Newsletter 44

Home , Citrus Bowl, Hello 2021, Mike McGear

Newsletter Hartlepool & District U3A New Year Edition, Issue 44, January 2021

Happy New Year! Happy New Year! Happy New Year! Happy New Year!

Comments from the Chair

First of all, greetings to you all and I hope you enjoy the festive period Things are definitely looking more optimistic for the new year with more vaccines becoming ready for distribution. I know that some of our members have already had their first jab, so things are definitely going in the right direction.

It is important not to get too far ahead of ourselves as it will be a huge undertaking to get everyone vaccinated before we can return to something approaching normal life. With this in mind, the Committee has decided that we need to hold the AGM that has been held over since June. Obviously, we cannot have a face-to-face meeting so we will be holding a 'virtual' AGM on Friday February 5th 2021 at 2 pm. We will be sending out all the relevant documentation required in mid-January by email and by post to give you all plenty of time to scrutinise them.

The virtual meeting will be held via Zoom and every member is invited to join. We want to encourage as many members as possible to join and we can offer help if you need it. Phil has kindly offered to help members who are new to Zoom the week before the AGM. Further details will follow. By the time you read this, the latest TAT newsletter will have been sent out and you can also book Introduction to Zoom sessions via a link in this latest edition.

The Zoom AGM take place in the afternoon and we need a quorum to make it legal. If there are not enough members present at first, we will take a short break and then recommence. Whoever is then present will make the meeting quorate. We have guidance from the Charities Commission and the National Office that in these extraordinary times a great deal more leeway is allowed than usual.

You need to vote on electing a new Committee and approving the Annual Report and Accounts. You will be able to do this at the AGM itself, online or by post. Please do your best to participate in whatever way you can. Your vote is important! Roger Say Chair

Hartlepool & District U3A. Registered Charity No 1153641. www.u3asites.org.uk/Hartlepool Page 1

The A-Z of New Year Barry Liddle

The aim of this light-hearted article is to explore all the weird and wonderful things we associate with New Year and New Year’s Eve in this country and across the globe. Cheers, and Happy New Year!

uld Lang Syne is the song most of us will associate with New Year. It is based on a Scots- language poem written by Robert Burns set to the tune of a traditional folk song. It is often A sung at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve to bid farewell to the old year. There are several verses, but the first verse and chorus of the standard English version are the most popular amongst New Year revellers.

Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintance be forgot, and auld lang syne? Chorus: For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne, we'll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne.

is for Babies born on New Year’s Day – photographs of which are a popular feature in most local newspapers. B is also for Bach (Johann Sebastian), who in n the Orgelbüchlein, composed B three chorale preludes for the new year: Helft mir Gotts Güte preisen ("Help me to praise God's goodness"); Das alte Jahr vergangen ist ("The old year has passed"); and In dir ist freude ("In you is joy").

elebrating New Year’s Eve around the world involves a combination of some of the following - going to church, having family meals, gift giving, lighting fireworks, parties, celebratory drinks C and counting down the clock to midnight. However, in addition to these activities, celebrations can also include some local customs and traditions. These are just a brief selection:

• New Year's Eve is celebrated in Chile by wearing yellow underwear and yellow clothing. It is said to restore vitality to the person’s life. • There are several traditions among Costa Rican families, including eating 12 grapes representing 12 wishes for the new year, and running across the street with luggage to bring new trips and adventures in the upcoming year.

eutschland. In Germany, people exchange small gifts that are supposed to bring good luck for the new year, like marzipan pigs or four-leaf clovers. There's also a tradition of melting little D lead figurines and casting them into water to read your coming year's fortune. cudor. A New Year's Eve tradition in Ecuador is for men to dress in clumsy looking drag to stop cars in the street. In return for some coins, they allow the driver a safe passage through the E street.

