Going out with a bang - The Wessex Sport: South Varsity last issue of 2006/2007! action & more BUSA glory wessex 18th May 2007 Worth it’s weight in paper SCENE News Recognition for University and bars, but tragic student death

Features Top 10 places to be Scene2... dumbness and Moore Lifestyle Exam tips & a tour round the unseen Cutbacks leave sculpture students in a Winchester of discontent Christine Couldwell been jeopardised.” School has admitted this, insti- they are doing all they can to im- Southampton WSA has seen a significant gating a series of open forums prove the situation at Winches- Dramatic changes in the run- change of style in its running for students to voice their opin- ter. We will keep working with ning of Winchester School of Art following the arrival two years ions. them to ensure the best possible have resulted in no requirement ago of a new Head of School Dan Hemsley, WSA Stu- deal for everyone up there.” Music for a foundation year, grossly di- who, in a recent student dents’ Union President, told the “While the changes may not minished lecturer hours, smaller meeting, indicated the neces- Wessex Scene: “I think it’s no- have pleased everyone and will studio spaces and a general air sity of increasing the number ticeable now that the problems take some time to adjust to, the A song & dance of student discontent, culminat- of students at the School in have arisen from a lack of cor- situation we are in now is far ing in the lodging of a formal order to prevent closure. rect communication with the better than the alternative - clos- for Europe, The complaint by third-year Sculp- However, a higher intake students. The changes haven’t ing of Winchester School of Art, ture students. has resulted in the school’s been apparent enough and which was a very real possibility Edge’s summer Although all students have once highly-valued reputa- that’s led to rumour and specu- if the status quo was maintained been affected, Sculpture stu- tion fast diminishing amid lation.” up there.” guide dents have been especially ag- these cutbacks. The new en- SUSU President Ben Rogers Head of School Bashir Ma- grieved, suffering an 85% re- trants are no less talented but said: “The Students’ Union is khoul was unavailable for com- duction in visiting lecturer hours now lack the foundation ex- very concerned about the issues ment as he has been abroad for Film from 82 days just two years ago perience. raised from students at Winches- the past few days. to 12 days this year, equating to Much anger has been di- ter School of Art, and we have The aim of the complaint is to 28 30 minutes per student for the rected towards the new Head been working with the Head either achieve the reinstatement entire academic year. of School with the appear- of School and senior University of the previous number of visit- weeks Piers Candy, a third-year ance of rebellious graffiti in management to ensure that the ing lecturer hours or, at worst, sculpture student, said: “It is un- the corridors resulting in a changes are being communicat- receive a refund in tuition fees. later, fortunate that it has hit us in the security presence at his Win- ed to the students and that As a compromise, sculpture stu- year of our degree show when, chester Gallery private view. these issues are being ad- dents have been given six more Spiderman 3 without the benefit of adequate Students have expressed dressed.” days of visiting lecturer hours direction from internal lecturers concern at the lack of com- “The reaction from the Uni- but students still feel that more crawls out and external practising artists, I munication about the new versity has been very positive should be done. The complaint feel that our progress will have developments. The Head of and the Union is confident that will continue to be pursued.

www.bamuk.com Student Media Buyers www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 Local News

Page 2 Lucky number 13

Southampton records highest-ever placing in prestigious Guardian University Guide Hannah Slater result there have been a lot of changes since last year, which The University of Southampton means the tables are not strictly The top 10 has been ranked 13th in the comparable with previous years. and selected other 2008 Guardian University Guide Vice Chancellor Professor Bill establishements - a huge leap of 24 places since Wakeham, said: “I am delighted were as follows: last year. to see that the Guardian ranking For the second year running reflects the increasing recogni- 1. Oxford Electronic and Electrical Engi- tion of Southampton’s excel- 2. Cambridge neering has received the top rat- lence and further underlines our 3. Imperial College ing in the subject polls. position as one of the UK’s top 4. St Andrews Other subjects making the universities.” 5. UCL top ten in the Guardian tables Students around campus 6. LSE are Archaeology, Chemistry, have expressed their pleasure 7. Edinburgh Computer Science, Earth and at Southampton’s position in 8. Warwick Marine Sciences, Civil Engineer- the poll. One student told the 9. Loughborough ing, Mechanical Engineering, Wessex Scene: “I think the poll 10. Bath Geography and Environmental allows us to judge the ability of 11. SOAS Studies, Modern Languages, Southampton: Officially great each university without being 12. Kings College Nursing and Paramedical Stud- solely based on academic results. London ies, and Social Work. (NSS) and the Higher Education teria (comparing students’ de- I was impressed we came ahead Top 20 ratings have been giv- Statistics Agency (HESA). gree results with entry qualifica- of Bristol and Durham.” 13. Southampton en to Physics, Philosophy, Medi- The tables cover seven main tions); and entry scores. Southampton’s other Higher cine and Art and Design. areas for comparison: teaching The Guardian said it had used Education institution, South- 113. Solent* For the first time, the Guardi- quality; feedback; spending per data from the NSS to get a sense ampton Solent University came an tables are based on data from student; student to staff ratio; of what students think of their 113th in the table out of a total *This is in no way gloating. the National Student Survey job prospects; ‘value added’ cri- experience at university. As a of 120. Student killed

Talented diver dies from serious head injuries after hit-and-run outside The Hobbit Jason O’Connell Inspector Roger Price said: A floral tribute has been laid “This is a particularly tragic inci- outside the Hobbit. A Solent University student was dent made worse by the fact that Meanwhile, two Southamp- killed in a hit-and-run incident the driver of the Astra drove off ton University students made a outside the Hobbit pub on Bev- leaving this man in the road.” grim discovery next to The Hob- ois Valley Road, Portswood. Gavin was a talented diver bit at 1am on Sunday, April 29. First-year criminology student who trained at the Southampton Harry Cosgrave and Harry Mac- Gavin Hustler-Brown, 22, from Diving Academy at the Quays. Donald were trying to get in Bradford, sustained serious head Earlier on the night he was killed through the rear entrance of the injuries after being hit by a blue he had been socialising with his pub to meet some friends when Vauxhall Astra in the early hours friend and colleague, Peter Wa- they stumbled across the corpse of Saturday, April 28. He died terfield, who won a silver medal of a white male in the adjacent later in Southampton General at the 2004 Olympic games in wooded area. They called the Hospital from his injuries. Athens. authorities who said the dead Police, who later found the Peter said: “It’s a big loss to man had probably died of a self- vehicle abandoned in Alma everyone. We loved him, he was induced drug overdose either Road, have arrested four people a good lad who would never earlier that day or the previous in connection with the incident. hurt anyone. evening. Two 20-year-old men, a 21- “He was the life and soul of Hampshire police confirmed year-old man and a 14-year-old the party and always the centre the deceased as 28 year-old girl, all from Southampton, were of attention. His life was about Thomas Parker, recently of Ply- arrested on suspicion of causing enjoying himself and he cer- mouth. The police said they death by dangerous driving and tainly did that. Everyone is dev- were awaiting the results of a bailed until June 27. astated.” Gavin Hustler-Brown studied criminology toxicology report. Local News

www.wessexscene.co.uk The Green and Good

Sucessful Environment and Ethics week followed by more charity campaigns on campus

Candy Snelling MONDAY: Despite the rain on Home and Garden day stu- The Environment and Ethics dents braved the Bungee Run week at the Students’ Union Recycling Game. brought together stalls from a TUESDAY: Wider Issues day range of external organisations had stalls from seven different and societies alongside themed Environmental and Ethical soci- SUSU events and a variety of ac- eties alongside groups such as tivities on the Union concourse. Greenpeace and October Books. Student awareness was truly A panel debate on the effective- tested with a themed quiz at ness of carbon offsetting and a the Bridge Bar on the Sunday 6 km fun run to raise money for Students clocked up 193 miles and over £200 night with all the questions be- tree aid was organised by the ing based on the week’s themes, Management Society. Thomas Gill-Dixon ly pleased with how many peo- population live on less than £1 including a ‘protest song’ music WEDNESDAY: Transport and ple turned up to take part – one a day such disasters have been round. Travel day saw free drinks to- On Friday May 11 Southamp- guy was just passing by and he catastrophic. Christian Aid is Every week day stalls and vol- kens for all those that cycled to ton University students had the ended up cycling with us for an working with partner organisa- unteers were on the concourse Union. Uni-Link promotions and chance to take part in a 165 hour and 20 minutes. The total tions in El Salvador and else- giving out information, advice a fully electric car were on the mile cycle ride across El Salva- distance achieved at the end of where to protect those most at and around two thousand free- concourse. dor, one of the poorest countries the day was 193 miles, well over risk from the effects of climate bies; the reusable canvas shop- THURSDAY: Building upon in Central America – without the 165 mile target, which is change and help them to pre- ping bags contained a variety of the success of the previous days, having to leave the comfort of fantastic.” Two members of the pare for what is to come. fair-trade chocolate and recycled SUSU hosted its fourth success- the University. Using exercise SUSU sabbatical team managed As Jema explains: “People at stationary, alongside the lovingly ful Farmers Market, which is bikes borrowed from the Jubilee to contribute five miles over the university were really gener- created SUSU Environmental & now a monthly fixture. Sports Centre and set up on the their lunch break. ous in how much they gave. That Ethical booklet. FRIDAY: A live music work- concourse outside the Students’ El Salvador was chosen as £200 could provide medical kits The week was headed up by shop outside the Union hosted Union Building, over 20 students a target distance to draw at- for more than 500 people made the ‘Environment and Ethics’ by ‘Drum4Fun’, Sumo Wrestling took part in the event which tention to Christian Aid’s new homeless by flooding, or build team consisting of Ella Hadley outside the West Refectory and raised over £200 for Christian climate change campaign, two wells in rural communities (Ethics Co-ordinator), Tom Con- ‘Flower Power Kinki’. Aid. which is highlighting the ef- in need of safe water to drink. It stable (Environment Co-ordina- SATURDAY: The week con- The event was organised by fects of climate change on poor really does make a difference to tor) and Candy Snelling (Envi- cluded with Environmental Rock Jonathan Dando, an honourary countries across the world. people’s lives and everyone who ronment and Ethics Officer). The on Saturday at The Hobbit. This life member of SUSU who now In El Salvador there has been a helped out deserves a massive two co-ordinating positions are annual event is a big hit with works at the University, and Jema marked increase in hurricanes, thank you.” currently vacant for next year, if students and residents alike, Davis, who is currently taking a floods and droughts over the Christian Aid is an internation- you are interested in getting in- combining live music acts with Gap Year working with Christian past decades which has been al development charity working volved or joining the committee environmental stalls and special Aid based at their Southampton linked to climate change, and with the poor in 50 countries re- e-mail [email protected] guest Chris Packham. office. Jema said: ‘We were real- in a country where 45% of the gardless of race or religion. Mark Farrin

While many students were try- ing to make an impact on the local elections on May 3, the University of Southampton Stu- dent Christian Movement (SCM) were going global, constructing a Freedom Wall on the Students’ Union concourse for the ‘Stop the Traffik’ campaign. People trafficking is the fast- est growing form of interna- tional crime, and an estimated 2.4 million people worldwide collected nearly 200 signatures hope that by doing something are being forced into labour. on the day which will shortly be a bit different like this, people The Stop the Traffik operation is added to the many collected by will remember the campaign a global coalition trying to raise the Stop the Traffik campaign and hopefully tell other people awareness of the situation and nationally and globally. about it.” petition governments into ac- Andy Treharne, SU SCM You can find out more at www. tion against it. Vice President, said: “The good stopthetraffik.org and SUCSM Situated on the concourse weather brought lots of people meet every Wednesday evening SCM asked people to sign the onto campus that day and we during term time starting at 7pm white wall with a hand print and really felt that we helped raise in The Chaplaincy, 41 University Drum4Fun - part of Environment and Ethics week activities sign the global declaration. They awareness of the issue… We Road. www.suscm.co.uk Local News

Page 4 Best bar none Student favourites scoop Le Tiss-hosted awards Pete Bryant

Southampton’s finest pubs, clubs and bars have been hand- ed awards at an Oscars-style ceremony. The ‘Best Bar None’ event took place in St. Mary’s stadium where the contenders found out who had been judged to be the safest and best run es- tablishments. Hosts Matt Le Tissier and Power FM DJ Lloydy, as well as over 400 guests, oversaw the re- sults of the awards. Winners in- cluded The Hobbit for Best Pub, Mono for Best Bar and Ikon/ Diva for Best Club. The Gordon Arms also scooped Best Local Pub and the Daily Echo Readers Award by a considerable margin, The Hobbit won the Best Pub award with Mono taking the overall winner’s title for the second year ton students. The Hobbit re- Computer Engineering student, running. ceived a lot of praise, being de- says: “It’s surprising the scheme Roy Danns, landlord of the scribed as “a good, well known hasn’t made more of an impact Gordon Arms, said: “It was good pub”, “not exclusively for stu- on where students tend to go.” to walk away with the awards in dents” and “cheap”(!). Mono’s Of the pubs and bars that the first year we have entered pizza and drinks deals appeared didn’t make the list of winners, the competition.” popular and the award for Ikon/ Orange Rooms stood out as a Manager Colin Pollard took Diva was also welcomed on the favourite among students as the award for the Hobbit and whole. well as the Stag’s Head for its said: “It was a well put together The winning pubs and bars relatively cheap prices. ceremony and it’s great to have will be hoping the ‘Best Bar It is hoped that the Best Bar all the hard work of the staff None’ scheme will have an ef- None scheme will raise stand- rewarded.” Colin was quick to fect on where students choose ards as licensees try to meet the praise the large number of stu- to drink, with John Martin, a criteria of the judges. The Hob- dents who visit the Hobbit add- second-year Maths student, ad- bit is a notable example of a pub ing: “Of course we value stu- mitting: “I would probably go which has changed a lot of pro- dents. The place wouldn’t be to the Gordon Arms now that it cedures as a result of the com- the same without them.” The has won these awards.” How- petition and others may follow awards have been greeted with ever not everyone is convinced, this example. mixed reactions by Southamp- as James Martin, a third-year We asked some students... Random Students: What do you think? “I rate pubs on things like pool tables”

“I think some need better music”

“I wouldn’t be judg- ing it on all the fire “We’re happy to hear “It’s surprising the safety and stuff” the Hobbit’s won, it’s scheme hasn’t made quite cheap” more of an impact on where students go” “Are you sure? I’m not” “I would probably go “Sobar was probably to the Gordon Arms my favourite” now that it has won these awards” National News

