I got many Merry Christmas greetings this is this good or if this Jim Dale guy is just year... via text message on my cell phone. the best book narrator on earth. I believe I Technology is leaving me behind. For a enjoyed the narrated books as much as the technology geek, I’m still kind of a Luddite. movies. The reason I took it to the next level What’s a Luddite? Someone who is anti- is because I started listening while I was technology, originally against the industrial working. I wondered how much it would revolution. You, see, Ned Ludd’s followers cramp my productivity. Can I concentrate? threw their wooden shoes called “sabots” Yes I can! Depending on what I’m doing. I into weaving machines to break them, thus can’t really write while I’m listening,I have the term “sabotage.” Wow, you learned to pause the audio, which is only a space- something! Unless you’ve seen Star Trek bar away to actively think about stuff. But VI, in which case you already knew that. there’s a lot of busy work to do where I find Hmmm? Okay, so I’m not going to break it very easy to multitask. Design work seems any machines. I already threw my laptop easy to accomplish while listening to Pro- down an alley and it just costs way too fessor Snape killing ... ah, I won’t give the much. But I’m often guilty of getting com- end of the book away. I’ve done a great deal fortable in my existing world and resisting, of the last couple of issues’ layouts while well, upgrades. hanging out at Hogwarts or going from “Good to Until this month, I didn’t Great.” I think it’s easier to get the concept of listen- listen to the fiction books ing to books on tape. while working by the way. Especially self-help and personal betterment In the end, I’ve discovered books. So you want to be that I can get twice as much a better person, more ef- done in half the time. This fective, etc. But you don’t is great. How did I wait so really feel like reading. long for this? By the way, You’re too lazy to pick that is pretty much the re- up the book and read it? alization I have each and Someone read me my every time I actually do try Tony Robbins enlighten- something new and better. ment manifesto because So why do I continue to re- I don’t want to use my I don’t own an iPod and Bono’s sist? I’m lazy, I guess. But I’ll got one named after him. I should own eyes. Well, if you’re get there. We’re all getting have asked him for one. Damn! hoping to reinvigorate BlackBerries at the office your life, you’re off to a good start. Maybe and I may even finally get me an iPod one you can go on a diet and have someone of these days. It’s probably sacrilegious for a hand-feed you and watch videos of people Mac die-hard like me not to have one. sweating. That’ll get you to your goal in no time. The Carnegie-Stout Public Library is my dealer. They have a great selection of books Okay, so I was wrong. My first experi- to choose from. I’m hoping that telling ence was actually not good. My lovely girl you that does not make you all go take my brought some books to listen to on the way books, but maybe the rush would give them to Minneapolis for Thanksgiving. It was a cause to get even a greater variety of books terrible, like “The Buttress of Windsor” or on CD. something. We quit listening to it and gave up. But later we tried again. She brought Jean Gullikson from the library now tells home the fifth Harry Potter book to listen me that there are MP3 books available too to on the way to Milwaukee a week later. through the library, but so far she says they About 10 minutes in I was hooked. I believe are not compatible with her iPod which is I listened to the book during every free mo- disappointing. Hopefully whoever is re- ment until I finished it. All 17 CDs. That’s sponsible for that service to the library gets over 20 hours. It’s like audio crack. on that soon. God forbid someone would make their service compatible with the sin- Then I took it to the next level. My drug of gle most popular MP3 service in the world. choice was, of course, the sixth Harry Pot- Must be a federal government program. ter book. I don’t know if every book on tape The 365ink crew... faces you already know!

Tim Brechlin Mike Ironside Tanya Graves Ellen Goodmann Tim Trenkle Ralph Kluseman Joie Borland Matt Booth Megan Dalsing Nick Klenske L.A. Hammer Chris Wand ISSUE # 20 In This Issue of 365ink... Dec.28-Jan10, 2007 YEAR The Dunleith Club: 4 END Community Events: 5 - 6 LISTS

Arts & Culture: 7 Tom Metcalf: 8 Comedy: 10

Gary Olsen’s TV Town: 11 Craft Beer: 12 Bud New Year’s Eve: 16& 17

18 Budweiser Live Music Wando’s Movie Reviews: 19

Mayor Roy Buol: 20 New Chamber Director: 21

Walk Yourself Thin: 22 Mattitude: 23

What’s Your Story: 24 Dear Trixie: Dr. Skrap’s: 25

365 Tips for Your Home: 26 Crossword / Sudoku: 27 Book Reviews / Stranger: 28

Galena: 29 Platteville: 30 365 News: 31

The Inkwell ) [email protected]) Publisher: Bryce [email protected] ( ) 563-543-4274 Tim Brechlin ( [email protected] ) 563-599-9436 Editor: Joie Borland ( Advertising: [email protected]) Ralph [email protected] ( Tanya Graves ( Ad Design: : Joey Wallis, Ron TIgges, Mike Ironside, Bryce Parks Photography Mike Ironside, Tim Brechlin, Ellen Goodmann, Joe Tower Writers & Content: Bryce Parks, L.A. Hammer, Chris Wand, Gary Olsen, Mayor Roy Buol, Matt Booth, Robert Gelms, Bryce Angela Parks, Koppes,, Mike Tim Ironside, Trenkle, Tim Nick Brechlin, Klenske Gary Olsen Graphic Design & Layout: Robert Parks, Kay Kluseman, No One is Safe! Distribution Coordinators: Jim Heckmann, Fran Parks, Kay Kluseman, Special thank you to: Brad Parks, Bob Johnson, Todd Locher, Dave Blake, Everett Buckardt, Julie Steffen, Sheila Castaneda, Tom Miller, Renae Gabrielson, Christy Monk, Katy Rosko, Ron & Jennifer Tigges and all the 365 friends and, IA advertisers, 52001 for all your support. You are all 365. , Dubuque West 1st Street (563) 588-4365 365 • 210 Dubuque & photos to the address above or by e-mail. Office Phone or Music/Events/Movie Hotline 365 @ We welcome all submission of articles

We’ve hidden 365’s WANDO somewhere in this issue of Dubuque365ink. Can you find the master of movies buried within these pages? Hint: He’s tiny and could be anywhere ! Good Luck! Win- ners get a free warm fuzzy felling in your belly! Roy Buol Gary Olsen Robert Gelms Ron Tigges Angela Koppes Joey Wallis I HAVE ENOUGH CHRISTMAS COOKIES TO LAST A FORTNIGHT! 4

a team whose culinary talents are un- music, literature, travel, food, and phi- rivaled. Their addition to the Captain losophy first-hand, and “Culture Clash” Merry’s dedicated staff prepares the way – a fun mix of experiences from kitsch to for the next step in the restaurant and high-culture. Friday and Saturday nights lounge’s evolution – the Dunleith Club. offer the casual elegance of fine dining in the relaxed atmosphere of the Dunleith Club. Dining ur cover image of the new Cap- her husband Bob symposia, black-tie events, O tain Merry portrait serves a dual Johnson purchased club challenges, holiday function in this issue of 365ink. Not the house with the parties, private and sur- only will the finished portrait by our intention of not prise events are all part of cover artist Tom Metcalf be unveiled only restoring the the mix club members can at the Captain Merry New Year’s Eve neglected building look forward to. Party, but the coming of 2007 marks but creating a place the start of a new kind of experience in that balanced luxury and Old World With the help of the staff fine living. With the beginning of the new charm with everyday accessibility. of Dubuque365.com, club year, the Captain Merry, the East Dubuque Based on the concept of the partially pri- members will always be up to date The result was the Captain Merry Res- luxury guesthouse, spa and restaurant, an- vate Captain’s Club, the Dunleith Club about entertainment and events thanks taurant and Guesthouse, a gourmet res- nounces the Dunleith Club. will become a fully private club on Janu- to weekly communication based on the taurant utilizing the talents of ary 1, 2007. Club members and their web site’s LiveWire model. Named for the origi- chef and sommelier Jim Terry guests will still be able to enjoy the full nal moniker of East and an inn with five suites, dining and entertainment functions of the Dubuque, the Dun- each with a different themed Captain Merry. The lounge and restaurant leith Club offers the Tri- décor that elevate the B&B will become the club members’ own pri- States a gathering place experience to new levels. The vate space – a home away from home that to experience some of addition of a full-service salon is always well-stocked and ready for en- the finest food and entertainment in the and spa increased the tertaining, whether it’s for a meeting with area. A community of diverse individu- Captain Merry’s po- clients, a romantic dinner for two, or just a als with a common interest in fine living, tential for even greater relaxed evening after work with friends. the club offers members the best in wine, luxury for both guests gourmet food and culture in the relaxed and area residents. A new and ever-evolving menu by the atmosphere of one of the area’s most creative kitchen guys means members Now as sommelier Club members receive preferential res- beautifully restored Victorian mansions. can enjoy incredible food, prepared from and director of club ervations to the Captain Merry Inn and fresh, often organic ingredients – from For those who might not yet have experi- food and beverage Spa, including a 20% Club discount on reasonably priced appetizers at the bar enced the Captain Merry, let us catch you service, Jim Ter- rooms and a 10% Club discount on all to the epicurean dinners for which the up. The Italianate house, built in 1867 on ry is joined by spa services. restaurant is known. the hill overlooking Sinsinawa Avenue, Kendall Clark was used back in the day by the suc- as executive Club members not cessful ferryboat captain to greet guests chef and Kevin only have full ac- and host parties. Fast-forward to 2001 Scharpf as sous cess to club ame- … architect Bethany Golombeski and chef to create nities, but also help to decide club program- ming and events. Have an interest you want to learn more about or know a musician you think others would like? Share your interests and favorites The club’s already substantial list of ame- with the club. One of the primary goals nities is augmented by a regular sched- of the Dunleith Club is to create events, ule of live music and fun themed events. entertainment and dining experiences that Jazz, blues and classical music, plus offer fun tailored to your specific tastes. performances by some the best regional singer/songwriters, are featured on most Maybe best of all, club memberships pay Thursdays and some Saturdays. Regular for most programming, so once you’re in, monthly events on Wednesday nights you don’t have to pay a cover charge to include women’s only and men’s only see some of the area’s best live music in nights, “Art of Living” nights giving mem- a relaxed, smoke-free atmosphere. While bers an opportunity to learn about art, there are no spending requirements, mem- bers who frequent the club have the oppor- tunity to earn perks like free gifts and fur- ther discounts on rooms, spa services and other amenities. Joining the Dunleith Club is your key to one of our community’s most contemporary entertainment facilities and all the perks that come with it. For more information, visit www.dunleithclub.com, email [email protected], or call Brad Parks at (563) 590-4189. 2007 - HOW MANY BEERS WE CONSUMED IN 2006 5

- the number of active 43 economic development 2006•THE LISTS•2007 projects underway in Hey, what’s the deal with all these lists? vorite burger joints to the long-awaited DUBUQUE Dubuque as of November, 2006. That Well, c’mon! It’s the start of a brand top secret list of facts you never knew includes projects like the new Theisen’s new year ... and here at 365, we’ve en- about the 365ink staff. (Be afraid. The By The Number distribution facility, the new Giese Manu- joyed so much over the past year that contents may shock and awe.) facturing plant, the Sedgwick CMS facil- we’ve needed to write it all down so Not exactly a list, but a few figures ity in the Technology Park, The National we can remember it for 2007! (Long Enjoy yet another look into our twisted, at year’s end to help measure our Mississippi River Museum and Aquarium nights working on a paper will do that mangled personalities ... and see if you community. expansion, the new McGraw-Hill build- to you.) You’re going to see various lists agree with us about terrible movies! (You ing at the Port of Dubuque, the Diamond interspersed throughout this issue of probably won’t, so get those boxing gloves Sometimes we take for granted the Jo Casino expansion, the Dubuque Star 365ink, with topics ranging from our fa- ready. We’re ready to throw down.) community in which we live, momen- Brewery renovation, the Briggs/Durrant tarily forgetting the challenges we’ve renovation of the Adams Co. site at the faced, the obstacles we’ve overcome Port, Cottingham & Butler’s renovation and how good life in the Dubuque area and expansion, McGladrey & Pullen’s Celebrate Each Other “celebrate each other!” Admission is can be. While some might complain expansion in the downtown Hartig free and snacks will be provided. The that we still don’t have that all-impor- building, the restoration and redevelop- celebration is sponsored by Partners tant indicator of economic success and ment of the Silver Dollar Cantina/Old “Celebrate Each Other,” a day of fun, in Learning, Americorps, the Carnegie high culture, a Red Lobster franchise German Bank and A.J. Spiegel’s two learning and celebration – for kindergar- Stout Public Library, the Multicultural (really, people ... it’s not that good. multi-million-dollar condo construction ten through 5th grade students is set for Family Center and the YAPPERS (Youth You’re better off going to Timmerman’s projects, just to name a few. Monday, January 15, from 1 to 3 p.m. at Area Philanthropists of the Community or a number of other local restaurants the Carnegie Stout Public Library. From Foundation of Greater Dubuque). Ndo for seafood), Dubuque is really grow- - d o l l a r s arts and crafts, to stories and a puppet registration is required. For more infor- ing to be one of the best cities in Iowa, 9,178,415 budgeted for show, everyone will be encouraged to mation, call Theresa at 588-2700. if not the whole U.S. of A. the City of Dubuque’s street improvement program in fiscal year 2006. Coming to a street near Ten “guilty pleasures” of living in Dubuque you! Seriously, 20 years ago, we had some major potholes in this town.

10. Enjoying the huge paycheck you just got ... and then blowing it - the ranking for Dubuque at the riverboat. 7 Community Schools out of 2,200 school districts 9. One last cheese nugget at the Shot Tower. (Mmmm ... heart attack.) nationwide, according to Expansion 8. Line-dancing at the Dubuque County Fairgrounds. Management Magazine, a business publication for companies looking to 7. Bloody Marys at Jumpers. (Tanya’s favorite) expand or relocate. 6. Pabst Blue Ribbon on tap at Isabella’s. (Here’s to dads everywhere!) - Dubuque’s ranking for 5. Ci-Ci’s Pizza Buffet (in particular, the alfredo pepperoni pizza lowest property tax rate and the CINNAMON ROLLS!). 1 out of the nine largest cit- ies in Iowa. In fact, the highest-ranked 4. The Coliseum and Arena (yeah, we’ve seen you there “raisin’ the roof”). Having arrived at the end of 2006, here city (Waterloo - $18.85) is 89% higher are a few numbers from the past year 3. The burgers at Paul’s Tap (get the grilled onions). than Dubuque’s rate, and the average (and years past) to put things into per- ($15.69) is 57% higher than Dubuque. 2. Karaoke at the Julien. (Don’t deny it: You’ve done it.) spective. 1. Knowing that no matter where you are in Dubuque, you’re no more - Dubuque’s ranking for - Dubuque’s ranking in job than 46.3 seconds away from somewhere you can procure a beer. 1 lowest property tax per 1 growth of all cities in Iowa capita out of the ten larg- in 2006. In fact, if you est cities in Iowa. The highest ranked look back to 2005, Dubuque County, city (Iowa City) is 97% higher than with just 3% of Iowa’s population, was Dubuque’s taxes per capita and the av- responsible for 8.14% (3,000 jobs) of erage is 62% higher than Dubuque. the state’s job creation. These are just some of the reasons - Dubuque’s ranking in job Dubuque was named a 2006 Iowa 22 growth out of 387 Ameri- Great Place by the Iowa Great Places can cities in 2006. We Citizen Advisory Board. And if it’s good came in just after Austin (Texas), be- enough for them, it’s good enough for tween Dallas and Orlando. In fact, us! (Actually, we already knew it was Dubuque is the only midwest city in a great place.) Thanks to the City of the top 25. Dubuque City Manager’s office and Dan McDonald, Assistant Director at As a contrast, it will be 25 years ago the Greater Dubuque Development January, 2007 (January 1982) that Corporation, for not only providing us Dubuque ranked number 1 in the na- with some 2006 numbers to measure tion for unemployment with a rate of our progress, but also for working to 23%. Yes kids, it really was that bad. create conditions in which our com- munity can continue to thrive. I ALWAYS THOUGHT AULD LANG SYNE MEANT “DRINK MORE CHAMPAGNE” 6

