Contents Vol. 27, No. 8

The Hindu Faith — 3 4

Om Vidya-avidya Svarupinyai Namah 8 Swami Amritageetananda Puri

Vow of Silence 15 Padma (Corinne Laveissière), France

Omkara Divya Porule 22 Swami Tureeyamritananda Puri

Anointed with Love 24 Sharadamani, India

Her Unseen Feet 29 Vickram, India

Some articles use the masculine pronoun when referring to God, in keeping with convention and to avoid the clumsiness of constructions such as ‘He or She’ or ‘Him or Her.’

Printed and Published by Swami Jnanamritananda Puri on behalf of M.A. Mission Trust, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam, Kerala 690 546, India. Printed at Amrita Offset Printers, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam, Kerala 690 546, India. Published at M.A. Math, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam, Kerala 690 546, India. Phone: (0476) 289 6278/7578/6399. Matruvani Office Phone: 08589003341 | Editor: Br. Brahmamrita Chaitanya Subscription (Indian): 1 year: `50 | 3 years: `125 | 5 years: `200 | 15 years: `500 Subscription (overseas): 1 year: US$15 | Life (15 years): US$150 Letters and Submissions: [email protected] March 2016 3 AMMA’S MESSAGE

The Hindu Faith—3

he principles of Sanatana Dharma are the imperishable Twealth the selfless rishis1 compassionately bequeathed the whole world. Just as air and water are necessary for survival, these principles are vital for every seeker of peace. Sanatana Dharma does not ask anyone to believe in a God seated in the sky. “Believe in yourself. Everything is in you” — this is what it teaches. The power of an atom bomb, which can destroy the whole globe, lies in the tiny atom. A sprawling banyan tree sprouts from a small seed. Likewise, divine consciousness inheres in every one of us. We can understand this through logic or experience it through sad- hana (spiritual practices). It is enough if we sincerely and faithfully follow the path to awakening this power. Sanatana Dharma teaches shraddha, bhakti and vish- was — alertness, devotion and faith . It does not ask us to believe anything blindly. Before one operates an appliance, one must first know how to operate it. If not, we might damage the appliance. Jnana is correct knowledge of how to work. Shraddha is being armed with that knowledge and working with awareness. A man pours water into a tank.

1 Seers to whom mantras were revealed in deep meditation.

4 Matruvani

He continues doing so the in life is to take us closer to whole day until evening, but the God. We must act without self- tank does not get filled. Failing interest and without the sense to realize the fruits of his ardu- of ‘I,’ i.e. doer-ship. We must ous labour, the man investigates cultivate the awareness that we into the cause. He discovers are able to work with God’s that one of the outlets in the grace and power. This is jnana tank has not been closed. Jnana in karma. Working with jnana is the understanding that if the and shraddha is karma yoga. outlet is not plugged, the tank If we can do every action with will never get filled, no matter utmost shraddha, we will be how much water one pours. able to forget ourselves. The Making efforts with this under- mind will become one-pointed standing is shraddha. Only if and we will experience bliss. one works with shraddha will This is where bhakti takes one reap the desired results. birth. In this way, if one works Five people were entrusted with shraddha and bhakti, one to do some agricultural work. will be able to reap the full One dug a hole. Another put fruit of action. When we get fertilizer in it. Another poured the fruit, faith is born. Such water. Another covered the faith is unshakeable. None will hole with soil. Even after many be able to disturb it. Shraddha, days, there was no sprout. In- bhakti, vishwas — work done vestigation revealed that the with shraddha increases one’s person who was supposed to devotion, which leads to faith. sow the seed did not do so. Most of the sacred texts in This is how action done with- Sanatana Dharma are in the out shraddha is. It will not give form of dialogs — the Guru’s the desired results. answers to the disciple’s doubts. In a similar way, the real The disciple has the freedom to intention behind every action keep asking until the doubt is

6 Matruvani wholly cleared. Thus, the dis- is blissful for one who lives in ciple’s shraddha2 increases. accordance with spiritual prin- Hindu dharma is not an- ciples. For him, life is a festival, tagonistic to anyone. It does not a celebration. What we need is ask anyone to renounce his or a path that will give us the her religion or faith. In fact, it experience of joy while living, considers undermining anoth- not after death. Just as one er’s faith unrighteous. Hindu needs to learn about business dharma regards all religions as management in order to do different paths leading to the business, one must know how same goal. It does not negate to manage life in order to make any path but embraces them all. it joyful. Sanatana Dharma is In short, for a Hindu, there is nothing other than the science no such thing as another reli- of holistic life management. gion. Such thinking prevailed Scriptures such as the Upan- in India. Adherents of any re- ishads, Bhagavad Gita, Brahmas- ligion could remain in their utras, Ramayana and Mahab- own faith and move ahead. harata embody eternal truths Doing so helped them reach that man in any age should their goal. Karma yoga, bhakti understand. They are not sec- yoga and jnana yoga are all as tarian, rather texts predicated relevant in this day and age, on reason and logic that is and can be practised by adher- practicable in life for anyone. ents of any religion. For one Therefore, just like medicine, who doesn’t know how to swim, psychology or sociology, any- the ocean and its waves are a one can understand the scrip- nightmare, whereas one who tures of Sanatana Dharma. knows swimming revels in the Doing so will pave the way for sea waves. In the same way, life the spiritual uplift and mate- rial prosperity of the entire 2 Here, shraddha also means faith. human race.

