"The only way to make sure people you agree with can speak is to support the rights of people you don't agree with."- Eleanor Holmes Norton Volume XXXIII, Number 8 1000 Hilltop Circle, Baltimore, MD 21250 October 20, 1998 UMBC For Sale? Police Chief Anonymous Fliers Garner Leaves Laughter - and Irritation After Years
JAMIE SMITH HOPKINS ling five years ago. It's very clear of Service Retrievu Wukly Staff Writer that we have not reduced funding." Student Government Association PAT FURGURSON The fliers aren't eye-catching, but (SGA) leaders, however, think the Retriever Weekly Staff Writer what they have to say has captured fliers are weU founded. the attention of students and admin "It shows that the students out After five years of commuting 75 istrators alike: there are thinking, that they are con miles each way from his home in "For Sale: A Midsize Public Uni cerned with their education and that Hagerstown, MD, UMBC Police versity," proclaim the anonymous they're not wi lling to lie down and Chief and Civi l War buff David missives, which are decorated with let the arts programs die," said Der Yohman has decided to take a job UMBC's logo and have recently rick Longo, speaker of the SGA closer to home- and closer to his appeared across campus. "Prefer senate. "There are valid concerns Jason Pu1sche I Relriever Weekly Staff passion. ence Given to Defense Industry. behind this." Free and Loving It: Members of the Freedom Alliance made a Beginning November2 he will be WiJI Cut Arts to your Specs." Nonetheless, when he and other statement against hate at the National Coming Out Dance on taking over as head of the campus Students responded with laugh SGA members first saw the fliers, Friday. See story on Page 10. police department at Gettysburg ter, but administrators are not they couldn't help but laugh. '------l College. amused. "I thought I'd died and gone to The rest of the fake ads' content c andleli. ght v.· gi·l heaven when this opportunity came "I think it's an unfortunate ap promotes UMBC as a campus with proach that someone is using to "I 0,000 impressionable students, along," Yohman said from his home, where he is recovering from make a point," said campus Presi Classic red brick architecture, Ad- 0 0 dent Freeman Hrabowski. "Some ministration that caters to your H n rs slain Student minor abdominal surgery. one has misinformation .... The arts needs" and a "Food service mo- "UMBC has been a great place, I and the humanities areas are con nopoly." Despite Tragedy, Freedom Alliance hope I was able to improve on what tinuing to get the [proportionate] "Call 410-455-3880," it con- was here. It was a difficult deci level of support that they were get- cludes. "Ask for Freeman!" Celebrates Gay History Month sion," he said. Other anti-UMBC messages Yohman has been a interested in have also popped up on the Civil War for years and, because GABEMARCUS campus-with no indi such as security issues. A large group of their proximity to his home, the Retriever Weekly Staff Writer cation of whether they attended, packing the room with battles of Antietam and Gettysburg A Midsize Public University are connected to the fl i bodies. in particular. To find a job doing ers. Stenciled on the Uni The UMBC Freedom Alliance held a candlelight vigil next to the see VIGil, page 3 see POLICE, page 4 versity Center in black UMBC pond on Thursday in r------., are "Under Management UMBC memory of Matthew Shepard, the by Corporations" and "UMBC inc." openly gay student from the Univer sity of Wyoming who was severely ncludes: But the niers are • 10.000 ompress10nable students what's prompting stu beaten to death earlier this month. • Classc red brick architecture dents to talk. Members of the Freedom Alliance - Admoi\IStratoon that caters to your needs "I have been formed a circle at the vigil and spoke out against hate. • Food SCMCe monopoly here at UMBC for five years. and this is the best "The idea of hating someone be fore you meet them just because Preference Given to Defense tndust example of biting sar casm I have seen yet ... they're part of a group is ridiculous," said K.aty Schuman, a 19-year-old Will Cut Arts to your Specs. said Navy Chana, a se nior who is researching junior majonng in English. art students· opinions Before the vigil,the Freedom Al about the state of their liance held it's monthly meeting earlier than its usual time of seven MAKE A BID: Copies of this department. ·• ... I am particularly o'clock- to discuss current issues anonymous flier have appeared intrigued by this flier.'' BRAIN POWER: As the highest rated USA chess player under age across campus. that include homosexuality but are 18, Eugene Perelshteyn represents UMBC at the October 10 chess See SALE, page 4 relevant to all students on campus. match against Stanford. For story, see page 2.
Anna Kaplan ex· Play Twister with the Volleyball wins College plains why Russian Freedom Alliance, 200th for Lavery, News democracy isn't vi make waves with Men's soccer scores .•• R· 2 able, Katy Schuman WMBC, kill your two straight victo World wants you to smell wife with the ries, John Mischke News the flowers, and Jes. BaltimoreOpera talks realignment, •.• p. 3 sica Rothfus thinks Company and spend and Chris Kerner en Classified sex-ed is a must for A Night At The fans to Ads teens. Roxbury. ... p. 32 PAGE2 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS October 20, 1998
MPT Hosts Special Screening of Film and the credit bureaus. Once someone is re 100. IOOA. IOOY. IOIH and 110): the other Series poned. getting a checking account or a Joan may categories are open to all UMBC students. The Baltimore Community Relations Com be difficult for at least seven to 10 years. Ac The \\riling contest co~iSL'> of an essay in mission and community partners arc hosting a cording to the Security Department at State MLA-style format of no more than 750 words special screening of the MPT film series Afri Employees Credit Union of Maryland. students that addres!>l!s one of four possible topics con COIIS 111 America. Joumey 111mugh Slavery to· have lost hundreds, even thousands of dollars. cerning AIDS. The topics are: UMBC Research night at 6:30 in the Union Baptist Church, 1219 While this example portrays the scam artist as (i.e., review current AIDS research being con Hacker Pleads Guilty Druid Hill Avenue. a male preying on a female ~tudent. other sce ducted by UMBC and bring readers up to !>peed CAMBRI DGE, Mass. An accused Baltimore native Orlando Bagwell. the Ex narios have occurred. on advances and goals, discuss findings in an computer hacker who infiltrated the ecutive Producer of Africans in America, Jour Campuses where this scam has succeeded arc expository paper which includes commentary computer networks at Harvard. ney Through Sllll•ery. will be present to address Coppin State College. Morgan State University. by the author); Interview of a Person Living Amherst College. Bowdoin College those in attendance. Bagwell is also known for Towson University and University ofMaryi
from VIGIL, page I
Sydney Lewis. president of the group. a 21- year-old senior majoring in English and psy chology commented on homosexuals being a target or hate crime. ··sometimes rm worried, ltake my safety for granteu:· she said. Lewis went on to say that she doe'> not think of hcr:,df a' a target when she walh alone in a parking lot or places pro-homosexual bum~r Sexual Precautions stickers on her car:, and residential doors. But The new ''baggy" condom produce(.) b)' after last year's disfigurement of the Alliance's Mayer Laboratoncs to Oakland, CA. chalkings on campus. some members of the went on saJe in the Netherlands in May. gro~p realized that the perceived safety on but company president David Mayer said college campuses is a dangerous illusion. Gabe Marcus I Remever Weekly Stafl il will be at least a year before it gets FDA Andrele Cummings, a member of the group A TIME OF DARKNESS: UMBC students shed light against homophobic hate approval for sale in the U.S. The condom said, "We don't do anything alone." during a candlelight vigil held in honor of University of Wyoming student Matthew 1s tighter at the base but otherwise much "It's a real jolt for us. We're fighting for Shepard, recently beaten and killed because he was a homosexual. looser than current condoms, providing picky stuff now, not that we· re putting our lives "more sensation:· said Mayer. and sells in danger," added Schuman. pressing sympathy and compassion to the bookstore in Baltimore. They also held a bake for about twice as much. At the meeting. the group discussed a web University of Wyoming community in the sale in an effort to raise money for the club. site- www.godlzatesfags.com- which was wake of Shepard's death. Originally. they scheduled a dance for Octo Really Stupid Ideas reviewed two weeks ago in an opinions article Dr. Reginald Neules, director of the Coun ber 9, but it was postponed until the 16th. Twenty years ago. at least 9.000 of The Retriever Weekly. seling Center and Student Health Services said, "The people you're most afraid of finding people. including many children, were Lewis described this web-site - "vehe 'When things like this happen, people are very out you're gay at this age are your parents.'' tortured and killed by the Argentine mili mently homophobic," she said-as depicting deeply affected. We want you to know you can Mindy Schuman, Supervisor of School Psy tary government. yet the makers of Die the Grim Reaper holding hands with another check in with us.'' chologists for the! City of Baltimore said. sel jeans were set to run an ad in an Ar character with the word "Fag" on it. Along with Despite the recent tragedy. the Freedom Al Schuman, also an associate professor at gentine magazine in April that showe<.l this crude black and white cartoon are various liance is continuing to promote acceptance of Towson University, has had personal experi jeans-clad kids underwater chained to quotes from the Bible. which are used to sup homosexuality on campus. Some members of ence with prejudice against homosexuals. She cement blocks with the suggestion that port an attack on homosexuality. The organi the Alliance openly declared their homosexu explained that when she came out to a group they'd at least look cool whi Je drowning. zation that hosts the web site. Westboro Bap ality to friends and family on October 11, Na of students she received hate-mail. Schuman fn May the Korean car maker Kia had tist Church, plans to picket Matthew Shepard's tional Coming Out Day. And to help celebrate encourages more students to publicly acknowl to scrap ao ad Featuring a Princess Diana funeral in order to ''rescue ... homosexuals edge their homosexuality, explaining that it is October as Gay History Month -a time when look-a-like surviving a paparazzi chase from a life of sin and shame." not a characteristic of herself or others that gays, bisexuals and lesbians come out and sup because she was riding in a Kla. And in Vice-President of Student Affairs Charles should be bidden. port each other in a public arena - the Free June. the Leo Burnett agency discarded Fey briefly stopped by the meeting and ex dom Alliance held a table in the UC Plaza. "People assume I'm straight. I don't want a planned ad campaign 111 Thailand fea plained to the group that he wrote a lcuer ex- selling books from Lambda Rising, a gay them to assume I'm straight,'' she said. turing "Adolf Hitler" being transfonned into a good person - stripping otT his FOR WOMEN ONLY! Nazi uniform. dancing merrily-on the basis of eating a new brand of potato chip. Researchers at the Johns Hopkins Hospital, Dept. of Neurology, are The Gods of Weather POLICE LOG studying pain perception changes After a surprise. two-foot snowfaU in Moscow. Russia. in April. Mayor Yuri M. SAFETY TIP OF THE WEEK: Theft from Building during the menstrual cycle. Luzhkov fired the meteorologists, saying Do you: October 10. 3:35 p.m. -- An employee re he would get his weather forecasts by • Jog or walk by yourself early in the ported that a student informed him that two We seek women volunteers, ages other means. morning or late at night when the streets computers were removed from the ECS And in May, Mayor Kttisak of the arc quiet and deserted? 18-45, who are experiencing either building. The preliminary investigation con northern Thailand town of Sena tried to • Stuff your purse with ca'ih, keys, credit back pain or kidney stone pain. finned that two computers were removed end a six-month drought by installing two cards, checkbook-and then leave it wide from the building but failed to identify any There are no risks involved with dozen 10-foot-long inflated phalluses. open on a counter. a desk, the floor? Put suspects. The combined total loss value for participation in the study. The which by local folkJore would bring rain. your waUet in a jacket. whkh you then the computers is $2515. The investigation study aims to develop better pain Citizens rebelled when the installation hang up or throw over a chair? will continue. • Let your mind wander when walking or management strategies for women. was instead followed by fires. driving? Theft For Information call Jean at What's In a Name? • Think it's a waste of time to lock your October 8, 5:09 p.m. -- On residential 410-614-5775 or e-mail car when you'll be back in a few min In a March letter to Britain's Navy grounds, a student reported that someone re clsander@ welchlink. welcb.jhu.edu News, a group of sailors on the HMS utes'! moved his credit card from hi!> pants pocket. If you answered ''yes'' to any question, RPN: 97-08-I 5-!11 Brave complained that their ship is one Upon contacting the company that autho Principal Investigator: Ur..ula Wcs..elmann, MD. Ph.D. you need to change a few habits. Spend of a few in Her Majesty's Navy with a rized the card. he learned that someone had name they could be proud of and that the a few minutes now to evaluate your safety charged over $200 to his account. Currently, habits and prevent trouble later. navy's mission is compromised by some there are no suspects. The investigation will of the other ships' names, such as HMS continue. Sick Person Beaver. And in March, police in Fullerton. Ca October 7. 8:11 a.m. -- An Abacus em Theft lif.. proposed that the city council emas ployee was transported to St. Agnes Hos October 8. II :31 p.m. - While studying at culate the troublemaking Baker Street pital by ambulance personnel after he was the library a student reported someone re Gang by renaming its current stomping observed to display flu-like symptoms. moved a one-hundred dollar bill from her grounds Pansy Circle. The council re wallet. A suspect was identified. The inves jected Pansy Circle as possibly offensive Sick Person tigation will continue. October 8, I0:45 a.m. - In the Food Ser to some gay men and settled on Iris Court. vice Oflice, an employee of Kelly Temp. Sick Person Every Hair is Sacred Services complained of severe stomach October 12. 2: I 0 a.m. -- In Patapsco HaJJ, a cramping. Ambulance personnel Arbutus Recent Rabbinical Rulings, according resident !>tudent wa~ reported experiencing F.D. responded and checked the victim's an !!motional crisis. She i::. reported to have to the Israeli daily newspaper Yeuiot vital signs. The victim refused treatment allempted drinking a cleaning solution in Allronot: No nose picking on the Sabhath upon learning that her \ita! signs were front of some friends. She was transported because that might dislodge hairs inside nonnal. to St.Agnes Emergency Care and evaluated/ the nose. And wives must be home by treated on a voluntary basis. midnight. even if the husband is still om carousmg. PAGE 4 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY NEWS October 20, 1998
UMBC president Freeman Hrabowski said Guard as a planning and operations officer Chief's Years Here Are Yohman is an unusual human being. before corning to UMBC in 1993 as interim "He clearly has great experience in police chief. work, and at the same time he is also a very The University will name an acting chief compassionate man- that balance is rare," from within the Department by the end of Fondly Remembered Hrabowski said. "He has a clear commitment the month, according to Associate Vice Presi to the students and the community. He set a dent for Academic Affairs Leland Beitel. from POUCE, page 1 All those and more have "helped to im tone by his leadership, and we have been for "We will then begin a national search for a prove the perception of safety," Yohman said. tunate to have him." permanent replacement." Beitel said. police work within a college community with One particular case he remembered oc Yohman spent nearly 25 years with the In the meantime, Lewis said, ''We will just an office virtually overlooking "that hallowed curred just after his arrival at UMBC. There State Police before retiring in 1992. He then keep this thing going like be [Yohman] was ground is like a dream come true," for the had been a rash of six robberies on campus spent a year with the Maryland National on vacation.'' 55-year-old former Maryland State Police which had made the Channell3 News. officer. '1t was scary for folks", Yohman said. One "I have walked over the fields there [at officer, a retired Baltimore County police Gettysburg] and I just get this feeling, the man who has since left the UMBC force, bravery of those men, it is unbelievable," he had received a tip and through ,''good police Arts Support Questioned said. "Now, being so close to all that, I am work and crime analysis we were able to just lucky." make an arrest and solve the case,'' Yobman garded at UMBC has been around for1:twhile The commute to UMBC was the biggest said. From SALE, page I -in fact, since he carne here 30 years ago. factor in his decision to look for something "It was the epitome of good policing, and "I think that Dr. Hrabowsk:i has been very closer to home. Yohman wanted to stay in it made me proud,'' he added. SGA Senate Secretary Sean Davis made supportive of the arts, but there's always been an academic setting because he has come to The officer who made the arrest was rec copies of the one he noticed in the Engineer a feeling among the arts folks that they have enjoy the "collegial feeling they talk about.·· ognized for his superior work. ing/Computer Science building Friday and never gotten their due here." he said. "I have Yohman said that the spirit of cooperation The chief's special assistant Manuel Lewis sent them off to Hrabowski and other admin never thought that was correct, but I suppose among all the departments- the faculty. stu has known Yohman since he was at the State istrators-just so they would be sure to no there's that tension at all universities." dents and staiT-will be his greatest memory. Police academy in 1973. tice. Hrabowski attributes such feelings here to ''The things we accomplished ... ," he said, "He was our corporal." said Lewis. The two "I think it's hilarious," he said. "1 think UMBC's reputation as a science and engi wit11 particular emphasis on the we,"... wiU men have shared assignments over the years maybe a [senate] resolution applauding who neering college. But he said that administra probably be v.hat I remember most." and Lewis was the chief's lieutenant at the ever drev. it up would be appropriate." tors are "committed to having a balanced According to Yohman tllose accomplish State Police Academy. . But if Longo has his way, the fliers' mes university" and have been working to get ments include: adding six officers to the force Lewis laments the chief's departure but sage will go beyond that. He envisions it on outside support for tlle arts and humanities. tllrough the COPS Program (a federal grant said that is nothing new. cars and trucks across campus. Recently, he said. UMBC officials con to put more police on the street). establish ''He has always had an uncanny knack for If the senate approves. he plans to print up vinced a couple to donate $1 million to the ing a "community policing" strategy with disappearing." Lewis said jokingly. ··He had a batch of2,000 to 5.000 bun1per stickers with Artist Scholar program. more foot patrols, beginning a dialogue with an assignment at the FBI Academy and left "For Sale: A MidsiLe Public University" and SGA leaders just hope that the lliers' au studenLS through "Pizza with tlle Police," the us with 121 new recruits at the Stale Police the UMBC logo. He's also considering the thor-or aut110rs-will come speak to them. series of sessions aimed at airing student con Academy. Things get a little tough and he addition of ·'Free Library with Every Pur "The students have a legitimate concern," cerns and needs. and starting programs to disappears." chase." Proceeds would go to charities. said Davis. "I really personally hope iliey will create more crime awareness and reduce "Looks like he's doing the same thing According to Vice Provost Charles ·Tot" bring it to us. I think we have a problem here. thefts from offices. now," Lewis added. Woolston. the opinion that the arts are disre- I'd like to see what we can do to correct it." INSTA!vT CREDIT ~tP Guaranteed Credit Cards with Credit Limits ~ae.. Up To $10,000 Within Days! S No CREDIT, No JoB, No PARENT SIGNER, No SECURITY DEPOSIT! no credit • bad credit • no income? ~~=--...... If You Think You can't Get A Credit Card, Think Again. Wa11t VISA & MasterCard Credit Cards?
