L VOLUME CVII, NUMBER 22 PASADENA, CALIFORNIA ApRIL 10, 2006 sh BY: MCNAMARA and launched their own website, http://www.mitcannon.com/. The score was 6 to 1 as of According to Caltech Media March. But as of April 6, MIT Relations, "the Caltech campus struck back "That's gotta be is taking the prank with much worth at least 10 points - not good humor." But why not? really for originality, but more The cannon does not, accord- for execution," according to some, belong to Caltech. an the plan~ they must have done, they made one flaw," remarked Flem- o ing frosh Deepak ~ Mishra, "that they ~ took the Flem­ ",. ~ mg cannon, not a § Caltech cannon." ~ The cannon sits 13 now by the Green S building which was pranked last year by a laser show displaying the letters "c" "A" "I....." "T" "E" "C" "H." MIT added MIT students enjoy Fleming's fine cannon. The cannon is now located at East Campns, an MIT dorm. This plaque explains the cannon's trip "a large Brass Rat made of gold-plat­ being put to use. Photographs with the cannon. In fact, forget Caltech's policy, is selling T­ http://www.caltechvsmit.com/ ed aluminum" to the barrel ofthe are being posted on MIT's web­ the cannon," remarked senior shirts to commemorate the a site keeping track on the on­ cannon, according to a plaque site of bikini-clad coeds posing Jeff Phillips. Those who have event. Expect this prank war to going prank war. MIT made it commemorating the transport of with the cannon. They can be been here for a shorter period of escalate. known to the world that they the cannon. found at http://web.mit.edu/ec/ time reacted differently. Those were responsible for the March Despite being away from www/cannoncoeds/. Reactions quotes are not printable. Note: Caltech's Prefrosh Week­ 28 disappearance last Thursday Fleming house, the cannon is are mixed. "I say take 'em back MIT, taking a cue from end starts the 20th. Partying Italian Style at Lloyd Hawking Brings the rowds BY: ZEB ROCKLIN members of the team seniors, this would be their last chance. Last the first of the Patrick President of the Caltech Chess Club and mas­ a humorous slideshow that was '--''''''"''.11 almost won the BY: MARISSA CEVALLOS US Amateur Team National ter Caltech on how Malruey, a frosh fellow master, Eu- to under­ the third time As Caltech qualifil~d was on board two. stand so much the Liu of the universe. adcl1tlCH1 to Away 2 War on the on Drugs 4 Page 3 Gay Scientists! Page 5 3 Fencers Compete Regionals Page 7 2 THE CALIFORNIA TECH NEWS APRIL 10, 2006 of time, chess players typically Continued from page 1 enjoy as much as three hours in BY: MARENA LIN staircase. This left nearly 70 in­ tropical regions. with an additional 5 seconds per tournaments, and often use every jured and 29 dead. move. Unlike the regional cham­ minute. Pressured by the clock, Brazil's First Astronaut Disaster After Tornadoes pionships, the National Cham­ Liu had lost a piece, and narrow­ pionship is played by computer, ly missed a win. He was finally Brazilian Marcos Ponte be­ More Photos from Mars Residents of Gallatin, Tennes­ with only electronic communica­ checkmated with only six seconds came the first astronaut in space see sort through the wreckage left Processed tion connecting each competitor on his clock. when he made the 250 mile trip in the wake of fierce storms for Scientists at NASA's JPL have to his opponent. Caltech's first It was almost unbelievable. to the international space station, the second time in the last week. processed photographs from opponents were the winners of After three hours-no, after four arriving on April 1st. Ponte had Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter, the Midwest's regional champi­ years-the championship would made the weeklong journey with revealing more information about Bush's Credibility Taking onship. As play was scheduled to be decided in seconds. The tour­ an American and a Russian, both the influence of meteor impacts, Dive begin at lOAM, a serious problem nament director was hovering ofwhom were embarking on a six water, and wind in shaping the Back in 2003, former Vice became evident. Play on boards overGutman's shoulder, as caught month mission orbiting the Earth. landscape. President's chief of staff Libby three and four proceeded normal­ up in the game as everyone else, He landed in safely Kazakhstan leaked classified information to a ly, but neither of the Midwest's and each member of the Caltech on April 8th. Early Christian Manuscript New York Times reporter hoping top two boards was present. Was team was evaluating Gutman's Found to encourage an article that U.S. it possible that they had forgotten