March 2016 7 SATSANG

Om vidya- avidya svaupinyai namah

by swami amritageetananda puri

uring a recent meditation session, Amma Dasked, “Children, what is the meaning of ‘vidya avidya swarupini?’1 How can Devi be of the form of knowledge and ignorance?” This was yet another one of Amma’s lilas (divine sport) to guide us deep into the na- ture of Devi, the Goddess, i.e. Amma’s real

1 Mantra 402 of the Lalita Sahasranama, a sacred litany of 1,000 names of the Divine Mother. ‘Om vidya-avidya swaru- pinyai namah’ = Salutations to the Divine Mother, who is of the form of both knowledge and ignorance.

8 Matruvani nature. If we could truly understanding, revelation and answer the question, we conviction, or, in other words, would realize Amma as the vidya. substratum of the entire cre- The three levels of experi- ation. Most of us know Am- ence we are familiar with are ma’s rupam, Her outer form, the waking state (in which we which we see in front of us. experience the outer world of But to know Amma’s swaru- forms), the dream state (in pam, Her essential cosmic, which we experience an inner imperishable nature, the only world created by our own way is to surrender to Her mind), and the deep sleep or totally. She will then reveal dreamless sleep state (wherein to us Her real nature. one experiences blissful noth- Knowledge and ignorance ingness, an absence of every- are opposed to each other, like thing). We express our experi- light and darkness. Where ence of this last state by saying, there is light, there cannot be “I didn’t know anything!” or “I darkness; where there is was aware of nothing!” The knowledge, ignorance cannot technical name for this state of exist. How then can Amma or ignorance is tamas. Devi is Devi be both knowledge (vidya) trigunatmika, i.e. one who and ignorance (avidya)? How wields three types of power or can both be Her swarupam? forms, viz. sattwa, rajas and Let us pray to Amma to en- tamas. Tamas is associated lighten us. When Amma asked with lethargy, indolence or us this question, we did not inactivity; rajas, with passion know the answer; i.e. we expe- and activity; and sattwa, with rienced ignorance (avidya) in light and understanding. We our minds. And when we get helplessly shunt back and forth the right answer, our ignorance from sattwa to rajas and tamas, will be replaced by knowledge, and back again to rajas and

March 2016 9 sattwa. We have only three hails Devi as the one, all- levels of experiences — wak- pervading reality appearing ing, dream and deep sleep. But as the entire creation with its there is another state: countless forms of living and vedaahametam purusham non-living beings. When mahaantam Devi appears before the de- aaditya varnam tamasah vas (gods) in Her Divine parastaat form, they are unable to un- I have known that Su- derstand Her. They ask, “Kaa preme Being, glorious like asi tvam?” — “Who are you, the sun and beyond all O effulgent being?” darkness. (Purusha Suktam, Devi explains Her true re- 2) ality to the devas. aham brahmaswarupini Beyond the ignorance of deep mattah prakriti sleep is the real awakening, purushaatmakam jagat which is as splendorous as the I am the all-pervading sun. Amma abides in that state. Brahman. From Me alone There is a beautiful hymn has arisen this creation in praise of Devi known as filled with sentient and ‘Devi Atharva Sheersham’ and it non-sentient beings. (verse appears in the Atharva Veda. A 2) part of the Devi Atharva Sheer- sham, the ‘Rg Vediya Devi Suk- In the fourth verse, She says, tam,’ teaches that everything vidya aham avidya aham in this universe is Devi’s form I am knowledge as well as and energy, that every mani- ignorance. festation is Devi’s — both that which manifests as Thus, any form of experience knowledge and ignorance. that takes place within our The Devi Atharva Sheersham minds and bodies is Her form.

10 Matruvani Just as Sri Krishna teaches She (Devi) alone has be- Arjuna, elaborating His glories come every being, includ- in various places from chapter ing the negative (evil) 7 to chapter 11, Sri Devi also forces like asuras, rakshas, tells the devas that, beginning pishaachis, yakshas and the from Brahma, Vishnu and powerful siddhas.3 Shiva,2 and including both positive and negative powers To say that Devi alone became in the world, “I alone appear as the asuras and that She alone all these powers. They all come destroys them might sound from Me and merge back into contradictory. If this seeming Me.” contradiction or confusion is With bowed heads and cleared, then we can under- folded hands, the Devas then stand the narrations in the Devi praise Devi. Mahatmyam, and we will not durgaam deveem saranam feel disturbed when we read prapadyaamahe, about the number of asuras asuraan naashayitryai te Goddess Durga destroyed. namah Devi Mahatmyam is a long nar- We take refuge in Durga ration of destruction. When Devi, who is the destroyer people ask, “The Universe of asuras (demons). (9) Mother is compassionate, but there is only destruction in Her But in the 17th verse, the gods avatars and lilas!” how would declare, we reply? saa eshaa yaatu dhaana Remember the mantra “Om asura rakshaamsi pishaaca mahagraasaayai namah!” from yakshaah siddhaah the Lalita Sahasranama? It

