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PIXELNine “ Does anyone set out to be a troll?„ Edited and published monthly by David Burton CONTENTS 5227 Emma Drive, Lawrence IN 46236-2742 E-mail: [email protected] Cover: photograph by David Lewton Distributed in a PDF version only. Available for downloading at efanzines.com thanks to Bill Burns. 3 Notes From Byzantium A Noah Count Press Publication. column by Eric Mayer Compilation copyright © 2006 by David Burton. 6 Much Nothings About Ado Copyright reverts to individual contributors on publication. column by Lee Lavell AMDG 9 Whither Fandom? Editorial deadline for Pixel Ten: January 20, 2007. column by Some portions of Eric’s column are reprinted from his blog at www.journalscape/ericmayer 15 Found In Collection Dave Locke’s “I Feel A Draft” was first published in Yandro February 1973. column by Christopher Garcia 17 I Feel A Draft humor by Dave Locke Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to Pixel readers and contributors! 20 Being Frank reviews by Peter Sullivan 22 Pixelated lettercolumn

PIXEL NINE 2 JANUARY 2007 Noottes FFroomm Byzantiuum Eric Mayer Illustrated by Brad Foster

Writing In The Holidays Christmases of which I had no experience, When I was publishing a I often One the many things I don’t like about the the sort of thing that makes for the best included a holiday piece, or an appropriate holiday season is that readers seem to ex- sentimentality. Sappy sentiments which cover. Once I did a drawing of Santa’s sleigh pect something with a seasonal theme. Or would sound laughable in July are what’s being pulled through the air by bats. maybe writers (or writers like me, to be wanted at Christmas, like the gaudy lights Writing a column for a fanzine I guess I more precise) just think that readers natu- no one (or almost no one) would consider should no longer feel quite so constrained. rally want some holiday words. stringing all over their house in the sum- For me that’s a problem because I dread mer. the holidays. No other time of year is so filled with the ghosts of people who are no longer here. I suppose it’s perfectly appropri- ate that Christmas practically starts with Halloween these days. I always used to tie the column I wrote for the local weekly to the holiday. Even at Christmas that wasn’t a problem because I was just out of high school and about the only ghosts casting shadows over the col- ored lights were those of departed pets. I tended to turn out some sentimental tripe about the virtues of old fashioned

PIXEL NINE 3 JANUARY 2007 Weighty Matters costs. I learned the hard way to avoid stamp. He informed me that the addition of While browsing the web the other day I was sending my zine out on rainy days. I a stamp had pushed the letter into the next surprised by an advertisement, just in time might have been mailing a Christmas is- weight category. (Apparently nuclear physi- for the holiday season: “Save time and mon- sue because it was just the sort of wet, bit- cists could use post office scales to weigh ey with a postage meter.” ter day you often get at the beginning of atomic particles.) Considering the extent to which email and December. I trudged through the steady This strikes me as wrong. Surely you other sorts of electronic transfers have su- drizzle to the post office with a bag full of shouldn’t have to pay to mail the stamp? If perseded snail mail, a postage meter seemed pre-stamped . The clerk plopped a you take the stamp’s weight into account a peculiar thing to advertise on the web. zine on the scale and chided me for not then you’re not paying so many cents per Like advertising a reed pen in a typewriter having enough postage. When I protested ounce but so many cents per ounce, minus shop, or advertising a typewriter in a com- that a single stamp had been sufficient for the weight of the stamp. puter store. six sheets before, the clerk explained that Maybe I should have asked the clerk to let During that ancient epoch when I mailed might be true on a sunny day; thanks to the glue on the back of the stamp dry off out my dittoed and hectoed personalzine the rain the paper was probably heavier and try weighing it again. (Moisture you Groggy I never owned my own postage me- than usual, having absorbed moisture see...) Or maybe I should have put the ter. Calculation of mailing costs was far too from the air. stamp on at home and let the glue dry on risky a stunt to try at home. I resolved to check for inclement weath- the way to the post office. Then again, the The basics were easy enough. For one er before mailing and certainly never clerk moistened stamps on a damp sponge. stamp I could mail six pages of standard mailed my zines the same day I printed Who’s to say spit wouldn’t weight more? weight duplicator paper held together with them, soggy off the press. Considering the condition of some of the two staples. (Since my finances were such Whether any of my zines arrived with zines I received, I wonder if the rates that I tended spend a lot of time searching deficient postage thanks to a stray gobbet should’ve been based not on what was sent under the sofa cushions for the extra quarter of hecto jelly clinging to the cover I can’t but what actually arrived. I sometimes got a I needed to buy a six-pack, my zines were say. few scraps of torn paper in a plastic bag. I limited to six pages) After that, though, it Moisture in the air wasn’t the only hur- guess I was lucky I wasn’t charged for got complicated. If you think taking the dle to be overcome, however. There was postage due for the weight of the bag. Or for number of staples into account was cutting the time the clerk weighed a well stuffed the weight of the postage due stamp. things too fine, think again. envelope, stuck on the appropriate stamp, Even the humidity could affect mailing weighed it again and added a second

PIXEL NINE 4 JANUARY 2007 An Advent Calendar even if I did know how the story ended. times a limited palette is best. Plain blue for When I was very young my parents brought Years later I bought advent calendars example. out an advent calendar on the first of De- for my own kids. The only ones I could Lights along the edge of the roof, draped cember. Each night before being tucked into find had chocolates behind the doors. The over the snow heaped rhododendrons in bed, I opened one of the twenty-four doors kids seemed to like them well enough but front of the house and the small hemlock at the end of the driveway cast a blue glow cut into the nativity scene on the calendar. to me those calendars just weren’t the over the snowy yard. Through the blue A short sentence and a small line drawing same. With chocolates you know pretty framed picture window could be seen the behind each door told a bit of the familiar much what you’re getting. Words offer blue bedecked tree in the living room. The Christmas story – the journey of Mary and more possibilities, whether hidden behind effect was striking. But not exactly merry. Joseph, the star over Bethlehem, the wise the doors of advent calendars or inside Compared to the other houses along the men who traveled from the east – culminat- books. street decked out in cheerful motley ours ap- ing on the last night in the birth of Jesus peared sunk in a pit of gloom, depressing as which heralded the arrival of . Blue Light Special old black and white Ebeneezer Scrooge in It sounds crass to put it like that but I was My dad was an artist and a good one. His the yearly telecast of “A Christmas Carol.” only a kid. Santa was easier to believe in watercolors won awards at juried shows, than Jesus. The concept of a jolly fellow So for a few years I had a blue, blue museums purchased his work and he was Christmas, just like Elvis. He didn’t sound who left gifts for well behaved children was even featured in American Artist. Undeni- pleased about it though and neither was I. simpler to grasp than the idea of someone ably, he had a fine aesthetic sense. Which Luckily my Dad’s blue period, like Picas- who suffered and died for our sins, whatever is not necessarily what kids are looking so’s, didn’t last forever. At some point, for those were. And the reward for belief in for at Christmas. Santa was more tangible. You can’t sled some reason (maybe my mother protested) I’m thinking in particular of the blue colored lights returned. Although we cer- down the hill behind the house on eternal lights. One year Dad decided that strings tainly never had an illuminated Santa or salvation. of multicolored holiday lights were a bit plastic reindeer on the roof, sad to say. There’s no doubt that the countdown to garish if not downright tasteless. If lights Dad passed away two years ago, just be- Christmas gifts excited me, but there was had to be displayed – a practice of ques- fore the holidays. If he were here to do it, I’d also something magical about those words tionable artistic merit to begin with – then be happy to have him put up the blue lights waiting to be discovered behind the doors, at least they should be tasteful. Some- again. •

