Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology Rose-Hulman Scholar

The Rose Thorn Archive Student Newspaper

Fall 10-28-1988

Volume 24 - Issue 9 - Friday, October 28, 1988

Rose Thorn Staff Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology, [email protected]

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Recommended Citation Rose Thorn Staff, "Volume 24 - Issue 9 - Friday, October 28, 1988" (1988). The Rose Thorn Archive. 742. https://scholar.rose-hulman.edu/rosethorn/742

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This Book is brought to you for free and open access by the Student Newspaper at Rose-Hulman Scholar. It has been accepted for inclusion in The Rose Thorn Archive by an authorized administrator of Rose-Hulman Scholar. For more information, please contact [email protected]. FRIDAY, OCT. 28, 1988 Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology Vol. 24, No. 9

IFC Second GOOD LUCK ROSE CROSS COUNTRY Formals at CAC Fri. & Sun. Championships!

-.1••••••1, News Briefs Rose Drama Club to perform 'An Enemy of the People' by Steve Reid still finds some revelations of The Rose Drama Club pro- life today. duction, "An Enemy of the People," by Heinrik Ibsen, op- The revival of the past will ens tonight at 8:00 p.m. in the be continued through the win- Moench Hall auditorium. ter term with a possible Winter Other performances will be Review. This review will be held on Saturday and again on attempting to bring back the November 4th and 5th, at the Alumni of the Rose Drama same time. Tickets will be on Club for a dinner of fun and ex- sale at the door for $3.50. cerpts from the productions of This year is the Rose Drama the past 25 years. The next Club's 25th Anniversary "Sil- item on their "Silver Jubilee" ver Jubilee." Their "Silver Ju- schedule will be a trip to Lon- bilee" season opens with the don over the Spring Break. The performance of "An Enemy of season will be concluded with the People." This play was the the musical "South Pacific." Drama Club's first production Everyone is welcome to join 25 years ago. This timeless the club and participate in the drama, written 140 years ago, upcoming events. GM Sunraycer to visit Rose Campus The world's fastest solar powered car, the GM Sunraycer, will be at Rose on Wednesday, Nov. 2 from 9 a.m. until 5 p.m. at the Shook Memorial Fieldhouse. This engineering marvel won the 1,950-mile World Solar Challenge in Australia in November, 1987, and led the Pasadena Tournament of Roses Parade on Jan. 1, 1988, as "Pace Car of the Future." The car SMWC presents seminar is on a national tour this year. On hand to talk about the Sunraycer will be GM Sunraycer on Soviet policy team spokespersons Richard and Sandra McKenney. The Sunraycer is pictured above. Molly K. Brennan, Chevrolet assistant product engineering manager, and one of the six Sunraycer Is there an "open voice" relations. The lecture will be drivers in the Australian race, is shown in the insert. policy, a new freedom of ex- followed by a question and an- pression, in the Soviet Union? swer period. What impact glasnost does The second session is a Engineering enrollment continues have on foreign and domestic luncheon, and panel discussion to drop affairs, Soviet on the people on the topic "Religious Free- on by Jeff Valput and the Church. dom in the Soviet Union" from engineering enrollment in 1988 exceptions. Particularly sharp These questions The total number of full-time and sharper will be an- noon to 2 p.m. in the LeFer even drops as we decreases ocurred in the areas of swered undergraduate engineering stu- move during "Glasnost, Ballroom. A panel of religious into the 1990s. mining and petroleum engineer- dents dropped by 3.4 percent in During same Myth or Reality," a seminar leaders and theologians from this time period, ing. As engineering enrollments the Fall of 1987, compared to the on Soviet policy sponsored by the Terre Haute area graduate enrollments have been in general decreased, the number will par- previous year. The decline the office of continuing educa- ticipate. in re- steadily increasing. During the of second- and third- year stu- tion at Saint-Mary-of-the corded freshman enrollments next decade, 40-50 percent of un- dents without declared majors in- Woods College on Tuesday, The final session, set from 3 was slightly larger, 3.8 percent. dergraduate engineering stu- creased. November 15. to 4:15 p.m. in the Hayes Au- dents are expected to continue Special guest Jack Smith ditorium of the Science Build- Enrollments in undergraduate their education and seek graduate On the whole, the share of un- will discuss glasnost and its ing, examines "The Promises engineering programs in the U.S. degrees. The trend will mean that dergraduate engineering enroll- effects in three sessions. Smith and Perils of SDI." Registra- have been dropping since they it will be more common to enter ments held by women remained is vice-president of the Stanley tion deadline for the seminar is reached all-time high levels in the workplace with a master's de- stable in 1987, despite fears that Foundation, an organization Friday, Nov. 4. Morning and 1983. Explanations for the decline gree instead of a bachelor's. declines in their interest in the which encourages citizen in- afternoon sessions are com- involve two independent factors, Most undergraduate engineer- profession might be especially se- volvement in United States for- plimentary, but there will be a the size of the pool of potential col- ing disciplines followed the down- vere. It seems likely that women eign policy decision making. $7.50 luncheon charge for the lege students, and levels of inter- ward trend, although there were a will continue to account for about The first session scheduled the "Religious Freedom in the est in engineering as a career. If few exceptions. Aerospace, one out of every seven un- from 9:30 to 11 a.m. in the Soviet Union" discussion. interest continues to decline, we architectural, marine, and gener- dergraduate engineering stu- Hayes Auditiorium of the Sci- For more information, con- should observe further drops in al engineering were among these dents in the near future. ence Building, focuses on re- tact the Saint Mary-of-the cent foreign policy changes Woods College office of con- and the future of U.S./Soviet tinuing education at 535-5148. Poll finds youth choose colleges like whiskey