2 The Hindu Trinity, comprising the Creator, Preserver and Destroyer. 4 Fiends who are antagonistic to God and the good.

March 2016 11 means, “I bow to the Divine same substance. If we purge Mother, who is the great de- the devil of lethargy, lawless- vourer” (752). Mahakali swal- ness, lust, lies, loose talk and lows everything at the end of licentiousness, it will become the kalpa (cycle of creation). pure and merge into Devi. Consider the example Amma Some religions hold God as gives of gold and gold orna- good and the devil as perma- ments. Mahakali is like gold, nently bad. In John Milton’s the permanent reality, and the ‘Paradise Lost,’ a sinner “falls countless forms in the creation like Lucifer never to hope are like gold ornaments. The again.” In Hinduism, there is Universal Mother destroying hope for everyone. Even devil- the asuras is like the gold orna- ish beings are purified and ments merging into gold. Is merge into the Supreme Being. destruction really taking In some religions, the Lord of place? No. When gold ‘swal- Hell is wicked and opposed to lows’ gold ornaments, gold God and Good, but in Hindu- alone remains. Similar is the ism, the Lord of Hell is Yama- annihilation that the Divine dev, son of Surya (Sun) and Mother unleashes. The count- brother of Shani (Saturn) and less forms merge into their Yamuna, the sacred river. He source, Adi Parashakti, the is an ardent devotee of Lord Primal Supreme Power. As- Vishnu and a servant of Lord uras manifested from Her ta- Shiva. The most vicious devils masic aspect. like Hiranyakashipu, Hiran- ‘Devil’ minus ‘L’ = ‘Devi.’ yaksha and Ravana were in- This equation is hard to believe, carnations of the brothers Jaya but true! We learn in chemis- and Vijaya — doorkeepers at try that both charcoal and dia- Vaikuntha, the celestial abode monds are carbon. Similarly, of Lord Vishnu — whom sag- every one of us is made of the es had cursed to be born as

12 Matruvani The Universal Mother destroying the asuras is like the gold ornaments merging into gold. The countless forms merge into their source, Adi Parashakti, the Primal Supreme Power. asuras. When one’s tamas in- came into being. In other creases, one gets an asuric words, both gods and demons body. But inevitably, everyone have same source — Adi Par- is purified. All the demons ashakti, Primordial Energy, killed by the avatars of Vishnu and Vishnu, all-pervading and Devi merged into them. consciousness. The fifth chap- We call asuras and rakshasas ter of Devi Mahatmyam con- wicked and hate them. Amma cludes: calls them impure, showers citi roopena yaa kritsnam them with compassion, and etat vyaapya sthita jagat leads them to purity. Some of namastasyai namastasyai us have the habit of perma- namastasyai namo namah nently blacklisting people. She who pervades (enve- This is wrong. Even the worst lopes) the entire universe in the sinners are purified and can form of Consciousness, I bow attain liberation in Amma’s down to Her, the Universal divine presence. Brahma man- Mother, again and again. ifested from the eternal Vishnu. Devi alone appears in every From Brahma manifested form and She alone is the Sage Kashyapa. The gods source into which every form manifested from Aditi, one of merges. Kashyapa’s wives. From his At the end of the Devi Athar- other wife, Diti, the asuras va Sheersham, Devi is called

March 2016 13 ‘shoonya sakshini’ — one who is understand that we are always witness to a state of nothing- one with Her and not different ness, when the entire creation from Her. How do we start to merges into Her. But even know Her? Let us cultivate a when everything disappears, liking for silence. When we Devi remains, a witness to the chant the Lalita Sahasrama, for appearance and disappearance example, the sounds of chant- of every being. ing merge into silence; we Similarly, both vidya and become aware that sound avidya exist in awareness. merges into silence. Both Awareness is Amma’s real na- sound and silence exist in ture, and She will reveal to us pure awareness. that awareness is our real na- Let us meditate deeply. ture, too. Only a living spiritual master Amma wants us, Her chil- can take us deep into our real dren, to know Her completely. nature. With Her grace, let us When we do so, we will become one with Amma.

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14 Matruvani EXPERIENCE

Vow of Silence

by padma (corinne laveissière), france

n all honesty, I can tell Iyou that I like people. But when I look back on my life, I see a battlefield strewn with fallout from many re- lationships — brutal separa- tions, barbed words, shat- tering rage and recurrent conflicts when my obstinacy and kneejerk reactions got the better of my finer senti- ments. For someone who claims to like people, this is not a pretty sight.

March 2016 15 In November 2012, becom- provide an end date for these ing aware of my share of re- practices! sponsibility in this state of af- The most difficult thing was fairs, I sought Amma’s help. to set the day of silence in my My question was drawn from weekly timetable. Because I a hat at the Toulon program, was working, it could only be and I waited for my turn in the during the weekend. I started question line, a special place turning down those social en- where I could gaze at Amma. gagements that would jeopard- When I reached Her, the swa- ize my new sadhana (spiritual mi in charge of translation practice). I brushed off re- quietly read out my question: marks like: “Ammachi, what can I do to “But that’s not what silence improve my relationships with is! Silence is...” people?” She turned to me at “You should have said no. once and, with a profound and You don’t have to do it!” gentle gaze, laughed teasingly. “Why submit yourself to I understood this to mean: such a dreadful constraint?” “Wow, it’s taken you a long time In some cases, I met total to ask this question!” And then, incomprehension and even ag- in Her infinite compassion, she gression. But I stuck to my indicated two practices that guns. I heeded only Amma, my could heal these patterns. The beloved Guru. first was to observe silence for Unknown to me, silence was one day a week. The second moving into my life. My mind instruction Amma gave was was becoming calmer although this: “Even if it is just a thought some obsessive thoughts still that someone irritates or an- plagued it. Very often, on a noys you or makes you angry, speaking day, I kept silent in go and ask for his or her for- conversation. At other times, giveness.” Amma did not silence became contagious. I