PIXEL NINE 5 JANUARY 2007 Muucchh NNootthhiinggss About AAdo Lee Lavell

Feliz Navidad…I think stage children danced. From above the whack, whack! Nothing. Backstage the Of the many memories I have concerning stage were hung a couple of large piñatas teachers were beginning to get panicky. teaching, some of the various programs we filled with brightly colored confetti. After Running around they found a couple of mop put on stand out. I should like to recount the the song was over, while the piano was handles and handed them out to the chil- tale of one of them right now, in honor of still playing, the children on stage were to dren on stage. Two or three children held the Christmas season. break the piñatas with yardsticks and the handles together and swung with all Back in those olden days the school where pointers that they had been given. When their might. Wham wham wham! The deter- I taught gave an annual Christmas Program, the piñatas broke the children were to cel- mined looks had been replaced by those of as did most schools, for the December PTA ebrate with “Oles” and the curtain would rage. The children, with fierce scowls, were meeting. The theme for that particular year close. hitting them with every ounce of strength was Christmas Around the World and each Sounds nice and simple, right? Unfortu- that they had. The piñatas began to swing grade level, kindergarten through six, was to nately things did not go quite as smoothly wildly on the twine but not a crack was ap- participate. The program was “created” and as had been anticipated. The piñatas had pearing. Finally, after one massive whack, directed by the music teacher. The first been made by the school art teacher who the twine on one of the piñatas broke and it grade portion of the program was to center had gotten carried away in the strength of came crashing down upon the stage with a on Christmas in Mexico. It was to go as fol- the papier mâché. Thus, when the children resounding thud, still unbroken. The chil- lows: Around a dozen first graders were to hit them with their sticks it barely moved dren jumped back stunned. This was not be on stage dressed in cobbled together them from the twine from which they what they had been told would happen. Mexican-style costumes (this was not a well- were hanging. The children swung at They moved around it, wondering if they to-do neighborhood, so we had to make do them harder and they began to sway should hit it again. Fortunately the audience with what we could) as a first grade choir slightly. Determined looks began to ap- decided that this was the climax and began stood along the walls to sing, while the on- pear on the children’s faces. Whack, applauding. The children looked up, some-

PIXEL NINE 6 JANUARY 2007 what bewildered, then decided everything fluid and periodically have their flints re- Milk was delivered to your door. It came was all right after all and jumped up and placed. in bottles and was not homogenized. Bread down, yelling, “Yay!” and forgetting all Most movies were black and white. The was also delivered. Doctors made house about the oles, while the curtain closed. screens were square. There were many calls. Quarantine signs were put on houses After the program the piñatas were neighborhood theaters. When TV came in for measles and scarlet fever. There were no thrown into the trash and carried off to the the screens were small but were housed in antibiotics, but sulfa was around. The dump where, sometime in far future, some huge consoles. They were all black and anesthetic was ether. archaeologists will discover them and won- white. There was no cable. Just “rabbit der what these impermeable objects contain ears” and roof antennas to bring in the that had to be so important that they were few networks and local stations. protected so carefully. Distance travel was mostly by train, bus, or car. Air travel was a luxury and quite The Times They Are A-Changing expensive. They were all prop jobs, no jets. Local mass transport here was by In celebration of this New Year I shall now streetcars, which ran on rails and had an- proceed to look backward as to how things tennae that connected them to overhead used to be, at least where I lived. electrical wires. was that “crazy Buck White Castle was one of the very few Rogers stuff.” It existed mostly in pulp mag- fast food restaurants. azines which cost from fifteen cents to a All women were “homemakers” and quarter. Does anyone remember Sergeant couldn’t even get credit under their own Saturn and his cohorts Snaggletooth, Wart- name if they were married. Women sel- ears and Frogeyes? The prozines ran fanzine dom wore slacks and never for dress. review columns. Neighborhood theaters ran kiddie mati- The first computers, like ENIAC, were gi- nees, where it cost about a dime to get in. gantic room-sized things. No one even They always featured some sort of action dreamed of the transistor or PCs or the In- serial. ternet. NASCAR didn’t exist. Open wheel race- Comic books cost a dime, although there cars were incredibly dangerous. There were occasional fifteen cent or quarter spe- were no old race drivers. There were no cials. women drivers. In fact, women were not Smoking was considered glamorous and even allowed in the pits. sophisticated. Cigarette lighters were not Does anyone remember ice cream disposable but had to be refilled with lighter sodas? Green stamps? Zoot suits? Victory Gardens?

PIXEL NINE 7 JANUARY 2007 Refrigerators were “ice boxes” literally, of the coal type and had to be filled and Random Thoughts and the “ice man cameth.” When refrigera- stoked periodically. Coal was stored in a Signs can be interesting and amusing. There tors first came in the freezers were tiny with coal bin in the basement. are a group of stores in Indianapolis carry- only enough room for ice cube trays. Cars did not have safety belts, air bags ing the name “Party and Sickroom A healthy breakfast included a couple of and all the other safety features. Most Supplies.” I guess they are catering to people eggs (usually fried), whole milk, buttered were standard transmission. Automatic who like to be ready for all contingencies. toast and bacon, sausage or ham. transmission was a big luxury. Most cars Once, when visiting a friend at a local In the newspapers women were never were black. The tires had inner tubes and hospital, I was on the elevator to her floor raped; they were “criminally assaulted.” blowouts were common. when the cab stopped on the way to let Schools were segregated. Neighborhoods Telephones did not have pushbuttons. someone exit. I stared out at a sign on the were segregated. In fact, almost everything They did not even have dials. You had to opposing wall which read “Pediatrics – No was segregated. pick up the earpiece and talk to “Central” children allowed.” I presume the doctors on Mad was a comic book and had a compan- (the central operator for the area) to get that floor had a lot of time to go golfing. ion, Panic. your number. There were no area codes, I have come to the conclusion that cats Home recording, sound only, virtually but there were lots of party lines. are Republicans, considering their conserva- didn’t exist. There were a few disc and wire First class postage cost three cents. Post tive approach to life. On the other hand, recorders. When tape recording came in the cards were a penny. Before zip codes dogs seem to be the Democrats of the pet machines were huge, heavy reel-to-reel there were zones and before that nothing. world, more outgoing and adaptable to things. There were only forty-eight states. change. I’m not sure what birds are…proba- Radio featured dramas, comedy, situation Hats were a fashion must for both men bly independents and flighty, hopping from comedy, musical and quiz shows. I remem- and women. Men had to remove their hats one side to another as the weather changes. ber when Ricky and David Nelson were so when they came indoors. Women were All of which makes me wonder whether rab- young they couldn’t even play their own also expected to wear gloves. Hose had bits would vote for a “right to life” candi- parts. The aforementioned remark is for seams down the calves. Pompadours and date. those who still remember Ozzie and Harriet. big shoulder pads were high fashion for For those babies who don’t remember them, women during WWII. For a while I worked at the polls during look it up! Rock music of any kind didn’t exist but elections and it made me wonder about our In the kitchen there were no dishwashers, we did have Big Bands, Boogie-woogie, quality of voters. It’s sort of scary. I remem- microwaves, blenders or garbage disposals. and Conga lines. ber especially one woman who had to ask In fact, about the only appliance was the Music was played on record players us- how to scratch in order to vote for a candi- toaster, and they were not always automatic ing 78rpm discs (platters). Many of the date because “his twins were so cute.” Peo- and the toast had to be turned around by machines were of the hand crank type and ple complain about our government but hand. Gas stoves did not have automatic pi- had to be rewound after playing a couple what can you expect when choices are made lot lights and the burners and oven had to of records. The needles had to be changed on bases like that! • be lighted by a match. Many furnaces were frequently.

