LIVING IN RELATIONSHIP WITH THE OTHER: GOD AND HUMAN PERFECTION IN THE JEWISH TRADITION Implications for Jewish Communal Professionals

RABBI DR. DAVID HARTMAN Founder, Shalom Hartman Institute, Jerusalem

The biblical ideal of perfection is rooted in relationship and interdependency, in contrast to the Greek conception of perfection as self-sufficiency. Our task as Jewish communal professionals is to create communities where people can fidly develop the capacity to love and care for others. As Jews, we cannot reject the world but must live in relationship to it.

n a very deep way, our Jewishness itself is inner experiential dimension of living, spe­ Ibeing tested today. In response to this crit­ cifically freedom from neediness, including ical and challenging situation, let me analyze the need for others. and illuminate the condition of Jews today in Aristotle's conception of God expresses terms of two main visions of human perfec­ this ideal in its purest, most graphic form. tion that have shaped Western civilization: According to Aristotle, God is totally di­ (1) the Greek conception of perfection that vorced from the affairs of human history and informed the Stoic and Aristotelian traditions from any activity other than divine self-re­ and (2) the conception of God and human flection. God, the most perfect being, en­ flourishing rooted in the biblical and Jewish gages in the most perfect activity, thought, traditions. the content of which is the most perfect In the Greek tradition, self-sufficiency — subject matter, God. What does God do? not being in need of others — is an ideal to God thinks. What does God think about? which human beings should strive. The Sto­ God thinks about that which is most perfect. ics developed this idea in terms of apatheia, So God is thought on thought. the elimination of emotional involvement Aristotle's God has absolutely no interest and dependency on others. Aristotle's ideal in the human condition or in history. This of the philosopher and his conception of God impersonal God is totally distinct from and also reflect the enormous significance as­ unrelated to the personal God of history. If it cribed to self-sufficiency and independence were possible to speak of this God in human from others. terms, one would say that God is a totally In the Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle de­ self-sufficient, solitary being, the quintessen­ scribes the ideal human being, the philoso­ tial fulfillment of the Greek ideal of perfec­ pher, as a person who reaches a state of tion. self-sufficiency with respect to the contin­ Given this perspective, Athens and gencies of everyday life and the need for others. The philosopher actualizes the human Jerusalem become a stark contrast of oppo- potential to its fullest not only in terms of sites based on unbridgeable, if not incom­ knowledge - the intellectual virtues - but mensurable human ideals and theological also in terms of the practical virtues and the concepts. In contrast to Aristotle's descrip­ tion of divinity, the God of the Bible creates the world and has a deep and continuing Presented at the Opening Plenary of the lOth interest in His creation. In fact, the most Quadrennial of the World Council of Jewish striking characteristic of divinity in the Bible Communal Service, November 12, 2003 in Jerusalem. is the constant urge to project itself outside

145 Joumal of Jewish Communal Service / 146 of itself and to be in relationship with an­ sary for relationship, was never accepted other. within Judaism. The world is other than God. From a metaphysical, theological point of Humankind is other than God. Or, to sum­ view, the mystery of the Bible is why God marize the biblical account of God after the becomes so deeply enmeshed with His cre­ original act of creation: God has to learn that ation, specifically with human beings. Why He cannot fully control that which is other does God react so violentiy when the world than Himself. God, in the early chapters of does not tum out the way He, the Creator, Genesis, gradually learns that relationship expected and wanted? entails freedom, that if you control the other, The biblical narrative portrays a God who you destroy the possibility for a genuine is constantiy being offended by what human relationship. beings do. One of the most recurrent themes In contrast to the Greek ideal of perfec­ of the biblical drama is how the omnipotent tion as self-sufficiency, the biblical/Jewish God, who has great plans for the world He ideal of perfection through relationship re­ created, responds when He realizes that the quires a deep understanding and acceptance human beings He created with such great of the fact that my own fulfillment is depen­ expectations are actually undermining His dent on my relationship with an other who is original plans. free to choose not to live in relationship with God created human beings in His image, me. thinking that this would guarantee that the Every parent understands the anxiety and world would tum out according to His pain involved in arriving at this insight. In dreams. However, the creation of humans in some sense, we all believe that the children the image of God also involved the creation we "created" are going to grow up to reflect of human independence and freedom and the who we are. The great shock of being a potential for disobedience and rejection. parent is discovering that the apple can fall In the creation of human beings, God far from the tree. When I was a congrega­ expressed a divine desire for relationship tional rabbi, 1 often met with parents who with that which is other than Himself. God were beside themselves with guilt because therefore endowed human beings with free­ their children were leaving them and going dom, the essential condition of radical oth- off in strange and unfamiliar directions. emess. In the midst of an idyllic description "What did I do?" they asked despairingly. of the divine origin of the universe, the Bible "You didn't do anything," 1 told them. "You introduces the human being as a being sep­ have to realize that you don't control your arate from God, which among other things child, you are not the only influence on his or means a being capable of destroying the in­ her development." tended harmony and beauty of creation. The Becoming aware that you cannot shape story of the Garden of Eden is not a soothing, your child, your students, or your community fairy tale but the story of the unpredictable in your own image is the beginning of being dynamics of human freedom. a parent, a teacher, or a community profes­ In contrast to pantheistic religious tradi­ sional. You have to be able to work with tions, on the one hand, and to speculative people's freedom and independence, to rec­ philosophical theologies rooted in the Aris­ ognize the "othemess" of human beings. totelian tradition, on the other hand, the That the creator God had to learn this metaphysics of the Bible is informed by a lesson is one of the keys to understanding the fundamental relational matrix, which is ex­ biblical story. In the beginning God did not pressed in the philosophically "scandalous" understand this lesson, and therefore, when idea that God seeks relationship with that the world did not tum out the way He which is other than God. Pantheism, which thought it should. He decided to destroy it by obliterates the otherness and distance neces­ bringing a flood. God, however, did not

