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Catholic Community / Comunidad Católica Catholic Community / Comunidad Católica Measuring Ourselves in Love Midiéndonos en el Amor When I was younger, I was pretty confident that I knew what Cuando era más joven, estaba muy seguro de que sabía lo que love meant. significaba el amor. Después de todo, todos experimentamos el amor de alguna manera, estar enamorados, amar a alguien, ser After all, we all experience love in some way: being in love, amados por alguien. Prácticamente todos han conocido el amor loving someone, being loved by someone. Virtually everyone de alguien, un amigo, un miembro de la familia, un conocido. has known the love of somebody, a friend, a family member, an acquaintance. Pero a medida que me hago más viejo, pregunto a veces, si yo, o la mayoría de las personas, conocemos el sentido de lo que But the older I get the more I wonder sometimes whether I, or realmente significa esa palabra sobre usada, amor. Cuando most anyone else, has much sense of what that over-used word, somos honestos, sentimos nuestra propia distancia de su love, really means? When we are honest, we sense our own significado completo. ¿Por qué? distance from its full meaning. Why? Porque, a medida que envejecemos, más comenzamos a Because, the older we get, the more we also begin to know conocer el lado oscuro del amor. Estas experiencias son love’s dark side. Too common are these experiences: we fall in demasiado comunes: nos enamoramos y pensamos que durará love and think it will last forever, but then fall out of love, feel para siempre, pero luego nos desenamoramos, sentimos que el love go sour, feel love grow cold, see love betrayed, feel amor se agria, sentimos que el amor se enfría, vemos el amor ourselves wounded by love, and wound others. Finally, even traicionado, nos sentimos heridos por el amor y herimos a otros. more upsetting, we all find that there are always people in our Finalmente, aún más molesto, todos encontramos que siempre hay personas en nuestras vidas que son frías, amargadas e lives who are cold, bitter, and unforgiving towards us so that it implacables con nosotros, por lo que no siempre es fácil sentir is not always easy to feel love and be loving. amor y ser amoroso. In the light of this reticence, I would like comment on Jesus' A la luz de esta reticencia, me gustaría comentar sobre el most important commandment: “Love one another as I have mandamiento más importante de Jesús: "¡Ámense los unos a los loved you!” otros como yo los he amado!" Too easily we read his command simplistically, romantically, Leímos muy fácilmente eso de manera simplista, romántica y and in a one-sided, over-confident manner. But this command de una manera unilateral y muy confiada. Pero este mandato contains the most important challenge of the whole gospel and, contiene el desafío más importante de todo el evangelio y, like the deepest part of the gospel to which it is linked, the como la parte más profunda del evangelio al que está vinculado, crucifixion, it is very, very difficult to imitate. Why? la crucifixión, es muy, muy difícil de imitar. ¿Por qué? Blessed Sacrament Catholic Community - www.blessedsacramentnc.org - 1620 Hanford Rd., Graham, NC 27253 (336) 226-8796 It's easy to consider ourselves as loving if we only look at one Es fácil considerarnos amorosos si solo miramos un lado de las side of things, namely, how we relate to those people who are cosas, es decir, cómo nos relacionamos con aquellas personas que loving, warm, respectful, and gracious towards us. If we rate son amorosas, cálidas, respetuosas y amables con nosotros. Si ourselves on how we feel about ourselves in our best moments nos calificamos sobre cómo nos sentimos acerca de nosotros among like-minded friends, we can easily conclude both that mismos en nuestros mejores momentos entre amigos de ideas we are loving persons and that we are measuring up to Jesus’ semejantes, podemos concluir fácilmente que somos personas command to love as he did. amorosas y que estamos a la altura del mandato de Jesús de amar como él lo hizo. But if we begin to look at the skeletons in our relational closets, our naive confidence soon disappears: What about the Pero si comenzamos a mirar los esqueletos en nuestros closets de people who hate us, whom we don't like? What about the relacionales, nuestra ingenua confianza pronto desaparecerá: people whom we avoid and who avoid us? What about those ¿qué pasa con las personas que nos odian, a quienes no nos caen bien? ¿Qué pasa con las personas que evitamos y que nos evitan? people