www.wessexscene.co.uk Best bar none Loan scroungers Criminals make off with up to £1.2 million in loans by enrolling at universities Alison Rowley student loans. ucation Minister Bill Rammell in- The problem stems from the sists that the seemingly lax regu- Criminals have obtained thou- Student Loans Company’s pre- lations were designed to “make sands of pounds in student loans vious acceptance of birth cer- it as straight-forward as possible by making bogus applications to tificates as singular proof of for genuine students to access universities across the country, a identity, despite warnings that the funds they need to pursue BBC investigation has found. the documents should not be their studies.” He maintains that UCAS, the organisation which used for this purpose. A theft the department will now be vigi- handles student applications for of 850 blank birth certificates lant in preventing and detecting almost every institution, has said from a Derbyshire register office fraud, and will vigorously pursue that as many as 1,500 cases of in 2005 has contributed signifi- those who try to defraud stu- application and enrolment fraud cantly to the industry, with the dents. have taken place in the last 12 Metropolitan Police reporting However, despite the enforce- months, with individual ‘ghost’ that 200 of the certificates have ment of such measures, some students being awarded loans of been circulated and used to universities continue to enrol up to £6,000. make fake applications. students directly in an effort to In London, one man was Sod university: spend your student loan on one of these The Student Loans Company speed up the lengthy applica- found to have created 17 fake Metropolitan University, even sentence for her involvement in refuses to reveal just how much tion procedure. This means by- identities and successfully en- though he had never attended a the scam. money made its way into the passing the anti-fraud computer rolled himself on five separate single lecture or taken an exam. “We are talking about a wrong hands as a result of this program used by UCAS and ef- degree courses at a single uni- He continued to reside at his Da- criminal industry, a large scale crime, but the figure is estimated fectively fuelling the illegal ghost versity, accumulating loans genham council flat, but spent criminal industry”, said Paul to be up to £1.2 million. application business. worth £65,595. some of the money on a top-of- Taylor, lead investigator of Luton The Department for Educa- Southampton University said Adeleke Adebayo, 32, man- the-range BMW. In March, he council, where one operation in tion and Skills recently ruled that it was unable to comment at aged to enrol as a first-year was sentenced to four years in the area led to a raid on eight in light of such cases, applicants this point in time in response to student and also as a returning prison along with his girlfriend addresses, exposing a gang at- must now provide details of questions as to whether such in- second-year student at London who will serve an 18-month tempting to obtain £100,000 in character witnesses. Higher Ed- cidents have occurred here. Crammed in The student-staff ratio is worsening at universities across the UK Ashleigh Toll particularly Germany and Japan, and the ratio of students and UK universities are continuing staff actually rose this year.” to ‘cram in’ more students even She continued: “We cannot though staffing levels are falling keep cramming more students short, according to information into our universities and expect released by the University and the staff to put in even more un- College Union (UCU). paid overtime.” Recent statistics compiled by The recent complaints ex- the Higher Education Statistics pressed by academics have also Agency suggest that there were been supported by the National 16.8 students per teacher in Union of Students (NUS). 2005-06, compared to 16.1 in President Gemma Tumelty the previous year. Figures from said: “That we lag behind Eu- 2003-04 indicate that the stu- rope and other parts of the world dent-staff ratio in universities in terms of our GDP spending was 18:1, indicating a marked on Higher Education, and hence improvement over the last cou- Students are being crammed in like sardines our investment in teaching, is ple of years. Co-Operation and Development the international averages. able that the UK, the fourth simply not good enough. However, the UCU believes (OECD), which showed 15.5 They suggest that proportion- largest economy in the world, is “Staffing levels have clearly that this decrease is because students for each staff member. ately more staff are being re- falling behind competitors when not kept pace with increased part-time staff are now being A joint statement from Uni- cruited than students, although it comes to the number of stu- participation in higher educa- included in the calculations. It versities UK and the Universities it has been proposed that more dents to each member of teach- tion, but particularly as students has also been acknowledged and Colleges Employers Associa- government funding is essen- ing staff at our universities. are paying more for the privilege that the UK ratio is above the in- tion said that there were signifi- tial. “Despite a recent recalcula- of higher education, their right ternational average recorded by cant variations in definitions and UCU joint general secretary tion of figures the UK is still way to quality teaching must be pro- the Organisation for Economic methodologies when calculating Sally Hunt said: “It is unaccept- behind competitor countries, moted and not depleted.” University Al Gore appointed new The new sports strip - Are RAG and the Sport: University’s Olympic SUSU Elections: Check out pg7-9 walksaway Pigs, protests and plant Sport: AU Ball, Tour photos SUSU AGM & Local with all the Uni-Link boss AU protecting their members? Bid rings success candidates manifesto inside! and Varsity humiliation Elections - VOTE! cups!!! pots: News in Brief, page 3 wessex wessex wessex wessex 1st December 2006 Priceless 20th October 2006 Priceless 20th October 2006 Priceless 27th April 2007 Priceless News SCENE News SCENE SCENE News SCENE News Student Death, re, God Watch out University Comment and Surge- all for conmen, REDUCED TO BOLDERS coated in arms attendance monitored but the university jackpots and trade & Kaplan mental patients local and the jukebox AND WOOD? going to plan on the loose national news Scene 2 Features Politics Political fallout: Post-valentines Features Facebook and Happiness, Jim Radiation in and library life it’s big bother, Saville Russia, mid- feature specials the new big and a terms in the US brother? roots Music manoeuvre Music Music Lifestyle The Edge takes The Knives are Common, food, a look at the out for review Jamie T has a superfood and best albums of cuppa with a taste of the 2006 The Edge, & real Spain Page 6 Awards special Film Film Start of the end for current Boldrewood campus as new plans launched Film Ashleigh Toll of ‘Bolditz’ reinforces the image seek other forms of transport in Chancellor, Professor Adam Music

A Athlet of the Boldrewood building ex- order to reduce the impact on Wheeler said : ‘The redevelop- lcoh icism Casino Royale olism and : the Co The Devil wears truth? uld yo u Get int fill thi o the s space? wessex Scene 18th M ay 20 06 Ne w Pricele The University has released terior as outdated and dull, with the environment. ment of the Boldrewood campus s ss A st ark wa from rning SCENE Diamonds, th e top of SUSU The Next PM? Interview Wessex Sport: The Saints Razorlight talk, Fe ature details of its campus redevelop- the interior effectively at the end It is expected that the pro- and relocation of the Schools of s pays Going out with a bang - The Sou Wessex Sport: It’s all down hill t Wessex Sport: Solent’s stagnation ha SUSU Elections Results Special: mpto Wessex Sport: South Varsity Prada, but what Conste n’s rna a tion Believe! New Wessex Could you ll this space? s Fr eshe Athleticism and org r sex y ca ncelled Music ment scheme. of its life. The site requires major gramme will be completed Medicine and Biological Scienc- All the best of the su mmer Happyness and fe stivals with John McDonnell Film season slips slightly As reported in the Wessex investment to restore it to a sus- by 2010, however with Bold- es to world-class, purpose-built Panic! at The Supe out rma last issue of 2006/2007! n from here for University Skiers could mean the end of the Vixens See pages 2, 6-9, 12, 16-17 and 31 R University rebranding may spell the end for much maligned mammal etur action & more BUSA glory about ns, but it is too late Scene section launched Get into the Scene for Wo Alcoholism: the truth? rld Tra Ce de ntre? A S O B E R I N G T New stu dy fea Scene last year, the £236 mil- tainable condition, making it less rewood’s lecture theatres closing facilities on Highfield will in- rs T Garet op U h Hyne p Fe Christoph s es wi A er D of t h ll e shleig ean e con nd th HOUGH h Tol Up trovers e i Th l Fees. B ial n e nfamo is wee uni rough w Top us Beerfest reviews we k se versiti t in to Gro ‘s set in stone commandments, and e tol and Warwick. e A presentation to University lcome s Sou in s with provid up of tude its la thamp flux of a lon e tie the t nt dents h test co ton cash, g over s in th op 1 9 life T ere t hort o the ne these due e UK, unive sty last o repl f stu- w und fees wi ampto of w rsi- le’ year t ace th up t ergrad ll see n Univ hich S will be wo o grad ose los o £30 uates alrea ersity outh- the c rld o uation t fee 00 per payin dy pu is a me cialis arefree f wo r a nd t s, comp year g cap shing mbe ing, lo days new in k. H o he o ared in tuit to b for th r, tin ng li of so Season of goodwill with RAG, Stop Aids and STAR t we f wi io e e g e- - Christopher Dean a e ke’s u ver, t £125 th a ma n loo lifted, £3000 classe ins an nce wi nivers his t 0 pre ximu ks set unive har s, to b d c ut Edge: new t - ll likel ity ex hese fe viously m Re o cha rsity l d wor e repl to th y be v peri- es wil . Tho searc nge i r ife T k and aced b e exp ery dif the c l be pa ugh h cond revoca hough part- y den erience ferent omple id foll versity ucted bly. this ma time jo evitably cause some disruption. o at the end of this academic year, t of an anomaly to the University t c lion Capital Development Pro- w s the s of rat ion wing of S by th al r y ap bs. ww.b y are the s her th of the ge outham e Uni esiden pease S amuk Th to re tu- an u co sted pto - sh ts (s of l tudent .com is yea place mea p-fro urse, that n has ut d ee “S o- Media r wil . n stu nt, lish camp sug- own” hut 084 Buyer l be t dent they uni us li to pag up o 5 1300 s he fi vers s co will versi fe in be s e 2) r 667 rst ye ity w uld lea mirr ties wi Eng- een wh , it re ar or ith de ve un or tha ll like T at st mains The more bts of i- Ze t of Au ly soo his is udents . A £3 alan stra n an i fee nd wi 0,000 d, wh lia and Wesse ssue to l. th the alrea ere tu New x Scen whic There was found to be an are not individually special, it is officials by the branding agency Rus dy ro ition the e wi h the sell ughly fees a cours ll r etu As in £5000 re te e of t rn ov these . rmine h he yea er coun ow y r, to tries, of Sou ou, th de- gone thamp e s tud faring ton Un ents Pete Bryant w u iv w nder t ersity, w.w his new are essexs system. cene.co gramme will transform the Bold- and to instead reflect the inno- many students are concerned The University will aim to keep Students.uk seeking safety Ashleigh Toll red to Red Kinki at the Cube, or of Southampton STAR recently 17 November. A diary entry writ- editors Precedent showed the dolphin “imbalance of perceptions” felt that as a combination they rewood site into the UK’s first vative, world class research that about the disruption that will be this disruption to a minimum for Queen? Kat Slowe by simply pausing to think of the spending a week raising aware- ten on the night by STAR Presi- Southampton University’s dol- to be one of the most modern between how the University is will provide a different identity Against backdrop of attacks, initiatives place security and survival on top of the agenda 40 million people worldwide liv- ness for the cause of destitute dent Chris Hearle said: “While wholly integrated ‘professional occurs within its walls. caused to their timetables. From students and staff. As our plans needed phin logo may be killed off as logos of all the Russell Group viewed internally and external- in the marketplace, particularly Southampton University Stop ing with HIV/AIDS. asylum seekers living on the sleeping rough I felt like a living campus’, comprising the School Another important factor of next year, medical students will for these exciting development part of a larger re-branding institutions, as opposed to the ly. Precedent presented seven emphasising Southampton’s AIDS Society, a small group of Money raised from the bal- streets in the UK. The group re- ghost - ignored and without a of Management and a building the rebuilding programme is to have more lectures at South- evolve, we will work closely process to improve the image of heraldic, traditional logos of the statements which they believe strengths in interdisciplinarity Christopher Dean Several other assaults have anonymous, told the Wessex there is evidently a great risk in- members who actively campaign loon sponsorship will go to the jected home comforts to sleep voice. All I could do was watch to accommodate the marine make certain that the changes ampton General Hospital, a with SUSU and the two Schools Film been reported in the area since Scene: “I know it is dangerous volved in using them. The bus the University. likes of Cambridge, Sheffield and will bring a greater focus on the and as a force for social good. Ashleigh Toll for global access to AIDS treat- Student Partnership Worldwide on the floors of willing friends, from ground level at everyone services of London-based com- maintain the environmental prospect that has been met with to ensure that students continue There are concerns that the Glasgow. It was even considered University’s strengths and defin- At the very least, it looks like Editorial Team the start of term, almost all car- to walk home alone but some- costs £1 and will take students ment, will be raising awareness who co-ordinate the national and were allowed to carry a bag walking above me who seemed pany, Lloyd’s Register. The res- sustainability of the University. reservation by many. A second- to have a positive experience of 300 reviews Emma Lenanton ried out by gangs of teenage times therewessex is no choice. I fully directly to their front door. dolphin looks “too modern”, to be more modern-looking than ing characteristics. we will be seeing less of the wessex of the disease by releasing 1000 Student Stop AIDS Campaign,wessex filled with clothing necessities so superior.” toration of the site will allow for Factors suchwessex as improving en- year medical student comment- university life.” and that as a result many willwessex most of the post 1992 ‘New A large part of the consulta- dolphin. Although paternal and 10th November 2006 Priceless youths. intend to purchase a rape alarm Toby Kushner, Vice President red balloons on 1 December to and more locally, the19th Ribbons January only. 2007 They alsoPriceless had to give up The total money raised closer engagement with busi- ergy efficiency9th March will 2007 be consid Priceless- ed: “Rumours have been going University officials are in- 18th May 2007 Worth it’s weight in paper 30th September 2006 Priceless A number of violent attacks Burgess Road has also and I think this is something that Welfare & Societies, told stu- confuse Southampton with the University’ logos. Precedent tion process was trying to es- powerful, the omnipresent na- SCENEmark World AIDS Day. Stop AIDS Centre: a drop-in centre in their mobile phones, and were throughout the week was ness and professional organisa- ered, along with ensuring that round for a while, my major con- sisting however that students less academically established said that as a university we were tablish the unique aspects of a ture of the logo was criticised for against students have once emerged as a prime target for all News girls in the Portswood area dents: “Never walk home alone News SCENEDon’t forget to SCENE SCENE News SCENE is encouraging students to get Southampton for the 300 peo- not allowed to pay for their own £564, which will be given to tions, and will generate greater the constructionNews meets the lat- cern living in Portswood is that a do not need to panic. The con- News post 1992 ‘New Universities’. “punching below our weight”, Southampton ‘experience’ that representing an overwhelming again struck Southampton. muggings and particularly vio- require.” at night; even if you only live involved with the campaign on ple living with HIV in the area. food or transport. the Southampton and Winches- Vote! employment prospects for the est standards of environmental lot of the buses to the SGH are struction of the new EEE build- In the Portswood area recent- lent assaults, as students make MoreStudents have fees, been urgedless to two minutes from the Library or Controversy in Starts 26th Feb The logo is also said to be too and questioned whether the dol- the University could market to stamp of ownership, due to its A stark warning Highfield Campus, by sponsor- Student campaign groups The week culminated with ter Visitors Group to fund ‘fes- city. efficiency.Money University matters: officials already packed, I don’t want to ing on University SUSU RoadSUSU has ELECELECTIONSTIONS overbearing, exerting too Recognition rigid phin had the impact for or power of potential students and outside inescapable presence through- ly one girl was almost raped but their way back to Wessex Lane use the safety bus. Even though Jesters, go with a friend, you’re ing a balloon in the balloon race, have had a regular presence on group members enduring a cold tive boxes’, containing essential The campus is currently in a are also hopeful that staff and be missing any lectures.” recently been completed and managed to escape by kicking halls late at night. Portswoodcoursework, Road and Burgess no The Cube and Late night library love an authority over all aspects of the logos of some of our Russell parties. out every level of university life. from poor state; the affectionate tag students using the new site will The University’s Deputy Vice ...continues on page 2 signing an action card, wearing campus of late, with members night outside the Cube on Friday ... continues page 2 Balls, buses, VOTE University life. UniversityGroup competitors and such as Bris- While they will not become (continues on page 2...) her attacker and running away. One girl, who wishes to remain Road are well-lit main roads, continues on page 2... public the council - Sex scandal amongst a series to incidents to threatenwww.bamuk.com extended opening the top www.bamuk.com pay rises and www.bamuk.com bars, but tragic www.bamuk.com Student Media Buyers Student Media Buyers www.wessexscene.co.uk Student Media Buyers www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 Student Media Buyers services? 0845 1300 667 but peace on Christopher Dean 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk of SUSU 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk privatisation student death The aftermath of two students the streets having sex in the toilets topped Features Features Politics the list of disturbances that have blighted the Hartley Library’s Features Southampton’s Home guide Alan Johnson late night opening hours. Features The remnants of the romping Top 10 places Consternation to protesting MP pair’s activity was discovered not Is Lent spent? long after the event in a routine to be Scene2... as Fresher sex and pro-animal speaks security check by Library staff, Going ape and but having fled from the scene dumbness orgy cancelled testing the couple could not be held why it’s great to accountable for the explicit ac- and tions. be a girl Music Music One explanation for this be- Moore Music haviour might be that the stu- New Young dents were trying to warm up, Lifestyle Lifestyle All the best of The Edge looks as the Library is too cold; a com- Pony Club - plaint about the temperature Newest section Exam tips & the summer back at the was raised at Union Council, and take The Edge a Facebook group, ‘Hartley Li- on hillwalking, a tour round Joiners 40 year brary is TOO BLOODY COLD!’, festivals The statues avert their eyes from the Hartley hotbed for a ride has gained over 30 members in Cutbacks leave sculpture students in a Winchester of discontent legacy gardens and a the unseen Editor-in-Chief Phil Webb the last week. tles. the end of the exams… We ask phones must be switched to off Christine Couldwell been jeopardised.” School has admitted this, insti- they are doing all they can to im- Film The news of this promiscu- Briony Thomson, Reception that students support this initia- or silent. pub lunch Southampton WSA has seen a significant gating a series of open forums prove the situation at Winches- ous activity comes as a national and Learning Centre Manager tive by not abusing the Library Although we understand that Dramatic changes in the run- change of style in its running for students to voice their opin- ter. We will keep working with Film Borat: You Film survey by Hotxt.co.uk revealed at the Hartley Library, told the or breaching the rules.” how stressful the exam period ning of Winchester School of Art following the arrival two years ions. them to ensure the best possible that people from Southampton Wessex Scene: “We do not al- To support students during can be for students, the Wessex have resulted in no requirement ago of a new Head of School Dan Hemsley, WSA Stu- deal for everyone up there.” like? Sick of libraries? are the biggest text flirts in the low food and drink into the Li- the forthcoming exam period, Scene does not recommend hav- Music Music for a foundation year, grossly di- who, in a recent student dents’ Union President, told the “While the changes may not Superman country. brary because it damages valu- the Hartley Library will be open ing sex in the Library as an effec- minished lecturer hours, smaller meeting, indicated the neces- Wessex Scene: “I think it’s no- have pleased everyone and will [email protected] Returns, but is Try a Night at Concerns have been raised able resources, and distracts until 2am every day from the tive means of relaxation. This time it’s A song & dance studio spaces and a general air sity of increasing the number ticeable now that the problems take some time to adjust to, the about late night behaviour in from study... There was also an evening of Monday January 15 of student discontent, culminat- of students at the School in have arisen from a lack of cor- situation we are in now is far the Museum the Library, with instances of incident [during the last exam until the morning of Friday Feb- For more on the Library sex Mr. Hudson in ing in the lodging of a formal order to prevent closure. rect communication with the better than the alternative - clos- it too late for drunken students wandering in period] whereby some of the ruary 2. Normal Library rules ap- scandal, including the reaction for Europe, The complaint by third-year Sculp- However, a higher intake students. The changes haven’t ing of Winchester School of Art, Outrage as Soton environmental researchers fly to the US by private jet and causing noise and nuisance, sinks were blocked and the taps ply during the extended opening, of the SUSU Sabbatical team, the Library and ture students. has resulted in the school’s been apparent enough and which was a very real possibility World Trade and an abundance of left over left running, which we put down including no food, drink (other see Comment on page 6. Edge’s summer Although all students have once highly-valued reputa- that’s led to rumour and specu- if the status quo was maintained A SOBERING THOUGHT Sciences at Southampton’s Na- their excuse was “Homer Simp- pressures and workloads of the Christopher Dean food packaging and drinks bot- to ‘high jinks’ as it was towards than water) or smoking. Mobile been affected, Sculpture stu- tion fast diminishing amid lation.” up there.” New study fears Top Up Fees will end the infamous ‘student lifestyle’ tional Oceanography Centre, son-like in its banality.” personnel involved it would not an interview Centre? guide dents have been especially ag- these cutbacks. The new en- SUSU President Ben Rogers Head of School Bashir Ma- Senior figures conducting re- and the University Vice-Chan- The University responded this have been possible to make the grieved, suffering an 85% re- trants are no less talented but said: “The Students’ Union is khoul was unavailable for com- of the controversial new Top Group of the top 19 universi- will be the carefree days of so- search at Southampton Univer- cellor, Professor Bill Wakeham, week with Bill Wakeham telling trip any other way without a de- with Mumm-ra Gareth Hynes duction in visiting lecturer hours now lack the foundation ex- very concerned about the issues ment as he has been abroad for Up Fees. Brought in to provide ties in the UK, of which South- cialising, long lie-ins and cut- sity into the effects of climate made the trip in order to estab- the Wessex Scene: “To be sure lay of several months. This rep- Christopher Dean from 82 days just two years ago perience. raised from students at Winches- the past few days. universities with a long overdue ampton University is a member, ting classes, to be replaced by change and the environment lish an exchange programme for that a collaboration with UNCW resents a great opportunity for Film Film Ashleigh Toll to 12 days this year, equating to Much anger has been di- ter School of Art, and we have The aim of the complaint is to influx of cash, these fees will see already pushing for the £3000 hard work and part-time jobs. have come in for criticism after students of Earth Sciences with would be in the best interests our students. 30 minutes per student for the rected towards the new Head been working with the Head either achieve the reinstatement This week sees Southampton the new undergraduates paying cap to be lifted, university life Though this may appease of lo- they flew to the US recently by the University of North Carolina. of our students and research- “I believe the University 28 Oscars 2007 entire academic year. of School with the appear- of School and senior University of the previous number of visit- welcome its latest cohort of stu- up to £3000 per year in tuition looks set to change irrevocably. cal residents (see “Shut up or private jet. Their justification for the use of ers, I felt it was important that should be judged across the Piers Candy, a third-year ance of rebellious graffiti in management to ensure that the ing lecturer hours or, at worst, Leader dents here to replace those lost fees, compared with a maximum Research conducted by the Uni- shut down” page 2), it remains As a result, far more carbon the private jet was that it would key University personnel vis- board on its environmental cre- review, the weeks Christopher Dean receive a refund in tuition fees. sculpture student, said: “It is un- the corridors resulting in a changes are being communicat- last year to graduation and the of £1250 previously. Though versity of Southampton has sug- to be seen what students feel. per person was emitted into the minimise disruption to teaching ited UNCW together to meet in dentials and not on one decision. fortunate that it has hit us in the security presence at his Win- ed to the students and that As a compromise, sculpture stu- world of work. However, this these fees will be paid following gested that campus life in Eng- This is an issue to which the atmosphere than would have timetables. person with their counterparts We are making huge efforts to later, rising of If you want Moore: year of our degree show when, chester Gallery private view. these issues are being ad- dents have been given six more new intake’s university experi- the completion of the course, lish universities will likely soon Wessex Scene will return over been the case had they taken a This, however, did not con- there and to view at first hand reduce our carbon footprint and without the benefit of adequate Students have expressed dressed.” days of visiting lecturer hours ence will likely be very different rather than up-front, they will mirror that of Australia and New the course of the year, to de- commercial flight. vince Jeff Gazzard, of the Avia- UNCW’s facilities and research consider carefully the need for Spiderman 3 Hannibal & Full elections review and direction from internal lecturers concern at the lack of com- “The reaction from the Uni- but students still feel that more to the experiences of the stu- mean students could leave uni- Zealand, where tuition fees are termine how you, the students Dr Andrew Roberts, head of tion Environment Federation, programmes. all transport use by staff.” and external practising artists, I munication about the new versity has been very positive should be done. The complaint dents they are to replace. versity with debts of £30,000 already roughly £5000. of Southampton University, are the School of Ocean and Earth who told BBC South Today that “Given the conflicting time ...continues page 2 Bobby results breakdown overleaf crawls out [email protected] This year will be the first year or more. And with the Russell As in these countries, gone faring under this new system. feel that our progress will have developments. The Head of and the Union is confident that will continue to be pursued. www.bamuk.com www.bamuk.com Student Media Buyers www.bamuk.com www.bamuk.com www.bamuk.com www.wessexscene.co.uk Student Media Buyers Student Media Buyers Student Media Buyers Student Media Buyers 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 www.wessexscene.co.uk 0845 1300 667 News Ashleigh ‘Charging’ Toll news Jason Old’Connell @wessexscene.co.uk Politics Jack Paxman-Haines Too late to Comment? [email protected] It is the nature of newspapers to looking to re-brand its image in Guardian University Guide (see improve the situation. Science Tanya Howes deal in the here and now, and order that the first-class research page 2), as well as our place in It is crucial for the continuing [email protected] with good reason; often, how- and teaching here achieves the the top 200 universities world- enhancement of this University’s ever, it is important to take stock recognition it undoubtedly de- wide according to The Times, reputation that we enable what Arts Kat Slowe of the bigger picture. I would serves. Similarly, the redevelop- serves to underlines the strides is clearly one of the leading art [email protected] like to take some time, then, to ment of Boldrewood and the the institution is making. schools in the country to con- look back over the last year of plans for the first fully inte- At the same time, there is still tinue to flourish. Fashion Lorna Longworth Southampton University-based grated professional campus in work to be done… for one thing, As an aside, I have been [email protected] news, and to assess the impact the UK shows Southampton to they really need to cut down on struck and humbled by the events have had on us ordinary be a leading player in the field. all that sex in the library ;) many charitable contributions Features Enjoli Liston students. The attempt to get involved in We Southampton-based stu- that have been made by South- features Mike Anderson Certainly, the University’s the London 2012 Olympics by dents don’t hear a lot about go- ampton students this year. The @wessexscene.co.uk reputation and standing, both in hosting training camps for inter- ings-on at Winchester School amount of time and effort put this country and internationally, national teams further raises our of Art, so it is good that we are in has been absolutely stagger- Lifestyle Kylie MacLellan is on the up. As has consistently profile and stature, and empha- bringing you coverage of such ing, and is evidence that the bad Natasha Harding been stated in these pages, this sises the quality of the facilities, happenings on this edition’s reputation that students are of- can only have good repercus- sporting and otherwise, avail- front page. The nature of the ten labelled with could not be Sport Simon ‘Hercules’ Webb sions for us, for as the Universi- able to Southampton University story, however, is deeply worry- further from the truth. [email protected] ty’s stock rises, so does the value students. ing. Luckily, it seems as though Thanks for reading and please of our degrees. Southampton is Our position in the recent the University is now striving to continue to do so next year. We need... Thanks, we were... The Wessex Scene needs: a holiday, fancy coming? Christopher Tanya Kat Email the editor to get involved. Dean Howes Slowe Wessex Scene Highfield Editor

