Joco Virtual Cruise 2021: Print Schedule

JoCo Virtual Cruise 2021

O Ofﬁcial Event S Shadow Event P Sponsor Event

APRIL 10 • SATURDAY

12:00pm – O Welcome "Aboard" from the Management Main Stage 12:15pm Performers/Speakers: Jonathan Coulton, Storm DiCostanzo, Paul Sabourin, Drew Westphal Sure, it's not an actual, physical ship. We get that. Please just roll with the metaphor, okay?

1:00pm – 1:50pm S Do Right by your Shoulders and They'll do Right By You Half-Zoom Room Geek out about how the shoulder works so you can use this knowledge for good! Because when you understand why the shoulder is so commonly injured, you'll know how to avoid those common mistakes-- and feel a lot better. (Video and audio participation optional for Q&A; please DO move along with the movement exercises we do, but you don't have to have your camera on)

1:00pm – 1:50pm S JoCo Taskmaster StuyZoomsant Room Fans of UK's hit games show Taskmaster--this is YOUR chance to play the game--if interested in being a contestant please email [email protected] ASAP--or just log on to watch as the audience. We will see just how many tasks as we can squeeze into 50 minutes.

1:00pm – 1:50pm S Morning Walkies HudZoom Room Join me and my dog Aspen on a virtual morning walk. We will go out into the woods behind my house in the Canadian mountains, throw some sticks, and ID some plants.

2:00pm – 2:50pm S Introduction to The Chronicles of Huttle StuyZoomsant Room Select readings from Chris Westphal's series of comedic novels, followed by Q&A.

2:00pm – 2:50pm S Redshirts - Star Trek Musical Improv Half-Zoom Room Redshirts is the only all-women Star Trek-themed musical improv team in the known universe. Each of our shows is a Broadway-style musical comedy version of an imagined Star Trek episode, titled on the spot by audience suggestion.

We have been featured performers at ComicCon's SuperWeek, Star Trek Mission: New York at the Javits Center, the William S. Paley Center's 50th Anniversary Star Trek gala, the FDA's Women in STEM celebration, the New York Musical Improv Festival, FlameCon, and FemmeFest. We have provided the entertainment for New York's premier Star Trek fan club/cosplay society, NYC Away Team, at their annual holiday party each year since 2016. We are regulars at comedy venues around the city, including the Broadway Comedy Club, the People's Improv Theater, and the Magnet Theater.

2:00pm – 2:50pm S The Big One: The Meteorite that made the Chicxulub crater HudZoom Room A 30 minute presentation on the geology of the Yucatan Peninsula and the meteorite that wiped out the dinosaurs, with a 10 minute Q&A session afterwards.

3:00pm – 3:50pm S Angela Finally Does A Poetry Show HudZoom Room I will recite some poems that rhyme, some that don't, and maybe even sing a few things. Topics may include science, love, poop, and life.

3:00pm – 3:50pm S Hands-On Evolutionary Science in the Quandary Den StuyZoomsant Room The Quandary Den is a dungeon-crawler simulation driven by evolution. We'll explore how to develop & test evolutionary hypotheses and collaborate on group experiments. All ages welcome! 3:00pm – 3:50pm S Learn to Shim Sham Shimmy! Half-Zoom Room Join in to learn the Shim Sham Shimmy (the tap dancers' national anthem) with some history and classic jazz and soul tunes. Tap experience and shoes optional. We'll start slow and shimmy as we go!

4:00pm – 4:50pm S Diceborn Heroes: Learn and Play StuyZoomsant Room 1-4 player cooperative Fantasy boardgame on Tabletop Simulator.

4:00pm – 4:50pm S Everything You Wanted to Know About Guide and Service Dogs Half-Zoom Room Rachel is a guide dog handler and Marleigh has raised service dogs in training. Learn about the lives and adventures of guide and service dogs and get an update on Echo and Salem, the JoCoCruise's poodliest passengers! Adorable puppy pics guaranteed!

4:00pm – 4:50pm S Ships Of The Northern Fleet Live Q&A HudZoom Room We are the "Cast and Crew" of the "very real" show we all love Ships of The Northern Fleet. A series that both existed and you remember.

5:00pm – 5:50pm S Introduction to Improv on Zoom Half-Zoom Room Play improv games to ﬂex your listening and Yes...And...muscles. All experience levels welcome even if you are brand new to improv.