------~------,I ORDER FORM I I want Credit Cards immediately. GUARANTEED APPROVAL YES! CRA, PO Box 16662, ATLANTA, GA 30321 Name ...... Address...... City...... : ...... State...... Zip ...... Signature...... Tired of Bein Turned Down? October 20, 1998 PAGE S OPINION 'T I-I E Letters to the Editor ETRIEVER Editor: I agree with Chris Kneg's scnument about getting s1ckand tired of the Clinton/l C\\ in..'i.k) scandal (Opmion, October 6 issue). But thut is where our agrecsment ends. l am equally s1~k and ttred ofheanng Clmton's defenders say it's only sex. WEEKLY It's more than sex. Its the comrmting of adultery. It' brcakmg the marital vow of fiddit).lt's hlatantl) lying_ to hr~ 0\\ n fanul), Ius advisors and l.twycrs, .md the American Editor-in-Chief Opinion Editor General Manager people It's trying to 3\l)td Ius moral responsibilities with legal Jargons. John .Mischke Emily Bernstein Raymond Dubicki Based on the quotes by the man now tn the Wh1tc Hou!ic, tt'!) the hctght of hy pocnsy · "Every trme Bush talks about trust. it makes chill nm up and down my spine The \CI) 1dea that thew ord 'tru!>l' could come out of Mr. Bush's mouth niter what he's done to thts country and the \\ay he's tmmplcd on the truth ts 1 ll'3\esty of the Amcncnn Tbe Yearly Lecture pohtical system.'' tThc New York Times. Oct 29, 1992, p A I, when Chnton was c.un paigning against Bush). Why i~ it that every year we here at 11te Retriever Weekly are given a reason to promote "There s JUSt no ~u~,;h thing as truth when 11 come.~ to h1m [Bush). He JU'-t :.a) s what tolerance or the different cultures. beliefs and lifestyles that make up our campus'? Why C\ cr sounds good and wurnes ,tbout it after the election." (Same l.iOllrce as ahove.) can't we go one year with out a hate crime or a ridiculous show of ignorance directed toward llere is what he srud in 1974 .~bout impeaching President Nixon: "There's nothing left a group only because that group is seen as cl{fferem'? to say. There's not any pomt now m his putting the country through an tmpeachment Last \\Cek the Freedom Alliance's banner that hung in front of the UC was stolen. Al smcc he 1sn't making any pretense of innocence now." though this incident is not nearly as blatant as the inexcusahle anti-gay chalkings we usually "I thmk 1t's plain that the pres1dent should resign and span.: the countf) the agony of denounce. It is enough to make us \\orry. th1s rmpcachment and r~:moval proceeding." Also last week. a sLUdem at the Uni,ersity of Wyoming died from being pistol-whipfl\!d "I thmk the counlr) could be !>pared .t lot of agony and Ute govemment could WOIT) into a coma. His killers tied him up a-. though he was a scarecrow, beat him and left him in about mnation and a lot of other problems if LNixon would! go and .md res1gn .." the cold for almost a day. His name was Matthew Shepard and he was like any of us On another front. When any man (or woman) Q\:cupieo; the White House, he no longer however, he was considered very "different" by h1s k1llers. hns a prh ate life by\ irtue of his position. Whether he likes or not, he has become a role Shepard was the innocent victim of a blatant. violent hate crime. He was gay and his model for our children. Very few children would say they would like to bec<,mC the CEO kille!'l> made it a point to attack ·him for that reason only. ol Chrysler, for example. Hut man) aspire to become the president of the USA. What Maybe we cannot liken our campus' anti-gay problems to those at Wyoming. but it takes kind role model is Clinton for them? only one hate-filled person to commit an atrocity like this. We need to put our collective foot To be technically accurate. none of the improper sexual contacts (10 of them acc01dmg down a-; a community and say that thil. behavior. no matter how slight, is wrong. unwarrentcd to Lcwmsky) took place m the pri' ate quarters on the thtrd lloor. All of them took place and unwanted. ncar the Oval Office and during the conduct of official business Smce when arc behav Thankfully Shepard's killers have been charged with murder and held without bail. But. it IOrs in the office and during work bours cono;idcred pri\atc'l Furthermore. this was not a is sad that they. like most of us. arc college age and yet ignorant to a degree that has been one-night stand but a long tcnn relationship. condemned for several generations. Just because no pumshment was meted nul for pa-;t tram;gresson> does not mean that Remember. it takes only one ignorant person to destroy a community. the same behavior should be ignored now.ln the past months, the media have reported the downfall of many a military leader because of sexual indiscretions. Should the Com and a Miss mander-in-Chief of the am1ed forces have a lesser standard? I lit Quit beating the messenger. Ken Starr was chosen by a Democrat-appointed auomey general to do n thankless job. And faithfully he did his duty. The campus anxiously awaited hi!. arrivaL Students, professors and UMBC staffers alike Rescue America. Impeach Clinton! eagerly amicipated the lecture from infamous Steven Jay Gould. But as usual on the campus where nothing happens. still nothing happened. Due to his hospiltalization. Steven Jay Gould Joseph C. H. Lee was unable to present his much awaited lecture. leaving the UMBC campus community Education major disappointed. But let's look at the positive aspect of this frustration - the campus community was really, truly excited about this lecture. Finally. someone on campus came up with a great F.ditor: idea to get people involved, and The Retrie1•er Weekly would like to see more of this. Yes. The article I read about Barhie and her impact on young girls allowed me to contem we understand that Gould's hospitalizauon was unforsceable. Yes, we understand that h1s plate her impact in my sister's life. I wonder what land of messages my sLc;ter was getting publicist is giving campus administrators a run around a-; to rescheduling the lecture. But DO NOT give up! Let's get this lecture rescheduled before the excitement dies down and see LETTERS. pag~: 10 the community returns to its normal apathetic self. Also, let's get some more excitement rolling by shceduling additional lectures and activities of this caliber. Jennifer Siciliano ...... Managing Editor Rerrie1•er Weeki\ staff editorials reflect the Tracy Soltesz ...... News Editor views of the editonal board; signed columns University for Sale Bmd Bennett ...... Asst. News Editor represent the opinions of the individual writ Jessica Rothfus ...... Asst. Opinion Editor ers and do not necessarily reflect those of The Recently. spoof fliers have been po1>ted all over campus proclaiming ''For Sale: A MidsiLe Christtna Sabato ...... Features Editor Retriever Weekly or the University of Mary Public University" and outlining. in advertisement fom1, some of the more prominent com Elaine Elgamil ...... Focus Editor land Baltimore County. plaints students have about UMBC. Vcrgil Bu~hnell ...... Asst. Focus Editor Letters to the editors are printed verbatim, Who posted these notices is curremly unknown, but their purpose is nonetheless crystal Chri~ Kerner ...... Sport~ Editor although the editors reserve the right to edit clear. These anonymous po~tcrs struck a chord with many students who saw the fliers and Andrew Smullian ...... Asst. Sports Editor any letter deemed lengthy, repetitive, libel laughed at the satire. Jason Putsche ...... Photogmphy Editor ous or otherwise in need of revision. The Whether or not their message is correct. it carries with it the sentiment expressed by a Amy Banowetz .... A!'>M. Photography Editor edllors further reserve the right not to print large portion of UMBC students that the art!> ar..: being shafted \\ hile the sciences continue to Kimberly Brossard ...... Production Manager any letter for any reason. Letters to the Edi boom. Jamie Peck ...... Production Assistant tor must be typed or written legibly and in Clearly. there needs to be more dialogue between the students and the administration about Carl Gchnnan ...... Production Assistant clude the author's name and telephone num this conception. President Hrabowski states that the support for arts and humanities is pro Autumn Palterson ...... Production Assistant ber. The author's name may be withheld upon portional to what it was five years ago. This tells us part of the story. but not the entire story. Rabmh Mayas ...... Producuon Assistant request. Letters must be received by 12 p.m. If the funding was excellent then. then perhaps students should take a second look at the1r M1ke Mussman ...... Production Assistant on Thursday and may not exceed 400 words. complaints. However, if five years ago. students felt that the arts were not getting enough Amber Aurich ...... Copy Editor The Retrie1•er Weekly subscribes to the Col funding, there is linle reason to believe that their feeling would change as the funding re Deb VanDereedt ...... Business Manager lege Press Service and publishes weekly on main~ proportionate. Ro~ Tipltino ...... Advertising Manager Tuesdays during the regular school year. Edi We can appreciate the creativity in these fliers to get this message across. but we hope the John Sm1th ...... Circulation Manager tors can be reached at 455-I 260 during nor dialogue is only just beginning. Whate\er the group is that is posting these fake ads. it Dave Chen ...... Scmor Photogmpher mal business hours or at University Center should put its money where its mouth is and face up to the administration with its concerns. Cameron Slayden ...... Cartoomst 214. 1000 Hilltop Circle. UMBC. Baltimore. 'lony Fitzwater ...... Opcr.Hions Manager MD 21250. The Rerrie1·er Weekly is an equal Christopher Corbett ...... Faculty Adviser opportunity employer. PAGE6 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION October 20, 1998 Dentocracy in Russia Is Problematic, But Still Possible
Anna Kaplan the revolutionaries told ing, and their education and medicine were them. Centuries of free. So people learned that whatever be working for the feudal longed to the public belonged to them per With the shield of our flag and constitu lord suddenly turned sonally. thus the current difficulty of starting tion. it is difficult for the general voting. busi into working for the private businesses. This lack of recognition ness-owning U.S. public to imagine freedom community, an inde of private property is one of the main hin as anything but an assumed, internalized scribably sweeter idea, drances to an American-style system that the value. The power of choice, the power to help yet the ideas one works Western world is attempting to set up in the oneself: these to us are core values, so in for do not change one's former Soviet Union. theory when a people is freed from the iron mentality. Serfs became A democracy's main requirement is the fist of dictatorship they should naturally rise farmers and workers, population's ability to think for itself, which up and establish themselves as guides to hu but their actions were is what Russians were never allowed to do. man behavior and government. A freedom still directed by an out For the past 80 years. they were told by their of-choice-based democracy should now pre side power, a power that dictators they were free, so they internalized vail in a country like Russia, since the "com also told them they were the concept of freedom as something com munist" (dictatorial) regime is no longer in free and their toil was for pletely different from what it means to the effect. So why are there war veterans march the common good. rest of the world. ing down the streets of Moscow with por Meanwhile this out How do we know we are .free? Well, who trait~ of Stalin in their hands? Freedom and side power. or the clus would put us in front of a firing squad for democracy, as we find out, are not so easily ter of revolutionaries, critici-:;ing rhe government? accepted. but must be taught and conditioned. gained more and more Of course, there are select individuals who much like walking on one's own two feet direct control over the are taking advantage of the ne\" political and must be taught to an infant who has learned newly born Soviet economic opport1.mities offered to them, but that the only way to transport himself is on Union and became an overwhelming amount of people are still the arms of his mother. drunk with the power. waiting for a paycheck from the government, Russian history clearly shows that the Every aspect of life was a government that is now the puppet of the country's various governmental systems have controlled by the mighty seemingly omnipotent Russian mafia. never been very conducive to freedom of stale: all religious So now what? Do we keep on trying to anything for the people. Feudalism, while every detail of life. Even though they were thought was strictly prohibited and children promote democracy, gritting out teeth at the confined to the Middle Ages throughout the oppressed to the point of overthrowing the were schooled with a portrait of Lenin in the resurging communist marches? Yes. Unfor rest of Europe, raged on until 186 1 in Rus monarchy, they played right into the hands front of each classroom. All thought had to tunately, we cannot reverse centuries upon sia. Even then, after it'> official abolition, it of the select few oligarchic rulers that be communism, or rather the oligarchy that centuries worth of brainwashing with a few prevailed in the vast rural areas all the way emerged after 1917. brainwashed its subjects to the fu llest. Big years' worth of attempts to open people's until the communist revolution. Only a small Communism, of course, is a wonderful Brother, in reality. was watching, so the eyes. America itself did not simply stumble percentage of the population lived in cities. idea. much like dragons and the tooth fairy. people had no objections to the massive fat into democracy, but had to condition it in the and the Czars had an absolute monarchy that But in actuality, any attempt to set up a fairy cat system's absorption of over 90% of the minds of its citizens for quite a long time. held the people on a very short leash. As in tale existence in a humongous nation is bound average worker's income. Hang on. Mother Russia, the next century will a1 Lsuch governments, after centuries and cen for failure. Russia overthrew the Czars, only In fu ll objectivity, though. the workers' be a long one. turies of absolute power, the people Lost all to allow an even worse dictatorship. The lifesty les were heaven compared to what they conception of what life could be like with people knew not what freedom was, so quite were at any previous point in Russian his Anna Kaplan is a freshman and is originally out a ma-;ter. the feudal lord that controlled understandably they took for gold whatever tory. They were provided with jobs and hous- from the fanner Soviet Union. Stop and Smell the Flowers - Or the Cabbage
