THE MILTON H. ERICKSON FOUNDATION NEWSLETTER Vol. 32, No. 3 WINTER 2012 SM

grants. My parents didn’t have the op - Inside INTERVIEW portunity to go to college, so “achieve - ment was next to Godliness,” as far as This my big sister Susan and I were con - Harriet Lerner cerned. I knew we’d get Ph.Ds. the Issue way other kids knew they’d go to ele - Interviewed by Ellyn Bader mentary school. My father talked about INTERVIEW Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., is one of our “my daughters the doctors” while we Harriet Lerner 1 nation’s most respected voices on the were still in our strollers. IN THE SPIRIT OF THERAPY psychology of women and the process EB: Was that a lot of pressure for of change in marriage and families. you? Interview with Michele For more than three decades she was a HL: Back then, boys were sup - Weiner-Davis, M.S.W. 4 staff psychologist at The Menninger posed to “be someone” and girls were Clinic in Topeka, Kansas and a faculty THE POWER OF TWO supposed to “find someone,” so I think member and supervisor at the Karl Ellyn Bader, Ph.D. & it was good that our parents pushed Menninger School of Psychiatry. Cur - Peter Pearson, Ph.D. 6 against the cultural tide. And although rently in private practice in Lawrence, we were very poor, we had great things CASE REPORT Kansas, Lerner is the author of numer - to do. Susan and I were raised in the What If We Stopped Fighting ous scholarly articles and 11 books, in - Brooklyn Public Library, the Brooklyn cluding The New York Times bestseller, Nicotine Addiction? 8 Museum, and the Brooklyn Botanical The Dance of Anger , and, most re - REMEMBERING ERICKSON Gardens. These places were free and cently, Marriage Rules: A Manual for just a subway token away. Up the Mountain 9 the Married and The Coupled Up . She difficult relationships. EB: How did you decide to be - CONTRIBUTOR OF NOTE is also, with her sister, an award-win - Ellyn Bader: Why don’t we start come a psychologist? Alexander Vesely 10 ning children’s book author, and she hosts a blog for Psychology Today and with your personal history so our HL: I know this sounds bizarre, but IN MEMORIAM The Huffington Post . Through the clar - readers can get to know you a bit. I decided to become a clinical psy - Thomas Szasz 11 ity of her writing, clinical work, and Harriet Lerner: Well, I was born chologist before I entered kindergarten, engaging public appearances, Lerner and raised in Brooklyn, the younger of and I never veered from this goal. helps people worldwide to navigate the two daughters. My grandparents on Maybe it had something to do with the Visit Our Website: swamps and quicksand of their most both sides were Russian Jewish immi - www.erickson-foundation.org See INTERVIEW on page 22

The 2013 Couples Conference is Around the Corner The Foundation plans months even years ahead for conferences and the Cou - ples Conference 2013 is no exception. Held April 18-21, 2013 in Manhattan Beach, California, the Couples Conference will most likely be another sold-out event. Every year, we hear from therapists worldwide about how the Couples Con - ference has impacted their lives and made them better marriage and family thera - pists. As Ellyn Bader says eloquently, “Every couples therapist faces challenges when individual personality issues collide with the couples systemic and devel - opmental patterns. The 2013 conference is designed to address working with issues such as addiction, infidelity, narcissism, and deception in the couples context.” The Couples Conference 2013 stellar faculty includes: Ellyn Bader, Ph.D.,

Lonnie Barback Ph.D., Stephanie Brown, Ph.D., Paul Ekman Ph.D., Marty Klein,

D E T S E U Q E R E C I V R E S N R U T E R

2 3 9 1 . o N t i m r e P Ph.D., Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. Bill O’Hanlon, MS, Stephen W. Porges, Ph.D., Terry

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O M , y t i C s a s n a K Real, Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D. and Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW.

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, 0 0 2 . e t S , . d R s a m o h T . E 2 3 6 2 Paul Ekman, who was the feature interview in the last edition of the Newslet -

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. c n I , n o i t a d n u o F n o s k c i r E . H n o t l i M e h T ter, is known for developing the Facial Action Coding System (FACS), which iden - See COUPLES on page 8 2 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter 100 Key Points and Techniques , by ference, you will easily see why we Harvey Ratner, Evan George, and chose “connections” as our theme. The EDITOR’S COMMENTS Chris Iveson. This puts a European wonderful presentations and shared spin on Solution-focused Brief Ther - wisdom at the conference offer con - apy. nections that you may not have ex - I especially enjoy the Winter/ The theme of expanded intercon - pected. If you are not at the Spring edition of the Newsletter since nections is carried forth by John Lentz conference…(sigh)…you are missing it overlaps two of my favorite confer - as he reviews Innovations in NLP For an incredible experience. And, the ences: the Brief Therapy and Couples Challenging Times Vol. 1 , edited by L. Couple’s Conference, which is just conferences. Over the years, in re - Michael Hall and Shelle Rose Charvet. around the corner, is equally mar - viewing the presentations of both con - This book is far more than its title sug - velous. ferences, it occurred to me that their gests. The theme of multilevel connec - common theme was how to make con - tions is continued in Maria Escalante We hope to connect with all of you nections: within one’s self, between in - de Smith’s concise review of Adven - there. dividuals, with the community at large. ture Therapy by Michael A. Gass, H. There is a natural desire to connect L. “Lee” Gilliss, and Keith C. Russell. Richard E. Landis with something greater than the self. Orange, California If you are reading this issue at the Therefore, this issue’s articles and re - Brief Therapy Lasting Solutions Con - views weave back and forth, overlap - ping the themes of both brief and couples therapy. In our last issue, we featured Paul Foundation Plans for Spanish Ekman as our representative of both Books on Dr. Erickson conferences. This issue, Ellyn Bader In keeping with the times, the Foundation is working on offering Spanish Lan - interviews Harriet Lerner as our am - offer us a handful of book reviews guage Editions of three classics by Erickson/Rossi, which should be available some bassador since Bader and Lerner will which include their own unique focus time in 2013. The books were translated by Luis David Guzmán Moreno, M.D. and also be presenting at both conferences. on the theme of connection. Their re - feature original forewords by Ricardo Figueroa Quiroga, M. Sc. Bader and Lerner, as well as Michele view of Alexander Vesely’s feature Weiner-Davis, interviewed in John film, Viktor and I , about his grandfa - The books are: Experiencing Hypnosis: Therapeutic Approaches to Altered Lentz’s In the Spirit of Therapy col - ther, Viktor Frankl, touches on the States or EXPERIMENTANDO LA HIPNOSIS: Abordajes terapéuticos a los esta - umn, act as our connection between theme of family connection. Harriet dos alterados ; also Hypnotic Realities or REALIDADES HIPNÓTICAS: La in - these two great conferences. Lerner’s Marriage Rules is a classic ducción de la Hipnosis Clíncia y formas de suggestión indirecta ; and connection manual for couples. Hillary Hypnotherapy: An Exploratory Casebook or HIPNOTERAPIA: Un libro de ex - The theme of connection at multi - and Bradford Keeney’s book, Circular ploración de casos. ple levels is elegantly presented in Therapeutics: Giving Therapy a Heal - For information, email [email protected] . Marilia Baker’s The Power of Two col - ing Heart , moves beyond technique umn where she interviews Ellyn Bader and presents a non-model approach to Marnie McGann and Peter Pearson. Teresa Garcia- therapy where the therapist becomes Sanchez demonstrates the use of the therapy through connection. As a segue classic Ericksonian approach by facil - between inter- and inner-connection, The Milton H. Erickson Foundation itating a patient to connect with his in - the Simpkins review Mary Beth Wedel ternal resources as she connects with and Robert Wicks’ Primer on Post - him in her brilliant Case Report, What traumatic Growth . As a capstone to If We Stopped Fighting Nicotine Ad - NEWSLETTER their reviews, the development of diction? inner-connections is presented in vol - Executive Editor: Richard Landis, Ph.D. Up the Mountain is Roxanna Er - ume two of Kathryn Rossi’s edition of Review Editors: C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D., ickson Klein’s modern odyssey in find - Selected Papers of Ernest Lawrence Annellen Simpkins, Ph.D. ing and connecting with her Erickson Rossi: An Introduction and Guide and roots. She continues this odyssey in her Creating Consciousness: How Thera - Institutes: Marilia Baker, M.S.W., Cecilia Fabre, M.A. Contributor of Note section with an in - pists Can Facilitate Wonder, Wisdom, Guest Editors: Betty Alice Erickson, M.S., LPC, LMFT terview with filmmaker Alexander Truth and Beauty. This is a beautiful Eric Greenleaf, Ph.D. (Case Reviews) Vesely, documentarian for “Wizard of fusion of Rossi’s vision and genius. Power of Two: Roxanna Erickson Klein, R.N., Ph.D. the Desert,” a film about the life and We again welcome Steve Andreas In the Spirit of Therapy Editor: John Lentz, D.Min. work of Dr. Erickson. John Lenz fur - to our review family with his book re - ther carries this theme with his enthu - view of Daniel Kahneman’s Thinking Guest Reviewers: Steve Andreas, M.A.; Michael Hoyt, Ph.D.; Roxanna Erickson Klein, RN, LCDC, Ph.D.; siastic review of John Gottman’s, The Fast and Slow , which was mentioned Maria Escalante de Smith, M.A.; John D. Lentz, D.Min. Science of Trust: Emotional Attune - in the last issue. This is an excellent ment for Couples . These types of inter - book about how we can connect with Contributing Editor/Writer: Marnie McGann personal connections are demonstrated the outside world. Michael Hoyt re - Production Manager: Karen Haviley in Gabor Filo’s Rapid Hypnotic Induc - views Steve Andreas’ book, Trans - tions: Demonstrations and Applica - forming Negative Self-Talk: Practical, –Board of Directors– The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc. tions , reviewed by Roxanna Erickson Effective Exercises, which focuses on Jeffrey K. Zeig, Ph.D. 2632 E. Thomas Rd., Ste. 200, Klein. how we can connect more effectively Roxanna Erickson Klein, R.N., Ph.D. Phoenix, AZ 85016 J. Charles Theisen, M.A., M.B.A., J.D. U.S.A. Our prolific Review Editors, with our internal world. Hoyt then re - Camillo Loriedo, M.D. Telephone: (602) 956-6196 Alexander and Annellen Simpkins views Solution Focused Brief Therapy: Bernhard Trenkle, Dipl.Psych. FAX: (602) 956-0519 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 3 4 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter IN THE SPIRIT OF THERAPY

ing, biking, hang gliding…anything when my day is over and see all people what are some of the spiritual bless - Interview with with an “ing.” These practices and hob - through this positive lens. I took a hike ings that you have discovered as a bies make Boulderites some of the with my 26-year-old and he said, result of your journey? Michele Weiner- most mentally, physically, and spiritu - “Mom, you really like people. You talk MWD: The early life experience to ally sound beings in America, accord - Davis, M.S.W. to everyone on the trail.” (I don’t think which you refer was the fact that my ing to countless surveys on America’s by John D. Lentz, D.Min. that was a compliment.) He’s right. I parents divorced after 23 years of mar - Most Livable Cities. From the start, I do love people. riage. I didn’t see my parents’ divorce was impressed with the obvious emo - Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW, is an JL: Much of your recent work coming because they never fought and tional centeredness of the community. internationally-renowned relationship has focused more on helping couples our family life was a bit like the Wal - therapist, bestselling author, and pro - I also noticed there is a high inci - reclaim and rekindle their sexual in - tons. I was about to leave home for col - fessional speaker. Among the first in dence of divorce here. People seem to terest and enjoyment. Possibly be - lege and my warm family nest was her field to courageously speak out follow their own hearts as the path to cause of your gentle and powerful falling apart. I was devastated. But that about the pitfalls of unnecessary di - enlightenment, but it occurred to me way of communicating you have devastation fueled my passion to help vorce, Weiner-Davis has been active in that many miss out on another very been extremely helpful to many peo - others avoid divorce whenever possi - spearheading the now popular move - powerful path to spiritual growth -- ple. What are your thoughts about ble. And “others” includes my own ment urging couples to make their mar - through relationships. the deeply spiritual and positive way marriage. Marriage is never easy. Most riages work and keep their families I have learned that relationships are that you have altered so many peo - people who have been in long-term together. She is the author of seven a remarkable arena in which to do ple’s lives? marriages will tell you that there have books, including her bestselling DI - inner work. I base this on nearly three been periods in their lives when they VORCE BUSTING, and THE SEX- MWD: I want the people with decades of work with couples and al - wanted to throw in the towel. My mar - STARVED MARRIAGE. whom I work to feel understood, re - most 40 years with my own husband. spected, and appreciated, regardless of riage is no exception. But because of She also is the recipient of several It is through intimate relationships that their sexual values or expectations. It my past, my work, my love for my professional awards for outstanding we see mirrors of ourselves. Relation - is a direct result of my connection to husband and our family, I feel deter - contribution to the field of marriage ships provide opportunities to share people that allows me to push them, to mined to find a way, again and again, and family therapy from the American our journeys; to confront our emotional demand that they stretch outside their whenever necessary, to make things Association of Marital and Family demons and our shortcomings; to learn comfort zone, both for their own good work, to have a healthy, loving mar - Therapy, Smart Marriages, and Grin - how to compromise; be altruistic; de - and for the good of their relationship. I riage. (My husband often quips that we nell College. tach when necessary; and to forgive. get so immersed in sessions that time could never get a divorce; it would be Weiner-Davis’ work has been fea - Healthy relationships allow us to be - stands still. I am in the flow. People bad for book sales.) tured in major newspapers and maga - come our best selves, to increase inner feel my connection to them and trust I consider this commitment to be a zines and she has made extensive awareness, and to share in life’s joys that I will shepherd them to healthier, blessing in my life and in the lives of media appearances on shows such as and sorrows. Ironically, rough patches more loving places. our children. in relationships offer us unending op - The Oprah Winfrey Show, 48 Hours, JL: While you openly admit that JL: Michele you are a blessing portunities to learn about compassion, 20/20, The Today Show, and CBS This your early life experiences motivated and so is your husband and his empathy, and acceptance. Morning. you to discover ways to help others, humor. Thank you. John D. Lentz: Michele, what do JL: Your books have made you a you consider is the spiritual side of household name and have given a lot working with couples? of folks many more options than Michele Weiner-Davis: Most of they had before reading your work. the couples I work with consist of one What spiritual strengths have you Evolution of Psychotherapy – spouse who desperately wants to save received by dealing with the recog - the marriage and the other who just as nition of so many appreciative peo - Conference of Conferences is Underway ple? desperately wants out. People often ask The Foundation is already gearing up for the history-making conference of how I can handle the stress of seeing MWD: To say that my work gives conferences --the Evolution of Psychotherapy, which is held every four years. In people who have such intense and my life meaning is an understatement. 2013, it will be in Anaheim, California, December 11-15. The Foundation hopes chronic relationship issues in their I consider it a never-ending gift to that by the time you have this Newsletter, our Evolution website will be live and lives. The truth is, little compares to the know that my books, therapy, and offer Early Bird registration. Visit www.evolutionofpsychotherapy.com . feeling I get when I bring together two classes have helped countless couples. First held in Phoenix in 1985, the Evolution conference was covered by Time warring and distant spouses and help I get regular emails from folks thank - magazine, the New York Times and the Los Angeles Times . It sold out three months them fall back in love again. I feel ing me for enabling them to make their in advance and attracted 7,200 attendees. Registrants from more than 40 countries blessed to have the opportunity to truly marriages work and tuck their kids in have attended Evolution Conferences, and 8,600 attended the 2005 Conference make a difference in people’s lives. at bedtime …together. I feel privileged making it the world’s largest psychotherapy gathering. About eight years ago, we moved that people trust me during critical The primary faculty and state-of-the-art faculty at Evolution conferences have to Boulder, Colorado, which is idyllic. times in their lives. My Ericksonian, consistently been top professionals in the field. Keynote speakers and keynote ad - The people are extraordinarily friendly, strength-based lens allows me to see a dresses are legendary. In 2013, the primary faculty includes Albert Badura, Ph.D., socially conscious, and kind. Most of person as resourceful and loving, David Barlow, Ph.D., John Gottman, Ph.D., Julie Gottman, Ph.D., Jean Houston, the people I meet engage in activities which in turn provides a foundation for Ph.D., Otto Kernberg, MD, Marsha Linehan, Ph.D., Cloe Madanes, HDL, LIC, that promote spiritual growth such as positive therapeutic relationships. The Donald Meichenbaum, Ph.D., Salvador Minuchin, M.D., Erving Polster, Ph.D., yoga and meditation. Plus, they regu - best part is that I take my Ericksonian, larly convene with nature through hik - strength-based perspective with me See EVOLUTION on page 8 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 5 6 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter THE POWER OF TWO

