OR GThe OR G A S M AA N S W E R G U I D E SM This page intentionally left blank OR The ORGASM ANSWER GUIDE Barry R. Komisaruk Beverly Whipple GSara NasserzadehA Carlos Beyer-Flores SMThe Johns Hopkins University Press | Baltimore © 2010 The Johns Hopkins University Press All rights reserved. Published 2010 Printed in the United States of America on acid-free paper 2 4 6 8 9 7 5 3 1 The Johns Hopkins University Press 2715 North Charles Street Baltimore, Maryland 21218-4363 www.press.jhu.edu Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data The orgasm answer guide / Barry R. Komisaruk … [et al.]. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references. ISBN-13: 978-0-8018-9395-7 (hardcover : alk. paper) ISBN-10: 0-8018-9395-X (hardcover : alk. paper) ISBN-13: 978-0-8018-9396-4 (pbk. : alk. paper) ISBN-10: 0-8018-9396-8 (pbk. : alk. paper) 1. Orgasm—Popular works. I. Komisaruk, Barry R. QP251.O74 2009 613.9'6—dc22 2009009804 A catalog record for this book is available from the British Library. Special discounts are available for bulk purchases of this book. For more information, please contact Special Sales at 410-516-6936 or [email protected]. The Johns Hopkins University Press uses environmentally friendly book materials, includ- ing recycled text paper that is composed of at least 30 percent post-consumer waste, when- ever possible. All of our book papers are acid-free, and our jackets and covers are printed on paper with recycled content. Contents Preface xiii One About Orgasms What are orgasms? 1 Do men and women have the same sensations during an orgasm? 2 Why don’t all my orgasms feel the same? 4 What are multiple orgasms? 5 What is anorgasmia? 5 At what age do orgasms begin? 7 Do orgasms end at a certain age? 8 v CONTENTS How long does it take to reach orgasm? 8 How long do orgasms normally last? 9 How often do people experience orgasm? 10 Does a person inherit the ability to have orgasms? 11 Are there really “nongenital” orgasms? 12 Why do people sometimes look as if they are in pain at or near orgasm? 15 Two Women’s Orgasms What’s the diff erence between vaginal, cervical, and clitoral orgasms? 17 Does breast or nipple stimulation aff ect a woman’s orgasm? 18 Do Kegel exercises intensify female orgasms? 18 What fl uids are produced before and during a woman’s orgasm? 20 Why is the clitoris so sensitive after an orgasm? 22 Does body position during sex aff ect a woman’s orgasm? 23 Does penis size aff ect a woman’s orgasm? 24 vi CONTENTS Are orgasms aff ected by the menstrual cycle? 24 Is a woman more likely to become pregnant if she has an orgasm? 26 Is it safe to have orgasms during pregnancy? 27 Does childbirth aff ect orgasm? 27 How do hormones aff ect women’s orgasms? 29 Three Men’s Orgasms How does a penis become erect? 33 How do men ejaculate? 35 Does a penis need to be hard to have an orgasm? 37 Why is the penis so sensitive after an orgasm? 37 Can a man have an orgasm without stimulation of his penis? 38 Can men experience ejaculation without orgasm, or orgasm without ejaculation? 38 Why do some men become so sleepy after an orgasm? 39 What is the clear fl uid that comes out of the penis before ejaculation? 41 vii CONTENTS What is the diff erence between semen and sperm? 42 Why does semen change from opaque to transparent? 43 What causes diff erences in the amount and characteris- tics of semen ejaculated? 44 How do hormones aff ect men’s orgasms? 44 Four Hows and Whys of Orgasm How do legal and illegal drugs aff ect orgasm? 49 Why do people sometimes experience orgasms while asleep? 53 Why do people say that orgasms happen in the brain? 54 How does “sex-change” (“transsexual”) surgery aff ect orgasms? 55 How do machines and devices stimulate orgasms? 57 How can scientists tell whether animals have orgasms? 60 viii CONTENTS Five Orgasms and Health Are orgasms good for our health? 63 Do orgasms reduce stress? 66 Can an orgasm cause a heart attack? 67 Can orgasms cause headaches? 68 What causes “blue balls”? 70 What is the eff ect of cancer and its treatment on orgasm? 72 Does hysterectomy aff ect orgasms? 74 Besides hysterectomy, do other female genital surgeries aff ect orgasms? 75 Does prostate surgery aff ect orgasms? 76 Besides prostate surgery, do other male genital surgeries aff ect orgasms? 77 Are there surgeries that can improve a man’s chance of experiencing orgasm? 77 How do brain injuries or spinal cord injuries aff ect orgasms? 79 What treatments are there for erectile dysfunction? 