16 Matruvani noticed that people around me how I was about to enter a long would also become silent, like period of silence the very next hearts beating in unison. day with Amma’s blessing. He A year and a half later, I ar- compassionately advised me to rived at Amritapuri for a stay observe a mandalam — a period that lasted several months. As of austerities lasting 41 days. soon as I arrived, my old pat- This would bring me up to terns arose, as if I hadn’t done May 11th. I took this to be a any work on myself at all. sign and recommendation When I spoke, people would get from Amma on the momentous up and leave, exasperated by eve of my silence. Gratitude my attitude or comments, or flooded my heart. both. Some people deliberately April 1st dawned over the avoided me. Others either didn’t ashram as I arose to start my acknowledge me or they pre- vow of silence. Although I had tended not to see me. The worst been observing a day’s silence experience was the break-up of every week for one-and-a-half a relationship with an old friend. years, this first day had a spe- This fiasco prompted me ask cial quality about it, as if I was Amma if I could observe silence about to embark on a long but for a longer period — a month uncharted journey. or even two. I had asked the seva desk for I set the date for April 1st. a task that would enable me to Until then, it felt like a count- be silent without it posing a down. Fear gnawed at me as problem for others. I knew the giant leap I was about to from experience that some make became imminent. On people don’t always take kind- the evening of March 31st, I ly to silence. The office sug- went to see one of the swamis gested I sweep up the dead in the ashram, Swami Pre- leaves near the Western Café. mananda Puri, and told him Strangely, this was just like the

March 2016 17 unofficial morning seva I used explain or justify myself with to do: sweeping up the dead words, I resorted in desperation leaves in the garden where the to mimics of exasperation and samadhi (memorial) of Amma’s sorry looks. My need for recog- father, Sugunanandan-acchan, nition, the way I had of poking is located. Sweeping away my nose into everyone’s busi- dead leaves like useless words, ness, and my impulsive reac- making the place look beauti- tions managed to muscle in and ful, clean and welcoming — I get in the way. These weak- had my work cut out for me! nesses undermined my resolve, On the evening of the ninth and I realized how they actu- day, I returned to see Swamiji. ally cut me off from my true He told me that if a word es- nature. I prayed to Amma to caped me, I would have to push remove these weaknesses; I back the final day of my vow. could not do it on my own. So, as my tongue had slipped It’s incredible how comfort- everyday on a “Sorry”, an “Om able silence can be. It’s reassur- Namah Shivaya” or a “Thank ing not to feel obliged to give an you,” I had to start over. Nine opinion to show you’re listening days down the drain. My si- when sincere attention is quite lence would now end only on enough. Moreover, I realize May 20th. that it’s best to avoid talking From that moment on, my about one’s experiences. No- days came under strict self- body is interested; some might surveillance. I noticed that, even misunderstand one’s inten- because I was so focused on tions. Remaining silent is the holding my tongue, my thoughts most intelligent thing to do. were no longer running riot. One morning, during the Was this peace of mind? Any- IAM (Integrated Amrita Med- way, keeping silent was far from itation), I wanted to yell; to talk plain sailing. Impossible to and talk and talk so that people

18 Matruvani would see me, notice me, re- bhajans. I went to help the girls member me. Silence was like who were clearing the path for dying a social death! It was like Amma. There was just so much disappearing into infinity. No! water that it was impossible to A wild roaring beast was strug- bail it all away. I was drenched gling within my being. Because from head to foot. In the shat- I did not give in to it, I felt the tering noise of the downpour, need to move, to feel my body one of the girls came to tell me moving. It was painful to expe- to stop what I was doing and rience the violence contained in check on the condition of the that desire. The solution that ramp. I didn’t realize then that came to me was to make room she wanted me to check if the in my heart for this flailing ramp that Amma would walk monster. The terrifying physi- down after bhajans was wet cal pain located in my right and dirty. Losing my concen- shoulder suddenly subsided. tration, I croaked “What for?” This incident helped me to un- My attention failed me two derstand that the ego is avid for more times. My period of si- expression, and that it is mor- lence was pushed back to May tally afraid of silence. This is 23rd instead of the 20th. one reason why it spews ba- The 25th day of my vow nalities and talks for the sake of was marked by the start of the talking. Becoming truly silent short Kerala tour with Amma. prevents the ego from existing. The atmosphere was efferves- Without the vehicle of body or cent as I climbed aboard the word, it melts away. coach, happy to do my first One evening, during bha- tour in India. Once I had jans, there was a powerful found my seat, it was hard for storm that uprooted two trees. me to get my bearings without The wind blew rain into the hall being able to ask questions. It where devotees were seated for was sheer inner mayhem! I

March 2016 19 became prey to certain people became tough. The silence who felt the need to wield became oppressive. The heat power. Vulnerable and de- weighed down on me. I felt as fenceless, I felt alone and frag- if the ashram was closing in on ile in a world that seemed to me. I was lonely, exhausted belong only to English speak- and extremely aggravated. But ers, and where silence was an the days that followed were all added handicap. It was impos- so different. The next day, I felt sible to get information. And what a blessing silence was! I yet, I have to admit that, felt like my mind had been thanks to those few individu- cleaned out; not emptied, but als who gave me a hard time, cleaned, as if a big mental I got a taste of the violence that spring cleaning had been done. some people had suffered be- On the last day, I dreamt cause of my impatience and that I was placing the dead my judgment! This made me leaves I had swept up at the very sad. In deep despair, I foot of an altar. As I was mak- took refuge in Amma. ing a mandala (circular design) Since I started my vow of with these leaves, I realized silence, the five darshans I joy- that this offering was relevant fully received were different. It to what I had thought at the was as if Amma was monitor- beginning of my silence: ing my progress step by step. “sweeping up leaves like so She whispered unpronounce- many useless words…” able words that operated on Determination and Amma’s and healed my ignorance. I presence helped me stay alert surrendered to Her infinite and focused. It was this alert- compassion, aware of my im- ness that enabled silence to measurable good fortune. suffuse my being. Silence is the Ten days before the end of natural state of being. It is my period of silence, things home to the Supreme Self.