daughter Molly. This year, Ellyn trav - Ellyn Bader, Ph.D. elled alone. & Peter Pearson, Savoir être also has to do with the cultivated abilities to effectively inter - Ph.D. act with individuals, groups, and com - By Marilia Baker munities, as well as the environment - physical or emotional. Again, an ob - The greatest ordeal in life is mar - serving look at their website offers riage. It is the central focus for en - many examples of active engagement lightenment and the natural with the professional community and therapeutic process in the culture. respectful care for the emotional well- This exquisite, sophisticated, and being of couples in the larger commu - knowledgeable definition of marriage nity. Impressive are the many by Carl Whitaker, M.D., pioneer fam - practicing clinicians in several cities ily therapist and grand innovator in the throughout California that Bader and field fits well the philosophy, life work, Pearson have incorporated into their and clinical practice of psychologists Couples Institute. Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson. For Bader and Pearson’s enduring com - more than a quarter of a century they mitment to educate and facilitate have been the leaders of a new genera - having trained with them in several set - pendence, as well as satisfying inter - growth and encourage emotionally tion of specialized practitioners, and tings since 1991, the best way I can dependence. I find this key develop - sound relationships is expressed in “movers and shakers” -- daring inno - find to properly convey their essence mental concept of “many marriages Ellyn’s statement: “I am passionate vators in the field of couples therapy. and body of work and personhood is within the marriage” to be viscerally about stopping unnecessary divorces Their 1988 book, In Quest of the Myth - employing the concepts: savoir faire, critical in understanding couplehood and helping couples grow into rich, re - 4 5 ical Mate -- A Developmental Ap - savoir être, and savoir devenir . In this and its vicissitudes . warding partnerships.” To that end they proach to Diagnosis and Treatment in context, the concepts have to do with also have been actively devoted to their 1 Savoir être : to know how-to-be-in- Couples Therapy , has been described expanding dimensions of conscious ac - the-world, or to have the personal qual - “commitment to train a core of excep - as “the most comprehensive and prac - tions and evolving consciousness on ities and self-capacities to make things tional couples therapists worldwide” to tical approach to couples therapy of its the part of individuals. These dimen - prevent unnecessary divorces and to 2 happen. Having followed Ellyn and time.” It has been highly acclaimed sions elegantly capture the couple’s Pete’s evolution as highly effective facilitate couples in blossoming into and a suggested textbook for graduate prolific production as therapists and trainers, successful business builders, satisfied-with-themselves Individuals training in couples therapy throughout their role-modeling as work-in- and business partners throughout two who choose to grow with the Other in the country. They were awarded the progress married couple. decades, I also have been personally fulfilling relationships. Clark Vincent Award by the California Savoir faire , or “know-how.” In touched by their humanness in expos - Please click on www.couplesinsti - Association of Marriage and Family this case: to know how to work effec - ing their own marital challenges at the tutetraining.com/developmentalmodel Therapy for their outstanding contri - tively with a troubled couple in therapy appropriate “teaching moment.” Their to learn about their comprehensive and bution to the field. Likewise, their to ultimately facilitate their healthy solid differentiation stance is moving accessible training program, wherever book Tell Me No Lies , well-regarded evolution as lovers and friends. I uti - and impressive. An attentive, clinical you live in the world. As they mention by clinicians and committed couples, lize the term savoir faire to better char - eye at what they named “A Journey in on their website, their training inte - is a valuable complement to building acterize Ellyn and Peter’s Negotiation,” the six-minute video of grates attachment theory, differentia - an honest relationship throughout all sophisticated, substantial, and innova - school building in Kenya ( www.cou - tion theory, and neuroscience, stages of marriage or committed rela - tive interventions when working with plesinstitute.com/kenya ), a project dear compatible with professional audi - tionships. 3 couples – whether heterosexual or to Ellyn’s heart and soul, shows you ences that they, individually or to - There is much to mention about the same-sex – in all phases of the life how aptly the couple presented their gether, have trained in the U.S., body of work and personal life of Ellyn cycle. The challenges emerging at each wishes to each other, and negotiated Europe, Asia, Australia, and South Bader and Peter Pearson, founders of phase of the human life cycle are throughout a few weeks of Initiator-In - America. Ellyn reiterates: “This train - 6 The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, worked therapeutically through the quirer dialogue . On the table were ing receives consistent, enthusiastic California ( www.couplesinstitute.com ). lenses of positive, normalized devel - each one’s wishes, interests, values, feedback that enhances rather than col - Their skillfully designed, all-encom - opmental stages or growth impasses, self-definition, emotional self-regula - lides with other therapeutic ap - passing website is an eloquent, living however painful or unhealthy at the tion at the prospect of not getting what proaches.” testimonial of the myriad pathways moment. Their book, The Develop - each wanted, and the prospect of a long To complete their passionate dedi - they have walked through – better said: mental Model of Couples Therapy , is physical separation. Eventually, a cation to community and change is navigated through -- in the past 30 the core of their creation. In essence, sound, satisfactory resolution for both Ellyn’s enthusiastic involvement with years as clinicians, business partners, Bader and Pearson’s model focuses emerged. Throughout the process they displaced children of developing coun - and married couple. Their website, away from pathologies (even though maintained their individuality while tries, such as Kenya. She and her fam - along with online training, blog, and they do exist and are properly worked being actively curious about each other ily have been actively offering severely newsletter, is a treasure trove of useful through therapeutically). The model --all elements of a healthy, differenti - underprivileged children, a hands-on information for clinicians and for cou - emphasizes the growth challenges cou - ated dyad. The last time the Kenya effort in equipment building and have ples seeking education and treatment. ples confront as “stepping stones to project was on the table they decided facilitated the children’s access to uni - Having known them as authors and deep intimacy,” towards healthy inde - to go together as a family with their Continued on next page The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 7