SUMMER/FALL 2004 God and Human Perfection in the Jewish Tradition I 147 choose to end the world once and for all, but Abraham and between God and the people of rather to destroy what was existing until then Israel at Sinai is ultimately grounded in the and then to start from scratch on the basis of metaphysical theme of divine self-limitation his obedient and compliant servant, Noah. for the purpose of relationship with human Noah is noteworthy in the Bible for being beings. God gives up some of His power totally subservient and docile, like a child because of His awareness that He cannot who asks no questions. God tells him to create a world through His will alone. Unless build an ark, gives him precise and complete human beings cooperate and take responsi­ instructions and measurements, and Noah bility for their lives, the world—that is, his­ says, "OK." When God reveals to him, "I am tory—cannot be shaped according to the di­ going to destroy the world," Noah says noth­ vine intention. God therefore chooses to ing. When you read this passage, you want to become dependent on human beings. shout, "Noah, don't you have anything to Abraham Joshua Heschel captured the es­ say?" But Noah says not a word. Noah has sence of biblical theology in his seminal not yet discovered his independence and work, God in Search of Man. I concur fully freedom from God. with his view that the central metaphor de­ The biblical figure who does understand scribing God in the Bible is of a divine quest his independence from God is Abraham, and and need for relationship with human beings. it is for this reason that the relationship be­ If you cannot conceive of God in such tween God and Abraham marks the begin­ graphic anthropomorphic terms, you cannot ning of Jewish history and of the Covenant. really comprehend what the Bible is about. When God realizes that He cannot do it In this tradition, the concept of perfection alone, He chooses Abraham. God makes a that informs both human and divine spheres covenant with Abraham, saying to him, involves the need for relationship with an­ "Through you the world will be blessed." other. The need for others is not regarded as When God decides to destroy Sodom, He an imperfection or an obstacle to achieving utters what is perhaps the most revealing true freedom, as the Stoics believed. Human verse in the Torah: "Hamechaseh ani flourishing involves admitting that I am meAvraham asher ani oseh" ("Shall I hide needy, that I cannot do it alone. Human from Abraham what I am about to do?"; wholeness is realized in relationship, through Gen. 18:17). God no longer acts unilaterally interdependency. in history (as in the case of the flood) but I recall a famous line from a movie I saw consults with Abraham before destroying as a young man: "Love is never having to say Sodom. This new level of interaction be­ you're sorry." What kind of love relationship tween God and human beings is described involves never having to say you're sorry? powerfully in Midrash Sifre in connection The very meaning of love and of marriage is with Abraham's use of the phrase, "the God being able to expose your vulnerability to the of Heaven and the God of the earth" (Gen. other. To want to marry and, at the same 24:3): "Ad shelo ba Avraham lo haya haka- time, to preserve your emotional indepen­ dosh baruch hu melech ela al hashamayim dence and self-sufficiency is a contradiction bilvad, umisheba Avraham himlicho al in terms. The very meaning of marriage is hashamayim veal haaretz ("Until Abraham being able to say, "I choose to live in inter­ came, God was only lord of the heavens, but dependency." when Abraham came, he (Abraham) made I would summarize the human ideal in Him (God) lord of the heavens and of the Judaism by rephrasing Descartes' existential earth"). God becomes the lord of the earth, dictum, ''cogito ergo sum "— "I think, there­ the God of history, as a result of the efforts of fore 1 am"—as "I love, therefore 1 am." It is human beings. only through relationship that I become a full The idea of a covenant between God and human being.

