MEET the BAND: Ham Bagby
Total Page:16
File Type:pdf, Size:1020Kb
5.16.14 2D FRIDAY , MAY 16 , 2014 | WWW.TUSK205.COM 2D Log on @ INSIDESECTION D editor’s note 205.com o I fi nally decided to like Godzilla when he attacked Megalon by leaping feet fi rst, hang- CONTACT US ing in the air for literally three full seconds, bloated tailpiece scarring the ground, stunt- ed face staring meaninglessly up at studio lights, until his Payless-slippers booties impact S IN EVERY ISSUE Address with a poof onto Megalon’s guy-in-a-rubber-suit suit. 315 28th Ave. Godzilla seems to be taking a nap as he soars, and who can blame him? Who knows how TUSK TUNES 4 Tuscaloosa, AL 35401 long it took bored Toho techies to successfully tow his wire harness, prone and thoroughly FOR RENT 6 or P.O. Box 20587 not ready to kung-fu fi ght, across that blasted desertscape? MOVIES 7 Tuscaloosa, AL 35402-0587 This crushed so many laws of physics that Albert Einstein came back to life enraged and COVER STORY 8 50 feet tall, took one look, shook his furry head, and slowly walked off to drown in the Pa- CALENDAR 12 Hours CROSSWORD 14 Mon.-Fri., 8 a.m.-5 p.m. cifi c. Or Did He? SUDOKU 14 VIDEO GAMES 15 By phone Whenever folks want to deride Hollywood for silliness, I remind them that while Steve Mc- 205-345-0505 Queen was quick-freezing “The Blob” — Or Did He? — in Tokyo the response to the popular- ity of T-Rex-like Gojira was a great honking raging turtle. Online In addition to Daiei Motion Picture company’s Gamera, Gojira spun off a carnival of mon- MOVIE REVIEW www.tusk205.com sters, including, but not limited to, Mothra, Rodan, Anguirus, King Caesar, Jet Jaguar, Varan, Gorosaurus, Kumonga, Zone Fighter, Baragon, Manda, MechaGodzilla, Gigan, Moguera, To a d v e r t i s e Fire Rodan, Mothra Leo, Medical Jet Jaguar, Fire Fighter Jet Jaguar .... For advertising information, Meanwhile, in the U.S., we had to settle for a hot 50-foot tall woman in strategically ripped please call 205-722-0166 clothing, because hey, big and tall stores only stretch so far. Ask Hulk; those purple sweats last no time. Tusk Editor If anything, western movie monsters tend toward the modest, if you discount Tolkien-esque Mark Hughes Cobb fantasy’s dragons, trolls, oliphaunts and so on. Frankenstein’s monster was a gigantic man 205-722-0201 — or concoction of parts of men — in Shelley’s novel 8 feet tall, and in some fi lm editions as [email protected] much as 9 feet. Bruce the great white shark in “Jaws,” at 25 feet and 3 tons, was quite siz- able. Tusk Designer But actual great whites have been said to reach between 21 and 26 feet. And the world’s Keli Goodson tallest man, Robert Wadlow, reached 8 feet, 11.1 inches, according to Guinness. 205-722-0219 In 1980’s “Alligator,” we got, umm, a hulking alligator, 36 feet long, in a script by indie legend John Sayles. That’s more like it, as the largest alligator recorded tipped about 20 Chief Photographer feet. Semi-related is the 1999 comedy-horror fl ick “Lake Placid,” with a 30-foot croco- Robert Sutton dile . [email protected] Speaking of American, how about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, also getting a polish this 205-722-0234 summer (Aug. 8, produced by, speaking of gross horrors, Michael Bay), who stand up to, oh, human size? Well, a leatherback sea turtle, properly mutated to stand, could dwarf those Publication Data dudes. The largest Dermochelys coriacea was measured at 9.8 feet from head to tail, with a Tusk is published each Friday by carapace of 7.2 feet. The Tuscaloosa News. Perhaps the future lies in blending the best of all monster cultures. Producer-director J.J. 7D Abrams created his 2008 “Cloverfi eld” as a new American creature, not Kong, to compete Copyright with a Godzilla toy his son coveted. USA! “MILLION DOLLAR All rights for the content of this Clover stood 25 stories high, with slick, not scaly, skin, covered in dog-sized parasites — ARM” publication shall be the property the better to show creature-human interaction, as mites fell off and leapt onto folks. He didn’t of Tusk. No part hereof may be breathe fi re, but behaved like a cross between a gargantuan elephant/crustacean/lizard, a There’s nothing reproduced without prior quadruped who nonetheless stood on hind legs for periods. He either fell from space, or arose surprising about this written consent. from a thousands-of-years slumber on the ocean depths after the plunge of a satellite. And it charming baseball fi lm, was also a newborn baby, explaining