For the historically inclined among Hey, look! Library! you, start making plans to celebrate the birthday of a certain president who Yeah, we’ve got one of those, and it’s ac- fought an unpopular war but wound tually a really good library. Guess what: up making our country stronger. Abe Not only do they have books (get out!), Lincoln’s gonna be 198, yo! Kevin but they have special programs going Koester, renowned for his portrayals on, too! of the president, will be at the library on February 6 at 7 p.m. in the second First off, they’ve been running a series of floor rotunda. He’ll relate some histor- Wednesday morning computer classes, ical facts about his life, and then he’ll and another series begins on January 10, mill about with the audience. Cake continuing through April 25. Classes in- will be served. Mmm ... snacks. clude Beginners Internet Searching (an in- troduction to Google and a bunch of other Oh, you want more? I guess they can Internet sites) and Heritage Quest (kind of give you more. Feeling a little artsy? an introduction to resources for geneal- There’s going to be a great program ogy work: Census data, family records known as Art @your library, which and local histories). All classes are held on will represent a partnership with 20 Wednesday mornings from 9 until 10 a.m. local artists who will be showing off Registration is required, and it’s limited to a bunch of different styles and media: 12 students. For availability, stop over at Watercolors, sculpture, oil paintings, the Adult Services Information Desk, or mixed media, pottery, quilts ... you get call 563-589-4225, option 4. the idea, I think. Art can be viewed in the library gallery during regular li- There’s also a book discussion group for brary hours. adults, called ... wait for it ... “Let’s talk mas trees after the new year? books.” The next meeting is on Tuesday, The featured artists for January’s Art @ January 9, at 7 p.m. in the second floor your library program will be local arti- A. Bonfires gallery. This one centers on A Walk in sans Liz and Rich Robertson, joined by Answers on page 31 B. Making Festivus poles the Woods: Rediscovering America on Rosanne Wilgenbush. For more infor- C. Carving them into cricket bats the Appalachian Trail, written by native mation, call 563-589-4225, option 7. 1. The first dropping of the ball in D. Making pencils Iowan Bill Bryson. The book follows Times Square occurred when? Bryson and a college friend who start The Carnegie-Stout Public Library out in Northern Georgia and plan on 6. In what city is an elevator used for is located at 360 West 11th Street, hiking the entire Appalachian Trail (all A. 1907 the New Year’s Eve countdown? open from 9 a.m. - 9 p.m. on Mon- B. 2001 2100 miles of it), and writing down the day through Wednesday, 1 to 9 p.m. accounts of their travels along the away. C. Dick Clark’s birthday A. Chicago on Thursday and 9 a.m. until 5 p.m. on D. 1699 Copies of the book can be picked up at Friday and Saturday. B. Seattle the Circulation Desk. C. Dubuque 2. What do the words Auld Lang Syne D. Le Claire, Iowa mean? 7. Dick Clark has been hosting the A. Bruce bruce bruce Rockin’ New Year’s Eve ever since B. Times Gone By what year? C. Grand New Year D. Bring More Bacon A. 1966 B. 1492 3. Which of these is NOT one of the C. 1981 ten most common New Year’s resolu- D. 1972 tions? 8. The New Year’s Eve leading up to- Thunderbirds Hockey vs. Chicago A. Be a better person January 1, 1863, was known as Free- January 6, 2007 at 7:05 p.m. B. Eat a better diet dom’s Eve. Why was this? C. Take better care of animals Thunderbirds Hockey vs. Michigan January 7, 2007 at 2:05 p.m. D. Stick to a budget 9. Name the most popular New Year’s TIX: $7 ADULTS, $5 STUDENTS, $4 G.A. Day parade. 4. The Chinese New Year is celebrated: ANDERSON WEBER TOYOTA PRESENTS: 10. Which of these is the best place to A. January 1 CHAMPIONSHIP BULLRIDING party on New Year’s Eve? Fri. January 12 &13, 7:30 p.m. B. March 1 Prices are $30.50, $22.50, $16.50 G.A. C. The second new moon after the A. The Busted Lift (Children 15 and under get $10 off all listed prices) winter solstice B. Bricktown D. December 25 C. East Dubuque Fly-By-Night Productions presents: D. They’re all going to be fantastic ... “Humble Boy” 5. In many countries, what is the tra- just make sure you have a designated Bijou Room , January 19, 20,21 26,27,28 ditional method of disposing of Christ- driver Tickets are $12 ($10 Sun) lated education. (Really! We’re not joking!) sic, they tend to do a little bit of music-re Over at the Northeast Iowa School of Mu Faculty rulestheschool Who rulestheschool? And one of the pre-requisites for offering for pre-requisites the of one And call 563-583-9343. mation, hit the Web site at www.otlag.com or noon until 4 p.m. on Sundays. For more infor- til 5p.m. Tuesday throughSaturday andfrom Outside theLinesisopenfrom10a.m.un- You don’t want tomakepeoplecry, doyou? ception, because otherwise, people might cry. re opening the make to try But artwork. cent magnifi some be surely will what experience the opening reception, you’ll still have time to display until February 28, so if you can’t make tion, scheduled for 7 to 9 p.m. The show itself will be on recep the at served be will d’ouevres hors and Drinks Decorah artistGeorgeLowe. of pottery beautiful traditional, the with coupled Braig Jenny painter Dakota South of paintings land scape vibrant the present will Clay of Fields exhibition: Fields ofClay. newest its for 5, Friday,January on event ists” art the “meet a and reception opening an ing ever host be will Bluff, 409 at digs than new its in now better Gallery, Lines the Outside Fields ofClay BUDWEISER NIGTHLIFE BY PHONE 588 -4365 ------ets, callNISOMat563-690-0151. purchasetickto or Forinformation more admission tickets are$8($5forstudentsandseniors). general and Road, Asbury on College Bible Emmaus of Chapel Marble to spend a Saturday. way It’ll begin entertaining at 8 p.m. in the pretty a be should it evening, the throughout and selections instrumental vocal both offer to very Set their own. of recital a presenting be will faculty NISOM 20, January Saturday, On a talentedteamoffacultymembers. havingexpect, might you as is, education - - I CANMAKEGREATARTWITHCRAYOLAMODELMAGIC 7 I DIDN’T KNOW LUCAS McINTIRE WAS FROM OUTER SPACE! 8

om Metcalf is a busy guy. The art- challenge of making each painting work ist and Clarke College instructor is stylistically, while incorporating not only a Tcurrently exhibiting a series of paintings representation of the mythical zodiac fig- at the Dubuque Museum of Art and work- ure, but also the associated constellation, ing on a number of projects, including gemstone, glyph, color and flower for each portraits of three individuals notable for sign. Each painting went through a number their contributions to the Tri-State com- of early versions, of which Metcalf made munity. One is the portrait of Captain digital comps for the publisher to review. Merry, the historic ferryboat captain who After a few revisions, the final designs were built the Dunleith (East Dubuque) Victo- finalized with all of the paintings being rian mansion that now serves as an inn completed in about two months. and restaurant bearing his name. The re- cently finished portrait graces our cover and will make its public debut at the East Dubuque inn on New Year’s Eve.

I caught up with Metcalf on a recent Fri- day afternoon to learn more about the portrait, the Museum of Art exhibit and Tom his other work. As he had a few errands to run, he invited me along for the ride and an op-portunity to talk about his work. Metcalf After a quick peek into his Locust Street (Re)creating studio, we drove down to Dubuque’s Old Main district to make a quick stop at the new Upstart Crow Gallery. One of Metcalf’s history paintings was recently put on display in the gallery and he wanted to see it. “So much in oil paint time is spent in the studio with the work,” he explained, looking at the now framed painting spot lit on the gallery wall. “It’s dif- ferent when you see it hung in the space.” The exhibition is the first in a series of lo- The painting is the first to be exhibited by cal artists by the museum. Being a local gallery owner Tracey Briggs, and repre- artist, Metcalf used local models in some sents the establishment of a relationship of the paintings. His wife Olivia posed with Upstart Crow that promises further for the Gemini panel. Kristina Castaneda collaboration in the next year. Titled “Ma- served as the model for Virgo, and Park bon,” the painting was originally commis- Farm winemaker Lucas McIntire is de- sioned by St. Paul publisher Llewellyn for picted for Aquarius. The resulting astro- the cover of a book on the history of the logical calendar, published by Llewelyn Autumn Equinox. The initial job led to a is available online and locally at Borders commission by the publisher for a series and the Clarke College Bookstore. The of paintings of the signs of the zodiac for a paintings will be on exhibit at the mu- 2007 astrological calendar. As those paint- seum through February 25. ings are now on display at the Museum of Art, we made our way up Locust Street to On our way back to his studio, Metcalf the museum to take a look. told me a little about his work toward a Master of Fine Arts degree from the Maine Comprising the twelve signs of the zodiac College of Art in Portland. A philosophy- and a thirteenth of the astrological wheel, heavy program that utilizes an interdis- the oil paintings on wood panels took a ciplinary approach, the program incor- year to produce. Metcalf explained the porates two summer residencies and two LOOK AT THAT PHOTO. TOM METCALF IS ONE STYLIN’ DUDE. 9

10-day winter residencies. The schedule drawings and handwritten calligraphy for allows him to work on his MFA during an illustrated children’s fantasy book he’s his breaks from teaching art at Clarke. also working on I start to understand that Metcalf is in the process of restoring the Metcalf’s work is about the tension be- 19th century house that serves as both tween reality and myth. His work is figu- home and studio. Like-wise the studio is rative, often depicting real people from an arrangement of works in progress. The our own community or history but he also nearly complete portrait of Captain Mer- paints fantasy subjects and faeries. He ry sits on an easel. Nearby sits his por- uses a technique of layered translucent oil trait of former Clarke president Catherine glazes, reminiscent of the Northern Re- Dunn. In progress, an early version of naissance painting tradition employed by the painting was featured in our April 20 the likes of Jan Van Eyck and Albrecht Du- issue of 365ink. His third major portrait rer, which he learned from Patrick Betaud- in progress is of University of Dubuque ier of the Atelier Neo Medici in Monfla- benefactor Alta Blades. Commissioned quin, France. With the glazing technique by local attorney David Hammer as a gift he can render faces and objects with the to the university, the completed portrait illusion of mass existing in a three-dimen- will hang in Blades Chapel. On the wall sional space, but the technique gives the hangs a variety of drawings and paint- paint a luminosity that calls attention to ings including the portrait of actor Bar- richness of the surface challenging the rett Miller, Metcalf painted for filmmaker viewer to reconcile the illusion with the Travis Wilkerson’s 2004 Sundance-fea- reality. Am I looking at a face or is it tured film,Who Killed Cock Robin?. paint? What does “real” mean?

Among the sketches and “It sounds like I’ve got a books on arcane subjects million things going,” he like 19th century occult says as we look around photography, he shows me the studio at his various a prototype of a new inven- paintings and projects, tion he’s working on he calls “but they’re all leading a “mythoscope.” The optical somewhere.” While he device is a combination of a has obviously had his stereoscope, the Victorian greatest success as an art- version of the ViewMaster, ist, having solo shows at and a Thaumatrope, a Victo- Chicago’s gescheidle gal- rian-era toy that utilizes the lery, not to mention his We couldn’t help but notice that you’re reading 365ink! concept of persistence of vi- portrait and commission sion having separate images work, he’s not content to If you would like the Ink available at your popular public place, or if you on either side of a round rest on past accomplish- wish you could pick it up somewhere it’s currently not available, please disk that when spun on a ments or be limited to any let us know. E-mail us at [email protected] or call 563-588-4365. string merge to form one. single mode of expression. People go where they can get their 365INK! The current version of the “I don’t want to deny my mythoscope is a prototype creativity in any way,” he Better yet, if Dubuque365.com or 365ink are perfect that features two motorized confesses. “I don’t want to for reaching your active target market, you know, spinning disks reflected in say I’m just a painter.” the kind of people who get out of the house, contact mirrors. Each side features Joie Borland. That’s her over there to the right. She’ll an irreducible component of a composite We jump back into the car and head to show you all the options and opportunities 365 can image. In viewing it, our brain combines Galena. He used to live there and wants offer, and help you to tailor an extremely affordable the stereo composites into one three-di- to grab a few things he left behind in a for- campaign to get your message out there. mensional composite image. I look into mer studio. Earlier, we talked about pho- the box and find it really works. Metcalf tography being part of his MFA program, explains that the final version will be more so on the way I ask him what relationship Joie Borland•[email protected]•(563)588-4365 ornate and feature a hand-crank, as if it photography has with his painting. “(It’s) a were created in the Victorian era like the means to an end,” he explains. “I’m not so devices that inspired it. interested in the ‘authenticity’ debate. I’ve worked so much from life that it doesn’t “Why did you name it the mythoscope?” really matter. I appropriate where neces- I ask him. He notes how the partial im- sary to achieve my aims.” It makes sense. ages, fragments of mean-ing, really, are Why wouldn’t a contemporary painter use combined to form a more complete pic- all the tools available? Digital cameras ture that we can believe is real. The final and Photoshop are just new tools in the version, powered by hand, will take it a painter’s toolbox. His next comment re- step further by masquerading as an an- minds me of the luminescent paintings in tique curiosity but representing even larg- his studio or those on display at the Muse- er illusions. “We power these myths we um of Art, but has a thread that runs back put together in life,” he says. I’m getting through the history of painting. “The 16th the feeling he’s talking about more than century glazing techniques I use create an the device in front of me at this point. object with its own qualities,” he notes.

As he shows me a hand-bound book with Continued on page 27 EXPIRES JANUARY 31, 2007 WE GOT THIS PAPER OUT ON CHRISTMAS DAY. THAT’S COMEDY! 10

Fri. Dec. 29th & Sat. Dec. 30 for $17, and you can pick them up at the Bell Tower Theater’s box office, by telephone at 563-588-3377 or Comedy by Tim Joyce online at www.belltowertheater.net. (The Bell Tower is Arthur House Restaurant, 9 PM in Fountain Park, at 2728 Asbury Road, for the record.

