAMSON jjj!UTfXVT`cjTaT^T!Vb!am (#6TeWebaTIT__XlEbTW  onmagazine

basecamp half page vertical.indd1 1 2/11/12 2:54:39 PM q Life’s a Cabaret Flapper alert! This summer marks the return of a legend: the Ruby Island Cabaret. More than 80 years ago, between 1928 and The Cabaret will take place on the original A Gem of a Lifestyle 1932, Ruby Island was home to a Saturday dance floor at the top of the island. A stage is to night cabaret. Revellers took to the Makarora be built on the original kitchen site where an 8- IN HAWEA beech floor, dancing to jazz, ragtime, blues and piece ragtime band will entertain the first guests Dixieland, while, according to rumour, a lookout at a public event on the island since 1932. A There’s something precious about life in Hawea, and for the team behind 1791 back on shore kept watch for the local constable. traditional (but funked-up) café/bar will operate Diamonds, it’s proving to be a real gem of a place to work. On February 3, 200 people will get to at the site and an audio-visual area will offer experience the magic of this bygone era with the historical insights. Richard Prout and Alice Herald, both Diamonds website showcases over 100 of return of the Ruby Island Cabaret. Lake Wanaka LWSI is keen to hear from anyone who has originally from the UK, are the co-founders Alice’s beautiful designs, with a signature SouNZ Inc. (which runs Rippon Festivals and recollections of Ruby Island, especially memories of 1791 Diamonds, specialising in the online collection coming soon. If there are Sounz Forza Workshops) has been granted the which date prior to 1950. retail of exquisitely-crafted diamonds. disadvantages to running an international opportunity to recreate these 1920s parties, with Tickets are on sale December 10 and are limited Richard brings a degree in Computing and 20 business from small-town New Zealand, all profits going to Ruby Island Trust. to 200, with live music and boat travel included. years’ business experience to the company, while the 1791 Diamonds team aren’t aware of Alice has a BA Honours Degree in Jewellery. them. What is obvious is that Alice’s designs But it was a love of the outdoors and an active are inspired by the spectacular natural lifestyle which brought them both to New environment in which she lives and works. Zealand. Alice is also trained in sports therapy, A sliver of that view from the Hawea dam an area she was working in when she and which first stopped the Prout family in their husband Jon came here in 2004. Richard and tracks ends up in the rings that are sent wife Jenny had also moved to Hawea following around the world. six months spent travelling with their two young ALEX KERR www.facebook.com/LakeWanakaSounz daughters. For Richard, seeing the view from Alex is a writer and editor based in Wanaka. Read twitter.com/ripponfestival the Hawea dam, and meeting the people of the more of her work at wordproof.wordpress.com. [email protected] local community, was life-changing, inspiring a permanent move from the UK. It was at a fitness group taken by Alice that the two first met. They got talking and Richard’s keen business senses pricked Emma for Beauty up. He was operating a boutique software Skin, body, spa and well being .... company, which had been buying shares in a US online engagement ring company. Richard was convinced he could make a better website, he just needed someone to ST TROPEZ SPRAY TANNING develop the “product” side of the company. AIRBRUSH MAKEUP “And that’s where I came in!” explains Alice. Fast forward to 2012 and a Google search for ‘diamond engagement rings’ will put 1791 Diamonds top of the list. The 1791

10 onmagazine Alice Herald 03 443 6392 027 427 1024 www.emmaforbeauty.co.nz

q q q q q q q q 39 HELWICK ST

Leggingsfro from $29

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T’shirtsfro from $29 Slipsfro from $29

C. Insight tank, Ketz-Ke skirt. L. Analog tank and shorts. Feminine fashion Photographer: Simon Darby | Models: Connie and Lewis | Fashion: available at Le-Specs generalbags.co.nz for today, tonight All sunnies: | Bags: C. Lower tank, RPM shorts. 12 onmagazine L. RPM tee, Lower shorts. & tomorrow C. Just Add Sugar tank, RPM shorts. L. Federation tank, Lower shorts.

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14 onmagazine A V A I L A B L E N O W A T 12 HELWICK ST, LAKE WANAKA SURF WEAR FOR GUYS

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16 onmagazine Wharf on off

6 3 Skinny Dipping Double Dipping 10 Spelunking Krunking 15 Cliff Wilson St Jandals Jandal Blow Outs 14 Friends with Boats Kooks in boats 5 11 Ruby Island Mururoa Atoll Dirt Biking Dirt Bags A Roll in the Hay Hayfever 1 Sunscreen Sunstroke 4 13 Lawn Bowls Underarm Bowling 8 Photo: Bridget Hall