(CPS)—In what some call the schools continue to attract so Fifty-four percent of high "Chivas Regal Syndrome," a lot many applicants even as cheaper, school juniors and seniors sur- of young people apparently academically comparable cam- veyed, however, expected to Colleges short on computer, believe that the more they pay puses can't attract enough. graduate from college anyway. for college, the better the college Few schools would admit to The poll was commissioned by math, business professors must be. raising their prices solely to lure the Council for Advancement and In a survey trying to find out snobs. In 1982, George Washing- Support of Education and con- (CPS) — There aren't National Center for Education how students choose which col- ton University did adopt a consul- ducted Aug. 24 through Sept. 7 by enough professors around to Information claimed long- lege to attend — it also was to tant's advice to raise its prices in the Gallup Organization. It was teach all the computer science, standing predictions that the mark National Higher Education order to draw applications from based on telephone interviews of business and math courses stu- nation's colleges would have Week,Oct. 9-15 — 38 percent of the people who ordinarily would go persons aged 13-21. dents nationwide want to take, as many as 100,000 vacant students polled agreed that "the only to more expensive schools, Only 20 percent said a campus's the American Council on teaching positions by 1990 were higher the tuition costs of a col- but provoked a spate of bad pub- social life or athletic reputation Education said Oct. 12 not coming true, released a lege, the better the quality of licity in the process. were "extremely important" to "Faculty shortages are study showing that 1,000 1988 education a student will receive." The Education Week Survey them. serious and likely to continue," education grads were still College officials call the belief was not without inconsistencies. Seventy percent also said public said Elaine El-Khawas of the looking for jobs. the "Chivas Regal Syndrome" Asked why more young people schools offer as good an education Washington, D.C.-based ACE, "There is no teaching short- after the premium Scotch whisky, didn't go to college, 48 percent of as private schools, and 60 percent a trade group that represents age," the NCEI's Emily and have used it to explain why the students said it was because felt two-year institutions are on a college presidents from Feistritzer concluded. Ivy League and other expensive college was too expensive. par with four-year schools. around the country. A huge chorus of other "Colleges are facing a real observers — including El- crunch because the shortages Khawas, who had yet to re- Making the grade without are most severe in the areas lease her own survey of the pressure and pain where student interest is situation — vehemently dis- — Overcoming the 'I Can'ts' strong," she added. agreed. by the next and the next. Each In a survey, the ACE found ACE's focus on colleges, Robert J. Kriegel, Ph.D. tasteful. time he successfully makes a turn that 60 percent of the nation's anyway, suggested almost ev- Have you ever felt that you The "can'ts" (I can't do all he can look to the next and colleges say they can't find any ery campus in the nation is un- can't possibly read four chapters, that...) overwhelm us so that we the next. Each time he successfully qualified people to fill teaching able to hire enough professors study for that philosophy test, do nothing but procrastinate. makes a turn he gains a sense of accom- vacancies in their computer in one field or another. Some 55 write that paper, If you are like most college stu- make dinner and plishment and builds confidence science departments. percent of the colleges also call your girlfriend dents today, you feel increasingly all in one in himself- and his skiing ability. Forty-four percent of the expect new faculty shortages night? Then instead overwhelmed. of doing all The solution for the "cant's" schools said they can't find to develop in foreign lang- the things you know you A skier with the "can'ts" looks should,do sounds pretty simple, and it is. business professors to hire. uage, physical science and you just turn on down a steep, icy slope and is pa- the stereo and Big projects are made up of Two-year colleges reported vocational-technical depart- avoid them ralyzed. "I can't ski lots of all? Yes? You're this," he small, doable steps. having acute math professor ments — which don't have va- among the thinks. majority. "Can do" thinking and the posi- shortages, El-Khawas said. cancies now — within the next The trick Procrastination occurs when for the skier is to find a tive actions that follow increase In late September, the five years. you "can think you have too much to do do" -- a first turn he can your confidence and composure or when you imagine something is make. Once he successfully com- and maximize your effectiveness. going to be too difficult or dis- pletes the first turn he can look to Pretty soon you're on a roll. FRIDAY, PAGE 2 ROSE THORN OCT. 28, 1988

