2 I 'Il1c ~rrrnt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I NEWS 1ChrQ:Ufftnt VOL. 45, ISSUE 1363 WWW.THECURRENT-ONLINE.COM College websites increase in importance for EDITORIAL Editor-in-Chief...... Matthew B. Poposky Managing Editor...... Jeremy Zschau pr pect·ve students while searching colleges News Editor...... Minho Jung Features Editor...... Ashley Atkins HAll FLiNTROP Sports Editor...... Owen Shroyer Staff \'\jriter A&E Editor...... Cate Marquis Opinions Editor...... Jeremy Zschau The checklist used by colors like green or purple. exploration for a student; would expect a website Copy Editors ...... Sara Novak, Johanna Hoffarth, C. Rogers srudenrs when shopping Additionally, 94 percent if it is too difficult for that not only functions but Staff Writers ...... David von Nor- for an institution of higher of content throughout all them to learn about and impresses. dheim, Greg Laine, Yusef Roach, Ryan Krull, Maddie Harned, education seems to ha\re higher education websites learn to love the university Yet, web design is still Endea Wilbert, Eli Dains, Dan Spak, Mavis Hollis, Sha­ a new item creeping to is in some type of "Sans" online, the student may not the only, or even the ron Pruitt{ Joseph Grate, Aladeen Klonowski, Hali Flintrop the top of the list: their font, which can also be not bother to look deeper most important aspect of DESIGN websites. As universities considered bland and not into a the university a university to consider. go online, letting their evocative. through other means and Hung Nguyen, freshman, Design Editor...... Janaca Scherer websites do the talking, The idea is that websites go elsewhere. chemistry and English, Photo Editor ...... Jennifer Meahan which in turn causes the serve, in many ways, as Education News also said that, when he was Web Editor...... Yusef Roach design and functionality a university's head of reported some ironic looking for schools, if it Staff Photographers ...... Nikki Vahle, Jarred Gastreich, Sarah Lowe, Erica Thompson of a university's website advertising-they can be findings about very had been a strict contest of Illustrators ...... Karlee Sellars to playa large and ever the first contact a student technology centered web design, the University increasing role in a has with a university. schools and their of Missouri - St. Louis BUSI ESS srudenr's decision to arrend The issue is certainly technologically backwards website sucks, and he a particular university. more than just aesthetics websites. "Of the top would not even be here: Business Manager...... John Wallace ten engineering schools, other colleges win by far. Advertising Director...... Thomas Wombacher There are a lot of such as color and font. Distribution Manager...... Ryan Krull mistakes universi ties can The websites should be several have a hefty "The website is one factor Advisor ...... Charlotte Petty make when designing their friendly, informative and share of W3C errors - in many factors. It does websi tes that can turn easily navigable. If they UC Berkeley is #4 and make a difference because CONTACT US prospective students off are not, or do not at least has 33 errors [ ... ]The . the information about the Address 388 MSC, 1 University Blvd rather than successfully provide other easy avenues University of Phoenix - school and the ease for Saint Louis, MO 63121-4400 attracting them. An through which a student the undisputed leader in students of getting that Newsroom 314-516-5174 Education Nev;s article can glean information online education - has information definitely Business/Advertising 314-516-5316 entitled "Best Education about the university and 198 errors in its CSS code, shows how much a school Fax 314-516-6811 Sites Shows Colleges That get into conract with the while the average for the cares and how prestigious E-mail (General) [email protected] Rule the Web" reported university, the university top 400 university websites it is, but a lot of schools E-mail (Advertising) [email protected] that the vast majority of runs the very real risk is around 40," Educati'on may be small and under­ E-mail (Employment Inquiries) [email protected] higher education wcbsitcs of discouraging studenrs News said. Lackluster, budgeted and can be good E-mail (Tips / What's Current) [email protected] J feature bland colors, such and turning them off just poorly functioning schools without having the Twitter umslcurrent Facebook The Current as grey or black, while through their website. websites would be best website. The website few feature gripping, A university s website especiaUy cr.ippling for plays a limited role. There's ABOUT roche IDIrrrnt aggressive colors such as is also often the most technological universities, only so much a website can red or innovative, original convenient channel of from whom srudents tell you," Nguyen said. The Current is the student newspaper at the University of Missouri­ St. Louis, printing weekly through the fall and spring semesters on Mondays. Advertising rates are available upon request; terms, condi­ . UMSL November Police Report tions and restrictions apply. The Current, financed in part by student 11121 - 9:30 a.m. - an unknown individual. An Meadows. A Resident Natural Bridge Road. Fire activities fees, is not an official publication of UM-St. Louis. UMSL Police responded to ongoing investigation has Advisor reported an Department determined The University is not responsible for the content of The Current and/ a report on West Drive. An begun. unknown person broke a a possible malfunction; or its policies. All materials contained in each printed and online is­ UMSL employee reported 11122 - 9: 15 p.m. - window in his apartment, maintenance was notified for sue are property of The Current and may not be reprinted, reused, or that a mirror on a custodial UMSL Police responded to maintenance respoded to a replacement. reproduced without the prior, expressed and written consent of The vehicle was damaged while a report at the 1-1ark Twain board up the window until it 11127 - 12:10 p.m. - Current. parked on West Drive. Gym. An UMSL student could be replaced. UMSL Police responded to The Current accepts letters to the editor. All letters should be brief, 11/21 - 4:40 p.m. - reported that a cell phone 11126 - 10:15 p.m. - a report in Barnes Library and those not exceeding 250 words will be given preference. The Cur­ UMSL Police responded to a was stolen from his gym bag. UMSL Police responded that a sink and coumertop rent edits letters for clarity and length, not for dialect, correctness, in­ report from an UMSL stafff 11/25 - 11: 16 p.m. - to a carbon monoxide had collapsed in a women's tent or grammar. All letters must be signed and must include a daytime member about receiving a UMSL Police responded restroom. Maintenance was phone number and, where applicable, student number. The Editor-in­ Qf.f<1$?in. t~l~Rhone call i!,9 .ql _",.~".:· ~""'."'.RQ r.t ,5!,! Up' e . ?;,- -- ~ 0'7-::: - ~~ Chief reserves the right to respond to and to deny any letters. --- .< AFFILIATIONS SUN. 46 MCMA U 32 NEWS I I WWW.lliECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I a ~ITrnt I 3 Susan Ke dig takes charge of Missouri Task Force on Prematurity Infant mortality rates and prematurity stats analyzed and reported in Missouri

MINHOJUNG New s Editor

Susan Kendig, associ- work on this very imp or- problems and disabilities, According to the Mis- Task Force cannot prevent that such conditions are ate teaching professor of tant topic. " such as developmental souri chapter of the March every single occurrence managed and the woman is nursing at the University The Missouri Task delays, chronic respiratory of Dimes, the rate of pre- of prematurity and infant as healthy as possible." of Missouri - St. Louis Force was created through problems, vision problems, mature birth in Missouri mortality, it expects to The Missouri Task College of Nursing was legislation passed by the hearing problems, and is, unfortunately, slightly be' able to reduce the rate Force on Premat~rity and recently appointed by Mis- General Assembly and other health issues. It is above the national aver- by discovering the main Infant Mortality has been souri Governor Jay Nixon then signed into law by the leading cause of death age, which was measured causes of the problem and raising awareness of the to the Missouri Task Force Governor Jay Nixon. It is among newborns in the at a'rate of 12.1 percent in providing methods of pre- issue through a variety of on Prematurity and Infant the state of Missouri's pro- U.S.," Kendig said. 2010. vention to allow for more campaigns. Mortality. active approach to improv- According to Task "Nationally, approxi- heal d';:y pregnancies. "I think that the first "B y- creating a statewide ing the health conditions Force on Prematurity and mately 1l.9 percent of ba- "The factors that affect thing students can do to task force through legisla- of infan ts, children and Infant Mortality, one of bies are born prematurely. prematurity and infant address this issue is to take tion, the state of Missouri, . their mothers, all of whom every eight babies is born In Missouri, approximately mortality are very COffi- care of their own health . is making a strong state- have been overlooked prematurely and seven 12.2 percent of our babies plex, and we don't fully Many of our students ment about our commit- concerning the issues of babies per 1,000 succumb are born prematurely, " understand all of the fac- are of childbearing age ment to the health and prematurity and infant to infant mortality in Kendig said. "We are striv- tors that can contribute and may already have well-being of families in mortality. The ultimate Missouri. In addition to ing to reduce this number to these problems. For families or be planning to Missouri," Susan Kendig, goal of the program is to humane issues, financial to 9.6 percent by the year instance, some women may start families in the near associate teaching profes- reduce Missouri's preterm burdens are added to the 2020. Some areas of Mis- have medical problems be- future," Kendig said. "So it sor of nursing, UMSL, birth and infant mortality state due to the issue of souri, including pockets of fore and during the preg- is important for us to take said. "The March of Dimes rates any way it can. premature birth, regarding St. Louis, have areas where nancy that can influence charge of our health, be was instrumental in the ('A premature birth is the fact that those prema- prematurity and infant early delivery," Kendig aware of health issues that creation of this Task Force one that occurs before ture babies are more likely mortality rates are even said. "These can often be . can affect pregnancy out- and passage of this legisla- 38 weeks of pregnancy. to have developmental dis- higher than the national addressed if women obtain come, and make lifestyle tion.) and they should be Premature birth can abilities and other health average. ", health care both before and choices that help us to be commended for their hard lead to long-term health problems. A1 though the Missouri during pregnancy to assure a.s healthy as possible."

The UNDERCURRENT by Jarred Gastreich "W hat methods do you use to study for finals?"