2 12 7

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1 Base: Fashion 8 Federal Diner: Café 2 Basecamp: Climbing Centre 9 Hawea Hotel: Bar/Restaurant 3 BWM: Snow/Skate 10 Wonder Room: Gift & Design Store 4 Cherry: Fashion 11 Quest: Snow/Skate 5 Chop: Apparel/Headwear/Espresso 12 Rubys: Cinema & Bar 6 Eco Wanaka: Outdoor Adventures 13 Sasanoki: Japanese Cuisine 7 Emma for Beauty: Beauty Salon 14 South Beach: Fashion 15 Water Bar: Dining/Entertainment 18 onmagazine Friday 14 December Friday 28 December For regular gig and event updates, ] Anna van Riel live, Federal Diner ] The Sellouts, Hawea Hotel Garden Bar follow us on Twitter (@onmagwanaka) ] Retro Chic 1st birthday, Lalaland Sunday 30 December Saturday 15 December ] Bannockburn Mountainbike Classic, ] Anna van Riel live, Queenstown Bannockburn Hotel DECEMBER Remarkable Markets Monday 31 December Thursday 20 December ] Summerdaze Festival 2013 starts Saturday 1 December ] ] Hawea New Year’s Carnival, Hawea Hotel ] ON magazine Summer issue launch party Anna van Riel live, 4-6pm, Wanaka ] The Heartleys, Luggate Hotel @ Wanaka Bowling Club, 4 - 6pm. Farmers Market ] New Year’s Eve Countdown, Ardmore St ] Santa Day, fundraiser for St John, Paper Plus Tuesday 25 December ] Glam Rock the New Year, Lalaland ] Exhibition: Wanaka artist Philippa Jones, ] Merry Christmas! Bannockburn Country House, to Dec 14 Sunday 2 December

] Christmas dinner with The Christmas Photo: WANAKA.TV Belles from 5pm, The Creek Cafe Wanaka triathlete Simone Maier ] Cromwell Christmas at the Races, Thursday 6 December Cromwell Racecourse ] Racers Edge Group Ride: Hawea Road ] Gordie Smith live acoustic, following Ride, 7pm, meet at Cemetary Rd (every Thu) Cromwell Races, Luggate Hotel ] The Christmas Belles, 4-6pm, Wanaka ] Sunday sessions, live music 3-8pm, Happy Farmers Market Hour at 5.30pm, The Creek (every Sunday) Friday 7 December Monday 3 December ] Live music every Friday, drink specials & ] Racers Edge Group Rides: easy ride, 6pm bar menu, 6-8pm at Federal Diner (every Monday) ] Exhibition opening: ‘Colour’- Group show Tuesday 4 December with Lukeke, Richard Adams and more, ] Racers Edge Group Rides: mountain bike Gallery 33 ] ride, 6pm (every other Tuesday), women’s Love it Live, live music from 6pm, Urban road ride, 9am (every Tuesday) Grind (every Friday) ] Twisted Tuesdays at Lalaland (every Tue) Saturday 8 December Photo: WANAKA.TV Wednesday 5 December ] Mission WOW Wheels @ Wanaka, ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, women’s MTB clinic, apres bike at Maude intermediate/advanced, 6pm (every Wed) winery, Dec 8-9 ] Deans Bank MTB Time Trial, 6pm, meet ] Cardrona 150 Years of Gold Celebrations, at start of track at stile (every Wednesday) Cardrona Valley, Dec 8-9 Sunday 9 December ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, int/adv, train or race, 9.30am, meet at Vets Corner (every Sunday) Wednesday 12 December ] 12:01am screening of The Hobbit in 3D, Ruby’s Cinema Thursday 13 December

] Anna van Riel and Liv McBride live, WANAKA.TV photo: Wanaka Farmers Market Clothing Boutique & Espresso Bar Photo: Jeremy Town Shop 3, Pembroke Mall. Ph 443-8297 20 onmagazine

chop ad.indd 1 13/11/12 7:04:45 PM Saturday 19 January Grind (every Friday) ] Challenge Wanaka Triathlon Sunday 3 February ] Lake Wanaka Half Triathlon ] Cabaret on Ruby (Ruby Island) Friday 25 January ] Sunday sessions, live music, 3pm, Luggate ] Mitre10 Roy’s Bay Regatta, Wanaka Yacht Hotel (every Sunday) Club, January 25-27 ] Sunday sessions, live music 3-8pm, Happy Saturday 26 January Hour at 5.30pm, The Creek (every Sunday) ] Teddy Bears’ Picnic, Dinosaur Park ] The Big Easy Mountain Bike Race, Pisa Range Photo: WANAKA.TV Photo: WANAKA.TV Wanaka Rodeo, January 2nd 2013 The Black Seeds FEBRUARY intermediate/advanced, 6pm (every JANUARY Wednesday) Friday 1 February ] Deans Bank MTB Time Trial, 6pm, meet Tuesday 1 January ] Jo Little & Jared Smith NZ Summer Tour, at start of track at stile (every Wednesday) ] Federal Diner Twisted Tuesdays at Lalaland (every Tue) Thursday 10 January Wednesday 2 January ] Exhibition: Madeleine Child and Philip ] Racers Edge Group Ride: Hawea Road ] Summerlands 2013 with Dub FX, Tiki Jarvis, Gallery 33 Ride, 7pm, meet at Cemetary Rd (every Thu) ] New Zealand Saloon Car Champs, Central Taane & P-Money, Lake Hawea Hotel ] ] Sir Peter Blake Memorial Trophy - Round Motor Speedway Wanaka Rodeo, Rodeo Grounds next to Photo: Nina Henderson Ruby Island Race 2, Wanaka Yacht Club ] Albert Town Bridge Love it Live, live music from 6pm, Urban Friday 11 January Enjoy Lake Hawea for your New Year! Friday 4 January ] Live music every Friday, drink specials & ] National Cherry Spitting Competition/ bar menu, 6-8pm at Federal Diner Cherry Festival, The Mall, Cromwell Sunday 13 January ] Love it Live, live music from 6pm, Urban Grind (every Friday) ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, Saturday 5 January int/adv, train or race, 9.30am, meet at Vets Corner (every Sunday) ] Wanaka Holiday Gala, Wanaka ] Puzzling World Junior Challenge, Showgrounds Pembroke Park Sunday 6 January Friday 18 January ] Sunday sessions, live music, 3pm, Luggate ] Contact Tri Series, Wanaka lakefront Hotel (every Sunday) ] Sunday sessions, live music 3-8pm, Happy Hour at 5.30pm, The Creek (every Sunday) Monday 7 January ] Racers Edge Group Ride: easy ride, 6pm (every Monday) ] Studio 24 / Cakes of Wanaka Wedding Expo Tuesday 8 January ] Racers Edge Group Rides: mountain bike ride, 6pm (every other Tuesday), women’s road ride, 9am (every Tuesday) Wednesday 9 January

] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, Photo: WANAKA.TV 22 onmagazine Junior Challenge Wanaka Triathlon Thursday 7 March MARCH ] Racers Edge Group Ride: Hawea Road Ride, 7pm, meet at Cemetary Rd (every Thu)

Photo: Bridget Hall Friday 8 March

Photo: Jeremy Town Sunday 3 March ] Sunday sessions, live music, 3pm, Luggate ] Upper Clutha A & P Show, Wanaka Hotel (every Sunday) Showgrounds, March 8-9 ] Sunday sessions, live music 3-8pm, Happy ] Live music every Friday, drink specials & Hour at 5.30pm, The Creek (every Sunday) sophisticated bar menu, 6-8pm at Federal Monday 4 March Diner ] ] Racers Edge Group Ride, easy ride, 6pm Love it Live, live music from 6pm, Urban (every Monday) Grind (every Friday) Tuesday 5 March Saturday 9 March ] ] Racers Edge Group Rides: mountain bike Motatapu R & R Sport Multisport, ride, 6pm (every other Tuesday), women’s Matukituki River road ride, 9am (every Tuesday) Sunday 10 March ] Twisted Tuesdays at Lalaland (every Tue) ] Godzone, 10-16 March Wednesday 6 March ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, int/adv, ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, train or race, 9.30am, meet at Vets Corner Mat Proctor on Lake Wanaka Tiki Taane and family at the Sunshine Festival intermediate/advanced, 6pm (every (every Sunday) Monday 4 February Thursday 14 February Wednesday) Friday 15 March ] Racers Edge Group Ride, easy ride, 6pm ] Valentines Day - share your love, share a ] Deans Bank MTB Time Trial, 6pm, meet at ] Wanaka Embroidery School, Mount (every Monday) cocktail at Lalaland start of track at stile (every Wednesday) Aspiring College, March 15-17 Tuesday 5 February Saturday 16 February ] ] Racers Edge Group Rides: mountain bike Kathmandu Riverrun Trail Series, Race 2, ride, 6pm (every other Tuesday), women’s Cardrona River Mouth Reserve road ride, 9am (every Tuesday) Friday 22 February ] Twisted Tuesdays at Lalaland (every Tue) ] Summer Send Off, Pembroke Park, Feb 22-24 Wednesday 6 February Saturday 23 February ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, ] Pat Benatar, Bachman & Turner and intermediate/advanced, 6pm (every Wed) America, Gibbston Valley Station ] Deans Bank MTB Time Trial, 6pm, meet at start of track at stile (every Wednesday) Thursday 7 February ] Racers Edge Group Ride: Hawea Road Ride, 7pm, meet at Cemetary Rd (every Thu) Friday 8 February ] Live music every Friday, drink specials & bar menu, 6-8pm at Federal Diner Saturday 9 February ] Sunshine Shotover Festival, Queenstown Sunday 10 February ] Racers Edge Group Ride: road ride, int/adv, train or race, 9.30am, meet at Vets Corner (every Sunday) Photo: Simon Darby 24 onmagazine Hawea Happening Celebrating the New Year: It’s all ON in Hawea!