PIXEL NINE 8 JANUARY 2007 Whhiither FFaannddoomm? Ted White

“Geeze, Steve,” I said to . “I’m ex- v v v their respective comics fandoms. And comics hausted. Does it have to be right now?” fandom has always had “.” “No, of course not, Ted,” Steve said in his But knew nothing about Jerry Bails has died. soothing tone of voice. Very mellifluous, ac- fanzines or, indeed, any of the prior incarna- tually. “No, I was just curious.” Does that name mean anything to you? tions of comics fandom, when he reinvented Have you ever heard it? “Well, see, I’m going to write about it.” the wheel with Alter-Ego #1, March, 1961. Steve nodded, waiting expectantly. A whole lot of people know who Jerry Jerry had been a huge fan in his childhood Bails is – or was. They’re over there in “I’m going to call it – of All Star Comics – as indeed was I, actually comics fandom. Comics fandom has exist- “WHEN FANDOMS COLLIDE,” I said with – and its group of comic book characters ed in occasionally close parallel with SF a dramatic flourish. from other comics, the Justice Society of fandom for a long time – since the ‘30s. America. When DC Comics revived the Jus- “Was that with an exclamation point, Many early comics fans and apparently tice Society, this time around as the Justice Ted?” Steve inquired. He gave me an owlish the only ones who published comics League of America, in 1960, Jerry had an look. fanzines were also and maybe primarily epiphany and decided to publish a “newslet- “No, it was all-caps,” I said. SF fans. Dave Kyle and Malcolm Willits ter” for the comic’s new and old readers. Steve nodded. “I see,” he said. were two who published comics fanzines Thus was launched superhero comics fan- “It’s about a couple of things that have in the ‘30s and ‘40s respectively. Bhob dom, which took on a life of its own, dwarf- happened recently in two different corners Stewart created EC fandom, a very active ing all the comics fandoms which had pre- of fandom. Things that kinda point up how subset of comics fandom, in the early ‘50s. ceded it. different those corners are,” I said. Being SF fans and knowing all about Jerry was not some jerk kid. He had sever- “Tell me about it,” Steve said. His owlish fanzines, Kyle, Willits and Stewart import- al degrees and was teaching at Wayne State eyes had become hypnotic. ed that knowledge and terminology into University when he launched Alter-Ego. But

PIXEL NINE 9 JANUARY 2007 s ic Ego spin off its advertising section into a ing posted to the list, “Mormonism, the 19th m o separate, more frequent, ad-zine for buy- century's version of Scientology.”

C ers, sellers, and traders of comics, and Jerry said, “Only a sense of self-restraint D seeing a whole new fandom of other keeps me from so characterizing all religion. fanzines (most of them photo-offset, to I am a scientist by nature and training. I will present art well) springing up around agree that some religions are hokier and their feet. even more dangerous than others, but none Jerry also reinvented the idea of having of them makes any sense to me. a co-editor in another city. His was Roy “Obviously, my original issue (about the Thomas, a schoolteacher in St. Louis who changing nature of the media and their im- shared his interest in old All Star Comics. pact) seems beyond the pale of those on the In the mid-‘60s Roy moved to New York […] list. I won't pursue it. City, worked briefly at DC Comics, and “It is probably just as well that my death then settled in at Marvel Comics as Stan is near. I find the non-intellectual character Lee’s assistant. I met Roy soon after he ar- of the post-modern world depressing. Such rived in New York and we hung out to- fear of dealing with ideas, and getting be- gether regularly after that. We’ve stayed yond ‘I like this; I don't like that.’ Subjectivi- in touch over the years. ty is something I hadn't expected to find so I wrote a letter of comment to Jerry much of in the 21st century. I find it pretty Bails on his first issue, but I don’t recall boring, as well as depressing. much further correspondence between us. “As one of my earliest correspondents in When he turned Alter-Ego over to Roy and Fandom, I just wanted to say ‘so long,’ and I gafiated back into academia I lost track of enjoyed your ‘right-on’ critique of Alter-Ego him. #1. It was the first genuinely honest reply I got, and I always remembered it. Then, this year I joined a new comics “I hope your health is good.” list, formed from the apparent ashes of an I responded with concern about his older one I hadn’t been on, and a month he did project a somewhat gosh-wow enthu- health, and then apologized for what I sus- siasm into his fanzine, which undoubtedly or two later there was Jerry Bails, posting pected had been a rather snarky letter of connected with his younger readers. to the same list. I was impressed. He had comment. He replied, ignoring my query I no longer remember why, but Jerry sent dropped all the gosh-wow and was about his health, to say, “As you may recall, me the first issue of Alter-Ego, and, I think, thoughtful and insightful in his comments, I knew nothing of science fiction fandom all of those which followed in its original in- which tended to transcend comic books. when I started Alter-Ego, except a few ex- carnation. And I followed along, “lurking,” if In mid-November, I got an off-list email changes with Julie on one visit.” Julius you will, watching the early dittoed Alter- from Jerry, responding in part to my hav- Schwartz had shown him copies of the

PIXEL NINE 10 JANUARY 2007 Lupoffs’ Xero, which ran a series of articles “Well,” I said, cutting him off. “It’s too And something similar happened to the on comics under the heading, “All In Color late now. And anyway, that’s only one N3F. It became something parallel to fan- For A Dime.” “So, I was re-inventing the corner. Of fandom, I mean. There’s this dom. Rather than absorbing all other fan- wheel. I was glad to have your comments, other one…” clubs and organizations, it set itself up but the ‘gosh wow’ effect you noted at the alongside them, and created within itself time was what I was shooting for. I was also v v v endless “Bureau”s becoming fandom’s first trying to reach younger fans, most of which actual bureaucracy. knew nothing of science fiction.” For as long as I’ve been in fandom, the By 1948 or 1949 the N3F had become a That was my last note from Jerry. Two N3F has been a joke. And I mean that seri- laughingstock to the rest of fandom when days later he was dead. ously, folks. I’ve been a fan for 55 years Charles Burbee revealed that he’d received a There is talk in comics fandom of creating now, but the N3F – National Fantasy Fan letter from the N3F Welcome Bureau wel- an award in Jerry’s name. It will honor Federation – has been around for about coming him, a major BNF, into fandom. By comics fans. I think that’s an excellent idea. ten years longer. this early point the N3F had already become And it didn’t take ten years for another so insular and removed from the rest of fan- v v v one of those noble fannish ideas to prove dom that some of its members were igno- itself a mistake. The original idea had rant of who Burbee was. “Y’know, Ted,” Steve Stiles said to me. “I been ’s – in a piece he’d ti- Some of my contemporaries in early ‘50s should have gone to those comic art group tled “Unite or Fie” – to join all of fandom fandom joined the N3F with the vow of re- meetings you used to tell me about. Ever into one huge, all-embracing, umbrella or- since then, I’ve wished I had. I mean, I ganization. should have.” This urge was strong on fans in the just “You’ve been telling me that for years, prior to World War Two period. FAPA had now, Steve,” I said. “So I mentioned that to been formed in 1937 to give all fanzine John Benson recently. John went to all those editors a “clearing house” through which meetings, although he disagrees with me they’d send out their fanzines and receive about when and where they started. He ac- all the others. This idea was Don Woll- tually kept lists of who attended which meet- heim’s. Both Wollheim and Knight were ings. And guess whose name popped up on Futurians. several of those lists, Steve?” I pointed my Well, FAPA quickly evolved into some- finger in his direction, trying not to waggle thing parallel to genzines, rather than re- it admonishingly. placing them (and some, like Skyhook, “Yeah, well, once or twice. But not regu- were circulated both inside and outside larly. I never met Sid Check. I never smoked FAPA), denying fandom forever any single dope with Wally Wood – who is, as you central clearing house for all fanzines. know, one of my heroes.” (That is, until eFanzines.)