"I tend to wait until the Kristin Blum "I take a nap in the Becky Obenhaus "I get distracted very Emily Gogel night before the test, read Senior evening so that I can stay Senior easily, so study groups Junior. over my notes, freak out Graphic Design up until the morning. It's Graphic Design help me a lot. Flash cards Graphic Design a bit, then go to bed at a not easy to study during are a necessity for art decent time." the day when you work." history." 4 I 'l:hc lturrrntl DECEMBER 5, 201' I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I NEWS . Undergrad student research program available this spring

Research Teams Initiative to be enacted;commu­ nication research project boom expected spring.'12

BADIA EAD Staff Writer

The Department of Teams Initiative provides this is sotnethlng students Communication hopes to many benefits and oppor­ should know," Heisel said. begin the Research Teams tunities for undergraduate But participation in The Initiative, designed to pro­ students. Research Teams Initiative mote student participation "For a student who by undergraduate students in communication research thinks he or she might could be invaluable. at the graduate and under­ want to go on to graduate "These types of achieve­ graduate level, as early as school, having a research­ ments open doors and DECEMBER 7th­ spring 2012. project under your belt is a present opportunities. Jiomeless in the City "The idea is to have huge asset. A student who Don't underestimate the Dr.~argaretSherraden a small group of under­ panicipates in a research value of applying the sci­ graduate students 'working team project might end entific method to ommu­ together on a project that up presenting their find­ nication-it will inevitably will develop their research ings at the Undergraduate de elop critical thinking skills. In collaboration with Research S~'mposium here anal:'sis and problem- olv­ a graduate student in com­ on campus, at a profes­ ing skills," Heisel said. munication, the under­ sional conference or, in Students who intend (0 graduates w·ould develop some cases, publishing their take pan in the initiative research questions and study in a peer-reyiewed will C\'cntually be required select appropriate methods journal," Heisel said. to complete COMf\ f 3330: to test them," Dr. Alan There have always been Communication Research . Heisel, associate professor, opportunities for un­ Methods I as a prerequisite, chairperson, department of dergraduate students to but initially, undergradu­ communication, said. participate through super­ ate students will be chosen Although student teams vised research, and those by recommendations and will conduct the research opportunities are usuall:­ student interest. study, Heisel says that fac­ through a course designed "For the pilot, recom­ ulry will provide guidance for credit. But there have mendations from the un­ at all stages. been drawbacks. dergraduate research faculry "Faculty will oversee the "Over the years, this ap­ will identih- students who process to insure viability proach has been successful, excelled in the course and and to facilitate project ap­ providing many students invite them (0 participate. proval by the Institutional with a great opportunity Of course, it never hurts to Review Board (IRB). Once to work one-on-one with express an interest. There approved, the research team faculty on research projects. is a level of competence we will collect data, conduct Unfortunately, the num­ want, but motivation has preliminary analys.es and ber of projects that faculty a lot to do with student draw conclusions about the can oversee is limited, and potential," Heisel said. research questions ( ... ) The many students never knew Heisel says what the research team will be ex­ that it might be an option," project will look like pected to present their find­ Heisel said. remains to be seen, but he ings to the faculty when the The Research Teams Ini­ has high hopes. project is complete," Heisel tiative does not offer credit. "Of course, we hope that "Because the course participating on the re­ St.Louis. ~ said. Heisel says that because would not be considered search team will be viewed UMSL does not have a doc­ pan of the regular teaching as the same type of achieve­ PublicRado toral program in communi­ load, anyone working with ment as being inducted in cation, faculty can at least the research teams would Lambda Pi Eta (the UMSL 90.7 K give promising students a be donating their time and chapter of the Honor Soci­ chance to cultivate their talent. At a point when ev­ ety of the National Com­ talents and compete at any eryone is being asked to do munication Association)," A Service of The University of Missouri-St. Louis institution. The Research more with less, I think that Heisel said. NEWS I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I 'Q[h( ([urrent I 5 Scott Perkins accepts ational Alliance on entail Illness of Southwestern Missouri's Excellence in Government Award.

ALADEEN KLONOWSKI Staff Writer

In Missouri. suicide rates, Jordan with 1.1 Sr. Louis and the Missouri really needs to be a team support of legislation presentations, depression is the fourth leading percent in 2009; so the Department of Mental effort, bringing in others efforts, developing new screenings and support cause of death for people US falls somewhere near Health. such as friends or family program or improving groups for survivors." between the ages of ten the middle. The suicide The M issouri Suicide members, a counselor and access to treatment - and Suicide and its warning and 53, according ro the rate in the United States Prevenrion Project "has clergy." for all his efforts in the signs should not be faced Missouri Depanmenr of was 11.84 per 100,000 in trained over 50,000 people According to The suicide prevenrion project alone. There is a lot M enral Healrh. Of these 2008. ro serve as 'gatekeepers' American Foundation for over the years, we felt it of information on the age ranges, the highest Scott Perkins is working in their communities and Suicide Prevention, 90 most appropriate that Scott internet and it can be hospitalization rate is for to chang those statistics. help recognize persons percent of people who should receive this award," oyerwhelming to those 15 ro 19-year-olds. In As the project director at risk of suicide and die by suicide have a Denise i\Iills, president, unprepared for such an the United States, nearly of the M issouri Suicide refer them ro help," SCOtt diagnosable and treatable National Alliance on intense subject. If you are six times as many men as Pre\enrion Project Perkins, Project Director, psychiatric disorder. Mental Illness St. Louis worried about someone women benveen 20 and 24 he recently received r...1issouri Institute of Training people to chapter, said. "Since 2008, in your life, a good place die by suicide, according the a ti nal Alliance .tYlenral Health, said. recognize warning signs this state-\\-ide program to start looking for help to the National Institute on Mental Illness of "\Vhen a friend or 10\ c: J is a logical step to\vard has helped thousands and information can be of \1.:nral Health, and Southwe tern i ouri's one is suicidal, it is prevention. of individuals learn the at a community or state about 11 nonfatal suicide Ex elle nce in Governmenr imporran t ro involve others 1,fI's Excellence in warning signs and ways to level so YOll can see what attempts occllr for every Award. The issouri and not try ro handle G overnment Award is assist someone in crisis. your neighbors are doing death. Suicid Prevention Project everything. Evc :1 when given "ro the individual In addition to offering to help prevent suicide. C ompared to the highest is a collaboration of the YOll are concerned about or group who has free gatekeeper training For more information suicide rate, Lith uania iss uri Institute of someone, it's im ?o s~ ible ro contributed to the on suicide prevention, on the !v1issouri Suicide with 31.5 perc\:nt in 2009, M ental H alrh ar the be there around the clock p itive advancement of [Perkins] encourages other Prevention Project, they and one of the I west U niv rsity of Missouri - ro look Out for them. It the mentally ill through services such as educational can be found on Facebook.

sode *o

presents: STUD T CHO CE ME US Build Your Own Pasta Bowl Kansas City BBQ Build Your Own Rice Bovll Fajita Bar AM' All Day Philly Cheesesteak Bar Chicagoland Taco Bar .Fish Fry January 17th through the 27th students can vote on food choices for next semester. The top 5 selections will be ran throughout the Spring semester. This is your chance to have a say in what you eat so don't miss out on this opportunity! We'll post indivual menus in the MSC so you can see what will be on each menu! sodexo Vote on facebook at facebook.com/SodexoUMSL o&k 6 I ~hr [:UITcnt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I WHAT'S CURRENT Your weekly calendar of campus events. IlWhat's Current" is a free service for student organizations. Submissions must be turned in by 5 p.m. the Thursday before publication; first-come, first-served. Listings may be edited for length and style. E-mail event listings to [email protected], with the subject IIWhat's Current." No phone or written submissions. . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A rep-roduction of Da Vinds invention, the puliey system, is on display at the Da Vinci Machi nes Exhibit in downtown St. Louis. NIKKI VAH LE J THE CURRENT

Mass an d soup Tai Chi Qigong practice From 5:3 0 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. Located at the Catholic ewman Center an d ope n to all. From 12:00 p.m. to 12:30 p.m. Located in 202 JC Penney Center and open to UMSL. Every Tuesday we have 5:30 p.m. Mass here at the Newm an Center in our living room . All are This Qigong s·ession is a blending of meditation, breathing and slow, fluid movements incorpo­ wel com e. We are a friendly group and would love to see yo u. Th e ass is ve ry relaxing, so you rated into a 30-minute set with an emphasis on the bre?thing. The practice is free and open to shoul d check it out if you need some qual ity tim e with God. Also, we have a sim ple but deli­ all UM SL faculty, staff and students. It is suitable for people of all sizes, ages and fitness levels. cious mea l of homemade soup and bread ava ilable after Mass. No previous experience or special cloth ing is needed. For more information, call Rachelle Sirn8n at 3 4-385-54 55. For more information, call linda Gatson at 314-516-5091.

Gettting to know grants IC short course - file management From 9:30 a.m. to 11:30 a.m . Located in 229 JC Penney Bu il ding and open to faculty/staff. Starts at 11 :00 a.m. Located in SSB 202 and open to UMSL. There vvill be a review of the financial reports in PeopleSoft Web Applications that should be This course is designed to teach you the basic beginning steps of how to organize, save and used for grants. We would also like to introduce our newest staff members, as well as give you access your files on a Windows-based PC that may be required- for classes, your job or your own an update on other chances in our office. computing purposes. For more information, call Karen Boyd at 314-516-5923. Topics Included: Qrganizing Windows Live Email, backing up data, properly organizing files and folders, etc. For more informati-on, contact Instructional Computing Staff.