New Year’s Eve at the Hawea Hotel. It’s legendary. Everyone around here has a tale of packing into the outdoor bar area to see The Exponents, Shapeshifter, Shihad or The Datsuns to count in one coming year or another. People travel from far and wide to join in the revelry, Hawea style. This year the boys and girls in Hawea are On deck, among others: Melbourne’s loop- taking New Years to the next level, with maestro Dub FX with Flower Fairy, P-Money, several days of music, entertainment and an acoustic set by Tiki Taane and Wanaka’s very activities for all ages and all persuasions. own SamSam in the gorgeous setting of the It all kicks off with the pre-New-Year Lake Hawea Hotel garden bar. Camping is available, Hawea Garden Bar series. Confirmed already or catch the Summerlands bus from Wanaka. are Cromwell’s The Sellouts, playing December Check out Summerlands on Facebook for 28. For updates on more gigs, keep an eye on tickets and more info: www.facebook.com/ the Hawea Hotel Facebook page. summerlandsnz/info. It will be all go for kids and grown-ups alike on December 31 with the Hawea New Years Carnival set to go off like a pinwheel sparkler on a starless night. The garden bar will be chocka with interactive games, all things bouncy, a vertical bungee, old school bob for apples and carnival games. There will be live entertainment throughout the day, as well as bubbles and face painting. Hungry work, so look out for the all-you-can eat BBQ (Hot dogs! Candy floss!). Local musos Rockhopper will see in the New Year, with special guest Richard Adams of the Nairobi Trio on fiddle and, of course, fireworks. All-inclusive tickets are $120 for a family of four, extra adults $45, extra kids $20, and there will be an after dark price of $20. Take a day to recover, and then rock up on January 2 for Summerlands 2013, a festival of local, national and international sweet beats. From Melbourne to Hawea: Dub FX 26 onmagazine Rave Rising On Magazine’s music muse MAL contemplates the mainstreaming of club music. French dj David Guetta is a polarising figure. Legions of fans who bought into the signature synthetic whump that underpins the record-breaking digital download ‘I Gotta Feeling’ with the Black Eyed Peas are pitted against fiercely underground pioneers who risked and suffered imprisonment participating in massive druggy raves. The latter feel like Guetta got rich by foisting a cheesy version of their culture on unsophisticated consumers. My first remembered exposure to Guetta’s club brand was at the riotous DC10 club in Ibiza in 2001, when some hot wasted chick with a Fuck Me I’m Famous badge gave me a flyer. I didn’t attend the promoted event on that occasion, but subsequently became familiar old boss, club industry raconteur and no with the output of the artist who scored an relation to David. island-wide hit in the form of ‘Just A Little According to news outlet Diario de Ibiza, More Love’, a hugely euphoric club track Sam’s body was found in July covered in jostling for prominence amongst a slew of bruises. I still don’t know what happened. other similarly inclined others. Top 5: Solange ‘Losing You’, Twin Shadow ‘I But over the following decade Dave Can’t Wait’ [Gordon Voidwell Remix], Michel emerged from the peloton, along with the Cleis ‘Mir a Nero’, Caribou ‘Sun’ [Altrice’s nakedly ambitious Swedish House Mafia and Only What You Gave Me Remix], Bieber & constantly shuffling uncle’n’nephew team Big Sean ‘As Long As You Love Me’. LMFAO, to form the triad most hated on due Download or stream the On Mag Deep their immense success and, IMO, refreshing Summer Mix, featuring the above tracks, here: lack of subtlety. www.givingupdrugsforlent.podomatic.com. Perhaps hypocritically Dave even publicly forswore illegal drugs, preferring instead the In Wanaka on January 2 will be rush of a massive injection of cash mainlined Summerlands, featuring Dub FX & Flower into his bank accounts. Fairy, Tiki Taane doing an acoustic set, P- Me? I like how club music is popular, even Money, a Soulside Session with Emma G & as I salute the forerunners who dug the trench MC Tali, K+Lab, Summer Thieves, and our for the money waterfall that followed. very own SamSam! Take for example the late Sam Guetta, my 28 onmagazine * ROY’S PEAK TRACK * chop

