April 28, 2017 CATHOLIC The Catholic Commentator 1B Your Catholic

Special Supplement of The Catholic Commentator Photo by Kleinpeter Photography April 28, 2017 2B The Catholic Commentator CATHOLIC WEDDINGS April 28, 2017 When planning a wedding, couple must adhere to diocesan policies A couple choosing to marry in the the celebration have a clear understanding about what they should realize that their wedding is more than a public dis- are being asked to do and that they are people of faith. play; it is a sacrament. Because the ceremony is a public act of worship A well-planned liturgy gives insight into the importance as well, it should reflect the communal nature of the sacra- the couple has placed on their wedding. But there are some ment, with the guests serving not merely as spectators, but diocesan policies that pertain to weddings. more as participants in the marriage celebration. They are In the Diocese of Baton Rouge, weddings are not per- called upon to pray, to sing and to witness the love of Christ mitted on Sunday or on holy days of obligation. Nor are in the church and in society, to be signs of Christian love weddings, even without the nuptial Mass, permitted after and support for the couple as they begin their married life. 3 p.m. on Saturday or days preceding the holy days of ob- The couple is encouraged to choose the readings, pre- ligation. pare the general intercessions and select the music for the Weddings on other weekdays must be scheduled to be- wedding liturgy. gin no later than 8 p.m. Weddings may not be celebrated out-of-doors, in com- The Diocese of Baton Rouge recommends that music be There is no diocesan norm prohibiting marriage during mercial halls, secular facilities or private homes. chosen that is technically correct and of good quality. That Advent or Lent. But, where weddings are scheduled during In the Catholic Church, a marriage of two Catholics nor- which is cheap or a trite musical cliché should not even be these times of the church year, the couple should be advised mally takes place within a Mass. For a serious reason, a considered. to take into consideration the special nature of these litur- marriage between a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic The music at weddings should serve to emphasize the gical seasons. In practice, the décor and liturgical arrange- may take place at a nuptial Mass. Permission may also be sacred event, not distract from it. Music at a particular ments determined by the parish during these seasons take granted for a Catholic and a non-baptized person to be mar- wedding must be judged on how well it will enable this par- priority over the environment desired by the couple for the ried at a nuptial Mass for a grave reason. ticular group of people present at this wedding to express wedding. When either the or groom is not Catholic, the cou- their faith. Some churches require adherence to parochial In the Diocese of Baton Rouge, weddings are usually to ple is encouraged to choose a wedding liturgy that does not guidelines for wedding music in hope that the suggestions be celebrated in the parish church where either the bride include Communion. contained there will offer even more help in planning the or groom has a domicile, quasi-domicile or month-long The wedding liturgy is complete whether or not there is celebration of the wedding. residence. With the permission of the pastor of either the a Mass. There are several books available that contain readings bride or groom and the pastor of the place of the proposed The bride and groom are the ones receiving the sacra- from sacred Scripture that would be appropriate in plan- wedding, a wedding may take place in some other parish ment and they are also the primary ministers of the cele- ning for a wedding. These books also contain relevant com- church. With the additional permission of the proper re- bration. There are also many other ministers at the wed- mentaries on the readings to assist the couple in choosing ligious superior, a wedding may take place in a chapel at- ding, each having a special role in the service. Care should the readings and the Gospel that would be appropriate for tached to a religious house. be given that those persons asked to be ministers during their wedding. April 28, 2017 CATHOLIC WEDDINGS The Catholic Commentator 3B Wedding photographers can tell stories of the day By Nancy Wiechec Kansas City, Missouri, business spe- Catholic News Service cializing in wedding and family photo- journalism. PHOENIX – Many photojournal- “We tell stories with images,” he ists who have lost their jobs because said. “Weddings are wonderful because of shrinking news staffs are turning to there’s a whole story going on, and if I as an alternative stop the action to pose photos then I’m career. That makes good sense for pho- not capturing the whole story.” tographers and for wedding clients. He said his photographers will gen- Editorial photography is about doc- erally pose some traditional couple and umenting moments and emotion and group shots, but their focus is on can- making sure you’re where the key ac- did, natural moments. tion is. That’s exactly what couples want