Unit 3 Relationship – Family and Peer Group
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UNIT 3 RELATIONSHIP – FAMILY AND PEER GROUP Structure 3.0 Introduction 3.1 Objectives 3.2 Adolescence Relations 3.3 Adolescence Relations with Family 3.3.1 Parenting Styles 3.3.2 Impact of Parenting Styles 3.3.3 Attachment Perspective 3.3.3.1 Parent Child Attachment in Adolescence 3.3.4 Parent Child Communication 3.4 Adolescence Relations with Peers 3.5 Peers vs. Parents 3.6 Let Us Sum Up 3.7 Unit End Questions 3.8 Suggested Readings 3.0 INTRODUCTION Adolescence is a transitional stage of physical and mental development that occurs between childhood and adulthood. It is usually accompanied by an increased independence allowed by the parents or legal guardians and less supervision. Adolescents are known as being gangly, awkward, and troublesome youngsters. This period of life is seen as a time of “storm and stress”. Teenagers during this period has general increase in peer focus and involvement in peer related social sports and other extracurricular activities. The importance of social acceptance during adolescence and friendship networks during this period often are organised into relatively rigid cliques that differ in social status within school and community setting. A positive and healthy relationship between parent and their adolescent children considered has important influence ion the development of self esteem and an overall personality growth/development of the teenager. Adolescent youngsters who are able to talk to their parents about issues that are important to them and get in turn emotional support from the parents are less likely to rely on peers for advice on important issues. Peer relationships and friendships become more important as children grow into early adolescence. Peer acceptance represents social status or popularity within a large group, whereas friendships represent relationships based on mutual respect, appreciation, and liking. Early adolescence is a time characterised by friendships that share more common feelings and are more supportive than when children are younger. In this unit, we will discuss the varying relations of adolescence with their parents, families, and peers. 3 1 Development During Adolescence 3.1 OBJECTIVES After going through this unit, you will be able to: explain the relationships of adolescent youngsters with different persons in their environment; analyse the relationship of a teenager with their families and how parenting styles contribute to a healthy parent child relationship; and explain the relationship of an adolescent youngsters with their peers and friends. 3.2 ADOLESCENCE RELATIONS Adolescence as discussed in units above is a transitional stage of physical and mental human development that occurs between childhood and adulthood. Adolescence is usually accompanied by an increased independence allowed by the parents or legal guardians with relatively lesser supervision. Adolescent youngster is termed as being a gangly, awkward, and troublesome individual. This period of life is also seen as a time of “storm and stress”. It is a time of great change on many levels. Probably most dramatic are the biological changes associated with puberty. These changes include dramatic shifts in the shape of the body, increase in hormones, and changes in brain architecture. These biological shifts are directly linked to changes in sexual interest, cognitive capacities and physical capacities. There are various major social changes associated with the school-linked transitions and with changes in the roles adolescents are expected to play with all those around them, the period becomes highly stressful and full of conflicts, at times extremely joyous and at times rather low in moods. Finally there are major psychological changes linked to increasing social and cognitive maturity. Very few developmental periods are characterised by so many changes at so many different levels. With rapid transformation in all areas, comes a heightened potential for both positive and negative outcomes. Adolescence is also a time when individuals make many choices and engage in a wide range of behaviours which are indicators of the roles that they will play for the rest of their lives. For example, adolescents have to decide about the typical courses or stream that they have to opt for in the high school, they have to decide about which after school activities they must participate in and which peer group to join and so on. They begin to make future educational and occupational plans with the help of their teachers and parents as well as with their peers and try to implement these plans through secondary school course work and out of school vocational and volunteer activities. All these decisions are to be preferably taken by the youngster and it shouldalso be his decision finally. However though parents and other elders may facilitate the decision making progress, if they unnecessarily interfere or impose their ideas on the youngster it may have disastrous consequences. A change if brought about which is attributed to the younbgster’s own efforts and decision making, may lead to a positive self confidence of the adolescent youngster. Adolescence brings with it many challenges. The teenager is now required to accept a mature personal role, be able to think logically, develop an appropriate gender role and establish good relations with a wide range of other people with whom he/she will 3 2 interact in society. It is a time during which teenagers learn to think for themselves, develop the right values and make decisions. They may display at times open Relationship – Family rebellion and animosity which is part of their growing up into an independent individual and Peer Group who wants to emancipate self from dependence on parents. Teenagers during this period have general increase in peer focus and involvement in peer related social sports and other extracurricular activities. The importance they attach to of these activities they do with the peers is far higher than they attach to the academic activities and the activities the indulge in with family members. The importance of social acceptance during adolescence and friendship networks during this period are organised into relatively rigid cliques that differ in social status within the school and community setting. The existence of these cliques reflects the need of the adolescents to establish a sense of identity, a sense of belongingness to the group are some of the ways the youngsters solve the problem of “who I am”. Peers influence adolescence on things such as dress and clothing styles, music and activity choices. 3.3 ADOLESCENCE RELATION WITH FAMILY Parents and their adolescence relate and interact, on a number of different levels such as playmates, teacher and student, healer and patient, and disciplinarian and offender. Interaction between parents and their children are characterised by warmth, consistently shown to have positive outcomes. As adolescent youngster becomes physically mature they often seek more independence and autonomy and may begin to question family rules and regulations, norms and standards. These in turn lead to conflicts between the youngster and the adult family members. Generally the issues are concerned with dress and appearance, chores and dating. Despite these conflicting issues, parents and adolescents agree more regarding core values linked to education, politics and spirituality. As children grow up the parent-child relationship modifies so as to account for changing physical, socio emotional and cognitive needs of both the child and the parent. An interactional style Even though the nature of the parent-child relationship changes with time and development, there are several static but key essentials such as attachment and communication, to a healthy and protective relationship from childhood through adolescence. A relation between a parent and their adolescence is very crucial and also decides upon the self esteem and an overall personality growth/development of the teenager. For example, children who report having a positive relationship with their parents tend to have higher self esteem, have more positive peer relationships, do better in school and avoid behaviours such as substance use and delinquency. Adolescents who are able to talk to their parents about issues that are important to them and get emotional support as and when needed are less likely to rely on peers for advice on important issues. They are less likely to succumb to peer pressure which at times may take the form of being pressurized into using alcohol and drugs as means of coping with the pressure experienced by the adolescent person. Hence, adolescents who have and can maintain an open, positive, honest, flexible and emotionally supportive relationship with their parents can withstand pressure from undesirable sources. On the other hand, adolescents who have problematic relationships and poor communication with their parents, tend to become more dependent on their peers for advice and also for emotional support. Such behaviours 3 3 Development During may lead to many undesirable outcomes such as poor performance in school, poor Adolescence relationship, indulging in alcohol and other drugs, as well as manifesting undesirable aggressive behaviours, such as going against the school system and school authorities and parents. 3.3.1 Parenting Styles Parenting is a complex activity that includes many specific behaviours that work individually and together to influence development of children in the desired direction. Although specific parenting