shop Hayley shows the cute kidswear at Chop Shop On got together with Chop duo Deano Johnston and Hayley Knights to chat about their Wanaka born and bred brand. ON: We remember when CHOP hats first appeared at the old Boardhouse beside 4 Square on Ardmore St. They were an instant hit. Now every self-respecting Subaru in Wanaka has a CHOP sticker on it. What’s the story behind your brand’s success? Hmmmm, our success? Well CHOP was an Pop in for an espresso... Photo: Simon Darby idea that began on the couch back in 2004 and was initially a small run of beanies gifted Mount Roy is hard to miss. At 1578 metres here without boarding an aeroplane, a bird’s eye to some Wanaka snowboarding crew. Peeps above sea level, it hovers over Wanaka like perspective of the Wanaka township and Lake seemed to identify with the brand and things a friendly sentinel, visible from anywhere Wanaka, and a 365 degree vista that takes in rolled from there. Still stokes us out seeing cars the Matukituki Valley, Mt Aspiring/Tititea and in town. Locals look to its peak in spring plastered with CHOP! the Hawkdun Range. It’s like a giant Grahame to guide them in early season sowing— Sydney painting, except better because it’s real ON: You’ve always supported guru riders never plant your lettuces while there’s still and you’re sitting smack in the middle of it and musos. What’s the criteria for getting snow on Roy. You’ll lose them to frost. The instead of staring at it on a wall. sponsored by CHOP? track is closed October 1 to November 10 There’s a parking lot at the start of the trail, Due to us both having backgrounds in NZ Photos: WANAKA.TV for lambing, so, come summer, locals and located about 6kms along Mt Aspiring Road snowboarding we were already well connected Deano and Kaya visitors are eager to scale its heights once on the left. There is no shade on the track, so with the industry and basically just hooked We’ll be hangin’ tight in Wanaka, working again and take in some of Wanaka’s most take a hat, lots of water, and don’t forget to slip, up friends that were on top of their game. hard and enjoying spending time with our two awesome little girls Kaya & Casey. spectacular views. slap, slop. Downtown Brown and The Sunshine Sound The track zig zags steeply uphill, and it’s an Difficulty:Strenuous. System were the first crew we flowed product ON: What’s ON this season, and what’s honest day’s walk, five to six hours return Views: Panoramic lake and mountain vistas. to in the NZ music scene and through them we OFF? depending on your level of fitness. Bring a hearty Flora: The lower portion of the track takes you met other music industry big hitters who were Caps & Tees are ON. lunch, your camera, and a steely determination through grassy paddocks, which give way to the keen to rock the brand. Beanies & Hoodies are OFF! to make it to the top. When you do, you’ll be alpine tussocks of the Stack Conservation Area ON: What’s the CHOP family up to for Check out the Chop Shop. rewarded with the best views you’ll get around as you climb. summer? Shop 3 Pembroke Mall. 30 onmagazine onmagazine 31 Quicksilver (1986) Kevin Bacon is Jack Casey, a stockbroker whose career ends prematurely after a bad stock call. His solution? Become a bike courier, of course! What follows is a lot of hogwash involving saving a cute Bikes girl called Terry from bike-messenger-exploiting on the drug dealers and something about opening a hot BIG SCREEN dog stand. 2 Seconds (1998) Movies about bikes have been around for a long time. Thomas Edison even shot one in 1899, of a stunt rider doing all sorts of cool tricks, including a It’s got the Mammoth Mountain Kamikaze downhill, it’s got French Canadians, it’s got girl- very competent handlebar spin. This summer sees the release of Premium on-girl action! A wee Canadian gem dating from Rush, starring hottie-du-jour Joseph Gordon-Levitt (The Dark Knight Rises, the early days of downhilling. Looper) as a bike messenger in distress. To get in the mood, why not pick up one of these cycling celluloid classics first? TTHHIISSWWEEEEKKAATTTheRRU UFlyingBBYYSS Scotsman (2006) THURSDAY 8TH MONDAY 12TH THURSDAY 8TH MONDAY 12TH 2:00 The Descendants R 2:00 TheThe Descendants story of Scottish cyclist Graeme Orbee, who 2:00 The Descendants R 2:00 The Descendants 2:30 We Need To talk About Kevin R 2:30 We Need To talk About Kevin R 2:15 Buck: Buck Brannaman 4:05 Moneyball PG-13 2:15 broke Buck: Buck the Brannaman UCI Hour Record (the longest distance ridden in one hour), 4:05 Moneyball PG-13 4:00 We Need To Talk About Kevin 4:40 Vincent Wants to Sea UR 4:00 We Need To Talk About Kevin 4:40 Vincent Wants to Sea UR 4:30 onThe Vow a bike he built himself, incorporating components from an old washing machine. The Bicycle Thief (1948) 6:30 War Horse PG-13 4:30 The Vow 6:30 War Horse PG-13 6:15 Romantics Anonymous 6:45 Buck: Buck Brannaman PG 6:15 Starring Romantics AnonymousJonny Lee Miller, Angelina Jolie’s first, and spunkiest, husband. An unemployed father finally gets work putting up 6:45 Buck: Buck Brannaman PG 6:30 Hugo 3D 8:30 Moneyball 6:30 LAURA Hugo 3D WILLIAMSON 8:30 Moneyball 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin posters because he has a bicycle. Alas, his bike is stolen. 8:30 We Need To talk About Kevin 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 8:30 We Need To talk About Kevin 9:15 Underworld 4: Awakening R 8:45 Underworld 4: Awakening A classic work of Italian neorealism and an early on- 9:15 Underworld 4: Awakening R 8:45 Underworld 4: Awakening screen acknowledgement of a universal truth: it really TUESDAY 13TH FRIDAY 9TH TUESDAY 13TH FRIDAY 9TH 2:00 Moneyball sucks when someone swipes your bike. 1:45 War Horse 2:00 Moneyball 1:45 War Horse 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 4:30 The Descendants 4:25 Underworld 4: Awakening 4:30 The Descendants 4:25 Underworld 4: Awakening 4:30 Buck: Buck Brannaman 4:30 Vincent Wants to Sea Breaking Away (1979) 4:30 Buck: Buck Brannaman 4:30 Vincent Wants to Sea 6:30 Romantics Anonymous UR 6:00 Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy PG 6:30 Romantics Anonymous UR 6:00 Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy PG Small-town boy from Indiana develops obsession with Italian 6:40 Hugo 3D PG 6:30 Romantics Anonymous 6:40 Hugo 3D PG 6:30 Romantics Anonymous 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 8:15 War Horse cycling to the point that he starts speaking Italian and eating 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 8:15 War Horse 8:55 TT3D: Closer to the Edge UR 8:30 We Need To Talk About Kevin sauteed zucchini. The film won the 1979 Academy Award for 8:55 TT3D: Closer to the Edge UR 8:30 We Need To Talk About Kevin SATURDAY 10TH WEDNESDAY 14TH Best Original Screenplay, and features a very young Dennis SATURDAY 10TH WEDNESDAY 14TH 1:45 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:15 The Descendants 1:45 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:15 The Descendants Quaid in very short shorts. 2:00 Star Wars Episode 1: 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 2:00 Star Wars Episode 1: 2:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin The Phantom Menace 3D PG 4:30 Vincent Wants to Sea The Phantom Menace 3D PG 4:30 Vincent Wants to Sea 3:55 Buck: Buck Brannaman 4:45 Underworld 4: Awakening 3:55 Buck: Buck Brannaman 4:45 Underworld 4: Awakening 4:30 Underworld 4: Awakening 4:30 Underworld 4: Awakening 6:30 Hugo 3D 6:15 War Horse 6:30 Hugo 3D 6:15 War Horse 6:40 Romantics Anonymous 6:35 Romantics Anonymous 6:40 Romantics Anonymous BMX Bandits (1983) 6:35 Romantics Anonymous 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 7:15 Vincent Wants To Sea 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 7:15 Vincent Wants To Sea 8:45 The Vow 8:50 Moneyball 8:45 The Vow Three BMX kids get in heaps8:50 Moneyball of trouble with 9:00 We Need To Talk About Kevin a group of homicidal bank robbers.9:00 We It’sNeed never To Talk About Kevin going to be mistaken for Shakespeare,SUNDAY 11TH but there’s SUNDAY 11TH 1:40 Star Wars Episode 1: something endearing about this1:40 Star Australian Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace The Phantom Menace classic and the riding is, like, totally1:45 rad!We Need To Talk About Kevin 1:45 We Need To Talk About Kevin IndulgeIndulge a a little little b byy seeing seeing a a mo movievie a attWWanakanakaa’s’s 4:00 Melancholia 4:00 Melancholia new state-of-the-art Boutique 3D Cinema.With two 4:15 Hugo 3D new state-of-the-art Boutique 3D Cinema.With two 4:15 Hugo 3D 6:30 Buck: Buck Brannaman PH 03 443 6901 luxury cinemas, we play Hollywood blockbusters as 6:30 Buck: Buck Brannaman wPHww .03ruby 443scinem 6901a.co.nz luxury cinemas, we play Hollywood blockbusters as 6:35 The Iron Lady www.rubyscinema.co.nz 6:35 The Iron Lady 50 Cardrona Valley Road well as Art House, Foreign & Festival Films every day. 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin 50 Cardrona Valley Road well as Art House, Foreign & Festival Films every day. 8:15 We Need To Talk About Kevin (Beneath the Lone Star) 8:35 Underworld 4: Awakening (Beneath the Lone Star) OOurur C Cocktailocktail Bar Bar is is open open la lattee. .A Ann opulan opulantt priv privaattee 8:35 Underworld 4: Awakening BookBook youryour seat!seat! screening & party venue, come and see us today. 32 onmagazine screening & party venue, come and see us today. Elemental: Go play outside Central Poems See-saws! Swings! Slides! On Magazine’s round-up of Wanaka’s best playgrounds. by Brian Turner