Hesse offers these tips for contract- to have captured on their most celebrat- ing a photojournalist for a wedding: ed day, said Doug Hesse, who left the – Make certain that photojournal- “There are beautiful moments at weddings that don’t need to be set up and they world of news photography nearly 25 ism is the style of photos that you want. are real and wonderful,” said Doug Hesse, founder and owner of Kdog Photogra- years ago. In most cases photojournalists will rely phers, a Kansas City, Mo., business specializing in wedding and family photojour- “There are beautiful moments that on natural light, giving images greater nalism. CNS photo by Robin Utrecht, EPA don’t need to be set up and they are real depth and dimension. Another popular and wonderful,” said Hesse, founder style would be portrait photography, or set up by the photographer. Portrait flash to give a well-illuminated scene. and owner of Kdog Photographers, a in which many of the photos are posed photographers usually use strobe or SEE PHOTOGRAPHERS PAGE 7B New order of celebrating marriage has minor changes

By Richard Meek reflect the sacrament that is be- couple with myriad of options Additionally, during the ex- importance of music during a The Catholic Commentator tween a man and a woman and for the opening procession. Fa- change of rings the wording has wedding ceremony and said the the sacrament bond ss perma- ther Ranzino said the procession been slightly changed to “receive hymns selected should reflect Long-standing wedding tra- nent and God takes the initiative must take place in the “custom- this ring” to emphasize that each the Scriptures and the sacra- ditions have been retained in the to invite the couple into the mat- ary manner” which for liturgy is one is freely giving themselves to mental nature of marriage and new Order of Celebrating Mat- rimonial union. to enter with a cross. He recom- the other. “not music of the popular cul- rimony, which was released by “So while that is significant mends the procession to include Father Ranzino reiterated the SEE CHANGES PAGE 8B the U.S. Conference of Catholic in clarification, it also continues the groomsmen if they are going Bishops, according to Father Tom with the church’s belief that mar- to be up front with the priest, as Ranzino, vicar general for the Di- riage is a sacrament and Christ is well as the altar servers and read- ocese of Baton Rouge. a partner with a man and a wom- ers. B->alazzo mernardo Father Ranzino said the an into this kind of marital bond.” However, Father Ranzino said Over 35 years experience. B->alazzoOver 35 years mernardo experience. changes were “not dramatic” and He explained the new rite clar- the procession can be arranged Over 35 years experience. that the wedding ceremony is the ifies some of the language from as the couple wishes. B->alazzo mernardo 35 “church’s celebration of (a cou- the first edition, initially in both “What we are trying to do is Over years experience. ple’s) marriage. Latin and English in 1968 follow- show some equality between the “The church is just trying to ing the Second Vatican Council. husband and the and that uphold the dignity of both the He said there was also a desire to they are co-partners,” Father husband and wife.” find a way to allow the assembly Ranzino said. “Our long standing The changes were mandatory to engage in such a way to give tradition has been to highlight beginning Dec. 30. a witness to what is happening the bride as if she is the only min- Father Ranzino said the new and to do so at appropriate times ister and that is not what we are Order of Celebrating Matrimony to express their support for the doing. "[AfikeCWJiere sets guidelines, some optional, bridge and groom. “It’s not what we are. We are "[AfikeCWJiere "[AfikeCWJiere for the ceremony, including the One of the changes occurs not celebrating the bride only.” Qfour (/)reams C¼n l¼me grue" Qfour (/)reams C¼n l¼me grue" "[AfikeCWJiere opening procession, music, re- early in the ceremony with the Father Ranzino encourages Qfour (/)reams C¼n l¼me grue" ceiving of the rings and the read- rite calling for a hymn to be sung the bride and groom to walk in Qfour (/)reams y C¼n l¼me grue" ings to be used. after the entrance procession and with their parents, saying “it’s a We cater any event - g p y He said it’s important to note everyone is in place. The second lovely way for both the bride and Wedding RecepWetions, cater Rehearsal an event Dinners, - Anniversaries, g q p that the bishops are calling the occurs after the bride and groom groom to express how much their WeddinBanRecequets,Wetions, Lunc cater heons,Rehearsal an yReunions, event Dinners, - Parties Anniversaries,... wedding ceremony the Order of have given their consent and the mom and dad mean to them. WeddinBang Recequets,ptions, Lunc heons,Rehearsal Reunions, Dinners, Parties Anniversaries,... Bridal Rendezvous Matrimony, saying the word or- priest invites the congregation to He said a second processional DecideBan qonuets, a date Lunc forheons, your Reunions,special occasion Parties... and Decide onJanuary a date 14, for 2018 your •special 1 to 4 p.m.occasion and der means a “collection of rites.” pray or sing either a an acclama- option is for the priest and servers Decidelet our staffon ahelp date make for your it a special premier occasion experience. and “There are three rites within tion suggested within the rite or a to process to the altar and wait for let our staffhelp make it a premier experience. the order plus the order of bless- different acclamation. the bride and groom to enter. Decidelet our staffon ahelp date make for your it a special premier occasion experience. and ing an engaged couple, the or- Another change of note where Father Ranzino said the new let our staffhelp make it a premier experience. 