Study party From 11 :00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. Located in the MSC Century Rooms and open to all. . With finals coming up, life is getting more and more stressful. The last thing you should have to worry about is where you or your group will study. Come join UPB for four hours of study madness! During this event, two Century Rooms will be reserved (one for quiet study and one for group study). These rooms will be joined in the middle by a'snack bar with free snacks promoting brain power and concentration . . For more information, call Scott Morissey at 314-516-5531. neYa! Matt King, Shailene WOlldley as Alexandra and Amara Miller as Sconie. in Th Descendants' is tro ble in paradise and headed for Oscar

CATE MARQUIS A&E Editor does not mean their lives are increasingly sassy and big parcel of undeveloped Krause) in tow. world around them is untouched by life's tragedy difficult. Meanwhile Matt Hawaiian land but changes The story has the gorgeous, as is the polished - ~cer, poverty, trash and and his wife have drifted in the law are forcing them absurdity that real life often cinematography. If this film George Clooney gives urban decay. apart, with Ellzabeth to sell. has, where tragedy is no does not make you long to the best performances of his "The Descendants" spending much of her Their parcel of land shield against the il1:trusion visit Hawaii, it is not clear career in "The Descendents," features very real people in time engaged in risky sport represents the largest, of banal problems. It is the what would. a drama/comedy from real-life situations. Like activities. last remaining piece of total believability of Matt "The Descendants" "Sideways" writer/director "Sideways," situations that In fact, the film opens undeveloped land in the and his daughters and their is :6lled with great Alexander Payne about a sound like pure drama often wi th footage of Patricia islands. Since it is the relationship that makes this performances and features Hawaiian family. The film is have absurd, even comic Hastie as Elizabeth King legacy of Hawaiian royalty, film work as both drama a great script. But what will the leading contender to win elements, just as they do in reveling in the thrill of a everyone he meets seems and comedy. really stick with viewers is big in Oscar gold. realllfe. speedboat ride, creating an to feel they have the right Like "Sideways," this how real these people are George Clooney stars as Matt King describes image of an active risk-taker to tell Matt what the King story is peppered with and the unexpected humor Matt King, a man coping himself as the "back-up that lingers in the mind family ought to do with it. colorful characters and and touching moments with caring for his two parent," who concentrated throughout the film. The American wonderful performances. in this wholly real-world daughters after a boating on his law practice while While King is coping missionaries and Hawaiian Elizabeth's doting, story. The story has lessons accident puts his wife in a leaving the raising of their with his personal tragedy, royalty Story is a central .combative elderly father of both sticking together coma. At the same time, two daughters to his wife. he is faced with resolving one in Hawaii history. (Robert Forester) clearly as a family and being true King's family is debating Things in Matt's family a thorny land issue. King's While the film alludes to it resents Matt, while his to oneself, wrapped in selling a large chunk had not been going well extended 'family are the briefly, mostly this is a more daughter could do no the most charming and of land they inherited even before the accident. descendents of a Hawaiian personal story of this family. wrong. Beau Bridges is . appealing of packages. There as descendants of both Rebellious 17 -year-old princess, one of the last Elizabeth's coma reveals marvelous as Matt's cousin could hardly be a better Hawaiian royalty and daughter Alex (Shailene descendents of the great some unpleasant facts about Hugh, a long-haired man @m for a season that brings American missionaries. Woodiey) had been sent King Kamehameha, and her, setting Matt off on in a flowered shirt whose families together. As Clooney's Matt tells us off to a boarding school, the son of American a quest for answers with laid-back manner conceals a near the film's start, living in while ten-year-old Scottie missionaries. The family Scottie, Alex and Alex's more calculating mind. Grade: A a beautiful place like Hawaii (Amara Miller) has become holds in a joint trust the last stoner friend Sid (Nick Of course, the physical 8 1:hf Q1}ITrnt . DECEMBER 5, 2011 WWW.THECURRENT- Looking for that special LATEST + GREATEST OPENING FRIDAYT DECEMBER 9: word? Try "Word Power" THE SITTER (everywhere) - A comedy starring Jonah Hi/las a college student pressed intQ5ervice as a babysit- or "Wage lave's Glossary" ter. Also stars Sam Rockwell. . . NEW YEAR'S EVE (everywhere) - An ensemble cast of stars, weaving various NYC stories of New Year's Eve in the ALADEEN KLO OWSKI style of last year's 'rVafentine's Day. n Stars Sarah Jessica Parker, JessJf:a 8ei! and Ashton Kutcher. Directed by Garry M arshall. . Staff Writer

The books "The a word may function as. are wishing there were PASSIONE: A MUSICAL ADVENTURE (Tivoli) Wageslave's Glossary" by This may frustrate English two of you this year at the - A fanciful, playful documenta0" narrated by actor john Tl.(rturro, about'themusi- Joshua Glenn and Mark majors in particular. When Christmas party, one [0 get cal heritage of Naples, Italy. Kingwell and "Word Power" dealing with a defined word all the presents and one by John Fleming would from another language, it is to deal with the "when I PENING FRIDAY, DECEMBER 16: be excellem additions [0 helpful [0 know its uses. was your age, I'd already the coffee tables of writers, "Everybody knows a graduated," your double MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE: GHOST PROTOCOL (lMAX screens only; opens philosophers, politicians and brown-noser when they would be called your verywhere 12/21) . satirists alike. see one. But how about "doppelganger." Tom Cruise continues his action heroics in this new installment of his spyl Together they effectively a freeter? A jack? Can Alternately, if you would etion series, whose title derives from a, clever '60s-spy tv show. Also stars represent what a collection they tell downsizing like to impress you dad eremy Renner. of defined words can say from greybearding or with corporate jargon that about not only the author, brightsizing?" reads a blurb will utterly befuddle him HERLOCK: A GAME OF SHADOW S (everywhere) but the purchaser of the on the back of "The Wage into not asking about your - The second re-imagined Sherlock Holmes tale, starring Robert Downey Jr. book as well. Slave's Glossary." job market prospects as a s Holmes and Jude Law as Watson, from director Guy Ritchie. "Word Power" is not Did you know glossaries communications major, the kind of book a person could possess political you might throw out a OUNG ADULT (everywhere) reads from cover to cover for leanings? If you are feeling sentence such as, "Due Comedy from /I Juno" scriptwriter Diablo Cody and director Jason Reitman pleasure but it is a book that put out by the economy or to a great number of my bout a hard-drinking writer of young adult series novels (Charlize Theron) will remain useful long after your personal daily grind, predecessors in the field of eturns to her small home town bent on rekindling a romance with her high · one has made it through any pull this book out of the communications P**ing chool boyfriend (Patrick Wilson), who is now married and with a new baby. Judi Picoult novel. A writer back of your desk drawer the dog, not to mention and have a laugh at Glenn incredible improvements looking for inspiration PENING DECEMBER 21·25: need only thumb through and Kingwell. With startling to the technological aspects Fleming's "dictionary of satire and a plethora of pop of the job market, not to HE GIRL WITH A DRAGON TATTOO (everywhere) fascinating and learned culture references 'from Star mention the massively David Fincher directs this English-language re-make of hit Scandinavian words and phrases" to find Wars to Pink Floyd, this growing army of freelancers thrillers, based on bestselling books. Stars Daniel Craig and Rooney Marq. a concept worth exploring. glossary is sure to emerrain. taking over the positions It would also make for "The \Vage Slave's once held by full-timers, INKER. TAILOR, SOLDIER, Spy (everywhere) excellen t kaffeeklatsch, a Glossary" suffers from the at far below flint rates Adaptation of John LeCarre's complex bestsellif)g Cold War spy thriller, German word that means same downfall as "Word demanded by those of us Ireadya big hit in Britain. Gary Oldman heads up anal/-star British cast "conversation over coffee." Power" in that it does not v.rith degrees, my chances ·ncluding Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, John Hurt, Toby Jones Every person should be give the parts of speech, would seem slim, although concerned with expanding but it seems [0 take itself I certainly do not intend AR HORSE (everywhere) their vocabulary, and this much less seriously. A few to spend this time in Steven Spielberg presents a young adult tale of a poor British boy and his 232-page collection of of the entries feel more like funemploy:ment." orse against the backdrop of World War I. Stars Benedict Culbertson, Tom anecdotes than definitions If you or a loved one oddities will make doing so iddleston, . ' much more interes ~g than so if you are looking for is a lexophile, or lover of flipping through the goliath the cold, clipped language cryptic wO-rds according to HE ARTIST (everywhere) that is the Oxford English usually present in a glossary, urbandictionary.com, then - A clever, entertaining mix of action, comedY, romance and old movie triCks D ictionary. you will not find it here. these two books would in a story about a silent movie action-co!11edySt?r the to ' The only complaim this It also does not have make great stocking snillers. resi~ting ch~(lge ~ ound films. Starring John -Goodman and ~ ....(who prev;ousJyspdofeaJames:' reviewer has is that "Word pronunciation key. Bond) and shot on location in old Ho/lywood. ' .... . '.~ . . ' Power" does not give the "Word Power" will let Grade: B various parts of speech that HE ADVENTURES Of T-INTIN: SECRETOF THE ~ UNICORN (evel¥where) . - Spielberg's seconcj hoHday offering is a rollicking animated' version of the .Iassic Tin Tin comics, thafplays a bit like a kid's Indiana' Jones. '

IN THE LAND OF BLOOD AND HONEY (everywhere) - This Angelina Jolie-directed film about the Bosnian war caused much uproar during filming. A Serbian man and Bosnian woman once attracted to each other meet again during the war. A& EI I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 InC ~t I 9 Tyrese return to his fi rst Martin Hayes and Dennis Cahill love with 'Open I nvitaf 0 ' bring "Celtic Festival" to Touhill