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irst Foot. The ‘first-foot’ is the first person to enter the home on New Year's Day and is seen as a bringer of good fortune for the coming year. Similar practices are also found in Greek and F Georgian new year traditions. Traditionally, the ‘first foot’ should be someone who was not already in the house when midnight struck – hence the Scottish party tradition (and a tradition common in Hartlepool) of having one guest leave just before the bells so they can knock on the door as the new year begins. In our Hartlepool household the ‘first foot’ would always be given a piece of silver and would cut the New Year Cake.

inger Wine (Non- Alcoholic), Going down ‘memory lane’ to when I was a boy both my gran and my mam used to make a non-alcoholic ginger wine in the lead-up to New year. And this G is what youngsters - allowed -up to see in the New Year - would drink with a slice of New Year’s cake. The ginger wine had a pleasantly sweet taste, but the ginger would always catch the back of your throat. In our house it has used as a reviver in cold weather and the occasional glass was offered to the milkman on cold mornings.

ogmanay is the term for New Year’s Eve in Scotland and the celebrations that can take place at this time. This joyful gathering which can continue for days, was especially strong in the H years when Christmas itself was ‘banned’ in Scotland (this took place in 1640 by order of the Parliament of Scotland and Christmas only became a public holiday in 1958 and Boxing day in 1974.)

taly. In Italy, New Year's Eve is celebrated with traditional rituals, such as wearing red underwear. An ancient tradition in southern regions which is rarely followed today, was disposing of old or I unused items by dropping them from the window. apan. In Japan, New Year's Eve is used to prepare for and welcome Toshigami, the New Year's god. People clean their homes and prepare Kadomatsu (traditional Japanese decoration) or J Shimenawa (lengths of laid rice straw or hemp rope used for ritual purification in the Shinto religion) to welcome the god before New Year's Eve.

orea. There are two New Year’s Days celebrated in both North and South Korea, which are the Lunar New Year and the Solar New Year. The Solar New Year are always celebrated on the first K day of January while Lunar New Year varies. In both Koreas, they call New Year's Day (Seoll- Nal). They eat a special soup called (Tteok-Guk) which is a hot soup with thin, flat rice cakes and most of the times, eggs are inserted.

ondon. London leads the New Year celebrations in England. The London New Year’s Eve Fireworks are often the first item on the news bulletins on TV the next day – together with L Edinburgh, Sydney and other capitals across the world. London’s New Year's Eve firework display is celebrated along the Victoria Embankment and South Bank areas of the River Thames where the London Eye and Big Ben are situated. The countdown is accompanied by the chimes of Big Ben, and a digital countdown timer projected onto the Shell Centre. The fireworks are launched off the London Eye and from barges in the River Thames at midnight. The event draws huge crowds or at least it did until Covid-19 raised its ugly head.

exicans celebrate New Year's Eve, by eating a grape with each of the twelve chimes of a clock's bell during the midnight countdown, while making a wish with each one. Mexican M families decorate homes and parties in colours that represent wishes for the upcoming Hartlepool & District U3A. Registered Charity No 1153641. www.u3asites.org.uk/Hartlepool Page 3 year: so, for example red encourages an overall improvement of lifestyle and love, yellow encourages blessings of improved employment conditions, green for improved financial circumstances, and white for improved health. Mexican sweet bread is baked with a coin or charm hidden in the dough (rather like the old custom in this country of putting coins in the Christmas pudding). When the bread is served, the recipient of the slice with the coin or charm is said to be blessed with good luck in the New Year. Another tradition is to make a list of all the bad or unhappy events over the past 12 months before midnight, then the list is thrown into a fire, symbolizing the removal of negative energy from the new year. ew Year Resolutions. The consensus is that New Year's resolutions date back roughly 4,000 years, to the Babylonians. Ever made a ‘New Year Resolution’? Most people have at some N stage in their lives, although it is generally believed that relatively few resolutions are kept over the following weeks and months. A classic example being ‘Gym Memberships’.

utback Bowl in Tampa, the Citrus Bowl in Orlando, the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, and the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans are major post-season American Football games played on New Year’s O Day in the United States of America. owderhall Sprint, now known as ‘The New Year Sprint,’ is the name of a handicap sprint race for professional athletes that takes place on New Year’s Day each year in Scotland. The sprint P is one of the original events of this type, tracing its history back to 1870. Its popularity was at a hight when the race was run for money prizes before the late 1970s when mainstream athletics was amateur.