Katy Schuman Students tend not to have the time to con the world. Bringing a twist-tie to your Phys centrate on growing as people. We arc so busy ics class may even help you to understand having our minds worked on. that our hearts the lecture better. Whatever you do. put your r' c been concerned recently about the and spirits sometimes suffer. Think of those soul into it. mosquito-buzzing-around-in-the-dark stale nice warm days when you happen to notice The next time you have a spare 15 mm of the common student. the sun shining overhead as you sprint lO utes. try not to flip on the TV. Go outside and Look around. Everybody is rushing from clao;s. Doesn't it make your heart sing for an study the wind blowing through the grass. class to class. club mecung to club meeting, mstant? Doesn., It make that exam you stayed Take some paper with you and write about having no time to sit around and think about up all night to study for somehow seem less \\hat )OU see. his or her life. Take me for instance. I've been important? I didn't make this stulT up. r m reading this intending to write an opinion article ever It's that "slop and smell the flowers" kind great booil. called poemc ra:y by Susan Gold since I got on campus, but I have been too of philosophy that I'm trying to get ncro~s. smith Wooldridge. It's basically about writ busy running around like a chicken with my Sometime thb week. on your way to class or ing poem~. but the freeing nature of the head cut off ever to get around to doing it. to the Pub to get a cheescsteak. stop and check author's advice makes the reader's life seem Finally. here I am. out something around you that strikes your more open and adventurous. She tells you to Thmk ahout your day. How many times fancy. r know that this campus is difficult for communicate v. ith opposing parts of your do you come to stand still and take in the nature-lovers. and if you don't know \\hat I ~clf. to think back to \\here you came from. y 0 Ll world around you·' Admit it-the best think mean. go up that hill behind the library and to pull words out of your head without wor feel you are a ing you do is \\hile you're m class ruminat you'll sec a couple of lonely little Morning rying about what tht:y mean. student-athlete-brother- ing on something that the teacher isn't talk Glories trapped hehind a construclion fence. Doing this kind of thing long enough son-wri ter-arti!.t-rortuneteller-boyfriend ing about. Other than that, the day is filled This b no St Mnry·s. believe me. makes you feel like more of a human being. clanccr-friend-singer-scientist. You will fi with exams. readings. sports practices. club But find something to look at anyway - nally sec yourself a~ a complete person with meetings. Jabs and of course poring over ev those Morning Glories. for mstance. fight many different aspects. ery inch of The Retriever Weekly. ing to survi vc despite the relentless construc You've been so busy being a Try this kind of thing sometime. Usc your Do you ever wonder why you academically tion around us. Or maybe it's a stray feather. student, a lacrosse player and minimal free time to strengthen your spirit. and spiritually crash sometime in Octohcr? or a red-and-gold leaf, 01 one ot those caL' Think ahout yoursell. \\hat do )OU '"a111 to It makes sense if you thin I\ ahout it. It ·s he that Jove my apartment up in Wcsthill so a memberofthe BSU, that you he \\hen you grow up! Where do you \HIIll cause you'\C forgotten to much. haven't had the time to think to li\ t.:'! \\hat do you want to do to make the pay altention to •'thcr as r.ta}he it's c.\ en n wurld a beLtcr place'! \\'ntc about It And get pect~ of )Ourself. You· vc hotllc cap. or a n)cr or a about being a daughter, a Susan Gold~mllh \\ooldridgc·~ poemcra:;\'. hccn so bus) betng a stu s.:rccnsaver But once you pagan and a poet - or It '11 make ) ou look at thmgs I\\ tee includ dent. a lacro~sc pl.1ya find thi:. ohjcct. put all of whatever you are." ing those stubborn. little l\.toming Gloncs. and a member of the yolll soul IIIlO conll::mplat \\atch the \\Orld around you \nd \\atc.:h BSU. that you haven't mg 11 . .Studying a penn) the \\ orld in.,idc ) utu sell ll holds the b1g had the time to think can tell )OU something As \\ooldriJgc o;ay~ m ha hook, cmhradng gcst ..,urpnscs ot .til. about bcmg a daughter. a ahout your:->d I. Luokmg the parts nt ) ou thdl you try to ignore makes pag,lfl ·and a poet or through a Fruitopia bollll! ) ou lcclmoi c \\hole. Think about hov. you'll Kat\ .\chtmum 1' tl iuninr and i ~ lllllJOring II/ whatever YI>U an:. can change your 'ie" on feel v. hen, in~tead of ~imp!) being a sllldcnt. En r:li.\h. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION October 20, 1998 PAGE? Are Shaving Rituals Social Branding or Personal Choice?
ished perceived attractiveness or social shun "armpit gorilla." This hair is quite unsightly feel incredibly sensitive. Wearing pants is a GabeMarcus ning of the affected person. on both men and women. Even though it is very interesting experience, especially if the I asked several UMBC students for their unsightly, social rebuke is very seldom di fabric is rough. After the skin becomes de Shaving is a ritual most engage in every views on the topic of shaving. Some ap rected at men, since society demands only sensitized, having clean shaven legs becomes day. Most males at UMBC shave facial hatr plauded the suggestion that men shave un women sha\ OU OTES ftoD2 /£e QUAD What is your prophecy for the New Millenium? photos by Amy Ba nowetz Bo, 21 IMDA "More rock, less talk." Lenor Robinson. 19 Computer Engineering "Computers are going to take over the worldll" Brooke Summers. 17 Theatre "As my good friend Mike Williams, I 8 Chns says, the only Computer Science suNivors of the "Nothing 1s going apocalypse will be to change." tw1nkies and cockroaches." PAub 8 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION October 20, 1998 Everything You've Always Wanted To Know About Sex-Ed ..------~But Were Afraid To Ask. Jessica Rothfus identity i~ lonned. and relationships are typi cally stnhh!, hut that doesn't change the fact One of the reasons that public schools are thnt "c remain committed to pleasing a part failing to prepare children adequately for life ner. hoth physically and emotionally. out-.idc their\\ ails is the lack of support from So. the point is that we tend to put indi parents. In addition, sigmftcant portions of ' iduals 10 categories- children, teenager~. parent don 'I sulllcicntly discipline their chil adults. There's no question that there arc dif dren or provide social support and informa ferences between the categoric:-.- in matu tion. Thus. teachers arc left to deal with things rity. knowledge and impressionability-and that parents either can't or won't take upon that adults generally make better decisions themselves. Thb focus takes time from what accept responsibility in \\ ays that children teachers should he doing teaching aca and teens can't. However. ,.,_hen we catego demic rather than social skills. Ho\\cver. ruc in such a" ay. we forget the fact that e\ there arc times when this focus on social cryone is human. In many cases. adults and teaching is necessary. teenagers arc motivated by the same things. A controversial issue in this matter is sex The response may be different. but the influ education. Due to the fact that parents aren't impressionable than children. but their capac ences are typically the same. dealing with this issue successfully, I believe ity for destruction is greater, as is their con If people are approached as human beings. that schools have a responsibility to educate nection to many more forms of media. rather than just "obnoxious teenagers," they children about STDs, pregnancy and the look. Peer pressure is certainly more prevalent would be more receptive to greater amounts Too many people believe lhat if sex is dis ing fault with television. radio and movies. in the teen years, but that too always exists. of learning. Often what we expect from cussed with a (pre)teen, that person wilJ au We give too much power to these things when People sometimes judge their value in rela people is what we get. tomatically want to go out and experiment. we assume that they cause social decay. As a tion to others. and the whole of American Therefore, sex education should be an im The simple truth (whether anyone likes it or whole, American society is desensitized, society is based on competition. Competition portant part of public school education. Teen not) is that teenagers arc choosing to or be partly due to popular television and movies. isn't negative, but it is a stimulus to peer pres agers can handle the true facts, meaning those ing forced (by a sex-obsessed media, peers, However, popular media affects everyone, sure. You look around at more successful unclouded by religious tinkering or conser partner) to have sex at increasingly younger not just children. people, see what they have, what they're do vative brainwashing. When we approach stu ages. Many people are so concerned with pro ing, and then try to keep up. It may not be dents on a human level with necessary social I think this component alone needs further tecting children from the powerful influence about drugs or sex. but the pressure is still information, they are much more able to suc examination. American society is always of television and movies thatlhey forget their there. ceed in academics. looking for a scapegoat. We want to find own weaknesses. Crimes may be less shock Even as adults, we are wrapped up in rela something (anything) on which to blame our ing when committed by adults, but arc they tionships, and we are very concerned wilh Jessica Rorhfus is the assistant opinion edi social problems. Typically, we end up find- really any less disturbing'? Adults may be less what our partners want. By adulthood, an tor ofThc Retriever Weekly. fHOUSAND WOPO APf by Dave Chen THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY OPINION October 20, 1998 PAGE9 from U:.TI'ERS. page 6 and she was a slave. Books arc included in I smoke and I am in no way stupid, nor am I don't you try using one of the entrance.:-. by playing with the American image of the American Girls program and there are all a bastard. And as for the uncontrollable body \\ here the smokers don't congregate'! That beauty, suc.:eclos and st} lc!. I have ollcn l>Orts oflx)()ks ai:H.lUt slave dishes. Reconstruc lxlor comment. did you ewr think that maybe way we won't offend you the same way you watched her play~ ith black dulls and white tion. and the like. My s1ster did not want to we nught hght up a dgareue so we don't have have offended us, the smokers of UMBC. dolls. One of these dolls is usually Barbie. I purchase Adie; she \\anted one of the white to mclltho e with uncontrollable body odor? I, as~ ith all the rest "ho chose to do so. \\onder ho\\ she\ icws hcrselfm relat10nto dolls. I clearly remember asking my sister I need not assume, because 1 "know that you smoke and like it. It is my right to <.moke Barb1c? Docs she "ant to look like Barb1e? "\\hy?" She rephed, .. I Y.ant her because 1 have personally offended many people. 1l11s just a .. it is )Our right to" hinc about those All of my anS\\Crs to these quesuons were like her. She pl.tys soccer and I like sports." population not only includes students "ho of us "ho chose to smoke. But serious I) assumpllons. though there ~ a'i an mc1dent The fact that my SISter did not want a doll smoke. but also the facuh) and stalf of back off and let people make their O\\ n de that drc\\ m) ~lltention to what my s1ster that !.poke of her history and actually looked UMBC \~ho chose to do so. It must beater cisions. Jf you thmk your rude comments \\anted out of a doll. like her (except for the hair) does say a lot to rible burden to be so perfect in such an im are going to change anything. you're wrong. I can agree with the article us it stated that me. It means when I was seven and won a perfect world. What might change is that you just might "girls .1re presented with a false sense of re Cabbage Patch doll on a TV show called People have been smoking for centuries find more smelly, hazardous. offensive ality.'' Yes, that is true, because we are all "Wow," I was different. I wanted the only and the consequences arc well known to all ·smoke being blown your way. not the same shapes and we don't all have black doll on the show. Why? I wanted a son, of us who smoke. How could we not know'! As for the smoking population ofUMBC: the same long hair. Even my sister's black and my son was going to be black. People hke you are jamming it down our don't let the Gabes of the world get you dolls had the unrealistic long. straight black throats continuously. Ifl remember correctly. down. You, just like I. have the right to hair that ran down their back!'i. Is this what Brian Pluim this is a free country where each individual smoke. Let the University officials. \\ho we teach our young what beauty 1s? OK, so has freedom of choice. My choice. as with ever they may be, kno" hoY. you feel about what happens when our young don't have millions of others. is to smoke. ac; such, I re a smoking ban. With so many entrances to hrur down the1r backs and are not so skinny? Editor: sent the constant whining and badgering of each building. there is no reason why some I don't think my sister wanto; to look like Thank you Gabe Marcus for boring the non-smokers. SO GET OVER IT, GABE! cannot be designated to the smokers. Barbie, but I do think she believes that is UMBC population with your self-righteous. There is nothing worse than some sclf-righ One final note, I don't think that all losses what beauty is. My sister is part of a doll pompous opinion and the ''hazards of smok tecms individual, majoring in some form of can be blamed on those athletes who choose company called American Girls. She col ing"lecture (October 13). the health arena, and whining that the ciga to smoke. What about the guy who gets lects dolls and their clothes. She had the op I agree that the cigarette butts thrown care rcne smoke offends him and will cause him stone drunk the mght before the game? Bet tion of four g1rh. One girl was white from lessly around the c.tmpus are disgusting and phys1eal distress. Have you ever analy:r.ed the that hango\ er docs ~ ondcrs for his perfor the Victorian period. Two more \\Cre Y.hitc those v. ho throw them should ha\'c to spend a1r we breathe on a regular bas1s? It is full of mance. and \\ere from other penods m Amcncan some time cleanmg them up. But. I resent harmful toxins. Lnst ume I look<.-d, there were history. The black doll \\as named Addie. you refemng to smokers as ..stupid ba.,tards ·· atlcasttY. o entrancco; to every bmldmg. Why P.S. Introducing NEW Microsoft Contract 98-? ~n>dy •Sacrifice~ personal choice for a lower bottom line • Helps to fuel a corporation which is on trial for anti trust infringement •Spends MD State tax dollars on computer software to be used privately. The fine print: of course there's no ACTUAL MS Contract 98-? It's a joke, silly. Tbl! oplniun' cxpl\..,.'\1!11 bcn:ia rcpn:~cnt the pcnooul optD!OU of Carl Gehrman, Parody and do not nccc.