ENDEA WILBERT DAVID VON NORDHEIM Staff Writer St aff \Nriter

On Saturday, November musicians and dancers The same applies to Cahill After a five-year break, 19 me Irish dance and . from Irish Arts, was the who, although humbly Grammy-nominated folk music community of more tormal and traditional resigned to his supponing musician Tyrese has St. Louis showcased the of the performances, as role, practiced a fascinating, return c.:: d (0 his first love centuries-strong musical evidenced by both the minimalistic finger-picked with his lates t album, tradition of [he Celtic impressive coordination of guitar style mat allowed "Open Invitation." culture vvith an eKceptional dance and music and the him complete control over Tyrese is now considered peItormance at the Touhill remarkable skill and reserve the minutest sound of every a triple threat after veering Performing }\rts Center. of the performers. The suing. His insistence on away from music to The Celtic Festival company included several pitch perfection became a pursue ~1nd dominate in concert, sponsored by generations of performers running joke during me acting and modeling. H e ni ersi of M issouri's in its numbers (and even pedormance as Hayes ribbed starred in films such as Center for International an UMSL professor), Cahill for his obsessive and "2 Fast 2 Furious" and Studi and arranged by' St. \".. ho wove through several methodical tuning between "Transforme rs." Tyrese (Ook Louis Irish Arts, fc:atured beautiful compositions pieces, warning the audience his career to new heights virtlloso fiddle player featuring the fiddle ketde mat Cal1iil's parallel parking "'ith his self-help book tided and orld-renm ned fol k drum, accordion and more was just as neurotic. "Ho'" !:O Get Out of Your musician Martin Hayes alongside impeccabl;' Hayes W'as nothing Own Way," and he is now a and equally gifted guitarist choreographed interludes of short of a delight. Like the New York Times bestselling Dennis Cahill in a truly traditional step dancing. The most gifted of performers, author. One might think br athtaking performance. performance had [he same Celtic or otherwise, he has there was no time for Tyrese The concert also included an air of kinship and familiariry a warm, bubbly personality to put tOgether sllch a impressive ensemble of the as an impromptu talent always handy \vith a quip masterpiece with his busy center's gifted students and show at a family gathering, or anecdote for lulls in the schedule. However, on track alumni of Irish Arts. becoming a heartfelt performance. These included eight of "Open Invitation," uncompromising music which Trese gives reverence Altl10ugh it would testimony to the endurance a great anecdote about Tyrese boasts, "I make it can ·till be made and that to God and thanks him have been a rewarding of the Irish culture miles performing for the president look tOo easy," a statement 'love songs' are not dead. for his many blessings. He experience (0 see musicians from its native source. ('Although I have nothing that the triple threat has H e returns to his roots of also says a prayer for his of thi ' caliber under By comparison, Hayes but respect for the man's earned the right to make. soulful, heartfelt melodies listeners, praying that they any' circumstances. the and Cahill's performance leadership qualities, he'd \x1ith "Open Invitation" ,:·i th tracks such as "Stay," embrace change and \\·alk dedication of these was a much more casual best leave the Irish dancing being the first album "Nothing on You" and "Best into [he "unfamiliar. " He performers in sharing their affair but no less stunning. to the professionals") released on his own label, of Me." Howe\:er, it is track states that "faith is climbing rich heritage offered a Hayes, a fixture in the Celtic which inspired his original Voluon Records. Tyrese was in 1.\ "Angel," produced in i ible stair , ' encouraging unique perspective to the folk musk community composition "Reel for determined to pour his heart by R. T... ~dl~ , that Tyrcse's his listeners (0 have faith TouhiU's expanding roster of and a legend in his native Barack Obama." and soul Out on each record. emotions ~tnd sincerity in their dreams, no matter world mllsic pertormances. It Ireland, was an absolute As Hayes name-checked "Open Invitation" are poured Out the most how things may eem. provided an experience that spectacle. Taking to his St. Louis' premier Irish debuted in the tOp ten of and it feel s like the 1990s "Walk" " as a different type was educating, entertaining fiddle witl1 a biblical fury, he pubs between pieces to Billboard's top 200 album again, when artists actually of inspiration and it is no and truly e -hilarating. burned through brilliantly the audiences' cheers and chart this week and is also sang their hearts out about wonder that his self-help The dramaricall;r difierent arranged medleys of laughter, it was clear that the number one R&B something meaningful. book has done so '.veil. approaches these performers traditional Irish tunes and this County Clare native album on iTunes and the Tyrese shows his sensual side "Open Invitation" is an took in exploring the musical folk songs. Accompanied by found a home away from number nvo R&B album with tracks such as "One album that you can put in, heritage of their collective Cahill on the guitar, Hayes home on tvIissouri River in the country. Tyrese Night" and "Make Love" press play and listen to the cultural history presented demonstrated a truly jaw­ soil. It was uuly as powerful announces he is back on the and proves to younger artists whole way through. There a stirring exploration of dropping mastery of his a testament to the strength first track, ''I'm Home." He that their lyrics do not have are no Buff or filler tracks the richness and depth of instrument. He showcased and importance of the Celtic gives his appreciation to his to be lewd (0 be accepted or that some artists add just traditional Irish music. the uniquely improvisation­ uadition as the concert itself. fans at the end of the song, appreciated by listeners. to get a full album. Each The evening's first heavy bent of his stating, "I just want to say To make the album record exudes the hard work performance, featuring performance, a rarity in most Grade: B+ thank you to all my fans appeal to people who enjoy that Tyrese has put into it. a talented troupe of traditional Celtic music. who kept my music alive. more upbeat tempos or Tyrese openly invites us to You never gave your heart "club bangers," the album experience a piece of him away to anybody else. I just has uacks such as "I Gotta and it is an invitation worth appreciate you. I'm here to Chick" (Rick Ross) and accepting. stay, I'm home." "Too Easy" (Ludacris). The For the rest of the album ends with a poetry Grade: A album Tyrese shows that · piece tided "Walk," in Wale imp esses fans with second album, "Ambition"

OWEN SHROYER Spo~ts Editor

It has been (\'10 years The true feel of the album "Ambition," which may be since Wale debuted his hip­ is consistent with what Wale the best song on the album. hop career with "Attention provided with attention If there is any example of Deficit," which left fans deficit, defiant arrogance. inspired rap music, this is it. arDUOUS for Wale ro get back The first song on the album This song is smooth, but goes in the studio. His first album is entitled "Don't Hold hard. Wale's ambition indeed created a large buzz, and he Your Applause." It is a solid shows. changed his record label to opening song for the album, Anytime hip-hop fans see l\'laybach Music Group and -letting listeners know \Y/ale the name of familiar artist

Warner Brothers Records is sticking [0 his style and Kid Cudi on a track, they get for his second album release, attitude, as he says "Don't ever excited. No doubt Cudi and '~'\.mbition." hold your applause for me" as \Vale deliver with "Focused." '~Ambition" was released a woman's voice is played high This is the first time Wale and on N'ovember 1. It p'eaked at over a snare drum. The song Kid Cudi had been in a studio number one in the United even features the lyric "no rogether ro record a track since States on both me Billboard days off," which was Wale's 2009 for Kid Cudi's de bur Top R&B/Hip Hop and Top morto during the recording of album "Is There Any Love."

Rap Albums, and number (\¥o "Ambition." After a falling our, the [WO on the Billboard 200. The second uack of the pur th~ir differences behind The onl single from song is "Double M Genuis," [hem and got back rogether ro the album, "Lorus Flower again sugge"'ting \Vale's make a great track. "Focused" Bomb," vvas released October arrogance. He open the song has huge bass, with a solid 21 . "Lotus Flower Bomb," by saying, ''I'm trying to tell hip-hop groove. This song, in featuring .r,,1igue1, is an mem that I am one of the best a way, perfectly personifies intimate, smooth R&B song thinkers of this class I'm in." Wale and Cudi's feelings, with high vocals from lvfiguel Then producers Mark Henry showing that they are on [Op as the refrain and Wale and EhDuhSueatZ drop a of the hip-hop world right rapping lyrics of seduction in fat beat for \Vale to ,up O\'(:"r now, and they "gotta keep at the chorus. It is an interesting one of the best :,; ongs on the it, gotta stay focused." choice for the single, as \X'ale album. Wale has truly made is not kIlO\Vn for his se:h.'Y \Xlale continues the pattern himself a stable in the hip­ R&B. Ir is also surprising as it of getting huge names to be hop world with this album.

does not represent the album featured on his albums, with He is good [0 his fans, and

all that well, since there is Rick Ross on tvvo songs, Ne­ dedicated [0 his work. Expect

only one similar song on the Y'o, Lloyd and Kid Cudi all [0 be hearing the name \'Vale a albwn, "Illest Bitch," which featured on "Ambition." Rick lot more in the hip-hop/R&BI fearures only \'Vale's vocals. Ross is featured on the song rap world .

For or reViews,• t c .8 I i ©PHOTO BY WOOLSEY Rep 's 'Adventure of Tom Sawye ' captures fun of Twain boyhood through December 23. children and adults. Adams hoping to conce-a! that he has Becky, the rest characters are moving walls and suspended CATEMAR UIS In recent years, the Rep appears in costume as one of spent the day playing hooky. played by an ensemble cast windows. One of the cleverest A&E Ed itor has presented musicals for the story's characters, rather All three actors in the lead in multiple roles. The story's piece of staging is for the Mark Tv/aill's remembrance its holiday production. than as Twain, and returns roles of Tam, Huck and Beck-y villain, the resentful, vengeful church scenes, where the cast of his ivlissouri boyhood, "The Thankfully, "The Adventures periodically to help the story bring considerable fun and Injun Joe is played ""ith great sits among large prop dolls Adventures of Tom Sa\vyer," of Tom Sawyer" is not a along and sprinkle in more of energy to their characters. stage presence by Michael anchored to the benches remains an entertaining musical but a clever, high- or. They spring to life as D. Nichols, who also plays serving as pews. The cast adventure tale for both spirited play. There is no , er (Tim everyday kids, capruring boys' the teacher and the preacher members operate the dolls adults and children. Despite need to interrupt Twain's ) has inadvertently timeless interest gross sruff with deLicious humor. Besides like puppets, nodding heads the passage of time, Twain humor and adventure tale away the school day and every kid's imaginative serving as narrator, Joseph or leaning in ro each other completely captured the sense with unnecessary songs of swimming - again - his small play and sense of adventure. Adams plays bad-luck drunk or away to whisper gossip. of childhood in many ways. questionable merit. Missouri town on the banks McKiernan's Tom is full of Muff Potter and other towns The effect is both funny and at child, or adult recalling Childhood fun and of the Mississippi. Rushing bravura and a confidence people. Justin Fuller plays effective. ildhood, sulking after some advenrure are the themes of to arrive home with the in his ability to talk his way Torn's less daring pal Joe "The Adventures of Tom ebuke, would not relish the this delightful production. other kids after school he our of every difficulty. Tann's Harper and Nate Trinrud Sawyer" is a fine choice for antasy of disappearing for a The play draws from the encounters his friend Huck Huck is a charming urchin, plays ill-fated Doc Robinson family fun, enjoyable for ew days and having the whole timelessness of childhood, Finn (Robbie Tann), a ragged full of folk lore about curing in addition to Sid and various adults and kids alike. The play eighborhood looking for with the characters played social outcast who does not warts as he willingly follows others. is presented at the Loretto us. Reappearing at one's own as real people rather than bother with school, and new Tom's lead. But Tann's The play is fast-paced and Hilton Theater on the Webster funeral to tearful embraces stiff nostalgic icons. The girl in town Becky Thatcher Huck also has a melancholy delightfully entertaining as University campus, 130 Edgar l0nlY cap' the triumph. naturalness makes the story (Hayley Treider), who floors undercurrent of awareness of directed by Jeremy B. Cohen. Road in Webster Groves. "The Adventures of Torn more contemporary and the Tom at first sight - at least evil unfamiliar to the more Scenic designer Daniel Their website www.repstl.org Sawyer," playwright Laura production more lively. as long as none of the other sheltered Tom. Treider plays Ostling's moveable, pared- has information on student Eason's energetic adaptation The play opens with a boys are watching. Tom races . Becky with a wide-eyed down set serves as everything discounts, rush tickets and ofTwain's classic, is the narrator, Joseph Adams, home to Aunt Polly (Nance sweetness that makes her from the white-washed wall, sho~ times. Repertory Theater of St. Louis' quoting Twain on his Williamson) and his too-good character irresistible. to the graveyard, co two current Mainstage production intention to entertain both brother Sid (Nate Trinrud) Apart from Tom, Huck and story houses with a series of Grade: B+ 12 I ~£ ~rrrnt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I FEATURES Jim Brickman "Holiday Celebration" concert kicks off season of cheer at ·Touhill .Performing Arts Ce ter ASHLEY ATKINS Features Editor

