July 11, 1995 Dear Lovers, We Are Proud, Finally, to Provide to United Methodist Encounter This Electronic Library Containing A
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Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations Contents July 11, 1995 Dear Lovers, We are proud, finally, to provide to United Methodist Encounter this electronic library containing a substantial library of excellent flame presentation material. Flames should feel free to use this information, print it and copy it as desired for Marriage Encounter Flame use and other Encounter use. This library should be considered a living, growing entity. But it will only grow as new material is provided. Please submit materials, especially Flame Presentations or presentation outlines which have been a part of your Flame activities so that other Flames can be encouraged and strengthened. This library will be updated and redistributed whenever there is sufficient new material to warrant it. In the very new future, similar libraries will be generated for Love Circles and for Dialog Workshops. If you have any resource materials which would benefit these libraries, please send them to us for the benefit of MEUM couples and Flames everywhere. This disk was generated in Word for Windows but it is formatted as RTF (Rich Text Format) meaning it is Text format including document format information. It should be readable by most of the popular modern personal word processing software. If you have any trouble accessing this library in a readable form and need a different format, please call us. Please use this library for the benefit of couples and Flames. We have put a great deal of time into compiling this resource and need only its use to make it a Joy. Steve and Rita Sowers National Resource Couple Encounter, United Methodist 305 Sunblest Blvd. South Fishers, IN. 46038 (317) 842-0924 (Reformatted and updated by Gary & Lisa Morris, November 2014) Page i Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations Contents CONTENTS Page Title 1. Introduction to Flame 2. How to Host an Information Night 3. Flames 10. Reliving the Weekend Dialogue Questions 13. Will You Do It? 15. A Cornerstone to Relationship - Self 17. Encounter with Self 18. Keeping Each Other Number One 19. Trust 20. Our Vocation, to Love One Another 21. Experiencing Daily Awareness of Us 22. Living Our Coupleness 24. To See Ourselves More Clearly (compliments) 25. Did You Know Your Attitude is Showing? 27. Pride and Humility 28. Priorities: Yours, Mine and Ours 30. How Other Marriages Influence Ours 31. Signs of Love 32. Openness to Receiving 34. Unity - Marriage in God's Plan 36. Leisure 38. Seeing Our Goodness 39. A Key to Living Dialogue 40. The Secret of Staying in Love 41. Confidence In Our Dialogue 43. The Art and Joy of Listening 44. Listening 46. Romance is Not a Cure-All 48. Our Sexual Relationship and Me 50. Sex as a Tool for Communication 51. Communicating Sexuality in our Home 53. Forgiveness and Reconciliation 54. Forgiveness – What Is It? 55. The Lost Son: Forgiveness & Reconciliation 56. Trust - The Key to Married Life 57. Gift of Healing 58. Sacrifice 59. How Come We Don't Talk About Death? 61. Our Coupleness - Our Gift to the Church 62. Treating God Like I Treat You. 64. Wherever You Go, I Will Go 65. The Competitive Christian 67. Follow Me 69. Warm Fuzzys Page ii Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations Contents 73. Remember When 74. 365 Times 75. Please Hear What I'm Not Saying 77. Open House 78. Renewing Our Dreams Through Change 79. Open and Caring 80. Love Letter 81. Marriage in God's Plan Through Coupleness 82. Change Thru Love 83. We Are Special 84. Let's Stop Playing Games 88. Sharing Our Feelings About Possessions 89. Finances 91. Being Honest With Our Feelings 92. Focus on Feelings 93. Let's Celebrate 94. Hooked on Feelings 96. I'm OK, You're OK 97. Recruiting is a Way of Life 99. Approaching Meaningful Dialogue 101. How The Dialogue Process Helps Us Live Out Our Daily Lives 103. Toward A Deeper Relationship 104. How to Describe a Feeling 107. Living Out Our Love 110. Discovering Feelings and Needs in Dialogue 112. Experiencing Our Confidence in Dialogue 113. Memories 114. Aldonza 115. Dealing With Death as a Couple 117. To Love is A Decision 118. To Love is A Decision - by Fr. Chuck Gallagher 122. If God Should Speak 125. Apples 126. The Rose 128. Why Don’t You Grow Up! 129. Christ is Risen For Us Today! An Easter Presentation 131. A Child Is Born For Us Today, Alleluia! An Advent Presentation 132. But We Haven't Missed Love! 134. Close Encounters of the Kid Kind 138. I Corinthians 13 for Couples 140. Our Sex - Routine or Refreshing 142. Our Children's Self Image - How Do We Affect It? 144. Couple