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www.wessexscene.co.uk Editor’s Column The NUS World Order Is it time for SUSU to rejoin the NUS?

Well kiddies, it sure has been Jack Haines tacted, argued that it was un- with both opposed to re-affilia- With such a response the fun. But that’s it. This is the final dergoing serious reform and tion, at least at the current time, prospect of re-affiliation seems Politics section of the year. Fit- With rumours regarding an at- now had far more independent I talked to a potential leader very far away. What is certain is tingly it goes with a bang, a re- tempt to re-affiliate with the officers which could help put an of the pro-NUS faction, Peter that over the next few months port on the plot to bring us back NUS being whispered in dark end to the image of the NUS as Lamb, Chairman of Union Coun- the distribution of information into the NUS, a meeting with corners all over Southampton, I a divided force. Southampton cil. Lamb believes that as SUSU about Southampton’s position Gordon Brown, an interview set out to get to the bottom of would be welcome to rejoin. is not within the NUS we cannot would not go amiss. If the stu- with Harriet Harman (to whom the argument. In order to understand the truly understand what the NUS dents are to decide either way we are extremely grateful) and a Deciding to start at the top, mood of SUSU when we disaf- does, and so believe they will do they must be informed. The bat- report on the French election. I talked to current President Ben filiated I talked to former Presi- nothing. He said that he simply tle lines over affiliation are al- I’d like to thank everybody Rogers about what place South- dent Andy Wilson. For Wilson, wished to see a debate on the ready being drawn up. who has contributed pieces this ampton might take within the SUSU’s leaving has aided both matter and for the students to In this debate it would be fit- year; it has been a true pleasure NUS if we were to re-affiliate. Southampton and the NUS: by make up their own minds. ting to close with the remarks being your editor. To those who Rogers argued though that if coming out we stopped paying This brought up an interest- of Benedict Pringle. Pringle, as didn’t contribute, but are still time was spent communicating the fee, which we could spend ing point; all the sources I had a member of the NUS’ ‘block of reading this, I am also extremely through the Aldwych Group, it on other student resources such discussed the matter with were 12’ and VP Education for Not- grateful - you have made an could become a force to rival as the Students’ Union - this, of either graduates or third-years. tingham University, is used to old Politics editor feel loved. Fi- the NUS but without the pay- course, was a bonus for South- With this in mind I took the mat- balancing Union issues. While I nally, if you have any pieces or ment of £40,000 in Union dues ampton. ter to first-year students, who of was discussing the matter with ideas send them as always to the per year. This would be of fur- Despite some other Unions course would be the most affect- him he told me that the decision email below; I will do my best to ther benefit, argues Rogers, as seeing SUSU as leeching off the ed if re-affiliation were to take has to come from within, and reply before they take away my the Aldwych Group offers more success of the NUS, by leaving, place over the next few years. that while in his opinion the NUS editing powers. specific aid for the needs of Rus- SUSU and other Unions have 60% of those I questioned were was the natural home for South- sell Group Universities and more prompted reform within the strongly against any re-affilia- ampton it was down to the stu- politics representation for its individual NUS in an attempt to gain these tion while a further 20% did not dents to decide either way. The @wessexscene.co.uk members. The NUS, when con- members back. know we were not members. debate is set to run and run. For Wilson, to begin to re-af- filiate next year might be prema- ture, but to leave it four or five years could lead to Southamp- ton losing any political capital we have at the moment - tim- ing, then, would be essential if any re-affiliation campaign was launched. Wilson urged caution though: if Southampton was to re-affili- ate, it would join at the bottom of the Union, and would have to prove itself before given any real internal responsibility. Even then, the much-anticipated re- form that the NUS pressed for at this year’s conference would be ongoing rather than immediate. Rogers also places a high value on the reform voted for at the NUS Conference. Indeed, though he is against the NUS as it stands he is not completely against the possibility of re-affili- ation, arguing that if it were to happen it would be best to wait until after the NUS Conference before discussing it so that the effects of the reform promised could be monitored. However, he pointed out that in his opin- ion, considering SUSU’s strength as an independent union there is simply no point to re-affiliation. Having discussed the mat- ter with Rogers and Wilson and Politics

Page 8 The French Revolution A Royal victory for Sarkozy in the French Presidential elections Alistair Brockbanks the removal of taxes from in- cially after years of inaction by has an equal number of men and tions with measures such as live come earned for working more President Chirac. However, the women, a revolutionary step in a TV debates. Ultimately though, On May 6 Nicolas Sarkozy of than the 35 hour week. Given gap between Sarkozy’s policies country that has few women in perhaps a truly competitive race the centre-right UMP party was France’s traditional hostility to and de facto progress depend government. is all that is needed. convincingly elected the next such ‘neo-liberal’ reforms, for on the impending parliamentary Moreover, Sarkozy’s victory If the French people are truly President of France, ending one Sarkozy to pass them would be elections. The legislative elec- leaves the Socialist party once passionate about modernising of the most engaging electoral a truly historic achievement and tions are just over a month away again counting its losses. Sé- their country then on June 10 contests in recent memory. Sar- would, arguably, push France and the UMP must return a ma- golène Royal’s campaign, while they must reward their new Pres- kozy has promised a range of forward economically. jority to the French parliament bounding in flair and charisma, ident with a parliament equally radical reforms aimed at moder- Sarkozy’s other, more centre- if Sarkozy is going to write his ultimately failed to convince as eager for reform. Otherwise, nising France and he undoubt- right, policies include minimum new page in history. Should the the French people that she was one of the most important na- edly has a strong mandate from sentences for repeat offenders, French people express ambiva- serious enough to govern their tion states in Europe may find the French people; however, selling 40,000 council homes to lence and elect a Socialist gov- country. In the end she lost be- itself stuck in the past and leave whether we see a true revolu- tenants and obliging immigrants ernment, then Sarkozy will face cause policy won over personal- Sarkozy a ‘promise unfulfilled’. tion will depend on events in the to speak and read French. On years of stalemate and see his ity. near future. the international front Sarkozy modernising dream in tatters. The excitement of this Presi- On his victory Sarkozy de- has declared that Turkey should Sarkozy is certainly a polaris- dential election was not lost on clared to his supporters: “To- be permanently excluded from ing figure and he is not without the French people; a record 85% Alistair Brockbanks gether we are going to write a joining the European Union and his critics; indeed, small scale ri- of voters turned out to express new page in history”, and his that France should be more ami- ots broke out in several cities on their choice in the ‘Sego-Sarko’ proposed reforms confirm this cable with the United States. the announcement of his victo- race. In the last UK general elec- presents ‘Crosscur- statement. Sarkozy has promised Most of these reforms, if en- ry, with torching cars being the tion less than 62% of those immediate tax cuts of around acted, would bring an era of most popular activity. However, eligible actually voted, and as rent’ (Thursdays 12-2) £10 billion, the near total abo- modernity to the French Repub- Sarkozy has won admiration in such we can only be envious lition of inheritance tax, radical lic that it needs and has cried many circles for proposing that of such a high turnout. Perhaps industrial labour reforms and out for since the 1980s, espe- his new slimmed-down cabinet we need to spice up our elec- only on Surge Anything the French can do... This year’s real election story is only just starting to heat up Peter Lamb The event was held at the the camera. He approached our With around 80% of the La- MPs debate whether or not it Imagination Gallery in London, little group, shaking each one of bour Party expected to vote for matters, given that the support It was an intrepid band who se- a building whose architecture us by the hand, asking where Brown, he has chosen to take a Jack Straw is offering Gordon cured SUSU’s place in history one screamed out that this was 21st we were from, and what we felt line which focuses on what he Brown makes it likely that he will sunny Friday morning: we had century Britain and with a name the big issues were in our area. is offering the country, not just become the next Deputy Prime been invited to attend the an- no doubt carefully selected to Star struck, someone managed the party; he is running with Minister. nouncement of Gordon Brown’s hint at the high aspirations that to bleat something about the the slogan ‘Gordon Brown for Southampton students have intention to run for the leader- Mr Brown is setting. Once inside environment, an issue we heard Britain’ and not ‘Gordon Brown had a chance to meet a number ship of the Labour Party. There we were among a strange mix- Mr Brown concentrate heavily for Labour’. But Brown has not of the candidates in the com- had been great speculation as to ture of MPs, senior Labour Party on when he visited Southamp- won yet, he still faces competi- petition, with visits from John the date when Mr Brown would activists and fellow students, and ton a few days later. Eventually tion from left-winger John Mc- McDonnell, Alan Johnson, Peter launch his campaign, with some within minutes we were talk- the meeting and greeting came Donnell. In order to go through Hain and Harriet Harman organ- people having been waiting ing to Jack Straw and Mrs Sarah to an end and we all moved into to the vote each candidate re- ised by the Labour Club. since 1994, but now the time Brown, who seemed surprisingly the room where the announce- quires the backing of 44 MPs; Regardless of the importance had finally come. interested with what we consid- ment was to be made. at the moment McDonnell is at- of this year’s local elections, this Just a day before, Tony Blair ered to be our mundane lives. Everyone expected a few new tempting to reach that figure by is the election which really mat- had given a farewell speech to The building was filled to capac- ideas to come up in his speech, pooling his support with that of ters this year since it may deter- his Constituency Labour Party in ity; one organiser informed me but the quantity and quality of Michael Meacher, another left- mine the nature and composition Sedgefield, an event many had that it took less than two hours those he put forward startled winger who was intending to of the country’s government for waited almost as long for, set- of contacting people before everyone. From well-known is- run but who has stood aside in years to come. When Labour ting a date of June 27 for leav- there were no more spaces left. sues such as housing shortages, order to maximise the chances MPs, Labour Party members and ing Downing Street as Prime This was an event no one want- to new and original ideas; more of a candidate from the Left get- members of associated trade Minister for the last time. Like ed to miss. power for Parliament to decide ting on the ballot. unions vote for the next leader him or loathe him, Tony Blair is Suddenly the room erupted on issues of war and the possi- In addition to the leader- of the Labour Party, they aren’t leaving some big shoes to fill and into applause; there was the bility of bringing talented mem- ship, the deputy leadership of just deciding upon the future Brown’s announcement in every man himself, beaming a smile bers of other parties into the the party is up for election. This of the Party, but the future of way sent out the message that and revealing a confidence and Cabinet, whatever was best for competition looks to be a lot our nation. Let’s just hope they he was the man to fill them. energy that is rarely picked up by the country. closer, although many Labour make the right choice. Politics