Wednesday, January 3 Wednesday, Jan. 17 Live on Main Comedy The Nerds of Comedy @ Live on Main Bricktown Entertainment Complex Bricktown Entertainment Complex 9:30 PM (Doors open at 8:30 PM) 9:30 PM (Doors open at 8:30 PM) Dean Haglund is probably 3100 Comedy Night w/ best known for his nine seasons play- Comedians Rob Brackenridge ing Langly, one of the computer geeks and John Burton known as “The Lone Gunmen” from the 3100 Club at the Midway Hotel hit FOX TV series The X-Files. His TV 8:00 PM - 10:00 PM credits include VIP, Home Improvement, The Commish, Sliders, Honey, I Shrunk Saturday, January 6th 9:00 PM the Kids and the X-Files movie. Mark Donnie Baker and Friends Live Price is fondly remembered as “Skippy”, Live on Main Comedy @ Bricktown the quintessential ‘80s nerd on the hit The original “I swear to God” man from the television series, Family Ties. Price also Bob & Tom Show along with Mike Toomey dazzles television audiences with his from Chicago, whom you’ve also heard on Bob and Tom. stand-up act, having appeared on such Visit Etix.com for tickets and join us at the show! comedy specials as The A List, Evening at the Improv, Comic Relief,& 7 appearances on Fox’s Comic Strip Live. Friday, Jan. 5 & Saturday, Jan. 6 Comedy by Warren B. Hall Friday, February 2nd, Rooster’s in Platteville @ Arthur House Restaurant, 9 PM Saturday. February 3rd, Bricktown Wednesday, January 10 Michael Winslow Eagle 102 welcomes Live on Main Comedy actor and comedian Bricktown Entertainment Complex Michael Winslow, 9:30 PM (Doors open at 8:30 PM) known worldwide for his wacky role as Officer Larvelle Jones in the 3100 Comedy Night, Police Academy film series. After w/ Comedians Jason Russell and Mela- winning the Gong Show’s top hon- nie Maloy ors twice, he made his film debut 3100 Club at the Midway Hotel in Cheech And Chong’s Next Movie 8:00 PM - 10:00 PM followed by Cheech And Chong’s Nice Dreams. Following stardom in Friday, Jan. 12 & Saturday Jan. 13 Police Academy, he then went on to play a part in Spaceballs and as the voice of Stripe, the evil little Stand Up Comedy with creature in the hit movie Gremlins. Michael, a master of Headliner Paul Kelly vocal gymnastics, can imitate over 1,000 sound effects Arthur House Restaurant, 9 PM using his voice alone. The show will include big screen video and effects. Tickets are on sale for $20, at Brick- Saturday, January 13th 6 PM & 8:30 PM town, Moondog Music and at ETIX dot com, this is a 19 Windy City Laughs plus show. There will be two shows 7 and 9:30. Bell Tower Theater Join us for a show- case of some of Chi- 365’s Eight Favorite Mexican Restaurants! cago’s funniest come- dians. Lauren Bishop, 8. Taco John’s (Mmm ... taters.) Josh Cheney and Ty- 7. Taco Bell (College days coming back to us.) ron Foston kick of the 6. Los Arcos (That’s a HUGE margarita!) show, then headliner 5. Taqueria (Right over by K-Mart. Check ‘em out!) Mark “The Knife” Faje, who’s been all over your televi- 4. Salsa’s (Won’t you come back to us? Please?) sion sets with appearances on The Late Show with Da- 3. Los Margaritas (Mmm ... cheese.) vid Letterman, Ripley’s Believe it or Not and America’s 2. Carlos O’Kelly’s (Great for Lunchtime Jams!) Got Talent. Tickets for Windy City Laughs are on sale 1. Los Aztecas (Bryce would die without carnitas.) HIGH SCHOOL HOUSE: GUARANTEED NOT TO FALL DOWN AND GO BOOM! 11

of the homes. There are also he readily admits he likes the mistakes (if tached to this project always ask me if some zero lot townhouses they don’t waste too much material), be- I’ve learned anything myself about build- which have been built cause that’s how some students learn. ing a house. Well, I’ve learned quite a lot. here, too. I’ve learned that this is hard work even “Sometimes we get into trouble when a with all the power tools and nifty inno- With the nice sized lots, student decides to take a shortcut or do vations we see every year in the building you’ll have a lot of oppor- things his own way,” explains Larry. “But trades that make houses better and easier tunities to landscape. And occasionally we get students who know and faster to build. I also learned I never since you would be living a few things about building a house or want to do any roofing or, for that matter, next to the Arboretum, they may already be working in con- get on top of a roof for any purpose. well, the stakes are high struction. We almost get someone like to do a good job at that. that in every class, and when that hap- This year, for the first time, I decided to pens, sometimes they can teach us a few get up on the roof with my 17 lb. JVC Personally, I love the things. We are very open to that.” video camera to capture the kids doing area. The district has the shingling and roof vent installation. built three houses in this At various times during the project that It was particularly dangerous for me be- subdivision, and it looks lasts from late August to the middle of cause I was top heavy with the camera. like next year’s High May, Jan Mozena’s Interior Design stu- One false step, and I would have tumbled School House will also dents visit the construction site and con- off that roof and God knows what the ex- be located here on the fer with the construction students and tent of my injuries would have been. last available lot. sub-contractors. Jan’s students are in charge of determining the interior col- But I’ll bet I would have gotten a great I had covered this ors, textures, floor coverings, woodwork, shot on the way down. project for some years door and window styles, kitchen cabi- before I decided that nets, counter tops, bathroom fixtures, Tune in to High School House on our I wanted to do a tele- lighting, and the exterior landscaping. website, www.dubuque.k12.ia.us. The vision series covering There are five students in the class this story and the link to the video episodes the entire program year. Their designs are juried by profes- are on the front page. Or watch us on from start to finish and produce it sional decorators, a real-estate agent, Mediacom Channel 19. as a series. I didn’t have the access to a and of course Jan Mozena. We’ll film Gary Olsen is an award-winning media full-time cable channel like I do now, so that event in late February and it will be designer for the Dubuque Community this was one of my first series ideas. High School House an episode in the series. Schools and can be reached by e-mail at by Gary Olsen All I really had to do was show up and A lot of people who know that I’m at- [email protected]. It’s a reality show that follows the photograph whatever was being done. From the first excavator penetrating the experiences of high school students ground for the foundation to the last building a $300,000 house. But the piece of molding tacked around a door students end up building more than frame; from meeting the kids for the first a house. They build teamwork, re- time in the classroom to the spring open lationships, character and memo- house where I finally meet their parents, ries that will last a lifetime. grandparents, sisters and brothers. The whole project is life-affirming and it’s This is my second year producing and what’s great about this program. actually filmingHigh School House. It’s a Many of the kids go into the building reality show on Channel 19 (Mediacom) trades, many go on to college, and they that follows the fortunes of 17 students set their sights on becoming engineers, as they pursue a hands-on applied tech- contractors, electricians, decorators and nology course administered by Dubuque architects. Senior High School, and involving stu- dents from the other two high schools in And frankly what’s really life-affirming is town, Wahlert and Hempstead. when the house these young people built sells in the spring. It’s not uncommon to Under the guidance of teachers Larry have a bidding contest over the house Cording (construction) and Jan Mozena because people know that it’s one of (design and interior decorating), the pro- the best built homes they will ever buy. gram is sponsored by the Dubuque Board That’s because nothing less than excel- of Realtors and financed by Premier Bank. lent is allowed to stand. Certainly mis- The project’s roots actually go back some takes are made since this house serves as 30 years. I’ve lived in Dubuque long the learning process, but rest assured the enough to remember the very first house mistakes are corrected fast. Several reasons we will not feature a best albums of ‘06 list that was built and how much attention 5. There were about 40,000 CDs released in ‘06 and we’ve heard them all yet. was paid to it back then. The house was To do this project right, you need an expe- handsome yet modest when compared 4. We don’t all have the same taste in music. (Tim listens to Leonard Cohen. rienced faculty. Larry Cording admits he’s Bryce listens to Rush, Mike listens to NPR, and Ralph hears the Beatles even to today’s average house. built a lot of houses, and he remembers when the radio is off.) each and every one of them and the crews 3. There are thousands of bloggers with nothing better to do than make best of Today’s house, incidentally, is located in that worked on them. He’s a taskmaster that splendid subdivision adjacent to the ‘06 lists. (Lots of MySpace users, too.) and he has no patience for the casual or 2. We don’t have time to sit around debating the relative merits of pop music Dubuque Arboretum and Botanical Gar- the slipshod. He’s generous with his time dens. It’s a beautiful area, great location, icons. (There’s no debate. Paula Abdul reigns supreme.) and talents, and it’s clear he loves this pro- 1. Nobody cares. and the lots are ample relative to the size cess, the interaction with the students, and MY ALBUM OF BELCHING THE ABCs IS THE YEAR’S BEST ALBUM 12

Bluff Street Brew Haus at 372 Bluff. “They start out in California, or over on the East Coast with Sam Adams, and they slowly make their way towards the Midwest.” And he would know: Jerry’s been brewing beer for 20 years. “Of course, it was a lot tougher back then,” the career engineer says, laughing as he remembers the darker ages of homebrew- ing. “Now, you really don’t have to look far to find the ingredients you need. Even a few years ago, not so much.” Now, you can march into Lot One or the Busted Lift or Bartinis and Sundays find specialty ales and brews from producers Karaoke - Phoenix Entertainment, The Hangout, 9 p.m. - 3 a.m. like Millstream, down in Amana, or Old Capi- tal by Iowa City ... and they’re good, too. Tuesdays ‘Round Midnight Jazz w/ Bill Encke - Isabella’s, 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. And as you might expect by now, this isn’t ex- Pub Quiz - The Busred Lift, 8 p.m. First 3 Tuesday’s of the month. actly a small movement anymore. Anheuser- Loose Gravel Duo - Riverwalk Cafe, Grand Harbor, 5:30 p.m. - 7:30 p.m. I love beer. Beery beer beer. Busch has grabbed the bull by the horns, be- Drink it on down. coming a strong advocate of what it calls the Wednesdays “import, craft and specialty” (ICS) market — Open Mic - Hosted by the Dert Tones, The Busted Lift, 9 a.m. - 1a.m. Down into my belly. A-B sees it as so important, in fact, that it cre- Live on Main Comedy - 2 great standups, Bricktown, 9 p.m. - 11 p.m. Yum yum yum. ated a division in the company specifically to 3100 Club Comedy - Midway Hotel, Bricktown, 9 p.m. - 11 p.m. coordinate these newer brands. At Kirchhoff Dubuque Area Writer’s Guild Open Forum - 2nd Wed. (Isabella’s) 7 - 9p.m. by Tim Brechlin Distributing here in Dubuque, Peter Francois Live Comedy - 3100 Club Comedy Night, Midway Hotel, 8 p.m.- 10 p.m. is the ICS brand development manager. The Wundo Band - Pizzeria Uno Annex, Platteville, WI, 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. I’m going to tell you readers something that WJOD Wild West Wed - (Country Dancing), Fairgrounds, 7 p.m. - 11 p.m. may stun, shock, amaze and astound you all. Karaoke - Becky McMahon, Denny’s Lux Club 8:30 p.m. -12:30 a.m. This is something that will come as a com- Karaoke - C-N-T Ent., Second Wind, Galena, IL, 8:30 p.m. - 12:30 a.m. plete shock to anybody here in the Tri-States and beyond. Thursdays Live Music - Robbie Bahr & Laura McDonald, Gobbies, Galena, 9 p.m. -1a.m. I love beer. Y-105 Party Zone - Dbq Co. Fairgrounds, 7 p.m. - 10 p.m. Open Mic - Grape Harbor, 8 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. It’s great, isn’t it? All those different styles ... Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. ales, weissbiers, lagers, dunkels, pilsners, Karaoke - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. stouts (my personal favorite) ... there’s beer Karaoke - Becky McMahon, Ground Round, 9 p.m. - 12 a.m. out there for everybody of legal age, espe- Karaoke - Flyin’ Hawaiian, Shannon’s Bar, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. cially here in Dubuque. You’ve got people Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. homebrewing, you have people coming to- Karaoke - Soundwave, Bulldog Billiards, 9:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. gether for beer tastings, you have bars priding Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. themselves on having such massive selections DJ Music - DJ Brian Imbus, Jumpers, 8:30 p.m. - 1 a.m. available ... it’s a hell of a world out there. “It’s pretty simple: These beers are popular,” says Francois. “The craft beer segment had a Fridays But it wasn’t always that way, which is some- 9 percent jump in 2005, and Brewers Asso- Live Comedy - Arthur House Restaurant, Galena, 9 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. thing that we often seem to forget. Thirty Firewood Friday (3rd Friday’s) - Isabella’s Bar at the Ryan House, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. ciation numbers for the first half of 2006 in- years ago, beer here in the Midwest was Live Music - Riverwalk Cafe, Grand Harbor 5:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m. dicated an 11 percent jump over that. It’s the pretty much the old standbys that our parents Live Music - Leonardo Roldan/Romeo Bautista, Los Aztecas, 6 p.m. - 9 p.m. fastest-growing beer segment in the market.” would drink religiously: Hamm’s, Schlitz, Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. Not inconsiderable numbers by any means, PBR, Old Style, Miller, Bud (my grandfather Karaoke - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. and Anheuser-Busch agrees, bringing more always drank Blatz, and he’d buy Bud when Karaoke - Flyin’ Hawaiian, Sublime, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. than 50 new brands to the market in the past Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. it was for a celebration — it was the “special” year; Kirchhoff Distributing has taken on 25 Karaoke - C-N-T Entertainment, T.J’s Bent Prop, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. beer). It wasn’t until 1977, when a fellow of them here, and they’ve been popular. Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. named Michael Jackson (no, not THAT one) Karaoke - Brian Leib’s Essential Entertainment, Aragon Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. wrote a book called The World Guide to Beer, “The response has been just tremendous here Karaoke - Becky McMahon, Sandy Hook Tap, 10 p.m. -2 a.m. that most people were first introduced to the in the Dubuque area,” reports Francois. “We DJ Music - Main Event DJ, Gin Rickeys, 8:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. idea that there was a deliciously beery world had been hearing a lot about how custom- DJ Music - Sound Ideas DJ, Timmerman’s Supper Club, 8 p.m.-12 a.m. outside of the traditional American beers. In ers wanted a little more variety, so we began DJ Music - Renie B., George & Dales, East Dubuque 11 p.m. - 3 a.m. 1978, homebrewing was made legal by fed- floating the market, and the response and DJ Music - DJ Brian Imbus, Jumpers, 8:30 p.m. - 1 a.m. eral law. And then the floodgates opened. the demand just went through the roof.” Saturdays In 1983, there were 51 companies operating And with the enthusiastic response his own Live Comedy - Arthur House Restaurant, Galena, 9 p.m. - 10:30 p.m. a grand total of 80 breweries ... throughout store has seen since it opened this past July, Live Music - Leonardo Roldan/Romeo Bautista, Los Aztecas, 6 p.m. - 9 p.m. the entire country. As of December 1 of this Jerry Anderson sees Dubuque as one of Iowa’s Karaoke - Rainbow Lounge, Canfield Hotel, 7:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. year, there are ... wait for it ... 1,409 total leaders in the craft beer scene. “Let’s be hon- Karaoke - Riverboat Lounge, 8:30 p.m. - 12 a.m. breweries in the United States. Heck, even est: This is a beer-drinking town,” he says. Karaoke - C-Sharp, A&B Tap, 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. here in Iowa, we have sixteen of them! Of Karaoke - Dave Lorenz, Player’s Sports Bar, 9 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. course, we weren’t always at the forefront. And what a town it is. All you need to do is Karaoke - Starburst Karaoke, w/Dave Winders, Instant Replay, 9 p.m.-1a.m. wander down to Isabella’s at the Ryan House DJ Music - Main Event DJ, Gin Rickeys, 8:30 p.m. - 1:30 a.m. “It’s the same way as with a lot of other trends (1375 Locust) to see how “craft” beers are be- DJ Music - Sound Ideas DJ, Timmerman’s Supper Club, 8 p.m.-12 a.m. and styles,” says Jerry Anderson, owner of the continued on page 24 AREN’T OUR NEW HEADERS SWEET? 365 ROCKS, BABY! 13

d’oeuvres, a cash bar (yummy!), a gour- met dinner AND live entertainment (so, really, you’ve got everything squared away in one spot). Featured entertain- ment for the evening will be Julie Gold, a New York-based songwriter who’s Get your goldfinger ready penned tunes for Patti LaBelle, Kathy So, you like the symphony, right? Big fan Mattea, James Galway, Lea Salonga (she of wonderful music? Here’s your chance was Miss Saigon!), Cliff Richards and to not just enjoy some more wonderful more, including the 1991 Grammy-win- music but to also contribute to the orga- ning song “From a Distance,” performed nization that does so much for the music by Bette Midler. scene in the Tri-States. Reservations are required for the DSO It’s called A Touch of Gold, and it’s the Gala, and they’re required by Friday, Jan- second annual Dubuque Symphony uary 19. Fees are $100 per person, with a Orchestra gala event. It’ll go down on table for ten available for only $900. You Saturday, January 27, at 5:30 p.m. at the can make a reservation by calling up the Grand River Center, so start calling those DSO office at 563-557-1677. For more babysitters early. information on this Red House-spon- sored event, check out the DSO’s Web This fund-raising event will include hors site at www.dubuquesymphony.org.

Top 10 Busted Lift Shows of 2006 (alphabetical) courtesy of Aaron Hefel

1. Cinemechanica 10-22-06 2. The Crest 2-9-06 3. Diplomats of Solid Sound w/The Diplomettes 11-4-06 4. The Heavenly States 6-12-06 5. Joe Price 9-1-06 6. Johnny Dowd 7-30-06 7. Magnolia Electric Company 3-21-06 8. The Paper Chase 6-18-06 9. Pieta Brown w/Bo Ramsey 4-7-06 10. Watermelon Slim and the Workers 2-2-06

(Editor Tim’s Note: 365ink Publisher Bryce Parks’ impromptu jam with Johnny Cash tribute singer Scott Keeton during a Rocket Surgeons’ show is number 11. Because Bryce goes to 11. That’s how he rolls.) MOO JAVA MAKES ME MOO, BABY 14

wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am sort of selection, with options for coffee, tea and that’s it.