PIXEL NINE 11 JANUARY 2007 forming it. This included and in a bi-continental co-editorship of Steam matic approach when Neffers attend John Magnus, among others. Most of them Engine Time. cons and pass out club flyers, and that lasted no longer than two years in that orga- I applaud Jan for this, wholeheartedly the clubzine is trying to educate its mem- nization before dropping out in disgust, and without sarcasm or cynicism. The bership about well-known fen past and tired of butting heads against the en- urge to do fanzines, or participate in present. To certain people, nothing the trenched bureaucracy that controlled the them, is what binds us all, and she has N3F can do short of folding up and blow- N3F (usually in fact one or two obstinate been a positive inspiration. ing away will appease them. It is this fringe-fans who had dug into the N3F for That said, Jan is proving herself a true grudge-bearing, childish nonsense that the long haul). But then again, recall what I “Neffer,” as witness this letter which I exasperates me. I've had a run-in with said last issue about fan politics. gather she wrote to Chris Garcia, but was Andy Porter before re: the N3F (when he Over time the N3F became the bucolic posted, apparently with her permission, to was still running SF Chronicle, as it was backwater of fandom, most notable at differ- the Fmzfen list, by Jeff Redmond. then called), and I'm just damned sick of his attitude toward the club and anyone ent times for the, umm, “fannish characters” “Hi Chris, et al, who has an opinion different from his. who arose from it to general prominence – “I would like to offer a different per- people like Seth Johnson and Harriet spective to Chris' statement concerning “Because of the hostility visited on the Kolchak, each of whom inspired many sto- the N3F. N3F as a whole by the actions of some of ries to be told around the fannish campfires “The hostility between certain seg- its members decades ago, Neffers be- to wide-eyed new generations. ments of fandom at large and the N3F came defensive and, yes, in some cases But it’s still around, amazingly enough. I stems from the actions of several neo- hostile in return. was made aware of that some few years ago fen decades ago. These folks, new to “I find it exceptionally repugnant that by Janine Stinson, who, in addition to pub- the N3F and excited about passing on any fan would choose to be scornful and lishing her own Peregrine Nations, was word of a national club for SF readers, snobbish toward a neofan for doing putting out Tightbeam, the N3F “letterszine” approached all and sundry at cons something out of ignorance. Art Widner's of many generations duration. But the with urgings to join the N3F and get in attitude toward the N3F personifies this, copies I saw from Jan had few letters and on the fun. They were young, ignorant and he's still slagging the club (I've read consisted mostly of book reviews. Nor did of the ‘BNFs’ of fandom at the time, posts of his on newsgroups this year con- they have very many pages. and their ignorance pissed off a lot of cerning it). What is so damned hard Jan always struck me as a welcome oldtimers and snobs. Thus, the club about taking the neofan aside, calmly anachronism in modern-day fandom. A rela- has been the target of these and other and politely explaining that one has been tive late-comer to fandom, she picked up on fen who side with them for decades. in fandom for a long time, showing them the urge to do fanzines as entirely too many No matter that the people in N3F who the fanzine lounge at the con, and/or in- modern fans have not. She’s held onto that actually were the targets are either troducing the neofan to other longtime urge, too. Although she gave up Tightbeam, dead or no longer members. No matter fen and inviting him/her to some panels she kept PN going and joined Bruce Gillespie that the N3F now advocates the diplo- on fan history, or something similar?

PIXEL NINE 12 JANUARY 2007 There are people who've been in fandom Although he claims to be 42 years old, and by those who knew Frank and a long time who consider themselves and to be the member of a variety of writ- worked with him. BNFs (apart from those designated as ers’ organizations – among which the N3F “Copy and paste, hack and cut, snip BNFs by others, and who are humble stuck out like a sore thumb – and to be a and delete. Then rewrite, and rewrite about it) and expect (and sometimes de- published author (albeit via a vanity pub- again. The same quotes, facts, and infor- mand) obeisance from the rest of fan- lisher), he came on in Fmzfen like a clue- mation told (in the same ways) once dom for their self-described lofty posi- less adolescent. again. tion in that group. This is the kind of It didn’t help that Andy Porter almost “Sorry is it's amateurish by your high- snobbery I never expected to find in fan- immediately challenged his credentials, er standards, but I do not expect to win dom. wondering what the N3F was doing any Pulitzer prizes with anything about “There seems to be no motivation to among organizations like the SFWA and fanzines. Chris is the editor of his zine. educate among people like this, and the Romance Writers of America. Very If he likes it he uses it. It is, of course, that's really a shame, because they have quickly Redmond was reacting in kind – strictly voluntary for others to bother much to teach, if only they would con- as he perceived it – calling Robert Licht- read.” sider the giving aspect of it. They are hu- man “Herr Lichtmann” on the one hand, What Redmond is describing may not man, like the rest of us, not gods, and no while responding to a Swedish member of meet the legal definition of plagiarism, and more deserving of adoration in any form the list with a post written entirely in frac- may in fact be closer to how modern college than a tomato. tured Swedish and then debating the qual- students “write” their papers, but it’s a far “Regards, ity of that Swedish with Ulrika O’Brien cry from fanwriting. “Janine” and John-Henri Holmberg. While Andy Porter was stirring up the vil- Somehow it came up on the list that lagers and urging them to light their torches That’s the complete letter, as quoted by Redmond was the author of a piece on and storm Castle Redmond, I was trying to Redmond. It is what it is: both naïve and Frank Frazetta which had appeared in a be a voice of moderation on the list, not yet sensible, both paranoid and defensive. It is recent issue of Chris Garcia’s The Drink convinced that Redmond was more than an stereotypically “Neffer.” Tank. Virtually without prompting, Red- ignorant newby, or “neofan,” as we once Jan had herself been on the Fmzfen list mond offered this explanation of how he’d called them. Indeed, I was reminded of the until recently. What caused her to leave the “written” the piece: adolescent Andy Porter I’d once known. But list was apparently the reactions of several Redmond kept getting stranger and stranger people like Andy Porter and Robert Licht- “I downloaded most of it from the – the quote above may give a slight indica- man to the entrance of a new guy onto the Mars Dust webzine. Though the infor- tion – and then Jan Stinson delivered a list. That new guy was Jeff Redmond. (You mation is readily available from many round of stinging condemnation of Red- see how this all ties together? In this column other sites. I've never met Mr Frazetta mond’s critics and quit the list. there are no coincidences.) personally, and will not be able to do Not long after that list-master Bill Burns Redmond wandered into Fmzfen appar- so because of his death. The informa- was presented with evidence that Redmond ently courtesy of the N3F and Jan Stinson. tion on the sites is posted by his son, had “quoted” Lichtman from the list to Chris

PIXEL NINE 13 JANUARY 2007 Garcia, but had inserted an epithet into the spurious emails claiming to be forwarded “Okay,” Steve said. “That’s Janine Stinson. quote to make it appear Lichtman was in- by “Robert Lichtman” (with a quasi-forged What about this Redmond troll?” sulting Garcia. Burns tossed Redmond off yahoomail account in Lichtman’s name), “I gather he was her protégé of sorts. I the list. one of which was from a Nazi site. My think he maybe suckered her in with his gift This prompted Redmond to send me this spam is five times what it was previously. for gab, but I dunno. I mean, maybe she saw off-list email, responding to something I’d Good thing Jeff is not my enemy, eh? him as some kind of Pro or something. As said on the list: What he most certainly was is what for what he was, well, does anyone set out “I believe that, right or wrong, Ms they call on the Internet “a troll.” Some- to be a troll?” I was picking up steam. It was Stinson is seriously considering a legal one who joins a list to say provocative time for a new paragraph. action. I don't believe she can file any- things that stir people up, get them angry. “I mean,” I said to Steve Stiles, “you re- thing against the fmzfen in general, but It seems like he met a willing member the young Andy Porter – ‘Andy Sil- she may try to go after certain individu- accomplice/antagonist in Andy Porter, but verberg, Phonefan’?” als. She says her attorney is checking as time went on (and he remarked on Steve sighed. someone having a “Protestant nose”), he into harassment and stalking charges. I continued. “Andy had a difficult adoles- stirred more and more people up. The “Interesting that a short while ago she cence. He came through it. We took him into normally low-traffic Fmzfen was suddenly was very much against me. Though now the Fanoclasts and took him on our road burgeoning with posts. she apparently feels I am no longer any- trips, and he grew out of it. Well, most of it, one to feel threatened by. She has asked anyway.” It was time for another new para- v v v me to help her. I have replied that she graph. should wait and see what her lawyer “Who knows what Jeff Redmond was, and “I don’t get it, Ted,” Steve said, shaking comes up with first. what he became in response to the treat- his head. “What’s your point? Is it about “But I have been saving all the e-mail- ment he got? Did he join the list in order to the N3F, Jan Stinson, or this Jeff Red- ings I've been getting. Especially the ones disrupt it? Or was that just the way things mond guy?” the obscenities, threats, and defama- played out? If some people hadn’t chal- “All of the above, Steve,” I said, giving tions. The fmzfen group will continue, lenged him right off the bat, would he have Steve my Buddha look. “All of the above.” though there might be a few less partici- made all the same Wrong Moves?” I pointed I folded my hands across my lap and pants next year. at Steve. “Do you believe in predestination?” smiled. “It’s the N3F, you see. It sucks new “Just thought I'd let you know. I am fans in, promising them All Of Fandom, Steve shrank back. “Ted, you know I con- not your enemy, and I have no personal and giving them a fearful, paranoid back- verted to Judaism.” quarrel with you. Good luck.” water instead. To the extent that they “So, anyway,” I said. “That’s it. Does it In the days following his exit from ‘succeed’ in the N3F, they are bound to it. make sense now?” Fmzfen, Redmond has been subscribing vari- If or when they stick their heads out and “Well,” Steve said, shaking his head, “I ous of us (Porter, Lichtman, myself, others interact with other parts of fandom, dunno – it does when you tell it, but…” on Fmzfen) to spam lists, and sending us there’s some culture shock.” “That’s good enough for me,” I told him. •