www.wessexscene.co.uk The Challenge Ahead An interview with Labour Party Deputy Leadership contender Harriet Harman Labour Party Deputy Lead- and that it should be chosen over 20 years, from when he well. We’re all colleagues in a I think we just have to get ership contender harriet by the party as well - so I was Parliamentary candidate team. But like I said, it’s not across the basic arguments. Harman recently paid a visit think it would work out quite in Putney and completely like there’s a huge ideologi- What’s important for stu- to Southampton. well if the Deputy Leader was built up the party there from cal divide like there was with dents is the argument about Chair of the party as well, but nothing. He’s an absolute- the Benn-Healy leadership/ equality; students are very Jack Haines reports. it doesn’t have to be like that. ly doughty campaigner, if deputy leadership contest in opposed to inequality and Labour is certainly the par- Why are you running? ty that stands for equality. Equality for women, equal- Because I want Labour to ity on grounds of sexual ori- stay in government, to have a entation and race. So I think fourth term. because I believe that is a very important part we’ve done a great deal but of our programme. Students we have a great deal more to have shown their deep con- do. I think that I’m the can- cern about development and didate best placed to work poverty in the third world and with Gordon Brown as part I think it’s important that we of the leadership team and to remind students the Labour help Labour win that fourth government has made a huge term. I don’t think there is a difference in terms of work- huge ideological difference ing to Make Poverty History. between the candidates - I think that on the environ- me Hilary Benn, Alan John- ment engaging with students son and Peter Hain have all is something we need to do. I worked closely together over also feel that we should make the years, but I think that students and young people in what we need is a team with the party aware that they can experience, and I have a great have a big say in putting for- deal of experience in Parlia- ward policies for the future. ment over the last 25 years, Labour needs to be prepared experience but also breadth to listen to its members more, of reach - I think it would be and this includes students. good, if we have a Scottsh Prime Minister, to have a Do you think that the fact deputy from the South. The Labour is in government Prime Minister is going to be presents problems with get- a man but I think the Deputy ting young people on board, should be a woman to provide given that it’s ‘the establish- a proper balanced leadership ment?’ team, and Gordon and I have worked well in the past when I think that when you’re a I was his deputy when he was student is the time when you Shadow Chancellor. So those challenge the authorities and are the main reasons, I’d say. the establishment, but I feel that most people within the How do you see the role of Labour party are anti-estab- Deputy Leader? lishment and anti-authoritar- ian; I think that it does rep- I think the role shouldn’t in- resent a challenge, if you in volve running a big depart- government but what the ment. When John Prescott But actually we’re not run- there’s a campaign to be had which people were absolutely government wants to do is chose to be Deputy Leader of ning to write our own job de- Peter will be there to cam- on one side or the other and change things for the future, the party, Deputy Prime Min- scriptions, we are running to paign for it. So I have a lot of there were deep divisions. It’s not just keep the status quo. ister and Secretary of State be chosen by the party to be respect for him. Alan John- not like that, it’s more about The main thing to do is to for Local Government, the in the top leadership team. son I’ve known from when whose got the best qualities show ourselves to be open to Environment, Transport and he was in the Post Office in to take forward into the lead- students in terms of listening Energy, it was too much, and If you were not to win which Brent in North West London. ership and I’m saying it’s me. to them and what they have that it was the wrong focus. I of the current contenders I was on the National Execu- to say as well as giving them think that if you are Deputy would you be most comfort- tive Committee with him for an important role in deciding Prime Minister you should able seeing in the role? years when I was elected by How do you believe that policy - not just stuffing en- look across government rath- the party to be on the NEC, Labour can get its message velopes for the campaign. er than out over one depart- Well I think that’s quite a dif- and he was on the NEC as a across to students? Do you ment. So I think there should ficult question because I have trade union general secretary. think they’re having any Jack will be back with more po- also be one Chair of the party worked with Peter Hain for I know Hilary and Hazel as problems with that? litical madness next year! Science

Page 10 Editor’s Column A new window on the universe

New LOFAR telescope set to reveal secrets of star and galaxy formation Clare Cox mense; by combining thousands the Epoch of Reionization. LO- sists of 15,000 small antennae in Welcome to the final Science of smaller antennas, it is hoped FAR could help to answer these the Netherlands and Germany, section of the year. I hope you’re A new radio telescope could be that the next step in telescope questions. Another important with plans to extend its range by taking some time out from your the key to understanding the be- sensitivity can be taken. application will be to explore building stations all over Europe, revision to relax with the Wessex ginnings of the universe and en- One of the most important distant galaxies and space that including the UK. More than 12 Scene. able the study of distant galax- issues in cosmology is determin- have not been probed before. It UK universities are already in- Does space fascinate you? ies. The telescope, called LOFAR ing the exact time and circum- is expected that the technology volved and nearly €1 million in If so, you’ll be excited to learn (Low Frequency Array), is a next stances that caused the universe will uncover new phenomena in funds have been raised, enough about the new radio telescope generation radio telescope con- to emerge from the ‘Dark Ages’ the universe. that the first UK station can be developed to address unan- sisting of a network of antennae and begin star and galaxy for- The network currently con- built this summer. swered questions about our uni- situated across the Netherlands. mation during a time called verse. Professor Rob Fender of In other news, a behavioural the University of Southamp- study has shown that early in- ton’s School of Physics and As- tervention can help children tronomy, project leader of the with autism and even increase LOFAR:UK group, revealed his their IQ. Additionally, we’ve al- excitement for the plan, saying: ways been a bit suspicious of “Once the network is complete food additives but a new study it will form the largest radio tel- could confirm they have a bad escope ever built, opening up a reputation for a reason. new window on the universe.” Good luck with exams and I The technology is revolution- hope you enjoyed the Science ary because radio telescopes section this year! have barely changed since the 1960s, being based on huge science mechanical dish antennas. The @wessexscene.co.uk cost of making these larger is im- From this...... to this. The network will revolutionise telescopes E-numbers under scrutiny Hope for autism

Debate over safety of food additives for kids rages on Early intervention can increase IQ Ellie Parsons clinical studies failed to demon- published and unconfirmed, Fani Theodorou of the programme, parents were strate these links. have already led to calls that all more than willing to participate A new study into food addi- The Food Standards Agency additives should be banned from Children with autism showed an to help their children. The study tives is set to confirm that they therefore awarded the team a children’s food. The additives in improvement in language and was led by Professor Bob Rem- cause hyperactivity in children. £750,000 contract to follow up question have all been passed daily living skills and also in their ington of the School of Psychol- A source at Southampton Uni- the study, to determine how as ‘safe’ by the EU, although levels of Intelligence Quotient ogy, who did admit that the pro- versity has apparently supplied dangerous additives were in some are banned in Scandina- (IQ) following the implementa- gramme was hard work and a such information to industry pa- disrupting children’s behaviour. vian countries and the US. The tion of Early Intensive Behav- big commitment but added that per, The Grocer. The speculated The Food Additives and Behav- results will not be commented ioural Intervention (EIBI). he felt it was “harder to be help- results have reignited the debate iour in Children (FABiC) study is on publicly until the study has The home-based programme less.” about whether food additives also expected to reveal the neu- been published in a peer-re- was tried for 25 hours per week Today, an estimated 535,000 are harmful to children. rochemical mediators of any ad- viewed journal, after which the over a two-year period, with the people live in the UK with an au- A variety of additives, includ- ditive effects that are found. appropriate course of action can cooperation of trained staff and tistic condition. This early inter- ing sunset yellow (E110), and al- The findings, although un- be decided upon. the parents of autistic children. vention appears to help autistic lura red AC (E129), were given The courses were individualised children develop important skills to groups of three year-old and to meet the needs of each child that could allow them to be in- eight to nine year-old children. and this proved to be beneficial. cluded in mainstream schools. The preservative sodium ben- IQ levels improved significantly, With this in mind, the South- zoate (E211), found in many with two-thirds of the children ampton Childhood Autism pro- soft drinks, was also tested. The showing an increase. Indeed, gramme (SCAmP) research team results are expected to confirm one child saw their IQ leap from will continue to monitor the chil- a previous study carried out 30 to 70, while another showed dren to establish long-term ef- three years ago by the School an improvement from 72 to fects to improve the programme of Medicine and the School of 115. This is particularly impres- for others. Psychology, which linked these sive considering the general additives to behavioural prob- population have an average IQ A very big thank you to every- lems but showed there was also of between 85 and 115. one who contributed to the sec- a need for further research as Additives are used to colour a variety of children orientated foods Despite the intensive nature tion this year! features fashion arts lifestyle Bargain babies, The Maxi dress, mini Hat fair on, John Summer, travel tips dumb degrees prices? Hansard is off and the unseen 12 16 17 Southampton19 www.wessexscene.co.uk

The seriously sexy*

*Disclaimer: No writers are either serious or sexy, anything resembling sexiness or seriousness is to be over looked. Scene2 - special feature

Page 12 In no way serious recommendation, honestly this is only a joke, seriously, no really, it is... Top ten places to have sex at Southampton University Earlier in the year, we acciden- tally portrayed the Library as the sex-addict’s place of choice, tan- tamount to a dogging hot-spot. Aside from the obvious benefits of improving your grades and sexual repertoire, as you thrash it out between Darwin and Dickens, you should put a hold on that reserve collection of the Kama Sutra; The Wessex Scene many complaints that other ar- eas have been over-looked, here are some of their submissions.

Graduation ceremony: After three years many stu- dents are left feeling like they don’t know their coursemates well enough. This is the ideal place for those lustfully looking during the dreary seminars, a chance to make a move on the unknown quantity you glanced hands as you both reached for the latest handout. Alternative- ly, you are one of those blokes who sit at the back so you can Jesters dance floor: On a local resident: look down people’s tops in the The question is, would anyone SUSU has been pushing for more tiered lecture theatres. There is actually notice? It has the po- integration in the local commu- no better place to capitalise; it’s tential to become a very sweaty nity, you can do what you like, already hot and sticky, and very and messy swingers party. Some Mountbatten ashes: Uni-link bus: as long as you do it quietly, even dull, plus everyone makes a spe- say the only way of finding out Certainly commemorative, a lot Great for fans of a bumpy ride. better, ask permission first. Fur- cial effort to looks nice. Further- your partner would be random of new and exciting things were B&Cs brought in more double- thermore, as we’ve been cov- more, post-coital you have an DNA testing on all children born created by ECS – why not carry deckers, mainly to give privacy ering the unseen Southampton ideal chance to directly meet all to members of the AU the year on the tradition on their behalf, for those getting it on upstairs. - go on tour. What’s holding you the in-laws outside and share a after. In terms of performance, although very creative it does The main downside is the rates back? Actually, just do it with glass of Pimms. Be wise in your you can choose to selectively have a dangerous element whilst have gone up to £1.20, and a local, it might cheer up some choice of partner, the only clap remember what happened, and it is still a building site, so make with that increase less students residents. you really want is when you col- just assume you were great, the sure you take all your protective attempting it. Uni-link is for the lect your degree. By the way, if likelihood being quite the oppo- gear and test out that hard hat. natural performer, hence the Jubilee Sports Centre: a grey haired man asks you to site. Make sure you do it in daylight includsion of poles, as a bonus Carrying on a few other phi- bend down… Also recommend: Kaos, a dif- as you don’t want to mistakenly feature, when the pleasure is too losophies, if you’re looking for ferent clientele, same principle. hump a builder and make him much you just press stop. Great! a physical activity, what better The John Hansard angry. It’s so easy to get off. place for a full body work out. gallery: The Common: Also recommended: Bold- Whilst expanding your horizons Winchester students don’t seem Well, it’s happening there any- rewood, continue your develop- NOC: you get your value for money to be having much fun, but way, you might as well go out ment. There are often complaints that on your SportRec card and try make the most of what we do and join the fun. I’ve heard spec- sites are underrepresented, well out some new equipment at the have – this lovenest will suit ulation that the Northern end is Southampton General not in the Wessex Scene! Once same time. No need for protein the tastes of the more cultured for veterans, but that’s only a ru- Hospital: you’ve got the U6 down there, shakes to build muscle, there’s among you, one can perform mour. So best to just find a nice SGH is the perfect place to ca- 9 to 5 cooped up, there is very enough love for everyone. very publicly. Some art descends bush in the middle. ter for your needs from concep- little social activity, apart from very much into the obscure so Good for the outdoors types, tion to birth - just a few rooms a vending machine, the sexual Places to avoid: if anyone questions why you as a treat in the summer you can down the corridor. In and out tension is comparable to the Big Bevois Valley – Probably very are pulling off a 69 – just carry always share a Mr. Whippy (if of the wards health profession- Brother house. Make the most arrestable. on and pretend you’re part of you’re into pseudo-masochism) als develop quite a bond be- of the multi-million pound re- Nightingale building en- the latest exhibition providing or cool off in the lake. In the tween them, so taking it a step search Vessel (James Cooke) trance – those people in Nurses a social critique of societies in- Winter, you’ll just freeze – which further shouldn’t be a problem, which looks oddly like Titanic. uniforms are actually Nurses, hibitions. If you get caught on might encourage you to work and there are definitely plenty You can easily find someone to smash the dream – not all of CCTV you can pass it off as an harder. of beds available. Although you re-enact the scenes from film; them are Abi Titmuss replicas, “installation” and submit it to Also recommended: Botanti- don’t want to be picking up some by which I mean the nakedness have very busy timetables so the next Turner Prize. cal Gardens, do you even know nasty viruses. Parking is a bit of a and the painting and the roman- probably wouldn’t be able to Moving to the new complex where they are? Glen Eyre pond. problem, so I’d get the… tic bits, not the sinking and the spare you 3 minutes anyway. in 2011, time is running out, act death. That is definitely not on Hartley Library – it’s so passé. quickly. Thanks to CC, SW, CD, EJ, JW, LC & PW xx the agenda. features

www.wessexscene.co.uk Editor’s Column Bargain babies

Dearest devoted features read- ers,

Firstly, I would like to offer you all my sincerest commis- erations. Not only are you all swotting away like the busy lit- tle geek-bees I know you all are, but this is the last Wessex Scene, and hence the last features, of the year. That’s it, let it all out. No no, not that! Control your- selves god damn you.

Anyway, as I say, end as you’ve meant to have gone on and all that (I’m a little back- ward). So this issue is actually the best of the entire year if I may say so myself, and I do, because nobody else will. But seriously, this issue the soap-operatic life that is features offers you sex, scandal, bargain babies sex, rab- id monkeys, normal monkeys, Patrick Moore and sex. Not in that order, and certainly not all together in one place. There are special clubs for that sort of de- bauchery and this literary estab- lishment is not one of them. Ex- cept on Tuesdays between 2 and 4pm in the SUSU laundry room. Newcomers welcome.