Of course, we couldn’t write about Moo Java without mentioning the friendly staff. (Hi, Breanna!) When you’ve got an operation that focuses exclusively on drive-thru service, obviously a primary 365’s Twelve Favorite Pizza Places concern needs to be customer service. When you pull up to either of the Moo (in Alphabetical Order? Oooh, how brave.) Java windows, you’re immediately Mooin’ for Moo Java greeted by a smiling face ... and that’s - Cafe Manna Java really one of the great selling No, the name isn’t a joke. It’s points of Moo Java. You’re - Cannova’s (Galena) a coffee joint! Or, more getting all the great-tasting, - Casey’s (Key West ... yes, a gas station has great pizza!) specifically, it’s two of them. delicious beverages you (It’s also a programming - Happy Joe’s could find at “normal” - Little Caesars (Crazy Bread smothered in cheese for the win) interface for application coffee shops, and you’re code, but before this also getting the great - Marco’s becomes far too nerdy customer service that keeps - Mario’s for our own good, we’re you coming back. So the - Pizzeria Uno (up in Platteville) stopping right there.) next time you’re running late for work, or you’re getting ready - Shot Tower In the event that you’re not familiar for a drive and you need a little pick- - Town Clock Inn with Moo Java, the company has two me-up ... give Moo Java a try. I won’t say locations. One is out on Highway 20, by you’ll be mooing, but you never know. the Wal-Mart, and the other is at 245 W. Stranger things have happened. 2nd Street, just off Locust, not too far from 365 World Headquarters. Sounding familiar now? Coffee Talk Tuesdays You can learn about this stuff? Get out! Moo Java, much like the Java Dreams establishment profiled in this space It’s time to get your Ph.D. in javanomics. recently, isn’t your typical walk-in, sit Starbucks is here to do it. down and enjoy a cup of something or other while jiving away on wireless It’s a program called Coffee Talk Tuesdays, Internet. No, it’s something else entirely. and it’s free and open to the public. It’s Moo Java is all about speed. Drive-thru pretty simple: Join Barista Dan as he speed. guides you through the confusing world of coffee beans and all the science-like All you have to do at Moo Java is drive stuff that goes into coffee. Which beans up to the window, and place your complement each other, taste-wise? Does order. And be prepared, because the the location where beans are grown affect selection at Moo Java is fantastic! Lattes, the taste of a cup of coffee? (Believe it or mochas, chai (not my personal favorite, not, it does.) This is a unique opportunity but it seems to be ridiculously popular to really cement for yourself what you around here), breves, smoothies, green like in a cup of coffee and to understand teas, gourmet (and by gourmet, I mean exactly what produces the taste that you delicious) coffees ... just because it’s a love oh, so very much. drive-through, that doesn’t mean it’s a WASN’T REPTAR A CHARACTER IN RUGRATS? 15

...AND AN ALT ROCK NEW YEAR Mike & Amy Finders The Mike and Amy Finders Band, that fantastic act by Aaron Hefel Cassius, For The Fallen Dreams, which has been producing great music for nearly Mourning Corvus, Overdose a decade now, are coming back to town, and tickets are going to be hot-hot-HOT.

Sunday, January 7 They’re hitting Isabella’s at the Ryan House on The Busted Lift, Doors at 5 p.m. January 20, and advance tickets are available. They’re only $10, and they’re available at the bar. This Metal/hardcore is in full swing this win- is a limited-seat engagement, with only 50 (that’s right, ter. On January 7, Lifeforce Records art- five-zero) tickets available, so act fast. ists Cassius(ex-Signs of Collapse) and Isabella’s, with its ridiculously Harlots, The Concubine, For the Fallen Dreams crush The Busted Lift. Mourning Corvus make their return huge beer list and a wide Smothering Angels, Reptar, variety of selections on tap to the Dubuque scene, and Lancaster, Won Mourning (including the old standby Wisconsin’s Overdose open the show. of Pabst Blue Ribbon), Tuesday, January 2 presents a unique and The Busted Lift, Doors @ 4 p.m. intimate setting, with evoca- Birthday Suits, Old Panther, tive lighting, a great staff and excellent acoustics. You Tech metal enthusiasts should take note Diversity Kids of January 2. Harlots (Milwaukee/Ohio) owe it to yourself and The Concubine (New Jersey) pro- to check out Thursday, January 11 vide bone-crushing hardcore that diz- concerts down The Busted Lift, Doors at 9 p.m. there, and espe- zies the mind. Both bands have new cially this one. records out on Corrosive Recordings. Birthday Suits (ex-Sweet Jap) are two Mike and Amy This will mark the 3rd time Harlots have Japanese Minneapolitans who play Finders pro- graced The Busted Lift’s stage. Local balls-out rock and roll without asking duce a blend of metal masters Smothering Angels will permission. Armed with only guitar and bluegrass, folk make a rare appearance for this show. drums, Birthday Suits have been tear- and country from The band has been taking time putting their home base in ing a path of debauched tomfoolery together a new record, pursuing other Iowa City ... and it’s through as much of the United States as projects, and living the life. Reptar, a really firkin’ good. possible. Next target: Dubuque, Iowa. newish local hardcore/thrash outfit, and Dubuque’s own Diversity Kids are defi- Isabella’s is located Won Mourning, doing the “get back to- nitely management material. Tight indie in the basement gether for Christmas” dance, will also rock and roll with an artsy twist. of the Ryan House perform. Take note of the early start! 16

Meadows Jamie’s Wines Country Smoke House from Spragueville $100 per couple Whether in Dubuque or Iowa will be catering a smoked beef or includes a deli- Galena, drop by Jamie’s pork plate for $7 a piece; Doors Will cious prime rib Wines for champaign Open at 6:00 PM so everyone can enjoy and chicken dinner buffet followed by and wine tastings featur- their meal early; Bring your own Refresh- entertainment and dancing from 7 p.m. ing the top 10 wines of ments; No Hard Liquor/Glass Bottles - 1 a.m. There will be a drawing for free 2006. Sounds tasty to us! Allowed; Children 10 & under must be membership and champagne at mid- with an Adult at all times; For Reserva- night. A great option for partying is As- tions: Call (662) 801-5741 or email at bury! Meadows is located at 15766 Clo- [email protected]. ver Lane, Dubuque, IA 52002. Phone 563-583-7385. Isabella’s New Year’s Party Isabella’s offers The Busted Lift a relaxed, low- The ever popular double New Year’s is Courtside impact celebra- $50 per per- back in full swing at the Busted Lift. First, tion to ring in son includes a they celebrate New Year’s in Ireland, the New Year. No need to get all dressed great buffet spread of food to nibble on which is 6 p.m. here, with terrific live up or spend a lot of money. Come as all night from chicken wings to meatballs Irish music by Wylde Nept. Plus food and Junior Board VNA you are, the no-cover party offers hors and much more. Plus, free beer and rail drink specials. Then either stick around or d’oeuvres, the usual eclectic selection of come back after a rest from 9 p.m. - 1 a.m. drinks all night long. It’ll keep you ener- New Year’s Eve Party Fountain Park Event Center music on vinyl, a free champagne toast for a rocking New Year’s even celebration gized for the big party featuring great par- Limited tickets are available to the public and shadow dancing behind a backlit at the lift featuring live music by one of ty rock and roll performed live by Zero 2 and reserved tickets are recommended. sheet for those bold enough to show off their favorite performers, David Zollo and Sixty. Fee free to indulge as complimen- The celebration will begin at 9:00 p.m. their best moves (you can even choose the Body Electric. There will be a tradi- tary limo service will see you safely home with appetizers, cash bar, a DJ, dancing, the music!). Non-alcoholic drinks are tional champagne toast at midnight. if needed throughout the evening. a countdown, a champagne toast and free for designated drivers and a local party favors. Raffle tickets to win a vaca- shuttle service will be available for those Bricktown The Captain Merry tion package, valued at $1500, will be needing a ride home. Basically, it’s a $55 per per- A memorable way to celebrate. available only at the New Year’s Eve cel- New Year’s Party, Isabella’s style! For son treats you to huge party areas on Gourmet dinner, beuatiful setting and ebration. Tickets for the event are $25. more information, call (563) 585-2049. the 2nd and third floor with access to stellar live salsa music by ochOsol. Please contact Jennifer, 583-6666 or the Deep and Fat Kat Lounge. Enjoy the $125/person or $250/couple includes Carrie, 556-3568 for more information now infamous all night hors d’oeuvres An Alternative Celebration party access and a five course pre-set and to purchase tickets. Shalom Retreat Center buffet, available through the night and dinner. (Two dinner seatings at 5:30 and Presenter: Fr. John Haugen If you like including grilled margarita lime shrimp 8 p.m.) If you would like to visit the Cap- to go out for New Year’s Eve, but aren’t skewers, teriyaki steak skewers, many Dubuque Greyhound tain Merry for the five course dinner only, into the “traditional night life,’ why not flavors of chicken wings, swedish meat- the cost is $75 per person. It includes 2 Park & Casino join them for an evening of food, fun, balls, stuffed mushrooms, mini egg rolls cocktails or wine. Or if you would like Classic rock and roll and prayer? It begins with a delicious and so very much more. (Seriously, the to party after dinner only, it’s just $50/ from Artie and the and relaxing dinner at 6:30, followed by list they sent us was huge and now I’m person which will Pink Catillacs. No time to reflect on the old and new years. hungry.) Extra special features include include 3 cocktails admission to get in, Then you will celebrate the Eucharistic a tower of cocktail shrimp & miniature or wine drinks, hors but you do need a Players Club Card. (It Liturgy and have a late night party! Bring crab claws, an atlantic Smoked salmon d’oeuvres and the is Required) Players Cards are free, and your personal 2006 and 2007 calendars display, a chocolate fountain featuring champagne toast at available at the Rich Rewards Center to use during the reflection time. Offer- delicious warm Swiss chocolate with an midnight. of the Casino anytime. Please get your ing: $25/person. Registration required by assortment of breads, fruits and goodies card in ADVANCE, so you don’t have to calling Shalom at 563-582-3592 or send for dipping. 4-hour Premium Open Bars wait in line, and you will also receive email to: [email protected]. including Bloody Mary bar, Martini bar, The Arena 100pts Free. The Elvis Show will start at The New Year’s and Blender bar. Live music fills the air 8:30, and Dance Sets to follow. It will be Eve bash features through the night with a special cigar a great nite, so join them, and you will live music from and card lounge area. And, of course, “Rock” the Casino for New Year’s Eve!!! party favors, noisemakers and a cham- Jabherbox and, pagne toast at midnight. Reserved table get this, over $2000 in cash and prizes. seating for 8 – 50 guests is available at Plus party favors and a champagne toast Mooney Hollow Barn a special price. Contact Laura at Brick- at midnight. And on this night the Arena is Cover Charge for New Years Eve is town for details. The party is limited to oepn until 4:30 a.m. It’s the party that lasts $13.00 a person which includes party 300 so book early! when all the others are dead and gone. favors and champange at midnight; Jim’s Up to date nightlife 24/7/365 www.dubuque365.com Bartini’s talented entertainer with a knack for con- No cover charge to keep you in one place necting with a crowd right from the start, all night long. Join Bartini’s for dancing to will be joined by Pat Reidy and The Lads. great DJ music and Champagne! Reidy and the Lads are known for their mix of Irish ballads and songs, patriotic tunes Melanie Sue Mausser and American folk classics. (And a certain Brewster’s Cafe - Shullsburg WI, 6 PM 365ink editor will be tending bar, as well.) New Year’s in Galena! Benjamin’s At 103 N. Main in downtown Galena, Eagle Ridge enjoy live entertainment (and karaoke!), Eagle Ridge will also be hosting a New a special holiday menu, champagne (al- Year’s Eve “Disco” party on December ways a nice touch) and party favors. 31 at 7:30 p.m., a high-energy (but still classy) gala with food, beverages and en- Fried Green Tomatoes tertainment ... and kids are also welcome We’re told the big party on Main Street in at a Disco Fever party designed just for Galena will be at Fried Green Tomatoes. them! Reservations are required in ad- Call soon for required reservations and vance (for $125; $50 for the kids’ party), complete party details(815)777-3938. and can be made by calling the Eagle Ridge Resort & Spa at 815-777-5050. There will be live music from Ralphm Kluseman and Mike Mason from 9-1 to Frank O’Dowd’s Irish Pub ring in the new year. And, of course, the at the Irish Cottage. Gerry O’Connell, a most amazing food you can imagine. Grand New Year’s Eve A family fun night sponsored by LT Amuse- ments & Premier Bank. 30,000 square feet of carnival style fun at The Grand River Center from 5 - 10 p.m. on New Year’s Eve. Tickets are $8 in advance or $10 at the door, adults and children under three are free. Get tix @ Kwik Stop locations. Sup- ports Project Concern and Colt Cadets. Julien Inn Grand Ballroom Larry Busch and the Buschwackers Swing Band will bring the party mood while par- ty Favors, a champagne toast and midnight breakfast buffet will round out the night nicely. Tickets only $40.00 per couple. Gin Rickeys Featuring all the party supplies and mu- sic from DJ Spanky. 8:30 PM - 1:30 AM A Heavey Metal New Year at Sublime Perimeter Burn, Strych 9, Enemy II All, 2 West perform live with doors opening at 7:30 $5. Show, 8:30 PM - 1:45 AM More New Year’s Fun... LiviN’ Large NO COVER - NEW YEAR’S EVE! @ Denny’s Lux Club, 9 PM - 1 AM Massey Road 3100 Club, starting at 8:00 PM A Pirate Over 50 @ Fat Tuesday’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Fever River String Band @ Anton’s Saloon, 9 PM - 12:30 AM Madhouse Krazy Kooters, Epworth, 9 PM - 1 AM Mr. Obvious Doolittle’s, Lancaster, 9:30 PM - 2 AM Horsin’ Around Band Budde’s, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM Jabherbox The Arena, 11 PM - 3 AM Up to date nightlife 24/7/365 www.dubuque365.com 18