POWER OF TWO continued from page 6 WEBSITE REVIEW versal resources and education. This is gratefully enhanced by the couple’s an exceedingly worthy endeavor that own rich marital relationship journey. has worldwide reverberations. I would That they are willing to walk the extra The Developmental Model of Couples not be at all surprised if future world mile for couples, or fly the 20,000 leaders sprout from this well-tended extra miles to make a difference in the Therapy: Integrating Attachment, soil. Please make sure to revisit world makes this crystal clear: they www.couplesinstitute.com/kenya . offer the reader 12 commandments! Differentiation, and Neuroscience Savoir devenir : This leads me to a Thank you Ellyn Bader and Peter Online Web Course with Ellyn Bader final comment on the meaning of this Pearson for all that you are and do. 2011 The Couples Institute third component – to be aware and For comprehensive information conscious about the future -- which please go to: www.couplesinstitute.com . www.CouplesInstituteTraining.com takes me back to Whitaker’s observa - Reviewed by Annellen M. Simpkins, Ph.D. & C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D. tion that marriage is a natural thera - 1 San Diego, California peutic process in cultures and a central Please consult: Bader, E. & Pearson, focus of enlightenment. Savoir devenir P. (1988) In Quest of the Mythi - Couples present unique challenges because they often come into a therapist’s essentially is to consciously become cal Mate: A Developmental Ap - office angry, distressed, and closed-minded. “The Developmental Model of Cou - aware or knowledgeable about the fu - proach to Diagnosis and ples Therapy: Integrating Attachment, Differentiation, and Neuroscience” is taught ture, integrating innate talents and cul - Treatment in Couples Therapy. by seasoned expert, Ellyn Bader, and will guide you toward mastery in your work. tivated qualities throughout one’s Brunner/Mazel: New York. She has created a one-year web course that offers clinicians a map for their cou - lifetime. From the conversations I had 2See: Ellyn Bader & Peter Pearson, ple-helping journey. For a monthly fee, clinicians from anywhere in the world can with Ellyn and Peter in preparing for The Couples Institute , news re - participate in this course and earn 36 CE credits. this edition of The Power of Two , and lease online. April 21, 2012, The website is easy to navigate. The content is based in Bader and Pear - from the lively narrative on their April paragraph 1. son’s developmental model. It offers a lesson every two weeks that reads like a 2012 Newsletter online, I can easily 3See further: (2001) Tell Me No Lies – chapter of a book that you can download and save for later reference. Written in a surmise their commitment to the fu - How to Face the Truth and Build friendly style, the 23 lessons gently guide you through learning the approach. And ture. an Honest Marriage. Saint Mar - each lesson contains homework assignments to foster personal experiencing. You It all started nearly 30 years ago tin Press: New York. do not have to travel alone, because the course also includes a monthly conference when they decided to marry and to call with Bader and other participants, along with blogging to discuss the ins and 4I am inspired here by the work of work together. As they indicate, they outs of putting the ideas into practice. Christiane Faure-Hubert and truly did not yet know what their pas - Robert Faure, Institut Devenir @ Often people believe that couples therapy is superficial or secondary to sion was or what their mission would www.institut-devenir.com . individual work, but Bader explains how couples work can be the primary treat - be. They discussed several options, in - ment. Her approach teaches ways to think developmentally, to look to the past to 5These developmental stages and their cluding opening a restaurant (!), im - discover the patterns that form reactions. Deep work is achieved as you learn how multiple combinations are strik - porting houseboats from India (!!) and, to make a diagnosis and set goals to help navigate clients’ seas of disturbance. The ingly parallel to the psychologi - building a therapy practice. Their main course shows how to change negative and defensive cycles and resolve relevant in - cal evolution of the baby. They concern was to “support couples so trapsychic issues. And through the process, you can discover helpful ways to teach were adapted to the adult couple that they would not unravel under the couples new skills, and elicit satisfying ways of relating. stress of dual careers, parenting, or stages by Bader & Pearson from: from managing their differences.” (1975) The Psychological Birth The method is based in attachment, differentiation, and neuroscience. Instruc - Thankfully for the rest of us, in 1984 of the Human Infant by Margaret tion begins with key theories and assessment tools that help you make a diagnosis they decided to establish The Couples Maher et al. Basic Books: New to inform your treatment. You will find there are classic constructs drawn from Institute “to help all types of couples York. founders such as Margaret Mahler, Fred Pine, John Bowlby, and Mary Ainsworth. Differentiation, one of Mahler’s stages of development, is a cornerstone of Bader’s create relationships full of energy and 6This is a dialogue process created by vitality!” approach. Differentiation is the ability of partners to know and share their personal Bader & Pearson, aptly named I- feelings and desires; to let each other know who they really are. Paradoxically, Bader and Pearson’s savoir faire, to-I: Initiator-to- Inquirer , The with differentiation, as couples come to accept each other as unique individuals, savoir être, and savoir devenir also is Development of Self: Crucial to they become more intimate. The course clarifies the integration of attachment and skillfully summarized and enveloped Greater Intimacy and Satisfac - differentiation and how to work with all aspects of partnership, to steer couples to within “Ten Commandments for Gain - tion in Relationships . (I-to-I also deeper satisfaction and fulfillment. Also included are ways to utilize the new brain ing and Building Trust,” which they of - implying a play in words for “eye science. Some lessons are devoted to methods for helping couples who are openly fered in the recent book Ten to eye,” face-to-face with your hostile and those who avoid conflict. Specific exercises give you tools for pro - Commandments for Couples , edited partner.) 7 moting healthy interaction, fostering empathy, and soothing. You will also find by Jeffrey Zeig and Tami Kulbatski. 7Consult further: Jeffrey K. Zeig, lessons on different types of partner patterns, such as passive-aggressive and nar - Ellyn and Peter gift the reader with Ph.D. & Tami Kulbatski, Psy.D. cissistic, as well as strategies for dealing with infidelity. The case examples of cou - precise, concise, and to-the-point (eds.): (2012) Ten Command - ples given are ones that you can relate to and use as a springboard for your own pearls of insight and wisdom -- insight ments for Couples – For Every understanding. and wisdom that were acquired Aspect of Your Relationship Jour - through their chosen mission in life, The course lessons have a great deal to offer clinicians from many different ney. Zeig, Tucker & Theisen therapeutic schools to help them become comfortable and effective in working their passion, hard work, and indefati - Publishers: Phoenix, Arizona. gable dedication to the perplexed in re - with couples. The model is consistent and well thought out, and the techniques are lationships. This dedication has been clearly presented so that you can learn by doing. We highly recommend this course! 8 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter CASE REPORT chotherapy, although with a very dif - duced for three main reasons. First, be - load ourselves with stress; and we can ferent objective: the resolution of grief. cause there is neither a prohibition nor What If We Stopped change all those things whenever we Of course, quitting smoking consti - a limitation; second, because it means Fighting Nicotine want to.” tuted a “minor result” of the treatment, there’s no chance to fail, which has I delivered the positive suggestion yet this was for M.T. the confirmation probably been a fear factor present in Addiction? at a time when M.T. was beginning to that he had overcome his most unset - previous attempts; and third, because tling emotions, some of which he prob - the quitting is gradual and this keeps I begin all my treatments with the wonder whether or not I was going to ably couldn’t have owned before the the withdrawal symptoms to a mini - question: “What would you like to agree to treat him. (And it looked as balloon farewell. mum—a similar effect to any aid of change today -- and why?” The client though I was not against tobacco). This nicotine replacement therapy. M.T. answered, “I want to quit smok - was a receptive moment; a moment of It is for this reason why we must ing because it’s bad for me.” (I find this request. My next step was to tell him not spurn any opportunity to allow the My client, M.T., received a record - is a staple answer for most people who that it would be necessary to do a client’s unconscious to express itself, ing for self-hypnosis, reinforcing the are asked the same question.) I nor - farewell exercise to say goodbye to even though he may appear to seek suggestions of well-being, of going for mally follow my question with a desta - “good old friend tobacco.” I usually therapy for a problem as secondary as his goal, and of feeling satisfied after bilization technique. This is intended accomplish these farewell exercises nicotine addiction. drinking water and being able to exer - with hand levitation where I suggest to simultaneously create an increase in After having demystified several cise his freedom not to smoke. He that the client’s rising hand is tied like motivation to the point where the aspects of tobacco, including it tastes eventually began eliminating the ciga - a puppet on a string to a balloon that is clients are almost demanding to be good (Did my client remember the rettes that he smoked automatically or filled with smoke. I then proceed to in - treated. It also brings about a state of taste of his first cigarette?), or that it’s out of compulsion. struct clients to cut the string and confusion during which, taken aback relaxing (Did he know that one of the M.T.’s ability to quit tobacco took watch the balloon go up, enjoying its momentarily, clients will look for co - effects of nicotine is to increase adren - place gradually, within about a week. ascent and feeling grateful for having herence anywhere and therefore accept aline levels?), I asked M.T. to follow, Having attended hypnosis sessions been liberated. any suggestions they can understand; a to a tee, a smoking methodology, and, every other day, there came a moment little bit like clutching at a straw. When I got to this point with M.T., above all, to not make any effort to not when he quit smoking completely, My response to M.T. was spoken he frowned and a teardrop rolled down smoke. I told M.T. to carry a pack of without struggling with the addiction. quickly so he wouldn’t have a chance his cheek. He said, “I’ve realized that if cigarettes with him because quitting an The goals of the second and third ses - to analyze my words. I said, “So what? I quit smoking, it will be like betraying addiction means being able to remain sions were to consolidate all progress We’re always doing things that are bad my father and brother who both died of indifferent when coming in contact noticed and to prevent any possible re - for us! We don’t exercise; we don’t eat lung cancer.” with the addictive substance. If he lapses, including using food as com - enough fiber; we don’t drink enough From that moment on, the treat - feared a relapse it was probably be - pensation for not smoking. M.T. water; we don’t get enough rest; we ment proceeded like traditional psy - cause his need for tobacco had not overcame his addiction and any possi - completely dissipated. I told M.T. to ble relapes because the treatment given carry a bottle of water and to drink to him was rooted in managing anxi - every time he felt the need for a ciga - ety, not generating it. COUPLES continued from page 1 rette. After taking a few sips, he would be able to decide whether or not he Teresa Garcia-Sanchez tifies every human expression -- expressions that are not culturally determined but wanted to give up his “freedom not to Instituto Erickson Madrid Director universal across cultures. He also has studied deception for more than 30 years, and smoke’ or choose to light up a cigarette [email protected] the television series “Lie to Me” was based on his real-life scientific discoveries. and take a few drags. Harriet Lerner, the featured interview for this Newsletter, is one of the nation’s With this method, anxiety is re - Translator Claudio Vanini most respected voices on the psychology of women and marriage and family re - lationships. Her “Dance” books, including the Dance of Anger , have been best - sellers, and her most recent book, Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and Coupled Up is reviewed in this edition of Newsletter by the Simpkins. EVOLUTION continued from page 4 Michele Weiner-Davis is an internationally-renowned relationship therapist and author. She is interviewed by John Lentz for this edition’s “In the Spirit of Ernest Rossi, Ph.D., Francine Shapiro, Ph.D., and Jeffrey Zeig, Ph.D. Therapy.” Author of seven books, including DIVORCE BUSTING and THE SEX- The state-of-the-art faculty includes Judith Beck, Ph.D., Claudia Black, Ph.D., STARVED MARRIAGE , Weiner-Davis is the recipient of the Award for Outstand - David Burns, Ph.D., Jon Carlson, PsyD, EdD, Nicholas Cummings, Ph.D., ScD, ing Contribution to the field of Marriage and Family Therapy from the AAMFT. Stephen Gilligan, Ph.D., Steven Hayes, Ph.D., Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., Kay Red - Subjects to be addressed in conference workshops include: difficult partners; field Jamison, Ph.D., Sue Johnson, EdD, Jack Kornfield, Ph.D., Harriet Lerner, love in the modern age; caring for aging parents; a deceptive partner; understand - Ph.D., Peter Levine, Ph.D., Scott Miller, Ph.D., William Miller, Ph.D., Bill O’Han - ing the language of intimacy; couple and family addiction and recovery; pornog - lon, MS, Violet Oaklander, Ph.D., Christine Padesky, Ph.D., Mary Pipher, Ph.D., raphy as an issue in relationships; why couples may not enjoy sex – and ways to Daniel Siegel, M.D., Derald Wing Sue, Ph.D., Bessel van der Kolk, M.D., Michele help them; modeling successful relationships after the movies; spirituality in rela - Weiner-David, MSW, LCSW and Michael Yapko, Ph.D. tionships; men and depression; new rules of marriage; forgiveness after an affair; Keynote speakers include Aaron Beck, M.D., Gerald Edelman, M.D., Ph.D., and couples therapy with only one spouse. Martin Seligman, Ph.D., Gloria Steinem and Irvin Yalom, M.D. Keynote addresses For more information on the Couples Conference please visit will be from Diane Ackerman, Ph.D., Daniel Amen, M.D., Paul Ekman, Ph.D. and www.couplesconference.com . Michael Gazzaniga, Ph.D.

Marnie McGann Marnie McGann The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 9 REMEMBERING ERICKSON

tain as “the most beautiful place on Up the Mountain earth.” Albert II traveled alone to the The floor was dirt, and we recalled our Grandma By Roxanna Erickson Klein remote area in a ‘41 Ford that repeat - Clara telling how every bit of spare water edly overheated. With the guidance of was poured on the floor to keep the dust down. On December 5, 1901, Albert Er - a local historian, he was successful in ickson left his cabin in the mountains locating Aurum’s general store, the of the Schell Creek Range and went to post office, the cemetery, and the the mine where he dug silver ore with “everlasting spring” where water was an ore transfer station where miners parent what was missing from what a pickaxe and shovel. By the time he available year-round. He did not have brought their loads on mule back and once had been, and now was no more. returned for lunch, his wife, Clara, had descriptions of our grandparent’s prepared them for transport to the Once the land spoke, the vision be - given birth to their second child, Mil - home; he could not differentiate it from crusher. Each of these sites has been came clear: we imagined the whole of ton Hyland Erickson. the many others that were standing at marked by the local historical society. the cabin stretching across the pathway beyond the emptiness, looking out onto Albert and Clara Erickson, Milton that time, but he took snapshots of all The cabin itself was more elusive and the valley, just like the photograph. We Erickson’s parents, lived in the com - the structures he found. When he re - it took us two full days of scrambling stood there, and let Alex take our photo munity of Aurum, Nevada, nestled turned, Albert and Clara studied the up game trails and through overgrown with the horizon matching the photo within Silver Canyon in White Pine photographs and initially had some dif - valleys to finally find it. . taken more than a century earlier. County. In 1900, Aurum was noted in a ficulty in recognizing the land that they In 1901 when Milton was born, the historic register to have a population of had left a half a century earlier. How - log cabin was relatively large and com - Set high in altitude, over 8,000 feet 54, but the town was abandoned a few ever, after pondering, they realized it fortable for the time and circum - amongst the spruce and ponderosa years later due to diminishing ore sup - was only the man-made features that stances. Dug into the side of the pine, without running water or even a ply and a catastrophic landslide. The had changed; the mountains remained mountain, the rocks provided more nearby spring, the effort needed to high cost of transporting ore was also a the same. With that realization, they moderate temperatures than felt in the maintain a household and raise young major factor in the dwindling popula - began to recognize the cabins of their standard more exposed cabins. The children in a cabin such as this is al - tion of the community. Aurum still de - friends and neighbors, but did not find floor was dirt, and we recalled our most unimaginable. The energy re - pended on wagons for transport while their own home. In hope of Albert II’s Grandma Clara telling how every bit of quired to bring necessities up the other areas in the state were develop - later return to the area, they gave him spare water was poured on the floor to mountain trail to the cabin and to sur - ing railroads. Today, the area remains careful, more explicit descriptions of keep the dust down. The house was vive the harsh winters seems over - isolated and sparsely populated, al - where the cabin sat in relation to Sil - broad, with a room for Simon Davis, whelming. Throughout their lives, though the Pony Express Trail, which ver Canyon; it was at a distance from who was Albert’s partner in the mining Albert and Clara, as well as Milton, runs through the county, is currently the community so they “would not venture, and a bachelor and long-time talked about the need to utilize every being preserved. have rowdy neighbors,” and close to friend. The cabin opened facing east - resource , but it was the beauty of life the mine. they talked about most often. In 1906, when Milton was 5 years wards offering a view of the valley Grandma’s favorite song, Home on the old, the Ericksons left Nevada. The Years later, accompanied by one of below where most of the miners set - Range , was one way she reminded our family, which then included Milton their other children, Albert and Clara tled. family of the unsurpassed grandeur of and his two sisters, began their journey did have an opportunity to visit the While many of the logs of the cabin those years. east in a covered wagon, later catching canyon and enjoy the beauty of the were still intact, the sides had fallen a train to Wisconsin. Albert’s partner in peaceful location that had been so im - over, and a four-wheeler path had cut Being there, seeing, feeling the sur - business, Simon Davis, stayed behind portant in their lives. It was not until through the center where some of the rounding beauty, I became aware of to close the mine before he retired in September 2012 that Albert II returned structural parts must have been carried how my brother Albert II is so like my Hawaii. Albert had done well at the to Aurum. I joined him, his wife Lil - away. As such, it was not immediately Dad. He was drawn by curiosity, inter - mine, but he and Clara agreed the chil - lian, and Alex Vesely, documentatian recognizable, and we took a long while est, and a desire to discover things dren needed “proper schooling,” Sell - for Wizard of the Desert , to see if we studying the cabin, the horizon and the firsthand. We spent two days climbing ing their interest in the mine they put could find the cabin. Starting with a description. A 30-foot tall spruce grew around the rough terrain, Albert, now the settlement of $400 towards the pur - visit to the local historical railroad, we inside the structure, which enabled Al - in his 83rd year walking with a cane chase of an 80-acre farm in Beaver verified geographical coordinates of bert II to estimate that the roof col - faster than I could go. All the while, as Dam. The farm is where Albert and Aurum, picked up a topographical lapsed between 1930 and 1940. An I scrambled breathlessly to catch up, I Clara raised their seven daughters and map, and read some narratives about experienced woodsman, he factored in noticed how his gait, leaning on the two sons. Milton lived and worked on mining in White Pine County. Think - climate and elevation along with DBH cane, and his profile are so much like the farm until he left for the University ing we were all set in a four-wheel (Diameter at Breast Height) to estimate our Dad’s. As we discovered the cabin, of Wisconsin to embark on higher ed - drive with a GPS, we gathered a few the age of the tree as 70 years old. Al - I felt Albert’s undying determination, ucation. things including the old map that Al - bert II also calculated the approximate so much like Dad’s. The fulfillment of bert had drawn and a photograph of the locating the cabin brought another di - In September 2012, Milton Erick - date the spruce seedling first received Erickson family on their front porch mension of pleasure to the moment, son’s oldest son and my oldest brother, sunlight to germinate and grow into its taken in the early 1900s. feeling the continuity of generations Albert II, and I went to Nevada to look present 15-inch diameter as consistent over more than a century. I felt close to for the Erickson homestead. Close to While remote, it was relatively with the decay of the roof occurring my Dad, to my grandparents, and to his grandparents, Albert II had jour - easy to locate the stone foundation that approximately 30 years after the de - my siblings. The shared experience of neyed there in 1951 to take photo - remains of the post office and general parture of the cabin’s inhabitants. being together in that place, in body graphs and gather memories to bring store, and with some effort we found While the structure fit what we and spirit, brought kinship beyond back to Albert and Clara. They often the spring and the cemetery. As we knew, it was not until we studied the time. reminisced and described their moun - searched for the cabin we came across contours of the land that it became ap - 10 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter CONTRIBUTOR OF NOTE

