MANHATTAN MURDER MYSTERY Screenplay by Woody Allen
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MANHATTAN MURDER MYSTERY Screenplay by Woody Allen & Marshall Brickman NOTE Most of the sequences in this production are filmed using a hand- held camera or a Steadycam. These very mobile cameras move around the set, and get constantly closer and further from the characters. Still, we'll be using the usual technical terms, such as «long shot» or «full shot» or «medium shot» here and there to give the reader an idea of the location of the camera at the beginning of each sequence. And then we'll mention the movements of the camera. TRISTAR LOGO Winged white horse flying over clouds BLACK SCREEN CREDITS IN WHITE LETTERS ON BLACK SCREEN We hear jazz music during the credits. END OF CREDITS NEW-YORK - AERIAL VIEW - EXTERIOR NIGHT While the camera is flying over New-York, we keep on hearing the jazz music. The camera reaches a round building that looks like a stadium and starts moving around the building. HOCKEY GAME - INTERIOR NIGHT Long shot on the skating rink. A hockey game is in progress on the rink. The camera follows a player, and then pans on the audience. The camera stops on a medium shot of Larry and Carol, a couple in their early fifties. Larry seems fascinated by the game, but Carol seems to find it boring. She looks at the ceiling, and then puts her hand over her mouth to suppress a yawn. Larry turns toward her. LARRY Come on. CAROL What? LARRY You promised to sit through the entire hockey game without being bored and I'll sit through the Wagner opera with you next week. CAROL I know, honey, I promised. I know. LARRY I already bought the earplugs. CAROL Yeah. Well, with your eyesight, I'm surprised you can see the puck. The crowd starts yelling and we guess that one of the players has done something really good. Carol mockingly claps her hands. CAROL Yay, hooray. Then she raises her eyes to the ceiling, seeming more bored than ever. LARRY'S BUILDING - LOBBY - INTERIOR NIGHT A nice-looking apartment building in New-York. Full shot of the lobby. We see the street through the glass door. An uniformed attendant is standing near a counter, on which he is writing on a book. Larry and Carol are coming from the street and entering the building. He is carrying some shopping bags, and she is reading a newspaper, the «Daily News». LARRY God. I can't wait to get into bed and stretch out. CAROL Yeah. The attendant slightly turns around and bows to them. They bow back to him. He goes back to his book-keeping, and the couple keeps on walking through the lobby. LARRY You know, there's a Bob Hope movie on television later. CAROL know. Can you believe this guy in Indiana ? Killed twelve victims, dismembered them and ate them. LARRY Really ? Well, it's an alternative lifestyle. CAROL Yeah, I'll say. They reach the two elevators. Larry presses the call-button on the wall between the two elevators. LARRY'S BUILDING - ELEVATOR - INTERIOR NIGHT Medium shot inside the cabin of the elevator. The inner door slides open. Carol enters first, still reading her newspaper. Larry enters behind her and presses a button on the control panel. PAUL (voice over) Hold the elevator. LILLIAN (voice over) I'm coming. Hearing people's voices, Larry puts his hand on the edge of the door to keep it from closing. PAUL (voice over) Hold the elevator. Paul and Lilian enter the elevator. They are a middle-aged couple. He is bald and tall, and very smily. She is small, with grey hair. LILLIAN That's right. PAUL Thank you. Lilian has a broad smile when she recognizes Larry and Carol. The elevator door slides shut. Lilian looks at Carol. LILLIAN I, uh, I see you at the gym sometimes. CAROL Oh, you do ? LILLIAN Yeah, we live in the apartment down the hall. CAROL Oh, well, I go whenever I have the discipline. LILLIAN It's important to put that time in. It does wonders. CAROL Oh god, yeah. I agree with you. LILLIAN Exercising changed my life. CAROL Well, geez... LARRY I prefer to atrophy. I'm not a very exercise person. PAUL We bought a treadmill last week. CAROL Oh, well, we had one. But you know, we got rid of it because it was just taking up too much space. LILLIAN Oh, it-it-it... LARRY Because you have to turn it on and get on it once in a while. That was her problem. LILLIAN Hey, I... exactly, I... and it's so confusing, with all those buttons and computerized programs. I'm just never gonna get