Sunday, January 7 The One Hat Band Thursday, December 28 Saturday, December 30 Friday, January 5 New Diggings Store, 3:30 PM - 7:30 AM Cassiuss, For the Fallen Dreams, Mourn- Tribe of Two Massey Road Jabherbox ing Corvus, Overdose The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM 3100 Club, 8 PM - 12 AM Jumpers, 9 PM - 1 AM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Zero 2 Sixty Denny Garcia Friday, December 29 Dagwoods, 9 PM - 1 AM Isabella’s, 9 PM - 1 AM Wednesday, January 10 One Hat Band Betty and the Headlights One Hat Band The Wundo Band Isabella’s, 7 PM - 11 PM Denny’s Lux Club, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Pizzeria Uno, 9 PM - 12 PM Old Panther, Nate Jenkins, Worn Out The Rick Tittle Band Big Muddy The Dertones Shoes, (Operation New View Benefit) Thumbs Up Pub and Grill, 9 PM - 1 AM Murph’s South End Tap, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Stillhouse Thursday, January 11 Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Saturday, January 6 Truckstop Souvenir Denny Troy BadFish Gin Rickeys, 8 PM - 11 PM Jumpers, 9 PM - 1 AM Mississippi Mug, 3 PM - 5 PM The Legends Open Mic Feature Performers Center Stage(a.k.a.) The Shiz Isabella’s / Ryan House, 8 PM - 12 AM Budde’s, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM 3100 Club/Midway Hotel, 8 PM - 12 AM Melanie Sue Mausser Birthday Suits, Old Panther, Diversity Kids NEW YEAR’S EVE Grape Escape, 8 PM - 11 PM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM The Du-Rocks Ralph, Johnnie & Mike (See Page 16 & 17) Friday, January 12 Riverwalk Lounge/Grand Harbor Resort The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1AM 5:30 PM - 9:30 PM Tuesday, January 2 Art of the Covenant, Underground Trio Becky McMahon & the All For Fun Band The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1AM Denny Troy Loose Gravel duet Happy’s Place, 8:30 PM - 12:30 AM Riverwalk Lounge/Grand Harbor Resort Jodi Splinter & Kevin Beck The Galleria, 7 PM - 10 PM Zero 2 Sixty from 5:30 PM - 7:30 PM 3100 Club/Midway Hotel, 8 PM - 12 AM The Dert Tones Denny’s Lux Club, 9 PM - 1 AM Harlots, The Concubine, Reptar, Smother- Blue Willow (Bob Welch & Helen Reisen) George and Dale’s, 8 PM - 12 AM The Rick Tittle Band ing Angels, The Busted Lift, 5 PM - 9 PM Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Massey Road The Pit Stop, 9 PM - 1 AM 3100 Club, 8 PM - 12 AM Left of Center Wednesday, January 3 Three Thieves Jumpers, 9 PM - 1 AM Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM Artie & The Pink Catillacs The Wundo Band Red N Deb’s, Platteville, 9 PM - 1 AM Pizzeria Uno, 9 PM - 12 AM Perimeter Burn Saturday, January 13 The Arena, 9 PM - 1:45 AM Ken Wheaton Open Mic w/ The Dertones Three Thieves Grape Harbor, 9 PM - 12 AM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1 AM Horsin’ Around Band Mississippi Mug, 3 PM - 5 PM Nick Stika Jumpers, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM Thursday, January 4 The Rick Tittle Band Grape Escape, 9 PM - 1 AM 3100 Club/Midway Hotel, 8 PM - 12 AM The Lovemonkeys Open Mic Feature Performers Isabella’s / Ryan House, 8 PM - 12 AM Justin Morrissey Band Budde’s, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM The Busted Lift, 9 PM - 1AM Open Mic Night Saturday, December 30 Grape Harbor, 8 PM - 10:30 PM The Legends Dagwoods, 8:30 PM - 12:30 AM The Bent Scepters The Busted LIft, 9 PM - 1 AM Friday, January 5 Scarlet Runner Knicker’s Saloon, 9 PM - 1 AM Denny Troy & Rick Hoffman Daylight Savings Account Riverwalk Lounge / Grand Harbor Re- BadFish Mississippi Mug, 3 PM - 5 PM sort, 5:30 PM - 9:30 PM Budde’s, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM Left of Center Julien’s Bluff Melanie Sue Mausser Budde’s, 9:30 PM - 1:30 AM Thumser’s 19th Hole, 8 PM - 12 AM Dagwoods, 8:00 PM - 12 AM Sunday, January 14 2-West Tribe of Two Massey Road The Dert Tones The Arena, 11 PM - 3 AM Grape Escape, 8 PM - 1 AM 3100 Club, 8 PM - 12 AM New Diggings Store, 3:30 PM - 7:30 PM YO ADRIAN, PLEASE FORGET ABOUT ROCKY 5! 19

Rocky Balboa Eragon A Film by Sylvester Stallone A Film by Stefen Fangmeier (Directorial debut) In this (apparent) conclusion to the Academy Award- Eragon (Edward Speleers) is a farm boy living in the vil- THE BUZZ winning Rocky saga, legendary boxer Rocky Balboa lage Carvahall in the fictional and magical world of Al- - In a sign that perhaps the world may (Sylvester Stallone, obviously) has found something of a agaësia, ruled by the maniacal King Galbatorix (John not be ending after all, the cast of Rob life outside of the ring. Following the death of his wife, Malkovich). When the 17-year-old boy discovers a pol- Zombie’s remake of Halloween isn’t Adrian, due to cancer, Rocky has opened up an Italian ished blue stone, he thinks he’s merely stumbled upon a shaping up to be half bad, after the recent restaurant and spends his nights nice treasure for a farm boy. His delight announcement that Malcolm McDowell regaling customers with old fight turns to shock, however, when this stone will assume the role of Dr. Loomis, played stories from days gone by. But the turns out to be a dragon egg, when drag- by Donald Pleasance in the John Carpenter original. heart of the fighter is rekindled ons had been thought to be extinct for Now Danielle Harris, who played Jamie Lloyd, Laurie when ESPN runs a simulated box- ages. A dragon named Saphira emerges Strode’s daughter, in several Halloween sequels, is ru- ing match pitting Rocky in his from the egg, and Eragon’s life is turned mored to be in talks to play Laurie Strode herself. prime against current champion upside-down, as he has made the dis- Mason “The Line” Disxon (An- covery of a lifetime, a legacy nearly as - After seemingly endless speculation since tonio Tarver) ... and the computer old as the Empire itself. When one day the show ended in 2004, Kim Cattrall has says Rocky would win. After Rocky he finds his uncle dead, Eragon sets out told writers that she is open to the idea of gets his boxing license back, hop- to avenge him. Accompanied by a wise a Sex and the City film. A film version was ing to get into some local competi- but enigmatic storyteller named Brom originally planned for production shortly tion, Dixon’s promoters approach (Jeremy Irons), Eragon and Saphira take after the show’s final season, but plans ul- Rocky and make him a tempting up the legacy of legendary dragon riders, timately collapsed after Cattrall was reportedly unwill- offer: A 10-round exhibition in Las learning the skills of magic, swordfight- ing to appear. Stars Sarah Jessica Parker, Cynthia Nixon Vegas with the champ. Against the ing and dragon-riding in preparation for and Kristin Davis are all ready to go. advice of both his son Robert (Milo his revenge against those responsible for Ventimiglia) and Paulie, Rocky ac- the death of his family. He eventually - Why, Hollywood, why? Paramount Pic- cepts the challenge and reunites joins the forces of the Varden, rebels de- tures, apparently eager to blow scores with trainer Duke to get back into termined to overthrow the king Galbato- of cash for no reason whatsoever, has fighting shape. rix, and this journey will culminate in an assigned a screenwriter to begin devel- epic battle that may determine the future oping a third installment in the video Amazingly, for a sequel that was of the land. game-inspired Tomb Raider franchise. seemingly not asking to be made, There’s no word on a director, whether series star Rocky Balboa might be the best The success of the book series Eragon Angelina Jolie would return or how much alcohol entry in the series after the origi- surprised many, as it came from the mind was involved in this decision-making process. nal film. It provides a fitting and of a 15-year-old boy (the author began genuine conclusion to the long writing the book when he was 15; he - Retro seems to be back, for now both saga that is the Italian Stallion ... was 19 when it was first published). It has AMC and Batman Begins director Chris and let us just say, for the record, captured an army of followers all await- Nolan are developing separate remakes for a 60-year-old man, Sylvester ing the same experience from the new of the classic television show The Pris- Stallone is ripped with muscles film. Enter the real 15-year-olds, the hol- oner. Nolan aims to bring the series to that would make any man envi- lywood movie makers. This film deserved the big screen in a two-hour film, while ous. This is a movie that had the another hour of character development. AMC is producing at least six episodes of a mod- potential to be a real joke — a It’s not by any means the same depth of ern-day reimagining. The Prisoner originally ran for 60-year-old climbing into the ring tale as, for example, Lord of the Rings by 17 episodes back in the ‘60s, telling the story of a with a 30-year-old and hoping to any stretch, but the books’ success came former government agent who wakes up with no be taken seriously? But between from the believability and likeability of memory of arriving in a mysterious Village. Stallone’s ridiculous physical the characters: A group of vulnerable - Romeo + Juliet director Baz Luhrmann conditioning and the great efforts and, in the end because of their fears, has begun filming on his next film, Aus- made to acknowledge that yes, courageous heroes. Not so in Eragon the tralia, starring Australians Nicole Kidman this is a man who is well past his movie. While the cast is strong, with tal- and Hugh Jackman. Australia will tell re- fighting prime,Rocky Balboa never delves into the realm ented actors, they all look vaguely embarrassed to be volve around an English aristocrat who of self-parody. It’s great to see old friends like Paulie and in a movie with such an insipid script. (Though Irons, inherits a property in the Northern Terri- Duke again (Duke providing his same old bad-ass treat- with Dungeons & Dragons already under his belt and tory of Australia in the midst of World War II. ment), and the relationship between Rocky and his son now this tripe, really needs to get new management.) is a highlight of the film. Let’s be honest, here: The Rocky With a group of 7 to 10-year-olds, the consensus in the movies have never been about making high art or re- theater lobby was, “Cool dragon, why didn’t they follow Carmike ally daring epics. They’re about an ordinary man doing the book?” In the end Eragon, the movie, is a shame for Kennedy Mall 6 extraordinary things, going the distance against unbe- its young fans. It’s another glitzy over-produced action 555 JFK, Dubuque, IA lievable odds. Or, as Rocky himself puts it, “It’s about affair devoid of the true story, with occasional nods to 563-588-9215 how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.” So readers of the books, rather than a memorable entertain- sit back, enjoy the standbys like that classic theme and ment experience. Nice acting and beautifully shot, but I Millennium Cinema the inevitable training montage, and step into the ring only wish that next time they would have listened to the 151 Millennium Drive with Rocky one last time. (And let’s all try to forget about 15-year-old. 2835 NW Arterial, Platteville, WI Rocky V.) Dubuque, 1-877-280-0211 or 563-582-7827 608-348-4296 Carmike Avalon Cinema Cinema Center 8 95 E Main St. 75 JFK, Dubuque, IA Platteville, WI 563-588-3000 608-348-5006 WE’RE A GREAT PLACE, IT’S TIME TO PARTY LIKE IT’S 1699! 20

partment; America’s River Phase II Plans business growth, and inspire business re- are announced “including a new Dia- location. We do this by recognizing the mond Jo Casino and expanded National importance of enhanced entertainment, River Museum and Aquarium.”; Ice Arena diverse job opportunities, affordable liv- proposed in the McAleece Sports Com- ing, and the city’s continued progress to- plex; Grand Opera House gets a million ward “green community” sustainability. dollar facelift; A. Y. McDonald Park is ded- icated; “Science in the Schools Day” for Why? Research proves that colleges pro- 900+ 4th graders from the public and pa- duce talent (and Dubuque is a higher ed- rochial schools held at Grand River Cen- ucation nucleus in the state) and a “cre- ter; Gronen Restoration signs new tenants ative” city retains it. And most young on renovated and refurbished Main Street professionals will not take a dream job progressive thinking, partnerships and properties; Eleanor Roosevelt and Maz- in a town that doesn’t provide adequate Reflections 2006 services you consistently provide for the zuchelli Middle Schools open and the new social life. Affordability is the secret by Mayor Roy D. Buol betterment of our community. Washington Carver Elementary School is ingredient that unbuckles restraints on under construction; Carnegie Stout Public economic growth. Of significance is “If you don’t know where you Library announces fundraising campaign the sustainable “green” community that are going, any road will take you for renovation and expansion; GDDC’s serves to improve life quality…as well as there.” River Valley Initiative reached and sur- the economy in becoming a job “engine” - Lewis Carroll passed the five year goals of creating 5100 for the 21st century careers that will and new jobs and $200 million in new com- already are coming from recycling and Since I was elected as your mayor a little mercial construction; Dubuque chosen as remanufacturing of goods and producing more than a year ago, I’ve talked regularly an “Iowa Great Place!” renewable sources of energy. about my belief that “the next five years will define the next 50 for Dubuque.” Cit- New Year’s Resolution: The “tipping point” to prosperity occurs izens are beginning to believe too, and I As we head into 2007, I resolve to provide when these factors combine. am privileged each and every day to work leadership that remains focused on the key Happy New Year, Dubuque! with city and community leaders who issues that produce the solutions our citi- share a vision about where we are going. zens want and deserve. For the long term, “When we tug on a single thing we must think creatively in order to retain 2020 Vision Statement, and attract highly skilled talent, providing in Nature, we find it attached to City of Dubuque the type of atmosphere to support local everything else.” – John Muir “The city of Dubuque is a progressive, sus- tainable city with a strong balanced econ- omy and connections to the world. The Dubuque community takes pride in our history and heritage, and has actively pre- Let us pause to reflect on some of the served our picturesque river and communi- “headlines” of 2006: (Take a deep breath, ty. Dubuque citizens have choices of qual- ity livable neighborhoods and fun things its a long list) to do, and are engaged in the community. New and expanded business announce- Dubuque city government is financially ments…John Deere Dubuque Works; sound and providing services with citizens Namasco Corp; McGraw-Hill Higher getting value for their tax dollars.” Education; Sedgwick Claims Management Five-year goals: Services; Kunkel Bounds & Associates; • Improved connectivity: transportation Straka Johnson Architects; Theisens; Giese & communications Manufacturing; Dubuque Screw; Cotting- • Diverse, strong Dubuque economy ham & Butler; City’s real estate market •Planned and managed growth growth outpaces national averages; An • Partnering for a better Dubuque Envision 2010 project, the Crescent Com- • Riverfront development munity Health Center, opens its doors while others are in different phases of re- Top priorities: search or development; Phase one of the • Street program: Continuation Dubuque County Emergency Responder and funding Training Facility is completed; Westside • Workforce development strategy annexation of 700+ acres is final; The first • Green City Designation phase of the Iowa 32 Bike/Hike Trail Proj- • Americans with Disability Act, ADA, ect is underway with linkages to city parks Compliance and recreation areas; “Art on the River” • Library Renovation inaugural event was celebrated in the Port To my colleagues on the city council … of Dubuque; Former Pack site is being thank you for your tireless efforts in al- prepared for development; the Star Brew- ways putting the interests of Dubuque’s ery renovation continues with two major citizens first. While no public servant tenants committed; and plans for a mixed can promise perfection, each of us shares use project in the Port (business, retail, an obligation to continue the progress housing) managed by Platinum Services, we certainly have made in this past year. Wayne Briggs; Dubuque Federal Building To our city manager and staff, and all to be renovated and house the City Coun- our city employees … I am proud of the cil Chambers and the City’s Housing De- WE CHALLENGE MOLLY GROVER TO A GAME OF PING-PONG 21