ueen Elizabeth together with other members of the Royal Family traditionally spend New Year at Sandringham House in Norfolk. Although in this year of Covid-19, the Queen is spending Q New Year at Windsor Castle. wanda, New Year's Eve is celebrated mostly by going to church, taking part in social gatherings and family activities. The services usually start from 6 pm for the Roman Catholic church and R 10 pm for the Protestants. At 00:00, the president delivers an end-of-year address which is broadcast live on many Radio and Televisions stations.

wimming in the Sea sometimes called a “New Year’s Day Dip” in England or a "polar bear plunge" in North America is a common tradition, where participants gather on beaches and run S into the cold water. Many Northern Hemisphere cities have a tradition of holding organised dips on New Year's Day and they are often held to raise money for charity -examples include Alnmouth and Whitley Bay. In Hartlepool, the charity swim in the North Sea is usually held a week earlier on Boxing Day.

ime Zones. Due to different time zones across the globe, New Year is first celebrated on the small Pacific island nations of Tonga, Samoa, and Kiribati. New Zealand follows next in T celebrating the New Year, followed by Australia, Japan, and South Korea, while the last place to celebrate New Year is Bakers Island which lies in central Pacific Ocean.

kraine. In Ukraine, New Year's Eve has the same cultural significance as Christmas in Hartlepool, but without the religious connotations. Ukrainian families traditionally install U spruce trees at home, the equivalent of a Christmas tree. Families gather to eat a large feast Hartlepool & District U3A. Registered Charity No 1153641. www.u3asites.org.uk/Hartlepool Page 4 and reflect on the past year. They have a large celebration, make toasts, and make wishes for a happy New Year. Families give presents to their friends as well as informal acquaintances. As Ukrainians are traditionally a close-knit community, it is seen as a taboo to not give presents to those the family associates with. Children stay up until midnight, waiting for the New Year. During these celebrations, many Ukrainians tune to special New Year shows, which have become a long-standing tradition for Ukrainian TV. And just before midnight the President of Ukraine gives his New Year's message to the nation, and when the clock strikes 12, the National Anthem is played in all TV and radio stations as well as in Independence Square in Kyiv and other cities where holiday celebrations are held.

ienna Philharmonic Orchestra traditionally performs a New Year's concert on the morning of New Year's Dayi. The concert is held in the Musikverein, the centre of classical music in Vienna. V The Grand Hall is also called the Golden Hall. It is considered to be not only one of the most beautiful halls in the world, but also one of the best in terms of acoustics. The concert is broadcast live on British TV and is very popular with those members of the household who did not overindulge on the New Year Celebrations.

elsh New Year The Welsh tradition of giving gifts and money on New Year's Day (Welsh: Calennig) survives in modern-day Wales, though nowadays it is now customary to give W bread and cheese. Traditionally children would go from house to house wishing all a happy new year, usually by singing short verses such as, ‘Blwyddyn Newydd Dda i chi, and his would be done before midday and the children would receive gifts of bread and cheese or a new coin for their trouble. The custom’s origins can be traced back to the Middle Ages but the first instance of Calennig in its present form was recorded in the nineteenth century. It was customary for the children to carry with them apples decorated with corn and sprigs of evergreen which represented the health that they wished in their verses. This part of the ritual was later forgotten, and the children merely sang their verses in return for small gifts.

ila is the Chinese language name for Greece. A common tradition among Greek Orthodox families is the cutting of a vasilopita ("King's pie" or "St. Basil's pie") at midnight. A coin or X similar object is usually baked inside, and whoever finds it is said to have luck over the next year. New Year's Day is considered a feast day for Basil of Caesarea, and it is also considered a custom to reserve the first slice of the vasilopita for St. Basil.ii

emen New Year's Day is a public holiday in Yemen that commemorates the first day of the new year according to the Gregorian Calendar.

imbabwe celebrates New Year- which is a public holiday.