5:00pm – 5:50pm S Return of the Science Quiz Show HudZoom Room I will ask a series of questions in science-themed categories, mixing the serious with the silly. Participants must guess the answers, and keep their own scores.

5:00pm – 6:00pm P There's No Place Like Gnome: Polymer Clay Planter Gnomes The Holodeck Presenting Sponsors: Fiona's Fineries Fiona's Fineries and instructor Laura Parcel invite you to come learn the simple steps to making a small garden gnome to protect and decorate your indoor planters and pots. A simple gnome design can be customized with anything you want to add, be it clay or other bakeable materials (metal, wood, glass).

This class will require you to have an oven-bake polymer clay, but there are no additional required tools; you probably have stuff around the house, like toothpicks! Toothpicks make great tools! The ﬁrst half of the class will cover the basic gnome creation, and the remaining time will be open for questions and making accessories. Oven Baking tips will be shared in class to ensure successfully cured gnomes!

Recommended Supplies for this class: Clay: any oven-bake polymer clay. Sculpey and Fimo are quality brands, but even lower end clays work well for this project.

1/2oz white for the beard, 1/2oz skin tone color (head, nose, feet), 1oz color for body & hat (or 1/2 oz of two colors, if preferred)

Here's a possible sampler kit you could purchase: https://www.amazon.com/Sculpey-III-Multipack-Classic- Collection/dp/B000XAUKZM

Tools:

surface: any clean, flat/smooth surface (glass, ceramic, acrylic, waxed paper) flattening (hands/fingers, rolling pin) poking (toothpicks, chopsticks, needles) slicing (razor blade, steak knife, craft knife, scalpel)

The Basic Gnome in the attached image is what we'll be teaching. SUPPLIES NEEDED: See event description 6:00pm – 6:50pm S Binary Saga Audio Drama Read Through HudZoom Room Binary Saga is an Audio Drama about Two planets that communicate with a 2-year delay. Written by two teams that don't know what the other will send.

6:00pm – 6:50pm S Women At Warp: Shore Leave StuyZoomsant Room Join the hosts of the Women At Warp podcast as we discuss the planets and places where the characters of Trek relax and unwind. If we can't go on our vacation this year, let's live vicariously through theirs!

6:00pm – 8:00pm P Open Crafting The Holodeck Presenting Sponsors: Fiona's Fineries Are you making something? Would you like to hang out with other folks while they are also making something? Come and join us as we all make a little forward progress on that one (or more) projects we've been working on! Share some crafty knowledge, show your skills, ask for some crafty advice, chat with other crafters & makers, and enjoy a couple of hours of unstructured social crafting time.

7:00pm – 7:50pm S Ofﬁce Hours with Tim the Virologist Half-Zoom Room Group discussion of all things virus with an emphasis on the Covid Calamity

7:00pm – 7:50pm S WangWatican Meet-up HudZoom Room Come join us for some Wang Wang related fun! Bring your Wang Wang or another beverage of your choice, any beverage is a Wang Wang IF YOU BELIEVE!

Are you a canonized member? Don't really know what a Wang Wang is? Did you hear people shout it on boat? Maybe you're completely new and have no idea what I'm talking about? The WangWatican welcomes all! Come hang out!

Go in shadow, go in shade, have a Wang Wang. -The WangWatican Pope

8:00pm – 9:00pm O Opening Night Concert Main Stage Performers/Speakers: Jonathan Coulton, Storm DiCostanzo, Paul Sabourin, Drew Westphal

9:00pm – O We Got This With Mark & Hal (& Kelly Sue & Matt) Main Stage 10:00pm Performers/Speakers: We Got This with Mark and Hal, Mark Gagliardi, Hal Lublin, Kelly Sue DeConnick, Matt Fraction Mark and Hal are joined by Kelly Sue DeConnick and Matt Fraction on a very special episode of their (non)AWARD-WINNING podcast to settle, once and for all, the worst form of immortality.

10:00pm – P Heroes of Bacardia Playthrough The Holodeck 11:00pm Go to: https://www.twitch.tv/rollacrit

Join the Rollacrit team, a rowdy gang of former ThinkGeek ronin, in a live playthrough of their new and upcoming board game HEROES OF BARCADIA! Inspired by a past April Fool’s day gag, Heroes of Barcadia is a 2-6 player tile based dungeon crawl with a unique twist: your character’s health is determined by the amount of drink left in your glass. Quench your thirst for adventure with a taste of the game before its release!

