Abiding Our Own Minds

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Abiding Our Own Minds Harvard Jan 2012 - FINAL_Layout 1 11/14/2011 3:03 PM Page 1 EXPLORATIONS Abiding Our Own Minds Regional retreats offer quietude and the promise of insight. • by Nell Porter Brown The Insight IMS’s Forest Refuge Meditation Society THE MESSAGE F BERT; THEBERT; ABODE O Al /LOU IMS TER; N E P AR C Y L MI E / IMS T: T: F E ousan aBadian, a fellow at MIT’s Da- to reflect, away from L ROM lai Lama Center for Ethics, has trav- the hubbub, New F eled as far as the Amazon River and England offers a sur- OCKWISE the mountainous peaks of Peru seek- prisingly wide array Cl The Abode of Sing spiritual growth. “My most powerful of sanctuaries and the Message retreats,” she reports, “have been those I’ve retreats, from those done in the natural world, sometimes in my run by Buddhists and Sufis and traditional selves in relation to the world,” says Bos- own backyard, where I have basically sat for Western religious groups to others repre- ton psychotherapist Christopher Germer, hours at a time, sometimes days.” senting different kinds of spiritual or ethical a clinical instructor in psychology in the These meditations, practiced alone or organizations, such as Sirius, a regional off- department of psychiatry at Harvard with a group, have helped quiet her “in- shoot of the Scottish Findhorn Foundation. Medical School and a practicing Buddhist. ner dramas” and her active academic mind. Most promote spiritual learning through A founding member of the Institute for (Abadian, A.M. ’87, M.P.A. ’88, Ph.D. ’99, fo- quietude in a natural setting. Visitors are Meditation and Psychotherapy (www. cuses on the impact of collective trauma on generally expected to respect an atmo- meditationandpsychotherapy.org), Germ- indigenous peoples; see “Trail of Tears, and sphere focused on reflection, prayer, and er has attended countless retreats and Hope,” March-April 2008, page 39.) “When worship, or even maintain strict silence. The now leads them for fellow psychothera- we are so busy in daily life, we are not con- degree of religious adherence varies; some pists through both the institute and the Essex Street scious of the other messages we get, particu- retreats emphasize scriptural teachings and Barre Center for Buddhist Studies (www. Answers larly from our hearts and souls and bodies,” private consultation with spiritual advisers, dharma.org/bcbs), in western Massachu- she asserts. “Retreats allow us to access and while others focus on devotional practices setts. (He and Ronald D. Siegal, assistant strengthen subtle capacities and to hear related to meditation, ecological commu- clinical professor of psychology at HMS, ourselves and others on a different level.” nion, yoga, or other mind-body exercises. have co-edited Wisdom and Compassion in As Abadian has discovered, one need not In the Buddhist tradition, retreats are Psychotherapy: Deepening Mindfulness in Clini- travel to exotic locales to turn inward. For considered “‘deeper practice’ that help us cal Practice, forthcoming from Guilford individuals who want some time and space to reconfigure our sense of self and our- Press, which was inspired by a 2009 HMS 12d January - FeBruary 2011 120109_Cabot.indd 1 11/21/11 12:30 PM NEW ENGlanD REGIOnal SECTION Find solace Visit harvardmag.com/extras for a list of more New England sanctuaries. conference on the subject attended by the Dalai Lama and scholars, scientists, and therapists from across the country.) “Mindfulness has become probably the dominant paradigm of psychotherapy,” he says. Those in the field attend retreats themselves to learn how to meditate and apply the practice to working with pa- tients. “They also come to be refreshed and Document1Document1 11/20/03 11/20/03 11:51 11:51 AM AM Page Page 1 1 Document1 11/20/03 11:51 AM Page 1 renewed—to manage fatigue,” he explains. “Caregivers need to care for themselves.” Atlifecare Brookhaven living is as good as it looks. Generally, people “in any denomination Brookhaven at Lexington offers an abundance of opportunities for are entering a retreat to feel better,” Germ- intellectual growth, artistic expression and personal wellness. Our residents er says. In his estimation, every retreat, share your commitment to live a vibrant lifestyle in a lovely community. regardless of its spiritual orientation, prob- ably alters our sense of self—whether in Call today to set up an appointment for a tour! relation to a specific struggle or source of A Full-Service Lifecare Retirement Community grief, to the universe, to God, or as a means www.brookhavenatlexington.org of loving and living more compassionately (781) 863-9660 • (800) 283-1114 with others. “Just like spokes on a wheel, Gonzaga Eastern Point Retreat House ASSISTEDASSISTEDLIVINGLIVINGRETIREMENTRETIREMENTCOMMUNITYCOMMUNITY ASSISTEDRetirementLIVING RETIREMENT CommunityCOMMUNITY www.easternpoint.org Here’sAssisted what Living people are 978-283-0013 Here’sHere’s Memorywhat what people peopleCare are are sayingsaying about