education. I grew up around teaching, I thing in the world. fices with pitchforks.) She’s so much of a appreciated it.” In fact, her grandmother “We’re going to be so close to all the fan, in fact, that she named her youngest was a teacher at both Hempstead and Se- Midwest activities now,” she says with son after him. Payton is 6 years old. nior here in Dubuque. a hint of excitement. “And my kids have missed snow.” (Sorry, Molly: Haven’t had “It was his rookie year, and he kind of Out of college, she began working for too much of that lately.) got me into football,” Molly says. “And NutriSystem as a nutritionist (imagine right from the start, I was just struck by that), eventually working her way up into Of course, she has other ways to have his humbleness and his humility. He management, with occasional substitute fun: In addition to “the girly stuff like was just the mix of pure talent and a teaching jobs on the side. But before shopping and going to spas” (her wonderful human being ... you can long, she had a child, taught for a while words, not mine) and playing a mean learn a lot from someone like that. I ... and then she found the work that has game of ping-pong, Molly Grover is an did.” now become her career. aspiring Iron Chef, from the sounds of it. After she told me that she loves to The Riverboat Lounge at the Julien might “Or rather,” she says, “Chamber work cook, I threw her a curveball and asked found me.” also want to look out, as Molly not only her what her signature dish might be. listens to music nearly all the time, but It was a natural development, Molly (Hey, every good bartender has a sig- she is a self-proclaimed undiscovered found, from her education degree, tak- nature drink ... cooks are the same way, American Idol. (Her husband says “wan- ing the lessons she learned from teaching right?) It took her a minute, but with the nabe,” but we’ll give her the benefit of and funneling them into her Chamber help of her husband, she named two the doubt. Karaoke on the weekends, work. “At its core, teaching is all about dishes that had me nearly salivating Molly!) leadership,” she says. “Kids look up to into my BlackBerry: A Japanese chicken a role model, they look to a leader ... dish (sticky caramelized chicken), and Personally, I think she’ll fit right in. “I the teacher. When you’re working in a biscuits with a red-eye gravy ... with a have a passion and I have a love for the Chamber, you’re trying to create a vision, twist. “It’s a family recipe,” she reports, Tri-States,” she says. “Dubuque is the A new year, a new you’re trying to shape the future of your being careful to keep the biggest details place to be in Iowa, it’s the place to go ... community as best you can, and you’re confidential. “Passed on through gen- and for me, it’s home. We’ve never had Chamber president erations ... it’s more of a spicy sausage by Tim Brechlin trying to get people to see that vision.” the opportunity to be so close to fam- cream gravy than your typical Southern ily before, and that’s always seemed to It doesn’t seem too long ago that the And she loves the work that she does. gravy.” be one of the hallmarks of Midwest life: Dubuque Area Chamber of Commerce “Working in a Chamber is ... an unbeliev- She’s also a huge Walter Payton fan. family.” began the search process for a new presi- able job,” she says. “It’s great to be able (Pause, as hordes of Vikings and Packers dent ... but it was way back in June that to serve such a wide variety of needs for fans begin marching on the Chamber of- Yeah, she can stay. Steward Sandstrom left our city to take a people from so many different walks of position in Kalamazoo. life, from start-ups to established corpo- Well, as you may have heard last month, rations. It’s so interesting to see relation- the search is over, and the new president ships develop, and it’s so rewarding to of our Chamber of Commerce isn’t new to see the benefit from some of the littlest the Tri-States at all. Meet Molly Grover. things you can do ... I love that every day is different, I love the unpredictability, I “I moved around a lot as a child, but I’ve love the fast pace, and I love challeng- always felt Dubuque to be home,” she es ... but most of all, I love the people. says during a telephone interview. “We People make a chamber. There aren’t too moved probably every four or five years, many full-time employees working at but I was born here. This is where my Chambers of Commerce, but there are roots are.” tons of volunteers, and at the end of the day, they truly are the organization.” Her roots really are here; her parents, now retired in Bellevue, both worked at After stints as a Chamber president in long-standing Dubuque institutions. Her Oregon, Illinois, and then Rochelle, Illi- father, a Loras graduate, was a worker nois (just off I-88, not too far west of De at the Pack, and her mother was a John Kalb, for those keeping score at home), Deere employee. Molly lived here for Molly’s most recent position was running two years, and then moved to Indiana ... the Cartersville-Bartow County Chamber the first of many transitions. of Commerce in Georgia for the past four years. (It’s about 45 miles northwest of Though Molly (born Mary Elizabeth; “My Atlanta.) parents wanted to name me after a saint,” she says) has spent 11 years working for “It’s kind of an ironic twist, looking back,” various Chambers of Commerce and she says. “My tenure in Georgia began at now proudly considers herself a career the same time my work in Dubuque will Chamber person, this wasn’t what she be starting, right around the new year.” originally planned to do. No, she wanted to be a teacher. But don’t think that just because she’s a career Chamber worker, that’s all she has “I went to Winona State University, and it time for. Molly counts herself as a fam- was kind of a family tradition,” she says, ily woman first and foremost. With two laughing. “My grandmother went there, children of her own, as well as a stepson, two aunts went there, an uncle went she considers spending time with her there ... and I got a degree in elementary husband and children to be her favorite 365 Classifieds 23 To place classified ads simply call 563-588-4365. Walk Yourself Apartments / Real Estate Jobs A&W seeks p/t associates, flexible hours, good ref- erences req., pay based on experience. Call Tina at 563-556-8050, ext. 105.

efutures.com Broker Employment Opportunities: The individual we seek has the following attributes: Outstanding communication skills, with emphasis on telephone skills, High ethical and moral standards, Highly mo- tivated and self-starter, Enthusiastic, positive work by Megan Dalsing RD, LD attitude, Positive customer focus Numbers and de- tail oriented. A series 3 commodity broker license is THIN required -- will train right candidate. This position You can walk yourself offers excellent potential to grow with growth in thin with a brisk 30- to the business. Benefits include 401K, profit sharing 40-minute walk every and health insurance. Contact John at (jsorensen@ efutures.com) (608-348-5980 ext.107) day. All you need is a APARTMENTS good pair of walking Diamond Jo Casino shoes. Keep track of New Construction Homes in Eagle Valley Subdi- vision. (Just off of Roosevelt) Quality builder who Employment Opportunities your steps with a qual- stands by his work. 3 Bedroom Split Foyer. 2 car ity pedometer avail- Barback to start immediately. This is an on-call po- neighbors? Probably not often enough garage, hardwood floors, eat-in kitchen + many ex- sition including a competitive salary. able at your favorite Hy-Vee store. Start tras. $159,900. Call Matt at Booth Properties, 563- and perhaps they would love to get the with 2,000 steps a day and work up to 557-1000, today to take a look. Housekeepers to start immediately. On-call posi- exercise too. Invite them to join you. tions are available. 10,000. A mile is equivalent to 2,000 Carefree Condo Living Dishwashers to start immediately. Part-time and steps. Five miles equal 10,000 steps. Comes with this spacious 3 bed-room, 2 bath con- on-call positions available. • How about your kids? Everyone do in convenient location. Enjoy the 2,000 + square Walking every day can help you look needs exercise and being a good ex- feet including master bath suite and sun room. 2nd Bartender to start immediately. This is a part time better, feel better and add more life to floor unit with elevator in building, 13 x 34 foot tan- position. ercise role model will help them their your years. dem basement garage, deck and additional base- Diamond Club Representative. This is a part time entire lives. You’ll probably find a new ment storage room. Only $169,900. Call Matt at position. and effective way to communicate with Booth Properties, 563-557-1000, for a peek today. To get started, simply clip the pedom- For the above positions visit Diamond Jo the family. eter onto your waistband directly in Travel a Lot? Casino, 3rd Street Ice Harbor, ore-mail • How about the dog? Fido needs to Then consider this delightful 2 bedroom, 2 bath [email protected] line with your knees. Set the counter work the muscles too so help him out. condo at charming Coventry Park. Garden unit with to zero at the beginning of each day. newer kitchen and one car detached garage. All ap- You will probably need to schedule Wanted To Buy Wear it from the time you get up in the pliances remain. Care free living for only $114,900. some time for a walk, just like you Call Matt at Booth Properties, 563-557-1000, for Guns Wanted to Buy. Old, new, antique, rare. One morning until you go to bed at night. worry-free living today. or an entire collection. 563-590-9817 would for an important appointment. All real estate advertising in this newspaper is subject Besides making you thinner, Set some goals and reward yourself Items For Sale to the Federal Fair Housing Act which makes it illegal to ad- walking will: vertise “any preference, limitation or discrimination based when you meet them. La Z Boy wall-away reclining sofa and loveseat. Ex- on race, color, religion, sex, handicap, familial status or cellent condition. Multi-color on light backround. national origin or an intention to make any such prefences, • Boost your metabolism and help con- $350/pair. 563-556-7378. limitations or discrimination.” This newspaper will not • How does a nice massage sound when knowingly accept any advertising for real estate which is in trol your appetite. you reach your first 50,000 miles? HOT TUB, new in box, w/ warranty. Colored lights, violation of the law. Dwellings advertised in this newspaper waterfall, $1975. 563-451-2689 Can deliver. are available on an equal opportunity basis. To report dis- crimination, call HUD at 800-669-9777. • Exercise will improve you self confi- • Go try on smaller-size pants when dence and mental alertness. you lose 5 pounds. • Need stress relief? Exercise is the • Go to an afternoon movie when ticket. you’ve exercised every day for a week. • Need more energy? Once again, ex- A regular exer- ercise will give you a boost throughout cise regime will the day. help keep you healthier throughout your lifetime. It’s • Need a good night’s sleep? Exercise never too late to start. You should check daily – but it is not recommended right with a medical professional before be- before bed. ginning a new program. Visit Hy-Vee for new flyers with information about Take others along for the fun of it. losing weight. We care about your health and will help anyway we can. • How often do you get to see your HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO BRING SEXY BACK WITHOUT A RECEIPT? 23

next year, you must write it down. By New Years Goals writing it down, you are ten times more likely to achieve it. It is simple to put it The holidays always signal a time in writing. Grab a piece of paper and of reflection and many people start write this down. THIS WILL BE THE thinking about New Year’s resolutions. YEAR I ______(insert Most New Year’s resolutions are not your one big goal here). only broken by the end of January, If your goal is not in writing, then you many are just plain forgotten as well. do not have a goal. It is a dream that The key is to not make a bunch of New gets crowded out by everything else in Year resolutions, instead, pick just one your head. Putting your goal in writing and make it your main goal that you are makes it real and much more likely to willing to commit to for an entire year. be accomplished. Writing it down kick What do you really want to accomplish starts the incredible goal achieving next year? Here is a list of popular capabilities you have by activating the resolutions that are typically forgotten power of your mind. Keep this goal by early February. on you at all times and do whatever it takes to accomplish it. Put it on your - Lose Weight cell phone, use it as a screen saver and - Spend Time with Family and Friends tape it to your bathroom mirror. - Regular Exercise - Quit Smoking Picking one big goal for next year will - Enjoy Life More virtually guarantee a brighter future. - Quit Drinking Imagine if you got out of debt, lost - Get Out of Debt weight, or quit smoking next year? - Learn Something New Would it be a successful year? It will - Help Others be the most important thing you ever - Get Organized do and you’ll be surprised what you A Million + Visitors a Year... Are You One? accomplish when you focus. When you work on a bunch of goals at the same time, you run the risk of If you don’t have one big goal for failing on all of them. Pick one big the coming year, pick one now and one and give it everything you’ve got. commit to doing all the necessary Giving everything you have toward thing to achieving it. Doing this is often accomplishing a goal is a great what separates the successful from the feeling. Simply commit to doing all the average. You will be surprised with the necessary things to achieve your goal. results. It will be the most important Once you’ve picked your big goal for thing you do next year.

1% Mattitude Improvement Tip Who’s In Charge? You! Look around. Can you identify who will be the next in charge? Is it you? Are you ready to be in charge? Over Are you ready? the next 5 to 10 years, established companies will be losing close to 50% Improving your life, even just by 1 percent, can make all the difference! of their top level talent to retirement. Remember, not every tip will work During that same time, there will be for everyone. What tips do you use to a decline in the number of people to improve your life? Please take an active promote. Leaders will be retiring by the part of this community. If you have a droves and there will be fewer people useful tip, I encourage you to send it to me so others can benefit. Simply send available to replace them. Leadership tips to: [email protected]. will be short supply and high demand. Does your business or organization need Mattitude? Contact Matt today at 563-590-9693 or e-mail [email protected]. SANTA AND BEER... ON THE SAME PAGE... I MUST HAVE BEEN GOOD THIS YEAR! 24

who told them that her whole life, she photos of all of their “children” with them. ’ had waited to see Santa and Mrs. Claus. Whats Your Story? “I kept all the letters to Santa until I had Barb said that she and Jack play the too many to keep,” Barb said. Jack and Barb’s story That started many years of Santa and Mrs. Claus’ because they enjoy making ev- Claus. We recruited our grown children eryone happy. “We love the kiddies … The most real things in the world are by Ellen Goodmann to drive us around … one year we had an young and old.” those that neither children nor men can Elf and Rudolph to accompany us. One The season has fully descended upon us. see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on of the first years we made 25 stops on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no Days of little bows and large tummies; Christmas Eve … another time, the sched- scattered giftwrap and pink-nosed carol- proof that they are not there. Nobody ule blew out of the car and we made all can conceive or imagine all the wonders ers; poofy dresses and new year babies. the stops by memory, snow and all.” Days of reflection. Of spirit. Of giving. there are unseen and unseeable in the Of new beginnings. Of magic. Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They world. have been affected by the skepticism of “If we see a smile, get a hug or a little The “spirit of Santa Claus” was immortal- a skeptical age. They do not believe ex- kiss … then we gave the spirit as Santa ized in the New York Sun in 1897 in re- cept they see… In this great universe of and Mrs. Claus,” Barb said. She added sponse to a letter to the editor from little ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his that she and Jack would love to see their Virginia … intellect as compared with the boundless own children carry on the Santa and Mrs. world about him, as measured by the in- “He exists as certainly as love and gener- Claus tradition, as they were encouraged telligence capable of grasping the whole osity and devotion exist, and you know she and Jack over the years. that they abound and give to your life its of truth and knowledge. “We always give our best showing. We highest beauty and joy.” Jack and Barb have weaved their way never promise what we cannot give, and through Dubuque, East Dubuque, Cuba He also exists in the Tri-States. And so Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as we do give everyone our love,” she said. City and Galena. They have also gone does his wife. well not believe in fairies. You might get What a wonderful way to live. through four sets of homemade Santa your papa to hire men to watch in all the Jack and Barb (who wish to keep their and Mrs. Claus costumes while doing chimneys on Christmas eve to catch San- Alas! how dreary would be the world if last name anonymous) stepped into the so. From marching in parades to visiting ta Claus, but even if you did not see San- there were no Santa Claus! It would be large black boots of Santa and Mrs. Claus nursing homes and hospitals, “anywhere ta Claus coming down, what would that as dreary as if there were no Virginias. 25 years ago. we were wanted, we went,” Barb said. prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that There would be no childlike faith then, is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. no poetry, no romance to make tolerable “In 1981, Jack decided that he wanted They have, for years, like clockwork, ap- this existence…Thank God! he lives and to play Santa for some of our friends,” peared in the East Dubuque round school One of Jack and Barb’s most beloved Christ- lives forever. A thousand years from now, Barb said. “The first year I drove the car gymnasium arriving by fire truck. They mas traditions included attending Mass Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from and Jack went into homes as Santa; so have descended the 4th Street Elevator to at their parish. “We did this in a reverent now, he will continue to make glad the my friend helped me make a Mrs. Claus greet a street full of families. They have manner, show the goodness (of the spirit heart of childhood. dress – allowing me to join in the fun. visited with the little 101-year-old nun of giving),” Barb said. They have heaps of

Craft Beers politan selection of beers, and the coop- like wine. Anybody can go to “I don’t just sell home- continued from page 12 eration from retailers and bars has been a beer tasting or approach brewing supplies here ginning to take their hold on the drinking just fantastic,” says Francois. someone like Greg Olson ... I’m serving as a scene in the area. With about umpteen down at Isabella’s and reference. I’m tell- (Being a veteran of many a late night at a ask the self-proclaimed ing the guy down billion bottled beers and a great selection few establishments, I can vouch for myself of drafts, Isabella’s seems to have assumed “beer snob” how to the street why that some of these new brands like Tiger start expanding one’s he was surprised the mantle of being the leader of the pack, Lager have been selling like gangbusters.) so to speak, when it comes to digging up beer horizons. Enthusi- when he drank a exotic and lesser-known craft and micro- “I think it’s taken hold because this is re- asts want to share their beer that’s the same brews. In fact, it’s even ally just a nice, progressive town, and it’s enthusiasm. color as one of his the official home of a on the forefront of Iowa with regard to favorites, but it tasted And that education aspect is completely different.” homebrewing club — various trends and movements,” says Jer- one of Anderson’s favorite parts the Society of Brewers ry Anderson when asked why things have about running his store. “You can’t Of course, you don’t ... or SOBs for short. taken off. He’s also seen a rapid increase just go downing every beer you find, need to make beer to in the popularity of homebrewing. “This craft brew scene because you need enjoy beer ... nor does has made everyone “Beer is kind of both a communal and to learn what you your newfound appreciation for a good happy. Customers an individual thing,” he says. “People like. You need to oatmeal stout or a German altbier mean have been intro- tell me, ‘I don’t like beer,’ and maybe know what makes you can’t also relax and crack open a that’s true. But I doubt it. Most of the a beer taste good can of Old Style. “I’m going to quote Tim time, people just haven’t found ‘their’ for you, and then Hayes, a veteran of the business, and say beer. People don’t realize that you can you can learn that my favorite beer is the one that got make beer taste just about any way how to pick us to the dance: Budweiser,” says Fran- you want it to, from the bitterness to them out,” cois. “But I really enjoy Tiger, from Singa- the malt, all of those factors are just he says. pore, and I also really enjoy the Honkers limitless variables. With homebrew- Ale from Goose Island.” ing, you take it a step further, because And just because the lady takes you to duced to a very cosmo- now this truly is your beer, and now the dance, that doesn’t mean you can’t Believe it or not, a surely you can share it. That’s the fun of it.” delicious vanilla cream tango with a few other partners before you go home. ale is fermenting in here. One of the defining aspects of the craft beer scene is its accessibility, much OH, MAN, YOU’RE COMING TO US FOR ADVICE? 25