10:00pm – O Dance Party with DJ Scalzi and DJ Riz Main Stage 12:00am Performers/Speakers: John Scalzi, Riz Rollins Come join the virtual dance ﬂoor with an hour of tunes spun by John Scalzi, followed immediately by an hour set from Riz Rollins!

This dance party will be held via Zoom; feel free to turn your camera on if you'd like to be visible to other participants. And please remember that the JoCo Cruise Code of Conduct applies to all events (re: content, nudity, harassment, etc.). 11:00pm – S dot.darkness Virtual Concert HudZoom Room 11:50pm dot.darkness (dot-dot-darkness) is a nerdy electronic rock duo formed by some comp sci students from Texas, whose musical influences include synthwave, prog rock, drum n bass, chiptune, and, of course, JoCo himself. Their latest album, Polymorph, draws from depictions of transformative experiences in works of science fiction and fantasy. O Official Event S Shadow Event P Sponsor Event

APRIL 11 • SUNDAY

12:30pm – S Open-Mic HudZoom Room 1:50pm Come perform a thing. Songs, poetry, comedy, and other weird things are all welcome. Live or pre-recorded. Up to 5 minutes per person.

Sign up to perform here: https://docs.google.com/forms /d/e/1FAIpQLSfFcxSbY09qGXZECV4Zvo2ESSCIrkPU_M73pHRA6VrWAOZ3jQ/viewform

1:00pm – 1:50pm S The Spice Must Flow Half-Zoom Room Mystiﬁed by spices? Not sure what's the difference between masala and curry powder? This overview and Q&A from my kitchen (and waaaay too many spices) will help you get a basic understanding of the possibilities and hopefully gain some conﬁdence in spicing up (har. har) your pandemic cooking at home. He/she/they who control the spice control the universe!

2:00pm – 2:50pm S Period Positivity: Cruise the crimson waves with comedy craftivism Half-Zoom Room Supply List can be found at: bit.ly/JOCOPERIOD Chella Quint does a whole song and dance about the history of menstrual taboos, literally and ﬁguratively. All genders of menstruators and non-menstruators are welcome to join in with activities to help you deconstruct menstrual taboos with wit, irony, and a litany of puns to help you put the YOU in UTERUS. This interactive workshop and cheerful crafting bee follows the inclusive ethos of the Period Positive Pledge framework. www.periodpositive.com

Further info about participation/materials: A downloadable pdf will be provided for printing out or tracing from the screen, with instructions on how to join in at home. Basic materials to have to hand: pen, pencil, black felt tip marker pen, a few sheets of plain paper, scissors, an empty toilet paper roll, one sheet of red A4 or letter sized paper (or white paper and a red crayon). Enhanced materials may include red felt, card or fabric, and a safety pin or masking tape, but the workshop can be thoroughly enjoyed without the enhanced materials. Extremely enhanced materials may include a 3D printer or laser cutter, but these are highly, highly, highly unnecessary to all but the most makerspace-keen. SUPPLIES NEEDED: https://bit.ly/JOCOPERIOD

2:00pm – 2:50pm S Sweetbriar’s Caring for Wildlife HudZoom Room Learn about what we do at the non-proﬁt center to take care of wildlife here in NY. ECSS Sweetbriar Nature Center cares for injured, sick, and orphaned wild animals in our area. We also teach natural science and environmental programs to people of all ages. In this presentation, participants will meet some of our resident non-releasable ambassador animals including Stitch the Hawk and Tulip the Opossum. We’ll give you some tips on how to help your local wildlife, what to do if you ﬁnd an animal that needs help, and share with you some stories of what goes on at the center. 2:30pm – 4:30pm P Tabletop Simulator Board Game Meetup The Holodeck Presenting Sponsors: World 9 Gaming Calling all board gamers! Let's meet up and play some games on Tabletop Simulator. Host World 9 Gaming has dozens to choose from and is happy to teach new players. If there are lots of players we can split into separate channels.

Participants must own the Tabletop Simulator app, which can be purchased on Steam. SUPPLIES NEEDED: Participants must own the Tabletop Simulator app, which can be purchased on Steam.

3:00pm – 3:50pm S Costuming & Cosplay Happy Hour StuyZoomsant Room Costuming & Cosplayers come socialize & say "hi" during this virtual mingle session. Feel free to show off a costume (or not), we know everything is a little harder during the pandemic.