Seeing as this is probably the Simon Webb and it became financially unvi- be sold on to customers. The development seemed to stut- last time I will ever get to have able to carry on development. product looked promising in the ter to a halt as it appears plant- my say in front of tens of people, Horrified, confused and slightly Though it was suggested that early pilot launches but it soon ing £5 notes in the ground and I would like to publicly thank al- aroused: these are but three the household cleaning section proved impossible to transport pouring water on them doesn’t cohol and The Labyrinth (star- emotions that the Wessex could be moved alongside the the brains because whenever work. Fortunately, Head of Ge- ring David Bowie) for getting Scene’s Simon Webb experi- infant foods for some clever the transport trucks went over ography John Stupendous came me through university. May our enced when he unearthed the ‘second sales’. bumps the brains developed to the rescue, pointing out that glorious relationship continue to disturbing product develop- You might have thought that ‘dropped baby syndrome’. pennies are far more suitable flourish for years to come. ments taking place in ASDA’s the introduction of Smart Price In an effort to reduce court seeds. ‘New Breed’ HQ, located some- Babies would cheapen what it costs and allow more time for And finally, we can reveal that While I’m thanking peo- where in the sprawling hell hole is to be human, but babies were parking offences, ASDA hoped ASDA have pumped £49 gazil- ple/inanimate objects, I would that is North Wales. nothing compared to the po- to introduce ASDA ASBOs that lion pounds into discovering a also like to express my deepest The most disturbing, and ap- tential ASDA Smart Price Lives. could be bought in the George substitute for water that firstly gratitude to you, the reader, and parently the most likely to actu- When disgruntled ASDA em- clothing section. But the plan competes with Evian and Volvic, you, the writers for... well... you ally make it to our shop shelves ployee Tom Average told his was nipped in the bud by the but also replaces the water they all know why. Keep up the good is the ASDA Smart Price Baby. boss to “get a life” after he court service when they realised use in their poultry. The logical work chaps. The initial concept behind the was given an official warning, that they would lose a stagger- conclusion was CH2ON + H2O product was that they could the ASDA busybodies initiated a ing 97.8% of their income. = Sugar Water. Yes dear reader, Solongfarewellaufweidersein, engineer the babies to respond chain of events that could have The much talked about, but ASDA planned to simply replace goodbye! only to ASDA Smart Price baby changed the face, and mindset, never seen Money Tree has been water with sugary water. Horrif- food and milk, monopolising of humanity. Human farms were unearthed by the Wessex Scene. ic. Fortunately the ‘new water’ Enjoli 40% of the infant population’s established in the desolate coun- It is rooted in the secret garden was too sticky to get out of the digestive intake and crippling ri- tryside of North Wales and after behind the SUSU buildings and bottles and the product never val supermarkets. Unfortunately, six weeks of development (to en- is under a 24/7 guard funded by left the laboratory. Alternatives the high water percentage in the sure quality) the crop of children both SUSU and ASDA. How else are already in the works with the babies (which was engineered were put down humanely, us- did you think SUSU manage to rare bottled urine of the Ginger features to reduce their cost and prolong ing angry monkey’s armed with pay Sabbatical officers £16,000 Panda looking the most likely to @wessexscene.co.uk their shelf life) caused diarrhoea, knives, and their brains were to for sitting on their arse? Product make it into our baskets. features

Page 14 Poor old Patrick Enjoli Liston in my living-room, hooked on to his charisma was that men sist with hands-on-heart and the woo Shilpa Shetty with his manly the film Four Weddings and a can “identify with him” because scout’s honour salute that they charms. And over, and over, and Poor old Patrick Moore. After Funeral. But it was not the raw his pathetic attempts at voicing watch Castaway for the “fit- over again they failed him – mis- heroically making a one-man- sex appeal of Andie MacDowell his sensitive side are so like their ties” – but everyone knows its erably. No wonder he’s bellow- stand to save the institution that that kept the boys amused, oh own. because they want to bitch and ing his commitment to televisual is British television from demonic no: it was the dithering, prepu- Although, these lady-like lads gossip just as much as any girl. masculinity at any microphone ‘women commanders’, and gal- bescent, school-girl charm of are by no means comfortable Maybe this explains why ex-A that accidentally comes his way. lantly speaking out against the Hugh Grant which captivated with the outside world knowing Team actor Dirk Benedict sym- It reminds me of those poor de- monster that is Feminisation and their hearts. One housemate that they tune into a lot more pathises with Moore. Over, and luded men who install the big- its equally malevolent (but subtly even commented that the key than just Top Gear. They may in- over, and over again he tried to gest and loudest exhaust-pipe cunning) side-kick Political Cor- they can find on their little Nis- rectness, BBC bosses just gave san Micras. him the media-speak equivalent So what Patrick Moore didn’t of a little pat on the head, and realise when he ventured off on told him to go back to playing his mission of criticism (clearly with his telescope. The legen- without a woman to direct him) dary 84 year-old presenter of is that men actually enjoy femi- The Sky at Night criticised Brit- nine programmes. The vast and ish television for being too bor- superfluous numbers of clone ingly feminine, and suggested reality shows wouldn’t exist if that women should either have the British public didn’t una- their own channel or just surren- shamedly lap them up. What’s der the airwaves to their male really got Moore’s goat is that superiors. But what he doesn’t no one, apart from Moore him- realise is that men actually love self, has actually watched an the soap operas, cooking shows episode of The Sky at Night in and quiz programmes that he well over a decade. No amount sees as dull and corruptive to the of misguided (though thor- male psyche. In fact a poll of my oughly entertaining) misogyny housemates revealed that three can bring back the ‘Golden Age’ in four men watch Neighbours for poor Patrick. Luckily for the everyday, and even feel “unful- viewing public, the BBC has ten- filled” if they miss an episode... derly but firmly tucked him back I came downstairs a few nights up in his spaceship-shaped bed ago to find a large congregation Want some Moore? Not if you’re going to talk to me like that where he belongs. Life’s lessons learnt Luke Catterson only person I know who ever with them. Only if you are trying tiful/fairly pretty/passable girl- she “bloody loved him” and does this. to make a point to someone is friend looks far better when she was cackling loudly. She looked In a desperate bid for some * Nobody pretends their leg the use of a second class stamp is smiling than when she looks extremely happy but the image form of catharsis, here is a list of is a guitar anymore. As part of worthwhile. sad.” I have little to no critical was infinitely less beautiful than things that I have learned in the a music video channel’s count- * Don’t ‘I-spy’ emotions. I appreciation of music but I think the lonely girl sat nearby. past year with explanations of down of ‘The Best Truly Awful played ‘I-spy’ and with my little it should help convey my point. I think the point I’m getting at varying length and clarity; Songs Ever’ they showed Paul eye I spied happiness. My op- Katrina and the Waves’ ‘Walk- is that I’m a big fan of pathos. * The concept of steak fla- Gascoigne singing ‘Fog on the ponent eventually gave up and ing on Sunshine’ is a great song. * If you decide to write a voured crisps is rubbish. They are Tyne’ and large parts of the told me that was cheating. An It is a happy cheerful tune but newspaper article you should no different to beef flavoured video were taken up by Gazza argument ensued. it is not beautiful. Bonnie Tyler’s pick something frivolous. Topics crisps because it is not possible raising his leg and pretending * Sad things are more beauti- ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ is a such as love and human nature to differentiate between differ- to strum it like a guitar. This art ful than happy things. Why else similarly excellent song but it have been mined by the greatest ent cuts of meat through artifi- form seems to have died out. do models pout in their photos? has a beauty to it created by the minds in history and so it is un- cial flavouring. It’s just a market- * You should never send a Why is wife beating so popular if inherent sadness. likely that you will have some- ing ploy. letter with a second class stamp. not because husbands find their I once left the Cube and thing insightful to add. These * Urinating on sauna coals is A first class stamp costs 34 pence wives to look more beautiful there was a girl sat on a chair great minds have neglected top- hilarious in theory only. and a second class stamp costs with tears in their eyes? These at the top of the stairs. She was ics such as the merits of Connect * People who don’t take a sip 24 pence. If you choose to buy a are of course flippant examples alone and stared at the floor just Four and so these are the sub- from a glass they are handed be- second class stamp you save ten but I find it very difficult to ex- in front of her looking lonely. It jects that should be addressed. fore putting it down are in the pence. A saving of ten pence is press what I mean by this. Ad- was a tragic image but a beauti- “I always pass on good ad- minority. I have one friend who, not worth the arguments with mittedly facetious wife beating ful one. A few seats away was vice. It is the only thing to do when given a drink, will put it the recipient of your letter who citations don’t help. People have a girl sat talking on her phone. with it. It is never of any use to straight down on the table with- feels slighted by your reluctance responded by saying: “What do She was telling what is safe to oneself.” I hope these lessons out drinking from it. She is the to pay 34 pence to correspond you mean? My intensely beau- assume was her boyfriend how prove to be of use to you. features

www.wessexscene.co.uk

Here we see the new Head of Humanities casting a watchful and critical eye over the new intake of students Degrees dumb you down Abe Jacobs television corrupts these once Wessex Scene: “We are an equal print. (The Wessex Scene has on the Planet, in the UCOTP virile minds and turns them into opportunities university, and by never met the goalie’s girlfriend, awards, losing out to Newcastle It has come to light in recent sloth-like trolls unable to con- that criteria we have to allow it is only an assumption based with La Paz in Bolivia the clear months that the University of verse using words, preferring an abnormally large number on logic that she would be as winner. The average attractive- Southampton actually makes to communicate with farts and of primates onto our courses. un-evolved as him, whoever he ness of a Southampton resident students 15% less intelligent. A ‘w*nker’ gestures. They only want to evolve, and is). is thought to be as low as 3.5 survey of 250 students showed When questioned on the we want to help them with that The stupidity and chimp out of 10, with one in five peo- that 80% of them were less in- goal.” Monkeys. He means problem is being taken on by ple dropping as low as the ‘un- telligent now than when they real monkeys. This reporter is pest-control and a rehabilitative watchable’ classification. began their university careers. “A levels shocked to the core. Although, it service for students which allows Meanwhile the university The study has raised a number does explain a lot, like how one them to retake their GCSEs and students will continue to bat- of questions as to why this has and in five people are nicknamed re-gain their lost knowledge. tle through adversity, drinking come to be the case. ‘monkey’. The Wessex Scene The goal is for all students to themselves to Alzheimer’s and It may be that A-Levels and now feels silly for not spotting it understand diphthongs and al- early-yet-timely graves. There is GCSEs are actually quite hard, GCSEs are earlier. kanes by the end of 2008, and hope that a select few of South- and students working for them Unfortunately for the humans to be able to subtract two num- ampton’s finest will actually go spend longer hours studying for actually of Southampton the primate bers from three numbers using on to earn jobs in the job mar- them and have more teaching population has had a devolving only a crayon and some paper ket, but it is accepted that most than at university. Humanities effect on other students, forcing by 2009. will simply retreat back to their students fared the worst, with quite them to forget how to use their Southampton has also been farms or sailing boats, never to some learning for as little as opposable thumbs and fingers. voted the third Ugliest City be seen again. four hours a week, two of which hard” Many students have been spot- were optional. GCSE students matter a staggering 95% of ted in Lord of the Rings theme- are now made to work 26-hour students replied that they were pubs pointing not with their “We have to allow days, which works out as a lot “not bovered”, and proceeded hands but with their elbows, and more than a History student, and to drink an alcopop in broad many of them even have GCSEs. can be worked out using GCSE daylight, seemingly unaware of Perhaps Terry Gilliam’s science an abnormally large maths. University level History is what they were doing. The re- fiction thriller Twelve Monkeys useless for sums. maining 5% simply belched and was actually referring to the uni- number of primates Some people believe that the rubbed their naked buttocks on versity football squad and the vast alcohol consumption of stu- our reporter’s clipboard. A uni- goalie’s girlfriend. This theory dents and the abuse of daytime versity spokesperson told the is unlikely, but droll enough to onto our courses” fashion

Page 16 Editor’s Column Maximum impact Wessex Scene examines the maxi-dress This is the last issue that I will be Lorna Longworth but high impact garment that can Charlie’s Angels chic, or with flat street styles and the cat-walk editing so I would like to take be both glamorous and relaxed. ballet pumps for an everyday inspirations behind them. Don’t this opportunity to thank eve- With a definite 70s influence Choose between plain colours, look. Don’t forget flowing hippy be scared to embrace prints and ryone who got involved over boho maxi-dresses may prove graphic prints, paisley and 70s hair and big curls to complete patterns, for as you can see they the last year and wrote articles, the perfect antidote to all the prints and spots or stripes. Wear the look. At the same time don’t really do make an impact. If you took photographs or just sent 60s-inspired mini-dresses that them with Sienna-style gladiator make like Joss Stone and wear must do plain, then go for a bold feedback. It was all greatly ap- prevail on the high street. The sandals, jewelled flip-flops for too many bangles! Here for your colour. preciated. If you are interested maxi-dress is a low-maintenance delectation are a mix of high- in writing for the fashion section just send an email to the address at the bottom of this column.

The sun may have left us for a while, but let’s not get dis- heartened - before long we’ll be back in our flip-flops and mini- dresses. So in this issue we take a look at a hot summer trend: the maxi-dress.

We also explore boardshorts for the boys: a look that’s al- ready all over campus and the city centre.

Finally, I would like to wish you all good luck in exams and essays. At some point you will be able to take off those jogging bottoms and comfy old car- die and reclaim your social life. Don’t despair and happy shop- ping! fashion @wessexscene.co.uk Get on board this summer Summer doesn’t really mean a massive change in male ward- robes. For many the season- change is marked by an increase in short-sleeves and occasion- ally flip-flops. Lighter fabrics and colours but essentially the same style, jeans, t-shirts, or maybe the odd wife-beater for the brave.But this summer the combat, surfer short, and three-quarter length trouser will be widespread as lads eve- rywhere show off an ankle and maybe even a knee. Resourceful enough for Newquay to Ibiza, beach or barbecue, these shorts can be dressed up or down and it wont take too much imagina- tion.Taken from www.asos.com here are the best-selling board- short trends to keep you cool this summer. arts

