S, Pawsox and the Main Event,Altfacts,News Analysis
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Phillipe and Jorge’s Cool, Cool World RIP, Yelberton Abraham For New England football fans of a certain age, the passing of Y.A. Tittle brought back a ton of good memories. Tittle was the famed quarterback of the New York Giants in the early 1960s. He was the NFL MVP in 1963 and held records for most TD passes and yardage back when Tom Brady was a not even a glint in his old man’s teenage eye. Long before the New England Patriots were formed, this good ol’ boy from LSU (“Went in dumb, come out dumb, too” thank you Randy Newman, but not in Y.A.’s case) was lighting it up in the pros. Those were the days when the Giants ruled the region, with New York City residents coming up to Connecticut to rent motel rooms on Sundays to watch Tittle, Sam Huff, Frank Gifford, Del Shofner and the gang play on Channel 3 from Hartford because the home games were blacked out in the Big Apple. While Jorge was a Giants fan, even though Phillipe was a supporter of the Giants’ archenemies, the Philadelphia Eagles, he had ultimate respect for Tittle. Y.A. was one of the best of a generation of QBs who weren’t athletic freaks, but simply knew how to play football and win games, like his hardass peers Bobby Layne and Norm Van Brocklin, who also wouldn’t surprise you if they cracked a beer in the locker room at halftime. The iconic photo of Tittle shows him after getting sacked and throwing an interception against Pittsburgh in his final year, blood streaming down his head and looking like a lost soul. But he was a big man in a sport that he helped make America’s favorite. Say hi to Chuck Bednarik when you hit the pearly gates, Y.A.; we’re sure you’ve got some good stories to swap. Everyone’s Guilty Hollywood’s ranking fat pig Harvey Weinstein finally got what was coming to him, and it would be true justice if he spent time behind bars for his molestation and rape of actresses whose careers he could kill if they didn’t acquiesce to his depraved come-ons. Join the crowd with other recently exposed swine like Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly. If anyone thinks Weinstein’s behavior was not known throughout the gossip-ridden film industry for years before he was publicly accused, you still think Tinkerbell exists in real life. Yet the only male actor or executive P&J have seen mentioned as having confronted him was Brad Pitt, and even that was done behind the scenes, because Weinstein had the power to torpedo his career as quickly as he could any young actress. It’s defies belief to think that the community that made “casting couch” an expression could be clueless about carrying on a heinous tradition of exploiting young women that reeks of sex slave traders. Instead of a parade of women who are now coming out about Weinstein’s vile abuse, which can’t be easy for any of them, where are the male actors, directors and producers who have known about this for decades, and who have tacitly condoned this criminal behavior? Oh, they must still be in makeup. You gutless wimps. “Don” Rhymes with “Moron” Could there be anything more fun than having incompetent Secretary of State Rex Tillerson outed for having called his equally clueless and embarrassing President Big Baby a moron after a Pentagon meeting? Okay, it is stating the obvious, but kudos to the high level officials who leaked it to the press. But in the fantasy kingdom of Trumpworld, The Donald immediately labeled the NBC report “fake news,” which is getting real old, real fast when used any time someone points out what a head case and insecure child we have elected as our commander-in-chief. And naturally, the Orange Orangutan showed his lack of knowledge about how TV news stations are licensed by the Federal Communications Commission, which is on an individual basis, not by network, when he suggested having the FCC try to take away NBC’s license as a whole. Oops. Now there is real fake news, pardon the oxymoron. So another week goes by with President Pussy-grabber offending Puerto Ricans in direct contrast to what his chief of staff John Kelly has said and ignoring the disastrous damage wreaked on the island by Hurricane Maria, trying to obliterate Obamacare by a backdoor route using an administrative order, and trying to suppress the freedom of the press. All through the use of tweets, of course, the highest level of informed and intelligent communication our leader can handle. As long as once reputable people like Tillerson and Kelly continue to suck up to their boss despite his contradicting them and humiliating them in public, The Donald will continue to enjoy a bit of credibility, as