enna. I explored the connection among which stories to set aside. Luckily, in ALEXANDER film, narration, and therapy in my mas - the process of putting all the material VESELY ter’s degree thesis. I think my appreci - together, the story began to tell itself, ation of psychotherapy has improved to find cohesion and meaning. It began A Filmmaker my work as a director, especially in to show the humanity of this great working with actors. I gained many thinker. I am pleased with the outcome. Documenting valuable insights which have impacted Professionals worldwide had been ask - Psychotherapy and changed the way I approach film - ing for a more cohesive understanding making. Engaging emotions in a way of the work of Dr. Viktor Frankl, while Introduction that can lead to insight is an important an even broader group of people were clamoring to know more about the per - The Erickson Foundation is work - element of psychotherapy. It is similar son. ing with filmmaker and director, to generating an atmosphere that cap - Alexander Vesely of Vienna, Austria to tures an audience. REK: As I understand it, the ap - produce a documentary about Milton Looking at different schools of proach to “Wizard of the Desert” will H. Erickson. “Wizard of the Desert” therapy and their parallels to the cine - be similar to the one used to show the will offer a broad audience a look at matic experience, the work of Milton work of Viktor Frankl. the personal and professional side of Erickson immediately stood out. His AV: It is difficult to capture the Dr. Erickson.. groundbreaking ideas as well as his essence of a man and his work by sim - This interview between Vesely and pared different schools of psychother - personal life’s story are so remarkable ply looking at volumes of text. Film is Roxanna Erickson Klein takes place in apy, the journey of exploration led me that I wanted to see his story on screen. the medium of our time and an ideal October of this year. Both Klein and to an interest in the work of Milton Er - REK: How did you get started in way to remind the world of great men Vesely would like to thank Mary Cim - ickson. The Erickson Foundation has the art of directing films? and their work. While researching Dr. been central in helping me and others Erickson’s work, I came to think of iluca, CEO, at Noetic Films, Inc. for AV: Enthusiasm for film and the vi - learn about his remarkable therapeutic him as a great American hero. Once I her ongoing support and business acu - sual arts has always been part of me. I approaches. began to work on this documentary, in - men, which has helped bring this im - began to make films as a child. In fact, terviewing many former patients, stu - portant project to fruition. For approximately two years I have I got my first camera at age seven and dents, colleagues, family, and friends, I Roxanna Erickson Klein (REK): collaborated with the Foundation on I have directed, produced, and written became even more intrigued by his Hi Alex. I would like to take this op - “Wizard of the Desert.” I have filmed many short films, commercials, and character. He was a gifted man who portunity to ask you to share with our dozens of interviews with profession - documentaries. The opportunity just overcame great physical challenges to readers your background in filmmak - als from around the world; the stories happened by circumstance, but once I become an enlightened healer. He had ing. they told will illustrate the profound embraced it, things began to fall into the ability to move patients toward impact Dr. Erickson’s work has had on place in a way that helped me to rec - Alexander Vesely (AV): It’s a wellness by utilizing their own words their diverse professional practices. ognize my own talents. pleasure to speak with you, and thank and simple, everyday activities. His REK: It’s true that my father’s you for giving me this opportunity to My work has now begun to be rec - techniques have been studied by thou - words and messages have had a lasting talk about my favorite subject -- film. ognized in Hollywood and I have been sands, yet no one can fully explain how impact on so many lives. I’ve seen a REK: Let’s begin with our mutual offered several important film projects. he so powerfully did what he did. The number of those interviews and I have endeavor, the making of “Wizard of the I am beginning the process of applying stories about him are vital to preserve. also been interviewed for this film. You for a U.S. work visa. In addition, one Desert.” Can you tell us about this REK: Many of these stories were are quite skilled in drawing stories out of my short films, “Codigo Capital,” project and why you have taken an in - at risk of being lost without the work of people. produced and directed in Argentina, terest in it? you have done. Overall, what do you AV: Thank you. While I encourage was an official selection at the Latino AV: My passion has always been think is the most difficult aspect of the people to talk about their memories Film Festival in Berlin. “Viktor & I, An filmmaking. I recognize the tremen - film? and the relationship they had with Dr. Alexander Vesely Film” won the Dia - dous impact that a film can have on an Erickson, I also want to illustrate it mond Award from the California Film AV: This work is challenging in individual’s life. A long time ago, I re - without changing or altering the emo - Awards along with three other presti - that it had not begun until decades after ceived a note from the great Steven tional content that they bring to the in - gious recognitions. I was most hum - Dr. Erickson’s death. This has offered Spielberg who wrote: “Film is so pow - terview. I seek to capture the impact bled and honored by these some advantage, in that mature profes - erful, use it wisely and enjoy it.” Those that Dr. Erickson had on the individual recognitions. sionals are able to look back and rec - words have remained with me and still ognize ways in which Dr. Erickson who is telling his story. REK: I have seen “Viktor & I” and guide me. Film can convey complex influenced them. However, it also was REK: It must be a delicate balance agree that the recognition is well concepts by translating them into ex - a serious disadvantage, in that some re - -- encouraging people to tell their story, earned. periences that guide us through differ - sources have gone to the four winds, so yet not leading them in one direction ent emotional states. It encourages That film helped us see that you to speak. learning in a profound way. or another. You seem to have a special have the ability to tell our story about talent there too. Tell us how your train - REK: In the event that other mate - I have formally studied psy - Dr. Erickson in an interesting, com - ing in psychotherapy has fit with your rial or opportunities become available, chotherapy. My interest in human mo - pelling, yet accurate way. work as a filmmaker. will you still work with us to add to the tivation and the way the mind works, AV: I went through a vast amount film? together with my passion for filmmak - AV: In order to gain a deeper un - of archival material for “Viktor & I,” AV: I am always committed to as - ing gave me direction; even my mas - derstanding and to improve my direct - as well as the footage I had shot my - sure that the work is as complete as ter’s degree thesis was on “ cinema ing skills, I formally studied self. A lot of it was great material and therapy. ” As I learned about and com - psychotherapy at the University of Vi - the biggest challenge was to decide Continued on next page The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 11 FILM REVIEW VESELY continued from page 10 viewers to give advice and encourage- anxiety, leading to detachment and Viktor and I ment to the larger audience. And we change. possible. If the opportunity arises for Alexander Vesely, Filmmaker see Frankl doing just that in a fascinat- shooting additional material, I will be The section about the Holocaust is happy to work with the Foundation to Noetic Films ing collection of movie clips. Another particularly moving, and includes integrate it into the film so that it, too, 2011 inspiring story involves a paralyzed some of Frankl’s fascinating insights. will be preserved. www.viktorandimovie.com man, Jerry Long, who had been a He believed that there are only two ISBN: 978-0-615-46806-5 promising athlete but suffered a debil- races in the world: decent people and REK: I was hoping you would say $24.95 itating injury to his spine at age 18. indecent people. When the indecent that. My own archival work tells me Reviewed by C. Alexander Simpkins, Long read Frankl’s book and wrote people gain power, a Holocaust be- that you never know what resources Ph.D. & Annellen M. Simpkins, Ph.D. him a letter, explaining how it modi- comes possible. The movie covers might be discovered, and so the work San Diego, California fied his attitude. “I broke my neck, but many educational topics, including re- is never complete. it didn’t break me,” he wrote. That let- AV: You are so right. I once wrote Filmmaker Alexander Vesely has ligion, faith, relationships, and humor- ter initiated a meaningful relationship that producing a documentary is a bit created Viktor and I, a feature film -all seen through the lens of a man who between the two men And, Long went like a treasure hunt -- you find pearls about his grandfather, Viktor Frankl, lived his beliefs. on to become a psychologist who has around every corner. My tendency as a the founder of Logotherapy. The movie Moviegoers will have an experi- used his experiences to transform his director is to continue to add footage, is an artistically presented collage of ence and get to know a great man when clients. but at some point, you must cut the re- interviews, interspersed with Frankl’s watching Viktor and I. They will also In the film, we also witness Frankl search and finish the film. lectures, TV appearances, and intimate be inspired to rise above their own and others explaining the famous par- memoirs. Vivid visuals combined with challenges in life to find meaning, REK: Well Alex, I want to let you adoxical intention technique. For ex- moving music convey a powerful ex- which can set them free. know that your contribution to the ample, if clients are anxious and afraid periential presence of this inspirational Foundation Archives is substantial. I of fainting, the technique involves en- The movie ends with a panoramic man and his valuable work. mountain view and Frankl’s last words, have found working with you to be a couraging them to wish to faint—and rare privilege. The movie highlights Frankl’s faint many times! A client may laugh “The situation lacks tragedy.” ideas, which are just as relevant today at this idea, which is incompatible with We highly recommend this movie! AV: Thank you very much. It is a as they were when he first had them as pleasure working with you too. an inmate in a concentration camp dur- ing the Holocaust. He has taught us how to rise above any unchangeable IN MEMORIAM situation, no matter how horrific, and emerge better human beings. We can’t pursue happiness, he maintained, we Thomas Szasz noses. Szasz pointed out the insidious everyone as sane and subject to the must let it surface as a natural byprod- paradoxes created by third-party pay- same laws, tabbing the insanity de- uct in the quest for meaning in life and “In my view, the most important ers, noting that such payment disem- fense a psychiatric swindle. love. In fact, the most traumatic cir- human values are political liberty as powers the patient and poisons a The author of more than 30 books, cumstances have the highest potential freedom from coercion and Szasz was born April 15, for meaning in one’s life. Therefore, personal responsibility as re- 1920 in Budapest and moved we have opportunity to transmute specting promises and hold- to the U.S. with his family in tragedy into triumph. ing others responsible for 1938. Szasz was a member of Moviegoers are offered an almost their actions.” So said the faculty of SUNY Upstate personal encounter with Frankl Thomas Szasz in an interview Medical University in Syra- through disclosures from those who for the Erickson Foundation cuse, New York. knew him intimately: his family, Newsletter in 2010 when he Tom was a great friend of friends, colleagues, and religious lead- was 91. Dr. Szasz passed the Erickson Foundation, ers. These personal stories reveal away September 8, 2012, at serving on the faculty of all Frankl to be a deeply caring individual. the age of 92. the Evolution of Psychother- His capacity for forgiveness is shown A man of abnormal in- apy Conferences. He when he helps a former Nazi to find tegrity, he railed against coer- keynoted the 2010 Brief work. And, many are probably not cive treatments. Piercing the Therapy Conference where aware of Frankl’s sources for his lofty veil of collective denial, he the Foundation presented him perspectives. Since his youth, he was advocated individual liberty with a specially bound copy an avid mountain climber and utilized as a primary ethic. Szasz de- of his 1961 book Myth of memories of his climbs to rise above clared that the ways of psy- Mental Illness, celebrating his suffering at the camps. He also chiatry are not the ways of the 50th anniversary of its trained to get an American pilot’s li- medicine He maintained that publication. Caricature byAndreas Steiner cense in his 70s! the true healer of the soul is a Thomas Szaz will be “doctor of persuasion,” not Viktor and I captures many ways in consensual relationship between pa- greatly missed by family, friends, and coercion. which Frankl helped others. Frankl’s tient and clinician. colleagues. His message will endure. son-in-law, Franz Vesely, a physicist, Viewing psychotherapy as a moral, Szasz noted that there was no valid Jeffrey K. Zeig notes how Frankl did collective ther- rather than medical science, he argued method to distinguish sane from in- apy--talking over the shoulder of inter- against the ways in which individuals sane, and advocated the treatment of are stigmatized by psychiatric diag- 12 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter

International Society of Hypnosis Congress The XIX International Hypnosis Congress in Bremen, Germany, was a historical event. Sponsored by The In - ternational Society of Hypnosis (ISH), organized by Bernhard Trenkle, an Er - ickson Foundation Board member and administered by his son, Andy Trenkle, it was the world’s largest hypnosis con - ference to date. There were 1700 reg - istrants and 2300 in attendance, almost 300 of which were faculty. As one might imagine, the infor - mation offered was extraordinary. Un - fortunately, the list of fascinating lectures and references to Ericksonian practitioners is more than can be sum - Camillo Loriedo turns over ISH presidency to Julie Linden. marized in this brief article. See: www.hypnosis-congress.com for the sonian approach, I was gratified men Congress a very attractive complete program. to learn that he was honored at pre-early bird price for the Paris As a member of the teaching fac - Congress with the Benjamin event and there were 250 regis - ulty, I enjoyed the opportunity to share Franklin Award, which is the trations by the end of Congress. my experiences with an international highest honor afforded by ISH Newsletter readers can also get audience. However, even more excit - Having served as president for this price of 340 euro if they ing was my role as a student, attending ISH this past year, Camillo, register before Dec 31, 2012. inspiring lectures by the world’s lead - also a Foundation Board mem - ing experts. Topics ranged from the ber, demonstrated an im - promptu utilization of technical I would suggest that anyone treatment of clinical problems, such as with a professional interest in breast cancer or OCD, to unique appli - difficulties during his keynote by discarding frozen Power - hypnosis join the world audi - cations such as children with autism or ence for the next Congress those living in extreme poverty. There Point slides to advance his gen - eral point of being more which will no doubt be a spec - were also unique perspectives on prob - tacular event. lems such as the worship of cult figures interpersonally available when or other controlling individuals who conducting hypnotherapy. Jeffrey Zeig with Camillo Loriedo. Camillo misuse hypnosis to exert undue influ - Bernhard Trenkle also was hon - Dan Short, Ph.D. received the Benjamin Franklin Award, ence by brainwashing or cult indoctri - ored as the recipient of Pierre www.iamdrshort.com the highest honor afforded by ISH. nation. Janet Award for Clinical Excel - lence. From the start of the Congress, I saw evidence of Dr. Erickson’s contin - This year’s Congress was full of uing influence on the evolving hypno - entertainment, not only in the evenings Foundation Offers Freebies sis community. In an illuminating but also during some lectures. There We might as well admit it…we all love freebies. And why not?! Don’t we pay keynote address, Jeff Zeig convinc - was wall-shaking laughter in some enough for everything else? Now the Foundation offers free items to thank our ingly illustrated the intricacy and in - workshops, and a Turkish doctor supporters and those who purchase products from the online store. creased depth that Dr. Erickson’s brought a whirling dervish and musi - approach offers when compared to tra - cians to perform as he compared Su - This year we’ve posted a free lecture by Jeff Zeig – “Exploring the Genius of ditional hypnosis. During her keynote fism with auto hypnosis. Milton Erickson -- delivered last March (to a Web and live audience) at the Cali - address, Julie Linden, the incoming I eagerly look forward to the next fornia Southern University School of Behavioral Science. Then, we gave away the president of ISH, described Ernest ISH conference, which will be held in new eBook: Milton H. Erickson by Jeffrey Zeig and Michael Munion. Also, Jean Rossi as a leading researcher who has Paris, August 26-29, 2015. Paris was Houston’s keynote address at Brief therapy ’08: “Inner Archetypes of Social Trans - helped us to better understand the fu - where the first international hypnosis formation” – a fascinating presentation on how to incorporate sensory, psycho - ture of hypnosis and how it can con - congress was held in 1889. For more logical, mythic, spiritual and unitive states to bring personal potential to social tribute to the broader field of science information on the XX ISH Congress, change at a community, professional, and cultural level. And, in memory of and genetics. As a longtime admirer of visit www.cfhtb.org. The French col - Thomas Szasz, we placed on our homepage an access link to his entire keynote ad - Camillo Loriedo’s work and his Erick - leagues offered attendees of the Bre - dress from Brief Therapy 2010. There may be no free lunch, but Foundation will let you know the next time there’s a freebie. If you are not receiving our emails and would like to be on the Check us out on Facebook and Twitter! email list, please sign up at www.erickson-foundation.org . Marnie McGann The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 13 14 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter

building) decorated the walls, as well as signed posters from Evolution Confer - ences, faculty photos, and caricature drawings by Andreas Steiner. The grand opening celebration was held to honor Dr. Erickson and thank the many donors and supporters who have helped the Foundation begin this new chap - ter. Our building at 2632 E. Thomas Rd. Ste. 200, allows for the expansion of our precious archives; provides more room for staff to conduct day-to-day operations; and serves as home to the Foundation Press. It also is a global destination for Er - icksonian practitioners. To view photos of the grand opening reception, please visit our homepage at www.erickson-foundation.org and click on the link for pictures.