THE DINoSAUR PARK Wanaka Station Park Brian Turner is best-known as a poet of place, the place being . Like Central, his work is bursting with tussocks, big skies, wind and Corner of Ardmore St and Lakeside Rd Wanaka-Mt Aspiring Road A Wanaka classic, the Dinosaur Park underwent Only one swing set, but acres of grass to run hillocks (so much so a friend of mine once referenced Turner, tongue-in- a $350 000 upgrade in 2004. New swings, a around on, thick bushes for hide-and-seek, cheek-lovingly, in a poem about “f***ing tussocks”). When I read his words “Spiderman” rope tower and all sorts of things epic tree climbing and the ruins of the original I often picture him sitting at the Oturehua Tavern with Grahame Sydney that spin were added, and the dinosaur slide got homestead and farm equipment for clambering and Owen Marshall, raising their glasses to the landscape. a spiffy new coat of paint. The prehistoric plaster action. This park is the most sheltered spot in creature has taken pride of place at the park since town when the Nor’wester gets up, and there’s a It is easy to reduce his work to caricature, to liken it to a series of regional postcards, 1976. The red sliding surface warms up nicely banquet-sized wooden table for summer picnics. but, as Elemental shows, he is much more than that. Turner has selected 150 works on a summer morning, and the plates along his A great spot for outdoor birthday parties. from his 30-year career as a poet, and the collection showcases why he is one of our spine are perfect for hiding behind, especially most beloved writers: visceral imagery, acute observation and thoughts that are as when the grownups are calling home-time. Luggate Park and Domain accessible as they are profound. Main Road, Luggate In ‘Van Morrison in Central Otago’, he nails the un-utterably vast beauty of this Domini Park Luggate has two parks almost directly across area, beauty that still catches the breath Trevathan Lane, off Kings Drive from each other. The newer playground is This playground has swings for both little and located in front of the Luggate Pub. There’s a of those of us who have lived here for big kids, a groovy wooden car, a covered BBQ flying fox, tunnel slide and a scale model of the decades: “the deep / slow surge of the Pick up your copy at area and the best flying fox in the region. Get up nearby Red Bridge. On the other side of the road Paper Plus Wanaka, hills / the cloak of before, the wrench / enough speed, and you’ll flip completely upside- is the Luggate Domain, where delightfully old- 23 Helwick Street of beyond.” And Turner can be funny. In down when you hit the rubber stopper at the end. school climbing frames - paint slightly flaked, ‘Keep It Up’, he captures a snippet of rural steel bars slightly askew - sit next to the cricket conversation anyone who has spent time pitch. Take a picnic; there’s a good few hours’ of fun to be had between the two. leaning on the bar at the Luggate Hotel will recognise. “A farmer asked me,” he Albert Town Playground writes, “if I was working / and added / he Dale Street, Albert Town didn’t mean / writing.” One of the newer parks in the district, here Elemental pairs Turner’s work with the you’ll find a pirate-themed climbing frame photographs of Wanaka’s Gilbert van for little scurvy dogs and a concrete kid-sized Reenen, a union that is pure Central. tunnel through a native-tussock-clad hillock. It makes an excellent echo chamber. Next to the “It’s as if the hills watch us, and ask if we playground, a smooth, concrete path winds its are watching ourselves in them,” Turner way across a grass field - the perfect training explains in his introduction. And in ground for first-time cyclists, skaters and scooter these poems and pictures, we may watch pilots.