Opinion and Columns Letter to the Editor To the Editor: when tic returned to the office. Member. Class of 1992 Kurt and I talked and he under- My name is Matt Warstler and stood my predicament. He told I am an ex-candidate for the me that if I had any right to a freshman class office of re-election, one would take treasurer. I would like to discuss place. the election process here at As we were taking, Matt Rose-Hulman or rather the arrived back at the Student non-election process. You see I Government office. He agreed to wished to run for treasurer of the explain to me the result of his class of 1992. discussion with Dean Lucas. He During high school I was not said, and I quote, "I checked the involved in many clubs because I mailbox at 11:00 on Wednesday was very heavily involved in morning and your petition was • athletics, although I was presi- not in it." Obviously Matt, I had dent of the National Honor just turned it in. The he said he Society. Here at Rose I'm still checked the mailbox again at involved in athletics — I'm on 11:00 on Thursday morning and the football team — but I wanted my petition was there. He told to be active in more. As I arrived me simply, "We had our on campus, I thought that a class deadlines." I inquired as to what office would be an ample start. that meant and he said,"We just I obtained a petition from the had our deadlines. The deadline switchboard as all prospective was at 4:30 on Wednesday to do. candidates were supposed afternoon and we did not receive signa- I acquired the twenty-five yours until Thursday." tures of fellow classmates and turned my petition in before the I. was always lead to believe 4 : 30 p.m. deadline on that people in office, with Wednesday, October 19. In fact, I authority, were to be turned my petition in at 11:00 responsible. As president, Mr. Just for the Record: No Place for Disgrace' a.m. Wednesday morning, to box White should have checked the through the campus mail as mailbox at the deadline to see if 172, by Vince Klortho Flotsam and Jetsam still show a Flotsam and Jetsam has now pro- I was instructed to do by the any other petitions had been Flotsam and Jetsam premiered great deal of instinct for what gressed to the much more mun- campus operator. turned in. He did not. I believe two years ago with Doomsday for gives power metal its mystique. dane topics of hatred, fear, and Friday, election day, came and Matt White was negligent in his the Deceiver. On that album, the The tempo change that makes the unmourned death, approaching I, full of expectation, went to duties. Then he tried to cover up band formed in Phoenix by Jason bridge of the title track is well ex- them with the sort of macabre vote. I received a ballot and a mistake on his part by telling Newsted displayed a popular ecuted, not gimmicky. Other tem- fascination that Edgar Allen Poe, looked to see who was running me that I missed the deadline. style of heavy metal greatly in- po changes and mood shifts give a Stephen King, and Iron Maiden for the different offices. I was From my brief experience fluenced by Metallica. The album song-within-a-song quality to are famous for. Although it lacks to not see my name with with Matt White, I get the shocked contained music that had mas- their music. The band's vocalist the immediate shock value the the list of candidates for class impression that he holds the title tered the extremes: short, long, not only chants the lyrics but band likes to generate, this ap- I was very upset to of SGA president but does not treasurer. and standard length songs; slow actually sings as well. The real proach leaves a longer lasting and the least. wish to perform the duties that say tempos and speed metal fast trick to power metal is not to be harder felt impression. No song back to my room and go along with the office. If those I came ones; acoustic guitar solos and able to sound heavy enough, but to demonstrates this intensity better until I found out are the types of actions and called around thunderous power chords. But, as know when to back off and de- than the anti-P.M.R.C. "Hard on I was supposed to talk about decisions made by Matt White, who the band established itself as one emphasize a couple of bars so that You," a song with eloquence that problem. I reached Dean then maybe he is not qualified to my of the strongest debuts of the year, the hard parts remain intense. makes Megadeth's "Hook in and explained my sit- handle the position, and should Lucas the carpet came out from under it. Flotsam and Jetsam capture this Mouth" look lame. went to be replaced by someone who uation. He graciously Newsted, the member who wrote quality vividly, even going