2244 Highway 3120 der of blessing a married couple the community can respond is rite mandates that at least one 2244 Highway 3120 Donaldsonville, LA3 70346 within Mass on the anniversary the singing of a hymn or praise of the readings must explicitly Donaldsonville,2244 Highway LA 70120346 Ph. 225-473-8716 FAX225-473 3-8740 of a marriage,” Father Ranzino following the blessing and giving speak of marriage, not just love. Ph. 225-47Donaldsonville,22443-8 716Hig hwayFAX225-47 LA 3 7012046 3 -8740 Visit ourPh website. 225-47 at:3-8 www.bernardoscaterin716 FAX225-473-8740g .com said. “The thing to notice about of rings. And the word consent is now be- Visit our websiteDonaldsonville, at: www.bernardoscaterin LA 70346 g.com matrimony is using the word to The new rite presents the ing used and not vows. Visit ourPh website. 225-47 at:3-8 www.bernardoscaterin716 FAX225-473-8740g .com Visit our website at: www.bernardoscatering.com 4B The Catholic Commentator CATHOLIC WEDDINGS April 28, 2017 Wedding day details don’t compare to lifetime preparation By Mike Nelson include: Catholic News Service – Engaged Encounter week- ends to focus on relationships. In an address to engaged – Single-day or multiple couples, Pope Francis said evening classes that address many couples are more con- practical issues. cerned with the “exterior de- – Ongoing mentor connec- tails” of their wedding plan- tions with married couples that ning such as the banquet, can share real-life experiences. photographs, clothes and flow- Each of these preparation ers. Those, he said, are “im- tools emphasizes marriage as portant for a celebration, but a sacrament in the Catholic only if they point to the real Church, something quite dif- reason for your joy: the Lord’s ferent from what engaged cou- blessing on your love.” ples might glean from watch- Weddings are big deals, no ing reality TV shows or reading doubt about it. But as the pope glamour magazines. points out, it is easy for couples “There is so much awful to lose sight of the bigger pic- promotion on some of these ture – the marriage – if their TV shows where they make focus is on a single day’s cele- the bride out to be the star of bration. an event, rather than a partner That’s where church-spon- in a marriage,” said Mary Fay, sored programs come in, to associate director of marriage provide perspective. and family life ministry in the “Our main challenge, as a Diocese of Albany, New York. church, is addressing a lack of “That’s why faith-based prepa- understanding in what mar- ration is so important; it is a In an address to engaged couples, Pope Francis said many couples are more concerned with the “exterior riage is,” said Mimi Streett, moment of evangelization for details” of their wedding planning such as the banquet, photographs, clothes and . Adobe Stock by Kzenon director of family life ministry these couples.” for the Diocese of Oakland, In the Albany Diocese, resolution skills, finance man- better prepared to further ex- The tone of the retreat is California. about 500 couples a year go agement, career and family plore their relationship,” said “serious yet joyful, with caring That is why marriage min- through the diocesan program balance, couple’s prayer, and Jared Zimmerer, director of and respect,” she said. “Sure, istry leaders at the diocesan that includes daylong sessions the benefits of being part of a adult catechesis and evangeli- some couples are there to get and parish level emphasize which address sacraments, Christian community. zation at St. Francis of Assisi it checked off, like a homework All Your Wedding Occasions the need for solid, faith-based spirituality, family of origin, “A significant number are Church in Grapevine, Texas. assignment, but we also see preparation process that can communication and conflict unchurched or inactive in the “The preparation process al- some beautiful things happen. From the news of your to the celebration of the "I do's" faith,” added Fay. “So they need lows couples the chance to find A lot of couples tell us their more serious preparation.” out where they may have dif- communication is better, they Catered in our NEWLY remodeled banquet facility A married couple is pres- ferent ideas – perhaps on how take this commitment more ent at each session to talk to raise children, or handle seriously, many take steps to about and answer questions finances – so they can better convert or return to church.” or your special place! on marriage. “By seeing a pos- understand and address those Still, even the