that. LARRY'S LANDING - HALLWAY - INTERIOR NIGHT Full shot of a very sober and modern hallway. Creme-colored walls, grey carpeting, dark wooden doors. We hear the elevator door opening and Carol comes out, followed by Lilian, Larry and Paul. They all talk together and we can hardly understand the following dialogue. CAROL Oh, I know. It's late. LILLIAN It's so wonderful, meeting. CAROL Oh, well, yeah. PAUL It is just like New York. You have neighbors. You never meet them... You guys... The following line, said by Lilian, is clearer and we understand it better. LILLIAN ... I've seen you so many times in the hallway, you know... and I've always wanted to come up and say hallo. PAUL Well, anyway... good night. Larry and Carol walk away from Lilian and Paul, who remain near the elevator. CAROL (voice over) Good night. Such a lovely couple. You know that... Paul bends down to pick up something on the carpet. Lilian walks one step in Larry's direction. LILLIAN Oh, uh, say, hello ? Paul starts opening his apartment door, just across the hallway from the elevator. CAROL (voice over) Huh ? Yeah ? LILLIAN Huh, listen... why don't you come in for a-a-a second and have a drink with us ? I mean, we'd really love that. The camera pans around toward Larry and Carol. Larry makes a negative sign with his hand. CAROL Oh, oh well that'd be fine... PAUL (voice over) She makes great Irish coffee. Mute conversation between Carol and Larry. Larry evidently doesn't want to accept Lilian's invitation, but Carol wants to. LILLIAN (voice over) Oh, please ? Uh uh, I want you to give me a treadmill lesson. LARRY There's a movie on television I want to watch. Carol starts walking toward Lilian and Paul's apartment, followed reluctantly by Larry. The camera pans around during Carol's next line, and we see Carol entering Lilian an Paul's apartment. CAROL Oh, about the tread... oh, well, if I can figure it out, then believe me, anybody can. She laughs, and Larry, entering the apartment behind her, utters a forced laugh. PAUL'S APARTMENT - BEDROOM - INTERIOR NIGHT The cosy apartment of middle upper-class people. The decoration looks like them. Medium shot of Lilian walking across the bedroom toward the large double bed. She walks near the famous treadmill. LILLIAN Have a look at the instructions. They drive me crazy. You know ? I don't know what I'm doing at all. Let's look... CAROL (voice over) No. Please, it's easy. Lilian picks up a book on a table near the bed. LILLIAN Wonderful book they've given me. Now I'm at level five. CAROL (voice over) What ? LILLIAN That I know. CAROL (voice over) You're that advanced ? LILLIAN Well, yeah. CAROL (voice over) God, I only got to level two. Lilian brings the book to Carol. LILLIAN Look at these diagrams. Do you believe this ? CAROL That's amazing. She is standing near the treadmill. Lilian shows her one of the diagram in the book. LILLIAN I can't understand this even. CAROL Let me see. LILLIAN Yeah, well. See this ? CAROL Okay. PAUL'S APPARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - INTERIOR NIGHT One of the wall could be a bay window, but, for the moment, it is entirely covered by a beige drape. Medium shot of Paul bringing a stamp book to Larry. PAUL Now, let me show you a mint 1933 airmail. Very rare... and very beautiful. Larry is seated near a small table, on which Paul puts the book down. Paul sits down next to Larry. LARRY Yeah. Paul picks up a special philatelist magnifying glass and puts it in front of the stamp, for Larry to have a better look at it. PAUL Look at that. And this plate block is quite unique because it has a flaw in the engraving. See if you can see it. Larry, who is not interested in philately at all, scratches his head. LARRY Uh, it's hard for me. PAUL Actually I'll give you a little hint. Right down here in the corner. LARRY That tiny thing there ? PAUL Interesting, yeah. LARRY Ah, you have a really... PAUL That makes it quite valuable, you see. And I just got a commemorative set of issues that are going to be quite valuable, too. He picks up a transparent envelope inside which are several stamps. LARRY Yes. PAUL Look at the color, right there. All these are gonna become a real f... Larry stands up. LARRY Well, listen... we're probably keeping you up, right ? PAUL Oh, no-no-no. This is wonderful. LARRY I should be going. PAUL What do you do, if I may ask ? LARRY Me ? I'm in book publishing. I work up at Harper's.