Z References. Principal Reference- Wikipedia. Secondary references: National Trust for Scotland.

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The Gardening Column - January Geoff Law

January for most gardeners is a month of little activity. There are exceptions of course for those who have greenhouses and are over wintering plants or have planted seeds for an early crop but for most of us, we content ourselves to becoming indoor gardeners.

This is the season of bulbs grown in pots and we look forward to the spectacular flower stalks of the amaryllis or the scent of the flowers of the hyacinths and these are followed by the shops selling seasonal cut flowers of daffodils and tulips.

My wife’s favourite cut flower of springtime is the tulip but for years we suffered from the same problem. After a few days, the stems of the flowers would change from being upright to being bent. We tried numerous locations in our house to vary the temperature and the light levels but the result was always the same, after a few days our upright flowers drooped.

I discovered the solution to the problem whilst in the Netherlands. I had not realised that, unlike most other cut flowers, after they have been cut the stems of tulips continue to grow so if you put them in a vase with a good quantity of water the flowers find it easy to absorb the water and without the restraint of the bulb grow weak and bend.

The solution is simple. Put the flowers in a vase where you can see the water level and add just enough water for the day. You have to check the level daily, but you should have a display that will last for a few weeks.

Recipe of the Month: Chicken Tarragon (Serves 4) Jessica Scott

Ingredients Method

• 4 Chicken breasts (if large only use 3). • Mix lemon, paprika, garlic & tarragon in a • Juice of 2 Lemons. bowl. • 2 teaspoons of Paprika. • Cut chicken into strips and add to the bowl • 1 crushed Garlic Clove. to coat it and leave for one hour to • 1 tablespoon chopped Tarragon (or half a marinade. teaspoon of dried Tarragon). • Then welt butter and fry chicken 5-10 • 2 ounces of Butter. minutes gently and stir. • 12-14 Sun Dried Tomatoes (from a jar • Cut tomatoes into strips & add to the pan for containing olive oil). 5 minutes then take the chicken out of the • ½ pint of Double Cream (you can add the pan to rest. zest of a lemon if you like a more lemony • Then reduce juices in the pan, add double taste). cream and then put the chicken back. • Season to taste with salt & pepper.

Serving Suggestion. Serve with any veg of choice and either new potatoes or rice.

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How to Write a Limerick Phil Jefferies

I was aged about 9 when I had my first encounter with a limerick. My big sister announced over the dinner table that her English homework was to write one. Having no previous experience, she asked for parental assistance. Our dad thought that “There was a young lady from Pontefract” would provide a suitable. Sadly, the rest is now lost in the mists of time but it is what sparked my interest. I’ll explain how to

write your own limericks so you can have some fun and impress your friends and family.

What is a Limerick and What Makes a Good One? It is a form of 5-line verse where lines 1, 2 and 5 rhyme with each other and lines 3 and 4 are shorter and rhyme with each other (if you’re musical, it’s 8 bars in six-eight time, with the shorter lines occupying bars 5 and 6 and the longer lines occupying 2 bars each). They are usually humorous, frequently rude (to a greater or letter extent) and tend to have a hint of anarchy or of breaking taboos. Word play and inner rhymes sometimes appear. The form was popularized by Edward Lear in his first Book of Nonsense (1846).

Wikipedia quotes the following limerick of unknown origin:

The lim’rick packs laughs anatomical Into space that is quite economical But the good ones I've seen So seldom are clean And the clean ones so seldom are comical

Some Examples in Composing Limericks Many limericks are about “a young lady from …”. Why should this be? Why not a young man? Well, “lady” has the right number of syllables to fit the metre whereas “man” doesn’t. Also, I suspect that most limericks are written by men and most men prefer writing about ladies. That said, my sister also has the limerick bug and hers are often about young ladies.