best, most itive example, it gives faith-centered prepa- the engaged couples a Weddings are big deals, no ration may not dras- sense of marriage as a tically impact a cou- All Your Wedding Occasions shared life, and that’s ple’s concerns over Themed dinner buffets-great for bachelor and bachelorette parties doubt about it. But as the From the news of your engagement something they don’t which flowers should get from the media’s pope points out, it is easy for decorate the church, Romantic candlelight rehearsal dinners to the celebration of the "I do's" depictions of mar- or what colors the Catered in our Newly remodeled banquet facility riage,” said Fay. “And couples to lose sight of the bigger bridal party should Bridal brunches and lunches by the end of session, wear, or what they or your special place! they are more attuned picture – the marriage – if should serve at their Themed buffet dinners – great for bachelor to marriage as sacra- reception or, whether Couples Cocktail Party Showers ment. They see that their focus is on a to incorporate “some- and bachelorette parties they’re not just creat- thing cool they saw Romantic candlelight rehearsal dinners ing a one-time event.” single day’s celebration. on TV or Pinterest” Bridal brunches and lunches In the Diocese into their wedding Contact Susanne for all your catering needs of Fort Worth, Tex- liturgy. Couple's cocktail party showers as, a mandatory three-stage issues,” Zimmerer added. “It depends on how seri- preparation process includes a As often as possible, priests ously couples take their faith,” 7521 Jefferson Hwy- Baton Rouge, La Contact Courtney or Brian for all your catering needs course in natural family plan- or women religious are part of Zimmerer said, adding that in ning, a retreat and an on-going the presenting teams, “and it his experience couples who “go 225-924-9841 7521 Jefferson Hwy. ~ Baton Rouge, La. connection with a sponsor cou- can make a huge difference,” through the preparation start 225-924-9841 ple. said Streett. “At our weekend to attend Mass and confession The process is a means to retreats, we offer engaged cou- more regularly, and start to ac- View our catering menu at:www.cafeamericainrest.com View our catering menu at: “lay out what the church be- ples the sacrament of reconcil- cept that marriage is what the cafeamericainrest.com lieves about the sacramental iation, and many take advan- church wants” not what they Find us on Facebook nature of marriage, and we tage. And when they write to want. Find us on Facebook help people discern what they us afterward and tell us they’ve “That is a grace of the Holy believe and why, so they can be stopped cohabiting, that’s big.” Spirit,” he added. April 28, 2017 CATHOLIC WEDDINGS The Catholic Commentator 5B Reading list for engaged couples should include ‘Amoris Laetitia’

By Carol Zimmermann and also should reflect on the complete union that elevates Catholic News Service Bible passages selected for and perfects the social dimen- their wedding liturgy and the sion of existence, gives sexu- WASHINGTON – “Amoris meaning of their exchanged ality its deepest meaning, and Laetitia,” Pope Francis’ 2016 rings. benefits children by offering apostolic exhortation on mar- On a practical level, he cau- them the best context for their riage and family life, is not tioned against the “exhausted growth and development,” he only something that can bene- and harried” feeling many cou- wrote. fit parish programs but it also ples experience on their wed- He also said those involved offers very basic and practical ding day and suggested they in marriage preparation should advice for engaged couples. could avoid this through more try not to overwhelm couples “Learning to love someone modest or simple ceremonies. with too much information and does not happen automati- “Have the courage to be dif- instead focus on helping them cally, nor can it be taught in a ferent. Don’t let yourselves get accept church teaching and ob- workshop just prior to the cel- swallowed up by a society of tain resources on practical ad- ebration of marriage,” the pope consumption and empty ap- vice and programs. wrote in his reflections on the pearances. What is important The pope recommended October 2015 Synod on the is the love you share, strength- that marriage preparation pro- In “Amoris Laetitia,” Pope Francis’ 2016 apostolic exhortation on mar- Family. ened and sanctified by grace,” grams help couples recognize riage and family life, the pope said marriage is not the “end of the He also said the main ob- he said, sounding almost like eventual problems and risks road,” but ‘a life-long calling based on a firm and realistic decision to jective of parish marriage the father of the bride. they could face. face all trials and difficult moments together.” CNS photo by Nancy Wiechec preparation should be to help Pope Francis also pointed “In this way,” he said, cou- engaged couples “help each to out in “Amoris Laetitia” that ples can come to realize the kind of life they hope to build years of their marriage. learn how to love this very real there are many reasons young wisdom of breaking off a re- together. “Young love needs