Marnie McGann

NEWS & NOTES Uncommon Therapy has Universal Appeal An Evening of Celebration: Uncommon Therapy : The Psychiatric Tech - Erickson Foundation opens new offices niques of Milton H. Erickson, M.D., by Jay On Thursday, October 11, the Foundation’s doors were propped opened to wel - Haley is now available in Modern Chinese at come more than 50 guests. The air was scented with flowers and candles, and fes - www.psygarden.com.tw. tive paper lanterns glowed above. Many guests took tours of the building with Jeff Jay Haley’s book, written in 1973, is a Zeig or staff, viewed artwork and photographs, browsed the library and archives, classic in the field of psychotherapy and has sipped wine or sparkling drinks, enjoyed food, and visited with friends and col - worldwide appeal. The book provides a com - leagues. prehensive look at Dr. Erickson's theories in The “Dance of Life,” sculpture, created and donated to the Foundation by Eli - practice through a series of case studies cover - jah David Herschler, mesmerized guests as it gently twirled and reflected the sun - ing the kinds of problems that are likely to occur set light. Large-scale photos of Monument Valley and paintings donated by Irwin at various stages of the human life cycle. Pasternak of Pasternak & Associates (responsible for the interior design of the new Confluence now available in German

Confluence: The Selected Paper of Jeffrey K. Zeig is now available in German. Please visit: http://www.literatur-vsm.at/CONF/index.htm .

Marnie McGann

SM The Newsletter is Online! www.erickson-foundation.org Join our Email Mailing List! The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 15

CONFERENCE NOTES The American Society of Clinical Hypnosis (ASCH) will hold the 55th Annual Scientific Meetings and Workshop, The Triple Crown: Integrating the Mind, Body and Spirit , March 15-19, 2013 at the Marriott Louisville Downtown, Louisville, Kentucky. For information contact the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis, 140 N. Bloomingdale Rd., Bloomingdale, IL 60108; Tel, 630-980-4740; Fax, 630-351-8490; Email, [email protected] ; Web, www.ASCH.net

Psychotherapy Networker is sponsoring the 2013 Networker Symposium, The Therapist’s Craft: Healing Connection in a Digital World , March 21-24, 2013 at the Omni Shoreham Hotel, Washington, D.C. For information contact: Psychotherapy Networker, 5135 MacArthur Boulevard N.W., Washington, D.C. 20016; Tel, 202- 537-8950; Fax, 202-537-6869; Email, [email protected] ; Web, www.PsychotherapyNetworker.org

The Couples Conference will be held April 18-21, 2013 at the Manhattan Beach Marriott in Manhattan Beach, California. The Conference is sponsored by The Mil - ton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc. with organizational assistance provided by The Couples Institute, Menlo Park. Faculty will include Lonnie Barbach, Stephanie Brown, Paul Ekman, Marty Klein, Bill O’Hanlon, Esther Perel, Stephen Porges, Terry Real, Janis Abrahms Spring, Michele Weiner-Davis, and Jeffrey Zeig. Preliminary infor - mation will be available in October on the Conference Web site: www.CouplesConference.com

The American Psychological Association (APA) will hold the 121st APA Annual Convention July 31-August 4, 2013 in Honolulu, Hawaii. For more information con - tact the APA, 750 First Street NE, Washington, D.C. 20002-4242; Tel, 800-374-2721; 202-336-5500. TDD/TTY: 202-336-6123; Web, www.apa.org

The Evolution of Psychotherapy Conference sponsored by The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc., will be held December 11-15, 2013 in Anaheim, California. More information will be available in the coming weeks. Visit the Conference web site: www.evolutionofpsychotherapy.com or contact the Erickson Foundation, 2632 E. Thomas Road, Suite 200, Phoenix, AZ 85016; Tel, 602-956-6196; Fax, 602-956-0519; Email, [email protected]

The European Society of Hypnosis (ESH) in collaboration with the Italian Society of Hypnosis (SII) will hold the 13th International Congress entitled, Hypnosis and Reslience: From Trauma and Stress to Resources and Healing , October 22-25, 2014 in Sorrento, Italy (Amalfi Coast). For more information contact Societa Italianà di Ipnosi, Viale Regina Margherita, 296, 00198 Rome, Italy; Tel and Fax: (039) 06 8548205; Email: [email protected] ; Web, www.societaipnosi.it

Donations Further Foundation’s Mission Now that we’re ensconced in our John Frykman (MHE Building John Lentz new building, we appreciate even more Fund/Archives) Colleen and Wally Muller all those who have made our efforts Kristina Erickson (Museum Fund) Dr. Joan Neehall possible. Many have donated since last Robert B. Erickson (Museum Wilfrid Nkodia spring’s issue of the Newsletter -- for Fund) our build-out to be completed, the ele - Roxanna Erickson Klein and Alan Carme Timoneda-Gallart vator, the shaping of the Hayward Klein (Museum Fund) Sheean Trevor house museum, our archives, Wizard of the Desert, documentary, and for our Dennis Mattson (Museum Fund) Karen Wall general fund. All these donations have Dan Short (MHE Building Fund) And last, but definitely not least be - helped us to further our mission and we Marjorie Soroka (MHE Building cause all donations are appreciated, are extremely appreciative of each one, Fund) thank you to: Rosa Carusa, Jose Cava, large or small. Barbara and Joseph Straining Dean Couris, Kathleen Donaghy, We also are especially thankful to (MHE Building Fund) Kevin Drab, Debbie Joffe, Halim Founding Member Marilia Baker who Tracey and Stan Tatkin (Museum Faisal, Sharon Furlong, David Gillies, is a longtime contributor to the Foun - Fund) Hitoshi Kasai, Maureen Janeski, Lau - dation, Contributing Editor for the ren Jones, Arleen Leis, David Lippitt, Diane and Michael Yapko (MHE Newsletter, and invited faculty for In - Phyllis Linhart, Paula Llobet, David Building Fund/Archives) ternational Congress. London, Avrohom Kass, David Milner, We wish to thank the following We also wish to thank those who Luis Guzman Moreno, Joyce Mills, Founding Members for their signifi - have donated $100 or more, including: Rodrigo Murrer, Rebecca Peck and cant donations of $500 or more: Johann Anton Egli James Warnke. Marilia Baker (MHE Building Stella Greenhalgh Fund) Marnie McGann Oren Ilana 16 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter

5/18-19 The Erickson Way: Telling Stories Where They Belong / UPCOMING TRAINING SF Theological Seminary / San Anselmo {Marin County}, DATE TITLE / LOCATION / LEADER CONTACTS Calif. / Betty Alice Erickson, Ph.D., LPC, MFT, Eric 12/19-23 Hypnotic Patterns / Beijing, China / Jeffrey K. Zeig, Ph.D. 1. Greenleaf, Ph.D., John Dyckman, Ph.D. 9. 2013 5/1-12 Brief Ericksonian Hypnotherapy / Russia / Zeig 10. 1/10-13 Ericksonian Coaching / Sao Paulo, Brazil / Zeig 2. 5/24-17 Ericksonian Hypnosis & Psychotherapy / Guadalajara, Mexico / Zeig 11. 1/24-27 Intensive Supervision Workshop in Ericksonian Clinical Hypnotherapy - Master Class / New York City, NY / Zeig 3. 6/1-5 Hypnotic Patterns / Guangzhou, China / Zeig 12. 1/25-27 ASCH Approved Basic Hypnosis Training / (20 CEUs) / 6/8-12 Hypnotic Patterns / Beijing, China / Zeig 1. Los Angeles, Calif. / Norma Barretta, Ph.D., Philip Barretta, 6/14-15 Hypnotic Patterns / Hong Kong, China / Zeig 13. MA, MFT, David Gordon, Ph.D., Dyan Haspel-Johnson, Ph.D., Eleanor Haspel-Portner, Ph.D., Cye Hoffman, Ph.D., 7/15-19 Intensive Training in Ericksonian Approaches to Brief Ben Pomerantz, Ph.D. 4. Hypnotic Psychotherapy - Fundamental / Phoenix, Ariz. / Geary, L. Zeig, J. Zeig and Invited Presenters 7. 1/28-2/1 StoryPlay® Foundations: A New Ericksonian Indirective Model of Play Therapy / Marriott Suites Old Town, 7/22-26 Intensive Training in Ericksonian Approaches to Brief Scottsdale, Ariz. / Joyce C. Mills, Ph.D. 5. Hypnotic Psychotherapy - Intermediate / Phoenix, Ariz. / Geary, L. Zeig, J. Zeig, and Invited Presenters 7. 2/7-10 Ericksonian Methods Demystified / Potsdam, Germany / Zeig 6. 7/29-8/2 Intensive Training in Ericksonian Approaches to Brief 2/18-22 Intensive Training in Ericksonian Approaches to Brief Hypnotic Psychotherapy - Advanced / Phoenix, Ariz. / Zeig 7. Hypnotic Psychotherapy - Fundamental / Phoenix, Ariz. / Brent Geary, Ph.D., Zeig and Invited Presenters 7. Contact Information: 2/25-3/1 Intensive Training in Ericksonian Approaches to Brief 1. Email, [email protected] Hypnotic Psychotherapy - Intermediate / Phoenix, Ariz. / Geary, Zeig, and Invited Presenters 7. 2. Web, www.elsever.org 3/2-5 Brief Psychotherapy Master Class / Phoenix, Ariz. / 3. Stacey Moore; E-mail, [email protected] Lilian Borges Zeig, LPC; Jeffrey Zeig, Ph.D. 7. 4. Southern California Society for Clinical Hypnosis (SCSCH): Web, 3/7-10 Intensive Supervision Workshop in Ericksonian Clinical www.scsch.camp7.org ; Email, [email protected] ; Tel, 1-888-32 Hypnotherapy - Master Class / New York City, NY / Zeig 3. SCSCH/(888) 327-2724 4/12-14 ASCH Approved Intermediate Hypnosis Training / 5. Email, [email protected] ; Web, www.storyplayglobal.com (20 CEUs) / Los Angeles, Calif. / Barbara Freedman, 6. Web, http://metaforum-deutschland.de ; Email, [email protected] Psy.D., MFT, Gordon, Haspel-Johnson, Haspel-Portner, or [email protected] Karin Meiselman, Ph.D., Pomerantz, Peter Stone, D.D.S. 4. 7. The Milton H. Erickson Foundation – Intensive Training Program and Mas - 4/19-21 Couples Conference / Manhattan Beach, Calif. / Invited ter Class: Web, www.erickson-foundation.org/training/intensives/ ; Master Presenters 8. Class: www.erickson-foundation.org/training/master-class / ; Tel, 602-956- 6196; Fax, 602-956-0519; Email, [email protected] 5/5 ASCH Approved Advanced Training “How Classical Mindfulness Can Facilitate Hypnosis in the Treatment 8. The Milton H. Erickson Foundation, Inc., 3606 N. 24th Street, Phoenix, AZ of PTSD” / (4 CEUs) / Los Angeles, Calif. / Lobsang 85016 6500; Tel, 602-956-6196; Fax, 602-956-0519; Email, office@erick - Rapgay, Ph.D. 4. son-foundation.org ; Web, www.erickson-foundation.org ; Couples Confer - ence, www.CouplesConference.com ; Evolution Conference: www.evolutionofpsychotherapy.com 9. Eric Greenleaf: Email, [email protected] ; Web, www.miltonherickson.com 10. Email, [email protected] 11. Email, [email protected] 12. Email, [email protected] 13. Email, [email protected] To submit a listing for Upcoming Trainings, please send dates, title of work - shop, venue (city/state/country), list of presenters, and complete contact informa - tion ONLY. Information must be sent in the format above. A $25 fee per listing is required. Deadline for the 2013 Spring Issue (mailed April) is February 1, 2013. All workshop submissions are subject to approval by the Erickson Foundation. For more information, please contact Karen Haviley- [email protected] or [email protected] Insertion form including rates and ad specifications is available online: http://erickson-foundation.org/newsletter/advertise/ PAID ADVERTISEMENT The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 17 DVD REVIEW of these techniques, a longer introduc - Signaling, scaling, and post-hypnotic Rapid Hypnotic and prepare the viewer for appreciat - tory segment would have been appre - conversations were used to review the ing that induction techniques are both ciated in that it would have better client’s experiences. Within the series, Inductions: varied and individual, and that profes - delineated the target audience and the viewer can note demonstrations of sionals must find a style that suits both stressed the important foundation of dissociation, ideo-motor signaling, and Demonstrations their personality and practice needs. clinical experience. Second, there were glove anesthesia. The length of trance and Applications Filo points out that each of the tech - a few non-standard U.S. formatting is - inductions ranged from extremely brief niques demonstrated contains the ba - sues. Several computers I tried would By Gabor Filo to a ten-minute demonstration of sics of clinical hypnotherapy: Rapport. not play the DVD, but after consulting Elman’s classic technique. Crownhouse Publishing Focusing, Deepening, Re-alerting and a technician, it played perfectly on a The DVD culminated with a 15- Crownhousepublishing.com De-briefing. freestanding DVD player. United Kingdom minute film of actual dental work done 60 minutes The variety of techniques can be Filmed in his dental office, Dr. Filo with a patient in 2005. The patient de - 2012 used in a counseling office as well as engages one subject first, then another scribed a prior dental phobia. Per - Reviewed by Roxanna Erickson Klein in the dental chair. While the hands-on two subjects to demonstrate a series of formed without anesthesia, the patient RN, Ph.D., Dallas, Texas rapid style may not be the first choice brief inductions and re-arousal tech - gives a remarkable description of the of induction for the average counselor, niques. The three subjects were well procedure from his perspective. The Gabor Filo has considerable expe - it is still interesting to see that effective chosen for their obvious rapport with dental procedure, as well as the pa - rience and success in integrating ther - trance can be reached so swiftly. It also the dentist, their abilities to enter trance tient’s description of his own experi - apeutic hypnosis with his dental is reassuring to discover that effective rapidly, and their ability to express ence, offers a rare opportunity to practice. This DVD demonstrates a se - states of relaxation can be reached in their experiences clearly. witness effective work. ries of inductions and includes both settings such as dental offices where The induction procedures Filo uses Overall, I very much appreciated verbal and non-verbal approaches. It is speed is imperative. The variety of include physical contact, hand move - this DVD, and would highly recom - accompanied by a 16-page pamphlet in styles shown opens possibilities for ex - ments, eye fixation, fractionation, and mend it for both individuals who seek which the techniques are described pansion and variation of one’s own surprise, in addition to words, tone, ex - to expand their repertoire, and espe - more in depth. personal style. This DVD fills an edu - pectation, and pressure points. Once cially for professional groups who The DVD opens with three minutes cational need in making this informa - trance is induced, Filo used a variety of study hypnotic procedures and of succinct, introductory remarks spo - tion readily available. deepening techniques, analogies of processes. ken while the viewer sees a watch However, I noted two minor flaws safety, and post-hypnotic suggestions swinging. The comments are excellent in this DVD. First, prior to using some of comfort to expand the trance work. 18 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter Shift levels of dialogue in recursive tive of Bateson and Foerster, using circularity. Co-create performances these fundamentals as a conceptual with the client that are healing springboard into circularity theory. BOOK REVIEW metaphors. These metaphors emerge This leads the reader beyond, into from the wellspring of the heart. Sym - transformative circular openness, in - ditions of the Kalahari Bushmen. But, bolic images, role-playing, stories, and spired by Bateson’s metalogues and Circular the Keeneys also believe the reader poems help evoke healing. one of the two classics of Zen koan Therapeutics: should ultimately be freed from all The book has 14 interrelated chap - collections, The Gateless Gate. The models and methods to evolve by ters. A short section called “Interlude” Kalahari Bushmen and other healing Giving Therapy means of circular therapeutic improvi - follows each chapter. Each interlude traditions help to generate metaphors sation. Background is only what came comments on what the chapter ex - for this process, as well as numerous a Healing Heart before; it is not the ground the thera - pressed, often with a metaphorical recounted therapeutic dialogues with Hillary Keeney pist must walk to heal the client. The short story. The book begins with the clients. These therapeutic dialogues il - lustrate the points the Keeneys want Bradford Keeney Keeneys maintain that psychotherapy argument for letting go of modeling is an interactive improvisational per - and theory as a guide, then of theoriz - the reader to embrace. Zeig, Tucker and Theisen, Inc. formance art with spiritual depth, and Phoenix, Arizona ing itself. Early chapters describe and The last chapter is an invitation to 2012 that other models miss the point. justify the approach, and also criticize apply these teachings, epitomized in 243 pages To the Keeneys, psychotherapy is and deconstruct the narrative approach three steps: hush little puppy, move ISBN: 978-1-934442-43-2 misunderstood when considered in to family therapy. Instead, the authors around, and celebrate the change be - Reviewed by Annellen Simpkins, Ph.D. terms of any outer form. Psychother - extend an invitation to improvisational fore it has arrived. These deceptively and C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D. apy is better cast within an inner, cir - circular therapy. Entering interactivity simple steps hold the key to this subtle San Diego, CA cular, Zen-like, formless form. reframes therapy as an inescapable en - and evocative way of working. The Therapy proceeds from the heart, the tanglement between subject and object. Keeneys teach this approach to psy - Circular Therapeutics is not just a Keeneys remind us, technique is sec - The escape route is interactivity itself, chotherapists to enhance their ability to book; it is meant to give the reader a ondary; it must be woven with and avoiding either objectification as a heal. Circular therapeutics utilizes the transformative experience. The within the wisdom of healing, an an - thing or interpretation as a label or presenting problem to inspire a poetic, Keeneys draw from their own back - cient tradition whose origins are lost in name. Other chapters give tips on how freeing performance that evokes trans - ground and from great thinkers includ - the mists of time. Transformational to offer a context for metaphors that formational healing. This book offers ing Gregory Bateson with his metaphor should be created moment- lead the client away from theory, inter - a refreshing, creative, and spontaneous cybernetic theory and Von Foerster, to-moment in psychotherapy with the pretation, or labels. approach to psychotherapy. We highly who combined physics and philosophy. client during cybernetic interactivity. The Keeneys explain the general recommend it. They also touch upon the healing tra - Use intuition without plans or models. basics of cybernetics from the perspec -