www.wessexscene.co.uk Editor’s graces Nuffield Column Tchaikovsky the Want to win tickets to Tchaikovsky’s last opera, The Queen of Spades? Kat Slowe of the musical genius, the play ing changed her name and bur- you. is a great insight into the life and ied all evidence of her past life If you would like an to oppor- As the final term draws to a nature of Tchaikovsky, as well as she is forced to to confornt her tunity to catch the marvelous close, The Nuffield Theatre spoils showing the influences on his tragic past once her daughter Tchaikovky and The Queen of This is my last issue as Arts Editor us with a fantastic new slection performances. discovers her old letters in the Spades at the Nuffield simply and it has been a great pleasure of performaces that is sure to While the content may seem attic. Directed by Polly Teale, answer the following question to learn more about the arts in entertain. somewhat dated, the play is winner of the Evening Standard to win two tickets. the Southampton area. Tchaikovsky’s last opera, The wonderflully modern in its deliv- Award for Best Director in 2003, What nationality was Tchaik- This edition offers tickets to Queen of Spades, follows the ery and embraces its own theat- this moving story is a must see, ovksy? the Nuffield which will be given story of Herman, who is torn ricality marvellously. having already received rave re- a) British away on a first come first served between the love of his life, Lisa, Of course if this is not not views for its previous performa- b) Italian basis. There is also an article on and his gambling obsession, all your cup of tea, other attrac- ces. c) Russian many of the upcoming festivals the while struggling to prise a tions at the Nuffield include Finally, for something a little Send your asnwer to arts@ this summer, for anyone wishing powerful secret from an age- Clare Summerskil Acts Her Age. more lighthearted, Allan Dos- wessexscene.ac.uk for a chance to have a fun day out. ing Countess that would ensure The play follows the life of 40 ser’s Lies Have Been Told is a to win. Finally, the article on the John wealth and richess for a life- year-old lesbian Claire who is humorous, if somewhat dark, in- Hansard Gallery’s move to the time. The Nuffield production of stuck pondering the themes of vestigation into the mysterious city centre highlights effectively Tchaikovsky and The Queen of jealosuy, betrayal, love and old death of Robert Maxwell after Southampton’s growing stature Spades, by John Clifford, incor- age as her long-term relation- he disappeared from his yacht in as a cultural city. porates this touching melodra- ship abruptly comes to an end. 1991. Was it a simple drowing, The importance of the John ma and episodes of Tchaikoc- Nuffield Theatre is also proud a tragic suicide or a well-planned Hansard Gallery to modern art sky’s life, most notably his odd to welcome back celebrated Mafia assasination? Was he the often remains unrecognised by relationship with his wealthy theatre company Shared Expe- victim of anti-semitism of just the majority of students. We are patroness Madame von Meck, rience and their newest produc- snobbery? We will very lucky to possess such a gal- who funded Tchaikovsky’s gen- tion Kindertransport. It is a pow- let him try and lery on our university campus. ius for 13 years. An exploration rful and provocative look at the con- into how a powerful mutual turbulent story of a young Jew- vince love of music can draw people ish girl, Eva, evacauted to Britian arts together, it is story about pas- from Germany just before the @wessexscene.co.uk sion and forgiveness. For fans outbreak of World War II. Hav- The Hansard leaves Uni for new City arts complex A discussion of the new arts complex in the town centre, with John Hansard Director Stephen Foster Kat Slowe and this is something that such air events may be held in the forming Arts Organisation. The gallery has collaborated projects as the new arts complex future. Stephen explained the “We’ve designed this so that with members of many different Stephen Foster, an accomplished aim to fix. Stephen discussed the John Hansard Gallery’s role all the facilities work together”, academic faculties, including po- and charming man of mid- how Southampton would be in the ongoing development, Stephen informed me. litical philosophy and sociology dle years, has been Director of culturally enriched with this new saying: “Our job is to lead the “The different sections will ,in their research to redefine the the John Hansard Gallery since addition. regeneration of that part of the share two auditoria, a dance borders of what constitutes art. 1987. Recent plans to build a Stephen said: “In one small city.” studio, a rehearsal room, four Their innovation is recognised new arts complex in Southamp- area of the city will be situated Stephen, also Chairman for meeting rooms, an artists’ studio on a global scale. ton’s City Centre mean that the and state of the art film produc- “People in the art world know Gallery is set to become an even tion facilities.” what the John Hansard Gal- greater player in the global arts It is likely that the different lery stands for”, Steven stated scene; the new space will make sections will collaborate to pro- proudly. it the second largest temporary duce increasingly innovative “It has a very clear sense of exhibitions Gallery in the UK. I displays. The John Hansard Gal- identity.” asked Stephen what he believed lery is currently showing an ex- The University of Southamp- this new complex would mean hibition involving Chinese film, ton, which part funds the John for the John Hansard Gallery. and Stephen stated: “the gallery Hansard Gallery, should benefit He explained how the new might in the future be interested from its move. complex would give the JHG a in displaying art that is perform- “We will give the University greater presence in the city. In An artist’s impression of the new complex ance related.” a much bigger presence in the addition, he noted how he con- the Mayflower, the BBC, the li- the Cultural Consortium, de- The John Hansard Gallery City”, Stephen claimed. sidered the new complex would brary, the heritage museum, the scribed this work as being “to itself has had a very successful For those who do not wish have an impact on Southampton Guildhall, the Millais Gallery, a large extent about integrating year. Its next exhibition, titled to lose the John Hansard Gal- City as a whole, saying: “It will the City Art Gallery, the Bargate the many different sectors of North and South is a collabo- lery from the University campus, put Southampton as a cultural Monument Gallery, and the new Southampton’s art scene.” ration of six different galleries, Stephen assures them that the centre on the map.” arts complex with its various This is where the new arts three in Sunderland and three in gallery will maintain some sort The new arts centre is part participants.” complex plays such a vital role, Southampton. The gallery, due of presence onsite, stating: “we of a grander scheme to create a Plans are already in place to as in addition to the John Han- to its situation on the univer- will continue to have a visual Cultural Quarter for Southamp- entirely rejuvenate the Guild- sard Gallery its members will sity campus, is ideally placed to footprint on campus.” ton. The city is often criticised for hall Square, in which it is antici- include City Eye (video technol- come up with some pioneering The new arts complex will having no truly definable centre, pated a large number of open ogy), Arts Asia, and The Per- concepts for their exhibitions. open in 2011. arts

Page 18 Summer of folk, fairs and musical busses

Grab some fun and sunshine in the southwest as the festival seasons kicks off...

til May 20 with song and dance It’s all free, but expect to see lots filling the streets as people cel- of hats being passed around for ebrate contemporary and tradi- donations (hence the name). tional folk and blues music. A For something a little more further wide array of events will local, starting from May 31, take place throughout the city’s Hoglans Park will for three days theatres, pubs and music ven- become a hive of art, music, film ues, some free and some not, and dance as the BBC Blast Tour but all promising some amuse- truck makes its stop in South- ment. Top performances include ampton, and it really does seem influential folk band Waterson: to have something for every- Carthy and stand up comedian body. Idiot and Friend. This is in addi- In an attempt to help young tion to dance performances from guys and girls become more around 20 different teams. creative, workshops and master Something else not be missed classes, run by both industry pro- at Winchester is their renowned fessionals and local artists. They Hat Fair. This is Britain’s longest offer sessions on many subjects running festival of street theatre. including, but not limited to, The hat fair in Winchester, which is Britain’s longest running festival of street theatre In a typical year, over 30,000 graffiti art, poetry and writing, Francois Kotze one of the prestigious Tate’s, precious summer days inside people flock to the city streets film making, editing and DJ’ing. nor do we have West End scale some building.” Well cast that to watch this festival, which The Truck itself, equipped with Regardless of a few debatable productions queuing up to per- worry aside and rejoice, as May combines a mix of circus acts, state of the art technology, will shortcomings in other cultural form, yet I maintain that we are and June mark the beginnings of clowning, outlandish perform- be used to showcase their crea- areas, Southampton has al- spoiled for choice. some prominent events that can ances, craft stalls, workshops tions. It is all free and talent is ways had the fortune of being Now you’re probably think- be fully enjoyed outdoors. and world music. It takes place not a prerequisite, but you must a somewhat keen patron of the ing, “It all sounds interesting, First to Winchester, where on the first weekend in July, register at the BBC Blast website arts. We might not be home to but I don’t want to spend my the May fest is in full swing un- Thursday through to Sunday. beforehand. Art kids What’s On give back The Vagina Monologues Chinese Video Now Orlando Consort Francois Kotze by Eve Esler John Hansard Gallery Machaut’s Messe De Nostre Dame The Mayflower Theatre A selection of the wonderful new work Turner Sims Concert Hall For all those who have ever con- Following a sell-out season last year, The from a new generation of artists in China, Dating from the mid-fourteenth century, sidered the pursuit of art to be Vagina Monologues returns to The May- influenced by Digital Video Technology. this stunning muscial achievement adds a somewhat selfish and perhaps flower with a brand new celebrity cast. modern twist to stylistic medival music. unproffitbale, read on. Along The World is Ours with providing many of our Bargate Monument Gallery cultural needs, The Millias Gal- Open entry exhibition exploring what it Southampton University lery briefly became the host of means to be human in today’s world. Symphony Orchestra a charity art auction for the spe- Turner Sims Concert Hall

Concerts cial needs Forest Edge school in Totton. Original illustrations by both final-year art students and staff were auctioned off. Selling Le Grand Cirque My Best Friend their creations spoke volumes The Mayflower Theatre Director: Patrice Leconte about the goodwill of the stu- With an international cast of 50 acro- Country of Origin: France dents and shows how art can bats, this beautifully performed show will The Caiman not only draw in the big bucks take your breath away. Director: Nanni morretti but can benefit a lot of people, Harbour Lights Cinema if not always in the ways we The Tempest Eternally Unfinished Attempt to Italian satirical comedy about a dissalu- expect. And it benefited some Winchester Theatre Royal Grasp Everything as it Happens by sioned film-maker who finds finds him- of the artists in more way than Film Exhibitions Theatre June 13-16 Charlotte White self in hot water following a controversial one - student Katrina Hansford A bizzare modern take on Shakespeare. Bargate Monument Gallery screenplay. drew inspiration for her illustra- tions from her son Kraig, who Note: listings are neither comprehensive nor infallible. Please ring ahead! (Remember to ask for your student discount.) The Nuffield Theatre: 023 8067 1771; The also attends Forest Edge school. Mayflower Theatre: 023 8071 1811; The Theatre Royal Winchester: 019 6284 0440; The John Hansard Gallery: 023 8059 2158; The Millais Gallery: 023 8031 9916; The One of her draft books, which Turner Sims Concert Hall: 023 8059 5151; The Phoenix Cinema: 08707650763.; Harbour Lights Picture House: 0870 755 1237. concerns an autistic dinosaur, has already become a hit with the staff. lifestyle

www.wessexscene.co.uk Editor’s Column Tick heath care off the list Students warned to beware of deadly TBE disease in Europe Natasha Harding side, and therefore the chance of contracting the disease. It is In this last issue of the year The summer holidays are ap- estimated that there are over we’ve got some important tips proaching and many of us will 10,000 cases of TBE each year. on how to avoid getting bogged be taking a break in a foreign TBE-infected ticks are typically down by revision stress. We’ve country or even spenidng some found in rural and forest areas also got seven sizzling summer more extended time abroad from late spring and through- drink recipes to help you unwind travelling. As students prepare to out summer. High-risk groups after a long day at the library, or fly away on amazing trips there include visitors to rural areas of to kick start your post-exam cel- will be many things to consider endemic countries, especially ebrations. – finances, destinations, tour- those participating in outdoor For those of you planning ist attractions, and what to take activities such as trekking, hik- summer travels in Europe, this with you. ing, climbing, cycling and camp- issue includes some must read Without wishing to dampen ing. advice on how to avoid illness. the excitement of such pros- Measures to reduce the risk Lastly, if you’ve been mean- pects, we at Lifestyle feel it is im- of infection include using insect ing to give your student house portant to highlight one of the repellent, wearing trousers and a spring clean why not get the more serious aspects of holidays long-sleeved clothing to cover You wouldn’t want one of these things in your holiday snap How Clean is Your House? la- abroad: there is a disease in Eu- all areas of exposed skin when dies in for some help? rope which experts are warning can lead to meningitis and in se- Lithuania, Norway, Poland, Ro- in the countryside, and regularly We hope you’ve enjoyed the travelers to be particularly aware rious cases result in paralysis and mania, Russia, Serbia, Slovakia, inspecting for tick bites. The dis- new Lifestyle section this year. of. death, is now rife in 27 countries Slovenia, Sweden, Switzerland ease can also be transmitted by Good luck with your exams TBE is a very serious disease, across mainland Europe. Coun- and Ukraine, as well as the more the ingestion of unpasteurised and have a fantastic summer! with about one in 30 cases tries in which TBE is widespread common tourist destinations of milk which should be avoided. proving fatal. It is contracted are: Albania, Austria, Belarus, France, Germany, Greece and Further information and ad- by the bite of an infected tick, Bosnia, Croatia, Czech Repub- Italy. vice is available at www.masta- lifestyle and leading scientists have con- lic, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, Global warming increases the travel-health.com/tickalert. @wessexscene.co.uk firmed that the disease, which Hungary, Latvia, Liechtenstein, number of ticks in the country- Bon Voyage! lifestyle

Page 20 Don’t stress

Some handy hints on how to avoid getting run down by stress over the exam period Kylie MacLellan items as you complete them will important to get some sleep. Eat well minutes at a time, so don’t tax also give you a sense of accom- Your body needs rest and you Eating proper meals at regular yourself by trying to cram as With exams looming the pres- plishment. should get at least six hours times is very important and will much information as possible for sure can get too much, especial- sleep if you are going to be able ensure you have enough energy hours. If your mind is saturated ly when the sun is shining and all Sleep well to feel fresh enough to concen- to tackle your revision. with information it won’t make you want to do is sit out on the Do not work all night - it is trate each day. Avoid overuse of stimulants any difference how many hours grass in front of the Stag’s Head such as tea, coffee, tobacco, you spend revising - nothing will with a glass of Pimm’s. So we’ve chocolate and cola. They can go in. put together a list of handy re- cause fatigue, disturb sleep pat- vision hints to help you through terns and harm your adrenal Know your peak these stressful weeks. glands (which regulate your re- Choose a time of the day sponse to stress). when you feel most comfort- Plan your day Make sure you maintain a bal- able studying. Be it early in the Try to establish a routine that anced diet which is high in fresh morning or late at night, find a allows time for meals, sleep, re- fruits, vegetables, grains, beans, routine that suits you best: alone vising and relaxing. Put together and seafood. Snacking on Pick or with a group, in short bursts a timetable and start planning and Mix at your desk in the li- or larger revision sessions. well before exams begin. Plan to brary is not good enough! Some study one subject a day: switch- foods are more calming than Exercise ing between them too often will others: milk, for example, con- Exercise will give you more mean you do not take in infor- tains a natural morphine which energy and endurance. Not only mation as well. helps to calm you down. will it calm you down, but it will Make a list of the major points also increase the rate of blood of each topic. This helps break Take breaks flow around the body and the down your work into small, The average concentration brain, helping you think more manageable chunks. Ticking off Is the pressure piling up as fast as the books on your desk? span of a human being is 45 clearly. lifestyle

www.wessexscene.co.uk How Clean is YOUR House? Need saving from the squalor of your student house? Give Kim and Aggie a call Natasha Harding vas Kim Woodburn and Aggie a mix of horror, fascination and festering of corners. Mackenzie have won the hearts humour as Kim, armed with her Do you despair at the mess How clean is your house? Be of the nation. They already have glamorous rubber gloves, tackles your housemates make? Are you honest now, we know that the three hit series under their belts the grime hotspots and gets the fed up with living in a dirty dive? average student house is hardly and the book version, also enti- guilty parties scrubbing away Do you detest visiting a certain a place of hygiene heaven, and tled How Clean is Your House?, too. No-one gets away easily friend because of the state of Kim and Aggie know that too! is proving a literary hit. on this show and as they clean, their living standards? Which is why for their fifth series The cleaning duo are on the Kim and Aggie reveal the tricks There is no charge involved, of the popular show How Clean trail of the most horrifyingly of the trade and the household they do all the clearing and is Your House? they are looking filthy homes and their owners - secrets only the real pros have cleaning for free, so this should for student participation. The no dark, dirty corners will remain previously known. appeal to every student! Kim cleaning couple are very keen untouched. Hygiene expert Kim Aggie also pulls no punches and Aggie are ready and waiting to get young people involved in Unfamiliar to many students is raring to get her mitts on when she doles out the shocking to transform your squalid stu- the show and they quite rightly tles and a week-old pizza left on the rooms of doom - even the scientific facts behind the dirt in dent homes into plush pads! think that student houses are al- the side among random student grungiest of toilets isn’t enough our homes - how toilets are of- So, if you are ready to admit ways in need of a good clean! In possessions, is one which we all to hold her back. And beware all ten cleaner than kitchens, how you need some helpful house- fact, Kim and Aggie would have connect with student accommo- bugs, germs and microbes when we share our pillows with thou- hold hints or if you would like to a field day!!! dation. dirt detective Aggie gets out her sands of bugs and how quickly nominate someone to be given Student homes are stereotyp- With their trademark mari- scanning equipment - no lurking microbes multiply in our fridges. practical advice by Kim and Ag- ically messy and untidy. The vi- golds and no-nonsense approach organism is safe from her beady But not to fear, she has a wealth gie then please get in contact! sion of a sink full of unwashed to cleaning up Britain’s worst eyes. of environmentally friendly solu- Ring 01494 733568 or e mail plates, rows of empty wine bot- filth offenders, dust busting di- Viewers watch the show with tions on hand to target the most [email protected] Top summer drink recipes Unwind after a hard day of revision by sipping one of our seven summer sizzlers Kylie MacLellan - 30ml light rum use chilled red wine and serve - 30ml lime juice over lots of ice. 1) Mojito – Serves 4 - 1 teaspoon sugar - Ice - 1 oz strawberries 6) Classic Pimms – Serves 1 - 180ml light rum - 1/3 pint Pimms - 12 mint sprigs Put the ingredients into a blend- - 2/3 pint lemonade - 6 tablespoons fresh lime juice er. Blend until smooth and pour - 1 slice cucumber - 4 tablespoons sugar into a glass garnished with a - 1 slice orange - Soda water strawberry. - 1 slice lemon - 4 slices lime - 1 slice apple 5) Sangria - Jug - 1 pinch mint Place ice in shaker then add the - 1 bottle of red wine - 1 strawberry rum, 8 broken up mint sprigs, - 1 lemon cut into wedges lime juice and sugar. Shake well - 1 orange cut into wedges Stick it all in a glass or jug. Stir. and serve over ice. Top off each - 1 lime cut into wedges Drink. glass with a splash of soda wa- - 2 tablespoons sugar ter. Garnish each with a slice of - Splash of orange juice And if you’re not drinking… lime and a sprig of mint. - 2 shots of gin 7) Safe Sex on the Beach – - 1 cup of sliced strawberries or Serves 1 2) Pina Colada – Serves 2 raspberries - Ice - 1 1/2 cup ice - 1 small can of diced pineapples - 50mls peach juice You can even add decorations to the edge of the glass - 1/2 cup diced pineapple, fro- (with juice) – 150mls pineapple juice zen Pour the drink into two glasses Fill a highball glass with ice. - 4 cups ginger ale – 150mls orange juice - 60ml pineapple juice and garnish the rim with pineap- Pour the vodka, cranberry and – juice of half a lime - 60ml coconut milk ple slices. grapefruit juice over the ice. Stir Pour wine in the pitcher and – 1 lime wedge - 45ml white rum gently. Squeeze the lime into the squeeze the juice wedges from – 1 strawberry - 30ml dark rum 3) Sea Breeze – Serves 1 drink, and then drop it into the the lemon, orange and lime - Pineapple slices - Ice glass. Serve. into the wine. Toss in the fruit Into a shaker ½ filled with ice - 60ml vodka wedges and pineapple then add add the peach, pineapple, or- Put the ice, frozen pineapple, - 60ml cranberry juice 4) Strawberry Daiquiri – Serves sugar, orange juice and gin. Chill ange and lime juice. Stir and juice, coconut milk and the white - 60ml grapefruit juice 1 overnight. Add ginger ale, ber- strain into an ice-filled Garnish and dark rums into a blender. - Lime wedge - Ice ries and ice just before serving. with a lime wedge, strawberry Blend until smooth and frosty. - Highball glass - 15ml strawberry schnapps If you’d like to serve right away, and orange twist. lifestyle