PIXEL NINE 14 JANUARY 2007 Fouunndd IInn CCoolllleccttion Christopher Garcia

It’s never too surprising when I find a and led to Apple becoming the most domi- fanzine in the collection. It’s even less sur- nant force in the early days of personal prising when I find a filk tape lying around. home computing, but before Apple there I barely bat an eye at fannish buttons any- were the CP/M machines. Beasts like the more. It’s even easy to believe that I’ll find IMSAI and the Northstar Horizon all made fen in the volunteer pool of the Computer hobbyists drool and fork out thousands of History Museum. There’s only been one dollars to bring the CPU home without thing that’s really hit me lately as strange: a any software. The King of that first gener- programme book. ation was the Altair 8800. Now, I’ve never actually found a pro- The Altair was built in Albuquerque by gramme book from any convention in the Micro Instrumentation & Telemetry Sys- collection that wasn’t put there by me. I’ve tems, or MITS. They were a small compa- found several that I’ve picked up while look- ny that got the cover of Popular Electron- ing for work things, but this was a copy of ics and were inundated with requests to the 2002 Con Jose Programme Book mixed buy the system. A couple of kids, Bill in with an even stranger lot of stuff. Gates and Paul Allen, started a company About thirty years ago, everyone was to provide software, starting with BASIC, putting out home computers. In early 1977, that they could sell to MITS’ customer Apple, Commodore and Tandy all released base. This was a great idea, but as has al- small computers for the home that really ways been the case, it was easy to make a took off and sold millions of units around copy of and therefore easy to buy once the world. The Apple ][ was a huge success, and spread among all your friends. This

PIXEL NINE 15 JANUARY 2007 led to the company Micro-Soft, to earn and so many other things that I had a anyways. I took the programme book home about two bucks an hour for the work they hard time figuring out why anyone would with me and went over it a few days later. put into the programming of the BASIC lan- be against Bill Gates so badly. Yeah, he’s Inside, there were a bunch of notes about guage system for the Altair (and I think it richer than a foie gras milkshake, but he’s various panels. One of those panels was the explains why Microsoft is so radically out of a smart guy and a decent programmer. History of Computing panel that I was the step with Free Software). Yeah, he’s anti-competition, but his com- moderator for. My name was circled, as was Bill Gates, the guy who actually pro- pany has put out some good stuff in with that of Eric Raymond. Next to my name he grammed the tape (and did a damn fine job the crap they turn out more often. This wrote ‘give papers to museum?’ and next to of it), wrote an open letter to just about ev- was a collection of things I’d expect to Raymond’s he had written ‘ask about Gates’ erywhere that would print it. He sent it to find coming from a guy who had spent book.’ the hobbyist mags, the individual clubs like years researching the evils of a single I thought for a minute about it and I re- The Homebrew Computer Club and the man. alised who had donated it, and when even. Boston Computer Society, and to the few I looked all over the box and couldn’t At that panel, there was a guy who kept dealers who had started popping up, like find the address or the name. I figured it’d bringing up Pro-Linux and Anti-Microsoft The Byte Shoppe, the Computer Store and just be some guy who I’d never heard of stuff. He was so disruptive that I had to let Computerland. The letter, which basically Cliff Stoll run on for a while about calcula- said knock it off, became the first well- tors so that he wouldn’t interrupt (and if known letter in the personal computing you’ve ever heard Cliff speak, you’ll know world and also signaled the beginning of the that it’s impossible to interrupt him Personal Computer Business era. That letter anyhow). The interrupter, as I remember it, killed the Hobbyist era and made Bill Gates stopped me the next day and asked if I some life-long enemies. would accept some of his early stuff from One of whom must have donated this box the Homebrew Club. I said yes and he had that had the WorldCon programme in it. me follow him to the car and take them. There was the Open Letter, as printed in There was no box, so I went to my car and the Homebrew Computer Club newsletter, put them in the box that I rediscovered sitting right below the Con Jose book, fol- when looking for other materials. He must lowed by several rebuttal pieces that ap- have put the programme book in with the peared in that newsletter, as well as in those papers and I put it on top at some point. I of several other clubs. There was a long post put a bunch of boxes in the museum after I printed from the Berkley Community Memo- got back and I never thought to look at them ry Project that argued with the article (and again…at least not until I started doing this this was a couple of years after it had been column. published). There were anti-Gates articles, For once, fandom has given me an excuse notes on Microsoft’s late 1990s problems Paul Allen and Bill Gates ca. 1976 to do my job a little better! •

PIXEL NINE 16 JANUARY 2007 I Feel A Draft Dave Locke

I thought I’d try for a change-of-pace this bended together in my memory. But the like the episode in Alice’s Restaurant. I heard time. Often I sit at the typewriter and bring first one I went to, at the age of 18 when that one fellow became excited and got it to life some ugly item out of my medical his- Board #40 initially took an interest in me, stuck in the bottle, but I dismissed this as tory for the purpose of amusing you. I do is a definite standout in the memories of locker-room humor. this, however, in the pink of health, because my mind (set that to music, someone). The blood test was one of the more inter- these stories are easier to look back on that Sort of like gluing an 8 x 10 glossy photo esting examinations, The fellow with the way. Also, they don’t have typewriters in op- inside an Instamatic photo-album. needle had very little feel for that sort of erating rooms. This time, however, I’m not I guess that when I turned 18, a lot of thing, and would in the pink of health, so I will write this col- other guys did, too, So many, in fact, that come up dry on umn with a Bromo-Seltzer at hand, and I there was barely standing-room at the ex- two or three jabs will tell you about a time that I was healthy. amination building and it took them all before he con- This is, however, a medical story. day to process us through. I guess some- firmed that his vic- Back in the dim, dark days of the early body in their traffic department fell down tim did indeed have ’60s, when I was classified 1-A by my Local on the job. They were also too under- blood. I have al- Draft Board #40, they would occasionally staffed to handle us all. ways felt that the worry about my health and cheerfully re- We stripped down to our shoes and medical profession quest that I get a physical examination. Of shorts, and trotted around gripping a is a poor place in course, I say “cheerfully” in a facetiousness, medical form upon which entries were which to encounter n lei K as I recall from the tone of their letters that placed as we went from examination to sadists.

my health would be in grave danger if I examination. After you had red were to disregard their requests. So I always As far as I know, everybody got through given your quart of nf went. After awhile, these examinations all the piss-in-a-bottle test in fine shape, un- blood, you were di- Ma