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The text in Genesis says: "Lo tov heyot In spite of his well-meaning and impas­ ha'adam levado" ("It is not good for a per­ sioned remarks, which were intended no son to be alone"; Genesis 2:18). Lo tov—it is doubt to encourage me to make aliyah, I said not good—is meant in the existential and not to him, "Eliezer, 1 don't accept that. On the in the utilitarian sense. A person alone can­ contrary, Israel will only survive if the world not be whole and complete. Or consider this will be responsive to its needs and will ac­ command: "Al ken ya'azov ish et aviv knowledge the legitimacy and importance of ve'imo, vedavak be'ishto" ("Therefore shall Israel as a home for Jews. If not, our future a man leave his father and his mother, and will be very bleak." shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be Our destiny as Jews depends not only on one flesh"; Genesis 2:24). Celibacy was what the rabbi says in synagogue or on what never a Jewish ideal. the General Assembly decides. What Presi­ The Jewish ideal, then, is to acknowledge dent Bush thinks is also important. What's your vulnerability and not to be ashamed of important is not only what takes place in the your needs. Knesset, but also how the world responds to Maimonides, in Mishneh Torah (Gifts to us. the Poor; Hilchot Tzedakah, Chapter 10), The very meaning of the establishment of dealing with the laws of tzedakah, encour­ the State of Israel is that the Jewish people ages a person to become self-sufficient, but chose to be dependent on the world. It is a then states forcefully that if you are in fact very hard thing for many of us to accept that needy but you are ashamed to reveal your ultimately we will not survive without the needs to others, you are a shofech damim, a support of the decent people of the world. shedder of blood. It is shfichut damim to give That is why it is so painful to witness the in to your feelings of shame and to refuse to reemergence of hatred toward Jews and to­ admit, "1 need others." You become a human ward their collective embodiment, the State being when you acknowledge interdepen- of Israel, in France, England and throughout dency, when you can say, "I need you." Europe. We are painfully aware of the ani­ Our task as Jewish communal profession­ mosity and resentment toward the Jewish als is to try to create communities where people that often lie behind the so-called people are not ashamed to admit they have 'legitimate' criticism of Israeli policies and needs. The Jewishness of our communities its leaders' rhetoric. It has become all too should be measured by the degree to which clear during the past several years that we people can experience relationships without can no longer ignore the repressed hatred shame. Our goal as Jews is to create frame­ works of human relationships where human that did not disappear with the Holocaust. flourishing consists in developing the capac­ When we recognize this tragic fact, we ity to love and to care. have a tendency to say: "Who needs this 1 recall a conversation about Jewish self- world? Who needs the goyiml Leave us sufficiency that I had with a noted Israeli alone! We are tired to listening to what you thinker, Eliezer Schweid, when 1 was plan­ think of us! We've had enough of your crit­ ning on making aliyah. He spoke to me at icism! All we want to do is to learn some length about how Israel had developed a Torah. Leave us to study our own ethics; to sense of self-sufficiency, about how we as organize our communities, social institu­ Jews could rely only on ourselves. He told tions, our families; to build Jewish unity." me about how Jews applauded Ben Gurion's If you asked me, our response to history statement, "It's not important what the goyim after the Holocaust should have been to go will think; it's important what the Jews will into the coffeehouses of Greenwich Village, do." Israel was created to provide us with a to sip cappuccinos, to read Sartre and Ca­ haven of Jewish self-sufficiency. mus, to be consumed by existential angst and

