EDITION

2020 Talking About LGBTQ People & Equality People LGBTQ About Talking AN ALLY’S GUIDE TO GUIDE TO AN ALLY’S TALKINGTERMINOLOGY ABOUT

is clearer is clearer lesbian(s) . beinggay/lesbian/bisexual ) when talking about issues has become more widely widely more has become lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or and/or bisexual lesbian, gay, LGBT LGBTQ (or for clarity for and inclusion. LGBTQ messaging-guides identity. . is an adjective, not a noun; it is sometimes used used not a noun; it is sometimes is an adjective, to suggest that being gay, lesbian or bisexual is a a is bisexual or lesbian gay, being suggest that to “cured.” or can be changed and therefore choice, stigmatize is used to “lifestyle” the term Similarly, Just as one would people. and bisexual lesbian, gay talk about a don’t lifestyle,” “straight not talk about a “lifestyle.” lesbian or bisexual gay, “homosexual” to stigmatize gay people by reducing reducing by people gay stigmatize to “homosexual” terms. sexual purely to their lives can, in “homosexuality” about a person’s Talking purely person to of that the life reduce some cases, about Talk terms. sexual considered is “lesbianism” term the Also, instead. as an insult or slur. “gay” as is using pejorative, Reference pertain and policies that orientation both sexual to and usage, common increasingly of years Over several the meaning of However, public audiences. among broad understood unfamiliar with its some who are it can still confuse strong yet who aren’t those and alienate meaning speakingWhen with such audiences, supporters. initially using consider speakingthe media or in public, in before Also, aloud to use of these terms practicingconsider your comfort and fluency. ensure opponents is used by preference” “sexual term The Gay lesbian as a shorthand gay, encompassing term not transgender (though orientations and bisexual lesbians while many people or gender identity). Also, the term as gay, identify may when talking or women. only about a woman like equality often use words of LGBTQ Opponents Explanation www.lgbtmap.org/ when when Terms to Avoid to Terms

“gay/lesbian/ “gay/lesbian/ lifestyle” bisexual “same-sex attractions” identity” “sexual “homosexuality” “lesbianism” (a so gay.” “That’s hurtful slur) LGBTQ policy or cultural discussions are not inclusive of transgender people and/or gender identity. preference” “sexual “homosexual” (n.) (as in, “gay” “He is a gay.”) • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • “a person’s sexual sexual person’s “a orientation” “ can be a complex A person’s topic. is…” orientation “He discussed being “He discussed being bisexual.” protect that “laws people from LGBTQ discrimination” who are “people bisexual lesbian, gay, or transgender” “gay people” “gay man/men” “gay “lesbian couple” “bisexualpeople” is / ”She “He is gay.” “He is / a lesbian.” bisexual.” “She talked about lesbian/ being gay/a bisexual.” Usage Examples Usage (adj.) (n. or adj.) (n. or adj.) (adj.) Terms to Use to Terms sexual orientation sexual orientation LGBTQ, LGBT LGBTQ, bisexual lesbian, gay, and/or transgender being gay/lesbian/ bisexual gay lesbian bi bisexual, • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • GAY, LESBIAN & BISEXUAL & LESBIAN GAY, INTRODUCTION Designed for new allies who often face a confusing array of terminology and descriptions, this short this overview descriptions, and of terminology an array guide offers a confusing often allies who new face for Designed see talk about various issues, can be used to that approaches messages and For vocabularyof essential use and avoid. to at online collection resources guides and of messaging MAP’s TALKING a powerful impact have people and issues can (LGBTQ) and transgender bisexual gay, talk about lesbian, use to we words The right The lives. particularly talking LGBTQ familiar with as not to comes it when are who those with conversations, our on or confusion. distance can create hearts while other words and minds, can help open people’s words ABOUT people understandwhat itmeansto betransgender, read gender theyhave always themselves known to be, transition andoften to livingasthat gender. For more information onhelping expression isdifferent fromAt somepoint intheirlives, theirsex at birth. transgender peopledecidetheymustlive theirlives asthe The term TRANSGENDER • • • • • • • • • • • • • • (adj.) transgender female as eithermaleor doesn’t identify someone who binary gender non- not transgender people whoare transition expression gender gender identity Terms to Use transgender

refers inside)orgender personknows to (thesenseofgenderthat every peoplewhosegenderidentity Usage Examples myself to be.” man I’ve always known and now Ilive life asthe from female to male, years agoItransitioned I was male.knew Many a girl, butinsideIalways I was andraised born as “I’m atransgender man. who are transgender” “protecting people advocate” “transgender “transgender woman” “transgender man” “transgender person” a boy. shetransitions So was andraised born as a girl, even thoughshe grows she’s upknowing “A transgender woman expression.” andgender identity treatment basedon “fair andequal me.” that wasn’t truefor male orfemale, but that they’re either fromknow childhood binary. people Most “I’m gendernon- people alike” and non-transgender “transgender people to live asawoman.” • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • “tranny” “transvestite” “” (n.) “a transgender” (n.) “transgendered” unfamiliar audiences) (for broad and/or without “gender” standalone term non-binary strong supporters) those whoare notyet “” (with “post-operative” “pre-operative” / operation” “sex-change “sex change” identity termcorrect is “sexual identity” (the