to keep person with whom he or she people don’t get married – fi- lationship whose failure and Marriage is not the “end of dancing towards the future plans to share his or her whole nancial reasons, fears or the painful aftermath can be fore- the road,” he said, but “a life- with immense hope,” he wrote. life.” sense that marriage would lim- seen.” long calling based on a firm Because that hope, he add- He suggested that couples it their independence. The pope also pointed out and realistic decision to face ed, is the leaven that “in those learn this first from their par- To counter these views, he that “many couples marry all trials and difficult moments first years of engagement and ents and then from parish said young people need help without really knowing one together.” marriage, makes it possible to programs. He also said they discovering the dignity and another.” To counter that, he The pope also encouraged look beyond arguments, con- should make use of the sacra- beauty of marriage. said couples should discuss couples to continue to get sup- flicts and problems and to see ment of reconciliation to find “They should be helped to what they expect and want port from their parish after the things in a broader perspec- mercy and “healing strength” perceive the attraction of a from their marriage and what wedding day and in the initial tive.” Couples should make dinners special, cooking priest says

By Carol Zimmermann – encouraging families to eat ed States. His extended family still gets ing, because she’s such a good Catholic News Service dinners together and share He told Catholic News Ser- together for big meals and his cook, said Father Patalinghug their faith at the table. His vice that when he was grow- mom still does a lot of the cook- SEE COUPLES PAGE 6B WASHINGTON – When “Spicing Up” cookbook offers ing up, his family life helped Father Leo Patalinghug was prayer and conversation topics inspire the apostolate he now leading parish marriage prepa- for couples along with pastoral dedicates his life to. It involves ration programs, he noticed advice about raising children, travels across the country Wedding Blessings couples put a lot into wedding forgiving each other, caring for giving parish workshops and planning but didn’t necessarily extended family members and speaking at conferences, ap- Crucifixes think about celebrating small aging, in between dinner and pearing on radio programs and with Papal milestones after they were dessert recipes. communicating via social me- Blessing! married such as their month In the introduction, he notes dia about the need for families anniversaries. that it “may seem strange for to celebrate everyday meals Don’t forget But as he sees it, an unmarried priest to write together. He also has written First Holy Communion! should not wait a year to cele- a book about marriage (much three books and is currently Family Bibles Gifts • Wrap brate their wedding anniversary less a cookbook about mar- working on two more. Attire Accessories but instead they should do some- riage),” but he also points out The Filipino-American Lasso Rosaries Partyware Personalized thing special once a month to that he is, to use a cooking priest is the youngest of four Holy Cards celebrate their marriage. phrase, simply trying to stir children and he jokingly says For that little bit of tradition every Wedding needs! He isn’t suggesting four- the pot and encourage couples he grew up in “Hotel Patalin- Bibles & Bible Engraving • Wall Crosses course meals necessarily but to actively work on their rela- ghug” because of his family’s New Order of Celebrating Matrimony Books • Frames simply preparing and shar- tionships. hospitality, which is so typical Unity Candles • Rosaries • Statues • Fine Art ing good food and conversa- He dedicated the cookbook, of the Filipino culture. He said Gift Wrap & Greeting Cards tion. To that end, he wrote the published in 2012, to his par- he helped or watched his moth- cookbook “Spicing Up Married ents on their 50th anniversa- er cook and they never ate din- Catholic Art & Gifts Life.” ry. Today the book is used in a ner until his father, a doctor, 6184 Florida Blvd. Baton Rouge Father Patalinghug’s apos- number of marriage prepara- came home from work, usually 225.926.1216 • www.zieglers.com tolate is “Grace Before Meals” tion programs across the Unit- around 7:30 p.m. Hours: M-F 9am-5pm; Sat. 9:30am-4:30pm 6B The Catholic Commentator CATHOLIC WEDDINGS April 28, 2017 Anything you want, honey can By Ann M. Bare prise gift for your wife. (See Special to how easy this is?) The Catholic Commentator Either/both: Reception give back menu and music, officiant, “Hey, it’s your day, Babe. Do photographer, charge card us- By Treas Erickson whatever you want. Just tell age. Special to me what time to be where.” Most couples reconsider The Catholic Commentator That may be the easy way the whole wedding day hoopla out for the groom-to-be, but it as the day approaches. “Why It takes most brides months to find just the right sure isn’t the best way to plan didn’t we just elope then come , so it is no wonder that many preserve it and your wedding. Your input is es- back for a