position, trying to determine what Iraqis Angered by Egypt's After 1,700 years, this manu~ intelligence firmly believed that about daylight savings time? hope they had. President script was found in the Egyptian Saddam Hussein sought nuclear Tournament directors were The mood was grim. Gutman Egypt's President Mubarak desert in a papyrus manuscript. weapons. This information has present at each tournament site to had played well, achieving strong made the statement that civil war This version details how Judas only recently surfaced, possibly ensure that no cheating occurred. positions, but had missed some was imminent in Iraq, which in­ was told by Jesus that he would leading Bush's credibility and This requirement was expressed chances to convert his advantage. vited much criticism from Iraqi exceed his fellow disciples by reputation as a "straight-shooter" in the copious amounts of emails Now, the game was coming down leaders. Many others are up in giving Jesus to the authorities. to take dives. that went into organizing the to how wen the could play arms about whether Iraq is in fact event. However, the Midwest's with those few remain- already embroiled in a civil war. Filariasis: Unm Rescue Turned two best players had apparently ing to them, a situation known as spoken Pain Awry planned to compete from a non­ blitz. Advantage rocketed back Iraq Mosque Attack Leaves In Haiti, a parasite-induced Two ski patrol officers at Mam­ approved site. By the time they and forth, as the careful position Dozens condition commonly known for moth Lakes died Saturday after were informed that this was il­ Gutman had built up was trans­ 79 people are left dead after a causing Elephantiasis plagues falling into a crevasse created legal, there was too little time to figured, and moves became wild triple-suicide bombing, which oc­ victims whose systems come to by a volcanic vent. Rescuers had reach the site in time to compete. and strange. Ultimately, his invis­ curred as worshippers were leav­ have trouble draining lymph flu­ originally treated this as a trau­ Hummel and Yanayt were favored ible opponent marched his pieces ing Buratha after Friday prayers. ids. Few surgeons are able to treat matic injury accident, not real­ in both their games. Since the across the board, and Caltech had the illness, which also causes izing that the victims were im­ winner of the match was the team lost. Pakistani Stampede Leaves scrotums to enlarge to the size of mersed in a toxic carbon dioxide with the most wins, this prevented When Gutman finally resigned Trail of Dead basketballs. The hope is that fu­ environment. them from winning the match in and stood up from the computer, The stampede was triggered ture distribution of de-worming the initial time. However, if both he looked like he had just run to when people rushed to help a medication will treat the wide­ Composed from BBC news, NY boards three and four won, they the east coast and back. The phys­ single girl who had tripped at the spread nature of this disease in Times, LA times, and CNN. would force a playoff. ical and mental toll chess takes on However, Caltech was more a player was evident on his face. than up to the task before them. "I hate blitz," he exhaled. Liu lost on board three, but Gut­ Afterwards, the team spoke qui­ man forced a draw in a winning etly and went over their games. Houses Council Dissolves position to clinch the match. In While practicany any other team the other semifinal, the East beat would have regarded finishing such as events and dealings Council member. the South 3-1. second in the nation as a success, BY: JOHN MCNAMARA with the rest of the Caltech The amendment to dissolve At 3 PM, play began again. this one clearly did not. The mood community. the Avery Council passed Like their 2004 finals, this was was sad, but Hummel pointed out A shakeup in the student The power formerly vested with a landslide 57 votes for, a classic East Coast-West Coast that their career as a team had to government of Avery House in the Avery Council has been 3 against and 9 abstains. The battle. Tension was high. While be viewed as a success. This is of has many wondering about consolidated into the Execu­ vote total of 69 votes does the mood oftheir opponents could course an enormous understate­ the future of the mysterious only be guessed at, the Caltech ment. tive Committee, consisting reach quorum. team wanted to win. When these seniors were fresh­ neighbor of the displaced of five officers and headed Other changes in the South Houses. According Play progressed slowly. Some man, no one would have thought by the Avery Chancellor.