~~arlly ren~llhe opinion~ ol Tht Rl'lrii'J:U Wl't'kl)'. UM RC, or 111y otht!r enJily. "Microsoft", the Microsoft logo, and the "Academic Price" marking are either trademarks or registered trademarks of Microsoft. PAGE 10 Oct. 20, 1998 FEATURES Diversity, Acceptance, and Twister [insert name here] Annual Freedom Alliance "Coming Out Dance" Rocks the Night Away nother week, another cool coupla kids entering my contest BROOKE SUMMERS ing the dance, the ThaL, my friends, is kick-ass. Last week we asked you to come Retrieva ni·ekl\' StajJIVrita nostalgia for that glo up with Top Five Lists. for or agamst something. Thanks to the rious decade pac;t wac; entrants! Here are the runners-up: A It was a night to re overwhelming: ah, member as the Freedom the music of Cyndi Top Five Reasons Why South Park Kicks Ass: Laupcr and Boy 5. You hear v. orks like "kick ass'' Alliance held its annual George. tons of big -t They talk about real life problems (Canman doesn't go swimming; the Coming Out Dance at first graders piss in the pool) the Retriever Grill last hair and. of course. 3. Educational messages (in nasal voice. "Drugs arc Bad, K") Friday. The evening was Twister! 2. Romance (in one such love scene. Wendy exclaims, "Stan puke is gross") ftlled with great people The '80s nair I. Boy, is Chef hot!!! and endless excitement wa'> only half the rea- (Submined by Brandi MallinR/.v) as fabulous 1980s music son to attend this an- poured out onto the nual bash. The care- Top Five Reasons to Like the Internet: dance tloor. and those free, warm environ- 5. E-mail . ful d f bl ment welcomed all hi ISS ays O ue eye Jason Putschc I Retriever Weekly Starr 4. Research shadow and '80s pop Coming Out: Ttie Freedom Alliance celebrates our who attended to ex- 3. Porn - . press themselves to were reborn · Those· at common bond as a generation born of the '80s culture. 2. MP3s tending scoured their the utmost extent. I. More porn closets to revive those well-forgot- bright scrunchtes and New Kids On providing a release from some of (Submitted by John Hemon) ten spandex pants: cut-off. hot pink the Block tapes to bring back those the social tensions often cncoun Top Five Reasons to Like Lecture Classes: sweat shirts: chunky black belts; wonderful ·80s nights. Upon enter- tered when dealing with the subject 5. Sleep 4. Sleep J. Sleep .. 2. "Zzzzzuzzz" I . Sa' ing the World from Vampire Balloons ( SulmHtted l1y John /Ieaton) Top Fhe Rt!asons to Dislike the Dining Hall: 5. Pizza 4 Shepherd·~ Pie 3. Burger~ And the winner of the Seasonal Decoration from the Dollar Store Near My Apartment: Top I< he Jnfomercial\: 'i. Slam Man 4. Vacuu m Sealer 3. P\}Chic Connection 2. Curves (removable brea~ts ) I. Fat Absord (Emrv submitted by John /Ieaton) David Slak I Retriever Weekly Staff WMBC personality Betty Jean Bell takes the airwaves by storm. Now, see. the way lhis week happened. both the mnners-up prizes and Don't Touch That Dial: the winning entry prizes are seasonal decorations from the dollar store near my apartment The winner just gets a larger quantity of crap, this week. The quality is. as always, substandard. Thanks for entering, kids! You may NEWSRADIO: CAMPUS RADIO claim your prizes in UC 214 after Tuesday. Also, if John Heaton cares to expand on this: what is the Fat Absord? I rarely sleep, opting instead to watch television through the night, and I have yet to see this product. But! admire your sick fascination with paid programming, my friend. STATION UPGRADES BRING NEW This week's contest is to come up with your very own holiday. If any of you have been reading the paper for more than a week, you may remember that our regular feature, "Quotes from the Quad." once used this as a sur NAME, NEW TALENT AND ANTENNA vey question. Well, because I can, I stole it. Who's gonna stop me? For the love of Pete, I put a photo of my cat in the paper last week! If that's not flagrant abuse of power, I don't know what is. CHRISTINA SABATO head Music Director and Label Li WMBC's own 22-fool AM So come up with your own holiday. The card companies did it; you can, TOKUNBO SAVAGE aison for WMBC. broadcast tower, a new highlight to too. My friend Aal not only created his own holiday, he declared himself Retriever Weekly Staff WMBC, the station formerly the station, is one of these new mler of an island that may or may not exist. We live with a very loose grip known as WUMD, continues to changes. The organization was able on reality. my friends and I do. Recent improvements at WMBC, evolve through new equipment, a to acquire this new addition with the Let us know what the name of the holiday is, what it will celebrate, what the renamed radio station on cam new name and new faces, or in this help of the Student Projects Fund rituals are performed and most importantly, the date on whlch it occurs. pus. have made listening to the wide case, voices. through the SGA. The station is full You may also wish to include the logistics of it, such as whether or not it's variety of new talent on the air more What prompted a new nan1e for of people who not only have broad a federal holiday, any symbols or mascots observed and whether or not accessible for the UMBC commu the station? Well, for one, there was musical tastes but also a broad and presentS are exchanged. nity. a college radio station with the skilled engineering background. The winner of this week's contest will receive a giant plastic pumpkin "We would hope that people name already (WUMD) in Univer Led by Chief Engineer Rob Carlson door decoration. Won't you just be the envy of all the kids on the floor. would actually take the time out to sity of Michigan Dearborn, which and Broadcast Engineer Gabe Runners-up will also receive something from lhe Dollar Store Near My Apartment, listen, and respect our programming caused a great deal of confusion. Marcus. they were able to construct, something considerably smaller, but no doubt equally as tacky. I still have no clue what as unique for this area, as far as With the new changes and additions raise and adjust the tower for better I'm to be for Halloween. Nobody is helping. cilher. Considering r m lhc one who wrote something that can be heard from to the station, the name better rep reception of the station. The tower lhe Costume Suggestion Guide for last year's Halloween issue. it's very sad that I'm at commercial stations in Baltimore such a loss. "Why are you dressed like it's Halloween? You look so absurd, you look so resents UMBC. and also "rolls off obl>Cene." and D.C.," says Drew Thiemann, the tongue," says Thiemann. see RADIO STATION, page 12 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 PAGE 11 Sexes Square Off Over How to Dump Dating Manual SHE SAID I ELAINE R. ELGAMIL fax machine. That is. if yer too yell a· to tell once it is all over w1th him. the book ad girl to dump a guy. such as simply not re o, you \\.ant to shave that unwanted him up close and personal. dresses issues on ho\\. to deal with the situa turning phone calls or becoming incredibly stubble. c.ut off that dead weight. rid For those brave souls who want to tell him tion yourself. There arc words of wisdom on repulsive to make the guy break up" ith her, yourself of that lichenous leech- in person, don't ignore advice on pre-parting "sex with the ex" and deciding on divvying although the authors of the book caution this Sthe boyfncnd who must be dumped. planning, such as where to ditch and what to up property and relationships. Living after may decrease the social reputation of the For us women. dumping is not as easy as day wear. The book suggests that going ''all out" \\.atds may be the hardest part of all, espe dumper. Another favorite of the author.. is the time soaps make them out to be. '-lor should for this momentous occasion may not be cially if you want that hunk back. long-distance ditch. They weigh the pros and it be as complicated. Planning for "the big ideal. Looking for either a discreet res But have no fear; these women kno\\. who cons of various methods of communication day·· (no. not your wedding with this loser) taurant or a relaxing place in the they're dealing \\.ith -- women \\.ho can't such a-; phone conversations. mail. voice mai I should be of great importance if you want to park may be better than make up their minds. They can help you get or fax. Each method has its pitfalls and areas do it right. spending the night him back without you having to scrape your that require careful planning to be success Fear the fateful hour no more, ladies! Two watching him cry knees on the floor while you beg for for fully executed. really funny \\.Omen have put together (A in a rental tux giveness. Most of the book can be used from a mule Coward's Manual) Holl' to Dump a Guy for o v e r While the book does generalize, perspective. since apparently human nature other women who arc battling the age-old generalizations arc not necessarily docs not change much across the gender gap. problem of ho\\. to get out of a wrong rela bad \\.hen you· ve got a problem and The pathetic one-liners are lame enough to tionship. This book atLempts to help its read individualizing it means $50 for be used by both cowardly sexes. Men should ers to evaluate how ditchable their dumpce each visit at the therapist's of definitely read U1is book, to learn all the ma to-be really is. Once you've gotten through fice. The book is a pretty good nipulative ways to break up with someone the initial chapter. "How to Know When to read, even if you plan on \\.hilc making that person think it is her own Go." you can move on to ''Getting in Touch standing by your man. But fault! Men are at a disadvantage in this re with Your Inner Coward" and "The Ki nder. there's always the spect. Gemler Ditch." Little self-quizzes get the Bet chance ... Girly teen magazmcs have tons of stuff reader to thinking if venturing into dumping terthan about breaking up with guys (not that I'd ground is a safe idea. that, the HE SAID I know), and even magazines targeted for col Fortunately, the authors include a very ac book gives CiAsE lege-age women (and beyond) have advice curate chapter that defines most ready-to-be a list of MARcus for getting rid of the annoying boyfriend (not dumped men into ten personality categories. "what to say" I read How to that I read or take the quiaes within such There's Or Moneybags. the rich man who and "how to re Dump a magazines) or manipulating him. If men have loves to spend money on you and own you spond if this hap Guy. and such a magazine or resource, it is definitely at the same time. and the Lovable Weirdo, pens." Don't fall fou nd it not as widespread. who appears quite cute at ftrst. but eventu victim to the well-re hilari Since men do not have as many dating re ally truly fit<; the authors' description-- "Fa hearsed lines of "But 1 ous. sources to caU their own. they should deli vorite possession: ll1s pet iguana." Maybe thought you loved me:· The nitel)' read some of the lighter. less mushy you are dating the creepy Cling-On or the or "I'II change." And if you schemes books or magazines on the subject to discover Reject Addict. All of these men can be diffi must. tell him that you're for what "the other side" is up to. Without read cult dumps. If you arc really sick of him (you confused about your sexuality women, ing the book. men might misunderstand\\. hat know what you call him to your friends), then or cop out with "I have this outlined in the women are saying. Men tend to take state categorizing hh. faults will be none too difli friend who gives blow jobs-- isn't book, are exactly the ments at face value and not look for the tn cult to do. that disgustmg! ?" You won't hear ones I have used personally ncr meanings of things or the angle they're So if the author.. have led you to believe from him ever again. I must say that and have had used on me. The taking. Men definitely need to look at the that it is time to rid your life of the biggest lying may not be what most women will section describing the various types of possible deeper meaning of many comments roach of all. folio\\. through with their ad\ 1ce want to do when they are initiating a men amused me. To me. the same types of women seemingly make idly. or more i mpor and make it really cmi. Though the authors break-up, but he's gotta go anyway! women exist, described exactly the same tantly their propagandistfriends make idly. do put a funny twist to their manual, most of The book appears slightly manipulative on ways. Guys might also have dated a Cling According to this book, for tbe cowardly the advice i:i quite reasonable. They gi vc ex the part of women. but the fact is that some on. a person who immediately hits-it-off hearted lily-livered yellow-bellied duplici cellent tips on teaming how to avoid drag women arc too scared to participate actively with you, only to become incredibly tous conniving woman, it is often easier to ging out the situation. Breaking up is hard to in their relationships. Other women. however. irritating within a matter of days or perhaps enlist the help of a willing conspirator. do. but easing certain factors may help. Per are not nC\\ to the methods of lying and cheat as long as a week. Another favorite is the I am definitely not speaking against being haps the best chapter was "Mail Order Ditch ing. Hence, the chapter "OK. OK, I Slept Reject Addict, a very tempting specimen conniving or cowardly or instrumenting a ing and Other Processes of Elimination." 11 With Your Brother ... But Can't We Still Be who will so infatuate you that you dump campaign of propaganda; I am merely not gives tips on modem day separation meth Friends?" your current ning and go with her instead, ing that most men seen to be disadvantageous ods that utiliLc the most common communi This section offers words of wisdom in only to have her break. up with you upon in th1s area. For this reason,! recommend men cation tools -- delivery mail, telephone. tearing his heart out. but letting him still be hearing the supposedly good news. read this enure book, not simply the lame one voicemail. e-mail and ycssiree. Bob, even the with you sans "bedroom privileges... And The next chapter suggests methods for a page appendix in the back labeled "For Men." Take Advantage of S"\Veet University Life Dr. F ischetti and Frie nds Focus o n Fellini,s P ost- War Films RYAN SURBER "La Dolce Vita," in which Fclli111 featured ev as the different members described their rela time due to the double reed and lo\\. frequency Rell ielw Wn•.kil' SwJJ' Writt>r erything from a nying Jesus to full -nedged tionships with £heir instruments. However, the of the instrument which cau!