20 Matruvani

Omkara Divya Porule

by swami tureeyamritananda puri (dedicated to Amma on the occasion of Her 56th Birthday)

Just as we remain bound when we believe we are bound, we spontaneously become liberated when we break the sorrowful spell of bondage.

The value of chanting and meditation will never depreciate at all. The refinement of character gained through lifetimes will stand us in good stead.

The Self is eternally effulgent. The Truth is never affected by lethargy. However, even in full daylight, the eyes of the blind continue to spin in darkness.

Darshan can be seen in two ways—remember that it is both reality and illusion. That which is of the singular nature of the Self is the worshipful reality, and diversity is illusion.

Desire breeds sorrow. A society riddled with desire becomes the subject of ridicule. A mind that habitu- ates itself to the darkness of ignorance sees even evil as good.

22 Matruvani Those enslaved by tamas (lethargy) soon become habitu- ated to laziness. Those with nothing but selfish thoughts are deserving of contempt.

The quality of rajas (passion) leads one to wrong deeds and incites one to hurt others. Such a person is not useless to himself, he also dampens the peace of others.

The sattvic (calm and peace-loving) one sees only the good, and is keen on the welfare of all. Forgetting himself, his very life pulsates with thoughts on how to uplift others.

If one’s aim it to rise above all attributes, the path one takes must be clear. Passion that serves calmness inspires the wellbeing of the world.

The enemy of one’s own mind is always one’s own mind. The noble one who conquers the foe with friendship is friend to the whole world.

Love is absent everywhere. The cries of the wretched are wracking the ears. Anger, bred by desire, is scorching the world.

When love throbs in the heart, all differences vanish. Darling children, shrug off all doubts and heed Mother’s words. (to be continued)

March 2016 23 EXPERIENCE

Anointed with Love by sharadamani (as told to lalitha unny), india

was born into a family of Sri Ramakrishna IParamahamsa devotees, and it was only natu- ral that I was exposed to many of His teachings while young. As a child, I used to read His books repeatedly and would feel sad thinking that I had not been His contemporary. When I met a person who spoke to me about Amma — Her divine

24 Matruvani moods, the miracles She per- standing right in front of formed, and how She had Amma! During that first meet- licked the wounds of the leper ing with Amma, I broke down Dattan to cure him — I was and cried, unable to stop the not really impressed. However, torrent of my tears. Who can I sensed that Amma was an explain the presence of God, extraordinary phenomenon the bliss that pulses in the and prayed fervently to Ram- heart when it finally reaches akrishna Paramahamsa to its goal? I told myself: “I am throw some light on this mar- Amma’s child now; or was vel: was she or was she not a Amma mine?” divine incarnation? When Sri Ramakrishna Soon thereafter, I came Paramahamsa was about to across a book on Amma, ‘Yagna leave his mortal body, on see- Prasadam,’ written by Ottoor ing the pain of His devotees, Unni Namboodiri, the author He had promised that he would of Amma’s Ashtottaram (108 at- return to a place surrounded tributes). In it, he wrote that by water, that a lot of ‘white’ Amma was enacting in Amri- devotees would come to Him, tapuri the same divine drama and that He would resume His that Ramakrishna Parama- divine mission then. My con- hamsa and Sharada Devi, His viction that Amma was indeed consort, had enacted in Dak- Ramakrishna Paramahamsa shineswar more than 100 years and Sharada Devi combined ago. Reading this, I felt that I propelled me towards Her like had to meet Amma at once. nothing else. My husband and I went to My elder son joined the see Her and joined the darshan ashram as a brahmachari line. Imagine my surprise when there was an acute short- when someone came to reshuf- age of food, water and proper fle the queue, and we emerged accommodation facilities. As a

March 2016 25 result, my son, who had known attending to him found that the no hunger, became emaciated. top of his head had become My mind wept in pain, and I very soft. When I ran my fin- turned to Amma’s book — a gers over his head, I found that habit I had of opening the book they were right. We immedi- at random and finding the ately contacted the doctors, answer to my problems. The who said that he might need to following lines stared at me: undergo emergency surgery of “My children should be thin, the skull. with their stomachs caved in. On returning to the ashram, Only then will their faces shine, I cried myself to sleep, pleading making them look like coura- with Amma to intervene. I had geous lions. Their inner spir- a very vivid dream. I was itual bliss must be reflected on standing in front of a Devi their faces.” My heart missed temple and the doors to the a beat. How blessed I was to sanctum sanctorum were closed have a son like him! In this way, as I waited. Suddenly, the Amma broke the bond of at- doors opened and a pujari tachment I had for my son. I (priest) came out and poured could see clearly that he was liquid ghee on the crown of my really Amma’s son. head. The experience was so In 2001, my younger son, real that I could feel the ghee Sudeep, met with an accident for a long time after I woke up. and was admitted to the Am- I felt that this was a message rita Institute of Medical Sci- from Amma though I was un- ences (AIMS Hospital) in a able to decipher its meaning. serious condition. I would So I did not confide in anyone finish my ashram seva (selfless about the dream. service) by afternoon and As usual, I went for my seva visit him every evening. On the the next morning and reached third day, the brahmacharis the hospital by evening. My