so far Proving that the party-hardy out what had taken place wishes to live up to the responsi- find much of the band's music and all as to put silent beats in "Dreams teenager inside these guys is still he would get back bilities of an SGA president. and said that of their lyrics, accepted an offer of Death." alive and well, the band has re- I believe Matt White did not with me. he could not refuse. He replaced made "Saturday Night's Alright the day, as I returned want to shoulder the responsibil- Later in the late Cliff Burton as bass for Fighting," originally perform- a note ity of holding a re-election for the .. to my room I discovered guitarist in Metallica. "their new album. ed by Elton John. Just what the me to call class treasurer. A on my door instructing office of Although I was still excited with is quite different from world needs, yet another heavy of SGA, at is the only fair way of Matt White, president re-election the album, I predicted death for metal cover tune, right? Wrong. 446. I returned his call the winner. I am not a their first, it firmly extension declaring Flotsam and Jetsam. Sur- After hearing this version, you'll I am a sore to find out what had transpired. sore loser. prisingly, however, Electra reestablishes them have a hard time believing that vice-preisdent I had absolutely Kurt Lengacher, non-participant. signed them last year. Although the song wasn't written by a metal and kindly winning in an within the metal com- - of SGA, answered no chance of their new album, No Place for band in the first place. was not explained that at the moment, election where my name Disgrace, is quite different from munity." Considering the strength of this White Dean Lucas and Matt even placed on the ballot. their first, it firmly reestablishes album and the current mood were in conference discussing Sincerely, them within the metal commun- In some ways, the band has swing toward heavy metal, No the solution to the problem and Matt Warstler ity. backed down lyrically. This Place for Disgrace should attract me of 1992 that he would have Matt call Member, Class While they are currently cy- album contains nothing like their a great deal of favorable atten- cling through a couple of bass trademark "Hammerhead," a tion. While Megadeth and An- guitarists looking for the right song which could put Tipper Gore thrax are battling it out to see guy, the rest of Flotsam and Jet- in her grave. They've also side- who's the number two power met- sam's lineup is unchanged. The stepped the cliched topic of nu- al band, they had better keep an THORN STAFF music itself has changed, how- clear war, covered adequately eye on Flotsam and Jetsam. This ever. Gone is the Metallica-clone by "Doomsday for the Deceiver" band just might overtake them The Rose Thorn is published weekly at Rose-Hulman sound of the first album. Gone and countless other metal bands. both. Institute of Technology, Box 170, 5500 Wabash Ave., also are the very, very short and songs. Tempo changes Terre Haute, IN 47803. Phone 812 877-1511 ext. 255. very long are rarer and acoustic parts are Editor Steve Ufheil downplayed. This album is much more polished, lacking the raw News Editor P.J. Hinton feeling of the first album. The band sounds like a group of pro- ANA Sports Editor Clark Pentico fessionals rather than a bunch of certainly a Humor Editor Ron Dippold guys jammin'. This is different album, but by no means BUCKL UP FOR LIFE! Photo Editor Chris Sloffer is it not as good. INDIANA GOVERNOR'S HIGHWAY SAFETY PROGRAM Advertising Steve Ufheil Business Manager Scott Kirkpatrick LXA P.J. Hinton, Reporters Fraternity Rho FIJI Triangle Jeff Valput, Keith Miller, Ray Urbanic Difs? Columnist Bobby Woolf, Ron Dippold Sportswriters Dan Braker, TRUMP 5MA5H Cary Gerber, Ray Urbanic For the sixth straight year, THE • THEIR the men of Delta Sigma Phi Photographers Tim Mulzer, won the Blue Key ACES " FACES Matt McDonough, Joe Forler, Matt Morris, Tim Marling Homecoming banner competition. This year's Layout The Editors banner featured a moveable Adviser David Piker Rosie that slid down a pole and smashed an Evansville Ace. The contest is held or comments from The Rose Thorn welcomes letters during the homecoming are also readers. Articles, ideas, and announcements pep rally and is judged by desired. In view of length constraints, we reserve the selected members of the right to limit the lengths of comments and use excerpts Rose community. from letters. All submitted material must be signed. All material should be submitted at least one week prior to publication. FRIDAY, OCT. 28, 1988 ROSE THORN PAGE 3 Sports Engineers' comeback against Centre sets pace for Sewanee