Over the weekend, she called out to her while college students fellow Brickheads, who were still recovering from cheered her in recognition. the mental drain of Black Brickman walked into the Friday or working off spodiglu that was waiting the extra calories from a for him at the corner of fantastic Thanksgiving the stage, took a seat at his feast, Jim Brickman decided black Yamaha piano and, to grace the elegan t stage with a single spot beaming of the Anhesuer Busch down on him from the top Theatre in the Blanche of the stage, began to pIa:,. Touhill Performing Arts He played a couple of Center. He was not alone knov,rn Christmas tunes in the premiere of his 2011 before introducing his "Holiday Celebration" longtime friend Tracy rour, for he also brought Silverman and his one-of­ along his closest friends a-kind yellow six-string and guests, Anne Cochran, electric violin. Silverman, Tracv Silverman and ex­ a true showman, started NFL and Super Bowl off modest in his playing, champion Ben Utecht. then made the switch to Attendees from all of rockstar violinist. The St. Louis came to the men in the crowd who event on November 26, may have been uncertain taking up over half of the about their attendance .Millennium Student Center at the performance were parking lot at the University suddenly struck speechless of Missouri-St. Louis. as Sih'erman incorporated According to the Weather a bit of rock music inro Channel, this was of the the Christmas songs. coldest nights of the week Occasionally, he did a little with a drop in temperature, jig with his ·leg. An older rain, and possible snow, gentleman in the front but that did not keep row threw up the metal "Brickheads" away from this sign. If not for a planned get-together. A get-together set list, it is certain that is a perfect way to describe Silverman would have had such an event to which no problem morphing the families came to bask in Christmas celebration into · the glory of the Christmas a celebration of rock gods. spirit. As focus returned to While waiting for the Jim Brickman and the shmv to stan, the audience celebration of the season, had their own private he introduced his second discussions in the hallways guest, Anne Cochran. An and took advantage of established singer herself, the beverage bar 'and the Cochran and Brickman souvenir table. Some guests had gotten their start Jim Brickman played at the Blanche Touhill PeJfonning Arts Center on November 26. Photo cour­ were so excited for me show together by winning a song tesy f Jim Brickman that they did not dare leave contest in their hometown their assigned seating. when they were in high showdown with Ben dance, why can't they sing? each different Christmas head, he looked like the As the lights began to school together. Taking a Utecht. It was hysterical Cochran and Utecht's best song. The overall set was character Schroeder from flicker to warn lingering stroll down memory lane> watching both artists fight stage collaboration was relaxing to look at. the classic comic strip. guests that the show was Brickman said that when over how they should end to the song "Noel," when One of the best pans This show in its entirety about to start, DJ Cindy he saw her perform at a the Christmas mash up. Cochran appeared wearing of the show was when worked because it was not Collins of Oldies 103.3 FM tender age, he knew that They made sure to get the ali white, exposing a sense Brickman talked about afraid to expose the basics, appeared on the stage in she would be the perfect audience involved, which of elegance. Her style his inspirations as a young communicate with the her festive red to commence female addition to his one­ gained more applause on complimented the white pianist, which was followed audience, and encourage the start of the show. Not man act. They have been their behalf Ex-NFL player drapery on stage that gave by a demonstration audience participation. hiding her own appreciation co-writing together since. Utecht surprised the crowd the viewer an illusion of a of popular childhood It was definitely a family for the upcoming artist Cochran showed her true with his vocal strength. bedroom or dream world. songs such as "It is Hard affair. . who has graced the Touhill colors after intermission It was not the voice one Multicolored lighting being Green," "Rainbow stage on various occasions, when she had a vocal would expect from an flickered in the background Connection" and "Charlie Gl'ade:A athlete. But if athletes can and changed colors with Brown." As he bowed his FEATURES I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I 1:hc [urrrot I 13 Muslim ·Student Association offers an in ide int Muslim culture ASHLEY ATKINS Features Editor

In the month of No- Hms do not agree with and ing to make the interaction education, said. should get married fast. that she is what he wants. vember, the University of do not support in any way." as comfortable as possible. By participating in the He walked the audi- Syed also revealed that many Missouri - St. Louis' Mus- Also, throughout the "1 found that people experiment, Thomas realized ence through the charac- men secretly dream of being lim Student Association week, the association asked spoke to me more respect- that children are more open teristics that a significant proposed to by a woman as promoted Islamic Awareness for volunteers from female fully throughout the day. and willing to learn while other should possess, such he looked over to the female week. Throughout the week student body to sport the I got less nonsense from adults had problems inquir- as excellent moral character, side of the room. "Ladies, before 'Thanksgiving, they traditional hijab in their ev- people and I felt more ing about the difference. loving attitude, content- do the right thing," Syed conducted various lectures eryday lives. All participants comfortable. I did not feel As the female students ment, naivete, internal said. The room filled with on the subject of Islamic were asked to meet at Mus- the need to cover up," Kelly wrapped up their conver- beauty and fertility in laughter. culture. The student body lim Marriage 101 to express Brewer, senior, anthropol- sation on perception, the women. Syed stressed the The presentation came was offered a chance to their thoughts and reactions ogy, said. speaker for the night, Faizan amount of time that it takes to a close with free Pizza attend lectures on honor to the experiment. "I am a member of a Syed, executive director of to find the "right one." He Hut and beverages for all killings, 1\1uslim marriage As a handful of Muslim Jewish family, so members Care Sr. Louis, was ready to discussed the dos and don'ts participants in the experi- and other subjects. and non-Muslim students of my family already wear present his PowerPoim on of introduction between ment and lecture. Those in ."Tuesday was Islam 101, walked into the Century something similar to this. marriage within the Islamic the opposite sexes. If a man attendance left the event where we talked about what Room, the men gravi- They were thrilled because community. He centered is interested in a woman, with new connections as Islam was, what we prac- tated toward the front of they thought that I had gone his presentation on how then it is considered proper well as a new look on life. ticed, what we believed in. the room, while the woman back to being orthodox. I an animated character on to confide in her friends Islamic Awareness Week I believe we had a segment gathered at the tables in was actually more comfort- the PowerPoint found a or her fanlily and court- has been promoted by the on misconceptions. There the back to discuss the able in it, and my kids were significant other, stating ing is suggested before the association which oper- are quite a few of people wearing of the hijab. There better behaved. I work at that in Islamic culture it is proposal. In Islanlic culture, ates throughout the United who believe that Muslims were a couple of women a school and the class just believed that when one finds a proposal of marriage is States and Canada since the worship a moon god," Molly who decided to shy away seemed· calmer today. I don't their significant other, they made indirectly, through a early 1990s. The idea behind Smith, sophomore, biology, from the discussion table, know if it was just one of have completed half of their friend or a woman can pop the weeklong event is to .cre- MSA secretary, said. "Honor but there were enough will- those days or if they saw religion. Syed said that it is the question. During the ate a better understanding of killings are not a part of ing participants that it was what I was doing and de- an obligation in the com- proposal process, a man Virill the principles and lifestyle of Islam. It is a cultural aspect hardly noticeable. Smith got cided ro be more respectful," munity ro get married and literally take a long look at the Islamic culture and help that most conservative Mus- the conversation starred try- Amanda Thomas, senior, if one is not married, they his love interest ro make sure abolish stereotypes.

University Program Board host tea time of international astes

MAVIS HOLLIS Staff Writer

Last week, the Uni- Students were offered ten Erin Potts, junior, finance, in question. Cafe. ning of the semest~r. She versity Progr~m Board different types of tea from UPB member, said. A tea "I like trying new, During the event, did not hesitate to express hosted an open tea party around the world, each of drinker herself, Potts was different teas. I like try- students took the time to . her future involvement in in the lvfillennium Student which came with their own impressed by the crowd ing what I will or will interact with each other. the organization. Center on the University individual flyer express- that the event was able to not like," Dorian Hall, Not only did they pay As the event came to of ~1issouri - St. Louis's ing their specific coun- draw. As student.s graced graduate, business admin- compliments to the good- a close, UPB asked their North Campus. Modeled tries of origin, steeping the proximity of the tables, istration, said. Hall is a ies that were provided, but guests to comment on after the traditional prac- processes and ingredients, they indulged in the vari- regular tea drinker and they also used the time to what they thought about . tices regarding tea time in along with any traditions ety of teas, along with such had decided to come to discuss the teas that they the event. Guests were also the United Kingdom, this regarding the teas in their traditional tea additions the event when he saw the were already familiar with. given an opportunity to open event took place be- homelands. The flyers also as lemons and the variety setup engulfing the MSC's "We heard about the have their name entered in tween the hours of 5 p.m. expressed how each tea was of sweeteners that were rotunda space. The event event from a member of a raffle for a Kindle Fire. and 6 p.m. UPB members capable of contributing to provided. The organization had gained so much atten- UPB," Damiana McGraw, UPB were pleased with the stationed their tea (abIes the healch of those who was also able to provide its (ion from [he student body freshman, English, said. turnout [hat [hey had got- on the second floor ro- drank it. guests with a little snack that it managed to attract "I enjoy tea, so when I ten for their first UMSL tunda of the MSC, making "We were coming up which complimented the the likes of even the most heard aboU( this event, I tea party. The party was the event accessible to any with ideas for events to particular tea that each committed coffee drinkers, had to attend." McGraw is an interesting twist on col- student or member of the do for the semester and guest had chosen, often dragging them away from familiar with UPB events, leg~ life at UMSL and gave faculty who happened to we decided that most of following traditional cus- their traditional haunt having attended every attendees a needed break be passing by that evening. the members love tea, " toms for the particular tea near the Einstein Bros. single one since the begin- from daily stresses. 14 l1:hc Q)}rrrnt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT~ONlINE.COM I I SPORTS