about us. us. Gonzaga Eastern Point Retreat saying about us. House, run by Jesuits in an old stone What Do Harvard Alumni mansion on the ocean in Gloucester, Have in Common? Massachusetts, “is known for its sacred silence,” says its director, Father John Cadbury Commons P. Murray. “And most people would say An Uncommon Senior Residence that it is in the silence they meet God.” Retreats lasting from four to 30 days follow the Spiritual Exercises drawn up by Our programsName:Name:Milton willMilton R.engage R. your Occupation:interests,Occupation: Name:ourPostalPostal professional Supervisor,Milton Supervisor, R. Retired Retiredstaff Saint Ignatius of Loyola (founder of the Hobbies:Occupation:Hobbies:Reading,Reading,Postal Walking, Supervisor, Walking, Exercising Exercising Retired Jesuits) in the early 1500s, based on his isHobbies: sensitiveReading, to your Walking, needs. Exercising Lifestyle:Lifestyle:Independent,Independent, Active Active own conversion experience. Retreatants ChoiceChoiceLifestyle: of Senior/Assisted of Independent,Senior/Assisted Living: Active Living: ChoiceCadbury ofCadbury Senior/Assisted Commons Commons Living:th meet daily with a spiritual director, at- Cadbury Commons tend communal worship and mass, and “There“ThereHappy is a isstable a stable and and gentle375 gentle atmosphere atmosphere of “Therehelpof help isand a andstableempathy empathy and throughoutgentle throughout atmosphere the the are free to pray in a chapel or to find community.ofcommunity. help Iand feel I feelassuredempathy assured that throughout thatI am I partam part ofthe of comfortable nooks throughout the others’community.others’ lives,Anniversary lives, as I theyfeel as theyareassured ofare mine. ofthat mine. For I am Formyself, part myself, of I feelothers’I feelthat lives, thatCadbury asCadbury they Commons are Commonsof mine. provides For provides myself, a a beautiful, very large house. “The whole wellHarvardI well feeltrained trainedthat and Cadbury andcaring caring groupCommonsCollege! group of people ofprovides people who whoa key to the Spiritual Exercises is freedom,” arewell interestedare trained interested in and my in caring welfare.”my welfare.” group of people who are interested in my welfare.” Murray says. “The interior freedom... CallCall (617) (617) 868-0575 868-0575k to arrange to arrange a personal a personal may include the use of music (through tour,CallCalltour, (617) or(617) visit or 868-0575 visit868-0575 www.cadburycommons.com www.cadburycommons.com to arrangeto arrange a personal a personal tour, tour,or or visit visit www.cadburycommons.com www.cadburycommons.com headphones) and books and art. So we WhereWhere The The Emphasis Emphasis Is On Is OnLiving Living Where The Emphasis Is On Living provide a spiritual library. We have three 66 Sherman6666 Sherman Sherman Street, Street, Street, Cambridge, Cambridge, Cambridge, 66 Sherman Street, Cambridge, EQUAL EQUAL MA 02140◆ ◆ (617) 868-0575 HOUSING HOUSING MAMA 02140 02140 (617)• (617)868-0575 868-0575 OPPTYEQUALOPPTY ◆ HOUSING MA 02140 (617) 868-0575 OPPTY 12F January - FeBruary 2011 Re ond al E m st m a a t e H NEW ENGlanD REGIOnal SECTION YEARS 00 we all end up in the same hub; ultimately 33 1 1 981 201 everyone gets to the same place through - a committed practice,” he explains. “The question that may arise is: What is the best path? And the answer is: The path you are most committed to.” Spiritual retreats are not spa vacations. They do not typically involve fluffy-towel pampering and pedicures, much less per- sonal computers or electronic communica- tions; many even prohibit books and music. Germer says silent retreats in particular raise the essential question: How do I abide Cambridge...For Lease: 8,400 square- Cambridge...Located on 1/2 acre off Brattle my own mind? “As writer Anne Lamont foot building in the heart of Harvard Street, the “Arthur Astor Carey House,” says, ‘My mind is a neighborhood I try not Square. Perfect for consultants, school, c. 1882, has 15 rooms, including 8 BR, study, or non-profit. pantry, breakfast room, and a 500 sq. ft. to go into alone.’” great hall. A rare and historic landmark in a Entering into silence or quietude for most desirable location. $5,000,000 even a few days, Abadian notes, shuts off the usual avenues of distraction: family and job duties, the Internet, household chores. She has spent formative time at The Abode, a Sufi retreat center in New Lebanon, New York, walking trails and sitting in silent meditation. “When you get rid of all your outer distractions,” she explains, “your in- chapels where the Blessed Sacrament is observed. The dining room faces the Lexington...Elegant Shingle Style treasure Belmont...2- to 3-bedroom condominium ocean and also has many places for peo- on coveted Follen Hill. 4BR, 3.5BA, overlooking park on dead-end street. ple to sit quietly and write.” sunroom, library, original detail, mahogany Renovated bathroom and granite eat-in Meals are communal and accompanied 2-level deck and garage.
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