wild reception? This tuck it away for safekeeping once the big day is over. sential — but don’t dictate too is getting ridiculous. Our mar- Some cannot bear the thought of parting with the much. Welcome to yet another riage is getting lost in the mael- dress they worked so hard to find, while others hope confusion in the female psy- strom of wedding plans. Hon- their daughters will wear their dress one day at their che. ey, by the way…I still love you.” wedding. For brides not as attached to their wed- Of course, we can’t use Each step in the process ding gown and unsure what to do with it, donation words like “never” and “al- of making your wedding day might be a good idea. ways” because every bride is memorable should be deliber- Just because you had a small fortune to spend different, but planning a wed- ate and thought out — at least a on the dress of your dreams doesn’t mean others ding can improve or damage a little bit. Your attention to your will. Help out brides in need. Donate your dress to perfectly happy engagement. mate should take priority, of a charitable organization that will make it avail- Many charitable organizations accept gently The distinct personality of course. As you respect and ac- able for other brides to wear. There are several that used and wedding for use in your relationship will be chal- commodate each other’s feel- accept gently used bridal gowns and offer them to wedding and other special events, like home- lenged during wedding plans, ings, your relationship at the brides in need. Many of these organizations will coming dances and proms. CNS photo but it also can be enriched wedding will be more positive- also accept gently used bridesmaid dresses for use ding dress. What a beautiful way to put an old gown as you discover more details ly memorable than a perfectly in weddings and other special events, like home- to good use. about what is important to arranged event. coming and prom. Along with your , you may be able each of you. Your wedding day is a cel- If you’d rather your dress be sold and the mon- to donate other items left over from your wedding, Suggested input: ebration; your marriage is a ey put to good use, there are organizations that will such as candles, centerpieces and favors. Many Both: Wedding budget, process. Groom-to-be: Keep do that, too. Many charitable organizations accept charitable organizations will accept donations of date, guest list, attendants, the planning light, doable and gently used wedding dresses, sell them and use the wedding goods to help brides in need have the wed- venue. enjoyable. Save your stress for money for a good cause, like raising awareness of ding of their dreams. Don’t throw away all of those Bride: Invitations, flow- the big stuff. Bride-to-be: You domestic violence or searching for a cure for cancer. boxes of wedding stuff sitting in your garage. Do- ers, decorations, ’ might need a buffer; thank Just think. Someone somewhere could get the help nate them instead. dresses/gifts, the cake. God for a good friend. they need to get out of a bad situation because you These are just a few ideas for giving back after the Groom: Groomsmen’s at- You’re going to be husband took the time to donate your wedding dress. big day. If you are in the initial stages of planning tire/gifts, transportation, sur- and wife. Congratulations! Can’t stand the thought of someone else getting your wedding, you may also be able to give back on married in your dress? No problem. Donate it to a the big day, whether having your guests donate to a charity that will repurpose it, for christening gowns special cause in lieu of a gift or asking your cater- or baby quilts, for example. Imagine an infant get- er to take any leftovers from your reception to the ting christened in a gown made from an old wed- nearest soup kitchen.

COUPLES  From page 5B

while coincidentally getting ready for a family gathering at his home. In his book, the priest says: “It doesn’t take an extensive study to show me that couples that take time to share a meal together have stronger relationships.” He also said this informa- tion shouldn’t surprise anyone, because if couples think back to when they first started dating Office of they’ll remember that they likely met for coffee, went on picnics or Marriage & Family Life romantic dinners. “Why stop that momentum after marriage?” he Couples who take the time to share a meal together have stronger • Respect Life asked. relationships, said Father Leo Patalinghug, whose apostolate • Marriage Preparation Dinner dates work for married “Grace Before Meals” encourages families to eat dinner together. • Marriage Enrichment couples, he points out in another chapter, but he also knows that been just as busy as they are now should anything change now?” • Family Resources many couples give the excuse that but they still made time to be to- And to that end, he would sim- they are too busy for this. gether. ply advise picking a recipe from Visit our website at: www.mfldiobr.org Again, he advises thinking “Admit it, nothing was more his book, cooking it together and or contact us at: (225) 242-0323 back to the dating stage of a rela- important than keeping that re- sitting down to eat it at the kitch- tionship, when couples may have lationship alive and well. So why en table. April 28, 2017 CATHOLIC WEDDINGS The Catholic Commentator 7B Church parishes teach children and youths about marriage