PAID ADVERTISEMENT PAID ADVERTISEMENT BOOK REVIEW The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 19 Is made by how we live. Creating Consciousness: (Simpkins & Simpkins, 2009) How Therapists Can Facilitate Wonder, We highly recommend Rossi’s exceptional collection for anyone who wants to gain insight and useful tools for creating a consciousness that will facilitate neu - Wisdom, Truth and Beauty rogenesis in mind, brain, and spirit. Selected Papers of Ernest Lawrence Rossi, Volume 2, 2006-2012 Edited by Kathryn Lane Rossi Simpkins, C. A. & Simpkins, A. M. (2009). Meditation for Therapists and Their Clients . N. Y.: W. W. Norton. The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Press Phoenix, Arizona 2012 437 pages BOOK REVIEW ISBN: 978-1-932248-58-6 that can make a positive impact in Reviewed by C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D. & Annellen M. Simpkins, Ph.D. Transforming many areas of life. Instead of offering San Diego, California Negative Self-Talk: strategies to silence or argue with these Creating Consciousness , a groundbreaking springboard for progress, brings voices, this book takes a different ap - together Ernest Rossi’s most recent articles on hypnosis, psychotherapy, neuro - Practical, Effective proach: It guides us to make small science, research, art, humanities, and philosophy. Rossi is a brilliant innovator changes in how we listen to and re - who finds interrelationships that are crucial for psychotherapy. Drawn from his Exercises spond to these troublesome voices. Steve Andreas peer-reviewed journal articles, this collection is more than a scientific contribu - The book contains 11 chapters, the tion; it is also a personal odyssey. As Rossi explains, “Each chapter began as a New York: W. W. Norton titles of which nicely suggest the ter - growing edge of my own consciousness” (p. xiv). 2012 rain: Changing Location; Changing ISBN 9780393707892 (paperback) Every chapter expresses a sweeping panoramic view in fine-grain detail for Tempo and Tonality; Adding Music or 118 pages, a Song; Talking to Yourself Positively; both a macrocosm and microcosm of Rossi’s master theory. At the core, is the idea US$17.50 that we create our consciousness. Each chapter provides a piece in the master puz - Adding a Voice; Auditory Perspective; zle of how we do so, not just in a metaphorical or psychological sense, but as real, Reviewed by Michael F. Hoyt, Ph.D. Starting Your Day; Generalizations, Mill Valley, California, USA neurobiological change ongoing through the dialogue with our genes. We learn Evaluations, Presuppositions, & Dele - what kinds of experiences activate this dialogue to create a consciousness that fa - If you have been fortunate enough tions; Negative Messages & Positive cilitates a healthy mind and spirit. to attend one of Steve Andreas’ work - Outcomes; Asking Questions; and Transforming a Message. Helpful hints Rossi nicely bridges the gap between neuroscience and psychotherapy. Many shops and/or have read any of his pre - and many clinical examples from An - of the articles correlate novelty, enrichment, and exercise--qualities that stimulate vious books (e.g., Heart of the Mind; dreas and other practitioners walk neuroplasticity and neurogenesis, with key components of hypnosis, meditation, Transforming Your Self, Six Blind Ele - readers through the exercises step-by- and psychotherapy. Rossi also parallels the ancient enlightenment traditions of phants ) and/or seen some of his videos step. The book, which has an attractive Buddhism and Yoga as well as the artistic creative process. These novel experi - (samples at RealPeoplePress.com), 6x9 shape and an interesting hand-to- ences act in cyclical feedback/feed-forward patterns to change the nervous system you probably have a pretty good idea ear cover illustration, is written as a at the level of our genes, and alter how we think and feel. Dr. Erickson was stim - of what’s in store with this latest ex - self-help guide, with numerous pauses ulating these same processes with his innovative techniques. cellent volume. Andreas’ newest book is a precise, articulate, systematic ap - for readers to try the exercises. Clini - The book is divided into three parts with 13 chapters. Part One: “How We Light cians easily can select particularly per - and Brighten the Lamps of Human Consciousness,” begins with an interesting plication of change principles to a par - ticular problem—in this case, negative tinent exercises and guide clients “culturonomic” analysis, using computer search engines to reveal the new trend of through them. I have used some of supplementing hypnosis by neuroscience, genetics, and bioinformatics. A pilot self-talk. If this is your introduction, this book is also a good place to start. these exercises both on myself and study provides evidence that gene expression is stimulated following hypnother - with clients and they worked well and apy. Part Two: “An Evolutionary View of Therapeutic Hypnosis and Psychother - Andreas begins the book, appropri - quickly. Negative self-talk triggers a apy,” includes a hypnotherapeutic future-oriented approach to constructive ately enough, with an epigraph from vast array of problems, so this book memory by reprocessing the past in the present through novelty to stimulate re - Milton Erickson: “Your task is that of has wide appeal. hearsal for a more adaptive future. Rossi proposes a comprehensive research proj - altering, not abolishing.” Erickson and Helping clients alter the processes ect to explore the clinical foundations of hypnosis and psychotherapy at every level Virginia Satir were the two therapy of how they create and hold their expe - from genes to psycho-social-cultural and spiritual interactions. Part Three: “How “gurus” that Richard Bandler and John rience (imagery, feeling, meaning) ad - the Mind and Brain Co-Create Each Other Daily and Hourly,” covers mirror neu - Grinder studied when they created the dresses how the mind builds its sense rons and the emerging field of bioinformatics of art, beauty truth, creativity, and approach called Neurolinguistic Pro - of reality, and this is key to changing psychotherapy. He re-examines therapeutic suggestions through the lens of neu - gramming (NLP); and Andreas studied it. When I consider the merits of a roscience so that they become “implicit processing heuristics” and demonstrates with Bandler and Grinder. As Andreas (brief) therapy approach, I look at three how to use them to facilitate mind-body healing. explains (p. 1): “Nearly everyone has internal negative self-talk at times; things: (1) Effectiveness: Does it work, After reading this book, one will be more familiar with Rossi’s most current or more nuanced, with whom is it work. And, in addition, readers will gain a deeper awareness of the nature of their some of us have this internal chatter going on almost all the time. An inter - likely to work? (2) Ethics: Does it re - own consciousness. Rossi offers hope that we can facilitate natural evolutionary spect and enhance the client’s sense of processes at any moment through novel experiences from psychotherapy, art, and nal voice may remind us of past fail - ures, sorrows, or disappointments, self-autonomy? (3) Aesthetics: Is it in - enlightenment. We walk with Rossi in writing this poem to inspire your creating teresting and attractive, does it capture consciousness: torture us with criticism or verbal abuse, describe frightening or unpleas - the listener’s ear? On all three counts, We weave the cloth of our every day ant futures, or disturb us in other Transforming Negative Self-Talk: By what we do and give. ways.” Andreas shows how our inner Practical, Effective Exercises is a win - ner. I strongly recommend it! The fabric of our every way voices can be transformed, and how 20 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter BOOK REVIEW BOOK REVIEW

ADVENTURE role in AT (Chapter 5). In fact, many Innovations in NLP researchers found that nature is actu - for Challenging Some of the models in THERAPY ally the main therapeutic power and Times Vol. 1 the section on Innovative Theory, Research, leaders simply supplement its power. Models were so Chapter 6 provides examples of Edited by L. Michael Hall and Shelle and Practice current and past adventure therapy pro - Rose Charvet stimulating that I often Michael A. Gass, H. L. “Lee” Gilliss, grams such as prevention (e. g. adoles - Published by Crown House Publishing stopped to write down Keith C. Russell cent substance abuse). A good example UK and USA is the Adventures in a Caring Commu - Banycyfelin, Carmarthen, Wales concepts I wanted to Routledge Taylor & Francis Group First Edition nity where didactic programs promote 2011 reflection and encourage becoming 371 pages teach students or 2012 aware of external and internal assets. ISBN 978-184590734-1 use with clients. ISBN: 978-0-415-89289-6 (Paperback) 399 pages. Assessment (Chapter 7) shows how Reviewed by John D. Lentz D.Min. group experiences take place, begin - Shepherdsville, KY Maria Escalante de Smith, MA Cedar Rapids, IA ning with gathering information about Innovations in NLP grabbed me more than techniques. It was a won - the client group. A hypothesis is from the start and it was impressive to derful surprise to discover how the in - Adventure Therapy: Theory, Re - formed that will ultimately lead to the the finish. Actually, this book could be - novative models lend themselves to search, and Practice invites readers to action. The practice of AT (Chapter 8) come a volume to stimulate creativity. further innovations and precipitated learn about an interesting approach that stresses the importance of metaphor. fresh, creative thinking. The models in - uses adventure experiences provided This is a good reminder of how thera - Imagine a dream team of individu - clude Meta-States for self-reflexive by mental health professionals. It is ex - pists need to co-create metaphors with als and master NLP practitioners, each consciousness, LAB Profile to decode citing to discover that one of the an - their clients. Topics covered during writing one of the very readable 23 communications, Social Panoramas tecedents of this approach is the therapy are context, hypothesis, novel chapters in this book. Then imagine that change unconscious landscapes for emergence of Outward Bound in the action, generating, and evaluation. those folks have a depth of under - better relationships, Symbolic Model - 1960s. Chapter 9 addresses both physical and standing they want to share with you. ing for change through metaphor and emotional risks and provides ways the Now you have an idea of what this Chapter 1 introduces Adventure language, and RESOLVE Model for adventure therapist should deal with book offers. It also is a handy reference Therapy (AT) and includes the positive generative change. them. Competencies for therapists that may guide the reader to become influence of nature in the therapeutic (Chapter 10) include bricks of hard more resourceful. The authors of Inno - Applications covered coaching and healing process; the use of eustress skills, such as technical capabilities, vations in NLP explain their innovative entrepreneurial leadership, understand - (positive stress); and “the involvement and bricks of soft skills, including ef - vision and provide rigorous criteria for ing stock market wizards, wealth of adventure experiences, meaningful fective listening, integration strategies, determining what is new in NLP. Each building, overcoming addiction, stut - for the particular client, particularly in and solution-oriented processing. chapter is self-contained and is read - tering, and medical problems. Some terms of natural consequences” (p.3). able cafeteria-style for particular prob - new tools also emerge from the Mod - Chapter 2, on history, deals with AT’s Supervision (Chapter 11) is per - lems and applications. els. The Identity Compass tool is used originating concepts. “At its core, the formed in an active manner that will for coaching and recruiting. MPA history of AT is about organizations help the therapist to improve through Included in the book are new ap - MindSonar, an Xray machine for the and leaders who often began their prac - insight and the use of several pathways proaches and ideas to stimulate think - mind is applied to coaching, team tices outside the behavioral health toward a more successful therapeutic ing. The four parts of the book cover building, personnel management, and mainstream” (p. 19), such as the Boy relationship. Chapter 12 begins with a innovations in 1) Models, 2) Applica - marketing. The jobEQ is employed in a Scouts of America. Chapter 3, on the powerful quote on ethics: “Above else, tions, 3) Tools, and 4) Communities. business context. I was also pleasantly psychotherapeutic foundation, begins do no harm” (Hippocrates, p. 255). Each subsection, presented in practical surprised at the applicability of the by narrating the adventures of Dorothy This chapter is an excellent reminder and useful ways, discusses ideas that concepts, both at the clinical level and in The Wizard of Oz . This story is sym - for all therapists to reflect on values will help therapists in their practice. at the wider Community level where bolic of AT where a small group of and ethical standards. In Chapter 13, The early chapters explain the con - like-minded individuals come together. doubting individuals unable to achieve programs are evaluated to assess if cepts so thoroughly that even those Covered are the Clean Community, the their goals alone, grow as they achieve they meet goals and objectives, and with no background with NLP will un - LAB Profile Community, and the them together. promote changes. Finally, Chapter 14 derstand the techniques. The later Neuro-Semantic Community. The final AT processes typically fall into one discusses several possibilities in the fu - chapters assume a level of knowledge chapters cover NLP research projects. of two categories of interventions: pre - ture of this approach, including the re - based on the earlier ones. Innovations in NLP for Challeng - ventive or treatment (Chapter 4). sults of a survey conducted between Some of the models in the section ing Times has something for everyone Walsh and Golins (1976) present a March 27 and April 7, 2011. on Innovative Models were so stimu - and actually delivers more than is ex - model called “The Outward Bound This book is excellent. All thera - lating that I often stopped to write pected and perhaps more than can be Process” where problem-solving tasks pists should read it because they will down concepts I wanted to teach stu - absorbed in just one reading. After are set in a prescribed physical and so - surely learn techniques to improve dents or use with clients. An NLP reading this book I immediately ap - cial environment, which “impel the their skills in their professional prac - Model with a capital “M” has a hy - plied some concepts with clients and participant to mastery of these tasks” tice. I highly recommend it. pothesis that can be tested, which is, they worked even better than I had (p. 71) and help people to reorganize based in theory and can lead to distinct hoped. This book is a wonderful re - the meaning and direction of their life applications. This book offers much source and stimulating toolbox. experience. Nature plays a primary PAID ADVERTISEMENT 22 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter BOOK REVIEW