PIXEL NINE 17 JANUARY 2007 rected to sit down somewhere along a row when the examiner placed his fist in the I had filled in, with his files. “The addresses of benches. Unfortunately, after awhile the examinee’s back and shoved him against don’t match here; what the hell’s going on?’ benches filled up. One fellow stood there for the X-ray plate. Everyone recognizes the he snapped. “Don’t you believe in sending in awhile, feverishly looking for an empty spot fact that your chest has to be against the a change-of-address to your board, punk?” so that he could sit down. He didn’t fine plate if you are going to get a good X-ray, “I sent in a change-of-address,” I replied, one, and he much too polite to ask someone but the odd part was that each examinee chest up tight against the plate. I might else to give up their seat, So he fainted. I already had his chest against the plate. mention that you would spend this entire watched five guys five up their seats, so that The fist-in-the-back was for the purpose of session with your chest against the plate, three of them could lay him face-down on trying to push your chest through the met- waiting for three things: 1) the fist in your the bench. al plate, and it also served to get you a back, 2) for him to take the X-ray at his con- When it became my turn under the nee- good crack in the jaw or the nose when venience, 3) to get out of there. dle, the black fellow who was wielding it be- your face rebounded against the plate. De- “I haven’t got it here,” he growled. What came rather upset over the fact that after re- spite the fact that everyone saw this, the did you do, send it on a postcard?” peated efforts he was unable to locate any examiner was clever enough to vary his “No, I sent a letter.” blood in my left arm. I ventured the com- timing so that when he caught you he “You’re a goddam liar, kid. When do you ment that had he used colored dyes in his would get the maximum effect. The con- claim you sent it in?” needle I would now possess the world’s versation, or at least mine, is well remem- “Two weeks ago. Probably hasn’t gotten to largest tattoo, and it was at this point in bered and it went like this: you yet.” time that I was first introduced to the word The examiner took the sheet that I was That was a choice piece of wording, and “honkey.” The wielder of this Tom-Thumb carrying and compared my address, which he probably chuckled to himself as he javelin later discovered blood in my right promptly ‘got me’ with a fist in the back. arm, after finally giving up on the left. A few Sure enough, I banged my jaw. more holes in my left arm and it would have “Stand up against that plate, creep!” he fallen off at the elbow. hollered. “How the hell as I gonna get an X- A later examination was to have an X-ray. ray.” I didn’t say anything, I just stood I discovered further along in life that there is against the plate. an agitator of the first-water at every such “You getter send in your goddam change- military establishment, and at this place it of-address next time, boy, or we’re gonna was the fellow who gave you the X-ray. Only be down on you with meat hooks.” I heard n

one person was allowed in the room at a him take the X-ray. When it stopped lei K time with this gentleman, so you couldn’t whirring I stayed there, as I had a premoni- hear what was being said, but you could tion of what would happen if I stepped red nf

look through the window and see that each back without his express authorization. Ma fellow in there was getting a rough time. A “You know it’s over, punk,” he sneered. particularly odd recurring phenomenon was “Get your ass out of here.” He slapped my

PIXEL NINE 18 JANUARY 2007 paper into my shoulder and it fell away onto struction to turn around, bend over, and “Teeth – OK.” I stepped out of line (in more the floor. I squatted to the floor and glanced spread our cheeks with our hands. We ways than one) and hailed down an official- at his face before coming up. He had a ma- were to remain in that position until the looking person. He stepped over to me and I lignant smile as he watched me pick up the doctor patted our ass. So, hunched over, pointed out this notation to him. paper, and was joyfully waiting for some the doctor shuffled from body to body, “What’s the matter, son, don’t you think sort of retort on my part. I smiled broadly at eyeballing each asshole as he went up and your teeth are all right?” him, and watched the smile disappear from down the lines, patting a cheek as he fin- I took them out and held them in the his face. I left. When I exited, the smile dis- ished with each examinee. Now I know palm of my hand. appeared from mine. why his back was permanently bent. And I “What do you think?” I said. The asshole test came next, I believe. All pity the poor guy who was at the end of I damn near got drafted right on the spot. you guys will remember that one. You gals the last line and had to remain in that It was at this point I discovered that the may or may not have heard of it, but you ridiculous position for an ungodly amount services have no sense of humor. may have caught a passing reference to it of time. So there’s another medical story for you, now and again. For your benefit, I will detail At this point, they began to realize that far enough in the past that I can look back just exactly what it consists of. Hundreds there were too many of us and too few of on most of it in a humorous key. Even if I do upon hundreds of guys will retain their them, and that they couldn’t possibly ad- have an upset stomach and a mild headache. shoes but will discard their shorts and their minister all the tests to all of us and get us papers, and will stand in rows, each row fac- out of there in that same day. So they ing another, for a period of maybe ten min- started skipping tests on some of us. utes before the people in charge get around I was wearing glasses, so they skipped to starting the examination. You could see me and a few dozen other eyeglass-wear- everyone’s eyes roving around, looking for ers on the eye test. They got us together in the biggest hammers. This was in the ab- a group and made notations opposite sence of anything better to do with your “Eyes” on each of our papers, and then di- time. This is also a unique experience, and rected us to some other examination. I perhaps your only opportunity to discover guess there wasn’t much need for them to some correlation between hammer-size and be very clever about these short-cuts they a physical feature which would be apparent were taking, as which of us teenagers when a person is clothed. I discovered one dared to say anything about it? correlation which appeared to be about 90% Well, unfortunately I did. correct, but I don’t want to give away any After being passed on two or three ex- trade secrets or digress too far from my sto- aminations, I took a look at the medical ry. At any rate, we stood there until this old, paper that I was carrying to see just what has-been doctor came shuffling along with was being put down there. One of the his bent-back. Then we were issued the in- more interesting items was the notation

PIXEL NINE 19 JANUARY 2007 Being Frank Peter Sullivan

Banana Wings 28 ommended by the yoof of today. There’s really tells you all you need to know, assum- (Claire Briarley and Mark Plummer) also an article by Max giving some more ing you have all the necessary context. But, One of the joys of fan- of the background to the YAFA (Young for those of us who came in late... nish writing is that it is Adult Fan Activities) stream at the British Who Killed Science Fiction? was Earl’s 1960 possible to fall off the Worldcon, but which is also an excuse for anthology, including contributions on that precipice of over-extend- some more James Bacon stories. theme from just about all the big name sci- ed metaphor into the The lettercolumn is as usual excellent, ence fiction authors of the time. “Science valley of the frankly with a good trans-atlantic flavo(u)r, and Fiction” in this context means magazine sci- bizarre, and as long as there’s a closing article by Claire, talking ence fiction – ironically, it’s still interesting, it about reading old fanzines (with a nod to media science fiction doesn’t really matter. both the Checkpoint and Skyrack archive (films and telly) has So, in the editorial this projects, which – together with Ansible, of prospered as never be- time, an extended re- course – means that the whole of British fore since 1960. Earl view of Steam Engine Time turns into a con- fandom’s newszine history since 1959 is had plans for a second voluted discussion around Bruce Gillespie’s now available on-line). edition in 1980, but this metaphorical underpants. fell by the wayside. Meanwhile, BW’s own sercon underpants eI 29 However, with the help are showing with a round table discussion (Earl Kemp) of his son, Terry Kemp, piece on “New SF for Older People,” based This issue is sub-titled “The Compleat Earl has now pulled to- on the premise that the old wrinklies in fan- and Unexpurgated Who Killed Science Fic- gether both the original edition, and the un- dom really ought to start reading some of tion?” Much like the title of the film Alvin published material from 1980, in one mam- the newer science fiction out there, as rec- and the Chipmunks meet Frankenstein, this moth (189 page) e-book.