26 Matruvani son and his attendant looked them to Amma when I visited happy. The attendant said, the ashram that weekend. “Something wonderful hap- However, my son came down pened yesterday. Touch his with high fever, forcing me to head now. It’s hard again, not cancel my trip. I was bitterly soft like it was yesterday. disappointed. I cried a lot and Amma rang up last night and told myself, “Amma has so asked, ‘How is Sudeep?’ When many children. Why should I told Her what the doctors had She care about me and my lit- said, Amma said, ‘No opera- tle gift?” While crying, a car tion! Give the phone to Su- screeched to a halt in front of deep.’ She asked him, ‘How are our house. An acquaintance you? No need to worry. Amma stepped out and said, “I was is with you. Kisses to you!’” passing by on my way to the The next morning, a team ashram, when I felt an irresist- of doctors arrived at 9:00 a.m., ible urge to ask you if you each one looking for the tender would like to accompany me.” spot on his head. There was no Amma had heard my prayer! trace of it! Sudeep’s head was I realized that Amma cannot as hard as a head should be! bear to see Her children in When the doctors left, I told tears. If I could not take the everyone about my dream. fruits to Her, She would come I would like to mention a few and take them from me! Off I among the innumerable occa- went to get the fruits and load sions when Amma fulfilled my them into his car. heartfelt desires. In the early years of the In my garden, there used to ashram, the morning archana be an old jackfruit tree that (chanting of a litany of sacred bore excellent fruit. One year, names) used to take place in I plucked three of the biggest the kalari, the temple where jackfruits, intending to offer Amma used to give Devi Bhava

March 2016 27 and Krishna Bhava darshans. “Amma has asked you to lead Bri. (Dr.) Leela (now Swamini the archana today.” I thought, Atma Prana) used to lead the “Me? A mere householder asked archana, and the rest would to lead the archana?” Later, I respond. One day, she started learned that Amma had come coughing badly and turned down from Her room and around to ask the woman be- stood for some time, listening hind her if she could take over. to me as I led the archana. This woman refused and Bri. Countless are the occasions Leela continued with great dif- when Amma has shown that ficulty. I wanted to take over, She cares, that She is aware of but did not dare to ask. I kept every thought that passes my desire a secret. Imagine my through Her child’s mind, and surprise when Bri. Leela came that She is always willing to running the next day to the fulfil all those little desires that meditation hut, where we were will keep us away from trouble all sitting together, and said, and lead us closer to Her.

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28 Matruvani VILLAGE

Her Unseen Feet by vickram, india

uptapada, a scenic village in the Indian state of GOdisha, is situated 25 – 30 kilometres away from Bhubaneswar, the state’s capital. It was one of the vil- lages that the M.A. Math adopted as part of the Amrita-SeRVE (Self-Reliant Village) project, which was launched during Amritavarsham60, Amma’s 60th birthday celebrations. We — nine colleagues from the Amrita Center for Wireless Networks and Applications (Amrita WNA), a research centre of Amrita Univer- sity focused on emerging wireless and mobile network- ing technology — were given the responsibility of providing water for sanitation purposes to homes in

March 2016 29 the village as part of Amrita- That evening, we made a varsham62, Amma’s 62nd birth- short survey of the village, day celebrations. located about 15 kilometres With Amma’s blessings, we away from the Amrita Vidya- left Amritapuri on September layam. To minimize travelling, 10th, 2015. After a bus ride to we decided to move to the vil- Chennai, we boarded the Co- lage school in order to start romandel Express on Septem- work. There were only two ber 11th. During the train classrooms in that school; the journey to Bhubaneswar, we villagers graciously provided discussed plans for the project us one for our accommodation. and shared our previous expe- We learned that the other riences with village projects. classroom was used for teach- We planned as extensively as ing children from first to fifth we could, but told ourselves to grades. If they wished to pur- expect nothing to go according sue secondary education after to plan! fifth grade, the children would We reached Bhubaneswar have to travel a distance of on September 12th, and went about six kilometres, which straight to the local Amrita they would do only if a bicycle Vidyalayam (school). Before was available. Most homes had visiting the village, Br. Dur- one bicycle each, but it was gaprasad, brahmachari in generally used by the elders. charge of the local ashram, Many children were interested gave us valuable insights on his in studying but were deterred experience with the village. He by the inconvenience. Not sur- said that though the villagers prisingly, the general standard are a contented lot despite their of education in the village was material poverty, it was our very low. Some of them even duty to do whatever we could asked us if Amma would pro- to uplift them materially. vide them with bicycles.

30 Matruvani The children and teenagers family was `3,000. The diet of who did not go to school spent the villagers was restricted to most of the day idling, not dal-chawal (dhal and rice). knowing what to do. They Many, especially the children, were very curious about what were malnourished. Sanitation we had studied, what we did was also a problem. There was for a living, what cities looked only one toilet in the whole like, and how we reached Bhu- village; the government had baneswar, among other things. constructed it for the school. Most of them had never stepped The villagers were used to out of their village, owing to a defecating in the open and lack of money. Everybody ex- probably not too aware about pressed a desire to meet Amma. toilets until Ammachi Labs1 There were 60 houses and started building them. Our job 300 inhabitants in the village. was to provide taps to all Most of the villagers spoke houses so that they would have only Oriya; a few teenagers water for sanitation purposes. knew Hindi as well. Almost all There were a total of four the houses had electricity con- hand pumps in the whole vil- nections, and around 20 hous- lage. Every time the villagers es had television sets. The main needed water, they would have occupation of the villagers was to carry their vessels to the gathering firewood from the nearest hand pump and then surrounding forest and bun- carry the heavy pots of water dling them for sale. Each bun- back home. It was a tough job, dle, comprising 25 – 30 sticks, but the village women had would fetch a meagre `3. The become used to it. We first monthly average salary of a marked out the areas we would