Dear Trixie: Each Thanksgiving, my parents start nag- ging us for our Christmas lists. It’s not so much that I don’t want neat stuff; it’s just that I feel like I’m being harassed. Every ARIES Better a black eye from a poorly aimed champagne day closer to Christmas it gets even more relentless. What do cork than 100 stitches from a poorly aimed champagne bot- you want? What do you want? It’s too late to mail-order any- tle. You may choose to play it safe this new year’s eve with a thing now, dear. And the thing is, whenever I’d make a list low-key house party featuring 10 different ways to prepare they’d never get me anything I asked for anyway. What should little smokies and cream cheese-based hors d’oeuvres. I do? I’m not ungrateful, I’m sick of the rituals. TAURUS What will you do when you realize your dog got -Forty-two Year Old Son run over by a train the same day your mom got out of prison Dear Son: and your truck broke down? You’re going to go buy tickets to Do your parents provide you with their lists at Thanksgiving? see David Allan Coe, that’s what you’ll do. Perhaps they are merely hinting that they do not wish to re- ceive the Old Spice shaving set or another bottle of that Jean GEMINI It’s not recommended to try emulating Harry Pot- ter’s games of Quidditch in your back yard. Especially if you Nate After Bath Splash. Parents are smart these days. They can have a trampoline. There’s no telling what sorts of pain and tell that you got it at the truck stop as an afterthought. Also, it’s suffering can go down when a broomstick winds up getting never a good idea to wrap presents in aluminum foil. Why not shoved into precisely the wrong place on a crash landing. next year, ask for the things you really want but would never get: cigarettes and real estate. CANCER Beer is wonderful, and it’s a good and honorable - - - thing to honor and respect it and to try to avoid wasting it. However, when the born-on date on your cans of Budweiser Dear Trixie: are a year and a half old ... it’s time to let it go, like Tom I’m a lonely 52 year old woman who really wants to meet Cruise throwing the dog tags in Top Gun. some men. I recently moved to a large apartment complex in the hopes of meeting fun, single people. There is a swimming LEO There’s absolutely nothing wrong with eating sandwich- pool, a game room and tennis courts, but no matter where I es from the gas station, particularly when you’re in a pinch. go nobody pays any attention. How can I get one of those cute Referring to gas station sandwiches as “gourmet,” however, guys in my apartment? is pushing it. That ham’s not exactly fresh. --Freida VIRGO You’ve told yourself in the past that the best diet is Dear Freida: the one you start tomorrow. Great idea, right? With the new Leave the keys in the door. year, take that idea, throw it on its ear and give it a brand - - - new twist. The best diet is the one you start ... next year. Dear Trixie: LIBRA Perhaps the best way to combat the holiday doldrums I have joined a dating service and have my first date next Fri- and the incessant awful family dinners is to emulate some day. I’m not sure what to talk about. I know it’s good to ask hero of cinema, a noble sort who is renowned for his culinary them questions because people like to talk about themselves. skill and sharp wit. Commit your life towards becoming Han- I need some ideas Trixie, otherwise I’ll just keep talking about nibal Lecter. You’ll soon find yourself off the family invites. the weather. Help! --New Woman SCORPIO It’s amazing what you can justify if you find the right excuse. If you’re finding yourself just desperately need- Dear New Woman: ing new direction in your life and to start over again, just burn It’s very good to ask questions! Ask background questions like, down your house. When everyone asks you what on Earth Where were you born? Where did you go to school? Do you you were thinking, tell them that it was “for SCIENCE!” like to torture small domestic animals? Ask thoughtful ques- tions like, “What are your hobbies? Who are your heroes? SAGITTARIUS You need to devise alternative weaponry How many restraining orders do you have against you? Ask to improve your self-defense capabilities. Try rigging up an sexy questions like, Do you French kiss on the first date? Are empty can of soup with a hinge for the lid ... and then make the hinge trigger-operated. Then, fill the can with bees. In- you a boxer or a briefs man? Have you ever done it with your stant bee gun! Just make sure they don’t turn on you. sister? By asking the correct questions you can learn a lot about your potential partner. But just in case, have a buddy CAPRICORN It is indeed baffling that Iowa made it into a bowl outside to write down his license plate number. In case he ... but remember that everybody plays in bowl games nowadays. kills you. So don’t channel your disbelief into a long day at the bar that - - - ends in arrests for you and six others, plus a dozen lawsuits. Dear Trixie: AQUARIUS The perfect get-rich-quick plan has arrived. Be- Can you settle an argument? We are looking to buy a new gin a fast-food chain, and then make it the first fast-food chain vehicle. I want a small Toyota or a 4 door Nissan. My husband to ... wait for it ... serve breakfast all day! You’ll have cars lined wants a huge, hulking Yukon. Or a Chevy Suburban. I don’t up for blocks to get some breakfast delight at four in the after- think it’s right to use so much gas. It’s expensive and keeps noon! Just make sure your food is actually, you know, good. our country dependent on foreign oil. We agreed to do what you recommend. Please settle this argument. Can you tell us PISCES If you’re really bored, why not just go invade a ran- which vehicle to buy? dom foreign country? There are probably at least two dozen --Mrs. Tara Toma that wouldn’t be noticed if they were suddenly to undergo an invasion and a “regime change.” However, don’t get carried Dear Tara Toma: away. Think small, like a country you can take over with a No. spork. A rusty spork. PURGING IS FINE SO LONG AS I GET TO BINGE FIRST. 26

prisingly therapeutic. Warning: if you Urge to Purge try this at home make sure your children and pets are safely tucked inside. With the New Year on the horizon, it makes me think of fresh starts and new Remember: One man’s junk is anoth- beginnings. Not so easy to do when er’s treasure, so before you fill the land- we’re loaded down with baggage. fill with your castaways try to recycle. Some of us may resolve to shed a few I once had a “trunk sale” and invited pounds, eat healthier or spend more all my friends and relatives to rummage time with relatives - yawn; I like to strip through my old clothing before I sent away the layers and purge the contents the leftovers to a second hand shop. of my home. Anything that has me agitated gets thrown out – such as the Got stuff? Restoration Warehouse is a downstairs cordless phone that refuses great resource for those unusual home to charge. It, however, recently broke items. Got a lot of stuff? Kanndo will when I threw it out the back door…I’m come and clean it out for you. Other- feeling much less agitated. Besides, it’s wise, you can haul it out by the carload just stuff and our happiness is not tied and pass it on to Goodwill, St. Vincent to material possessions. Unhealthy at- de Paul, the Mission or the American tachments burden us on our journey, so Cancer Society resale store. start the New Year off right, peel off the Too drained for all of this purging, rear- layers and lighten your load. ranging and restyling? Run straight to Take a look around your home and the beauty parlor and get a new hair- ask yourself, is there anything taking cut. If you’ve had the same style for 10 up space that doesn’t add a positive years then you’re about 5 years overdo aesthetic to the décor? Do you have for a new do. At least something in broken, chipped or faded stuff? If the your home will look refreshed. answer is yes, get rid of it … possible Yes, the New Year fills us with optimism exceptions include but are not limited for the future and leaves us with nostal- to: Your significant other, children and/ gic memories of days gone by. But as or pets ... sorry, you have to keep them. my mother says, you can’t see what’s Everything else is fair game. ahead of you if you’re looking in the Feeling motivated but not sure where rearview mirror; yesterday’s gone…so www.cablecarsquare.com to start? Unless you like failing, have don’tcha look back. self preservation and set realistic goals for yourself. Concentrate on one room or area at a time. Or focus on a single item like all the lamps in your home, or accent pillows; if they look tired and sad or don’t look like they were meant for that spot, rearrange, throw them to the curb or buy new. Are you nursing half-dead house plants? Does the guilt of throwing away a liv- ing thing keep you from giving up? Ac- cept defeat; a dead or dying houseplant is symbolic of death and has no place in a healthy home environment. Does your basement or attic look like a second family inhabits the far recesses of your dwelling? With a “silence of the lambs” basement and huge attic, I am guilty of this, so each summer when the temperature is no less than 90 degrees I like to go up to the third floor and start throwing junk out the window. This is much more efficient than going up and down two flights of stairs and can be sur- ANSWERS TO ALL PUZZLES ARE ON PAGE 31 ... YOU BIG CHEATER! 27

Tom Metcalf: (Re)creating history in oil paint continued from page 9 It seems kind of obvious, but sometimes we We return to our discussion about the role of need to be reminded that painting is an art. painting in documenting history. He tells me Photography can be, but in many ways it is a about the Washburn House in Galena, the completely different thing than painting, cer- historic house of the state senator who was a 365 DOUBLES YOUR SUDOKU FIX! tainly it requires a different set of skills. We friend and advisor of Lincoln and Ulysses S. discuss the effect of the introduction of pho- Grant. Metcalf created six paintings portray- tography on the history of academic painting ing scenes that occurred in the house includ- and how photography took on one role that ing Grant’s election to the presidency. There painting used to serve thereby freeing paint- are no photographs of the historic event. ing to explore other purposes and modes of Metcalf describes how he staged the scene expression. Metcalf notes that in some ways, for the painting using models in period dress, this was the beginning of arranged about the room modernism. holding cigars as if in cel- ebration of the reluctant He goes on to talk about how Grant’s imminent victory. figurative painting is making a comeback. He’s clearly excit- A friend buys us another 365 INSTANT GRATIFICATION Answers on page 31 ed by the pros-pect. Not only round and our conversa- because it is one of his main tion drifts to historical sub- modes of expression, but be- jects, but the Washburn cause it provides a vehicle to House paintings provide illuminate our own history a good example of the and chronicle the people of lengths to which Metcalf our time. Paintings can be- will go to “get it right.” We come part of the “histori-cal finish our wine and head record” of the area he says, back to Dubuque to wrap “It’s important to document things up. the people and the city.” It’s more than just having an im- Later he tells me a bit age to illustrate people, build- more about his portrait of ings and events. Photographs Captain Merry, the man can do that, but as photogra- and his painting that in- phy becomes ubiquitous with spired our story. “Well, I camera phones and smaller, wanted to create an image cheaper, and more powerful that was believable,” he digital cameras, the value of explains, “Something that photography in some way be- looked like it could have comes diluted and paintings been painted from life in slowly, laboriously created the 19th century.” by hand become even more valuable. I think about 100 As it turns out, there is not years from now and what im- much to go on in the his- ages might stand the test of torical record of what the time. A hand-painted por- Captain actually looked trait? Most likely. A cam- like. In an effort to fill in era phone snapshot? Not so the gaps, Metcalf photo- much. graphed a contemporary model in 19th century We visited his old studio space to retrieve clothing and then used Photoshop to move a wood frame for hanging backdrops, but the features around, “adjusting the light and found some other items and paintings. Once values so the anatomy would closely resem- loaded into the minivan, we drove into down- ble that of the original Captain. In essence, I town Galena to have a glass of wine and talk made a better contemporary photo reference some more. It’s not long after we find a place posthumously,” he explains, “It was fun.” The at the bar at Cannova’s and a gorgeous red myth-making continues. “I was explaining wine when Metcalf receives a call on his cell. the process to someone the other day in the He apologizes, saying, “I have to take this.” studio and a light bulb exploded right when I It’s his friend, independent filmmaker Travis had a slip of the tongue and said that the orig- Wilkerson. Wilkerson has been invited back inal Captain didn’t exist,” he relates, further to the Sundance Film Festival in January to blurring the lines between what is and what perform an interactive presentation that will was, “I meant in the form that I had created in incorporate film with live narrative and mu- Photoshop but quickly corrected myself say- sic. He would like Metcalf to complete a ing, ‘No, I meant a good photo like this didn’t large painting that would be onstage during exist...’” History, myth, and reality ... even a the presentation. Oh well, one more thing for myth-maker can get confused sometimes. It’s the “to do” list. okay. Tom Metcalf is a busy guy. J.D. SALINGER MIGHT TRY AND ASSASSINATE BOB GELMS FOR THIS! 28

All of his books are 100 pages too long. would all shut the heck up. He needs editing. He also puts his main 7. I wish the world would re-discover characters through too many scenes where 365 Book Reviews Graham Greene. If he is read at all in Brit they could die and manage miraculous and a number of short stories that he has Lit college courses, you would think the No Resolutions escapes. Two or three of these escapes are held back from publication. Unsubstanti- only thing he wrote was The Heart of the by Robert P. Gelms plenty and too many of them ated rumor has a huge Matter. That’s a great novel but how about are boring and repetitive. I don’t have any New Years Resolutions but volume of material ear- Brighton Rock, The Quiet American, The I do have some New Years Wishes. How marked for publication 4. Mark Danielewski is one of Third Man, or Monsignor Quixote? about a Shelby Cobra, lunch with Thomas after his death. Salinger the most inventive American 8. I wish someone else would jump on the Pynchon, a 1954 Fender Stratocaster, a lives in New Hampshire writers on the scene. His House Flann O’Brien bandwagon. I’m getting kind ride on the Space Shuttle, a house on a and he is 87 years old. of Leaves is a tour de force. In of lonely there all by myself. I know a good beach in the Cayman Islands, a Master of it he plays with the novel as 2. I wish Kurt Vonnegut, way to lose some weight. Read O’Brien’s At Philosophy in Anglo/Irish Literature from an object in addition to some- Jr., would reconsider his Swim-Two-Birds. You will laugh it off. Two Trinity College in Dublin, Ireland, and thing that also houses a story. decision to stop writ- of O’Brien’s biggest fans were James Joyce Meg Ryan covered in dark chocolate. There are stories hidden inside ing fiction. I know he (he said so in print) and the great Irish poet other stories. It is a significant OK, how about I wake up from that very is 84 years old, and he Dylan Thomas who had this to say about At piece of work. His latest nov- pleasant dream and limit my wishes to certainly has earned Swim-Two-Birds: “This is just the book to el, Only Revolutions, picks up the literary kind? the right to do or not give your sister if she’s a loud, dirty, boozy where House of Leaves leaves do whatever he wants. girl.” How can you NOT read it? 1. A new novel, short story, postcard, re- off. There is such a thing as too The man who has given frigerator note, ANYTHING, from J. D. much of a good thing. I hope 9. I wish Oprah Winfrey would apologize us Slaughterhouse Five, Salinger. Salinger is the most famous re- that Danielewski’s next novel to James Frey, the author of A Million Lit- Cat’s Cradle and Sirens of Titan could cluse in the literary world. He published won’t be more experimentation for the tle Pieces. She unjustly sucker-punched have stopped there, securing a perma- The Catcher in the Rye in 1951. It was sake of experimentation. He is an amaz- the guy on national television which was nent place in American letters, but even a hit and has come to be regarded as a ing literary talent, but Laurence Sterne not only pernicious and malodorous on Vonnegut’s bad books are so much better masterpiece of teenage angst. It still sells did a lot of this 250 years ago and, in her part but also, quite possibly, ended than almost all of everyone else’s good about 200,000 copies a year. He gave per- most ways, much more effectively. his career as a writer. She needs to atone books. It is a sad thought that we won’t mission to Orchesis Press to publish the for that kind of abuse. be reading any more of his fiction. 5. I wish Don DeLillo and Nelson De- novella, Hapworth 16, 1924, in 1997 in Mille long life, so they can keep writing 10. Finally, I wish somebody would come book form; it was previously published in 3. I really like the novels of James Rollins. those wonderful books. over to my house and put all my books in the New Yorker magazine in 1965 and is They are pure escapist fun. They remind alphabetical order. the last time J. D. Salinger has appeared in me a little of the Doc Savage series I read 6. I wish somebody would write a book print. It has yet to come out with no expla- with avid interest as a kid or maybe the conclusively proving that Shakespeare If I’m able to sit up and take nourishment nation as to why. There is substantial evi- Dirk Pitt novels of Clive Cussler. I wish really did write all the stuff attributed next New Year’s, I’ll let you know how it dence that he has written at least 2 novels that Rollins’ editor would do him a favor. to him or not. I don’t care; I wish they all turned out.