people ignore the obvious lack of self control and questionable mental stability. It has become tiring and sad, both for the country and the people in it who care so much about what America has meant on the world stage. Answer Us “Why?” As always, after a mass shooting like the one in Las Vegas, Phillipe and Jorge have a simple question: Why are people allowed to buy assault rifles? The answer given is that outlawing them would be the first step toward outlawing all guns. This has as much credence as saying that stopping people from driving 100 miles an hour is the precursor to taking away everyone’s car. The capitulation of politicians to the National Rifle Association is one of the great insults to caring Americans, and along with our president, lessens us in the eyes of everyone. Oh, and please explain it to the families of the victims. Thanks. More Passages Your superior correspondents would like to mention two other recent passings of note (both friends of ours from the Vo Dilun music scene). Veteran DJ Jimmy Gray (probably best known for his long tenure as WPRO-FM’s morning drive personality) passed away at the age of 73. He was a great guy, much loved in the RI radio community and a longtime friend of Jorge’s. Less well-known (he was a club performer way back in the ’60s and ’70s) was Hank Turgeon, who passed away at the age of 80. Hank had one of the earliest and best Elvis tribute/impersonator acts in this area. Hank also owned a cab company in RI for a number of years and Jorge would often ride in his cab just to chat with him. Rest in peace, Jimmy and Hank. Dr. Oldie The Original Southern New England Rock ‘n’ Roll Collectors Convention will take place on Sunday, November 5 at the Ramada Hotel Seekonk, 213 Taunton Ave. (on Rte. 44, next to Tasca Ford). Record collectors and casual rock fans can check out 50 tables of vinyl records, CDs and other rock ‘n’ roll memorabilia on display by dealers from all over New England. In addition to rarities, you’ll find literally thousands of LPs and 45s at cheap prices. At nearly 40 years old, this is the area’s oldest running show. Doors open at 10am and close at 3pm. Early Admission ticketholders can get in at 8:30am to get first crack at the merchandise. AltFacts: The Terror of Sinclair Now that the media-content-franchising, frighteningly biased conglomerate Sinclair Broadcast Group has purchased local WJAR News Channel 10, you can expect Terrorism Watch and other trumped-up segments (like one starring Boris Epshteyn) to invade the minds of those watching local news broadcasts. Our intrepid AltFacts investigators (who don’t, technically, exist – but neither do unbiased Sinclair investigators), went deep undercover to reveal what other mind-invading media tricks they have up their sleeves. Possible collaboration with the new 94.5 (WChristianRockFromHellWhereBRUsedToBe) has not been ruled out. Plans to recruit landmarks like the Big Blue Bug and Independent Man appear to have been unsuccessful so far, although we have it on good authority that the Johnston Landfill is fully on board. In fact, mutant garbage that’s spawning in that esteemed environment has recently gained the power of speech and will have a segment on Channel 10 beginning next week. And in a public relations move like no other, Sinclair is offering to reward any mayors, pundits or higher elected officials (not high in a cannabinoid sense … well, maybe that too … although these folks go more for the coke end of the spectrum), if those officials agree to read prewritten, Sinclair-supplied content. By reading brief, pointed statements at the beginning and end of every press conference (and let’s face it, who’s really listening anyway?) officials can secure financing to ensure reelection and earn exciting bonus prizes from those not claimed on any given day’s screening of “The Price Is Right!” On the bright side, it is entirely possible that this arrangement will allow the governor (henceforth to be called the conservanor when speaking ex cathedra) to solve RI’s debt problems with one swift, outside- the-box moral compromise, which would make her the most effective moral compromiser in RI’s robust history of moral compromisation. How’s that for playing a trump card? Phillipe & Jorge’s Cool, Cool World: Sinclair Media, Delays and Secession Bend Over, JARheads WJAR-TV, Channel 10, the local NBC station, was publicly shamed and disgraced — and rightly so — by The Urinal’s recent excellent front pager by Jacqueline Tempera that pointed out that the JARhead’s Big Daddy, Sinclair Broadcast Group, was forcing them to air pre-packaged promo pieces for President Trump and his policies (read: unhinged, constantly changing rantings).