At a folk club one night, I heard the song “Rawtenstall Annual Fair” (Rawtenstall is a town in Lancashire, pronounced “Rotten-stall”). That reminded me of the “Pontefract” limerick and it struck me as another suitably challenging place name. In the end, it turned out not to be about a young lady:

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There was a daft bugger from Rawtenstall Who liked lamb and pork and beef not at all He ate no fowl nor fish Nor conventional dish Just insects and things on the ground that crawl

Hm. It’s a bit surreal, but the rhymes and the rhythm are right even if I do say so myself. Another rather odd one is by British wordplay and recreational mathematics expert Leigh Mercer:

(12 + 144 + 20 + 3√4) / 7 + (5 x 11) = 922 + 0 “That’s a limerick???” you may ask. It is read thus:

A dozen, a gross, and a score Plus three times the square root of four Divided by seven Plus five times eleven Is nine squared and not a bit more.

How Does One Go About Writing a Limerick? I like to start with something that interests me, or a situation that catches my imagination. I start with the first line, often involving a person from a particular place; then make a [mental] list of things that rhyme with that place (not forgetting things that don’t quite rhyme but the pronunciation can be “bent” slightly to get away with it). This often prompts some additional information about the person for line 2, if I’m really lucky it also prompts an amusing conclusion for line 5; then lines 3 and 4 need to work backwards from line 5 to set up the punchline.

At this stage, I’m not worrying about the rhythm, that can be fixed later. I’m trying to get the storyline and the rhymes to work. Once that’s done, it’s time for polishing. This uses the normal skill of the craft that goes into any poem, such as changing “tiny” to “miniscule” if an extra syllable is required, or changing “rapid” to “speedy” if it will set up an inner rhyme. Then the really important bit: sleep on it at least once, you’ll be amazed how hard your brain works when you let it off the leash and ideas for improvements often seem to pop up the following day or two.

What if there are no suitable rhymes for the place name? It’s only a convention that the place name goes at the end of line 1. I was trying to write a limerick for a mate who had returned to motorcycling in later life and was also having trouble with acid reflux. He happened to come from North Shields, which proved quite stubborn when searching for rhymes. Not a problem, the place wasn’t central to the plot, so it ended up:

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A biker from Tyneside, they say, Had terrible heartburn one day With a quick eructation And burning sensation In pain for his sins he did pay

Note the word order in the last line, which isn’t the order in which the words would appear in normal speech. Call it poetic license, it’s a useful trick to have up your sleeve and crops us fairly often in limericks and indeed in other poetry. As for “eructation”, I heard impressionist Alistair McGowan use the term when describing his technique for impersonating Gary Lineker and found it’s sound rather pleasing (though I had to look up what it meant).

In Conclusion If you follow the guidelines and apply a little imagination, it is possible for anyone to write a limerick. Give it a go and I’m sure Barry will publish them in the next issue of the Newsletter. (You may find a small sherry helps.)

Maritime Hartlepool Over Christmas and New Year -1

Photograph: Barry Liddle

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Another Good Bird Ken Williams

Most people I know are really pleased when in spring they hear a cuckoo calling, or see a swallow sweeping across the sky; for such chaps, having overwintered in Africa, are summer visitors, and give us hope that warm sunny days are very close.

Conversely there are other birds which are winter visitors. They breed in the far north; in Scandinavia, in Russia or even Arctic regions; but choose to spend their winters here in our more hospitable climes. Of these you may be familiar with fieldfares and redwings which turn up in parks and gardens around our town.

Many other species are to be found on the shore, or on mud or marshland in our area; e.g. the dainty little silver grey sanderlings, scurrying to and fro along the shore line on the beach. Several other species feed on the muddy edges of pools and creeks around Teesmouth. One of these is the bar tailed godwit – yes, that really is its name even though it does sound a bit like something invented by Spike Milligan or Peter Sellers in their ‘Goon Show’ days!

Much of what we know of all birds lifestyles and journeying comes from the bird ringing scheme, but recently some birds have had tiny micro-chips fitted, allowing them to be traced continuously, and this has resulted in some quite astonishing information.