Confe ence plays opens well for ritons men's basketball OWEN SHROYER Sports Edito l

It has been a long road for as maintaining progress every dished it to Redel, the big man lea.d all scorers with twenty half, but Missouri S&T never rransfer stUdents Long, McCoy the University of Nussouri - St. game. The game started slow nmning the Boor tor the layup. nine points. He has been on let up, and tied the game vvith and Woods has played a major LDuis men's basketball team, with both teams showing signs Drury added four free-throws fire lately and is a'l'er~aing over just llllder ten minutes left, role, as the team is forming one that has tested them of rust, not having pla;;eJ in before the end of the half to cut seventeen points per game this and then took their first lead chemistry every game. McCoy throughout and has certainly a w k Turnovers and missed UMSl5 lead to five. year. since early in the game. With has show his versatility, leading been good E.,'{perience for this layups kept the sCOlin g low The second half featured The Tritons ended their road just under seven minutes left the team in steals and assists, young team full of u·ansfers. early in the game. Troy Long, much bener shooting. It was trip ~aainst l\1issouri S&T, S&T took a two-point lead. while he is second in scoring After splitting their games at senior, liberal studies, a transfer Long who ~oain came out hot and carried much momentum In response, McCoy hit a and third in rebounds. Woods the Owensboro Classic, the student from Southern Illinois with an early steal, as \veil as \·'lith a two game wining streak three-pointer to regain the lead is leading the team in rebollllds team was ready to embark on University who has emerged as (\Vo more three-pointers and a and going ~oainst a struggling and start a gan1e changing run. and Long has emerged as the a stretch of {v/o conference a te-am leader, was ready to go rebound. MSL opened the opponent. With ten minutes UMSL went on an 18-3 run, team's leader playing the most road games, the first confer- at tip, hitting two three-point- half on a 10 to 3 run, setting left in the half, CMSL found and never looked back en route minutes so fur and scoring the ence games of the season, at ers as well 2S getting an assist the pace for the second half themselves up by five. They to a 79-70 victory. most, while facilitating as well Drury and at NUssouri S&T. and a steal early in the first half The Tritons continued to add would eA'tend their lead after a A lot of questions have been with twenty assists. Drury was 4-2 heading into The bucket seemed to open up to their lead down the stretch, quick sewn to two run, indud- aDS\yTIed since the start of The team now comes home the match up, averaging nearly a bit after the game was tied and never trailed at any point. ing five pointS. a rebound and the season and roles are more for three non-conference 90 points per game, while Nlis- at 15 with eight minutes left. Long went four for four from an assist h-om Long. ill1SL dearly defined now on a team games. They have won their souri S&T struggled at pointS The Tritons then gained the the charity stripe in the closing would gain more momentum that was basically new at the only game at home so far this per game. biggest edge of the game after minUtes of the game. a gODd heading into the break after start. Coach Tappmeyer has year. The team needs to take Head Coach Steve Tapp- an 11 to 3 run, Clpped off by thing for the Tritons to know a dlmk by Charlie Woods, done an e.xcellem job ,vith the advantage of these three games, meyer had the Tritons ready to a bleak by Zach Redel, senior, they can rely on him for dutch jllllior, psychology, on a dish group and has them rolling and gain as much momentum go against Drury; riding a w.we business administration, then free throw·s if needed at the from McCoy. now. The team has scored 80, and chemistry as possible of momentum after a large a fast break by Joshua McCoy, end of a close game. The final UMSL would continue to 78 and 79 points consecutively. before the true brute of the defea.t of Clark Atlanta, as well junior, communications, who score was 78-61 CMSL. Long lead for most of the second The arrival and emergence of conference schedule hits. Tritons cruise in "mprov"ng to three to one with 40 minutes of hell LEON DEVANCE Staff Writer

If the University of Mis- Tennessee to the hit list as 2009 to 2010 season. The with three points and two free-throw line six times and "I was able to hit the open saud - St. Louis Tritons the Tritons pressured the three-game winning streak is rebounds in 30 minutes. connected on three attempts shot, but I was in rhythm women's basketball team is Lady Buccaneers to shoot 40 the Tritons first since begin- Head Coach Lisa Taylor- for 50 percent accuracy. This today. Ever since the fifth to improve on last season's percent from the field . The ning last se-ason on a three- Curtiss attributed the win allowed the Tritons to open grade, in the parks and rec- 10-17 record and win the Lady Buccaneers connected game winni!1g streak. to limiting easy scores for with a 16-4 run beginning reation leagues, I have been Great Lakes Valley Confer- on eight of20 attempts To get the victory over the the Lady Buccaneers in the the second half and stretch· a shooter. I have a quick ence Western Division then and knocked down one free Lady Buccaneers, the Tritons second half a 23-17 half-time lead to a release and I always come its version of 40 minutes of throw on five attempts in rode the combination of "The first half we were 39-21 lead on a jumper in off screens looking at the hell has to playa prominent the first half on the way to a power forward Devonna not solid and were almost the paint by Kiki Robertson, defense to looking to hit the role. 55-37 victory on the ~huck Smith's, junior, sociology, out-rebounded 19-16. We senior, criminal justice, as open shot," Lawrence said. The losses of last season Smith Court before a holiday double-double, 14 points had too many turnovers and they connected on six out With Lawrence hitting the seem to have a carry-over home crowd of 212 cheering and 12 rebounds, two blocks they were able to score in the 10 shots and held the Lady open shot to keep the Lady effect as UMSL finished spectators. and one steal in 27 minutes lane. Once we shut down the Buccaneerss to one field goal Buccaneers at bay, Smith the exhibition season at 0-2 The win had two key and guard/forward Cairlyn lane, we were to able to run during the run. noted that it was easy to losing 92-52 to Illinois State, aspects: it lifted UMSL to a Moody, senior, physical edu- away with it," Curliss-Taylor Curliss-Taylor insisted that concentrate on 'crashing the Missouri State 62-48.They 3-1 record on the season and cation, 14 points, two assists said. Lawrence's ability to shoot boards. also lost .the season opener at the Lady Buccaneers to drop and two steals in 26 min- The Tritons limited the 3-pointers helped. "I like to fight for re- the St. Edward's Classic 88- to 1-3," with UMSL leading utes and Alexis Lawrence's, Lady Buccaneers to a 28 "We got a key conrribu- bounds and trash points. I 79. But then the Tritons de- their rivalry, winning last freshmen, undecided, timely shooting percentage, as. they tion from Alexis. She was feel that rebound is mine. feated Southeast Oklahoma year in Memphis 63-58 and 3:-yoint shooting. The Lady connected on eight shots out pretty steady and that al- This is girls basketball. Most St. 85-76, and McKendree 86-54 in the 2009 to 2010 Buccaneers leading scorer, of the 28 attempts in the lowed us to play better, calm of the time, the referee will College 70-62. season. The Tritons have - Jessica Green, went into the . second half and hit one of down and focus. Then the call foul. But we have got to Now add Christian five straight non-conference contest averaging 14 points six 3-point shots for 16 per- shots started falling," Curliss ~ do a better job in the first Brothers University from home victories since the and 5 rebounds and finished cent. They then went to the Taylor said. half," Smith said. SP ORTS I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I '([he [UITcnt ,I 15 is c - te? .. If 0 , you might be a .' Ie to get a g-reat job with1[hf~Urrcnt ~ The Cur r~n t is looking for: Staff Writers Advert- i: 9 Representatives / Director .taff Photographers nd News Editor. No experience n sary, and we don't bite ... often.

5 are encouraged to apply. We also love jocks.

ut-us/employment/ 16 I '"aChe Q:UIT£nt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I OPINIONS Po /Cou te point

Should retail employees be forced to work on Thanksgiving Day?

Thanksg-ving store open- n retail, orking on Black • I gs an exhibit of se fish r-day and Thanksgivi g c nsumer·sm at its worst goes along with the job

