Staying true to our core values is the best way to deal with conflict

The ability to resolve conflict by forgiving others provides the capacity for individuals to escape from the damaging consequences. Being thrust into conflict can change individual priorities, testing people as they adapt to the inescapable conflict and their hidden strengths are revealed. These innocent victims, who are forced to endure the terror and anguish inflicted upon them, often need to forgive themselves and those responsible for the conflict in order to develop from their experiences, and this is done best when one remains true to their core values. Some victims are able to remain faithful to their beliefs, assisting them to find an extraordinary inner-strength to survive which courageously inspires hope and purpose within their fellow sufferers, helping them escape from the conflict they are consumed in. Developing the capacity to move on from horrific experiences by abiding to their inner values is what truly matters when dealing with conflict.

Conflict in war is inescapable as the priorities of powerful people can be inflicted upon an entire nation, however the victims of conflict can handle it in a positive way by not deterring from their beliefs which influences others to survive the conflict as well. In Paradise Road, Margaret Drummond said “the will to survive is strong, stronger than anything.” The experiences of the women in the prisoner of war (POW) camp in Japan is observed in Paradise Road and Drummond’s quote describes the women’s strong will to survive until the end of the war. Margaret Drummond was based on Margaret Dryburgh. Dryburgh remained true to her convictions and beliefs until her death in the Palembang prison camp in 1945, and instead of a sign of defeat, her death empowered the other women to fight and remain strong until the end of the war. Although the conflict experienced by the women is inevitable, Dryburgh's aid in the initiative to create a vocal orchestra provides a focal point for the group when they needed spiritual comfort and optimism. Despite Dryburgh “trying” to hate the Japanese who imprisoned her, Dryburgh's will to remain true to her Christianity restricts her ability to “bring [herself] to hate people. The worse they behave, the sorrier [she] feels for them”. This capacity to forgive those who have inflicted pain and suffering upon her gave Dryburgh power over her captors that helped her remain true to her positive spirit and strengthen her ability to survive. Margaret Dryburgh’s experience as a POW shows that although conflict is unavoidable, being able to forgive others, rather than express hatred, can resolve conflict and enhance the chance of survival.

The ineludible reasons for conflict cannot always be forgiven, and unlike Dryburgh, some may hold onto a sense of guilt that imprisons them due to being unable to forgive others, as they are unable to find the strength to stay true to their convictions. This can be appreciated in Primo Levi, an Italian Jew, who survived Auschwitz and was unable to find a way to forgive his captors for the conflict they put him through. Levi’s novels, If This is a Man and The Drowned and the Saved explore his experiences in the camp, and expresses his belief that “the worst survived, that is, the fittest; the best all died”, showing his guilt for surviving. Levi remains haunted by his experiences and was unable to escape the wider conflict he is involved in as he battles the fight as a victim against his oppressors. Levi loses hope in humanity as the conflict around him allows him to realise that “perfect happiness is unrealisable”, however it is the “power to refuse [their] consent” to death that is the “strength” that helps one survive. His battle of conscience and his troubled experiences lead to Levi’s suspected suicide in 1987, demonstrating the life-long effects conflict can have on the victims who are unable to find strength to be loyal to their core values by forgiving themselves or their captors. Levi was unable to escape from the conflict, and although his ability to “adapt to everything” allowed him to survive, his inability to cope with hatred and remorse was drawn from his inability to deal with conflict as he uses death as an "escape".

Although Primo Levi found it difficult to forgive his enemies and those who forced him into conflict, others who survived the inevitable conflict in the Holocaust were unable to find peace and it is only after one is honest with oneself and confronts their past that they are able to resolve their inner conflict. Like Primo Levi, Eva and Miriam Mozes were sent to the Auschwitz concentration camp

and became the subject of medical experiments of unimaginable horror, performed by the notorious “Angel of Death”, Dr. Josef Mengele. On the first day in captivity, the sisters were confronted with “scattered naked corpses” and horrendous living conditions; Eva concluding that “if there was a hell on earth, this must be it” as she realised they “were all alone in this place where there was nowhere to turn for help.” After being “injected three times a week with all kinds of germs and drugs and chemicals”, Eva made a silent pledge that she would “do anything in [her] power to not end up like them on the latrine floor”, allowing “no room for any thought except survival”. Despite being surrounded by death and loathing during captivity, Eva and Miriam’s resilience and strength proved the foundation of their shared survival that allowed them to escape from the horrific experiments. Although Eva was now free from her captors, she was unable to forgive their repugnant behaviour, with her experiences holding her captive in a further prison of bitterness and grief. It wasn’t until Eva returned to Auschwitz 50 years later, that she made a pledge to “forgive everybody because of the fact that I had the power to forgive. It gave me an emotional freedom...[as] all the pain I was carrying...were lifted from me...I was no longer a prisoner from my tragic past.” It is important for Eva to forgive those who wronged her in the past by employing her core values once again so she is able to share the response of Dryburgh that in order to resolve conflict, one must always “forgive people who have wronged them” to be “free”.

Ronald Reagan wrote that “Peace is not absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means” and when doing so, the perpetrators of conflict can be forgiven. It is often an ability to forgive those who inflicted the pain by staying true to inherent values that allows individuals to develop these latent characteristics, however not everyone is able to find this strength within themselves to forgive the experiences of their past. Not being able to forgive others for the inescapable conflict experienced impacts on lives and is consuming, until it seems one is able to learn the ability to forgive and resolve the conflict, and this is the best way to deal with conflict.