Lerner describes typical ways in which couples may be odds with one another. Marriage Rules: One way is by engaging in attempts to resolve conflict that are not in synchrony. A Manual for the Married If one partner tends to choose distancing while the other chooses to pursue, neither will be comfortable. The opposing styles clash and so conflict remains, even if the and the Coupled Up actual source of conflict is a real-life matter that could be worked out. Lerner of - By Harriet Lerner, Ph.D. fers strategies for one of the partners to cope with the other when there is a dys - functional pattern. Gotham Books 2012 We found this book to be useful and recommend it for couples to use for coun - ISBN: 978010392040691-3 sel and problem-solving. Lerner’s wisdom offers hope and reassurance. 271 pages Reviewed by C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D. & Annellen M. Simpkins, Ph.D. San Diego, California

Harriet Lerner said that she read Food Rules , a book by Michael Pollan, and felt INTERVIEW continued from page 1 inspired to write a creative book of her own on marriage rules. Marriage Rules is not a dry, structured manual for solving problems and improving relationships. In - fact that my mother put my sister and educational psychology from Teachers stead, it is a carefully crafted work that is unique and instructive for marriage part - me in therapy before the age of three. College of Columbia University in ners in many unexpected ways. Various strategies for behavior and communication Unlike other mothers of the day who New York. Then I was accepted in the are given to reduce conflict and elicit cooperation. Lerner speaks directly to the considered therapy a last resort for the Ph.D. program in clinical psychology reader in each chapter, guiding the journey of the couple through the problem area, mentally ill, my progressive Jewish at the City University of New York be - and showing a feasible way out. Reassuring advice is included in each rule, as well mother thought it was a learning expe - cause they were one of the few pro - as Lerner’s professional wisdom. rience. grams back then that didn’t ask for the EB: Really! That’s very unusual. Miller’s Analogy Test . That’s where I met and married Steve. So in retro - HL: Yes, I’m sure it had something spect, those devastating rejections to do with my early career choice. My Lerner gently advises couples with disarming turned out to be a good thing. As Steve mother had strong beliefs about how to says, “Thank you, Dr. Miller.” humor and cautions that angry confrontation raise her girls. Even during the most may not be the best way to discourage the difficult economic times, she always EB: And then? annoying behavior of a partner, even though made sure that we had four things that HF: We moved from Manhattan to she considered necessary to our suc - Berkeley where we did a pre-doctoral we all (including she) may indulge cess: sturdy shoes—and I don’t mean internship at Mount Zion Hospital in in this at times. stylish; a firm mattress; a top pediatri - San Francisco. Next, we moved to cian who was none other than Doctor Topeka, Kansas to do a two-year post- Benjamin Spock; and a therapist. She doctoral fellowship at the Menninger Lerner’s advice and insights about an issue offer structure to couples to help had a health insurance plan that let her Clinic. moderate conflict during their voyage together through life. Some of the rules ad - have these last two resources for one EB: Wow, Topeka must have dress common problems of wives, while others are for husbands. She reassures dollar per session. been a shock after New York and readers and offers hope that their relationship will improve. (A common concern EB: Can you tell our readers a Berkeley. is that there will be no improvement.) She also gives instructions for solving typ - bit about your education? ical disputes by advising what to say and what to do, and what not to say and do. HL: It was culture shock for sure. HL: After graduating from Mid - Lerner identifies faulty attitudes that may cause friction, and gives suggestions for We were always planning to move wood High School in Brooklyn, I went more constructive ones. back to New York or Berkeley after the to the University of Wisconsin in post-doc, but, we subsequently joined The 10 chapters with clever titles amuse as they enlighten. They are: “Warm Madison where I majored in psychol - the staff, and two years turned into two things up,” “Dial down the criticism,” “Overcome your listening deficit disorder,” ogy and Indian studies. I spent my jun - decades and then some. “Call off the chase,” “Fight fair,” “Forget about normal sex,” “Kid shock,” “Know ior year studying and doing research in When the Menninger Foundation your bottom line,” “Help your marriage survive step-kids,” and “Your first family.” Delhi, India. When I graduated, I was (This is followed by a short epilogue.) closed up shop and moved to Houston turned down by all the clinical psy - 10 years ago, we moved here to Each chapter begins with a general overview of the theme of a group of rules chology programs for which I applied Lawrence, Kansas, and set up a private that span an issue. The overview is coupled with reassurance and advice, and of - because of my abysmal score on the practice. I’ve overcome my coastal ar - fers ways for couples to interact that are compassionate, positive, and warm. For Miller’s Analogy Test . I was totally rogance and learned to love the big example, in the chapter “Dial down the criticism,” Lerner deals with anger and bereft and incredulous after having open skies of Kansas. I also appreciate criticism in a constructive and forgiving way so that the humanity of the couple is worked toward this goal since age five the simple life, meaning I’ve never had appreciated and respected. Both persons’ needs are taken into account to promote and because I had outstanding honors to learn to parallel park. We raised our harmony, though at times one of the partners may need to counterbalance the other and credentials. two sons in Topeka. Matt now lives in to create a peaceful moment. Lerner gently advises couples with disarming humor EB: They turned you down be - Seattle, and Ben in Brooklyn. and cautions that angry confrontation may not be the best way to discourage the cause of this one test? annoying behavior of a partner, even though we all (including she) may indulge in EB: When did you first start HL: Yes. I took the test again and this at times. If criticism must be given, constructive criticism will more likely get writing? failed spectacularly the second time as better results than derogatory outbursts. Lerner has suggestions for how to offer HL: When I was growing up in well. So I went and got a master’s in construction criticism. See INTERVIEW on page 26 BOOK REVIEW

Thinking Fast and Slow When people remember Daniel Kahneman, Ph.D. trauma, they typically Farrar, Straus, and Giroux 2011 experience the most 978-0-374-27563-1 intense moment of pain, 418 pp. plus appendices or they have a short Reviewed by Steve Andreas, MA Boulder, Colorado, USA “movie” that ends with Daniel Kahneman is the winner of a high intensity of pain. the Nobel Prize in economics and the only psychologist to win such an honor. His book, Thinking Fast and Slow , is divided into 38 exceptionally warmed by one degree, making it clear and readable short chapters, each slightly less painful. When participants of which takes up a specific experi - were asked which condition they ment or topic in detail. Kahneman would prefer to repeat, 80% preferred presents a variety of ingenious experi - to repeat the longer period of pain. The ments that support his dual system the - principle is that people tend to recall ory of how we think, understand, the pain at the ending of an unpleasant evaluate, and decide--with particular experience, in contrast to its duration . attention to biases in judgment, risk evaluation, overconfidence, and When people remember trauma, choice. they typically experience the most in - tense moment of pain, or they have a System 1 is fast, intuitive, auto - short “movie” that ends with a high in - matic, emotional, subject to bias, and tensity of pain. A ridiculously simple mostly unconscious and metaphoric. and effective intervention is to ask a An example is one’s immediate re - client to lengthen the scope of their sponse to someone who is angry. Sys - movie of a traumatic memory so that it tem 2 is slow, rational, laborious, ends at a time of less intense unpleas - unemotional, less subject to error, and antness, and thus is remembered as less mostly conscious and logical. An ex - disturbing. This experiment and the ample is the statistical calculation of many others described in the book, the probability of a plane crash. present examples of what is called the Since the dance between these two “availability heuristic.” The experience systems play out in nearly all the prob - of the ending of pain is more available lems that clients present, the content of than its duration. By changing the end - this book is directly relevant to our ing point, what is available to memory therapeutic interventions, which are is changed. (WYSIATI) most often directed at changing System Anything you can do to change the 1-- unconscious responses. experience someone thinks of in the A key principle is: “What you see problem state will change what is im - is all there is” (WYSIATI); we can mediately available to his or her aware - only construct meaning out of what we ness, and change the response. A notice, remember, or anticipate. Sim - posthypnotic suggestion is one way. ply expanding the scope and detail of Dr. Erickson’s use of a startling inter - what we are aware of, in both space ruption of an existing problem re - and time, is a powerful intervention sponse, and then redirecting attention that can change our response to events, to something else is another. As he and this is particularly true of painful once said, “Your task is that of altering, memories. not abolishing.” For example, in one experiment, I seldom recommend books, be - participants experienced two condi - cause most have little new to offer or tions. One of their hands was im - are only useful for curing insomnia. mersed in frigid water for 60 seconds. However, this book is a remarkable ex - Seven minutes later, the other hand ception. Every therapist should read it, was immersed in the same water for 60 and put it into practice. seconds, but then kept in the water for another 30 seconds as the water was

PAID ADVERTISEMENT VOL. 32, NO. 3 24 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter BOOK REVIEW