Next holiday season, shop­ someones holiday so chey em else should have to fulloy, suit. Employees should expect working shifts on holidays. them to get a job that doesn't pers should think about some­ open the night before Black Uruorrunat ly consumers are their bosses to want them to Employees should have have that in their schedule. thing other than saving mon Friday and the compan can the OrIes with the pm er; if th .­ come in earlier and ear­ the choice to choose to work The employees have the when they decide whether ()r mak more m ney off of w u d decide to spend th ir man on lierfor Bbck Friday. Biack. Black Friday as overtime, or right to complain, but in not to visit sco res that open on bargain hwlters who get imo Thanksgiving, tore; are going Frida · shopping has always have the choice not to work. choosing a job that does Thanksgi ing. At fust glance, all flSd1ght5 over cwo dollar afRe to open to a mmodate them been a tradition for great Companies usually hire more Black Friday sales every year, of the "door buster' deals and ira and their wallet). earl morning deals as hordes emplo:-ees to help with the they give up the right to get bargains rna' seem attractive While it's true thac compa­ Some rraditions should be of maniacal custOmers rush, rush every year; it ",rould upset over the possibi1ty of but both retailers and shop­ nies should ek t rv their obsen'ed, lest love lose ill collec­ claw and tear for the one give more temporary jobs for having to work on Thanks­ pers need to take a moment to shoppers, me)' also owe ·ome tive humanity and descend e\.en. little item [hat is usually the people looking for employ­ giving night or going into consider the cost of what they're level of understanding to their further imo money-grubbing only thing rhl:' :- .lre able to ment and could mean pos­ Black Friday morning. Even doing. Many employees of employees, who are the cogs drones dedicated t the chase gel. It rna:' be upsetting for sibly becoming a permaneD( if they are upset, there's the the stores that ch se to op n in the machine that aliO\\' the of the almighty dollar. By some, but p ople are still go­ employee. Thanksgiving positive outcome of extra on Thanksgiywg have to miss company to make any money "saving Thanksgiving.·· retailers ing to go out into the night will alwa~ ' s be the holiday cash for the holidays for Out on spending valuable time at all. It's unlikely that the big can also save the sanit) of their to get (hat 6 inch television for spending time with them to spend on presents with their f..1milies because they decision-makers will hav to sac­ employees and in the process on sale, or get the toys their your family. but slov..:l? the for their families. So should have to prepare to work the rifice any time spent with their perhaps even aid in subverting kids have been wanting on holiday sales will take over it be such a big deal? It is entire night. The importance own families on 1hanks~ving; the increasingly consun1erism­ their Christmas list. in the night, so employees understandable why some of a holiday that is dedicated to it's also likely that the:: can af­ fueled spirit of the holidays. Employees should expect shouldn't be surprised that might be upset, but most family should be respeaed by ford to pass on exua hOlliS. It's Thanksgiving is about the possibility of having to once in a while they may employees don't have to all parries. times W.:;:e these that the average spending time with &mil)'; not work on Thanksgiving Day, end up working a holiday, go into work for the Black Some would say that the person should be considered, pepper-spraying mangers in a considering the fact that tra­ especially Thanksgiving, Friday sales till at least past 7 employees have a choice to not the bottom line. People are crowd so that you can get your ditionally companies usually since Black Friday is the p.m., though most families . work on Thanksgiving Day going to go shopping around hands on more (ultimately treat it as a paid vacation. next morning. Is it better to do spend their Thanksgiving How much of a choice do the holidays; it is not essential meaningless) things. When it People might see it as wrong work on Thanksgiving Day time together past even 10 workers really have when they that they be able to do so on comes down to it, it's just stuff for companies to make than Christmas Day? A lot p.m. or later. This could also are in a financial situation where Thanksgiving night. being bought, be it a wafHe iron employees work on such a of people actually work on become a new family event they can't risk losing their job Shoppers are also respon­ or a big screen TV, Those same holiday that is for family Thanksgiving Day and not though, where families bond or say no to any ema hours? sible for showing sensitivity to people who will rush the doors bonding, but at same time, for Black Friday at all. For by going Thanksgiving shop­ It is fair and honorable to give employees. Their need to get ofToys R Us would show up the companies are gaining example some stores have ping early with the working employees time off for holidays the cheapest Xbox possible is to shop even if the store chose business and money from workers V(orking at least family member. It is the whenever possible. Some places, taking people away fl:om their to have their sales on a day that Black Friday shopping ~d­ some hours on any holiday first year that Black Friday such as hospitals and gas sta­ families, and just because they isn't a national holiday. It's not diets and the employees are ranging from Chrisunas to sales have started as early as tions, are open on holidays for are willing to sacrifice their holi- . really worth ruining someone's getting paid for their work; Easter. If the employee didn't 8 p.m., but only time will valid reasons. It is nor essential days in order to gain material Thanksgiving just to mal.:;:e or in many cases employe-es want to work on holidays, tell what is in store for Black for Target to encroach upon things doesn't mean everyone save a little extra money. even recieve bonus pay for it would have been best for Friday workers. OPINIONS I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I ruche [urrrnt 117

. OUR OPINION OUT OF LEFT FIELD Wealth blurs the lines·whe n it Pol"tical entanglements foul up comes to criminal sentencing even the nob est of.causes

Even here in America, the has, however, all been paid back, and other cases. Every generation is the one true. What actually happened original land of opportunity, according t~ news sources. For example, several paral­ that "ruins politics", at least was that instead of support­ there is a double standard. for the Despite that, the judge in her lels have been drawn betvveen according to the generation ing new USDA guidelines for haves and the have-nots. 1his case wasted no time in making this case and the case ofJan1es that came before. This is fruits and vegetables in school is made painfully obvious every an example of her, castigating Arthur Ray, an Oprah-endorsed hardly a recent phenomenon, lunches, they declared that the time there is a celebrity crial; her for her "simply abominable" self-help guru. Ray operated a . either; it stands to reason that tomato paste in pizza qualified more often than not, wealthy criminal record and her ex'Ploita- S\veadodge as parr ofhis opera­ people said the same things as a vegetable. That is bad celebrities and white-collar -tion of"govemmem generosiry." tion, du-ee people died, and he during the bloody political enough in and of itself, bm it criminals tend to get as much McLemore was sentenced to was conviaed of three counts fight mer FDR's Ne'.v D eal in only becomes more appalling slack affOrded them as the law three years in a federal prison. of negligent homicide. His the 1930 , or in 1856 when when one looks at the politi­ will allow (how many times has A person's crime should be sentence? 1\.,.'0 years. Somh Carolina ongressional cal subplot involved. Lindsay Lohan been arrested ju~oed independently of any At d1e same tim Mclemore rep resentative Preston Brooks Child obesit) has been Jeremy Zschau again?), 'while your average previous mme, especially if the was being cried, tWO people 'were nearl,r can d a c nator named one of r1.ichell barna's key lower-class citizen needs a com­ crime being committed is, like simultaneously in court facing Charles Sumner to death O\er issu since her husban cians eem opposed to any bination ofluck and a merciful IvfcLemores, inconsistent Vi>i.th charges over a multimillion­ a perceiv d insult to his state \\ on the presid"nC)', ince eff rt to curb thi condition. judge in order to receive the that record. Now. she obvi- dollar mortgage scam. They and his famil . coming to the \'(Ihite H ouse, Is it impl a knee-jerk reac­ same kind ofleruency. ously has 'made some "cry poor defrauded several d.i..fferent mort­ Than kfully actual ph. sical h has b orne involved in tion to anything that stinks A Mississippi woman nan1ed decisions in her J.ift.., and is now gage lenders ro the ume of mil­ alt rca.tio ben ' n politi- \'arious initiati es aimed at even lightly f liberalism, or Anim McLemore found out paying fur theD1. But does that lions of dollars. Their sentences? cians in cham b are a thi ng improving the diet and exer­ something more? abour that double standard mean her children have to pay as One man fecie\oo 30 months in f ch past in this c un try. cise of the nation's children. I am remind d fa pho­ firsthand. She found herself .fac­ well? What is to become of mem federal pIi n fuUowed b three velTheles , mao)' of the It', a laudable goal e pe iaily [Q CTraph of a morbjdJ y ob ing a three-year prison sentence while their momer is laf\,ouishing years of supervised release; his so-called tatesmen of today when one considers the fa t child sitting in a McDonald's. for the absolutely unforgivable in jail for the next three .;ears ? accomplice was sentenced ro five seem to doing their \ ery th at child obe il) is 3. major His finge were reminiscent crime oflying on her federal aid This is, simpl) put, an months in prison and three ),ears best to cement their reputa­ problem for this country. of fu t little cocktail sausag application in order to ensure instance of the punishment not of supervised release. All dlat, fur tions -alongside the famous But sinc Mrs. O bama is as he continued to shovel fast she would receive fuod stamps to fiuing me crime. In sentenc- millions of dollars as opposed dWldeilieads and partisan the wifi of a liberal president, fo od d O\-vTI his throat with a feed her children. Heinous, no? ing Mclemore, the judge fur to dlOusands, millions whose incompetents of the past \"rith her motiv have bizarrely ap id, contented expression Under the lav,~ a person surpassed the recommended original mvners are likely never their amics. come under flak from various n h is face. Frankly, it is an is not allowed to receive fuod punishment for her offense; the to see that money again. One thing that can be said right-Wing figures. Sardh Palin image that should embarrass stamps or other federal aid if prosecution recommended a ReD1ember dle e..xample about the politics of today is starred it all back during the anyon w ho finds any pride they have been conviaed ofa sentence of two to eight months, of Lindsay Lahan? Even after that although the politicians 2008 campaign, with her whJ.tsoever in calling them­ relony. McLemore has four such \\-hid1 would have allmvcd fur repeated ofrenses and probation themsel es aren't truly all that snide and backhanded com­ selves an American, juse as the convictions on her record, all the possibility of probation violations, it was like pulling much worse than their prede­ ments aboUl \/1rs. Obama. ramato paste decision should . . felony drug ofrenses, in addition after her release. Her three-year teeth just to find a judge cilat cessors, the process of politiCS Palin's monologue about Is this rully what Repub­ to a single misdemeanor convic­ sentence removes that possibility, would gnre her jail time. Com­ itself has certainly become how the government should Licans want, a nation of fat, tion. Hmvever, like so many in and [0 add insult to injury, d1e pare that to how Mclemore's more polarized. Dc?ending not be telling parents how mindless little consumers? the current economic climate, judge also levied a $250 fine. case mIlled out, and you have an on \\rith 'whom one is speak­ to feed their children caught It says a sad thing about our she was having difficulty keeping Again, this is not to say that idea of just how lo_udly money ing, bipartisanship is either a on among conservatives, and counny when that is even a her head above water financially, the punishment was unjust in talks in this counay. diny word or a lofty concept now it's rurned into a phrase legitimate question. Neverthe­ so she needed some sort of help and ofirsel£ Given her earlier Unsigned editorials nflect the that often doesn't work in mat conservative talking heads less, that is how they're acting: in order to keep feeding her criminal record it could be ar­ nu1jority viewpoint o/Ihe Cur­ reality. In the political arena and politicos like to parrot they'd rather trifle with the family. gued that the judge was perfecdy rent's Editorial Board: Matthew that is Washington D.C., even every time the subject of health of me nation's children Over a period of fuur years, justified in giving her more than P0Pos/ry, MinJ10 .fimg; Ashley the most trivial issue can be our nation's collective health and look our for the future of hom 2006-2010, McLemore re­ the minimum sentence. What AIkins, Om Marquis, Jenniftr turned imo fodder for a battle comes up. their corporate buddies than ceived a grand total of $4,367 in raises eyebrows in this siruation MetJhan, Jeremy Zschau and royale between left and right, It's utterly despicable, not take some common-sense . federal aid money.1har money is the oomparison between it Janaca Scherer. and that brings us to the most to mention baffling. Obesiry advice on health ftom a lib­ recent salvo in the ongoing is a nighanare for a child; the eral. This mindset, more than ideological struggle. effecrs it can have on their anything else, is truly what is You might have heard health, their social relations poisoning raday's America. something recently aboUt how with their peers and their self­ Jeremy Zschau is the Opin­ Congress "declared pizza. a image are troubling to say the ions Editor and a columnist for vegetable." That's not entirely least. Yet RepubUcan politi- The Current. 18 l1Chr~rrrnt I DECEMBER 5, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONUNE.COM I I OPINIONS SCIENCE MATTERS MAD WORLD St. Louis Zoo breakthroug may Women in comedy not immune mean comeback for hellbenders to a e tired doubl standards