82 Does Viagra help women experience orgasm? 87 ix CONTENTS Does vaginal dryness aff ect orgasms? 87 What causes premature ejaculation? 90 How do I have an orgasm while practicing safer sex? 92 Can I get HIV/AIDS and other STIs from oral sex? 94 Does diet aff ect orgasms? 95 Six The Geography of the Female Orgasm What is the clitoris? 97 What is the cervix? 98 What is the G spot? 98 What is the U spot? 101 What is the A spot? 102 What are the vaginal fornices? 102 x CONTENTS Seven Orgasms and Relationships How can I stimulate or intensify orgasms in myself or my partner? 103 How can I tell whether my partner is faking an orgasm? 104 How can my partner and I have simultaneous orgasms? 105 Why does my partner use a vibrator to have an orgasm? 106 What can I do if my partner says he can’t have an orgasm because my vagina is not tight enough? 106 What can I do if my partner says she isn’t having orgasms because my penis is too small? 107 Why does my partner want to have an orgasm through anal sex? 108 Why does my partner need me to “talk dirty” in order to have an orgasm? 109 What can we do if my partner or I can’t experience orgasms? 110 xi CONTENTS Eight Orgasms and Culture Do diff erent cultures view orgasms diff erently? 113 Does female genital cutting aff ect orgasms? 114 Does male circumcision aff ect orgasms? 117 Does piercing aff ect orgasms? 117 Does “dry sex” aff ect orgasms? 119 Is there too much emphasis on “achieving” orgasm in some cultures? 119 Why can’t people talk about orgasms without feeling embarrassed or silly? 120 Selected References 123 xii Preface When you work in the fi eld of sexual health, you are asked a lot of questions. Sometimes you know the answer, sometimes you need to call on colleagues for advice. This book is a combination of our knowledge and the assistance we have received from many people. We are grate- ful to all those who have posed questions to us throughout the years and especially to the following people, who helped us before and dur- ing the writing of this book: Rachel Abrams, John Bancroft, Edwin Belzer, Wendy Birbano, Karen Brash-McGreer, Maria Cruz Rodriguez del Cerro, Arlene Feldman, Eleni Frangos, David Goldmeier, Gabriela Gonzalez-Mariscal, Cynthia Graham, Serin Kelami, Harvey Kliman, Roy Levin, Christine McGinn, Angelica Montiel-Breton, Michael Perelman, Martha Rivera, Jay Rosenblatt, Kenneth Ray Stubbs, Alexander Tsiaras, Mary Ann Ulrich, Nan Wise, and Kevan Wylie. Without their assistance, this book would never have been possible. We also acknowledge, with special thanks, our editor, Vincent J. Burke, for his continuous encouragement, support, thoughtfulness, and expert advice and help. We off er our sincere gratitude to Linda Strange, our copyeditor, for her excellent unruffl ing of our text. We think the diversity of our professional and personal backgrounds helps make the book both readable and comprehensive. Professionally, xiii PREFACE among the four authors we have some level of expertise in virtually every aspect of sexual health related to orgasm. Personally, we are a diverse religious and cultural mix—Christian, Jewish, and Muslim; American, Middle Eastern, and Mexican. After numerous conversations among the four of us, we settled on eighty or so questions that represent what we think you are curious about. Some of our answers are brief, others more detailed. We tried to answer the questions without getting bogged down in scientifi c de- tails, but we also tried not to leave out important information--even if it meant including the occasional medical term. We tested the manuscript on both experts and non-experts and, we hope, have produced a book that satisfi es both groups. Researching and writing a book takes you away from the ones you love for far too many hours of the day. For their understanding and support, Barry thanks his sons, Adam and Kevin, and, in remembrance, his wife, Carrie. Beverly thanks her husband, Jim, children, Allen and Susan, and grandchildren, Kayla, Travis, Valerie, William, and Elyse. Sara thanks her husband, Pejman Azarmina. Carlos thanks his wife, Josefi na, and daughters, Maria Emilia and Gaby. xiv OR GThe OR G A S M AA N S W E R G U I D E SM This page intentionally left blank One About Orgasms What are orgasms? As simple as this question sounds, and as obvious as the answer may seem to most of us, defi ning “orgasm” can prove diffi cult. In some ways, it is as diffi cult to defi ne “orgasm” as it is to describe how something tastes.