Photo: LW ourselves too. LAURA WILLIAMSON LAURA WILLIAMSON Wanaka Station Park

34 onmagazine onmagazine 35 Summer tastes, Japanese food by the lake. Grilled Quinoa Stuffed Peppers with Cheddar and Fresh Coriander q (Vegetarian and Gluten Free) q SASANOKISASANOKI 26 Ardmore St Lake Wanaka These grilled peppers (capsicums) work great as a vegetarian meal or as a side to a Tel: 03 443 6474 summer BBQ. They are healthy while packing a real punch in the flavour department. While perfect for summer, we also have cooked this up in the dead of winter, just to 26 Ardmore St, Lake Wanaka. Tel: 03 443 6474 warm us up a little, and they still deliver! In a good-sized sauté pan, heat oil over medium high heat. Add onion and cook for a couple of minutes before adding carrot, garlic, cumin, oregano, and salt. Sauté for a few minutes, until veggies are soft and aromatic. Add jalapenos, corn, coriander, and tomatoes. Give a good stir and season with salt and pepper. Cook over medium heat for 10-15 minutes. Add cooked grains and stir. Remove from heat and let sit PHOTO: Z (Zeph Wadsworth) (Zeph Z PHOTO: while you prepare the BBQ. Preheat grill to medium high heat (or with charcoal/wood, get it hot, then let it cook down ] 2 T olive oil just a little so it is not blazing), lightly oil and ] 1 red onion, finely chopped scrape clean. While grill is warming, go back ] 1 carrot, finely chopped to the filling the peppers. Sprinkle the inside ] 2 garlic cloves, minced of each pepper with garlic salt and fill peppers ] 1 tsp cumin midway with filling. Place a slice of cheese over ] 2 tsp dried oregano the filling, then fill the remainder of each pepper, ] 1 tsp salt topping again with a final piece of cheese. Top ] 2 tsp pickled jalapeno peppers, finely minced with pepper top. You can skewer the top through ] 1 c corn, preferably fresh but canned works the pepper to keep the lid on, or toothpicks. ] 1/2 cup fresh coriander, finely chopped Place peppers on centre of grill and if you can, Get 5% off coffee when you ] 1 can of crushed tomatoes (or 2 cups of fresh turn off heat directly below peppers. Cover BBQ bring in this coupon. tomatoes, roasted or barbecued) with lid and let cook for 15-20 minutes, checking ] Pinch of garlic salt (or plain salt) mid-way to make sure peppers aren’t charring. Open 7am - 4pm daily for breakfast & lunch ] 3 cups cooked grains (I used a combination Once pepper is lightly grilled and soft, remove and 7am - 10pm Fridays. of brown rice, amaranth, and quinoa) from grill. Let sit five minutes and enjoy! Makes ] Live music every Friday. 6 red capsicums, top removed with attached six stuffed peppers. Available for private parties. core (on bottom side of top) removed BY SARAH WADSWORTH ] www.seasonalalchemist.com 4 ounces cheddar cheese, sliced thin 47 Helwick St / 443 5152 36 onmagazine Inviting Invercargill 3. Buildings! Invercargill boasts a bevy We all have a secret love. Mine is Invercargill. Yes, I’m an Inver-phile. An Inver- of fabulous architecture, a mix of Victorian, maniac. I may even be Inver-sexual. I adore the place. Edwardian and Art Deco. Try to cruise She gets picked on a bit, my Invercargill. Maybe it’s because she’s flat, and because all the crap down Dee Street without looking up. It’s weather that hits New Zealand, the storms that track up the West Coast, the snow to low levels that almost impossible, such is the allure of the hits the east, the wind the howls through the middle, all of it goes through Invercargill first. True. funky facades. But get past the climate, and you’ll find a wee city that charms. And to prove I’m right, here are five things to love about New Zealand’s southernmost city. 4. 1. Food! Dinosaurs! You’ll find everything Actually, they’re tuatara, from kebabs shops to taverns in Invers. which aren’t strictly dinosaurs, but My favourite spot is Zookeepers on Tay they’ve been around for more than Street, the place to be for trippy décor 150 million years. Invercargill’s most and great meals, not to mention the famous Tuatara is Henry. He’s been alter to the Tour of Southland erected hanging out at the tuatarium at the on the wall above the main staircase. Southland Museum since 1970, and And for one of New Zealand’s best is still breeding (currently with his calories-to-dollars-spent ratio, head “soulmate” Mildred, who is in her up the road to Luvlee. Their large-size eighties) at more than 110 years old. roast dinner will feed two for $11.50. Tuatara Zookeepers