>es disturbing vi orgies. This film was the source of ~orne con film was not entirely without meaning. for the bration-; in the brain. One of the distinct privileges of being a 'tu travers) in its da) due to tumuhuou' themes, orche.,tra, which was unionized. rose up When so many students claim to be in col dent at illvffiC i' the opportunity tO SJI in on such as "God is Dead, .. which lead the Vatican again ... t the somewhat fa,ci't conductor. But lege for the pursuit ol higher knowledge. then almost any of the classes at the university. to ban the film for a time. "La Dolce Vita" once the) had rid themselves of his so-called one mu<,t question the intentions of a student Whether you arc an engineering major who continues to pia) to some discord for its abuse weak leaden.. hip, they replaced him with a gi who simp!) takes notes. d<><.!ll the reading and adores music, an English major with a knack of women 111 the lilm. and an interesting dis antmctronome and the scene tumed to chaos. returns home with a good grade. These arc for physics or a scicntbt fascinated by the cussion ensued as to the intentions of the di The orchestra soon realit.cd that they needed the people who have come to school to be world of art, you can explore your alter ego rector. some direction and so a more Hitler-like con placed into high-paying JObs. and have thus without the fear of pcr,ccution of your peer\, The class then viewed Fellini's intensely ductor returned to lead them once again. misinterpreted the goal of our inlltitution. To or worse. failure. political lilm "Orchestra Rehear~al." which There are some that rna)' question the san attend a class out of sheer interest is to sub My own secret pa~~ions are film and, like was made for television in 1978 during a high ity or a ... tudent who is willing to sit through scribe to the ba,ic principles of a liberal arts those of many other American Studie~ majors. time of political turmoil in Ita!) The film had two-and -a-half hour.; of a cla\s for wh1ch he education. the pursuit of random cocktail-party conver a slapstick comedy feel to it at limes, as mem is not receiving credit. However. there is an And so I implore you to take advantage of sational knowledge. I fueled this inner lire by bers of the orche:-.tra quibbled over the place infinite amount of knowledge to be taken from these opportunities and the wealth of fantas sittmg in on Dr. fobchcni's "Post-War West ment of their chair... :-.lapped one another across U1c plethora of courses one can never fit into tic minds that surround you daily, for you may em European Film" class. which conccntnlle~ the face. and ate doughnuts while making love a four- or even six-year plan at UMBC. I ne,er again have the chance to learn from the entirely on the work of Italian filmmaker under a piano. Fellini also included. as in many learned of the state of Italy in the late 1970s. dh erse and fantastic community that is Fredrico Fellini. The class discussed the film of his other films. blatantly sexual overtones and that oboe players go insane over a long UMBC. PAGE 12 THE RETRIE VER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 WMBC Makes New Waves r------~ from RADIO STATION, page IO it's not hippie indie stuff," he ventures. "It's THE SURVIVAL SKILLET aggressive, but not overpowering.'' ~ stands atop the Biological Sciences Building, The on-air personalities at WMBC are a and gives students the opportunity to listen diverse and eclectic bunch. "It's a commu BY ADAM CRAIGMILES to all assortments of music, including jazz, nity, a good mix," says Mike Riley, the world music. new age. hip-hop, alternative station's assistant general manager and loud Most of us here in college are of the age 0 Pasta of your choice rock, classic rock and talk radio. rock music director. Half of the DJs are re at which we acquire long-tenn relationships. 0 I package (8oz) of fresh basil leaves Along with these new additions comes new turning veterans and the others are new re This is the point at which a couple is fan1il- 0 J tablespoon of oil broadcasting and studio equipment and an cruits to the station. iar enough to know all the odds and ins of 0 I clove of garlic entirely renovated DJ booth, which has with Betty Bell, whose show with Dave Bell each other-- their quirks. pet peeves, bizarre 0 A sprinkling of Parmesan cheese a new fader. mixer board. new record player, runs from 3 p.m. to 4 p.m. on Fridays, is one habits, etc. If you don't know if your rela- For this recipe, you'll need a food pro- a I I 0-CD player and computers. Towards the of these fresh new faces. Playing old avant tionship has reached this point. ask yourself cessor. If you don't have one, I highly rec back of the building. there's a new recording garde style jazz, ''Beuy B .." a transfer stu this: Can you burp in front of your beloved ommend buying one. For only 16 bucks at studio complete wiU1 two ADATs, which are dent majoring in Voice Performance (Opera) and not feel ashamed? If you can, you· re your local Giant you can have your very own digital recording media systems, and a 24- is becoming acclimated to the setting of long tem1. Now, what usually accompanil!s "Magic Mim:er." This is probably one of the this point in a relationship is a complete de- easiest pasta dishes there is to make (actu track player. WMBC. cline in romance. It':, almost like. well, like ally, a close second to spaghetti in a can). The station's website is another area of "It's really fun, you meet a lot of people. you're married. Most people feel that ro- Start boiling your pasta from the get-go. growth. Mark Robinson. WMBC's find a lot of music, Jearn a Jot about music mance is only to convince the other person The type of pasta is completely up to you. wcbmaster. is constantly updating and bring and the equipment that goes along with it," to go out with you. and after that, what's the But if) ou'rc planning to do that "Lady and ing all of the information online to Bell says. There are over I00 people involved point? Well, you have the rest of your life Ill the Tramp" thing \\ ith your no(ld)es, stay www.wmbc.umbc.edu. ''IL's a crucial part of in WMBC, another spurt in growth. have dull rclatiomhips. You might as well away from the fcttu~cini. It's very hard to our communication with DJs and listeners," Brock Posner-Smuck and Linda spkcthingsupabitwhikyou'restillacarc- get enough suction on ~uch a heavy pasta. says Robinson. who also serves as the Barkenbush's "The Avengers' Hour" boasts free college student. As for the pc.'>to, open your food processor. station's RPM music director. a '60s spy format. with ''non-hippie '50s and My ad\ icc is to do $Omething simple cv- throw in all the ingredients and bknd until On the page. one can find a current sched '60s music for adults.'' says Posner-Smuck. ery now and then to resuscitate your rela- pasty (tough. ch?). Remember to wash and ule of all the shows that broadcast from "It's hi-fi antics for cool cats and kittens." tionship. Fo1 instance, invite your signifi- remove some of the longer sterns from the WMBC, an updated news and information Tunc in to their show to hear Frank Sinatra. cant other over one night for dinner and ba!'.illeavcs. Also. it sometimes helps when page of the meetings and planned events, the Dean Martin. Mel Torme, aud "everything make pes to. Pcslo. my second wooing pru.ta peeling garlic to smack the clove\\ ith a hard, station's constitution. staff information and from cha-cha to polka." dish. tastes wonderful and couldn't be :sim- flat surface o.e.the nat side of a large knife, of coun;e. the Real Audio player that enables Dan Kelley, who hosts "My Two Hours of pier to make, but must only be made by or an economtcs textbook). anyone with Internet access to listen to Fame," from 12 p.m. to 2 p.m. on Thursdays, :someone in a long-term relationship. Remember that the more you handle it. WMBC - listeners as far as Arizona have favors a more interactive format. He plays Now, if you're wondering why this is off the more garlic oil your skin absorbs. You tuned in. "cool punk, metal and ska --accept no sub limits to the beginning dater:.. I'll tell you: may ha\e stinky fingers for a week, but re WMBC will now be broadcast in the pub stitutions." and alternates the music with con garlic and basil. I imagine everyone knoW!> member this is all in the name of love. Now and other dining areas on campus. Listeners tests and stunts involving those in the UC why garlic is taboo. This is not a force to be that you have your pesto and your pasta, mix can also tune in while in the dormitories, al Plaza or Lobby. with pizzas. CDs. t-shirts or reckoned with on a first date. It stink1o, and them. The pes to should stick naturally to the though interference in the typical donn rooms Kelley himself as prizes. The ongoing ''Win everyone who cats it 5tinks. But to tell you pa~ta and will look rather elegant. I recom (fluorescent light. computers. TV, thick walls, a Date With Dan" contest should prove to be thc truth. it's onl! of the be:st cooking re- mend topping this with some of your favor etc.) may hamper reception. popular. sources there is. You just have to sacrifice ite sauteed vegetable:. and ~prinkling a little "Our genre is free-form radio, which means Jeff Conlin, Jenelle D'Aiessandro, and good breatl1 for great taste. more cheese. we don't enforce DJs to play this particular Nathaniel Lew host "Igneous Rock," a show As for basil, the reason may be less obvi- Serve with salad and garlic bread (the music for this amount of time, as some other which, according to Lew, "provides some ous. Basil is generally not dangerous to the damage is done, so eat a<> much garlic as you college radio stations might. lt's basically thing that's Jacking. Of six Christian stations wooer, but in pesto it is. As you will see. want). Afterwards. you can help each other based on people's own individual choices and on my dial, none caters to the teenagers and this recipe requires mincing fresh basil into spot-check teeth and share a garlic kiss or miniscule parts. These little basil bits have two. For next week: cooking with your interests," says Thiemann. "We are trying to young 20s who want to hear heavy Christian special chemical properties and adhere to roommate. change a way for DJs to be less self-indul music with a 4-4 beat." your front teeth. This makes your smile ob- To complain about your date's garlic gent. The philosophy we have in the music Their show was so named because it's "a so-channing. Without further ado. the recipe: breath, write to me at [email protected]. playing arena now is 'Don't play the hits!' .. rock that's on fire," Lew continues. "Music You'll need edu. ··we don't impose," says Robinson." The is neither good nor bad; it's what you do with reason we exist is to introduce people to new it that counts. We're not here to preach; we're ... _____ ~ clip_ and save THE SURVIVAL SKILLET_. --___ .. music. You want your radio show to be an here to cater to that specific community." hour of Swedish yodeling? We won•t stop Any student who would like to be involved you. As long as you stay within reasonable has a chance to do so. The only thing is. "as limits of decency." we become more popular it's been very com WMBC strives to emphasize diversity in pelltive to be able to acquire a good time slot. its programming and to expose student<; to For the hard work put in, you will be re music that is not usually heard on most of warded. Most new people receive an hour; the popular radio stations in the area, like as you gain the experience and unden;tand WHFS and WKYS. "There are already out ing of the station, however. you will rC{;eive lets for that music." says Robinson. "We're more time," explains Thiemann. one of the only free-form college stations Soon. WMBC'<; RealAudio feed will be broadcasting into Baltimore." enhanced to near-FM quality. but the AM sta The station's diversity creates an opportu tion will remain so for a while. "!Because nity for students like Thiemann, who IS an of] the Federal Communication Commission, avid supporter of the local music of the Bal it will be a very long process which requires timore area. to gain some exposure. "We are diligent work which means our staff must fol u·ying really hard to support local bands - low very stnct rules, such as no profanity on current vital bands who are struggling to get the air and things of that nature. But it can all exposure. or [bands] that deserve to be come about through hard work and heard." perseverence," answers Thiemann. Benjamin Valis. host of "Just Me From "Even though we are all from different de Two to Three (Thursdays from 2 p.m. to 3 partments, we all help each other out.'' says p.m.),'' agrees. His show features mostly "up Thiemann. "There are seven directors: we coming music -- bands that are coming talk to record labels, try to bring different tllrough Baltimore, bands that people can go bands on campus and spend a great deal of to see. I tend not to play bands from England time running the station. Each Executive that have split up and disappeared.'' Board member spends at least (if not more) Valis rums to his fellow DJs for assistance 20 hours a week behind the scenes.'' in describing his show. "Hey. what kind of "And we're here to have fun, too," says music do I listen to?" His colleagues help him Robinson. ··we're not paid: we spend so to piece together a fitting description. '·I much time here because we love it so much." would say I play indie rock ... rock-based "I don't talk a lot," he says. "I let the mu music, experimental. not very hard core. but sic speak for itself." THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 PAGE 13 Hours of Operation ED VAUGHN, Man - Fri: 9:00am - 11:00pm Sat: 10:00am-9:00pm TICKETMASTER, AND Sun: 12:00pm - 7:00pm Free billiard seminars with Ed Vaughn every Friday from 4:30pm ENOUGH NACHOS TO to 5:30pm. FEED ASMALL ARMY THE GAMEROOM IS THE CLOSEST THING TO HEAVEN YOU CAN FIND ON CAMPUS . Locker Sale price special valid from • llOWlll 10/14 to progress! 10/30/98 •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• • Lockers for the remainder of the • • • • Fall1998 semester are only $15! • ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Contact CIRC at xl 000 for more information. PAGE14 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 Sweat and Burn WITH MARTIN SHusTER Hello, everybody. Last week \\ e talked Obviously. strength is relative. ing yourself. Generally. it is good to increase dons, and ligaments. Secondly, it is hard about the training split and other things. This neatly leads us into our next point of your functional ~trength, as it makes you on your nervous system. Hov.? Well. lov.. Thh week we will discuss ~ize (alv.ay:; an discussion: the rep ranges. As you may have more compact and efficient and it also lets rep tr.1ining produces little to no increase interesting issue) and the difference be guessed. then: are basically two ways to train: you C\ enluall) put up more ''eight so that in size, but it dol!s produce neurological meen rep range:;. One is to increase your functional strength. you can go onto bigger size gains. adaptation, which basically means that you On the mauer of size: Often I will hear and the other i~ to mcrease your size. For example, let's say you hench-press recruit more motor neurons to accomplish people saying things like. "Wow, that guy Or, in technical terms, you can increase (yes. I tend to usc this exercise a lot as an a given task (ic. move a bar from your i~ !