by Ray Uibanic coming back from a disappointing ing in the second half," com-• It took until halfway through the first half and playing at the high mented Duncan. "He was a man third quarter, but the Rose- level they have set for themselves possessed on pass protection and Hulman football team finally this season."We just wouldn't let he ran the ball especially hard, started playing like a CAC Cham- our guys quit," commented Coach which helped out the passing pionship team, overcoming Scott Duncan. "There comes a game. Generally I don't single out previously-undefeated Centre time in a game when you have to one guy after a game, but Tony College 20-12 last Saturday. The perform." had a special day." win was Rose's first College Ath- The Engineers followed The Sewanee Tigers, Rose's letic Conference victory of the through with a 19-yard touchdown second CAC opponent to be played season, making their record 1-0 in in a row, are struggling right now the conference and 5-2 overall. just to get into the win column, The Engineers face the Sewanee Coach Duncan, "He taking a four-game losing streak Tigers this Saturday at 1:30 p.m. back home after an unsuccessful in Sewanee, Tennessee. was a man possessed roadtrip. However, Sewanee Despite the Engineers' defense on pass protection Coach Bill Samko still believes recovering three fumbles and and he ran the ball es- that Sewanee is a year away from stealing an interception within the contending for the CAC title. Two first thirty minutes of the game, pecially hard..." young quarterbacks, sophomore the offense experienced a prob- John Shoop and freshman Scott lem in the first half that has been Thompson, alternate leading the anything but a problem for them pass from Duff to tight end Luke offense. Sophomore running back this season: they couldn't score. Dickerson late in the third quarter Mark Berineau, averaging 77 The main reason for the lack of on a drive consisting of two fourth- rushing yards per game, and points was due to the intense pres- and-six situations, one being the senior wide receiver Will sure Centre had on the defensive scoring toss. Fullback Neal Rum- Meadows, among CAC leaders in line, sacking Rose senior quar- sey added two more touchdowns punt and kickoff returns, also add terback Jason Duff a total of in the fourth quarter, putting Rose to the Tigers' arsenal. seven times for 60 yards in the ahead for good. Statistically speaking, this Sat- game and holding the Engineer Another important star of the urday's game could be very running backs to little yardage. game was senior tailback Tony special for Jason Duff, who could Meanwhile, the Colonels man- Broadnax, who not only rushed not only help the Engineers to aged two touchdowns and a 12-0 for 93 yards on 24 carries, but also their third win in a row, but also lead going into halftime. added good blocking and strong break several personal-best sea- However, the second half intensity to a somewhat quiet son records in pass completions marked new life in the Engineers, offensive squad. "Tony got us go- (13 away), pass attempts (44 away), and touchdown passes (3 away). In addition, Duff needs only 177 yards to reach the 2,000- yard mark for a season (23 to file photo break his own record). Jason Duff gears up to break his own records. Rose soccer prepares for season end By Cary Gerber indicate it, but we played two day, here at 3:00. The final match On October 22, Rose's soccer pretty good matches against two is on Saturday at University of In- team experienced another defeat. talented teams. Wabash had too dianapolis at 1:00. We all wish The victor of this match was much individual talent for us. U. them good luck on the final match- Wabash, coming out the game es this year. with five points to Rose's one. Rose's point was made by Chris Coach Raurk, "The Zadlo, his second goal of his ca- scores won't indicate f reer. He was assisted by Shawn Perkins. Wabash is ranked it, but we played pretty $7.00 twelfth in the Great Lakes good matches against Shampoo, Cut & Style Region soccer poll. PROFESSIONAL STAFF The following Sunday the team two talented teams." Tues.-Fri. 10-7, Sat. 9-5 departed to play a match against 10 MINUTES University of the South. Again, of the South wore us out in the FROM CAMPUS Air' another defeat was wrought upon second half. We kept them at bay photo by Matt McDonough Rose, whose team scored zero for two-thirds of the match but Pete Wentzel, 22, performs some fancy footwork. points against U. of the South's had to play too much defense in two. University of the South clin- the final 45 minutes. MMWMGCEMER ches at least a tie for the CAC Rose soccer has two remaining 1233 Wabash Averwelliii championship, with a 3-0-1 record. matches for this soccer season. Rose's record stands thus: CAC: 1 The first of the two is against 234-4760 - 3, Overall: 4 - 10. Greenville College on Wednes- -- Expires 10-30-88 — — J When Coach Ruark was asked about his impressions on the 111111/11 games,he said,"The scores won't MINIM 11-111v1i1r1 I— YOU QUALIFY FOR PUT YOUR INSTANT CREDIT! Start making credit pur- COLLEGE DEGREE chases IMMEDIATELY! We will send you a Members Credit Card at once with TO WORK. NO CREDIT CHECK. Buy an Jewelry, Clothing ,Sport- Air Force Officer Training School Go ahead. Live it up while you can. Eat anything and everything you want, ing Goods ,Watches, Elec- from those processed meats to fatty dairy products to that extra tronics & MORE! All with is an excellent start to a measure of salt But do it soon. Because poor eating habits can lead to installment payments out challenging career as an Air high blood cholesterol, which can result in dogged arteries, a damaged of our "Giant 100+ Pages heart, and an early death. The American Heart Association urges you to Catalog." Take 12 months Force Officer. We offer great eat sensibly. Avoid food high in tat, salt and cholesterol. Avoid eating to repay. Your personal starting pay, medical care, 30 too much. It could keep you from an early grave and let you live it ups credit card is a -second days of vacation with little longer. I.D.- valuable for check pay each cashing, etc. plus your year and management oAmerican Heart Association Students Credit Group opportunities. Contact an WE'RE FIGHTING FOR YOUR LIFE A-1 reference will be on file to help you obtain Air Force recruiter. Find out what COUPON! • OPEN TIL 9 other credit cards. So Officer Training School can mean BAPTIST STUDENT send in your $5 catalog Style Cut deposit now. (refundable for you. Call Layer & Feathered FELLOWSHIP with your first order) Eatable' your crodA Today, Thursday, Nov. 3 $5.50 100% MAJ SUTTON SatIstaclion Guaranteed r&_nokjeaesi REG. $6.50 (or your Money Back) 6:00 p.m. I I 317-848-5942 COLLECT Expires 11-11-88 Kum United Ministries Center His N Hers %Adroit sty 321 North 7th Hairstyling World sum