Terms to Avoid Talking Transgender About People &Restrooms ) asa gender

Explanation While terms like may notbeunderstood by unfamiliaraudiences. The term (seebelow). prefer, usepronouns consistent withtheperson’s it isn’t possibleto askwhat pronouns apersonwould ask what pronouns theyuse(e.g., he, sheorthey) Always useatransgender person’s chosenname connotes acondition ofsomekind. unnecessary “-ed” to theterm (“transgendered”), which not to callsomeone “a transgender.” notaddan Do Transgender direction oftransitiondirection (seeUsage Exampleto theleft). Consider these terms with pairing a reference to a person’s transgender man is a man who identifies as a woman. for Unfamiliar audiences example, think, often that a are commonly used, theyare notuniversally understood. non-binary peopleusethepronouns non-binary others don’t identify witheithergender. Many gender identify asablendofmaleandfemale , while don’t fitinto maleor female gendercategories.Some language—e.g., “People who are gender non-binary Help peopleunderstandwhat itmeansusingeveryday unfamiliar audiences becauseitisnotself-explanatory. The term clear andrelatable instead (seeUsage Example). unfamiliar audiences. Use everyday languagethat is The term “cisgender” tends to confuse andalienate first referencing that apersonistransgender. transition (for example, from female to male)when canalsobehelpfulto aperson’s clarify It of direction transgender people donotorcannotundergo. on aperson’s anatomy oronsurgeries, whichmany Transition referring to terms canbeunfamiliarandconfusing to many people; expresses that gender)are notinterchangeable. These gender) and The terms simply identify asmaleorfemale, withoutmodifiers. women are women, sometransgender peoplemay transgenderBecause menare men,andtransgender whoistransgenderNot everyone identifies that way. trans, istheaccurate term that doesnotfixate gender non-binary transgender people isanadjective, careful notanoun.Be gender identity gender expression often usedwithintheLGBT often community, transgender man (one’s internal sense of canconfuse andalienate (how apersonoutwardly is often clearer. isoften (see backcover). and transgender woman they and them —and .” . If If TALKING ABOUT their their — people and people and transgender transgender For example: example: For . © 2017, 2020 Movement Advancement Project (MAP). Project Advancement . © 2017, 2020 Movement religious exemptions, exemptions, religious otherwise ground. be common name-calling. into descend anti-LGBTQ Calling Don’t those can alienate “hateful” or “bigoted” opponents Instead, with the issues. wrestling honestly who are to and relatable is measured use language that discrimination and a sense of how empathy create and their families. people hurts LGBTQ support and faith traditions people religious Many unfairlylanguage that paints Avoid people. LGBTQ or or denomination, tradition religious an entire or as being anti-LGBTQ broadly, more religion extremist. Avoid talking about “rights,” “civil rights,” or making rights,” “civil “rights,” talking about Avoid kinds direct different between comparisons to of discrimination, especially when it comes Such comparisons discrimination based on race. Americans and others, African many can alienate would unnecessary there where creating distance Explanation www.lgbtmap.org/messaging-guides Terms to Avoid to Terms

“hate” / “haters” / / “haters” / “hate” “hatred” / / ”bigots” “bigot” “bigotry” “prejudice” “anti-LGBTQ extremists/religious extremism” “anti-LGBTQ Christian groups” “rights” rights” “civil / rights” “gay rights” “LGBTQ • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • se language that emphasizes our common values, beliefs, hopes and dreams hopes beliefs, values, our common emphasizes se language that u for more resources on talking about resources more for to judge.” to “the hurtful rhetoric of activists” anti-LGBTQ “Everyone, including should people, LGBTQ fairly and treated be of the laws equally by our state.” people “Protecting is discrimination from others about treating be to want as we me not for It’s treated. Usage Examples Usage messaging-guides MAP’s GUIDES TO TALKING ABOUT LGBTQ ISSUES ABOUT LGBTQ TALKING TO GUIDES MAP’s affect people and the issues that (LGBTQ) and transgender bisexual about lesbian, gay, conversations is one in a series on building effective documents of This visit versions, and downloadable resources more For lives. Terms to Use to Terms www.lgbtmap.org/ anti-gay/anti- transgender/anti- activists LGBTQ opponents rejection exclusion unfairness fairly and equally discrimination fair, equal treatment fair, people treating • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • ADDITIONAL RESOURCES ADDITIONAL Visit Visit and much more. populations, suicide and LGBT youth, transgender and family acceptance restrooms, GENERAL TERMINOLOGY & APPROACHES: TALKING ABOUT LGBTQ ISSUES LGBTQ ABOUT TALKING APPROACHES: & TERMINOLOGY GENERAL transgender, have a fair opportunity to provide for themselves and their families, live free from discrimination, and build a better life.” discrimination, and build a better from free live opportunity a fair their families, and have for themselves provide to transgender, and which reminds people that LGBTQ people are everyday Americans who live everyday lives. lives. everyday who live Americans everyday people are LGBTQ people that and which reminds “The in is a land of opportunity I believe the chance America have their responsibilities and meet hard people who work where freedom, and or bisexual lesbian, gay who are including those that all people, help ensure Updating nondiscrimination law would our get ahead. to to ignore or dismiss the discrimination and other harms that LGBTQ people face. people face. LGBTQ and other harms the discrimination or dismiss that ignore to people, talkingWhen LGBTQ about equality for TALKING ways compelling emotionally genuine, we can talk in when most effective equality people and are about LGBTQ Conversations is that people and equality in a way they can support people how Showing LGBTQ connect of our audience. that with the values difficult feel. more it makes It also conflictinner may they any through work people can help values and beliefs their with consistent ABOUT