3:00pm – 3:50pm S JoCo Cruise Library Peeps Meetup HudZoom Room Whether you have worked or volunteered in a library; currently do so; or dream of doing so; let's come together from all over and meet each other while we are on the same boat (virtual) to network and learn about each other's experiences (such as about how different libraries are providing services during COVID-19), sharing stories, and giving encouragement to ﬁnd a job or volunteer in a library or to graduate with their master's in library science degree.

3:00pm – 3:50pm S JoCo Fantasy Baseball Meetup Half-Zoom Room Following in the footsteps of the successful Joco Fantasy Football leagues, I'm looking to try and start up a Joco fantasy baseball league

4:00pm – 4:50pm S Crochet Tiaras! HudZoom Room Join "the lady who leaves crochet tiaras outside her door" for a lesson in how to crochet your own! You, yes, YOU can learn how to make your very own cool looking tiara from yarn, in 50 minutes! This is a class for all levels-- no prior crochet knowledge is required. (Heck, you could probably do it even if you've had a couple too many wang wangs ;)). You will need to gather a few things to be able to do this from home, but we will announce it ahead of time. :) SUPPLIES NEEDED: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1QI2ZZUd-IIlDlhXhRfrQf2wiPrlG7d5-72LR9Zpmoyk/

4:00pm – 4:50pm S Deserving of Ceremony - You and Your Meaningful Holidays and Celebrations Half-Zoom Room Move from the holidays and celebrations of your youth to ones that are meaningful now, for who you are and what you emotionally need. Take what works, leave the rest, and bring ceremony for the people and things you love most.

5:00pm – 5:50pm S Sea Shanty Singalong HudZoom Room Sing along with Sea Chanteys, or even lead one! If we can't be in a boat at sea, we can still sing about it! Sign up to lead a Chantey here: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/19Y1QMQOtiFO2DXUM6-UvAzafsPAMlQ-66HV0xEhIW-Q/edit#gid=0

5:00pm – 5:50pm S Welcome To... Board Game Half-Zoom Room This 'Flip and Write' game is about designing the best city streets in a new town. Add parks, backyard pools, fences and more to score the most points. Beginners are welcome. Help me and my wife plan our streets or you can print out a sheet and play with us. No maximum number of players.

6:00pm – 7:50pm S Making Creatures for the Classic Star Wars Trilogy. HudZoom Room Veteran Star Wars creature builder, "that Yoda Guy" Nick Maley, tells inside stories about building creatures for the Mos Eisley Cantina, building Yoda, and putting Harrison Ford into Carbonite. 6:00pm – 8:00pm P Nerdy Trivia The Holodeck Ryn and Kevin Grant—Cardboard Concierges and owners of The Castle: A Board Game Cafe—have been running trivia for 5 years and are bringing it online to JoCo Cruise! Join the quizmasters as they test the knowledge of all things nerdy in 6 rounds of fun, friends and trivia. We cover topics like history, technology, pop nerdery, and the 90's (which DEFINITELY ISN'T history, that would make us old). Things you won't see here are: Sports questions, politics questions and questions about Japanese city based mascots (they're real, they're adorable and they confuse us). We've got picture rounds, we've got music rounds, we've got questions about things that are round, and we've got prizes, so sign up in a team of no more than 6 people and test your knowledge against other JoCo friends!

Participants just need friends, knowledge of nerdy stuff and a way to access triviabolt.com during the event. (There will also be some "open groups" available for people to join if they don't have a team of their own.) If you have a group of friends you'd like to be on a team together, email us your team name and we'll get your group situated ahead of time! Email us at [email protected].

Add this event to your "My Sched" and have a valid email address in your Sched proﬁle to receive additional information and instructions regarding participating in this event. SUPPLIES NEEDED: Access to triviabolt.com during the event

8:00pm – 9:00pm O Concert - Vance Gilbert Main Stage Performers/Speakers: Vance Gilbert

9:00pm – O Celebrity Jackboxing Main Stage 10:15pm Performers/Speakers: Open Mike Eagle, Molly Lewis, Laser Malena-Webber, Paul Sabourin, Symphony Sanders, Wil Wheaton JoCo Cruise "celebrities" cut loose and play some Jackbox Games, much to the inevitable delight of everyone watching.

10:30pm – P Jackbox Game Night The Holodeck 12:30am Presenting Sponsors: World 9 Gaming Join the World 9 Gaming crew for some Jackbox shenanigans. We'll rotate between games as requested. Slots are ﬁrst come but we'll ask people to take turns. Spectators welcome and encouraged!