PIXEL NINE 20 JANUARY 2007 If you were going to compile a list of the Science Fiction Five Yearly 12 pects of writing something like this in a greatest half-dozen fannish publications, I (Lee Hoffman, Geri Sullivan, Randy Byers) fanzine like SFFY is that there will be a natu- suspect that Who Killed Science Fiction? Cultures, including sub-cultures such as ral tendency to revisit all of this five years would be on the list. Given the rarity value our own of science fiction fandom, have a on and see how accurate the predictions of the original paper edition (something that tendency to build up traditions. Indeed, if turned out to be. Earl deliberately engineered at the time), it’s I was feeling all sociological, I might go so If you can get hold of the paper version of good to have it available in electronic for- far as to say that a culture or sub-culture this fanzine, rather than relying on the mat. What next – an e-book version of Fran- is, at least in part, defined by its tradi- download edition, it’s well worth doing so - cis Towner Laney’s Ah! Sweet Idiocy!? tions. Fanzine fan- the white fibertone paper makes it feel like a dom’s traditions are, fannish artifact from times past. • Peregrine Nations 6.3 ironically, often non- (Jan Stinson) fanzine based (e.g. Banana Wings 28 (Claire Briarley & Mark Plummer) This fanzine has always had an exception- TAFF). But this quarterly, paper, A4, 32 pages. al lettercol, and this issue’s 12-pager is well fanzine, appearing ev- e-mail: [email protected] up to standard. A lot of fanzine lettercols ery lustrum since come across as a series of conversations be- 1951, is very much a eI 29 (Earl Kemp) tween the editor and the letter writer. But tradition of fanzine quarterly, PDF or HTML, 11 x 8½", 189 pages Jan’s lettercol has a more ‘multi-lateral’ fandom – and, as a http://www.efanzines.com/EK/ flavour, with writers responding to each oth- bonus, does actually Peregrine Nations 6.3 (Jan Stinson) er’s points in previous letters at least as happen to be a fanzine. It’s also the quarterly, PDF, 8½ x 11", 20 pages. much as responding to articles. The whole fanzine that keeps the word ‘lustrum’ http://www.efanzines.com/PN/ feel is more like a large, informal APA rather alive, notwithstanding Wikipedia’s claim than a conventional letter column. Of that the word is now obsolete. Science Fiction Five Yearly 12 (Lee Hoff- course, as a minor APA-hack myself, this is The stand-out article for me was Claire man, Geri Sullivan, Randy Byers) absolutely fine by me. Brialey’s piece, ostensibly comparing her five yearly (of course), paper or PDF, 11 x 8½", As well as the experience at a ZZ9 (Hitch-hikers’ Guide to 58 pages. http://www.efanzines.com/SFFY/ stand-out lettercol, the Galaxy Fanclub) pub meet twenty there are also a years ago to the one-day convention earli- Oh, and there has been the usual slew of few general arti- er this year to announce the TAFF results, fine issues of The Drink Tank from Chris cles and book re- coincidentally held in the same pub. In Garcia this month (http://www.efanzines.- views, plus Jan re- practice, it’s also at least in part another com/DrinkTank). Plus the Plokta web site vives her own series of James Bacon stories. And with an has been updated with some more recent is- fanzine review col- undercurrent of hope and expectation of sues of this Hugo Award-winning fanzine, umn. the emergence of a new generation of now available up to April 2005’s issue 34 British fans. One of the time-binding as- (http://www.plokta.com/plokta).

PIXEL NINE 21 JANUARY 2007 Pixelated

Notes From Byzantium Never did much digging, except for the Lee Lavell time we buried a cigar box (remember leelavell at comcast dot net Lee Lavell cigar boxes?) of bottle caps (remember From what I read I suspect that Eric may metal bottle caps?) in the back yard. I re- Eric Mayer have some Hobbit blood in him and that his call the hole being as tall as I am but then emayer00 at epix dot net natural home, in which he would feel most I was smaller then. comfortable, would be in a hole. I know I’m Joseph T. Major that way. I like basements and enclosed Lloyd Penney jtmajor at iglou dot com places. I love where I live but I keep most of I remember wanting to have my own little my blinds shut so I feel enclosed. place when I was a kid, and my bedroom Lloyd Penney just wasn’t it. I remember getting a large penneys at allstream dot net Joseph Major wood and wire crate, and converting it I used to spread sheets over the chairs in the into a little sanctum sanctorum all my John Purcell living room and pretend I was living in a own. A sheet over top to light the inside j_purcell54 at yahoo dot com tent. That and propping up the mattress so I yet keep the sun out, a blanket and pillow could lie down on the box spring. and cold drinks and goodies inside, plus a We never did have a cornstalk sukkah, radio for some good tunes. That little ar- back when we lived on a lot cut out of my rangement lasted all of one week, for my grandfather's farm. Did do a lot with tobac- brothers couldn’t stand to see me having co sticks, but that's another story. such a good time, and they wrecked the When we moved in closer to town my fa- whole thing as soon as I went inside the ther built, or had built, a little hut under a house. They also wrecked my radio, and it tree in the back yard. I should take a look took me a long time to forgive them for and see if the place is still there. that. Illustrations by Manfred Klein

PIXEL NINE 22 JANUARY 2007 Lee Lavell has a point ences in fandom. By the time I came onto monster heaven we saw his foot sitting on about all the branches the fannish scene (1973), fandom had sig- the sea bed. Which was good news because which have sprung nificantly grown in size and begun its he was capable of regeneration. Sadly it m out from fandom. It's balkanization with Comics, ERB-dom, must take a long time because I've been amazing when you SCA, and Star Trek subgroups. The explo- awaiting his return for over forty years now. stop to think about it sion of media sf thanks to Star Wars in the how many interest mid-70s resulted in more subgroups, thus Joseph Major groups can trace their I have to agree with Lee's concluding anal- I figure the monsters are getting directions. lineage back to sf fandom, many of them ogy that Science Fiction is a tree, and all There's some sort of undersea Travellers' much larger than sf fandom. I'm not so sure of these branches grow naturally out of Aid: “Yes, you want to take that whether that makes them part of SF fan- the main trunk. The fertilizers - computer, course. Climb ashore and stomp away!” It's dom. Some of those branches seem to have entertainment, gaming - make sense, too. like the space station run by the Romulans broken off, fallen in the river and floated out At least I have the choice of which branch that directs Unstoppable Alien Probes to to sea. of this stfnal tree to climb out onto. (By Earth, or occasionally to the Klingon Empire. the way, great idea to use Lee's old World- (It has to be the Romulans; they never get Lloyd Penney con registration cards as illoes.) hit. There's no money in it so the Ferengi I never thought of fandom as fractured, but are out, and the Borg are an Unstoppable as a smorgasbord of interests. You could Alien Probe.) sample a little from each bowl, or chow Tokyo Rose down on one particular dish, whatever you Lee Lavell John Purcell pleased. I’ve done my sampling and chowing Monsters always attack the country/city I simply adore Godzilla movies, and have a down, and as a result, I like to think I know that has produced the film, which begs small collection of them here. They are so a little something about a lot of various fan- the question of the chicken or the egg. much fun to heckle. For that matter, any- doms, and have found the interests I prefer Perhaps the monsters are attacking that thing that's labeled a "Sci Fi Original Movie" to settle with. I just wish that others had location in revenge for the terrible films is a lot of fun to heckle, if you can stifle your been as curious as I was so that they could being made about them. gagging reflex long enough. Given a choice understand what interests me. of War of the Gargantuas over The Flint- Eric Mayer stones is tough. I think that I'd opt for the John Purcell I am pretty certain Godzilla isn't out in the monsters. Well. I never thought of fandom being frac- woods. You'd see his head sticking up out tured; mostly, I have thought of fans as be- of the pines from miles away. Dave Lock- ing fractured. Lee has a longer experience e's article was hilarious. How much great Whither Fandom? with fans than I have, and she went through stuff did he write during the 70s alone? Lee Lavell the nuttiness of Seventh Fandom and wit- My favorite monster was Reptilicus. At the The local ISFA clubs in the 50s, 60s and 70s nessed firsthand the growth of media influ- end of the movie, after he was blown to solved the political problem by not allowing