>O big,'' or "Wow, that guy is small. but your neuromuscular ctl'icicncy or you can go example) L35 pounds for I 0 reps. Let us also chest). Remc·mbcr thut the closer you get he sure is strong." through a process or hypertrophy (increase say rhat your one repetition max in the exer to your one rep max. the higher your in Now, this brings up the issue of func in muscle mass). cise is 185 pounds. tensity is! Keep this in mind: tional strength. For instance, let us say we Hypertrophy is generally accomplished If you were to increase your one repetition have two people. One of them weighs 150 through reps above six. That is why many max to 200 pounds. then the poundage you #of reps purpose pound" and the other weigh<. 300 pounds. people love to trd.in in this rep bracket. l mean, could use for 10 reps \\ould increase also! 4-6 increase in strength and in size They each can bench-press 300 pounds. after all, guys love to walk around and show So you would be able to do, for instance. 2-4 most increase in strength, little Obviou:.ly, the 150·pound person is stron off their biceps to unsuspecting 150 pound~ for 10 reps. Yes, low rep train size ger. Why. you ask'? Alter all. the} arc both girls! Generally it is as follows: ing has <1 direct effect on your high rep out 1-3 increase in strength, no si7.e putting up the same amount of weight put, but not neces~arily the other way around. gains WcJJ, the answer is simple; it's called # of reps purpose For example, if you increased through hy functional strength. The 150 HEY EVERYBODY! SORRY FOR THE RERUN, BUT I'M AUTILE SWAMPED THIS WEEK. .. HARD AT 'I()RJ( ON THE HAI.I..OWEEN ISSUE FOR NEXT WEEK, THOIXiH. ENJOY THIS ONE FROM LAST YEAR, SEE YOU SOON! 1ASON [email protected] (COPYRIGHT '98.) MY AU..'LTIMI£ IFIAV«>RI1'£ cdlw~~M~ ~ g\9~~f~~~~~ ~ Ret:riever V\/eek/ is the greatest: publication n t:he entire history of Western Civilization_ Agree with this statement? Discuss It In urnbc org.retrlever. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 PAGE 15 Love and Betrayal, Baltimore Opera Company-Style Or, How to Kill Your Wife and Make It Look Like an Accident 1 'lt\G-KAI CHUANG The Baltimore Opera Company opened their 1998-99 season with a double header of I Pagliacci and Ct~l'llllc'ria Ru~ticcma. These 1wo opcms contain lo\'c and passion, as well as tears and blood. They have drama. comedy. satire and irony. They're worth checking out! The O\Crture to I Pagliacci \\as pretty cool. In the middle of the O\erturc. one of the char actct~. Tonio, appears on stage to deliver a prologue. "Our author has endeavored. rather. to paint for you a slice of life. his maxim be ing that the artist is a man. and he mu't write for men. Truth is his inspiration,"lonio sings. In other \\Ords. don't just leave this opera house and take e\'er) thing on stage for granted: "'hat you see on stage reflects real life - of course. real life a hundred year:. ago. The cro\\d enters the stage cheering for Baltimore Opera Company Canio. the head of a small theatre company. Keep an Eye on Your Woman: The Baltimore Opera Company presents several performances about lost love. The crowd anticipates seeing Canio act and hearing his jokes. When he announces that to sec Canio's theatre production of lively. The singers did a good job. alone: then he was killed by AUio. their show will start at sunset, the cheer grows Pagliaccio, Canio catches Nedda in action One of my favorite parts of this opera. as I've longed to go back to the Baltimore , louder and more joyoll'.: they don't know with Silvio. "lo punish his wife. he simply "ell as Cavalieri a Rusticana. is the inter Opera sin~:c Ia-.t sea~on's Flying Dutchman they'll be witnc.,sing a manslaughter. acts out the Greek tragedy Pagliaccio, a pro mcllo (an interlude), \\ hich is soothing and -I Pagliacci fulfilled my hunger. Thi" op Cnmo invites Tanio, one of Ius fciiO\\ ac jection of the <;,tmc )O\c triangle hetv.ecn serene. It is obvious. ho\\C\Cr. that th1s op era, along \\ith Ct~val/cria Ru1ticana, is tors. lor a drink. but Tonio reject" the in' ita Nedda, Canto. and Salv10. but this time \\ 1th era and Camlleria Rusticana \\ere written something the entire audience enjo)ed. It's lion The 'illnger~ then tease Canio: "Watch a murderous l\\ ist. under the hen\) intluence of George Hizct's \\orth breaking a leg tn go sec at: Ghcna out ... he [Tonio] "'ants to be alone to make This plot;, cheesy, and thts h nothing out Carmen. The symphonic o,tructurc of the Dimitro\ a. who ~.mg Samuaa in Cm aile ria love your Nedda I Canio 's \\ afe ].'' Cnnao rc of the ordmary for an opemtic ~tory line. But music. the imarumentation and the liM: of Rusticana, \\ ould agtce \\ tth me - 'he rcll sponJ~ "'tth a !->Crious waming, "It's better there i' some fabulous stuff under the :;tory bassoon among th..:sc three OJ>er.ts sounded down the steps when she came out to .11.! not to play su~:h games, hclicvc: me,•· lorc line. The drama \\a' dclltlitcly \\orth seeing. almost identical. Perhaps this tS \\ hy it"' as a knowkdge the applau-;e. shndm' tng the death ol Nedda and hct lmer The love ... ccnc ofNedd,t and Silvio was clean little unbearable for me to sit through the !'.eC Call the B,tltimnre Opem Com pan) at410 Aller Canio lcn\e~ for the t,t\Cnl, Ttmao rc and cxdting to watch; no "Tnnd A" for those ond feature, Caml/eria Rusticana. 727-6000 to lind out more about student dt'i \eals has affection for Nedda. la.'>telcss people. The story line of Cal'llflcria Rtmicana 1s counts and other hag savings, or vi'iit thc:u Unbckno\\ nst to everyone. Tonio as not Singing·\\ isc, it was entertaining for vet essentially the same that of I Pa~lwcci . web site lmp://11 ,m.balrimnrenpera.com for Nedda's lo\ cr. Silvio is. Tonio catches them eran opcra-goers and lust-time audaencc Tumdu fellm love with Lola before he be more mfo. an the act. becomes jealous and tells Canio members alike. C'nnio, Tonio, and Nedda came a ~oldier. When he returned from the of the affair. were portmyed hy Greg.:un Grigonan. An to· "'ar, he found Lola wa:- married to another Bet ore the crowd returns from the dturch nio Sah adori, and hlcna Filipova. respcc- man. Allio. Turridu refused to leave her Travels With Anna ... Please Stand by for a Wonderful Journey A."'i"NA KAPLAN there's a wonderful opportunity to meet other sometimes even too flexible. If trying to get Be sure to keep } our stuff in check: Retrrn·u Wed:/\' Stall Wnter backpackers while waiting to come home. home by a certain date, budget several days pickpockcting. especially ofAmericans. is Sometimes, groups of up to 20 stand-bys, for waiting for a flight very widespread (take comfort in the fact This week, now that we're all packed and mostly American backpackers, sit in an air Unless you're planning to spend all your that it is pretty much the only widespread ready to go. we will discuss the essentials port waiting for a night, and playing Uno. time in one city, you will need a rc~il pass to crime). Bus drivers usually know a mini of transportation, from international planes Airport staff regards these as entertaining get from place to place. Trains are the way to mal level of English, and are quite helpful to local buses. The first thing to remember nuisances, laughing at them while offering go in Europe: They run everywhere, from the to lost and confused strangers. Many cit about flying to Europe is that any plane discounts on overpriced airport food in biggest cities to the smallest villages. Buy ies aJso have night buses, which are in ticket that costs over $200 is a rip-off. There hushed voices. ing individual tickets for these is a rather credibly annoying and unreliable: They arc numerous ways to get there in relative Another inexpensive way to fly is courier. costly hassle, while a rail pass allows you to often do not stop in designated places and comfort without denting your budget. No, you do not have to transport deadly get on any train you wish (although for some. seem to enjoy tonuring the late crowd. If "Relative comfort" means you may have chemicals, live animals or bombs like in The especially in France. prior reservations that feeling very pressed, hail a ubiquitous taxi. to spend a night in an airport. but. hey. this Simpsons. The procedure is actually very cost no more than five dollars arc necessary) Fares arc steep. so gather a group. is the stuff of which good stories arc made. simple: You fly coach, carrying "time-sensi without buying an actual ticket. To purchase plane tickets. rail passes, The most common way for a backpacker tive business documents,'' drop them off at a Passes are usually sold by number of days: and other useful items. go to the youth to fly is stand-by. A stand-by ticket requires designated place in the airport and you arc a ten-day pass, for example, will allow you hostel in Baltimore (W. Mulberry Street, you to arrive at the airport as early as pos done. Although courier nights are less costly to take any number of trains within len 24- a few blocks away from the Walters Art sible. put your name on the list for the next than stand-by, there arc some serious draw hour periods (overnight trains count for the Gallery). The staff is very knowledgeable night to wherever you wish to go, then find backs, such as the presence of a time limit on day of arrival). and will help plan your trip. Although the out 20 minutes before the plane leaves your trip: Usually a courier will have to re There are two major rail companies in Eu hostel sells backpacks. it is better to buy whether there is a seat on it you can take. turn within a week or two carrying more rope: Eurail and lnterail. Eurail is generally them in an army surplus !>tore. This b "here the sleeping-in-the-airport bit documents back to the U.S. a better idea. because it is cheaper and has Well. that's all I can tell you. Yes. you comes in: cspe<.:iaJJy during the summer and Meanwhile. with stand-by vouchers, you more extensive routes. but lntcrail. in addi are now expected to gather your life sav holiday seasons, you may have 10 \\ail sev only need to show up at the airport when your tion to the day system. has passes \\hich al ings and go to bum around the world. Earth eral days for a night. money runs out and to get your name on the low you unlimited travel for one month. is a rock in· planet, and it's hard to forget Since flights to the U.S. arc usually more list. There are no set dates for stand-by travel: With several exceptions, European cities even a second of a journey through it. Go heavily booked than those from the U.S .. therefore, your schedule is very flexible, have excellent public transportation systems. explore. Now! PAGE16 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 Descending to the Heart of the Matter HEART OF DARKNESS by Amazing Studios RAY DUBICKI audience, I really must ask what caused the the creepiest of enemies that have appeared Retriever Week/1· Stuff Writer dog to be named Whisky instead of Rum. in a game in quite a long time. The main Available for Sony PlayStation Vodka or Gin. Oh. well. to each their alco beasts that you face are called Spectres. and Look 5 A long, long time ago. on a platform far. holic preferences. are really nothing more than shadows with far inferior to the ones on the market today, r Andy squares off against a b1g baddy glowing red eyes. But when they start ram Feel 4 had a game by the name of "Out of This named Master and his lillie minion Vicious. bling along in a pack, it's indescribable. Plot 2 World." With a slick story line and really Master is like any other evil dude. sitting atop Of course. the play control is good once Difficulty 2 cool cinematic scenes, the game was one of a floating throne of skulls wearing a robe and you gel used to it. and the music is well done. Fun 5 the innovators for the SNES. Add to that the constantly cloaked in shadows. Vicious is a There is also an interesting interaction with Overall 18/25 twisted punles and "Out of This World" is pink version of Gonzo with a runny nose. the background in some places. It isn'tlike one of the games that 1 have always thought And so it comes to pass that you. as Andy. some side scrolling games. where you could was the best for the system. must work your way through the multiple be fighting enemies anywhere; differences in game is fairly low. Many years have elapsed since those dark levels leading to a final showdown with Mas terrain and region decide how you can move Second, as good as the movie scenes are, ages of gaming, and it has come to pass that ter and Vicious. The trip through the game is and what you have to do nexl they have flaws. They really do nothing to the designers of "Out of This World" have very well detailed, with lovely backgrounds But "Heart of Darkness" suffers from the move the story along, only to set up where turned their attention to the new platforms and extremely hair-frazzling traps. two problems that plagued its predecessor. you will be lighting next That makes the with the richly animated "Heart ofDarkness ." The many ways that Andy dies are just First. if attacked with brute force. the game story itself fairly convoluted and sketchy. In "Heart of Darkness;· you are the young overwhelming. From being done in by a will be beaten. I prefer the tag-team method So, if you have the chance. go and rent boy Andy. Through some twisted circum "Tremors" style wom1 with an audible crunch where players are alternated every three lives. "Heart of Darkness" for a couple of days. beat stances, you are exploring a distant land in to plummeting down a cliff to his death. the And going through the game once is enough. it, then take it back. It is a generally good search of your beloved dog, Whisky. Seeing game doesn't skimp on cutesy animated gore. It's really nice to see all of the levels the lirst game to have for a little while. but you won't as the game seems to be geared to a family More kudos go to the game designers for time. but after that, the replay factor for this want to keep iL Cliche Gridlock Slows Down Rush Hour Welcome. to tlie. Jackie Chan and Chris !Features Section/ Tucker Do the Buddy You. read £t every week. You. enter the Unsert Cop-Thing Standardly name here] contest and JAMIE PECK you, read thejtne pr£nt. Rt•trie\'l'l' \keklv Staff Writer You.jtnd ou.t what Jamie Rarely docs one's opinion of a lilm hang yeck thtnks qf ajtim exclusively around their tolerance for its lead actor. but such 1s the case with Rush Hour bifore you. spend .$7. 00 <**out of four). The star in question is Chris to see tt. You.r dtnners Tucker. that mamc motormoutll to end all manic motormouths whose turns in The Fifth are str£ct~y 'Su.rvtva~ Elemenr and Money Talks left aud1ences in sk.tUet•Jare. You. re~y convulsion tits - either they were on the floor laughing or having seizures induced by onyou.r week~y 'Sweat his helium-high voice. Yes. Chris Tucker is and BZNM'I.' workout w£th back and wound-up tighter than ever. and those who enjoy his bug-eyed ballistics can ..Mart£n Shu.st6r to bu.rrz. walk into theatres completely free of anxi df th~ •s u. rvtvai sktUet• ety. Enjoying Rush Hour. however, might be another matter entirely. fare. You.joUow Jason For the record. I don't mind Tucker much Eaton's ~if6 tn 'Hotei at all. Sure. he can be as irksome as finger nails on a blackboard at times. but so could .Me' and you. votedfor Jim Carrey back in his pee-Truman Show you.rjavor£tes tn the days. Rather. the problem with him in Rush Hour is that his squealy self and frantic an 'Battl.