1 Amrita Multi Modal Applications and Computer Human Interaction Labs, which provides vocational training.

March 2016 31 dig for the main four-inch- for the main pipeline and pipeline. The plan was to lay around 500 meters for the tap- these pipes throughout the vil- ping lines. lage, thus bringing the main At one end of the village, line to all the houses, and then there was a house occupied by tap ¾-inch pipes from the main an elderly couple. When we line to each individual house. asked them about where they We went to every house in wanted the tap, they humbly the village to ask where the replied that they did not want family wanted the tap. We water. Naturally, we were sur- marked the areas they specified, prised. When we inquired and then asked them to dig a further, we learned that they foot-long ditch to the main line. were too frail to do any dig- ging, and had no one else to Digging and Designing help them. They did not want Digging the main line, which to impose on anyone. So, we we had to do manually, was the dug a ditch from the main line most time-consuming part of to a spot right in front of their the project. We could not use house. Providing them with bulldozers or mechanical exca- water was, for us, one of the vators because the paths were most deeply satisfying mo- too narrow. We dug two feet ments of the whole project. deep for the main pipelines and During the 10 days, we also a foot deep for the tapping line. designed a steel structure for We took almost 10 days to the tank and decided on the complete the digging work, in source of water. One of the which the teenagers and chil- hand pumps situated at the dren of the village helped; the entrance to the village was adults would join in occasion- replaced by submersible motors, ally. By September 23rd, we which served as the water had dug almost 1.25 kilometres source for the whole village.

32 Matruvani On September 23rd, we dug four squarish pits, each four feet deep, for the concrete foundation of the tank. We placed concrete cylindrical rings in the pits and prepared fresh concrete to hold the rings in place. By September 25th, the fixing and welding of the steel structure began, and the precision. We fixed 40 taps in erection of the structure was accordance with the demand completed on September 29th of the villagers. The taps were with the help of a local work- concreted so that they would shop in Bhubaneswar. A crane not break easily. The villagers was used to fix the steel struc- did all the concrete filling for ture legs, and mount both the the taps. By the evening of base of the tank and the September 29th, the steel 5,000-liter tank on it. All the structure work was completed, plumbing material we ordered all the pipes connections were arrived on the night of Septem- laid, and the taps were fixed. ber 24th. So, as workers put up We tested the whole system the the steel structure on Septem- next day. ber 25th, we laid the main line The first step was to fill the pipes with the help of a plumb- tank to its capacity of 5,000 li- er and the village teenagers. It tres. An electrical board was took us two days to lay the installed to operate the sub- main pipeline. We hired more mersible motor. It took almost plumbers to finish work on the five hours to fill the tank to tapping line, because fixing capacity. We had placed two and drilling of the converters ball valves on the main line to demanded expertise and high cut off and regulate water

March 2016 33 supply as needed, especially for television, which shows Hindi maintenance and repair pur- films and Oriya serials. They poses. When we opened the had also spoken about how valves, the water started flow- inconvenient it was for women ing through all the taps, much to answer the calls of nature. to our relief and elation. But in Toilets would offer them much moments, we learned that one need privacy. The villagers pipe was leaking badly. We also reported the frequent in- spent a few more hours working cidence of high fever, owing to with plumbers to diagnose the the lack of hygiene. Providing cause and fix the problem. Fi- water to their houses has given nally, we installed an auto- them immediate access to bet- matic water level controller that ter sanitation. Further, it has would control the filling of the inspired them to start building tank based on preset threshold toilets for their homes with the values. Thus, through 40 taps, help of Ammachi Labs mem- we managed to provide water bers. Ammachi Labs is also to all 60 houses in the village. helping the villagers generate income through the efficient Impact of water supply on use of available natural re- villagers sources, such as banana plan- Bringing water to their door- tations. step is, together with building For the villagers, contact toilets, one of the first big steps with the people like us has towards development. When given them the confidence that we first spoke to the villagers, Amma will take care of them many had expressed the hope and their village. The M.A. that their village would be- Math is the first organization come well-developed. They live they have ever encountered secluded lives. Their sole win- that has done constructive dow to the world is the work in the village. Bringing

34 Matruvani water to their homes was, for occasion for serving others. I them, a strong signal of our feel sure we were making Her good intention. happy by doing our bit to help the villagers. Missing Amma’s Birthday Amma kept tab on our work Celebrations throughout the project. She Initially, our plan was to finish would ask the director of Am- the project and reach Amrita- rita WNA, and knowing this, puri in time for Amritavarsh- we would feel more inspired am62. But things did not hap- and motivated. pen according to plan and we missed Amma’s birthday cele- Challenges brations. We were disappointed. All of us were accommodated But much to our surprise, some in a single room, which also of the village women came in happened to be the storeroom the evening with a plate full of for plumbing tools! The room gulab jamun,2 which they placed would become very hot at reverentially before Amma’s nights. Attracted to the light in photo in the room. They then lit the room, bees would visit… few candles and sang “Happy and sting us. One of us was Birthday” in English! It was stung while sleeping! touching to see the villagers It would get dark by 5:30 expressing their love for Amma p.m. and we would not be able in their own style. Seeing their to do any work after that. In devotion to Amma and the order to get a phone signal in pains they were taking to cheer our room, we would have to us up, we felt much better. walk 100 meters. For food, we Amma has often said that Her would travel 20 kilometres birthday should be yet another from the village.