2. Bikes! Southlanders love cycling, so much so 5. OP Shops! they spent $11 million on New Zealand’s Invercargill is Op Shop only indoor velodrome at Stadium nirvana. There are close to twenty stores Southland, home to our national track selling pre-loved clothing, furniture, art cycling athletes, who brought home and all manner of knick knacks you never two medals from the London Olympics. knew you needed until you saw them on They also love motorbikes, thanks to sale for a dollar. I once spent three hours Burt Munro. Munro, of course, set in the SaveMart on Tay Street alone. Every the under-1000 cc world record at corner seems to host a Red Cross or a Bonneville in 1967, a feat immortalised Salvation Army shop, and the good news in The World’s Fastest Indian. Munro is it’s all cheap, really cheap, unlike, say, the raced and perfected his machine at Oreti vintage stores on K Road in Auckland. Just Beach, where you can drive your vehicle sayin’. up and down the shoreline and channel Words & Photos LAURA WILLIAMSON your inner Burt.

38 onmagazine Oreti Beach onmagazine 39 Second Runner Up Here at On, we love words, we love stories and, being a pocket-sized ‘zine, we love A DIFFERENT KIND OF CONQUEST brevity. With this in mind, we launched the On Magazine Flash Fiction Contest. We asked writers to submit short stories of no more than 150 words, and convinced columnist Joe Bennett to be the judge. Thanks to everyone who entered, and congrats It comes. A paw on you, extending claws, piercing. It wants your attention. to Simon King who took top place, walking away with a copy of Brian Turner’s new Stroking, stroking. poetry collection, Elemental (reviewed on page 35). Hip pain brings doctor’s visits, pills and apologies. The claws dig in. It’s after the mouse: silence as it creeps across you. First Runner Don’t breathe. Up An ulcer appears. Tests produce an answer. There’s relief of a kind, the kind that Winner bites you, hard. No pounce. COFFEE A STABLE The view from the hospital window does not include the sea nor the giant beech, (A ROMANCE) ARRANGEMENT your companions for forty-eight years. There’s plenty of time for slow surrender. The world collapses into the rest home room perched on Highgate ridge, vases He walked in after work, turned the telly “How did you and my mother get filled with roses, lavender, pinks and delphiniums. off and said, “Do you love me, Joyce?” together?” the girl asked. The mouse stares, transfixed. “I guess,” her father replied, “you could “Hey!” I said, “I was watching that!” Your husband brings you Cecil Brunner rosebuds which you cannot see and holds “Do you?” say it started with coffee.” your hand. Your family gather. “My mother doesn’t drink coffee,” she “Frank, we’ve been married over thirty Gently, gently. years.” said. The mouse’s body quivers. He said, “I was listening to the radio in Your breath goes as you surrender. ~ work, talking about what listeners think, Mouse’s head in cat’s mouth. about God and that. I thought, I know It is done. “Would you like to come back to my what Joyce thinks. But I didn’t know what place for coffee,” he asked, forgetting that I thought.” BY LIBBY PAULIN she didn’t drink coffee. I looked at him. Libby is a poet and a parent (among other things!) living happily on wheels in Hawea Flat. “I would like that,” she replied, “Did you love me at first,” he asked, “I remembering that she didn’t drink coffee. mean, when we got married?“ “Of course I did,” I told him. “Best BY SIMON KING wedding our family ever had.” Honourable Mentions Simon is a designer, woodworker and writer from He was doing the dishes after tea when Wanaka. Simon is also our featured poet this issue. Black Dog BY SIMON KING and Check out his poem on page 42. he said, “I shouldn’t have asked you that. BY LIZ BRESLIN www.flickr.com/photos/simonkingnz. You know, if you love me. I know you Scribbledog don’t. I don’t mind really. Why should I? I Visit onmag.co.nz to read more from our Flash Fiction Contest. mean, I don’t love you.” I didn’t answer. I felt like having a lie down. The 2012 On Magazine Flash Fiction Contest was judged by Joe Bennett. Joe is a syndicated columnist, travel writer and top-notch public speaker, and he has been BY CHRISTOPHER HORAN named New Zealand’s Columnist of the Year five times. His latest book, Double Christopher lives in Lake Hawea and came a long Happiness: How bullshit works, was released in August, and you really should read it, way to get here. it’s very good. Learn more at www.joebennett.co.nz. 40 onmagazine onmagazine 41 THREE BOATS

1. A wall of sequential photographs In the foreground an icy river rushes Behind, the Potala glows in a shaft of sunlight It’s a sunny day in Tibet

A robed man kneels in the swiftly flowing river He raises above his head a giant wooden stamp Engraved with the Chinese character for water He plunges it into the current and withdraws Raises it again and thrusts it in again

In the gallery there is boulder from the river In a tray of water from Tibet Following the instructions, I dip my finger in the water And draw the symbol for water on the rock But it evaporates before I’m done

The river rushes on It’s a sunny day in Tibet

2. Hundreds of frames of 35mm film hang from a clothesline In each frame stands a naked man From frame to frame he slowly disappears His wife is painting black each part of his body that he cannot see

3. The video projection covers a huge wall The soft whisper of wind in trees comes from hidden speakers There is no frame of reference for the muddy waters of the Mekong We cannot see the banks as we look down Three boats are drifting aimlessly in an ever repeating pattern Three boats are drifting aimlessly Three boats are drifting Three boats

By Simon King

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