Better Times January 2017 Size
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Produced Monthly for AA Members in the Greater Toronto Area U K January O NO Y W 2017 D I that in Jan. 1961 ? spotlight on... D correspondence between Bill Wilson & Stained Glass Group Sponsorship Dr. Carl Jung The Quality of Surrender took place? The Stained Glass meeting (5:30 Friday) is like Guide A nonalcoholic considers our First Step ous sense of self-worth. Newfoundland: remote yet intimate, a place every one This is why I contended in has heard about but where not so many have been. We Step Twelve: Having had a I HAVE COME to the conclusion that the essence of an earlier article (“What’s Wrong With Elaine?” in the meet upstairs in the chapel of that little church hemmed spiritual awakening as the result sobriety--the essence of the AA program--is the First December 1978 Grapevine) that during the early phase of Step: accepting one’s powerlessness over alcohol. It is recovery, the First Step is generally taken out of compli- in by the Eaton Centre. We meet in a circle of a dozen or of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, important, however, that we understand what acceptance ance. When recovery has continued sufficiently for people so alcoholics sharing our redemptive stories of lost love and to practice these principles in all our affairs. of powerlessness means. to begin to feel good about themselves as individuals, they and recovering connections. It’s a service meeting. The Some years ago, out in Hollywood, California, I was asked to We are all familiar with drinking alcoholics’ inability to can then begin to surrender. Seventh Tradition barely covers the rent. sponsor a guy named Tom. However, I declined by informing accept their total powerlessness over alcohol, even in the It follows that since the ability to accept personal power- I love the informality of this group, the quiet acceptance him that I was only two years sober; to which Tom replied: face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Why? lessness is contingent on achieving a sense of self-esteem, of a circle where all are equal. We are at once sheep and “Well, that’s all I want!” What to do? I had been studying the If you have the quality of sur- shepherds to one another. It feels like my Creator is right Big Book step directions, so I decided it might work out if observed little chil- render will change as there weeping and smiling, truly listening to our shared we stuck to that, maybe page by page. After all, Step Twelve dren, who feel so tiny self-esteem increases. hopes, fears and druthers. doesn’t say that I am to carry my message—my sponsors in a world of giant The latter can occur I grew up in a military family, always saying “Hello” and message—what I think message, etc., but it says to carry THIS adults, you will recall when alcoholics “Goodbye”. A trailer park kid always trying to fit in rather MESSAGE—I believe that means the one in the Big Book. that they often do work the AA pro- than feeling like I belonged anywhere from from Maine to I was relieved to be off the hook, and proceeded full speed things to try to assert gram. Taking inven- California. ahead and all worked out okay. Since, I have only one authority their independence tories and revealing At Stained Glass I immediately felt welcome and in place as a sponsor: The Big Book program of action. and self-sufficien- themselves to other from my first meeting there. It is an oasis of calm, an Being a history-minded sort of guy, I have spent some cy. They will refuse persons, making island of refuge in the rapids of the city’s core. time studying the early ingredients of the AA Program of help with putting on amends and carrying Stained Glass is like Newfoundland: hard-scrabble folks their clothes; they the message--these working together to smooth the edges of life’s rocky shore. action. A place to start was that November, 1934, “kitchen table” meeting between Ebby Thacher and Bill Wilson (page will stand on a chair and the other Steps We meet every Friday at 5:30 pm. Come as you are! and point out how are the means where- 9): “Ebby told of a simple religious idea (A vital spiritual — Conrad H. big they are; they will even take risks to demonstrate their by recovering alcoholics come to build and strengthen experience), and a practical program of action (The Oxford prowess (“Look, Ma, no hands!”). As they grow and feel their characters and grow in personal stature. The better The Quality of Group’s Four Absolutes and several tenets for living). Bill had bigger, and accepting help is no longer perceived as a and more secure they feel about themselves, the more the idea that his gin would outlast Ebby’s preaching, but it did threatening