Dynamics -- Toleration or Change 145. Community Night Outline- Dialogue Workshop 150. Mission, Vision, Values Page iii Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations Contents 152. Forms of Behavior in Regards to Financial Responsibility 153. Do You Love Me? 154. Hints For Those Who Are Running After Self-Worth 155. Feelings, The Vital Signs of our Relationship 156. Romance, Adventure, Daring Rescues, Undercover Work 160. Toward a Deeper Relationship 162. Scripture Dialogue 166. Family Dialogue 170. Dialogue Series on Sex 171. Dialogue Series on Death 172. Priorities of Marriage 175. The Birds in our Lives 180. A Weekend of Music 182. Dealing with Differences 186. Our God is an Awesome God 192. Unconditional Love 197. Respect 202. Be Kind to One Another 203. A Marriage Prayer 204. Respectfully Disagreeing 205. Balancing Goals 208. Spirituality in Our Marriage Means Cherishing Each Other 210. A Different Kind of Bird 214. Risks 215. Anniversary Song, a Poem 216. Encounter, a Poem Page iv Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations INTRODUCTION TO FLAME We encourage the use of this presentation when Rookie couples are present or when discipline has become a matter of concern. 1. We'd like to take a few minutes to recall what a Flame is. It is a place and a time for us to strengthen and share our commitment to each other through the daily use of 10/10. The word Flame is to remind us that we want to keep the flame of our marriage alive and healthy. 2. A Flame takes as it's topic a part of one of the talks from the weekend. Meeting on a monthly basis, we progress through the topics in the same order that they are presented on the weekend. So, each year we are able to review, in part, an entire weekend. The format of a Flame is: a. Opening Prayer b. The Presentation c. The 10/10 question and dialogue. d. Open Sharing - The sharing may be either a sharing from the private dialogue or a separate sharing question. e. A brief business meeting, including determining the next host and presentation couples. f. Prayer and Sing-Off g. Time for socializing. 3. We'd like to say a few words also about the discipline of sharing. When we share, we share who we are as an individual and as part of a marriage relationship. Specifically, we share our attitudes and our feelings that were stimulated by the sharing question and by the presentation. We ask that you please write the sharing question in your notebooks as it is given. Refer to the question before you share. It is important to remember that we do not share attitudes and feelings about our spouse unless we have already shared those specific attitudes and feelings with our spouse. What we do share is our attitudes and feelings about our self and those attitudes and feelings about our spouse which we have already shared with our spouse. What we are doing, then, is sharing from our relationship, our attitudes and feelings about the question. Sharing is not a discussion and is not meant to solicit a response or initiate a debate. We do not share to get a point across. We share to share that part of ourselves that makes us unique. My sharing might stimulate feelings or attitudes in you which you wish to share. That's OK because that's not a response that I solicited from you. All sharing of this group, and of any Marriage Encounter Group, are confidential within the group. Page 1 of 216 Post Encounter Resources - Flame Presentations HOW TO HOST AN INFORMATION NIGHT An Information Night is a meeting hosted by encountered couples for unencountered couples to encourage them to make a Marriage Encounter Weekend. Every couple is encouraged to invite other couples to an information meeting. There are several ways to do this. You may be able to invite your couples to a meeting that is already scheduled by community or you may host your own. First the time and place must be determined. It can be in your home or in the church. It might even be held in a Sunday School class. Couples are invited with written or verbal invitations. The format for the meeting can follow several plans. 1. A skit presented by three couples can be used. The skit is read and contains humor. It shares most of the information that couples need to know about Marriage Encounter weekends. After the skit a little more information is shared with time for questions. 2. There are videos available that also share the information about the weekend. The video can be shown and followed by a time for questions. After the information is shared, light refreshments are usually served. Registration blanks are handed out and couples are encouraged to decide of a date and complete. Copies of the skit and the video are available. Contact a presenting couple for these materials.