By Liz O’Connor to come through quick fixes,” he added. Catholic News Service While the number of Catholics in the U.S. continues to increase, the number LEVITTOWN, Pa. – In the effort of Catholic has been steadily to promote Catholic marriages, which declining. have been on the decline in recent According to 2014 data from the years, some U.S. parishes are mak- Center for Applied Research in the ing conscious efforts to reach out not Apostolate at Georgetown University, only to engaged couples but also to a the number of Catholic marriages re- much younger audience – children and ported – 148,134 – was less than half youths – about the church’s teaching on the number in 1964 – 352,458 – despite marriage. the number of self-identified Catholics The declining number of marriag- having grown from 48.5 million to 81.6 es is “not simply a Catholic issue but million between 1965 and 2015. a cultural phenomenon,” said Father Many dioceses and parishes con- Richard Kramer, director of the Office cerned about marriage have their hands of Family Life for the Archdiocese of full focusing on marriage enrichment A couple works on a communication exercise at a marriage preparation class. In the Washington. and the immediate preparation of cou- effort to promote Catholic marriages, some U.S. parishes are making conscious ef- “What we’re really talking about is ples that present themselves requesting forts to reach out not only to engaged couples but to a much younger audience – evangelization,” about building a differ- marriage in the church. children and youths, about the church’s teaching on marriage. CNS photo by Karen Callaway, ent kind of culture, he said. “We have to In 1981, in his apostolic exhortation Katolik teach (young people) what marriage is.” “Familiaris Consortio,” St. John Paul He suggested finding ways to make II identified three stages of marriage and sons. selves out of the church. marriage a celebration of the whole preparation: remote, proximate and Patton said the “evaporation of the “We’re not going to change this over- parish and showing couples: “Look, we immediate. sacramental understanding of mar- night,” he said, echoing Father Kramer’s want you to have what Jesus wants you Steve Patton of the Diocese of Sacra- riage” has been influenced by no-fault point. to have.” For example, honoring couples mento, California, said remote prepara- divorce policies, the widespread accep- Bozza emphasized the need “to that are celebrating jubilee anniversa- tion begins in the family at birth, as a tance of artificial contraception and speak of marriage and its truth,” noting ries – 25 or 30 or more years of mar- growing child sees those around him or the recent trend toward acceptance of that it’s not serving anybody to loosen riage – says to young people, “So can her and how they relate to each other. same-sex marriage. Marriage is seen up on church teaching on marriage in you.” Proximate preparation begins around as a vehicle for individual satisfaction, an effort to attract more people. Parish young adult ministries also puberty and continues through the he said, something that is easily aban- The Fellowship of Catholic Univer- should remind people that each of them dating years until a couple finds each doned if it ceases to bring happiness not sity Students, or FOCUS, which sends is made to give their love away to some- other and decides to marry. “That’s the only to the couple but also to the indi- teams of trained recent college gradu- one else, whether to a parent, a sibling, audience” that is not typically being ad- vidual. ates to college campuses to evangelize, a spouse or children of one’s own. dressed, Patton said. Steve Bozza of the Office for Life and puts a lot of emphasis on the idea of The priest stressed that parishes But efforts to reach larger groups Family at the Archdiocese of Philadel- vocation and helping students see both need to be intentional about their ef- are spreading. The Sacramento Dio- phia similarly said: “It’s no secret that marriage or religious life as a calling, forts to build the culture this way and cese, for example, attempts to reach the decline of marriage is a decline in said Kevin Cotter of Denver, the orga- to focus on “being a marriage-building young people with its message on mar- faith practice.” He looks at marriage nization’s senior director of curriculum. parish” where newly married couples riage through a program created and promotion as a matter of evangeliza- He said the group calls on married are immediately integrated into the life launched in the Diocese of Memphis, tion, and cited the possibilities of the couples to serve as models demonstrat- of the parish. Tennessee, that has gatherings for Year of Mercy as a time to bring back ing what married life looks like, “how “Encouraging marriages isn’t going mothers and daughters and for fathers people who have “self-selected” them- it’s possible and joyful.”

