Te Kimbal Farms Observer Volume 25, Number 10 Season’s Greetings! December 2016 It’s Auld Lang Syne Time for Dolly A Seamless Transition Marketing Director Ending Provided by Melissa a 23-Year Kimball Run Melissa Metcalf, newly appointed Kimball Farms “I leave Kimball Farms with a heavy heart,” Marketing Director, is no stranger to most of us, confessed Dolly Curletti, Director of Marketing who, having served as Dolly Curletti's capable assistant after 23 years of dedicated service, has decided to for over four years. She is a native and lifelong retire at the end of this year. She is proud of her resident of Berkshire County and a graduate of local accomplishments here, one of which is her assistance schools. Her father, an entrepreneur involved in a in opening PineHill. variety of enterprises, Dolly’s path to Kimball Farms put Melissa in charge of was a circuitous one. She was Pietro's, an Italian born and raised in Pittsfield. restaurant formerly in When Pittsfield General and Lee. (One of the people St. Luke’s Hospital merged she hired became her and became Berkshire Medical husband, Will.) Center, she became the buyer After her father’s death of medical supplies, a position the restaurant was closed she held for 10 years. A and Melissa obtained a marriage and the birth of two real estate license, sons interrupted her career working for Century 21, until she was divorced and for which she managed went back to work at BMC as three offices with a 15- the Administrative Assistant to person staff. She the President of the hospital. continues to maintain her Melissa and Dolly confer The hospital, now part of license and remains Berkshire Health System, active in the field. She is still on call at Canyon necessitated twice a week calls to Kimball Farms, Ranch, for which she had worked in Reception. which was being built, to report on “start-up” sales. When the real estate market slowed down, she “Little did I know I’d be working at Kimball Farms looked for another job and saw the listing for an in the future,” she recalled. opening at Kimball Farms. With her background and She left BMC to open a candy store in experience, she was a “natural.” Williamstown, “Goodies,” followed by a second in As Dolly's assistant she has done an outstanding job. Pittsfield, which she operated for four years. As an Dolly was a great mentor and trained Melissa in all avid sewer, her next entrepreneurial adventure was aspects of the work.Theirs was an ideal partnership conducted from her home; custom curtains and and they worked seamlessly together. Melissa loves draperies. She continually enrolled in marketing her job and the challenges it poses, working with courses at Berkshire Community College, after prospective residents, assessing their needs and which she was hired by Kimball Farms. (continued on page 2) (continued on page 2) 2 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016

(Melissa, continued from page 1) (Dolly, continued from page 1) determining the best options for each applicant. She While Dolly was employed at BMC she became knows that transitions are not easy and tries to make reacquainted with her now husband of 31 years, Dr. the changes as painless as possible. She loves the Eugene Curletti, a general and vascular surgeon. Dr. warm environment at Kimball Farms and the Curletti brought three boys from a previous marriage teamwork among the various departments. to the family, which consisted now of a 15-year-old, She sees the target market for Kimball Farms two 7-year-olds and two 9-year-olds. While Dolly changing and with it new approaches to marketing. and Gene grew up in the same neighborhood and More second home owners are deciding to make went to elementary school together, they attended Kimball Farms their retirement home and more separate high schools, Dolly to St. Joe’s and Gene to children are considering placement for their Pittsfield High, and really didn’t see each other at the parents. She appreciates the challenge of keeping up time. A dinner date after they finally became re- occupancy of the 224 units making up the Walker acquainted at the hospital was the beginning of their Street campus. life together. Biggest competition, she feels, comes from home When Dolly was asked what she planned on doing in care agencies and beneficiaries of long-term care retirement, she could barely recite her plans fast insurance. She hopes to continue and build on enough. She feels very lucky that all her sons and present strategies – running events which attract new their families live in the area, including her ten people, involving community organizations, case grandchildren, the oldest being 12. She loves to managers at hospitals, clubs etc. Strategies have cook and entertain and enjoys her perennial and changed; there is less emphasis on print advertising vegetable garden, weather permitting. An avid and more use of social media and digital means. knitter, she travels to conventions for knitters and hopes to teach the craft. And probably not lastly, she With her busy work schedule, this high-energy new intends to take piano lessons again, an instrument Marketing Director still finds time for