1440 S. 25th 232-0631 = Joi-n us for good food MINIM Int INI Minutes from Campus MEMBERS P.O. BOX ACIS NI UMW We match all tan ads — bring them in Ilk 11.1111 U'1111111111111. and warm fellowship. Students FORT LAUDERDALE. Al) session MIN mak. Tans $1.75 per GPCXn. flORIDA 33338.1 1111•111.1111, Now Jim, hirAlirdir4rAdrAir...0r4O.r L' FRIDAY, OCT. 28, 1988 PAGE 4 ROSE THORN

Humor/Satire Dad's Day BLOOM COUNTY by Berke Breathed Yes, it's almost that time of as collateral for a loan from Paul year again! You can smell winter Masonry. Grab a Dad's Day but- in the air (or is it the pulp mill?), ton (don't worry, it won't show up the trees are turning pretty colors till next quarter's bill) and head and leaves are being massacred out for lunch. in the thousands (but it looks good). In short, we're approach- 11:00 A.M. - "Sample the typical ing that Ivy League look. It's time Saturday lunch at Rosem- to invite dear old Dad down for Hosem..." Pay some money. Try Dad's Day, and hit him up for any to explain to parents that steak, cash we might have missed, while shrimp, and Eggs Benedict are we're at it. Remember last year's not normal lunch items, and that Dad's Day? Fade back with me to the only time you normally get crisp, green lettuce is when it's Saturday, last year (Freshmen 504,67711,Vo'5 IN -176 will just have to imagine the been lying around too long. Atf' 5O4e7HING5„. SOME77IING bliss)... Noon- Show up at the football field COMING, HoRRIFMG. to get a good seat. In a fit of ANO UNSREAMotY NEAR.. 6:00 A.M. - Stumble into bed, still playfulness, Dad runs under the weaving around after last night's bleachers. He gets mugged. You party. Try to remember if you still clean him up, trying to explain have any friends. Think,"To hell that those people were from the with it," and collapse into a well- business office. Watch the football earned slumber. game.Buy an elephant hat that no 7:00 A.M. - "Up and at'em, Son!" sane person would ever wear. The dulcet tones of dear old Dad's 4:00 P.M. - "Quality Time." En- voice breaks through the room. gage in "man-to-man' talk with He has come early to share some Dad, and watch in horror as he extra quality time. Wake up, insists on talking to your teachers, notice someone in bed with you especially that "nice Dr. Farsibl- 6002 6000 talk about your AVAPOI4C10715.!. WINS -THANKS (how could you have missed ing." Have a little V ONE something that big?), spend next attitude problems. FACTOR / hour convincing Dad that you 5:30 P.M. - At $7.00 a head you can don't even know who she is, let get a decent, high-quality meal. alone what she was doing there. Instead, we're eating at ARAT. Hangover sets in. We're off to a They went all out for lunch,so why great start. should they bust their buns 8:00 A.M. - Meet Mom, who has tonight? Nail Mark Farmer with a been waiting in the car. Wonder roll. aloud why she came along for 8: 00 P.M. - Out for the "full expe- Dad's Day. You, of course, know rience',we go to see the play.Pay that she's not going to let him out more money. Good play, but Dad of her sight for a whole day. gets stuck in those damn little Cross the strip joint off your chairs you take your exams in. PIRE COOKING 5MZ, 4Ti5TE7? 'Activities' list. Call it a day. C,AMPAI6N CHAIIMAN 8:30 A.M. - Read our neat "Dad's Day Brochure". Exclaim in awe Now wasn't that fun? Just WERE UR) at all the things we can do for only remember, you can still cancel FORTY "a nominal charge." Put Mom up this year's reservations! POINTS