PHOTOGRAPHERS  time the photographer will From page 3B give to your wedding and the deliverables. Will you want the Natural light versus artifi- photographer to deliver prints, cial light is a matter of prefer- books, traditional albums and/ ence. or digital? – Meet with the photogra- – Give the photographer pher in person. Look for a laid a short list of shots you really back but confident photogra- want. When scouring Pinterest pher. You might ask to see the for ideas, remember that every select images from of a com- wedding is different, from the plete wedding shoot. This will time of day, season and loca- give you a good idea of the pho- tion to the people that will be tographer’s skills and image attending. quality. But most importantly: Be – Make certain you know yourself on your wedding day. G A T E H O U S E what you’re getting from your You have done your part in BOUTIQUE WEDDINGS photographer. Read thorough- planning, so now enjoy, have ly the photographer’s contract fun and let the professionals [email protected] | gatehousebr.com | 225.752.2803 or agreement. Consider the do what they do best. 8B The Catholic Commentator CATHOLIC WEDDINGS April 28, 2017

CHANGES  have a devotion to Mary. Selecting food for your reception From page 3B “We’ll talk about it and see what makes sense,” he said. “If it’s only ture.” He added that those types of going to be a photo op, I would say can be a little tricky songs could be sung before the cer- let’s not do this. We can do it at the emony begins or at the rehearsal. rehearsal.” By Tresa Erickson shrimp might work well for Foods vary widely in price. Father Ranzino also clarified “I want to be pastoral about Special to some, they might not go over so Seafood, for example, can be potential misconceptions about it because in some parishes it’s a The Catholic Commentator well for a southern-style wed- quite pricey compared to chick- the popular traditions of the couple strong tradition and it may make ding unless you’re planning to en. Buy the best you can afford lighting the and pray- sense in the person’s mind,” Father Plan your wedding for deep-fry the two. and be prepared to make some ing before the Blessed Mother. He Ranzino added. “But in the mind mid-afternoon, and food may Consider the food allergies compromises. Instead of three said neither are part of the Catho- of the church it is not in the rite. In not be much of an issue for you. of your guests. Some people meats, for example, you might lic ritual of marriage and in some truth, I am not supposed to be add- You can serve cake and punch, are so allergic to certain types have to offer two meats. countries the lighting of the unity ing things to the liturgy.” and be done with it. Plan your of food that they can go into Consider the flavor of foods. candle does not exist. The rite makes no mention of wedding near mealtimes, and anaphylactic shock at the mere If you are using a caterer, re- He called each cultural adapta- the long-standing tradition of the you better be ready to feed your whiff of it. You don’t want an quest some taste tests so you tions and said the unity candle was couple kissing after the commit- guests, else you could wind up ambulance at your reception. can make sure what will be “really created by the florists as a ment or the pronouncement of the with a lot of hungry people who Steer clear of common trigger served at your wedding will way of making some money. couple by the priest. leave sooner than expected. If foods, like peanuts and shell- please the palate. You don’t “It is not pastoral practice to do Regarding celebrating the cer- you don’t want to end up with fish, and ask around to see want to shell out big bucks on it. It is not one of the cultural ad- emony in a venue outside of a an empty dance floor, here are if there is anything else you food no one cares for and have aptations the bishops chose to put church, Father Ranzino said in some tips for serving the right should avoid. guests leaving early so they can in the rite. I don’t recommend it. It some parts of the world a bishop food. Consider the tastes of your go out to eat. can be done at the rehearsal supper may grant permission for a specific Consider the tone of your guests. Different people like People have long been feast- or after the rehearsal.” reason but in the Diocese of Baton wedding. Formal affairs might different foods. Serve a vari- ing at weddings. It is important He said praying before the Rouge the ceremony must be cele- call for a sit-down dinner pre- ety of foods to appeal to the that you take your time when Blessed Mother is a devotional brated in the church. pared by the finest caterers in masses. Give guests a choice selecting what to serve at your practice that in some parts of the Father Ranzino said overall he town, whereas informal affairs of meats and set up some food wedding. Try to accommodate country is not done but added it likes the changes and is a positive might allow for a buffet of fin- stations for those who like to as many people as possible is a common in some areas of the step for the church. ger foods prepared by friends graze. Don’t forget to include within your budget, whether diocese. “It forces us to rethink what we and family. options for vegetarians and preparing your own food or Father Ranzino said he would are doing and why are we doing it,” Consider the theme of those on restricted diets. relying upon the services of a discus the option with a couple he said. “That can be helpful for the your wedding. While fish and Consider your budget. caterer. desiring to do to determine if they church to think about.”

Celebrating 46 Years of Bridal Boutique has been Bridal Excellence! Baton Rouge’s Premier Bridal Salon since 1969.

With one of the largest selections of bridal attire in the South, locally owned Bridal Boutique has become a Southern tradition.

We invite you to become a part of that tradition.

Call to make your appointment today! 225-925-1135

8750 Florida Blvd., Second Location: Baton Rouge Bridal Boutique Off The Rack (corner of Airline & Florida) 10510 Airline Hwy., Ste. D Monday-Saturday 10am – 6pm Baton Rouge • 225-291-5055 Sundays Noon 5pm Monday – Saturday 10 am – 6pm www.bridalboutiquebr.com