SUMMER/FALL 2004 God and Human Perfection in tlie Jewisii Tradition I 149 to whisper aloud to one another: "Oy! The victory." I told him that by talking about the world stinks." 614* commandment you are in effect giving But we did not do that. Instead we chose Hitler a victory by defining Jewishness neg­ Israel. The meaning of Israel is that Jews atively with reference to our vicious ene­ choose to be in the world, to enter into a mies. I am not a Jew because of Hitler. I am relationship with the world. It is crucial that not a Jew because of anti-Semitism. 1 am a Jews everywhere understand this concept. Jew because I fell in love with Moses' dream Israel is a response to the Holocaust because about what the Jewish people could become. we refused to allow the Holocaust to define I am a Jew not because goyim hate me. I am our selves and our attitude to the world. The a Jew because I love my Jewish tradition to meaning of being a people burdened by a the depths of my being. It is through learning covenant with God is that we do not give up Torah, through thinking deeply about the on the world, no matter how miserable it Jewish tradition, and through experiencing may be. the joy of Judaism that my identity as a Jew When we are exposed to hostility, our becomes meaningful. task is to listen, to understand, to feel it The challenge for community profession­ deeply, but not to allow it to define our als today is to make sure Jewish communi­ response. Instead, we must respond to the ties do not fall into the trap of defining them­ world from our own identity—a covenantal selves by the hatred of the goyim. The anti- identity that refuses to give up on history. I Semite's distorted vision should not dictate do not give up on the world because 1 believe our agenda. Our agenda should be defined in what Rabbi Akiva said: "Haviv adam from within our own tradition. Our agenda siienivra betselem" ("Beloved are human be­ should grow out of our own philosophical ings who were created in the image of understanding of what Judaism is about. God"). Judaism throws us into interdependency The principle of interdependency in Juda­ with the world. That is the meaning of be­ ism has two aspects: One, I do not give up on lieving in Beresltitli bara elohim et Jews, for they are part of my family and I liashamiyim ve'et ita'aretz ("In the begin­ recognize my interdependency with them. ning God created the heaven and the earth"). Two, I recognize my relationship to every While the norms of tzedakah train us to care human being because I believe in God, the for other Jews, it is the creation story that creator of the universe, who brings me into teaches us that we live in a larger world relationship with the whole world. These two where we have broad human connections dimensions of Jewish interdependency re­ and interdependencies. We must never give flect the relational ideal that shaped Jewish up our belief that "Beloved are human beings conceptions of God and human fulfillment. who were created in the image of God," no How then should we respond to crisis matter what Theodorakis or the former Prime today? By not allowing the crisis to define Minister of Malaysia says about us. No mat­ us; by not allowing anti-Semitism to set the ter what Chirac thinks or what Le Monde agenda of our learning and community cen­ writes, 1 still love Jews, 1 still love this coun­ ters; and by enabling our communities to try. learn Torah and to develop an understanding It may sound strange, but in living in of the depth of Judaism. We respond to crisis Jerusalem I have developed a closer relation­ by not allowing crisis to overcome us. Arafat ship with Christians throughout the world does not define who 1 am. than when I lived in the Diaspora. I feel more I disagreed with Emil Fackenheim - a able to reach out to the outside world be­ great philosopher of beloved memory - cause I live in Jerusalem. When I was in when he coined the notion of the 614* com­ Montreal I lived like a yesliiva bucliur (tal­ mandment: "not giving Hitler a posthumous mudic student). A yesliiva buchur lives

SUl^MER/FALL 2004 Journal of Jewish Communal Service I 150 within the world defined by his Rebbe's For me, Israel is where Jews can live in shiur (lecture). open dialogue with the world. Why? Be­ When I studied in Lakewood, I was struck cause here we can really feel rooted as Jews. by the expression: "za welte kasha" ("It's a We can feel anchored in our identity; we can world question"). I wondered to myself, "If feel pride walking the streets of Jerusalem. this is a world question, then everyone must Instead of creating a Jewish ghetto, a surro­ be asking themselves this question!" So I gate shteibl, Jerusalem creates a Jewish went into the streets of Lakewood and asked world that is open to the larger, outside people, "Excuse me, are you bothered by this world. I say this not because I'm a fervent question?" Needless to say, their response, if liberal, a true believer in pluralism, a fol­ any, was to question my sanity. lower of John Stuart Mill or an insecure Jew When we are immersed in a yeshiva who wants to be liked by the goyim. I say this framework, we think the world coincides simply because I am a Jew. And being a Jew with our daled amot (four cubits), our private means living with two stories. One is about a little shteibl. This kind of ghettoization of God who throws me into the world and does consciousness is, unfortunately, taking hold not allow me to give up on it. The other is of Jews in some circles of Orthodoxy today. about a God who throws me into the Jewish "Our world is the world! Nothing of value people and says, "Don't give up on your exists outside of us." This is the great danger people no matter what. Don't abandon them. of unconstrained forms of nationalism. It can Don't destroy their spirit." breed narcissism, a false sense of self-suffi­ As community professionals from around ciency: "We can only rely on ourselves; we the world we have a vital and important don't need or belong to the larger world; mission to keep the Jewish people healthy, to what the larger world thinks doesn't concern keep them learning, and to liberate them us in the least." from the poison of anti-Semitism.

SUMMER/FALL 2004