-6 # th6 com£cs. I tics just don't sit well with the role he's play You'd Uke to travel- wtth ing-a rogue LAPD detective named James Carter. Check out the opening scene (which Anna K.apian. You, pian genre fans know has ultimately very little to you.r schedu,ie Uts£n3 do with the rest of the lilm), in which Carter 1 takes part in a sting operation to trap an ex A.rou.nd Town• and plosives dealer. Urn, could he or his cop-en 'InctdentaUy .... 'You. dangering shtick be any harder to swallow? Rush Hour becomes a little more palatable oniy Usten to •what once Jackie Chan enters the picture, cast as a They want You. to Hear. I Hong Kong inspector who teams up with New Line Cinema Carter to crack the kidnapping of the Chi The Featu,res Sect£on Bangin' Tough: As a Hong Kong detective assigned to a kidnaping case in Los nese Consul's 11-year-old daughter, a ca-;e Angeles, Jackie Chan holds on for dear life in Rush Hour. aireadej shapes c!jou.r that spans their respective countries. Chan fans might be disappointed by how little the Chinese bad guy); it wouldn't be funny if it matched-buddy-cop story, we also get the iife. WheY notJoln master martial artist gets to simultaneously were the other way around, and it's not funny fish-out-of-water and renegade-man-of-the the Features display his flair for physical comedy and the way it is. Much more successful is the law angles and a climactic red-wire-or-blue killer moves; a scene where he baules bad film's comedy when it plays up the cuJlure wire moment to top everything off. Though Teamqfcrack guys while protecting the priceless exhibits clash between Chan and Tucker: this star and nobody will presumably accuse Rush Hour wr£ters? caU in an art museum is classic Chan, a scene star-on-tllc-rise have a nice rapport both on of breaking new cinematic ground, it's a tad where his Carter-inspired use of a racial epi screen and off, the latter evidenced by the on the disheartening side that this match made Features r.dttor thet gets him in trouble in a bar full of Afri now-notorious Chan tradition of showing in odd-couple heaven fails to enhance the fa chrtsttna at can-Americans is not. outtakes over the end credits. Here, it's good miliar plot motions to memorable lengths. If That bit aside, Rush Hour's humor of stuff worth sticking around for, especially you're a praying person, get on your knees .x1Z6() to get choice seems to be disparaging quips directed when the two slip up together. - then, maybe Chan and Tucker will get a starte,d. at Asians ('T ve been lookin' for your sweet The title must refer to a grid lock of cliches screenplay that's up to their collective speed and-sour chicken ass!" Carter screeches to a instead of cars-not only do we get the mis- in the inevitable Rush Hour 2. THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY FEATURES October 20, 1998 PAGEl? GOOD · A Night at the Roxbury Is a Night to· Forget WEEKLY JAMIE PECK INCOME proc... tng mall for natlon11 comp•nyl FrH Wayne s World a... ide, tummg fa\ orite Sat q,.•. poata••• No~ urday Night Li~·e shtick into box office gold lngl Bonuaest Start 11ft1Moo has been nothing but nsky bu!>.iness -you dlataiJI ~ opportu.. niiYI . might remember any one of Concht•cul'>, Stuart Sal'es /lis !·amity or It:\ Pat, and if Plea•• ruata Long Self· you don't,th•lt's the idea. Whut \\ urks on tele Ad*•••lopeto ad~-_,.,..... e.. vision in live-minute portion-; is more lhan likely going to suffer when the running time MPC;~- 204511t. ZJon Rd and picture size arc multiplied by 17. and . MORROW, GA30260 . that's just the problem with J\ Night at the Roxbury (** out of four). SNL's latest skit to-screen offering. It faJls somewhere be tween the Wayne highs and the Pat lows. The SNL incarnation of Roxbury, as fans -,n DY I'\ of the sho\\ already know, follows the plight of two wild-and-crazy-\\annabcs (played by Will Ferrell and Chris Kattan) a.. they peruse OXFORD Paramount Pictures - and get thrown out of- the L.A. club Sitting Swingers: Chris Kattan and Will Ferrell bring their Saturday Night Uve skit scene for violently pelvic-thrusting pretty to the big screen in A Night at the Roxbury. Live with British ladies, all the while bobbing their heads to students in the the beat of Haddaway's dance hit "What Is boring business involving trampy gold-dig be, er, complimented for their ability to, uh, Love?" Not much meat to build an 87-minute gers, brotherly dissension and Steve's im lose themselves in their characters. center of Oxford story on. and boy, does it show. For those pending nuptials with the heiress (Molly Sh Loni Anderson shows up with that scary as an Associate Student keeping track, the movie's biggest accom annon) of a ligbtbulb enterprise. cleavage of hers as the Butabis' plastic sur of an Oxford college at plishment is giving these loser siblings names At least that last development allows for gery-addicted mom, and Chazz Palminteri an 2ffordable price. -Steve and Doug Butabi. an uproarious wedding climax that manages does a tum as the Roxbury's owner, a goateed The Butabis • ambition, for lack of a better to pull off witty jabs at The Graduate, Say lothario fond of asking various friends and $8,2SO a semester. word, is to one day gain passage into the Anything and Jerry Maguire, all one right patrons, "Did you grab my ass?" But the 1\lltion, Housing, Roxbury, a swank, Studio 54-esquc nighL<;pot after the other. And although those spoofs are former refrains from speaking much and the Meals included. that celebs like Richard Grieco (playing him probably Roxbury's sole claims to hitting the latter isn't even billed- it seems that even Summer tenn option self) frequent. Once Steve (Ferrell) and Doug comedic bullseye, there is enough sporadic the on-hand talent was aware of how un (Kanan) finally make it inside. due to a lowbrow silliness to impress those looking evenly unhip A Night at the Roxbury is. Oh, Grieco-involved auto mishap that's perhaps for a cinematic good time a Ia Dumb and sure, those that eat the Butabis up in thetr Oxford Study the most complicated thing about the film, Dumber- these guys make those guys look weekly fragmented SNL fonnat will really Abroad Progranune the Roxbury angle is pushed a!>.ide for some like Stanford grads. Ferrell and Kattan must love this ... but what is love, really? 33-35 George Street Oxford OX12AY England • • • • • • Telephone and Facsunile: 011 44 1865 798738 E-mail: now in theatres ... [email protected] Capsule reviews of curre/11 modes by Victory Marasigan and Jamie Peck. Beloved C***1/z) A -.tudy in skillfullitcr.uy ad· aptation. Director Jonathan Dcmme 's ver-ion of Toni Morrison's acclaimed nO\cl spoon feeds lhalluli'i)'(JU all rtleui&Wr)\lay nothing to the viewer. telling the ~upcrnutural, tmldUC!IIf brll\Q u\ld h\ill\ thi 19th century-set story of Sethc (Oprah Winfrey). an escaped slave long haunted by an unforgiv 1 land 1 paptlr. pla1t1t, m qlan rh able sin. Winfrey herself is arguably Belmwl's ~·ou'v bt: n r cycling greatest asset, so convincing you forget she B•t ff.ll!r.rp ~rtllnq wor ln\1 to shines bright!) on a TV talk show. Though the film might be a challenge to watch, it's a dis· 11Vh 1 1111!1\1 yuiJ quieting. one-of-a-kind, powerful experience. (See the 10/13/98 issue of Tire Rctrierc>r l*·eklr for a full review.) -VM Clay Pigeons <**) The alway-.-'>'elcome pres· Touchstone Picture~ ence of Janeane Garofalo almost sa\es thi ba Beloved Trio: Kimberly Elise. Oprah Winfrey and Thandie Newton are haunted by nal black corned) about a Montana nogoodnik (Joaquim Phoenix) \\ho tind h~'f. £\iot I'm going to JUjitsu no .... lt'6 a martial art. from ... hat I c.an t~\1. it'6 ~apan"~ for ·mawc.hl6nt '-- OOFI \urn from thi6? &ronn bola of lulh IMM jut! l~~:e blood.. \ il ... PAGE19 The NeuroBehavioral Unit (NBU) of the Kennedy Krieger Institute is seeking applicants in the fields of Psychology, Special Education or Early Childhood Education for the position of Clinical Assistant. Clinical Assistants provide patient supervision 24 hours a day and are responsible for implementing behavioral and educational protocols, data Saturday the 24th Guilt by Association collection. assisting with self-car activities, and ensuring patient safety. Join Lisa Suckdog (Rollerderby) and Dame Check out the Associates tonight at Bar Darcy (Meatcake) at the Ouobar for Anti· Harbor in Canton. The show is from I 0-1, This is an excellent position for individuals interested in gaining experi folk night. For more info. call the Ouobar and the barb located on the corner of Es ... ex be at 410-752-0TIO. ofcour..e. and Leakm . at 2239 Essex. For more info. ence needed to competitive for graduate school. The Kennedy Krieger call 410-327-0100. They're very helpful Institute also offers full-time employees comprehensive benefits which Wednesday the 21st there. include tuition reimbursement, medical and dental insurance. "Please Define 'Is"" Go to a Goodwill retail store. They have all Par ty Like it's 1985 lndil•iduals interested in this important opportunity should forward their you need tor groovy costumes for Hallow The Depot ha~ a rctro dance pany every resume and a cover letter to the address belo"~ een. Their Ad: "For J(l-t days. it'!> a siLe 18 Saturday night. No cover! S2 dome~tic!'> and dress and a tape recorder. On Halloween, S2 house 'hooters. not to mention .50 cent Kennedy Krieger Institute it's Linda Tripp." 'Nuff said. Call informa domestic draft~ from 9-ll p.m. Get drunk Department of Human Resources tion for the store nearest to you - no. not and do the safety dance. 707 North Broadway campus infom1ation. ~11 information. MD21205 Sunday the 25th Thursday the 22nd Cold. Wet and \tiles From Home r-iot to be Confu..ed With tbe Ugly Pilgrim Co rafting. c;mocing or paddling on the Thing Shenandoah and Potomac Rivers. Beats the Go -.ee String Chec~ lncident at the Rec hell out of com Oakes and "Roderick' t:or Room in TO\\ son. If nothing else. they get Breakfruot." Call River & trail outfitters at prop~ for the name. Hang out. play pool. visit JOI-695-5177, or visit their web site at hllp:/ wtth our friendly rivals from TSU No bar lwww.rivenmil.com. room brawls, please. Tix are available at the club and through PROTlX. Charge by phone Monday the 26th Take a at 410-481-6500,orcall the clubat410-337· Nothing Happens on Mondays 7178. According to our pal Kristin. the best place to be on a Monday night is at Harry Friday the 23rd Browne's in Annapolb, to witne~s the Please Note the Nearest Exit in the Event drunken song stylings of Seamus Kennedy. Practice Test. of an Emergency an Irish singer from Belfast. Tite show is Go see a movie. For mainstream stuff, go to from 9 p.m. to I a.m. and he Lake~ two for Towson (410-825-5233). Reisterstown mal breaks to have a pint- that is to say. he Saturday, November 7, 10 AM (410-358-6656), Wcstvicy, Mall (410-719· consistently drink~ Guinncss throughout the UMBC Chem/Physlcs Bldg. - 2nd floor 9000). Eastpoint (410-284-3100). For Ansy set. He goes so far as to employ the help of Stuff that doesn't involve exploding dogs, the audience and their Guinnesses during a hit the Charles (41 0-727-3456). and for pure song that requires dnnking at set intcrvab. Take a practice test and receive individual feedback detailing ambiance, go to the Senator (41 0-435-8338). A good time is - and will be. if you're there your test-taking strengths & weaknesses. And remember the extra buller. And the Jun had by aiL Harry Browne's is located off $5 pre-registration or $7 day of the event. ior Mint:.. And a large Diet Coke. of State Circle in An napoli~. For more info All proceeds benefit the Blo Chemistry Club. caJI410-269-5124. Results will be distributed on November 17 at 6pm with the location TBA. Please call to reserve your seat. 1 1 TEST l :f.Jijh lll·BOOwww·KAP·.kaplan.com • Test l\llllel are Qualified egg donors needed! Compassionate, female, ages 21-30, college educa tion preferred, current health insurance, healthy and drug free. Medical/legal expenses paid, compensa tion for services. CONFIDENTIAL. Interested? For more infqrmation, please call Peggy at 410-583-0688, anytime. Have a submission for \Rot 1 Tr)\~'N or I ental~ m? Direct them to UC214, care of Jen Siciliano! PAGE20 Oct. 20, 1998 SPORTS Navy Lavery Wins 200th as Volleyball Defeats Breezes Past Robert Morris CHRIS KERNER UMBC Rc•lrit'n'r Weeki}' Edi/Orial S1ajf "learns 111 the NCAA·s [tourna Women ment] \\ill definitely underesti mate u-;:' said women's volle)iball head coach Catherine Lavery fol lo"'ing her team's demolition of their fiflh consecutive conference opponent in Robert Morris with The UMBC women's scores of 15-0. 15-3 and 15-3 on soccer team dropped a 3-0 Saturday. Whether it's confidence dcch.ion against Na\ y on or sheer effrontery. no one can ar Saturday afternoon at gue with the coach ·s :!00 wins in UMBC Soccer Pitch. Navy her 300 career matches at UMBC. has now won five stmight There is no guarantee that this games, and the Mids arc 12- team will make the tournament, 2 on the season. The Navy but Lavery does not even think team is particularly strong about that. "Our goal is to reach one that contains players the NCAA's and try and win there. from every region of the That is what we are preparing for." nation. With this loss. Jason Putschc I Retriever Weekly Staff The competition on Saturday UMBC's record falls to 8- Kick Retriever legs proved too tired it: provided another example of NEC 6. The game against Navy to defeat Navy. volleyball. combined with Re was a non-league contest, and At 54:30 Navy scored it second triever dominance. UMBC never UMBC Northeast conference goal on a rebound off UMBC trailed in the match as they opened record continues to be 5-1 on the goalie Robins, that Katie Moore with 15 consecutive points to take season. tricked in the comer of the goal. Smashed!: Sophomore Kara Welniak and tea mates have had a n the first game. The team showed In the game against Navy. the Melissa Rains of Navy was cred easy time when facing NEC opponents this season. no signs of letting up in the sec Mids kept up the pressure on ited with the assist on the play. ond or third games either as they 371. She also ranks fourth on the Coach Lavel) 's 200th career win. UMBC defense for almost the en- Navy's third goal at 70:29 came cruised to identicaJ 15-3 scores. As active kill leaders list with 1,743. ''I wasn't even aware that it was tire first half. The Mids had many on an offensive b~akaway after a a team they scored eight aces on Fellow senior La.l\lae Baker. who my 200lh win. It doesn't even close shots on goaJ that were just failed UMBC clear. the play. In serve and 24 digs. Senior Megan recorded 25 assists against Rob matter to me. What is important wide of the net. Navy got on the Navy's Becky Murphy fired a shot McNamara led the Retrievers with ert Morris. ranks eighth in the is that we played well and I con scoreboard for the first time at that Robins of UMBC could not eight kills whiJe senior Lisa Cline country in aces with 0.64 per tinue to do my job as a coach. I 35:06. when Michelle Nance control. Navy's Murphy then re and sophomore Kara Welniak re game. The team as a whole ranks am happy with the way I am scored after she collected the ball covered the ball and scored on a corded seven apiece. 