Page 22 The Unseen Southampton Phil Webb Brighton, which doesn’t seem own West End, and as it turns bled across a dogging hot-spot. very calm. out, it just isn’t as glamorous. The park is scenic as you’d ex- A free day is somewhat of a lux- Legend has it the Viking King pect and the most notable fea- ury, there was absolutely nothing Canute attempted to command West End ture is obviously the lake. With I had to do, and the grizzly look- the tide to halt here in South- The one man to grasp the vi- only a couple of fishermen ing weather had not dampened ampton, it might have been a sion was Banjo, he hopped in, around the most prominent fea- my enthusiasm to search for an good place, the low tide reveals mp3-ed the tunes of CSS and ture were the beautiful greyland adventure. The Isle of Wight was a seaweed covered quicksand we stopped for petrol, the fumes geese, who from nowhere man- a possibility, or even a likelihood mud-fest. I can’t imagine actu- filling the sense that Southamp- aged to instantly produce ten as I had already grudgingly con- ally swimming here, but on the ton was our oyster. The apathet- plus geese-lings just by standing cluded that I was just not wacky plus side, if you are looking to ic attendant killed the mood; up. enough to book a random flight see a different side of South- “So, we’re heading out of the Our worry over a stray and go somewhere out of the struck our first major problem, ampton this is a good spot with city, where should we go, any- sock and whether there was a blue. by default the unknown means extensive views of the docks, where?” drowned body once attached Then, over a period of hours, you don’t know where you’re sea breeze and a beach. (shrugs). “Literally, anywhere to it was short lived. We were it dawned on, I didn’t need to going, and we were driving by – what would you do?” “Stay starving. In search of food we look so far a field, I’ve lived in committee, which becomes “When you reside in here.” “You think we should just drove straight for West Southampton for 5 years and problematic when one of you the student Bermuda just turn round and go home.” End, and decided to stop at the a had pretty varied experience abstains. In this trip I was hoping triangle, you can eas- “Yes”. first pub we saw and happened too, but there is so much of the to achieve a number of unique ily become trapped in across The White Swan, which City that I’ve never seen. When lifetime experiences, being re- Highfield, Portswood, was closed and more important- you reside in the student Ber- assured by the presence of the City Centre axis of ly half way through demolition. muda triangle, you can easily Woolston CO-OP was not one evil.” There was were groups of become trapped in Highfield, I’d anticipated. kids on the street, but that made Portswood, City Centre axis of It turns out we were actu- The beach itself is shingle, so it no different to any other part evil. With a City documented as ally going to the Weston shore, the chances of making a sand- of Southampton I’d ever seen. covering 49.84km, I’d be sur- which was a few bendy roads castle are minimal, and further- We finally reached The Master prised if you’ve covered even a and confusion further on. Wes- ing our disappointment either Builder, after a U-turn realising tenth of it in your experience, ton is an area of Southampton they were the wrong type of I’d just gone past a pub. It prom- and no, getting on the wrong trying to emulate the success stones or our skimming abil- ised “Good Food” but right now, bus doesn’t really count. stories of St Mary’s, as John reli- ity has disintegrated completely. I’d settle for anything. I’ll concede that I’ve been to ably informed me, that the area The SRB also gave birth to a It was family pub with greying Shirley NHS walk-in centre and is currently part of a Single Re- playground, and our sense of ad- occupants, which one can infer the Post office collection and generation Budget (SRB) run- venture was overriding, until an is typical of the area. With less even as far as Millbrook for the ning until this year; £1 million of aggressive old man waded over We were searching for cul- of the hurly-burly of city life, no Megabowl and 5-a-side caged government funding has been and said “you’re ****ing ruin- ture, trying to travel. I explained music but a genial atmosphere football, so I definitely wanted ploughed in, with another 1.5 ing it for the kids” right in-front to Banjo that it was like going the setting was a good catalyst to go the other side of the wa- coming privately. In fairness, the of his grandchild. If I’d had my round Ireland with a fridge, at for what between us is very nat- ter. My plans to just open the only reason we even knew it ex- wits about me I would’ve point- which point he realised that he ural conversation, film, football, map up, close my eyes and point isted was because he’d written ed out that his language would was my fridge and was possibly the state of the family, putting would probably lead to the pros- an essay on it, proof, if needed, probably have a more harmful offended that he was now could the world to rights. We had long pect of sitting in the drizzle in a that some parts of Southampton affect on her, rather than our in- be referenced as large and im- enough to talk, with everything field. As much as I like my own are unseen and unheard. nocent fun-seeking. mobile object rather than ‘cool’. on the menu made from scratch. company, I need some, and a bit In entering what has been Our Weston experience was This wasn’t our first shared It was definitely worth the wait, of inspiration. After watching an labelled a “deprived” area, we tied/teed off with some Pitch travel experience in Southamp- but holding for drinks too, there uninspiring Saints go down 2-1 rocked up expecting to see fly- & Putt, also part of the regen- ton, we once got lost looking for was significant concern the wine to Derby at home, I was sur- tipped sofas and needles (not eration. It was quiet considering the Royal Victoria Park, left do- was still be treaded in the kitch- prised that between us John and the chalk ones the Isle of Wight it was now a sunny weekend, ing circles in Hamble. en. I could muster anything. had promised). The reality was the docile attendant charged us From that harrowing ex- The food and the hospitality After a reassuring cup of tea different – the SRB planned to a very reasonable £1.60 each perience we learnt following were both great, in fact Banjo ex-co-worker Michelle joined us build a proud, safe community to play and £5 deposit on the brown signs is always a good was enamoured with the Span- for the banter, we had a desti- around an area that had previ- clubs; I could emulate Tiger and idea. We ended up at Lakeside ish waitress enough to slip out an nation. I am lucky enough to ously thrived in the 1930s to Colin in my own city. The greens Country Park, which is right audible, “I love you” as we paid have the benefit of the car in 1950s. Some of the facelift it were surprisingly as well kept as next to Wide Lane. Having both the bill. Which was greeted by this expedition, which would has clearly received harks back the ‘state of the art’ toilets in the worked there we were surprised a soul-crushingly non-response ultimately be more unorthodox to that golden age; the shelters car park. John quickly returned that never taken the next en- “Oh.” It was time to take the on foot. Do my carbon footprint have been refurbished and you there after chipping a hole in one trance. We found it was also fridge home, he’d clearly been a favour and recycle this paper can just imagine the overly-clad effort off a tree and onto a 4x4. the home of Eastleigh Lakeside on too long and was emitting after you’ve read it. holiday makers scuttling out. You don’t have to be that good Steam Railway – we seems like harmful things into the environ- Although I doubt they had Ice- to enjoy it, as Michelle and I fin- an ideal place to bring kids, not ment. Weston Cream vans in the 1940’s, we ished a crushing 16 over par. that many students have them. An abrupt halt, but there We were going to Woolston, bought three and took a stroll The fun didn’t stop there, re- Which was one drawback, the ended possibly one of my best the adventure begins. The sun down the windy Weston parade turning my fellow travellers to other being it was closed. days in Southampton, in places came out in partial celebration. and caught a glimpse of the known elements of student-ville, Still early evening there was I’d never seen before. While We crossed the itchen by bridge new lighting and traffic calming planning for my next adventure decent enough light to walk you live here, make the most of (not the Itchen bridge) ventur- measures. In fact, you can now began. In the bright lights and around, the car park was empty, it, discover something new and ing into the unknown. Here we cycle from here all the way to big city, Southampton has it’s although we’d potentially stum- don’t just rot in Portswood. www.wessexscene.co.uk Page 24

Page 28 Sport

www.wessexscene.co.uk Editor’s Lacrosse Ladies longest ever Column Souhtampton University Ladies scored throughout the day Lacrosse Club are now unofficial and the ladies raised well over £1,000 for charity, only suffer- “dreams ing a minor head injury, a broken knuckle and a dislocated shoul- of meeting der in the process! The club ran- So we bring an end to another domly split into two teams, blue year of Sceneing in Wessex. Cheryl Baker and pink, with no discrimination How sad. The good news is against 1st or 2nd team players. that next year you will have the and Kriss The Blue team won 96-84. potent editorial force of myself Akabusi Event co-ordinator Tamsin and Becky Penn! You will be Drake and Club captain Michelle delighted to hear we both play dashed!” Norton would like to thank Will hockey and are both fantabu- Bushell from ProProductions lous umpires so you will get to world record holders, definitely who provided music throughout read blanket coverage of hockey no mean feat when you con- and to the six Vixen cheerlead- and officiating! Hurrah! sider that most of the girls who ers who came along and sup- We bid a fond farewell to played had not even touched a ported the players despite the many a Wessex Legend this is- Charlotte Goward stands tall under pressure lacrosse stick before the begin- heavy rain and winds. sue, we see the last ever Power ning of this academic year. to the People and Issy’s finalAU Tamsin Drake hours, even though the existing A total of 180 goals were sotonlax.co.uk 2 U. I must pass on my thanks to record stands at eight hours and these two for being such a reli- The great and good of ladies’ la- 16 minutes. With a game of this able force and am pleased to say crosse set about trying to break length being totally out of the that next year we will see Rupert the Guinness World Record for question, the ladies dreams of Wharton and Tom Page featur- the longest lacrosse game ever meeting Cheryl Baker and Kriss ing as regular columnists. on May 13. Unfortunately just Akabusi were dashed. The deci- I’d like also to extend my good days before the event was due sion was taken to go ahead with will and thanks to a few people to take place, the ladies were the marathon anyway, in order who have helped with the paper informed by Guinness World to raise money for The Wessex out this year: Faye Dickson has Records that new rules had come Cancer Trust. been a rock and I look forward into play which meant that in or- After nine hours of braving to seeing her pretty smile on der for them to qualify for a new the freezing rain, with only two BBC Sport soon! David Gold has World Record, they would have short breaks to avoid the light- been a regular contributer and to play for a minimum of 24 ning, and a change of pitches, has had some great ideas, next year he will be the Scene2 editor and I think he will really progress the relatively young section. Polo club are proper mint There isn’t enough space to thank everyone that I would like Sophie Scott-Hoad played before university and to but just quickly would like to just to inspire you, Mike Wood say cheers to Phil, Issy, Chris and Polo: a mint sweet, a VW car or started playing three years ago Gareth who have been great this a fast and furious team game having never sat on a horse and year. played on horseback? now plays regularly for this Uni- See you next year! Yes, polo, the sport of Kings, versity and at club level. Queens and Princes (sipping Although stereotypically on Pimm’s) is now available at thought of as a ‘posh’ sport, Southampton. Set up three years everyone is welcome and we ago under the wing of the South- are trying to make polo avail- ampton University Riding Club, able to everyone who wishes to anyone with some hand-eye co- play. It is a great sport; it’s chal- ordination, the ability to ride a lenging: you try swinging a 4ft horse (or the desire to learn) and mallet at a small ball while the a bit of sportsmanship can play horse is going full pelt! Yet it is polo. Most of our players hadn’t immensely satisfying and invig- orating. Once you start it’s easy to get hooked and with funding from the AU we can offer ‘Try it you might like it’ sessions next year to encourage more players league against other universities competition on June 9-10 and at Southampton. We are always such as Bristol and Exeter. Our are hoping to bring back some looking for sponsorship too. teams have had great success in silverware. Polo lessons are offered these competitions, never fin- If you’d like any more infor- weekly throughout the year, ishing in less than 3rd place in mation and want to get involved, Becky Penn innit? one session for teams and one our sections. A team of Natasha our new Polo coordinator tak- for all standards, at Maywood Collings, Laura Greenwood and ing over from Ailsa MacLean is sport Polo near Winchester. Chukkas Sophie Scott-Hoad will be off to Becky Posgate and can be con- @wessexscene.co.uk (matches) are played in the SUPA compete in the SUPA outdoor tacted at: [email protected]. Sport

Page 28 AU Gold rush! 2 U Faye Dickson Southampton University Boa Club enjoyed a golden May Bank Holiday weekend at BUSA This will be my last ever column regatta. The competition, staged for the Wessex Scene! The next at the National Watersports Cen- will be titled something along tre in Nottingham, was the first the lines of ‘Grandad Tells All’, of the regatta season and good but what can I say, it has been a results across the board bode pleasure to chat to you all! Busy well for the upcoming summer times have just spread over the races. in February, but went out in a It was an amazing feeling cross- year’s Senior Men’s squad cap- AU, the ball was fantastic and There were gold medals in the tough semi-final to the eventual ing the line first, but we had to tain George Clarkson stressed just another example of how 500m sprints for SUBC’s Wom- winners. wait for confirmation that we the club’s frustration at this: completely awesome this Union en’s Championship eight and There were some exhilarat- were champions. I had joked “Much credit must go to the is! A big big big sorry goes out Novice four, while the women’s ing races, with the Women’s around that we would win but I guys and girls that they have to Jenny Morris from the riding Championship coxed four came Novice four tying for gold in a never even saw us even getting stuck at training throughout the club, who actually got full co- home with a silver medal. The dead-heat finish in their final. through to the final so being on winter with such little reward. lours but was missed off all the men’s squad also performed well, Gold-medallist Anna Godwin that podium with the medals BUSA has been the turning lists. Well done Jenny! Another narrowly missing out on the po- was ecstatic with the victory: round our necks was unbeliev- point and we hope now, with huge shout out goes to every- dium with fourth place finishes “Being a scratch crew we’d only able!” the summer regatta season on one who won an award or was in the finals of the Fresher eight had two outings before the race It has been a disappointing its way, that there will be lots of even nominated for one, the and Junior pairs races. which was a bit daunting but year for rowing in general with racing to be done on the road to choices were tough and you all The Women’s Novice eight we clubbed together and with a windy conditions leading to the Henley, the pinnacle of the row- have so much to be proud of! prequalified for their event after bit of ‘positive mental attitude’ cancellation of the majority of ing calendar.” Im going to break the mould a a fifth place finish at BUSA head and gave it everything we had. the season’s head races. Next www.subc.co.uk little this time and give you a few highlights of my year. The ladies’ basketball BUSA semi-finals – I was seriously with you every Rifle Club hit title target step of the way and it was an emotional rollercoaster! You are all fabulous! The alumni sports Charlie Asquith medal haul totalled 31, two up day last month, seeing everyone on last year. Many of the team’s come back and spread the Wes- April has without a doubt been successes were recognised re- sex love once more! Reading last the best month ever for the Uni- cently at the AU Ball, in which the week and playing for the netball versity Shooting Team, with top club scooped all four of the half team! Meeting you all at AUGC class results in both team and in- colours nominations it applied when I was so terrified! Down- dividual events. for. Congratulations to Charlie ing a pint from a trophy in Walk- Thriving on last season’s suc- Asquith, Samantha Bull, Richard about after thrashing Solent cesses, the shooting team com- Hemingway and Timothy Keen in the Walkabout Cup! Thurs- peted in the Isle of Man Easter on all their achievements at day mornings and Wednesday Open shoot again this Easter county and international level. nights! AUC, generally, you are against top draw Common- James Paterson was awarded full all absolute stars! The balls, the wealth and GB medallists. To colours and the prestigious Out- celebrations, the achievements top the team’s previous haul of standing Achievement Award. and finally making some amaz- 29 medals seemed impossible, Speaking of his success, James ing new friends. This is just a but magnificent shooting from said: “I feel really proud to have big thank you to each and every James Paterson, Emma Sigour- received this fantastic award. It one of you that I have met this nay and Mark Girling, to name really means a lot. I would like year. You are fabulous! Huge but a few, saw Southampton to thank everyone in the AU for Should probably give Stealth 101 with Rich Hemingway a miss thanks, as ever, go to Kim, Janet shooters top the leader board their outstanding support.” and Hazel. throughout the two-day event. Having lost over half of their hand, some great cohesion de- to the huge level of extra com- Just remember, you all need to James and Mark were ranked BUSA winning team from the veloped in the team and newer mitment to training all members make the most of every moment in first and second positions previous year, the Shooting Team members really began to shine. put in. you have here at Southampton, ahead of double Common- had a struggle on their hands this It was all the more satisfy- Speaking after securing the ti- in Wessex and in the AU. ‘Cause wealth gold medallist Sheena year to train up some top class ing then to see the rebuilt team tle, captain Charlie Asquith said: it’s absolutely awesome! Sharp, British record holder Har- replacements. Having initially perform so outstandingly at the “I am really really proud of eve- ry Creevy and Commonwealth performed disappointingly in annual BUSA Championships at ryone. There were no heroes this silver medallist Neil Stirton go- the postal league, the club was Appleton. Every single member year, just some brilliant shooting ing into the Olympic-style fi- forced to move up a number of of the team shot a fantastic score from every single member of nal, James having qualified in gears in its training programme to secure one of the most pleas- the team. How we can possibly the hardest wind conditions of to begin realising the impressive ing victories the team has ever improve next year I don’t know Issy xxx the day. Club president Emma results it has come to expect in had. Crowned BUSA Champi- but the B-team also had some Sigournay enjoyed similar suc- BUSA. With additional outdoor ons for the fourth year running, impressive scores so our sights cess achieving fantastic scores in training at 50m and 100yds, this year’s fantastic achievement are set on coming first AND sec- some tricky conditions. The team and with coach Mary Maiden on was even more outstanding due ond next year!.” Sport

