Spectator Australia

Preston advertising Jenny Craig as they didn’t think it’d be a good fit for the show. Kitchen sink drama On the other hand, the network apparent- ly has no problem with other judge George Why are we hooked on MasterChef? Calombaris flogging butter in the ad breaks. Says it all, really. lucy saunders Even the unabashed fans of MasterChef Australia don’t always seem to be enjoying it. The MasterChef Facebook page regu- ooking forward to next Sunday night? show draws criticism for its focus on emo- larly has to ban commenters for making If not, you’re in a minority. One of the tional journeys rather than technical skill. vicious personal comments — and occa- Lmost significant events on the Austral- The title sequence sums it up: only two or sionally threats — about contestants they ian entertainment calendar is coming up and three of the final contestants are actual- found particularly irritating. Accusations unless you spend the next fortnight in a sen- ly shown cooking. The rest are variously of vote-rigging and favouritism are inescap- sory deprivation chamber I guarantee you laughing while looking at food, waving bits able. People are emotionally shattered when won’t be able to avoid having a conversation of fabric or dropping apples. Winning a their favourites lose and enraged when those about it. No, it’s not a sporting event — it’s challenge seems to depend as much on how they see as undeserving somehow survive. not even an election. It’s the final showdown well the contestants can bravely struggle to Matt the Goth, booted off for sneaking in a of an amateur cooking competition. Two hold back tears about how much this dish smartphone, will be a brave man to venture wannabe chefs will be baking off against meant to their long-lost aunt or dead par- out in public in the next couple of months each other, for fun and profit. Yep, that’s it. rot as it does about how well they’ve actu- (and not just because of his stupid haircut). Although Matt Preston has yet to suc- ally cooked. Fans of the original UK version My blood pressure rises every time I see ceed in his campaign to make cravats socially are increasingly cranky that the high-drama, Ellie drop something and giggle, and if Dani acceptable, he and his fellow judges have still emotionally-charged Australian format has gives up halfway through a dish again I will made quite a significant impact. This is year begun to be adopted internationally. On the smash something. You’d think most peo- three of MasterChef, and it looks like ple would have too much aggravation in the nation’s still mad for it. More than their lives already to bother getting emo- three million people watched Poh fail to tionally invested in the cooking woes of impress the whitey judges with a hun- half-competent strangers, but apparently dred-year-egg during the finale in 2009. you’d be wrong. Even more watched a nice young law- Angry fans aside, though, the show yer and a kid who looked 15 try to rec- itself is relentlessly positive. Even when reate a ludicrous dessert in 2010. That the contestants are crying about some episode was the third most watched family tragedy — or, more often, just show in Australian television history. about the fact they’re a bit crap — the This season is rating even higher. Who three judges and the heartwarming cares about Don Bradman or the wattle soundtrack are there to make everything — any future citizenship test need only OK. In this spirit, this season someone ask the names of the finalists. even nobly sacrificed himself on the altar Last year’s final clashed with the of elimination to save a more commit- National Debate between Julia Gillard ted but less skilled contestant, showing and Tony Abbott, a long-established a fundamental misunderstanding of how tradition of Australian democracy. A talent-based competitions work. One of cooking show up against the centrepiece the best episodes of the season was last of the federal election campaign was Monday, when the contestants cooked never going to be a fair contest. Unsur- for their families who they hadn’t seen prisingly, MasterChef won hands down. in months, with no threat of elimination. Both major political parties — perhaps It was difficult not to be touched by the too busy fighting to the death over the sight of Kate reuniting with her very tel- colour of the lectern — conceded the egenic small children. Of course, later in awesome power of MasterChef without the show the kids’ hopes of seeing Mum a struggle and moved the debate forward an other hand, who needs a focus on technical come home for dinner were ripped away as hour. Fair enough, too – who’d choose lis- cooking skills when you’ve got heart, great she didn’t quite cook well enough to win, but tening to an hour of ‘moving forward’ and Aussie characters and most importantly an that’s another issue. ‘stop the boats’ on loop over watching some enormous pile of money for the producers The creators of MasterChef have accom- teenager fail to identify hollandaise sauce? to sleep on? plished an astonishing thing. I have no inter- The mania for MasterChef is not just So what is it about this show that has hyp- est in cooking, celebrity chefs or reality domestic. The show is syndicated across notised the nation? It can’t be a newfound television contestants, but next Sunday I’ll the world, from Asia to the Arab League love of cooking. I didn’t cook before Mas- join the majority of the television-viewing to Israel. It’s shown in prime time slots a lot terChef and I don’t now, although I have public in watching someone win a hundred of the time. At eight o’clock each night in found myself plating up my takeaway pad grand and someone else get enough expo- the Netherlands, people sit down and watch thai when nobody’s watching. It’s also not sure to start their own vanity TV project. I’m Australian amateur chefs try to cook tasty connected to any impulse to improve our still not sure why. food. Who knew there was so little to do in nutrition. You’d be lucky not to have a heart the Netherlands? MasterChef Australia may attack eating the food these guys cook. The Lucy Saunders, a law student at the well be our most successful non-crocodile- advertising choices sum up MasterChef’s University of Sydney, writes MasterChef themed cultural export. commitment to good health pretty neatly. episode recaps at www.shuckittome. Of course, not everyone’s impressed. The Channel Ten allegedly stopped judge Matt wordpress.com the spectator australia | 30 July 2011 | www.spectator.co.uk/australia ix