14th in total service aces with 2.30 coaching and that I am at UMBC," in front of the UMBC goal and shot just a few yards from the goal. Coming into the game, C line per game. reflected Lavery after the match. fired a five-yard shot to score. The UMBC had many chances to was ranked 16th in the nation in The win catapulted UMBC to The Retrievers will be on the score came just after a shot by score, but seemed unable to find kills per game with 5.01, and sec 14-6 overall and 5-0 in conference road until November 3, beginning the open offensive ond in total kills this season with play. This match also marked with Tuesday's match at Loyola. player and their shots kept narrowly miss ing. During the con Men Rebound Versus Monmouth, test. Navy out shot UMBC 20-5. During play, Navy wac; called Howard for three vocal warn ings by the referee. RYAN MORSE but UMBC never re Relru:n:r ~\lukl' Srajf Wri1er ceived the man ad vantage. After la't Friday·s heartbreaking In the second half. overtime loss to Farleigh DK:kinson. Navy kept up the the men's soccer team needed. not pressure defense only. a huge win for momentum. but against the Retriev also to pick up ground in the confer ers. Robins for ence standings. They accomplished UMBC had eight both of these goals last week by saves: many of the knocking off Monmouth on Sunday saves were excellent at the soccer pitch and defeating and helped keep the Howard Wednesday on the road. On A Roll: J unior Ty Engram and the Retrievers gained two more Retrievers in the They improved their record to 9-4-1 wins last week, raising their record to 9-4-1. game. UMBC top overall and 3-2-1 in the conference. scoring at the II :58 mark when scoring leaders Erin The win over Monmouth proved UMBC freshman Andy Wells. at either just wide or just high on seven Bnan Mackey I Retriever Weekly Staff Close Ca ll : Navy proved too tough for Lesh and Nicole important because the Hawks had tempting to clear the ball from the different occa~ions in the first half. Jessaka Phoebus and UMBC. Brooks were kept been in a three-way tie for second in goal area. sent the ball on th~: ground The) finally got on the board early without goals by the the conference with St. Francis(NY) instead of getting it airborne. lead in the second half at 47:43 when Navy that had resulted in an out Navy team to preserve a shut out and Central Connecticut at 3-1. ing to a two-on-one for Monmouth freshman James Hamilton sent a pa-;s standing save by Mandy Robins against the Retrievers. UMBC was in fifth place \\'ith a and the goal from Anthony right in front of the net and sopho of UMBC. At half time Navy led UMBC"s final regular season record of 2-1-1. The win ties theRe Viscariello. more Ryan Cuomo poked it in for the 1-0. home game is October 20, 7 p .. m. trievers with Monmouth in the con From then on. the Monmouth net goal. In the second half. the Navy of against Richmond here at UMBC ference standings. seemed to ~brink every time UMBC Follo"'ing Cuomo's tally, the t\\O fense kept up the scoring pressure. Stadium. On Sunday, the Ha\\'ks started the took a :-hot. The Retrievers missed see SOCCER, page 21 THE RETRIEVER WEEKLY SPORTS October 20, 1998 PAGE21 Soccer Move Up in NEC Club Sports from SOCCER. page 20 On Wednesday, UMBC traveled to Wash teams remained quiet until80:26. At that point ington D.C. to take on Howard University. UMBC Crew Rows Strong in juniorTy Engram sent a beautiful airborne pass UMBC continued the domination that they into the middle and sophomore Brandon have had over the Bison for the past several Thomson headed it into the left part of the net. years by scoring a goal in each half and win Weekend Competition Monmouth threatened a couple of times late, ning 2-0. Engram was instument.al in this game including a shot at the buzzer, but nothing else as well, scoring one goal and assisting Cuomo This past Sunday, the UMBC crew team weight for a heavyweight male rower is would get by freshman goalkeeper Tom Wunk on the other. Retriever goalie Wunk earned his traveled to Virginia to compete in the 165lbs, UMBC's heavyweights average 6'2" who had three saves on the day. third shutout as a Retriever by stopping all of "Occoquan Chase" 5000 meter regatta. The and 190lbs. In finishing second out of nine When asked how important this win was, Howard's shots. crew's 15 hour day began at 5:30am, as the crews, the novice heavyweights out-rowed head coach Pete Caringi said, "This game was At press time the team had played a game rowers prepared and loaded their boats for regional powerhouses of Virginia Tech, Johns our whole season. ll was extremely important with Marist College and in the upcoming week the 90-minute trailer ride to the Occoquan Hopkins. Mary Washington, and George because we had been playing good soccer and will travel to New York to play Long Island race course. For most of this team of 65, the Mason University. losing and it was important to get a conference University on Friday and St. Francis(NY) on Occoquan Chase was the firSt race of the year. Earlier in the day, sixteen-year-old fresh win otherwise it would have been a very rough Sunday. UMBC entered a school record of 11 boats men novice coxswain, Nina Armah, coaxed road ahead." in the aU day event of nearly 200 total en the women's novice lightweight eight to a trants. This included three varsity women's' fourth place finish in a field of eight. The fours, and two men's' fours. On the novice lightweight women rowed in the ··open" cat side, the crew fielded two men's eights, one egory. featuring a mix of mostly heavyweight women's eighL a novice women's four. and crews. a novice men's single. Fall races are usually referred to as ''head The varsity crews saw mixed levels of suc races." Each ere\\ first rows upstream. then. cess. with a strong performance on the turns around and races the 5000 meter. or 3.1 women's' side. The women's varsity "A" mlie. course. A t} pica! 5000m row takes boat led the charge for UMBC by fimshing about 20 minutes. although most UMBC first among collegiate programs and third crews rowed 111 less this time. helped b) a overall in a "fast" mix of nine crews. The strong wmd pushing down the course most strong finish by rowers Renee Foard, Susan of the day. The coaches, Wells. Soprey and Hannum. Alicia Hodro\\ Eh Zukow~ki I Retriever Weekly Staff emerging potential, finishing second out of the men's varsity lightweight four travel tO Caption: Sophomore Bill Nelson passes ball to freshman teammate Matt Joseph in three in their event. only 16 seconds behind Boston for the prestigious "Head of the one of Retrievers two victories last week. the winning Johns Hopkins crew. Charles" regatta. The Charles is the largest The previously untested novices, coached regatta 111 North America and is an invitation by UMBC rowing alumnae Bill Wells and only event. The crew has fundraisers to off John Mischke Sunil Soprey. turned in a strong overall per set the cost of this trip. with the remaining ~ formance. \\ith flashes of enormous poten cost coming from each competing athlete. tial from the men's novice "hea\ yweight" T\\O years ago, UMBC's \\Omen's varsit) eight. As that eight rowed past the spectator four broke through by finishing eleventh in stands, the mostly novice UMBC ro.... er!> on the country in a field of sixty crews. After Realigning the NFL shore :.crambled for a cheer to encourage the Charles and the Head of the Occoquan, them on. They quickly realized that their the crc"' finish~~ its season with a 2000 meter Next season, "'ith th~ r~birth of tbe suspects) to pack up their bag' and move screeches were drov. ned out by several hun race in Philadelphia. on November 7th. The Clc,•eland Bro.,.. ns. the NFL will have one to Cleveland - but the moving of the dred other spectators and spontaneously crew is opstimistic about its chances for suc of th~ mo:-;t ab~un.J :.ituations in the history BrO\\ns to Baltimore scared cities enough broke into a chant of "fatboys! fatboys!" cess in these upcoming races. ofsports-31 teams playing a sport v.hich. to get a slew of new stadiums appro\'cd. Fat boys is the self-selected nickname of the in order to be equitable, requin!s a very In any case. the damage is done. The next heavyweight eight. Although the minimum This artJ·icle was submitted by the UMBC s1milar amount of rest and planning for all question is. where will the 1999 Cle,·cJand Crew Team. teams between games. There is no way Brov.n." play? The answer will undouht around having an odd numb~r of teams; at edJy be in a six-team AFC Central Divi least on~ team ''ill have an open date ev sion. at least for a couple of years until ery "e~k of th~ ~cason. another expansion team .trn\ cs ami more UMBC Athletic Calendar At least one unfortunate team will expe wholcscale realignment is nl:CCS'-al). rience the unfairness of mis,ing \\eek One When that other team amvcs. it will un Week of October 18 - 25 and then pia) ing 16 in a rov. (the early line doubtedly take v;eeb of behind-doors is that that team ''Ill be the Raven~. tn or dealing to come out wuh a realignment Men's Soccer der to appease the rest ol the country and solution that io; acceptable for all: \\hen Friday, October 23- @Long Island- 6:00 pumsh Art Modell) At least one team will the 1\'FL-AFL merger Get Involved With SGA!!! In-House Elections Five SGA Senate seats are currently available to any undergraduate student with at least a 2.25 GPA (first semester students are exempt form this requirement). The Election will be held at the SGA meeting on Monday, october 26 in Lecture Hall 3. Please apply at the student Activities Office, located on the second floor of the UC. Applications are due no later than Thursday, October 22. For more information, stop by the SGA Denate office or call at ext. 2224! CoiDIDuter Student •••••••••••••• • Rideshare Has Returned! • • Save time, money, and sanity by carpooling! For • more info, contact Keith Korthals at x2770 or stop by uc 207. s Visit CSS Ask Me About.Table outside the UC e Pub on Tuesdays from 11 :30AM- 2:30PM. Com r muter Advisor lmran Feroz will answer all your v• commuting questions! I * Parking * Student Life * On-Campus Jobs * c Sponsored by the University Center e University Center~ Room 207 ~ 410-455-2770 s PAGE24 Oct. 20,1998 CLASSIFIEDS Classified Advertising I II I Club Notices Lost&Found Office Hours ETI~I E\'EI~ ------~~ a section for UMBC is a free community sen ice Rates per 30 WORDS Monday through Friday R\'\' I: 1: K I. Y student clubs to make offered to UMBC students. $6.00 9:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. announcements only. faculty. and staff. (Limit 5 linel>) 50~ EACH BOLDED WORD University Center 21-+ Student club~ may have Does not include PERSONALS. 1000 Hilltop Circle five lines free. LOST & FOUND. Classified Display Bait i nwre. f\1 D 21250 Each additional line co~ts $1.50 Personals Cl UB NOTICES, i\ds may he placed in may be placed at our offices OR Til RifT SJ lOP sections. Advertising during regular hours. The cost is person at the above Sec separate rate schedules Rates Per Column Inch: Thrift Shop $1.00 for a four-line ad: for more i nfonnauon. address. mailed in. or additional lines are 25¢ each. Under 10 Column Inches is a Retrie~·er Wt•t•kly student faxed in. There is a 50~ charge $10.30 community service which provides Deadline for personals which arc in all ( 41 0) 455-1260 UMBC students 3 free lines capitals or include bolded lines. AU advertisments under of advertising for any textbook or Each personal must be pre-paid Classilicd ad~ arc due 5:00p.m. $30 must be prepaid Fax: (-+I 0) --1-55-1265 item fOR SALE under S50. and filled out Avulablc &o 'u.aJn1h currrnlltt on the T·riday preceding the issue. before insertion. carolled ••t:~ll!(' OOI) • on a separate form. Models-Athletes, Body Builders, Call 410-262-2201 vices Building. A $40.00 di AITfl SCHOOl NIINNIES or Great Face, males, 19-32 ploma fee, payable at the $30.00 hourly, (positively no SPRINGBREAK Cashier's Office, is also re JOBS IDW fOI COUIGI STUDINrS charges to applicants) Cancun, Florida, Jamaica, quired. If you have any ques call 41 0-719-6246, after 12 South Padre, Bahamas, Etc. tions, please contact the Advise •WORK AFTER SCHOOL FROM 3:00-6:00 PM noon. Best Hotels, Parties, Prices. ment Center at x2500. •HAVE YOUR WEEKENDS FREE Book Early and Savell •MUST BE AT LEAST 18 YRS OLD WITH CAR Production Crew Earn Money + Trips! Campus SWING to the sounds of TO Setup/strike props and sets for Reps/ Organizations Wanted TALLY CONFUSED from 9 p.m. busy special events company. Call Inter-Campus Programs 1- midnight, November 7, 1998 at Flexible day/night/weekend 800-327-6013 www.lcpt.com St. Clement's Church in EARN $7-$8/HR. hours. Will work with your Lansdowne, MD. Enjoy a free schedule. dance lesson from 8-9 p.m. MISCELLANEOUS CALL Clean driving record preferred. Food, beer, wine, and soda on $7/hr. 410-539-7274 x115 sale. Advanced ticket sales, $10 Room for rent about 5 mi. from and $12 at the door. 410-730-2229 CANCUN * JAMAICA * campus. Includes utilities, laun All proceeds benefit the STTAR dry, and kitchen. Pets in house. Call Fran (41 0) 666-8952. MAZATLAN * ACAPULCO Center (Sexual Trauma Treat HELP WANTED NASSAU * FLORIDA * S Call 410-747-1750, MWF after ment, Advocacy and 7p.m. CAD-GRAPHICS OPERATOR PADRE Recovery Center), which helps TELEMARKETER PIT Travel Free and make lots of victims of child abuse and for engineering company HB - You are my perfect. I love $10/hr +Bonus, M-Th 5-9 p.m. Cash!! sexual assault. In Linthicum. Skills: Windows 95 you with all of my hearts. Al A growing Pikesville mortgage Motivated Reps are offered full Call 41 0-290-6432 for informa applications, CAD, architectural ways, PL. Co. seeks responsible person blueprint reading. time staff jobs. tion. with good communication skills. 20-30 hours per week required. Lowest price Guaranteed. Call We will train you. Computer Graphics or Engi now for details! PRESS RELEASE CLUB NOTICES Call Stuart 410-602-4001 neering major helpful. www.classtravel.com 800- 838-6411 E-mail: [email protected] The deadline for undergraduate The Commuting Students Asso SALES PART-TIME students to apply for December PARENT HELPER WANTED. ciation will have our 2nd meet Cohens Clothiers in TUTORS NEEDED 1998 graduation is Tuesday, One mile from campus, flexible ing on Mon., Sept. 28, 1998 at Cockeysville need several en Youth Enrichment (Columbia) September 15. Graduating se thusiastic individuals to sell hours. Live out or may exchange 1:00 p.m. Paid and Volunteer pos. niors can pick up a diploma ap Meet at UC 317. We'll give info. mens/boys clothing in evenings Contact 41 0-992-4229 for room, board. plication in the Advisement Cen On our picnic/hike @ Patapsco and weekends. Computer experience a plus. ter, Room 102 Academic Ser- state park. The Retriever Weekly • IS he greatest publication in the entire his y of Western Ci~ilization.