BOOK REVIEW Primer on Posttraumatic Growth: An Introduction and Guide Solution Focused Brief Therapy: By Mary Beth Wedel & Robert J. Wicks John Wiley & Sons 100 Key Points and Techniques Hoboken, New Jersey Harvey Ratner, Evan George, and Chris Iveson 2012 London and New York: Routledge (Taylor & Francis Group) 232 pages 2012 ISBN: 978-1-118-10678-5 ISBN 9780415606134 (paperback) Reviewed by C. Alexander Simpkins, Ph.D. & Annellen M. Simpkins, Ph.D. 272 pages, San Diego, California $23.95 Reviewed by Michael F. Hoyt, Ph.D., Mill Valley, California, USA We are all familiar with the theory and research about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, but there are always those people who come out of even the The authors of this excellent book--Harvey Ratner, Evan George, and Chris most traumatic situations, better than before. Now there is a growing body of sci - Iveson--are the founders of BRIEF (formerly known as the Brief Therapy Practice) ence and theory to explain why, and education on how to elicit therapeutically an - in London, the premier European, solution-focused brief therapy (SFBT) training other way to deal with trauma. and service provision agency. Longtime students and colleagues of the original In Primer on Posttraumatic Growth Wedel and Wicks present a clear and help - developers of SFBT, Steve de Shazer and Insoo Kim Berg, Ratner et al. have given ful guide to fostering a positive outcome from trauma, known as posttraumatic us an easily accessible guidebook that only could be written by experienced mas - growth. Not just a slanted reframe, posttraumatic growth is a sensitive, viable, and ters. The tone is assured, yet humble; the examples plentiful and good; and the un - robust method to guide the most traumatized client toward deep and lasting trans - derlying theory, refreshingly brief, clear, and not pedantic. The authors write (p. 3, formation. italics in original): “[SFBT] is an approach enabling people to build change in their The term posttraumatic growth was coined in 1996 by Tedeschi and Calhoun, lives in the shortest possible time. It believes that change comes from two princi - and has become a predominant theory for explaining the positive life changes peo - ple sources: from encouraging people to describe their preferred future- -what their ple can make following trauma. The theory states that we all have certain taken- lives will be like should the therapy be successful--and from detailing the skills and for-granted cognitive schemas, such as that we are safe in the world and people are resources they have already demonstrated--those instances of success in the pres - trustworthy. But a traumatic experience disturbs and upends such assumptions. ent and the past. From these descriptions, clients are able to make adjustments to Through a process of reexamining pre- and post-trauma schemas, new meanings what they do in their lives.” emerge. Solution Focused Brief Therapy: 100 Key Points and Techniques is divided The aim of the book is to work through the violation of pre-trauma schemas, into 16 parts: Background; Features of Solution Focused Interviewing; Getting through a deliberate process of ruminating and meaning-making, while sensitively Started; Establishing a Contract; The Client’s Preferred Future; When Has It Al - lowering distress levels. New interpretations and possibilities open a positive post- ready Happened?; Instances of Success; Measuring Progress: Using Scale Ques - trauma adjustment. The nine chapters clarify what posttraumatic growth is about; tions; Coping Questions: When Times Are Tough; Ending Sessions; Conducting the research that has been done; and how to guide clients toward it. Each chapter Follow-up Sessions; Ending the Work; Assessment and Safeguarding; Children, also includes a robust conclusion section with a quote to remember, clinical cor - Families, Schools, and Group Work; Work with Adults; Supervision, Coaching, nerstones, and selected references. and Organization Applications; and Frequently Asked Questions. Chapter 1 offers a history, with its roots in Victor Frankl, Carl Rogers, and pos - The authors concisely acknowledge the origins of their SFBT approach, in - itive psychology, along with the key modern theories, definitions, and implica - cluding Milton Erickson’s ideas about utilization, MRI’s emphasis on brevity and tions. In discussing those who believe posttraumatic growth might be a myth, modifying problem-forming patterns, and de Shazer’s First Session Formula Task Chapter 2 distinguishes between denial and constructive self-transcending work. and Miracle Question. The heart of the book then provides extensive guidance for Meaning is key to the process. Chapter 3 builds on Frankl’s conceptions of mean - starting and conducting interviews focused on resources and solutions. The au - ing as life’s basic motivation in order to show ways to help people find meaning thors discuss how to close sessions and promote continued progress. In addition, that overcomes loss and trauma. Chapter 4 delves deeper into the cognitive process they address applications of SFBT to various challenging situations, including do - of rumination that occurs automatically from trauma. Therapy can lead clients to - mestic violence, couples and family work, Alzheimer’s, trauma and abuse, and ward deliberation for cognitive change. Positive emotions tend to open percep - substance misuse. tion, while negative ones narrow it. Chapter 5 offers ways to manage negative “Do what works” is a basic SFBT rule. Were Steve and Insoo still with us, I am affect and encourage positive emotions using relaxation and meditation. Person - sure they would be very happy to see what their “students” have produced. Solu - ality can play a role, and Chapter 6 instructs in how to work with personality to tion Focused Brief Therapy: 100 Key Points and Techniques is a clear exposition elicit more self-esteem and better coping tools. Sensitive issues of disclosure and that embraces and builds on the original SFBT model. It also honors teachers, both support are discussed in Chapter 7 to assist clients in accepting the support they de Shazer and Berg, and ultimately their clients, by applying de Shazer’s well- need. Chapter 8 provides the research, therapeutic interventions, and tips for help - known Ockham ’s razor to explore and describe what is really essential for change ing traumatized clients open their hearts by creating a culture of forgiveness. Chap - to occur. To illustrate the principle: When someone once wrote the words “simplify, ter 9 calls forth faith and religious ways of coping with suffering, so valuable for simplify, simplify” to describe SFBT’s minimalistic approach, de Shazer famously those coming out of trauma. And the final epilogue on wisdom encourages thera - scratched out two of the words! Along with de Shazer’s 1985 Keys and 1988 Clues pists to develop their own capacities to find courage and mindful openness for and Berg’s 1994 Family-Based Services , this book ranks at the top. As a place to themselves as they also bring out these qualities in clients. start or as an elegant refresher, I enthusiastically recommend it! This book is filled with informative constructs, theories, and research that will give readers a beneficial guide for promoting posttraumatic growth. In addition, the Join our Email Mailing List! authors write with warmth and compassion to deepen one’s own empathy for www.erickson-foundation.org trauma victims and inspire a healing spirit to instill in others. We highly recom - mend this well-done book! BOOK REVIEW The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 25

The Science of facts, studies, and concepts that are Illustrations of a trust game are presented with truly useful. Trust: Emotional Gottman’s characteristic scientific mindset Gottman’s approach in working and dialogs that illustrate ways of Attunement for with couples is more than a tool of - fered in an interesting way; it is a way using the research findings. Couples of thinking. For example, he explains John M. Gottman, Ph.D. game theory as a part of trust by telling the story of two men with opposing po - so I could take notes. The concepts are scientific mindset and dialogs that il - W.W. Norton and Company sitions about the Cold War -- Von Neu - helpful and they are made more pow - lustrate ways of using the research New York and London mann and Anatol Rapoport. (Peter erful when Gottman introduces terms findings. 2011 that he and his team have coined. 480 pages Sellers mad scientist character in the While reading this book I became ISBN: 978-0-393070595-9 film Dr. Strangelove was modeled after This lengthy book of 480 pages of - infatuated with how Gottman’s mind Von Neumann.) Detailing how they fers chapters that deal with trust from a Reviewed by John D. Lentz D. Min. works. I love how he mixes science lived brought clarity to understanding Shepherdsville, KY scientific perspective with relevant with intuition, explained with the en - trust on the global level and on the in - findings for scientists. And yet, the in - thusiasm of someone who is glad to John Gottman has done it again. He timate level that facts alone would not formation also is offered from a wise, share the myriad of interesting bits of has shown why he is a leader in the have been able to illustrate. Von Neu - clinical mindset. There are chapters information that he has collected over field of couples therapy. Because of the mann’s fear made long-term relation - that deal with all aspects of trust, the years. He presents these tidy bits of research, facts, and useful clinical ap - ships impossible, and he died young. including the physiology of trust and information with a master therapist’s plications that are offered, this book By contrast, Rapoport’s belief in peo - betrayal. The book includes straight - touch. ple helped him to live a long, comfort - forward guidelines for how to work will become a standard textbook in Not only do I recommend this able, and happy life with one wife. It is with couples and even when to end a couples counseling education world - book, I will certainly encourage my no shock when later in the book relationship. Noteworthy are the chap - wide. Gottman mentions and incorpo - students to read it because in the future Gottman’s approach includes informa - ters on how to build trust as well as re - rates ideas from top professionals in much of this material will become ex - tion on Rapoport’s way of living. pair negativity and cope with betrayal. the field and brings positive insight to pected knowledge for marriage coun - Illustrations of a trust game are pre - their work. The result is The Science of I found myself wanting to read this seling. Trust is an amazing accumulation of book with a pen and pad in hand just sented with Gottman’s characteristic 26 VOL. 32, NO. 3 The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter

INTERVIEW continued from page 22

Brooklyn I always kept one of those a coma. But when I moved to Topeka, thing I wanted to say. HL: I suppose “rules” can sound a lock-and-key diaries. I wrote faithfully, necessity became the mother of com - EB: Your most recent book, Mar - bit bossy, but why not? Writing can be every night, year after year. This prehension. I got feminism. riage Rules: A Manual for the Mar - the tactic of a “secret bully,” as Joan helped me to see writing as an ordinary EB: How did you begin to write ried and The Coupled Up , came out Didion reminds us—“a way to say lis - daily activity, and to find writing com - popular books? in January of this year. What in - ten to me, see it my way, change your forting. I still have those diaries and it’s mind.” I suspect there’s a secret bully HL: I had always seen myself as a spired you to write another book? fascinating to read them. behind my light and funny touch. scholarly writer. By chance, I was in - HF: Michael Pollan’s gem of a EB: I imagine your diaries show vited to write a popular book about book, Food Rules . Pollan is a sophisti - EB: You definitely did pack a lot a great talent for writing. women’s anger, and I thought, “why cated food writer, but this little book into this book and you did a great job covering a lot of territory. I was HL: Quite to the contrary. There’s not?” especially as the invitation came contains 64 simple rules for healthful glad to see you addressed issues zero evidence of talent. This makes my with an advance of $7,000, which was eating; rules such as, “Don’t buy cereal about in-laws; step-kids; and fami - diaries valuable for teaching purposes. huge back then. But what followed was that changes the color of the milk.” lies of origin and how they impact a I bring a diary along whenever I’m in - five years of misery because that pub - While reading Food Rules I had a rush couple; and how either partner can vited to talk to students in the public lisher fired me, later rehired me, and of inspiration. I thought, “I can do this do simple things that make a big dif - schools about writing and publishing. then fired me again. Over the next five for marriage and couples. I can distill ference. What I really love is that If they’re sixth graders, for example, I you make such great use of humor. bring my sixth-grade diary. I pass it around and the students are inspired. HL: Yes, as my cartoonist friend They say to each other, “Wow, if she I wanted to write a book that would be helpful Jennifer Berman says, “Without can write a book, I can do it too!” This humor, nothing is funny.” insight is worth a lot. to one person in a couple, because often EB: And you bring in your own EB: What got you started writing only one person has her motor running for change. marriage as well. I know you’ve professionally? been married to Steve for more than 40 years. Do you follow the rules in HL: When I came to the Men - While it takes two people to couple up, your book? ninger Foundation in Topeka in the early ‘70s feminism hadn’t yet arrived. it takes only one to make the relationship HL: On my good days, but if you I was confronted with theories and a whole lot better. were a fly on the wall during my Bad therapy of women that needed revi - Marriage Days you would never buy sion, but I couldn’t convince my col - my books or show up in my consulting leagues—big surprise. So I wrote. My room. early scholarly publications were fem - years every publisher in the country re - all the theory into 100 concise rules EB: I think you did a great job inist revisions of psychoanalytic theory jected the book. I could wallpaper the that will make marriage work, or at with Marriage Rules, but no matter followed by my integration of family largest room in my house with those least give it the best chance of suc - how brilliant a book it is, it has to systems theory into psychodynamic rejection slips. ceeding.” motivate someone to act. Can a book work. change lives the way marital coun - EB: Oh my gosh! EB: So that’s how you came up EB: Did you get a lot of support seling can? HL: Any normal person would with the title Marriage Rules ? for your writing? HL: Often more so. It’s amazing have given up. It’s remarkable I kept HL: Exactly. Although admittedly, what some people can accomplish HL: Here my debt to feminism is going because I wrote and rewrote that coupling up is more complicated than when therapists get out of their way. A incalculable. Women reached out to me book on a typewriter. The very thought eating. good book can bypass resistance. over long distances, even oceans to of this makes me want to light a little EB: Any other reasons you chose Readers can run with what’s useful and support my work and to give me a candle for myself. When The Dance of this format? ignore the rest. What’s necessary is the sense of intellectual community and Anger was finally published I thought HL: I wanted to write a book that genuine wish for a better relationship, camaraderie. I should also add that the that no one would read it except for my would be helpful to one person in a and a willingness to experiment with Menninger Clinic was an international mother and my five best friends. community that was large enough in couple, because often only one person new behaviors rather than waiting for size and spirit to encompass differ - EB: I guess the sales proved you has her motor running for change. one’s partner to change first. And, of ences. It was an incredibly exciting wrong. While it takes two people to couple up, course, a good book is a great adjunct place to work. I had excellent supervi - HL: So true. it takes only one to make the relation - to a therapy process. sors and teachers, even if many of EB: And lucky for the world, be - ship a whole lot better. Also, Marriage EB: So how do you hope people them hoped that feminism was some - cause The Dance of Anger hit such a Rules is user-friendly and fun to read. are going to use Marriage Rules ? Do thing I’d outgrow. nerve and you became a voice for And men, who don’t usually read rela - you hope they’ll pick a chapter that’s EB: I imagine you became a fem - women. What books followed next? tionship books, love it. Couples oper - relevant to them or read through it ate in a time famine, and when they’re inist in New York and Berkeley. HL: The Dance of Intimacy, The and be able to remember it when under stress they can’t plow through a they’re in a tight spot? HL: In truth, I didn’t “get” femi - Dance of Deception, Women in Ther - fat, theoretical book. They need a real HL: Therapists tell me they assign nism when I lived on the coasts. I was apy, Life Preservers, The Mother go-to guide. one of those obnoxious women who Dance, The Dance of Fear, and two a particular rule to a particular client or EB: Marriage Rules uses the said things like, “I’ve never been dis - award-winning children’s books I to a couple. Readers have shared a va - word “rules” and rules are some - criminated against. If women don’t like wrote with my sister Susan. Then I riety of imaginative ways they use thing that people tend to rebel their place in life they should get out of took a 10-year break from book writ - Marriage Rules . Some couples read it against. the kitchen.” I was asleep, or maybe in ing because I thought I had said every - See INTERVIEW on page 28

The Milton H. Erickson Foundation Newsletter VOL. 32, NO. 3 27

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INTERVIEW continued from page 26 aloud to each other in bed. Other’s cause, well, I put them there. The rules are not complicated. And sometimes dog-ear one rule for their partner, each EB: You say marriage is compli - a seemingly small change can make a promising to follow the rule the other cated but your marriage rules are has chosen for them for 30 days. Or, not. Do you really believe this? like The Dance of Anger, one person big difference. It’s the direction we move in can read it and change their steps in the HL: Absolutely. The rules are not patterns that bring them pain. It’s not complicated. And sometimes a seem - over time that counts, not the speed of travel. until we move differently in a relation - ingly small change can make a big dif - ship that we can really see that rela - ference. It’s the direction we move in tionship more clearly. over time that counts, not the speed of travel. The hard part is actually doing Institute and creators of The Develop - Since 2006, Dr. Bader has led in - EB: Do you have favorite rules? something different, trying out a “new mental Model of Couples Therapy. Dr. novative couples therapy training pro - HL: I love the rules in the chapter you.” It can feel impossible to bring Bader is widely recognized as an ex - grams online. Professionals from “Forget about Normal Sex,” also, the your best self into your marriage when pert in couples therapy training. She around the world connect with her rules in the chapter “Overcome Your you’re angry and have a long list of le - has trained therapists throughout the through the internet (blog discussions, L.D.D. (Listening Deficit Disorder),” gitimate grievances. Actually, it’s not U.S. as well as in Europe, Russia, Asia, etc.) and conference calls to study “ The which is my new diagnostic category impossible. it’s just extremely difficult. South America, and Australia. Her first Developmental Model of Couples I’d like to see added to the DSM man - EB: Marriage Rules is terrific. book, In Quest of the Mythical Mate: Therapy: Integrating Attachment, Dif - ual. Of course, the rules about fighting Thank you for writing it. A Developmental Approach to Diag - ferentiation, and Neuroscience. ” fair and clarifying your bottom line are nosis and Treatment in Couples Ther - essential. And, when kids and step- HL: You’re welcome. apy , was awarded the Clark Vincent For more information visit kids enter the picture, the rules for Award by the California Association of www.couplesinstitutetraining.com/de - keeping your bearings are sanity sav - Ellyn Bader, Ph.D., and her hus - Marriage & Family Therapists as an velopmentalmodel or www.couplesin - ing. Hmmm…I guess I like all the band, Peter Pearson, Ph.D., are outstanding contribution to the field of stitute.com . rules I tucked into 10 chapters, be - founders and directors of The Couples marital therapy.