A few years back when this They are noaumal and you GQ Magazine recently erage media consumer would university was searching for a will rarely see one even where named actress and comedian be hard pressed to find an mascot to replace the River­ they are plentiful. Kristen Wiig as its "Bro of example of a wildly success­ men, rhere was one name with Hellbenders were once the Year." The magazine's ful stage or screen performer a loyal following: the Hell­ common in Missouri's cold, glowing featl,lre on Wiig that hasn't been lauded for benders. fust-flowing streams, but in applauds her comedic talent their sex appeal at some point Not only is rhe Hellbenders recent years, their nwnbers and skill and her methods by some major media outlet a cool name for a sports team, have declined. The reason for as a performer. In the ac­ or another. Predictably, this but the hellbender is a native that decline is not clear and companying photos, Wiig is gets in the way of being taken ~ourisp~~,oneoforuy could be part of the global wearing lacy black underwear' seriously for many perform­ three types of giam salamander pattern of decline for all sp~es and the kind of pour most ers who possess a deep love in the world. The hellbender of amphibian. The anlphibians commonly seen benveen the for their craft. was once common, bur its did not seem to be reproduc­ pages of that legendary tome It may be seen as a neces­ nwnbers are dwindling. ing in the wild and no one ians have been declining in of feminist reading material, sary evil a woman must ac­ . amount of unconventional­ Hellbenders are shy had been able to breed them numbers, while there has been "Cosmomopoliran.'" cept in order to get to where looking men who succeed creatur~ and, despite their in captivity... unril now. The an alarming rise in the number It's always pleasing to see she wants to be, but it's high in the realm of comedy is name and fierce appearance, St.louis Zoo has successfully of defOrmities. Hellbender de­ V-lOmen being recognized in time we as a society question anything to go by. This isn't are mostly harmless. Their bite hatmed babv hellbenders. formities have also been on the print for their contributions the standards that we hold really the case for female per­ is not venomous, bur they do The roo has been parr of rise as their ~unlbe, rs decline.. to comedy - but is it too our female performers to. formers, however, and many have skill secretions rhdt are . a multi-agency program in Both the -Ozark hellbender much ro ask that they be able W'e're content to spend a half female comedians who make toxic to other animals. Those Missouri working to unravel and the eastern subspeci~ were ro keep their clothes on in hour being el1tertained by it to mainstream success are secretions oruy produce skin the reason tOr the hellbender's added to the Missouri state the accompanying photOs? aD actor on a sitcom (while more attractive than funny irritation in humans, although decline and to attempt to endangered species list in 2003. When being presented [Q a never really raking note of his (Whitney Cummings being you probably should not to breed them in captivity: The As many as 8,000 hellbend­ mainstream audience, tal­ level of physical attractive­ the most relevant example, eat one. roo has been working for 10 ers once lived in the Ozarks ented women are constantly ness). Shouldn:'t actresses be as anyone who has ever sat The hellbender is an entirely years ~o rry to breed the Ozark of Missouri and Arkansas, but reduced to the same son of afforded the same oppor­ through the predictable aquatic amphibian, although hellbender and on November now only about 600 are be­ simpering, pOUting pin-ups tunity: d,le chatlce to make punch Jines and ill-placed it can occasionally be found 15, they achieved success. As of lieved to remain. Not only are whose primary purpose is to us laugh without having to laugh tracks of "Whitney" on land during heavy rains. December 1, dley had hatmed there fewer hellbenders overall, titillate. That's all well and arouse anyone in rhe process? can attest). h breathes through its skin, 63 young hellbenders with but there are proportionally good and perhaps even has ft s been a long hard road Be it sportS, acting or although it has lungs that another 120 eggs due to hatch w,ver :'oung hellbenders thID irs pJace, but it's frust;:.lting for women in corned with comedy, anyone who is a can be used to gulp air at the soon. there were 20 ye-ars ago. [Q )t~ WOODen who do not many comedians who d n't profess ional at what they water's surface. The folds of its The plan is to release [he . CA'erall habitJ.t decline, make their living off of being fit the mold of a con ention­ do wan ts t be recognized skin undulate in the waterL and young hellbenders into the associated with develop- sny being forced imo what all,· attractive female not and praised for their talent capillaries near the skin caprure wild in about three to eight ment and overuse of streams appears t? be the only role making it very far, at least in and the skill they've honed oxygen from the flowing water. years, when they are marure. for recreation, is thought to society is able to view famous terms of mainstream success. through passion and hard Hence, clean water is essential The captive breeding program play some role in hellbender women as: sexy, sexy sex It's no secret [hat in almost work. The most many for hellbenders. not only aims [Q re-establish declines. There is also a direct symbols of sex. any field a woman chaos female performers can hope Hellbenders are covered hellbender populations bUt to human threat associated It's long been a trend to pursue a career in, her for is that even though the with folds of dark, reddish­ preserve genetic diversity for with people accidentall) or that talented women have perceived level of physical accompanying pictures are brovm skin, and often are ~e declining speci~. deliberarely killing hellbenders. to consider removing a few attractiveness will play some exy, the article wUl at least mottled or spotted on their One of the things the wo However, he~bende[ numbers articles of clothing to be seen role in her success, or lack touch on the topics of talent, backs, although the undersides researchers discovered is that are declining even in places far as worthy of mainstream at­ thereof This goes double for and despite how long this are a uniform color. They have hellbenders need lots of space from development, places that tention (for ev.idence of that, those interested in "show biz" has been the case for, it's still flat bodi~ and heads, with to breed. The wo simulated a seem [Q retain good habitat. pick up any magazine on the careers. One area of the busi­ disheartening to wirness. small.eyes and heavy, large tails 32-foot Ozark stream in the HopefUlly, the wo's breed­ newsstand). This is seen most ness where it's safe to say that Sharon Pruitt is a colum­ with keels for easy maneuver­ lab, with tightly controlled ing breakthrough will pur the often in the case of actresses sex appeal matters a little less, nist and staffwriter for The ing. Hellbenders are covered temperarure, lighting and hellbender on the road to re­ and musicians, where the av- however, is comedy, if the Current. with a slimy coating that may . warer conditions. The breed­ covery and have the colorfully help protect them from para­ ing area even had its ovm air named anlphibians once a..:,aa.i.n sites or infections and make it supply. Staff working with hell­ plentiful in Missouri streams, easier for them to slip through benders do not work with the even if we do not have a team the water as they swim. The building's other amphibians named after them. WHAT DO YOU THINK? hellbender's favorite food and repriles [Q avoid potential Gate lvfarquis is Am and is crayfish but they also eat contamination. EntertaFnment Editor and a Let us know at www.thecurrent-online.com worms, small fish and snails. \Vorldwide, amphib- columnist for The Current. URRENT-ONLlNE.COM DECEMBER 5, 2011 1:hf Qj}rrrnt 19 ------~------~------CURRENT HOROSCOPES by The Inane Collective altered by: . Horoscopes ...... Actual Thoughts on Life the Intern

~ SAGITTARIUS ~ CAPRICORN ~yj (Nov. 23 - DEC. 22) l:~-.J (DEC. 23 - JAN. 20) " ~ "~ You spend your life attempt­ Christmas is just around the Recent changes in your life Take some time this week to ing to salvage the worlds of corner and all you can think have left you wonderring just really review that heavy lab others and constantly find about is whether Santa thinks how those from your past material which will be covered yourself short up for your you've been a good child this would view you. Remember on the test in the coming own needs. A recent change year. Call the cops: Santa is that their wishes are simply weeks. You've been slacking will help remedy this: stay not the one stomping around that you enjoy life and stay all semester and need to focus strong. on your roof. safe.' a bit more closely.

ARIES r CANCER ~ , GEMINI ~~- ~ ~ '(MARCH 21 - APRI,": 20 (MAY 22 - JUNE 21) t(JUNE 22 - JULY 22) Do not hit brick walls this Take the road less traveled Life is tough sometimes. It will That flying monkey may week. Do not slam doors on and do not join a cult this sometimes seem the whole seem a rather enticing gift your hands this week. These week. It is becoming far too world is against you. Just choice for your three year-old are not intelligent actions. mainstream to do so and the remember: things work out in nephew this holiday season. Take a break from anger and world really does not need the end, one way or the other. However, keep in mind that eat a popsicle. Who cares any more sacrifices at this You will find happiness, so try those things poop on the go. about the snow? point. to be happy day-ta-day.

LIBRA ... VIRGO (SEPT. 24 - OCT. 23) ""'--01 (A~G. 22 - S~PT. 2~) You've reached a major turn­ You've spent so much time fjght­ Life is good right now, so You miss the love of your life. ing point in your life with the ing to be properly respected by keep on trucking on as you This is a challenging time, but have. Just remember to keep past few months and it seems those who show interest in being remember that your family that despite the challenges an eye out for potholes. They and friends are always there which are unstopably ap­ with you that you have forgotten can appear out of nowhere for you. Take a step back, proaching, you will manage how to trust potential sutors. Give and all of this rain certainly evaluate the challenges to stand tall all the same. that sweety a chance. diminishes your vision a bit. ahead and fight back.

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