www.wessexscene.co.uk SportRec answer some big questions

Alan Lofthouse are charged as students to use the pitches. It’s the income from It’s a battle that has been fought this that subsidies our member- since the beginning of time, the ship fees (to the tune of approxi- skint students vs the ‘big, evil’ mately £300,000 a year, or £27 SportRec department. To some per member in 2005/06). extent this was my view; all I wanted was to play a few games Q. What about qualified ref- of rugby but the SportRec de- erees? Are we covered by the partment wanted to empty my insurance without them? bank accounts for the privilege. I told myself it was time for ac- A. For intra-mural games Spor- tion: I requested details of their tRec has opted against to pre- accounts and a meeting was ar- vent further costs to the stu- ranged with the Director of Busi- dents. However, they are cov- ness and Community Services ered by the insurance that comes (B&CS) and SportRec to discuss with their SportRec membership. all the concerns I had myself and With student referees the game from other sports teams. is more relaxed and fun. With an Armed with questions, and World Wedgie Championships official referee students that get the Student Union and AU of the story you find the students lee Sports Hall. The department are wet. Work is underway yellow and red cards would need Presidents, Ben Rogers and Issy and SportRec both fighting for also wants to encourage those with tests having been carried to be fined and disciplined in the Gross, I went into battle. the same goal: good facilities for people wishing to play sport to out and results expected any same way professional players At this point I have a confes- everyone at the lowest cost to increase their fitness, which an day now to see if the ground would be, thus costing more to sion; I crumbled quicker than a students. To address some of the all-inclusive card will do. Also, is suitable to start installing the the student in the long run. With fresher in Jesters. In my defence, main points of the meeting: from a business point of view, same drainage techniques used rugby, a qualified ref is a must; it was hard to argue any points the current facilities cannot be at the Millennium Stadium in as such, SportRec is offering free once both sides of the story Q. Why can’t there be a tiered improved if membership income Cardiff. Obviously due to the places on a course for any vol- were in the open. One of the system for people that just want falls. 60% of students currently cost, this will take place gradu- unteers with the provision you main problems I encountered is to play the odd game on the own a SportRec card which ally. In the mean time there are then help referee some of the actually down to the students; Wide Lane grounds or as part of shows it must be good value talks of converting unused areas intra-mural games. there are lots of Chinese whis- their society? for money. When it becomes of Wide Lane into more train- pers and rumours which only too expensive then students will ing grids and operating a rota- contain half-truths. The main A. The outdoor facilities actu- vote with their feet and leave. tion scheme to try and keep the Sport in reason for this? Us penny-pinch- ally cost more to run than the grounds open longer. This year ing students wanting more (it is indoor facilities (second only to Q. How much is SportRec mem- the students have lucked out a Brief what we do best!), and a lack of the swimming pool in a meter bership going to be next year? little with the excessive rainfall communication from SportRec by meter comparison, although and the current failing drainage to the students about what is Wide Lane is obviously much A. As part of a five-year business system (if in doubt, add more going on and how our money is larger), so a tiered system would plan implemented by SportRec, sand!), however the grounds being spent. actually disadvantage those the price of membership is go- will only get better from now This is why I am writing this wanting to just use Wide Lane ing to slowly increase instead of on. With regard to Wellington, Outgoing AU President Issy article. When you see both sides and not the facilities in the Jubi- having had huge leap, in ocntrast the pitches were much better, Gross has been exposed as a to a few years ago. This would but this was because they were fraud and is in fact a 56 stone have cost current students up to closed more often to preserve man called Steffan Glutenberg, £130 more in the long run. The their condition - they were just the real Issy we know and love is price next year is set to increase as prone to flooding as Wide a homeless Polish lady paid forty by approximately £7.50. While Lane is. three pence a day to masquer- this sounds bad as it’s a further ade as Gross. increase on the price, it is only Q. What about all the kids from because of the five-year plan Eastleigh using our pitches be- Pippa Susskind has been named that the price is slowly increas- cause of Eastleigh Council’s World Tiddly Winks champion, ing and didn’t just leap to £100 contribution to the grounds? leading to headlines such as when the Jubilee Centre was ‘Tiddle my winkle’ and ‘Wink till completed. A. Eastleigh Council did give you pipp’. the University £1millon towards Q. A lot of students are a little Wide Lane. However, this was Harriet Mellish destroyed Stags upset about the quality of the not as a shared purchase, they Head Bar Manager Simon New- pitches at Wide Lane due to have no more rights than any bold in the first ever SUSU UFC being constantly waterlogged. other third party to the grounds. match: Cage Rage, winning in What is being done about it, The reason for the contribution 19.43 and why did we sell our old was to maintain their ‘green Wellington ground? space’ in the town under Govern- Simon Roberts won the 22nd ment guidelines. So the £1mil- annual Wessex Bi-Centurion in A. Drainage has been an issue lon was actually just a present! Clown on May 9. This makes and SportRec are aware of it. In reality, where possible, most him the first man to ever win The main problem isn’t neces- of the off-peak training slots are two in succession and overall. sarily the rain, but the destruc- offered to local residents and Steer clear of Kathy Reed’s backhand, it hurts tion of the pitches when they teams at a price more than we sport.susu.org Page 28 Sport

www.wessexscene.co.uk POWER Home at last to the After a wait of nearly seven years, football has returned to Wembley bubbly hand-wash worthy of a through the turnstiles. However, people hotel. its construction must be seen as Once in our seats, even my a lesson ahead of London 2012. Now that we’re the sunny side 6’5” companion was compli- Even at this opener, 4,000 fans of the Easter holidays, my con- menting the extensive legroom failed to receive their tickets and tribution to the AU increases we were provided with and couldn’t sort the issue out be- from getting drunk on Wednes- ‘Three Lions’ echoed round the cause of jammed phone-lines, day evenings to playing cricket stands, expectation billowing while the demand for tickets in between getting drunk on round the stadium like a caul- when they initially went on sale Wednesday evenings. I’ve found dron about to bubble over. forced the FA’s website to crash that mixing booze and sport of- The game lived up to the oc- due to excess demand. ten leads to underperforming in casion and those lucky enough Many thought the home of both and this has led me to won- to have secured tickets were in English football should be out- der; who is the greatest sporting for an end-to-end display, wit- side London in the more acces- boozer of all time? nessing a thrilling 3-3 draw and sible Birmingham or Coventry, Football’s top three were a far more positive display by and leaving the stadium was a George Best, Paul Gascoigne the national side than their sen- nightmare even with 60,000 and Paul McGrath. George Best ior counterparts would put on in rather than the capacity 90,000 – God rest his soul – carried on Tel Aviv later that evening. spectators present. Wembley boozing on his second liver, Faye Dickson the world had already become has history though: the turf, which is clearly evidence of not a landmark before its opening “I momentarily concrete and red plastic seats knowing when to stop, so he is The curtain was finally raised at with its dominating arch, span- may be new and the players not getting the crown. Gazza the controversial new Wembley ning 1,033 feet, characterising considered may have to climb more steps to was a footballing genius who stadium in March as thousands its extravagant architecture. reach the Royal Box, but it’s still was partial to the odd binge but emerged onto a packed Wem- The occasion for the grand becoming the the spot where Bobby Moore it got him into trouble too often bley Way to witness one of the re-opening was an Under-21 lifted the Jules Rimet trophy for to earn the label ‘greatest of all most talked about constructions international between England first streaker England, and the site of many time’. When Paul McGrath was in recent years. Extremely under- and Italy, a friendly exercise at the new FA Cup memories and interna- at Villa he couldn’t train because estimated costs and time-span ahead of the European Cham- tional dramas. of a bad knee injury, and so he had led to delays and heavy pionships in Holland this sum- stadium” Wembley is a breathtaking boozed all week before turning criticism, yet finally Wembley mer. Not the sort of fixture that setting worthy of hosting cup in performances each Saturday was ready to refill its position would normally attract a sell-out I momentarily considered at- finals for years to come. The that earned him the 1993 PFA as the home of English football crowd, but a necessary one to tempting to get my own name more pressing matter is whether Players’ Player of the Year award at the heart of a sport-obsessed pass safety regulations before in the record books by becom- McClaren’s men are worthy of and the nickname ‘God’. How- nation. hosting the FA Cup final in May. ing the first streaker at the new setting foot on the pristine turf ever, he didn’t have enough suc- The last official match at the It was quite evident that no-one stadium, but my brother, who after their dire recent perform- cess to be called ‘the greatest’. stadium had been in September was really there for the match had accompanied me to the ances. Let’s just hope they can Cricket has given us Shane 2000 when, against a backdrop itself but for the opportunity to game, warned me in no uncer- rise to the big occasion playing Warne, Phil Tufnell, Ian Botham of rain, England were miserably be among the first to experience tain terms that he would never there and set our worries aside and the inebriated pedalo steal- defeated by Germany in what the much-anticipated structure, speak to me again if I attempted by qualifying for Euro 2008... ing Freddie Flintoff, but the pick should have been a glorious camera phones at the ready, and such a feat. of the bunch, and in my view the goodbye to the old Twin Tow- it didn’t disappoint. So the stadium impressed, greatest sporting boozer of all ers. Instead it instigated the res- The stadium’s interior remains but to the extent of £800m? It’s time, was David Boon. You may ignation of Kevin Keegan and eerily perfect in a sanitised air- a home to be proud of, but so not have heard of him, but he the beginning of the Sven-era, a port-sense, and I almost felt is Cardiff’s Millennium stadium, was an Australian cricketer who period of disappointing undera- guilty for discarding my plastic which cost a fraction of Wem- prepared for totally dominating chievement. cup as litter for one of the count- bley’s budget at £150m and England in the 1989 Ashes series less cleaners to sweep away. At took only three years to build. by drinking 52 cans of beer on “Wembley £3.50 a pint though, you’d hard- Hopefully though, Wembley will the flight from Sydney to Lon- ly expect Jesters’ drinking condi- give back to the public, perhaps don. He reasoned with coaching has been tions. A burger and chips at £8 is by securing the 2018 World staff that his actions were down hardly a bargain either, although Cup and/or a future Champions to his fear of flying and went on rebuilt into a they lived up to their billing as League final, as well as host- to score more than 500 runs in the finest food I’ve ever tasted ing sports at London 2012. Al- the six matches. fine sporting at a match. though, building venues for the This is the last ‘Power to the colosseum” After the horror stories that Olympics will be another matter People’ you will ever read. I emerged from the toilets of the - if it takes seven years to get hope you’ve enjoyed them – I Almost seven years and former Wembley, it is a stark one stadium ready, surely we’re don’t get much feedback – but £800m later, Wembley has contrast to be greeted with behind schedule already?! I can’t be the only one who been rebuilt into a fine sporting short, if any, queues (although It seems futile to be negative would rather read lighthearted colosseum, fit to host not only admittedly football stadiums when Wembley is such a fine sports-based banter than the the finest gladiators in today’s are one of the few spaces the sporting venue, among, if not pretentious crap you get in ‘The game but 90,000 supporters in queue for the gents might be THE, best in the world, and its Edge’. Thanks for reading. comfort and luxury. The most longer than that for the ladies at doubters will be just as overcome expensive football stadium in half time), and treated to luxury with awe as I was upon coming Power BUSA Glory for Wessex Scene: News - AU Clubs Winchester of Discontent wessexSPORT Varsity, la la la!

Simon Webb The team’s third place finish Just as football and hockey con- is hotly disputed. Due to some were blighted by organisational sistently per- For the first time ever Southamp- rather poorly organised fix- issues the netball was too. Nine formed at a good ton University participated in a ture lists the team were unable teams were scheduled to com- level and were fa- South Coast Varsity. Hosted by to play thier final two fixtures, pete across two groups, on the vourites heading Reading University a number of which were against the teams day however Southampton and into the event.’ Wessex teams headed to Read- placed 6th and 7th overall at the Reading brought two teams Badminton fin- ing on May 3 and prepared to time. The cancellation denied and Winchester and Bath Spa ished second be- do battle with the likes of Bath the team six points that they be- brought one each. To acco- hind Reading, The Spa, Winchester, Sussex and lieve would have enabled them modate this change the clubs club put in a strong Reading Universities. to win overall. agreed to a round robin event performance but The day got off to a good Southampton hockey were which inevitably saw Southamp- came unstuck in the smile start as the teams all departed asked to provide two teams and ton 1st team play against thier final round as they b a c k on time and were greeted by after a shock loss by Southamp- own 2nd team. faced Reading on her bright sunshine and some Read- ton Bs to Winchester it soon be- Just as SUSU Vice-President in a showdown face as ing University reps who were came clear that Southampton (Media & Communications) Phil for the trophy. the ‘Bar eager to show the teams to thier As and Winchester were the two Webb made his debut for foot- Senior club S p o r t s ’ changing facilities. strongest sides. ball at Reading, the netball club member Toby began. Kushner, VP Welfare & Socie- A three stage event started ties, said: “the team performed with a four person relay Cake brilliantly but couldn’t quite pull Eating Race, followed by a four it out of the bag against such person boat race and finally strong opposition.” a break dancing competition. Overall Southampton lost Winchester headed home early by three points to Reading, 48 due to exam and dissertation points to 45. There were cries of commitments but the remain- ‘fix’ from the Southampton clubs ing Universities did battle as well but it was down to Southamp- as a sabatical team made up of ton Athletic Union that they did Athletic Union Presidents from not win overall. Failing to bring each University. mens and ladies rugby teams de- The eating competition was prived Southampton of a poten- won by Bath Spa but a late surge tial 20 points. Mens rugby were by Southampton saw the inevi- unavailable for comment but it table victory for Wessex. seems there was a communica- The boat race started off tion error between ladies rugby stronly with John Urwin de- and the AU as Club Captain stroying his pint and ended Netball - a winning streak Kate Nicholls stated that with Andrew Saudners Jr they only heard about the clocking in at 2.3 seconds It was not long before the A flurry of goals from Su- welcomed AU President Issy event two days before to win the boat race. It all competition started and it be- sie Hunt and Becky Kettle shot Gross and Ski Club President departure. came down to the break came clear early on that the Southampton to the final. Win- Naomi Avery into thier number Despite the dancing competition. standard was high and that it chester were humiliated as as the two put on the Wessex close loss Following some body was between Southampton, Southampton opted not to field colours and competed as mem- the teams p o p p i n g Reading and Winchester to bat- a goal keeper and still ran out 3- bers of the Netball 2nd team, e n j o y e d by Rupert tle out for the over all winners 0 winners. dutiful fellow sabbaticals eagerly a fantas- W h a r t o n , trophy. The netball team provided supported on the sidelines. tic evening in Jo Robinson and The mens footall club were another Southampton victory. Ladies football ran out domi- Reading’s stu- Naomi Avery each unfortunate to finish third overall The girls entered two teams and nant winners in thier competi- dent union. Issy performed an indi- out of seven. Despite some well both turned out great perform- tion. The club eased to vicotry Gross was unable vidual skill and the structured passing movements ances, the 1st team winning with a very strong squad and to hide her dis- judgment was unan- they were unable to convert and every game, and the 2nd team it came as no surprise to Gross appointment at imous as Southamp- like many teams struggled under winning three and picking up when she was informed of thier losing so narrow- ton won 2-1 over the intense heat of hte sun. one loss and one draw. victory, ‘The ladies football have ly but soon had a Bath Spa. www.wessexscene.co.uk