the confusion and rage, and setting up terrifying pos- but that’s OK. Corrections policy sibilities for a sequel when Mama comes looking for Junior, nuked in what used to be Manhat- Tusk welcomes comments and sug- tan. ON THE COVER gestions, as well as information Last year’s “Pacifi c Rim” pitted giant robots manned by human teams to battle-stomp in- about errors that call for corrections. terdimensional invaders, in the form of giant kaiju-like monsters. Next time, blend in ninjas, Godzilla’s 60th anniver- wizards, pirates, Jedi, Scarlett Johannson, dragons, swords, lightsabers and Mecha-Betty- sary is being celebrated Submitting news White, and you’re on to something big. with a brand new big- In most cases, email is the easiest budget American fi lm. method to contact us. Items should be sent to the editor in charge of the See our coverages on appropriate section, as listed above. pages 8-11D. COVER ILLUSTRATION BY ANTHONY BRATINA FRIDAY , MAY 16 , 2014 | WWW.TUSK205.COM 3D THESE TWO JUST GO TOGETHER Check out BBQ & Blues Saturday at the THINGS Historic L&N Station. The event bene- fi ts the DCH Foundation and features food and blues along with a silent auc- TO DO tion. Visit pages 12-13D for details. COMPILED BY TUSK STAFF HEAD OUT WITH FIDO 5 Tuscaloosa Bark in the Park is Satur- day at the Will May Memorial Dog BUY VEGGIES Park. Learn more on pages 12-13D. The Home- grown Alabama Farmers Market sets up shop in its usual spot WANT A NIGHT OUT? Thursday from Check out our Things to Do calendar 3-6 p.m. See on pages 12-13D. It’s loaded with CELEBRATE WITH THEATER where on local and regional events of the bar- Saturday, Theatre Tuscaloosa is hosting pages 12- crawing, music-loving and even a one-night-only show for its 15th anni- 13D. family-oriented varieties. versary. See more on pages 12-13D. LOCALQ&A Jill Price Parsons: Theater and amphitheater manager By Mark Hughes Cobb graduated from UA with a degree in football and in the arts. It is a beautiful Tusk Editor theater, with an emphasis on theater town. management. I made many connec- his week, meet Jill Price Par- tions while there, and that is how I Where are the top places you sons, who helps run big houses have been employed over the years. Q: take visitors and why? T in Tuscaloosa and Birmingham; The Tuscaloosa Amphitheater big houses like the Tuscaloosa Am- Where are you from? A: for concerts, Bryant-Denny phitheater and Red Mountain Theatre Q: Stadium for the excitement and a Company, providing art and enter- This is a difficult question to shaker, Tuscaloosa River Market for tainment for the masses, that is. She’s A: answer. I went to University the farmers’ market, Dirt Cheap for also been seen on University of Ala- Place Elementary School and moved shopping, Taco Casa/Krispy Kreme bama and Theatre Tuscaloosa stages, to California. Graduated from high for eating. in shows such as “Rumors,” “Christ- school in South Carolina, and moved mas Belles” and “Crimes of the back to Tuscaloosa as an adult. Tus- What are your favorite places to Heart.” caloosa was always home to me. I al- Q: eat? What do you order or sug- ways wanted to graduate from UA and gest ordering? Who are you? I finally made it happen. Even though DePalmas, Pasta de Palma; Q: I work in Birmingham every day, I A: Hooligans, Chicken Gyro com- Jill Price Parsons. continue to live in T-town. It is bo with unsweet tea; Don Tonos, A: FILE PHOTO home. Bama Bowl; Surin, Kaboom Maki su- What do you do? Jill Price Parsons works for the shi. Q: Tuscaloosa Amphitheater and Red What do you tell people or House Manager at the Tusca- Mountain Theatre Company, along Q: friends who’ve never been here What are some of the best hang- A: loosa Amphitheatre and Box with other theater-related projects. about living in Tuscaloosa? Q: out locations around town? Office Manager at Red Mountain I tell them, Saturdays in the fall The Alcove International Tav- Theatre Company in Birmingham. As A: is like waking up on Christmas A: ern. the house manager at the Amphithe- service is number one in my book. As morning ... every Saturday. Although I ater, I am in charge of hiring, training the box office manager at RMTC, I am a theater connoisseur, I absolutely What are some of your favorite and managing all the event staff. Pa- am in charge of ticketing, season sub- love football and Tuscaloosa could not Q: local activities? SEE LOCAL | 5D tron experience/safety and customer scribers and the patron experience. I be more perfect of a town.