towards whom we feel resentment? What about all ¿Qué pasa con aquellas personas que sentimos resentimiento? those people with whom we are at odds, towards whom we feel ¿Qué pasa con todas esas personas con quienes estamos en suspicion, coldness, anger? What about those people whom we desacuerdo, con quienes sentimos desconfianza, frialdad, ira? haven't been able to forgive? ¿Qué pasa con aquellas personas que no hemos podido perdonar? It’s one thing to love someone who adores you, it's quite Una cosa es amar a alguien que te adora, ¡otra muy distinta amar another to love someone who wants you dead! a alguien que te quiere muerto! But that's the real test. Jesus’ command to love contains a Pero esa es la verdadera prueba. El mandato de Jesús de amar critical subordinate clause, “as I have loved you!” What was contiene una cláusula subordinada crítica, "¡como te he amado!" unique in the way he loved us? ¿Qué era único en la forma en que nos amaba? Where Jesus stretches us beyond our natural instincts and Donde Jesús nos extiende más allá de nuestros instintos naturales beyond all self-delusion is in his command to love our y más allá de todo autoengaño, está en su orden de amar a enemies, to be warm to those who are cold to us, to be kind to nuestros enemigos, de ser cálidos con los que son fríos con those who are cruel to us, to do good to those who hate us, to nosotros, de ser amables con los que son crueles con nosotros, de forgive those who hurt us, to forgive those who won't forgive hacer el bien a aquellos que nos odian, a perdonar a quienes nos us, and to ultimately love and forgive those who are trying to lastiman, a perdonar a quienes no nos perdonarán y, finalmente, a kill us. amar y a perdonar a quienes intentan matarnos. That command—love and forgive your enemies—more than Ese mandato—amar y perdonar a tus enemigos, más que any creedal formula or other moral issue, is the litmus-test for cualquier fórmula de credo u otro problema moral, es la prueba Christian discipleship. We can ardently believe in and defend de fuego para el discipulado cristiano. Podemos creer every item in the creed and fight passionately for justice in all fervientemente y defender cada elemento del credo y luchar its dimensions, but the real test of whether or not we are apasionadamente por la justicia en todas sus dimensiones, pero la followers of Jesus is the capacity or non-capacity to forgive an verdadera prueba de si somos seguidores de Jesús es la capacidad enemy, to remain warm and loving towards someone who is o no de perdonar a un enemigo, de mantenernos cálidos. y not warm and loving to us. amando a alguien que no es cálido y amoroso con nosotros. We shouldn't delude ourselves on this. It is easy to rationalize No debemos engañarnos con esto. Es fácil racionalizar esto y, si this away and, if we do, no doubt there will be more than lo hacemos, sin duda habrá más que suficientes falsos amigos enough false friends around who will furnish us with both alrededor que nos darán argumentos teológicos y psicológicos theological and psychological arguments that will justify us in que nos convencerían para no amar a nuestros enemigos. Pero el not loving our enemies. But the gospel is uncompromising: We evangelio nunca cambiara: Somos amorosos no en la forma de are loving not on the basis of how we respond to those who cómo respondemos con quienes nos aman, sino en la forma de cómo respondemos con quienes nos odian, y somos fríos, hostiles love us, but on the basis of how we respond to those who hate y asesinos hacia nosotros. us, and are cold, hostile, and murderous toward us. That's the hard, non-negotiable truth underlying Jesus’ Esa es la dura verdad, y no negociable que subyace en el mandato de Jesús de amar y, cuando somos honestos, tenemos que admitir command to love, and when we are honest, we have to admit que todavía estamos muy lejos de estar a la cima de eso. that we are still a long way from measuring up to that. There’s a sobering challenge in an old Stevie Nicks' song, Hay un desafío serio en una vieja canción de Stevie Nicks, “Golddust Woman” sugiere que es bueno que, en un momento de “Golddust Woman”: she suggests that it's good that, at a point la vida, alguien "rompa nuestra ilusión de amor" porque con in life, someone “shatters our illusion of love” because far too mucha frecuencia, ciego a sus propias intenciones verdaderas, often, blind to its own true intentions, our love is manipulative nuestro amor es manipulador y egoísta. Muy a menudo, señala la and self-serving.
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