11:00pm – S An Open chat (and dram?) on Whiskies and Spirits with Bino Half-Zoom Room 11:50pm Chatting and maybe even dramming about various whiskies and spirits with Bino Gopal from Los Angeles, a huge evangelist of the two-and who's also a member of a multitude of such clubs and groups and has been doing virtual tastings since getting of JCC11!

11:00pm – S Cosplay 101: Introduction to Cosplay for the Coscurious HudZoom Room 11:50pm This talk will aim the six questions--who, what, where, when, why, and how--as they pertain to new cosplayers who have considered trying it but have been hesitant for some reason. The main focus of the panel combines the "why" and "how" to help guide a new cosplayer to something they would enjoy.

APRIL 12 • MONDAY

12:00pm – O Daily Check-in with Coach Cruise and Pals Main Stage 12:15pm Performers/Speakers: Storm DiCostanzo Morning announcements? Inspirational messages? Calisthenics? Whatever content Storm and the Management decide to come up with while in our Virtual Cruise COVID bubble? Probably/maybe to all of these things! 8:00pm – 9:00pm O Carbon Wrangling for Fun & Proﬁt: A Conversation with Julio Friedmann Main Stage Performers/Speakers: Dr. Julio Friedmann, Jonathan Coulton, Eli Mitchell-Larson, Drew Westphal Dr. Julio Friedmann, Senior Research Scholar at the Center on Global Energy Policy at Columbia University and Chief Scientist for Carbon Direct, sits down (notionally speaking) for a talk about carbon policy with Eli Mitchell- Larson (who was instrumental in the development of JoCo Cruise's Carbon Roadmap) and JoCo Cruise's own Jonathan and Drew.

9:00pm – O Concert - Mega Ran, The Doubleclicks, Gangstagrass Main Stage 10:00pm Performers/Speakers: Mega Ran, The Doubleclicks, Gangstagrass

11:00pm – S We played every Infocom text adventure! HudZoom Room 11:50pm Over the course of four years, Kay and Carrington played through the entire library of classic Infocom interactive ﬁction games. We'll talk about that experience, and about the past and present of interactive ﬁction games.

APRIL 13 • TUESDAY

7:30pm – 7:45pm O Fancy Pants Parade Main Stage

8:00pm – 9:00pm O Quarantine Creativity: How We Got Through 2020 and What We Learned From It Main Stage Performers/Speakers: Charlie Jane Anders, Mary Robinette Kowal, Rebecca Roanhorse, John Scalzi This last year has been one unlike any other in living memory: a pandemic, an economic collapse and a presidential election year—and its aftermath. And yet creative lives had to go on in between all of this. On this panel, we'll look back at the year that was, how we met the challenge—or didn't!—and what, if anything, we can take out of the last year to incorporate into our creative and professional lives in 2021 and beyond.

9:00pm – O Comedy Night with Myq Kaplan, Jackie Kashian, Joyelle Nicole Johnson Main Stage 10:00pm Performers/Speakers: Joyelle Nicole Johnson, Myq Kaplan, Jackie Kashian Comedians appreciate having an actual, laughing audience to see and react to. Add this event to your "My Sched" for the chance to get chosen to participate in the actual Zoom session for this comedy show! (You won't be visible on the actual live stream, only to the comics.)

10:00pm – O Management Q&A - AFTER DARK! Main Stage 11:00pm Performers/Speakers: Jonathan Coulton, Storm DiCostanzo, Paul Sabourin, Drew Westphal It's more or less the usual Management Q&A that happens on JoCo Cruise, except this time at night! One or several adult beverages may be present.

APRIL 14 • WEDNESDAY

8:00pm – 9:00pm O Closing Concert w/Jonathan Coulton and Friends Main Stage Performers/Speakers: Jonathan Coulton, Jim Boggia, Storm DiCostanzo, The Doubleclicks, Ted Leo, Molly Lewis, Tawny Newsome and Bethany Thomas, Paul Sabourin Join us for the bittersweet closing concert featuring a bevy of special guests and perhaps a few surprises! 9:30pm – S Promptly Challenged: Writing Songs Inspired by a Challenge Prompt HudZoom Room 10:20pm Panel discussion of Singer/Songwriters talking shop on creating music for internet competitions inspired by a Challenge or Prompt. SpinTunes #17 will be the test case.