feeling fine, exactly what was wrong. and my mind became clear, giving me Stranger In a Strange Land Dr. Krish made your visit as comfortable a new perspective on the situation. “No A 365ink series by Nick Klenske as a trip to the doctor’s can be by always problem, no problem,” I would think. remembering the little nuances of each I cringe with tension as I threatening to harm the patient, such as how I reflexively gag I don’t think a doctor can prescribe a anticipate the oncoming doctor’s well-being. Unlike whenever a wooden Popsicle stick is better medication than this. Besides chill…There it is. It snakes its most kids, going to the doctor used to depress my tongue. For me, the taking care of my colds, keeping my way up my spine, causing me was never a problem for me. Popsicle Stick of Torture stayed locked shots up to date, and poking me with to gasp, and sends my heart Instead of being synonymous away in its little glass jar on top of the an endless amount of needles, Dr. Krish racing. There’s no hiding to what a child views as non- desk and my throat was examined with went beyond his basic call of duty. now. My body tattles and he consensual acupuncture, a an old-fashioned “Say ahhh.” Instead of just giving me the treatment I can hear all. “Deep breath,” trip to the doctor was more needed to feel better for a day, he gave the doctor instructs as he along the lines of yoga. What made Dr. Krish an exceptional me a treatment that has allowed me slowly slides his cold metal I’m not saying going to the doctor was the prescription for life to feel better for life. And of course it stethoscope across my heart and towards doctor’s office was all ice cream and he inadvertently gave. This is the wasn’t just me that he prescribed this to, my upper chest. I take in an extended stickers. Remember, I was a kid. All I am prescription of the “Deep Breath.” I have he’s been prescribing “Deep Breaths” breath, pause, and slowly exhale. My saying is that for me, going to the doctor often used this medicine as a mantra to hundreds of patients for over twenty- heart slows. “Deep breath,” the doctor was never a problem because my doctor for handling all of life’s many twists. To five years. Because of him we have repeats, this time with his metallic ear was Dr. Krish. deal with switching schools during the all been able to live a happier, healthier resting on my shoulder blade. Again awkward years of junior high, I used and generally side-effect free life, I take a long breath and instantly feel Dr. Krish was (and still is) one of those a dose of the “Deep Breath.” When something no prescription drug seems relaxed, somehow better. After several rare physicians who knew you not only unceremoniously dumped by a high capable of doing. more meditative breaths, the doctor as a patient, but also as a person. He school girlfriend, only to turn around removes the stethoscope from his ears, was gentle, friendly and, for the most and discover the perfect one, I regained I think of all this as I flip through the places his index finger inquisitively part, honest when he told you, “This will my breath by taking a “Deep Breath.” morning paper and read a statement under his chin and nods with intelligent only hurt a bit.” Dr. Krish was a doctor When sitting for the three-day bar exam, announcing Dr. Krish’s retirement. understanding. I wait patiently for the who developed a familial relationship giving a speech before the freshman Although I’m saddened to think there verdict. “No problem, no problem,” he with his patients. I recall his office class at the University of Iowa, or trying will be no more prescriptions of “Deep ensures me. walls being cluttered with holiday cards, to finagle my way out of a car wreck Breaths”, I guess after so many years of photographs and general greetings from in downtown Dublin while lacking the helping us, it is time for the doctor to This is how I remember going to the his appreciative patients. He knew your proper documentation ... in all of these try a little of his own medicine. Take a doctor as a kid. Noticeably absent name, age, school, hobbies, interests situations I took a long inhale, paused, deep breath, Dr. Krish. You of all people are scenes of kicking, screaming and and, despite your best attempt to fake and slowly exhaled. My body relaxed deserve it. I HOPE THE TASTE OF ILLINOIS RESEMBLES LITTLE SMOKIES 29

year, more than 300 business members from the two Chambers took part in the GALENA SHORTS • GALENA SHORTS • GALENA SHORTS first event ... and even more are expect- ed this year. Jimmy Buffet Weekend Jan 6 (9 p.m. - 1 a.m.) Island-themed party with Carib- bean food and tropical drink specials. Prize giveaways including a pair of skis The cost is only $75 per 6-foot table and bindings. Sat: Live entertainment by Pirates Over 40, a Jimmy Buffet cover booth space (provided with skirting band. Chestnut Mountain Resort, 8700 W. Chesnut Rd., Galena. 800-397-1320. & cloth), and additional skirted tables are available for $75 per table. (Bonus All About A Ghost Tour Jan 6, 13, 20, 27 (8 p.m.) time: If you are renting a booth at the A fascinating tour through the DeSoto House Hotel with stories about Galena’s Galena Chamber-sponsored Galena Showcase in March, the cost is $60. ghostly past and present. A mix of history and mystery. Call for more informa- You must be registered for the Show- tion. $9. DeSoto House Hotel, 230 S. Main St., Galena. 815-777-9252. case in order to get the reduced price.) Beads, Wine and Chocolate Jan 5, 19 (3-5 p.m.) And there’s no fee for restaurants, gro- cery stores, or beverage distributors Create a single strand bracelet or necklace while indulging with a glass of wine providing substantial food or bever- and scrumptious chocolates. Reservations are required. Please call for special Mmmm, tasty! ages, with a maximum of 2 tables per group scheduling. $20 plus materials. Galena Bead Bar, 109 N. Main St., Ga- exhibitor. All participants are encour- lena. 815-777-4080. Illinois Chamber Members Business aged to have a door prize and registra- P.M., co-sponsored by the Dubuque and tion at their booth. Booths are available Galena Chambers of Commerce, will be now so get your application in early to Holiday Art Show: Antarctica, Wildlife in the Southern Oceans Jan 5-7, 12-14, hosting A Taste of Illinois III and Not Just secure your reservation. Your returned 19-21, 26-28 (10 a.m. - 5:30 p.m.) Featuring beautiful wild life photography the Food on Tuesday, January 16, from application and payment must be re- by local well-known photographer, Barbara Baird. Free. Stone House Pottery & 5-7 p.m. at the Silver Eagle Event Center ceived no later than December 31 to Gallery, 418 Spring St, Galena. 815-777-0354. over across the bridge in East Dubuque. guarantee your booth reservation — so do it! Do it now! Checks can be made Back by popular demand, this is the out to the Dubuque Area Chamber of third annual Illinois Business P.M. Last Commerce. I DIDN’T SEE RENT, BUT MY GIRLFRIEND LOVED IT! 30

C’mon, Rent-heads So, about ten years ago, there was this little musical called Rent, kind of a mod- ern-day retelling of La Boheme. It made an eensy-weensy little splash ... won a Tony award ... was made into a movie by Chris Columbus earlier this year ... so I guess it’s kind of a big deal. One of the stars of both the original cast and the film, Adam Pascal (Roger Davis), is hitting the University of Wisconsin-Plat- He’s released two albums thus far, Mod- teville’s Center for the Arts on January el Prisoner in 2000 and Civilian in 2004, 26 at 8 p.m. and he’s also appeared in the films SLC Pascal, who entered showbiz with a Punk!, School of Rock and Tempta- couple of bands he put together with tion, a musical, before appearing in the schoolmates, was eventually drawn film adaptation of Rent. He’s currently into the world of musical theatre when touring with Larry Edoff while making he auditioned for the role of Roger in preparations to produce a third solo al- Rent and, well, the rest is history. He bum, and he’s also filming the movie picked up a Tony nomination, a Theater Goyband. World award and an Obie award, ce- Tickets for an evening with Adam Pas- menting him as one of the rising stars cal are $18, and $12 for UW-P students in the industry. He was then cast in the holding current IDs. Tickets are avail- Elton John / Tim Rice musical Aida as able at the University of Wisconsin- Radames, and then joined the cast of Platteville’s box office, or by calling the Kander and Ebb’s Cabaret as the Emcee. box office at 608-342-1298. For more Not wanting to be typecast as a Broad- information and audio/video samples of way singer, Pascal then branched into Adam Pascal’s work, check out the Web solo recordings. site at www.uwplatt.edu.

This Job and Shove It”, rolls back Auction time, baby! throught the midwest on January 27th. The guy who draws bikers, cowboys, If you’ve been a good shopper this year hippies and teenagers (as he says in his and you’ve been collecting your Santa song “Longhaired Redneck”) has been Bucks by shopping with Santa Bucks- doing the music thing since he released participating sellers, get ready for the his very first album, Penitentiary Blues, time to actually use them! It’s the Plat- clock from Something in 1968, and he’s been touring regu- teville Chamber of Commerce’s Santa Different, a Fuji digital camera from larly, currently making the rounds with Bucks Auction on Saturday, January Wal-Mart, an Oreck vacuum from Wey- his longtime guitarist Joe Finn as well 6, at 11 a.m. at the Platteville Golf & gant’s Appliance, a Smokey Joe Grill as his son. Country Club. Santa Bucks are the only from Heiser’s and much, much more, His most recent album, Rebel Meets currency accepted at the auction. including overnight stays, gift baskets, Rebel, was a collaboration between gift certificates, jewelry, artwork, movie Coe himself and rockers Dimebag Dar- This year’s grand prize is a 32” Sylvania tickets, video rentals, back rubs from rell and Vinnie Paul of Pantera & Dam- LCD HDTV from Radio Shack in Platte- 365’s Ralph Kluseman.... ageplan. Following Dimebag Darrell’s ville, valued at over $1000. (That’s a heck “I was drunk the day my 2004 murder, the album was finished of a TV. Can we have it?) Other prizes For more information, contact the mom got out of prison...” by the remaining musicians and re- include 5 drawer wooden chests from chamber office at 608-348-8888 or by leased this past May. Ashley Furniture HomeStore, 14K gold e-mailing [email protected]. It’s hard to go through a night at many earrings from Helkers Jewelry, a Bulova bars in Dubuque without hearing it at Like Keith Richards, Al Davis and Bryce’s least once. It’s a song we closely as- dad, David Allan Coe, it seems, can not sociate with a evening of cajun food be killed by conventional weapons. and shooting hoops at Fat Tuesday’s. It’s Now with 26 albums to his credit, Coe practically an anthem for the everyman brings his show to Roosters in down- in all of us. “You Never Even Call Me town Platteville, Wisconsin. Note that, By My Name” is David Allan Coe’s sig- on occasion, Coe’s shows can get a lit- nature song, and to a great degree, his tle rough around the edges so keep that least controversial. in mind when you get your tickets. This Yep, believe it or not ... he’s still rock- is gritty rockin’ country at it roots. ing. And he’ll be doing it in Platteville. Tickets for the January 27 show are $20 David Allan Coe, legendary for such in advance, $25 at the door, and are classics other classics as “The Ride,” available now at Roosters, Bricktown or “Willie, Waylon, and Me” and “Take at ETIX.com. MY NIGHT ... SCANDALOUS? PERHAPS ... BUT FUN! 31

Puzzle Answers from page 27 The Top 10 Double Top-Secret 365’s Favorite Places For Ten Things We Believe Secrets about the 365 Staff A Great Burger Cryptoquip Answer Will Still Be Around In 2087 10. Tim’s DVD collection includes such clas- 10. Anton’s or New Diggins Inn, two great sics as Beavis & Butt-head Do America, The 10. Spam. (Seriously, it’s unnatural. It will places for a burger right across the street Godfather, Citizen Kane and American Pie. never leave us.) from each other. Biker friendly! 9. Wal-Mart. (We are the Borg. You will be 9. Bryce lists “867-5309” as the song he 9. Hudson’s Classic Grill (Burgers, shakes never, ever wants to play again. assimilated.) Sudoku Answers and rock ‘n’ roll, baby.) Puzzle 1 Puzzle 2 8. The Mississippi Band. (Seriously, how 8. Jim Heckmann is not as scary as he 8. The Point...pretzel bun! seems. He’s worse. long have they been around?) 7. Ellen Goodmann has an unnatural fear 7. Mike’s stool at Isabella’s. 7. Beefstro (in the Holiday Inn) You really have to try it. of owls. Ya rly. 6. The Ponderosa building. 6. Mike has never seen any of the Die Hard 5. Re-runs of Law & Order on TNT. 6. The Dubuque Mining Company. The movies. Cave-In doesn’t hurt the voting either. 4. Mountains upon mountains of worthless 5. Tanya regularly jumps out of perfectly AOL disks, offering you umpteen billion 5. Culver’s. Too good for fast food. good airplanes ... for FUN! free hours in exchange for selling your soul 4. Red Robin (They have one with a fried 4. Tim does not like Chinese (the food, he’s to them. egg on top. Seriously.) fine with the people). 365 Instant Gratification 3. Bats that seem to pop out of your closet 3. Paul’s Big Game Tap. Greasy burgers Crossword Answers From page 27 3. Mike didn’t always have rock-star hair. at the worst possible time. are best if the timing is right and the atmo- Once, it was downright short. sphere ... positively gamey! 2. Stacks upon stacks of TPS reports. What- 2. Bryce has never eaten a Hot Pocket, and ever happened to the paper-less society the 2. Houlihan’s. Great burger and great insists that he never will. Internet was supposed to bring us? service time after time. 1. Ralph once had hair. On his head. We 1. Keith Richards and Al Davis (And Ma- 1. Lot 1 (Our favorite Tuesday night meet- saw pictures. rine Bob Parks, too.) up spot. We think Tim might have a stool with his name on it.) 365 presents My Night Here at 365, we like to go out and photo will win a prize! from have a good time. We also know that the dungeons of 365’s world you enjoy it, too — we’ve got thou- headquarters ... so there’s sands upon thousands of pictures in no guarantee of what the our Dubuque365.com photo galleries prizes will be. They might to prove it! And now, we’re giving you, be gift certificates or tickets 1. The first celebration ball was dropped in Times our lovely readers of the Tri-States, the to an area concert ... or they Square in 1907. (The year before the Cubs’ most opportunity to enjoy your nights on might be the week-old sand- recent World Series victory.) the town just a little bit more. wich that someone left in the 2. Auld Lang Syne translates to “times gone by.” fridge. (We’ll try to avoid that, So, this year, you can actually understand a little It’s called “My Night,” and it’s exactly We want your very best pictures of your though.) The standard rules apply, of bit of what you’re singing. what the name suggests. When you go course: You’ll need to submit your con- very best times on Main Street during 3. Taking better care of animals is not one of the out to catch a concert at the Busted Lift the coming days, weeks, months and tact information along with your photo most common resolutions. Using them as target or at Isabella’s, or when you decide to year. We want the pictures that show in order to actually win, and there are practice is. go paint the town red on Lower Main you and your friends having the times limits to what we can publish! (So, in Street, or to bellow out your favorite other words, no nudity or anything il- 4. The Chinese New Year is celebrated on the of your lives. We want the pictures that second new moon after the winter solstice. Dionne Warwick tune during a slam- show everybody what a great place legal. Unless you’re Corey Feldman.) ming karaoke session (half our reader- Dubuque is and just how much fun 5. People put Christmas trees up in bonfires. Fes- tivus poles are made out of aluminum, silly! ship just asked, “Who’s Dionne War- you can have here. Now, that doesn’t wick?”), or to enjoy a glass of wine at mean we just want pictures of you 6. They must breed them weird out west, because Se- Jamie’s new location in the 1000 block and your friends blitzed out in East attle uses an elevator for its New Year’s countdown. of Main, we want to know about it. Dubuque (although, those are indeed More than that, we want to see it, and 7. Though he’s been alive since 1492, Dick Clark great photos). When you encounter began hosting his Rockin’ New Year’s Eve in we want to share it with the world! someone dressed in a cow costume in 1972. He’s only missed it twice. (The world of the Tri-States, anyway.) the middle of January, we want to see 8. It was called Freedom’s Eve because January it. When your friend is sprung with 1, 1863, was the effective date of the Emancipa- a surprise engagement, we want to tion Proclamation. see it! Funny, sweet, random, odd, unique ... we want to see it all. Just e-mail the pictures of your night, 9. The Tournament of Roses (the Rose Bowl) is and your contact information, to the most popular New Year’s Day parade in the Every issue, we’re going to take the best [email protected]. And get United States. Go USC! picture from all our submissions, and out there and have some fun! (And 10. Every party in the Tri-States will be rocking we’re going to publish it in this very drink a few Buds for us, since we’re the new year in with style. Designate a driver. space. The submitter of that winning busy just putting this paper together.)