Now, back to the aforementioned bar tailed godwit. This September one of these had a satellite tag fitted in Alaska and so its complete journey south was able to be traced. This bird flew the length of the North Pacific Ocean crossed the equator, and then down through the South Pacific to Auckland, New Zealand! This journey, a record 7,500 miles, it had completed non-stop – so without food – in eleven days! That’s just less than 700 miles a day; every day!!! Astounding! Even supposing it had a following wind, that would be barely credible, but it was recorded and proven. Absolutely outstanding! Another good bird! Maritime Hartlepool Over Christmas and New Year -2 Photograph: Barry Liddle

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A Song for New Year Roger Say

In praise of ale

(Can be sung to the tune of 'God bless you No worry about the shout of merry gentlemen') Time gentlemen please

You can sup up another You'll find it's a breeze There is one little caveat To keep your evening glowing Maintain your supply of beer Make sure the barrel's flowing Maintain your supply of beer Make sure the barrel's flowing

Now December is moving on And when you have supped up To your hearts content A new year drawing near There's no time like the present Close your eyes peacefully

For a glass or two of beer While basking in merriment

Supping beer in a pub Dream the dream of the just

Is surely the ideal Too tired to stay awake Tho' guzzling it at home Tomorrow gives another chance You can do with some real zeal Your thirst for you to slake Tho' guzzling it at home Tomorrow gives another chance You can do with some real zeal Your thirst for you to slake

There are times in life Now December is moving on

When life becomes a bore A new year drawing near So raise up your tankard There's no time like the present And slurp down some more For a glass or two of beer

You won't have to worry Supping beer in a pub About spilling your beer Is surely the ideal Of inadvertent rumblings Tho' guzzling it at home

You need have no fear You can do with some real zeal Of inadvertent rumblings Tho' guzzling it at home You need have no fear You can do with some real zeal

Maritime Hartlepool Over Christmas and New Year – 3 Photograph: Barry Liddle

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Poetry Corner

A Fresh Start A Scents of Occasion

A new year grows closer I’m sitting sewing curtains on the co-ops topmost floor. Old one soon to disappear When all at once assails my nose an odour pungent’ raw. A troubled year passing Now if I’ve made you wonder then please let me explain. Outlook becoming clear It’s that John Willy Cameron he’s roasting hops again.

Promise of a vaccine I’m just fourteen and on my way to school. Time to tone down the alarm Like lots of other boys and girls here in Hartlepool. At the bare minimum Something smells unpleasant We’ve smelled it oft before. It'll be a shot in the arm I still recall my mother shouting, “Joni shut that door.

High tide changes to low tide Oh no! they’re smoking kippers. They do it every day. Moon waxes and then wanes I’d pull that dreaded smoke house down if I could have my way. Bad times jostle with good times Moving while staying the same I’m with Margaret and Edith Glady’s and Norma Were in the outdoor pool now the weather is warmer Humans return to 'normality' The smell of the ozone the blue of the sky. The world continues to strive One mighty Shove and I’m flying high The first law of Nature Endure, overcome, survive. I quite fancied Lenny, but now he’s in trouble. Roger Say He can go and get lost for bursting my bubble.

Joan Hannon

Maritime Hartlepool Over Christmas and New Year – 4 Photograph: Barry Liddle

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Irene Green

17 July 1944 - 5 December 2020

Our dear friend Irene Green died on 5 December after a long illness bravely fought.

Irene was an active member of the U3A and made a good number of friends through her membership of several Interest Groups including: - Archaeology & History; Gardening; and Music Appreciation.

A service, conducted by Reverend Beverly Hollins, celebrating Irene’s life was held at Grange Road Methodist Church on 17 December. From the Eulogy we learned many things about a life well lived, including the fact that she married her beloved Martin on the day of England’s famous win in the World Cup Final of 1966.

Irene had not given much thought to the planning of her funeral, but she did select a couple of poems and two of her favourite hymn’s ‘How Great Thou Art’ and ‘Make Me A Channel of Your Peace’. There was also a fulsome tribute read by a family member.

Due to the Covid-19 restrictions, attendance at the service was by invitation only, otherwise the church would have been packed with her friends from the U3A, her friends from her career in teaching and her many friends from the regular congregation at Grange Road Methodist Church - which she attended for many years and to which she devoted much of her time in a wide variety of roles including that of Church Steward.