outside she studied as a child. activities. She resides with her husband in Lenox, together with her youngest son, 22, who is an Dolly is pleased that she is leaving the Kimball electrician, and two gorgeous Dobermans. Her Farms Marketing Department in the very capable oldest son, 24, a mechanic, lives nearby. A favorite hands of Melissa Scarafoni Metcalf, Dolly’s assistant pastime is hiking the Berkshire trails with their dogs for 4 1/2 years. and she enjoys the gym, especially weight lifting. We wish Dolly a fulfilling retirement and if free time Her husband, a Culinary Institute of America gets to be overwhelming, maybe a quiet 9 to 5 can be graduate, is Food Services Director for Berkshire found for her at Kimball Farms. A warm thank you Life, so guess who does the cooking at home? and farewell. Another challenge and priority right now is finding a Bernie Handler replacement for her present position and she is busy interviewing applicants. Let’s hope that the successful candidate will live up to the standards of his/her predecessor. Just as Melissa was a natural for In Memoriam four-plus years in her present job, she is a natural now to follow in Dolly's footsteps. We know that she William Simons will do well and continue to be the friendly and March 13, 1928 to Nov. 4, 2016 welcoming face of Kimball Farms. Congratulations and best wishes to Melissa on this Grace Johnson new step in her life. August 17, 1918 to Nov. 5, 2016 Margot Yondorf December 2016 The Kimball Farms Observer 3 The “Pussycat” Who Lived amid Spies Kissa Guilsher’s given name is Catherine, but she worked as a linguist for the American Consul in prefers “Kissa” (pronounced KEY-sa), a shortened Belgrade as well as the local office of the United version of the Russian word for “pussycat,” and the Nations. affectionate name she was called by her Her parents put all the family’s furniture and grandmother. possessions out on the street for sale and used the Kissa’s family story reads like a novel, with money to buy jewelry to take with them as they desperate escapes, deportations, refugee camps, became refugees again. The jewelry was sewn into statelessness and spy adventures. The story begins in the belly of Kissa’s teddy bear, and she had strict Russia. After the revolution against the czar in 1917, instructions to hold the bear in a very firm grip. The both her father’s and mother’s families, who were ruse was effective, Kissa says, although the bear still descended from Russian nobility, fled Russia, her has a scar. Of course, the bear is a star among her mother from St. Petersburg to their estates in Crimea possessions. and her father, an officer in one of the czar’s Refugee camps were opened in Germany but quickly regiments, to filled as thousands fled in the chaos. The family was Poland. among the first arrivals at a new Anglo-American As the revolution camp in Trieste, Italy. The camp was a former spread across the German-Italian crematorium, The family lived in one country, it was room with two bunk beds, a tiny table, two chairs clear that they and a window with a view of the crematorium’s oven h a d t o f l e e , for a year and a half while they waited for sponsors leaving estates, and entry visas for the United States, which finally w e a l t h a n d arrived in December 1951. everything else During their time in the refugee camp, Kissa, who b e h i n d . was already fluent in Russian, French, Serbo- Eventually both Croation and German, studied English and Italian, of her parents and surprisingly, ballet, which she had always with thousands preferred to formal schooling. Among the refugees in of other refugees Trieste were her former teacher and the prima w e n t t o ballerina of the Belgrade ballet, also exiled because B e l g r a d e , Kissa with her teddybear she was Russian. Yu g o s l a v i a , where they were welcomed by King Alexander I. The family was sponsored by a couple on Long Soon after they settled in, Kissa’s parents met and Island, and they arrived in the United States in twins were born: Kissa and Marian. Kissa does not December of 1951 with the bear, which still carried remember much about life in Belgrade in the years his treasure in his belly! It would take another five before World War 2, but the war years are still vivid, years before they could become citizens. with falling bombs, hiding and fleeing to the After a short time on Long Island, during which her countryside to survive. After Germany lost the war, mother worked at the United Nations, the family the Soviets occupied Yugoslavia, but Kissa’s parents moved to Washington, D.C. Kissa’s mother insisted shielded the children from the political situation. that her daughters complete their education, which However, in 1950 the situation changed dramatically. had been interrupted and complicated by the When the Russian occupation of Yugoslavia ended, upheavals in their lives. They completed their high the dictator Tito broke with the Soviet bloc, revoking school credits and went on to college. Kissa majored the Yugoslav citizenship status of all Russians in the in French Literature at George Washington country. Kissa’s parents lost their jobs, she was University, graduating with honors in 1957. removed from some classes in school and the family (Continued on next page) had three days to leave the country. Her mother had 4 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016