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TOP 10 Things //- &OLP/MN:5 ,8106RAPH)'PRNTEP NCI_ 175 A VEGISEXIIAL. 77C 8114 45 A NTR11E5 & JAYME5 Ela OUT Of ar/TROI, 5171,77N6 1 Like About the Torn A SHOW,* NEw PICTURE Oc legal/SIVE RAM/PA INN YE,9R5 .toVKIE-: Z037 arellENP 6(77NbrASIER5fir CANPIOATE ,61“. erti A CAMIGE. bARFIEZI, MO Pax reLoR ArITE 8677Y/i270 CENTER, 1. Only comes once a week! 2. You can never see enough pictures of Dr. Hulburp. me. I just read Bloom 3. Don't ask ; County.

4. Who else could make the soccer I/O MORE CRISES, - I WINER_ HEAR, BILI-'5 ENGAECO team look good? ANY moR6 CRA565 mew &IvENS• HER /wpm.HIT THE MOTHER'S MOv7,V&IN NOON . 5. What happened to Vince Klortho? CalA16.(/ Al 6. Impress my girlfriend with those "blue-collar hands" from the ink they use. 7. Haven't I seen that photo somewhere before? 8. A paper that's less than 50", adver- tising strains my eyes. 9. No Valley Viewpoint. If I want a moron's opinion, I'll visit Purdue. 10. Someday they'll find someone who reads the sports page.