2 Deep-fried curd-cheese balls in a solution of sugar syrup.

March 2016 35 When we went, there was pickaxe or plough was used to only one toilet in the whole loosen the soil, and the hoe, to village. When someone wanted remove the loosened soil. Or, to use the toilet, he would have we would use just the hoe to to fetch water from a hand keep cutting into the earth. pump. Because there were al- The pickaxe was not too wieldy; most 10 of us using the toilet, it was very heavy, and much the septic tank filled up soon, effort was needed to loosen the and excreta started clogging soil. Digging with the hoe was the duct. So, we had to arrange faster if the soil was not too for the cleaning of the sewers hard. When the soil was hard, as well. we found it more profitable to There is a big pond in the use the pickaxe and hoe in village, where all the villagers tandem. While using the hoe bathe and wash their clothes. to dig, the deeper we dug, the Given the situation with the more we had to bend to remove toilet, many of us from the uni- the soil. It was back-breaking versity also went to the pond to work for us, accustomed to bathe. Two of my colleagues working at office desks with contracted an ear infection, computers. By the time we which culminated in high fever. finished, all of us had acquired We took them to a hospital, sup- a new respect and appreciation posedly the best in town. But for labourers. the doctor there did not even Compounding this chal- diagnose the infection; he treat- lenge were extreme weather ed only the fever. The two of conditions. We had to dig in them had to put up with the scorching heat and heavy rain. painful ear infection until the When it rained, the soil would end of the project. become soggy and sticky, and Digging involved using more effort was needed to grub hoes and pickaxes. The remove it. We also had to clear

36 Matruvani dense vegetation in order to the villagers. Nevertheless, we dig. Given Amma’s repeated would just turn up and start insistence on protecting and digging even though we were conserving nature, we were much less efficient diggers than loathe to uproot so many the villagers. One of my col- plants. We tried our best to leagues would travel from minimize damage to the flora. house to house, soliciting help, We also shaped the pathway and eventually, a few villagers so that bigger plants and trees would come. We decided to were left untouched. While provide food for those who digging, we would encounter helped us. For four days, we roots of trees. We had to use provided food to 10 – 20 peo- the cutter repeatedly to break ple; on another day, we catered the tough roots, and this took to 40 villagers. a lot of time. In some places, There were occasions when the soil was so hard and com- work did not seem to progress pact that even after relentless at all. Those moments were digging, we would unearth really trying. All that we only a little soil. Very soon, could do then was to do what- our hands developed blisters, ever we could and leave the which healed only after sev- rest to God. Of course, we did eral weeks. Some of us devel- not always have such a philo- oped severe back pain, which sophical attitude. The frus- slowed down our digging. Of trating moments magnified course, the villagers, espe- the fact that we, and the vil- cially the enthusiastic teenag- lagers, did not have access to ers, rendered help, without proper basic amenities. This which we would not have was probably the hardest made much headway. thing to deal with for most of But there were days when us. Doubts and scepticism we did not receive help from would sometimes get the

March 2016 37 better of us, leading to a nook of India that I learned negative frame of mind. In something of surrender in hindsight, I realized that if practice. As I look back on the food, shelter, etc. had been project, I still wonder how we readily available, we would managed to provide water to not have appreciated the lot of 60 homes. Did we really do so the villagers as much. much work on our own? When I ponder over this question, I Reflection am reminded of Lord Krish- Our village experience re- na’s words to Arjuna: vealed how much we take for Therefore, arise and win granted. Many of us live in glory. Conquer the ene- solid, well-built homes, have mies and enjoy the flour- good food to eat, and fine ishing kingdom. They clothes to wear, apart from a have already been slain by whole lot of other amenities. It Me. Just be My instru- took spending a few days in the ment, O archer by my side. village to make us realize just (Bhagavad Gita, 11.33) how blessed we were. It also enlarged our sympathies for In the same spirit, I believe the less-privileged in India and Amma had already finished the world. It was a truly hum- the work even before we bling experience for me. stepped foot in Guptapada; all Eventually, everything fell we had to do was to turn up in place and culminated in the and play our humble role as rapid completion of the project. instruments in Her hand. In- Personally, despite the chal- terestingly, ‘guptapada’ liter- lenges I faced, I felt that the ally means ‘hidden feet.’ Had whole experience had been Amma’s unseen feet already spiritually enriching and in- trod this land, thus sanctifying sightful. It was in this hidden it?

38 Matruvani March 2016 39 40 Matruvani March 2016 41 Amma’s North Indian Tour 2016

March 29 Amdavad Public Program April 1 Jaipur Public Program April 4 – 5 New Delhi Brahmasthanam Festival April 8 Vrindavan Public Program April 10 Lucknow Public Program April 13 – 14 Kolkata Brahmasthanam Festival

Statement of Ownership and other particulars about Newspaper (Matruvani) Form IV (See Rule 8) 1. Place of Publication : Amritapuri 2. Periodicity of Publication : Monthly. 22nd of every calendar month 3. Printer’s Name : Swami Jnanamritananda Puri Nationality : Indian Address : Mata Amritanandamayi Math, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam 4. Publisher’s Name : Swami Jnanamritananda Puri Nationality : Indian Address : Mata Amritanandamayi Math, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam 5. Editor’s Name : Br. Brahmamrita Chaitanya Nationality : Indian Address : Mata Amritanandamayi Math, Amritapuri P.O., Kollam 6. Owner’s Name : Mata Amritanandamayi Mission Trust I, Swami Jnanamritananda Puri, hereby declare that the particulars given above are true to the best of my knowledge and belief. Date: March 1st, 2016

Swami Jnanamritananda Puri, Publisher

42 Matruvani