revelation of their smallness, they are more profound and sincere can be their acceptance of power- Surrender not—shortly thereafter Bill was back in Towns Hospital never likely to accept and even ask for help. lessness. ...continued from page 1 to drink again. On Dec 14th, 1934, Bill, while lying in bed, In many instances, even though people are full-grown Human beings rarely remain stationary in character this does not occur, then there is reason to suspect that, went through the essential elements of our now Twelve Steps both physically and intellectually, they may nevertheless strength for any extended period of time; they either although such people are attending AA physically, they are (Page 13). feel “little.” This phenomenon of harboring unwarranted grow or shrink. If they do not grow in personality, they not working the program. They may be abstinent, but they By 1936 these ideas became what was then known as the six- feelings of inadequacy leads to feelings of insecurity, to often begin to deteriorate. There are undoubtedly many are not growing in sobriety. step program (Read Page 263). Although similar, there were low self-esteem, and to an absence of self-confidence. schemes, within religion or other systems, that can foster Although it is generally accepted that one cannot take several versions of these. Bill started writing the Big book Under such circumstances, these people may feel over- personality growth, but the AA program is one of the fin- the subsequent Steps until one has taken the First, I sub- during the spring of 1938, and by December had completed whelmed even by the routine challenges of everyday life, est and is of proved efficacy. mit that the converse is also true: that one cannot take a the writing of all Twelve Steps. However, his manuscript was and may escape from what they perceive as a formidable Continued active participation in AA should bring about ordeal into the anesthesia of alcohol. progressive strengthening of character, clearer self-aware- true First Step without the growth provided by the other altered somewhat dramatically in January of 1939 and became But it is precisely the people who feel insecure and ness, and an improved self-concept. Since this growth is eleven. And so working the program turns out to be a our Twelve Steps of today. But guess what—it worked! We inadequate who are most threatened by an admission of progressive, and since the ability to accept powerlessness circular affair, never ending--except, that is, in greater hap- then had maybe one-hundred members, but now over two- piness. powerlessness. They hang on to the delusion of omnipo- is directly proportional to the degree of positive self-con- million are staying sober by their use. tence, because recognizing an area of impotence would be cept, it follows that the quality of surrender at the end of Thank God I had these guidelines when I sponsored Tom so Abraham J. Twerski, MD too great a blow to their fragile self-esteem. Not until they two years’ sobriety should be more thorough and mean- many years ago—that was back in the late 1970s. achieve a positive sense of self-esteem can they afford to ingful than that at the end of the first year. The perception relinquish this desperate defense of the omnipotent fan- of powerlessness at the end of the fifteenth year should Copyright © AA Grapevine, Inc. June 1980. Reprinted — Bob S., Richmond, IN with permission. tasy that had served, so pathologically, to provide a spuri- be of greater depth than that in the fourteenth year. When continued on page 8... 8 BETTER TIMES January 2017 BETTER TIMES January 2017 1 mastheadannouncements & service & archives ORC 2017 BETTER TIMES is published monthly for AA members Letter from the ORC Chair in the Greater Toronto Area. Dear Friends, 234 Eglinton Avenue East, Jobs & Notices... Suite 202, Toronto, ON M4P 1K5 Your 2017 Ontario Regional Conference Telephone: 416-487-5591 Info AA Day 2017 invites members to get involved! Fax: 416-487-5855 (ORC) Committee has been working hard to TTY: 416-487-5062 make this another excellent conference. We Email: ORC 2017 website is up and running! Please check out aaorc.ca or [email protected] have spent the past year in 2016 shadowing Web: www.aatoronto.org ontarioregionalconference.ca for more information and to register. an equally amazing set of trusted servants learning how to roll out this year’s conference. Editorial Committee: Chris C. (Chair) Treatment Committee is seeking anyone interested in volunteering at the Toronto East or OCI. Over the past 74 years of the Conference VACANT (Editor-in-Chief) Volunteers are needed for both Phone Greeters (1 year of continuous sobriety and 1 phone the themes that have graced the banner and Tim S.