PIXEL NINE 23 JANUARY 2007 any politics. These ISFAs split off from the tive in another group, because we tend to And even actual fan histories are not sub- first ISFA because Ray Beam, who organized only get one side of the story. jected to the sort of scrutiny real histories it, wanted the club to do things so a bunch I ran across an example of the sort of have to survive. In the larger world falsifica- of the members quit the club. Ray changed thing that happens last year. I was poking tions and careless mistakes are far less likely the name of the club so we reorganized, tak- around the Internet to get an idea of what to go unchallenged and opposing viewpoints ing the name back. Our club, throughout its had been going on in Fandom during the and interpretations are more likely to be several existences, had but one philosophy: past twenty years. I googled the esteemed available to anyone who is interested in do nothing as a whole. This was not written editor of Warhoon 28. Naturally I found judging what actually happened. Fandom is into by-laws. We had no by-laws. It was just mostly references to the great TAFF ker- too small for that. There aren't enough fan understood. About the only thing the club fuffle. I was startled, though not particu- historians to ride herd on each other. Worst did as a whole was to try to get people to larly surprised, to come upon a mention of of all, when it comes to controversies, fans contribute toward paying for refreshments myself in Rob Hansen's “Then” which have often gafiated and taken their sides of at meetings (this was the “treasurer’s” job) was…how can I put politely? A fabrica- the story with them. and sending out meeting notices (the “secre- tion? Having said that, I will admit I am in- tary’s” job). Oh, we occasionally had a picnic Well, let's be kind. Rob had apparently clined to believe Ted's side of the Gilliland to which members contributed to the pitch- taken it upon himself to read my mind but affair simply because it sounds so typical of in. At one time the president was a dog. Lat- his telepathic powers were not all he fan- what happens when a new wife decides to er on even that office was dispensed with cied them to be. Or maybe he had found mark out her territory. And that, I would and the top officer was my cat, Gummitch, his psychic abilities trustworthy in the guess, probably had more to do with the un- who was High Priest of Mrs. Pboth, the club past for pleasantness than fan politics. goddess. (We eschewed Ghu.) If someone writing fan history but there were distur- Fan politics are often not so much local as entered the club who wanted it to do some- bances in the aether that day. I suppose they are personal. It is a bad idea to get in- thing, like the Three Davids, they were im- he just didn't want to be a pest by query- volved, or even form opinions on, fan dis- mediately encouraged and helped to do ing me directly on the matter so I proba- putes which purport to be about fan politics things on their own. bly shouldn't be too harsh. if you know nothing about the interpersonal I didn't see any reason to get up in arms relationships which are what the disputes re- Eric Mayer over an off-hand remark so I let it pass, ally arise from, as I know only too well. I hate to admit it, but controversial stuff is however if it had been a whole article bound to generate the most response, as I'm then it might be a different story and – the Lloyd Penney about to prove. Ted's account of the point is – there is a lot of such faux fan I remember Dolly Gilliland contretemps was fascinating, history floating around. Gilliland quite well, al- though in all fairness I must reserve judg- Fans will insist on presenting unsub- ways easy to talk to, k ment. Current fans, or fans in the group we stantiated opinions as fact. They will also and Alexis kind of held associate with, tend to be in the right, as op- characterize autobiographies and personal to the shadows. It is posed to fans who have gafiated or are ac- memoirs as histories, which they are not. strange that we got to

PIXEL NINE 24 JANUARY 2007 know Dolly and Lee that in lettercolumns. However, I do thank Eric Mayer better than we knew Ted for this cautionary tale. Where is the Interesting piece by Tim Cassidy on crea- Alexis. When it came fun in causing such a ruckus, and losing a tures out of folklore. So we might have l to Lee, we knew her good friend in the process? This simply lurking around us here in Pennsylva- from living in the Buf- makes no sense to me. nia?!! The idea that there might be strange falo/Niagara Falls creatures out in the woods in our civilized, area. We met Lee and built-up part of the world sounds preposter- Gerry Uba when we Fearsome Creatures ous at first, but from where we are you can first started going to the Contradiction series Lee Lavell look out over a seemingly endless succession of conventions in NFNY. Gerry was confined Marcus Loidolt, an Outdoor Education of mountains, mostly forested, mostly undis- to a wheelchair, and I could tell that Lee teacher, told me of a “mythical” creature turbed except for an occasional overgrown was getting a little tired of the whole thing. I in Indiana which turned out not to be logging trail or a hunting cabin. It's undis- do not even know if Gerry is still alive. Both mythical after all. This animal, the Swamp puted there are coyotes out there and wild the Ubas disappeared for the longest time, Rabbit, was reputed to be at least twice boar, neither of which I've seen. I did see a and I didn’t see Lee again until a Worldcon the size of a normal cottontail, was aquat- 400 pound bear in our backyard one after- sometime in the early 90s when she ap- ic, had webbed feet and climbed trees. It noon. They live out there too, although you peared on Alexis’ arm. Lee donated lots of turns out that the swamp rabbit is an ac- wouldn't normally see any evidence of them homemade jewelery to sell, with the pro- tual rabbit, more common in such states very far from the woods. I suppose if there ceeds to go to funding the Toronto in 2003 as Texas and Arkansas. It is larger than were Squonk someone would've spotted one bid. the usual cottontail, being around 6 to 8 but maybe Squonk are smart enough to stay pounds, is aquatic in nature and will often out of sight. John Purcell “snorkel” underwater. I found no mention Ted White's “Whither Fandom?” column this of webbed feet but there were references time is most intriguing, and one that had me to splayed feet. I also could not find any- Joseph Major shaking my head. How people can take this thing about it climbing trees, but it does From this one goes to . I once hobby interest so seriously is beyond me. I not burrow, but instead builds nests out of read an article on folk tales where the au- freely admit that I've done it, notably over twigs, sticks and such on the ground. Its thor pointedly disdained the Paul Bunyan campaigning for the editorship of Rune back habitat in Indiana is in a very small part of stories, because, you see, they weren't real in 1980, but realized shortly after that southern Indiana and it is on Indiana’s folklore; some individual had actually writ- teapot of a tempest that such behavior takes protected list. It occurs to me that this ten them. all the fun out of being a fan. Yuck! Fan pol- may explain some of Tim’s “fearsome The fame of legendary creatures increases itics is not for me. I remember reading these creatures”…perhaps they are actual ani- as one goes west. For example, the eruption letters Ted refers to in File:770 last year, mals that are so rare for that area that of Mount Saint Helens destroyed the habitat again not understanding what in the heck they have become exaggerated to the of a protected species: Bigfoot. Yes, Bigfoot was going on. I tend to gloss over things like point of becoming mythical. is a protected species, and the area around

PIXEL NINE 25 JANUARY 2007 Mount Saint Helens had a large number of English Lit was useless. (No, I stand cor- ders. It's a pity; I was waiting to see Do- Bigfoot sightings. rected...I know a degree in English Lit is minick Dunne's review. (Dunne's book Jus- useless) tice contains several virulent essays on John Purcell Andy Porter's LoCs about duplicating the trial, and decrying Simpson's acquittal; I really enjoyed Tim Cassidy's piece. There are regular mini-articles. I found a place as you know, Dunne's daughter Dominique are a lot of “fearsome creature” myths in the in Manhattan which did color xerox for 50 was murdered by a guy who got off easy.) stories of native Americans, and it would be cents a sheet. In the late seventies color Lee Lavell shouldn't complain. I remem- so cool to revive them again. Fun, fun, fun xerox was unusual, to me at least. I ber the issue of Astromancer Quarterly that stuff. scraped up enough money to do a cover. had most of a picture of an elephant with Must've been at the shop for three hours. the note, "Continued on Page 78". This was, Being Frank The machine kept breaking down. They by the way, a 32-page zine. (The bidzine for gave the impression people didn't usually the abortive Buffalo Worldcon bid. One re- Lee Lavell try to make 60 copies. grets that the zine did not continue after the While I like Peter Sullivan’s reviews of the Amusing observations on Gaiman and bid folded.) contents (although they are a bit Tucker in Joseph Major's letter. superficial), I wish he would say something John Purcell about the layout and presentation of each Joseph Major As for your loccol, your editing this time fanzine. Conspiracy theories are what silly people around was a good idea, grouping com- ments about a particular topic together. Lots Eric Mayer do in order to have the world make sense. Wiser folk realize that the world never of faneds have tried this format before, and Peter Sullivan does a nice job with his cap- made sense to begin with. it takes a deft hand to pull it off. Including sule reviews. The fact he has so many zines As of this writing the furor has just died subheadings helps to move from topic to to review every month is remarkable. down over the brief career of O. J. Simp- topic. Good job. • son's attempt to make a little money by Pixelated arguing how he would have committed Lee Lavell the murders if he had committed the mur- Interesting way of doing the LoCs this time. Keeps most of the topics all together instead of scattered all over the place.

Eric Mayer You majored in Medieval History. Eeeek! v You probably know more about Byzantine times than I do. And I thought a degree in

PIXEL NINE 26 JANUARY 2007