Irene was bright, kind, and funny and will be sadly missed by all who knew her.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to Martin, their two sons and the wider family.

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Always Look on the Bright Side of Life Barry Liddle

During these dark days of winter anyone can be excused for feeling a little downhearted. However, it is important not to dwell on old mishaps and bad events in your life, but remember the funny, nice, and happy times you have had. One way to do this, is to listen to music which raises the spirits and puts a smile on your face. My leading recommendations for up-beat popular songs (in no particular order) are:

1. Feeling Good — by Nina Simone. Who can forget the line, “It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life, and I'm feeling good.” 2. Climb Ev’ry Mountain – from the musical ‘Sound of Music’. One of my guilty pleasures. I was given a recording on the old 78rpm disc format when I was about 12 years old and I played it until it wore out. 3. Oh Happy Day is a 1967 gospel music arrangement of an 18th-century hymn by clergyman Philip Doddridge. Recorded by the Edwin Hawkins Singers, it became an international hit in 1969, It has since become a gospel music standard. 4. Tiptoe Through the Tulips by Tiny Tim. A smile registers on my face whenever I see a recording of Tiny Tim singing this song. To stand out from the crowd as a performer (which he achieved with great success), he sang in a ridiculously high falsetto voice whilst playing the ukulele and combined this with a unique look – involving strange clothes, long hair, and pasty white facial makeup (rather like the silent movie star Rudolph Valentino). Tiny Tim’s real name was Herbert Butros Khaury (and as Michael Caine once said – “not a lot of people know that”). 5. Walking on Sunshine – by Katrina And The Waves. This was by far their biggest ever hit in 1985 although a late revival in1997 saw them win the European Song Contest with the song "Love Shine a Light" 6. There's a Hole in My Bucket" is a children's song, and another of my guilty secrets. The song is based on a dialogue between two characters, called Henry and Liza, about a leaky bucket. It starts with - “There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza, There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, a hole. Then mend it, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry, Then mend it, dear Henry, dear Henry, mend it.” I defy anyone to sing that without a smile on their face. My favourite recording is by Pearl Carr and Teddy Johnson. 7. The Bee Song sung by Arthur Askey. Another of my guilty pleasures from my early days in short trousers. Arthur Askey's humour owed much to his playfulness, improvisations, and his use of catchphrases, which included "Hello playmates!", "I thank you" (pronounced "Ay-Thang-Yaw"), and "Before your very eyes". 8. Singin' in the Rain is the centrepiece of the 1952 musical film of the same name, in which Gene Kelly memorably danced to the song while splashing through puddles during a rainstorm. However, for maximum happiness I recommend Morecambe and Wise's version from their 1976 Christmas TV show – which has been voted the best film spoof of all time.

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9. The Hole in the Ground is a novelty song made popular by Bernard Cribbins in 1962 (another favourite from when I wore short trousers). it was a number nine hit in the UK Singles Chart and the memorable lyrics begin with - Don't dig there, dig it elsewhere. You're digging it round and it ought to be square. The shape of it's wrong, it's much too long, And you can't put a hole where a hole don't belong! 10. Lily the Pink – the comic song sung by The Scaffold is from my early years of wearing long trousers. The song sold over one million copies, and was awarded a gold disc. The Scaffold were a comedy, poetry and music trio from Liverpool and included Mike McGear (the brother of Paul McCartney). Their other songs I am happy to recommend include: Thank U Very Much"(which included the phrase "Aintree Iron” – which to this day baffles me) and "Liverpool Lou".

If you are on the internet, then I recommend you make a pot of tea, cut yourself a slice of cake and see how many of these songs you can find on YouTube. If you are not on the internet, see how many songs you can hum along to from memory. (All sources: Wikipedia).

Maritime Hartlepool Over Christmas and New Year – 5 Photograph: Barry Liddle

Hartlepool & District U3A. Registered Charity No 1153641. www.u3asites.org.uk/Hartlepool Page 15