(Guilsher, continued) Holiday Things to Do In 1955, Kissa met John Guilsher, whose family had The holiday season is upon us and here is a also fled from Russia and settled in America. He was cornucopia of things to do in our surrounding working for the National Security Administration at community. the time. Once she finished college and became a The annual Festival of Trees at the Berkshire citizen in 1957, they were married in London, where Museum is now on display through December 31. John had been sent by his new employer, the Central The theme this year is movies. Virtually next Intelligence Agency.The family moved often: son door, at the Colonial Theatre, the Berkshire Theatre Michael was born in Washington, daughter Anne Group is presenting its annual production of Dickens' (Anya ) in Oslo, Norway, and second daughter A Christmas Carol December 10 to 22. There will Alexandra (Sasha) in The Hague, the Netherlands. be a van on Sunday, December 4, for the Ghent Anya, who is married to a Frenchman, now lives Playhouse production of their 17th annual panto, The nearby in Tyringham, and Sasha is a massage Turn of the Scrooge. The following Sunday, therapist at Canyon Ranch in Lenox. Michael is a December 11, there will be a van for the late financial advisor in Birmingham, Alabama. afternoon Ceremony of Lessons and Carols at the In 1977, they were posted to the Soviet Union, going Williams College Chapel. Sign up in the Trips books to Moscow “with open minds” Kissa says, in spite of for either of these events. their family’s history. Once they arrived, John The first weekend in December will also see became the case officer for a Soviet agent who gave Christmas Walks in Lenox and Williamstown. In secret information to the United States. Even though Lenox, on Friday, December 2, at 6 p.m., the Kissa’s role in the work was minor, there were many weekend will start off with the town tree lighting in challenges: watching for surveillance and creating Lilac Park, and shops will be open until 8. Then, diversions, trying to remember license plate starting at the Chamber of Commerce office on numbers, and instructing the children about what Housatonic Street, you can join the second annual they could say and do, and what was a definite NO. Santa Bar Crawl. Tickets for the Bar Crawl can be Their children were all in school in the United bought by calling 637-3646. Proceeds are donated to States, but came to Moscow for summer vacations, the Lenox Community Center. and were curious about their parents’ activities. Saturday, the 3rd, all stores in downtown Lenox will That part of Kissa’s story is included in a book called be open 11 to 5 with street entertainment and The Billion Dollar Spy, by Washington Post refreshments available, and Nejaime’s will be correspondent David Hoffman. The book has been hosting their holiday extravaganza tasting party. The translated into Russian, and the copies sold out in Trinity Church Holiday Fair and Silver Tea, from one day in Moscow, Hoffman has reported to Kissa. 10am to 3pm, will feature delicious lunch and tea She will be presenting a copy (in English) to the treats, African crafts, and local crafts such as party Kimball Farms library. dresses for American Girl dolls. And last, but She has had lots of experience tackling new certainly not least, don't forget our local talent, the environments, but Kissa decided to move here now Kimball Singers, and their holiday concert on while she was still able to adjust easily. She has been Sunday, the 18th, at 7:30 in the auditorium. pleased with the helpful and pleasant people she has Watch the bulletin board for information about New met at Kimball Farms. The art classes have been a Year's Eve, and happy holidays! special pleasure for her. She loves to do Chinese brush painting, which she learned in the difficult Ginny Fletcher time after her husband died. It is a bit like calligraphy, but with birds and flowers instead of characters. To hear more of Kissa’s amazing stories, contact her at 7156. Susan Dana December 2016 The Kimball Farms Observer 5 Hats Off for Fashions That Go Hatless Originally hats were worn mainly to help keep heads they are naughty. With fashion, what comes around warm in winter and cool in summer. Except for goes around.” She recalled carrying hatboxes on her special occasions, women now are likely to rely on travels, and even wig boxes. She and an attorney new hairdos rather than hats. owned an art gallery on Madison Avenue where she Among women in Kimball Farms, few are choosing met Donald Trump a few times, “more in a business to wear hats.“I’m really not a hat person,” said Mary nature than personally”. Aylor, who has lived in Kimball Farms for more than When Edith said her grandfather was in the ostrich three years. “I feel that I don’t have a hat face,” she feather business, it reminded me that my grandfather said. “A hat face is one with high cheekbones. My was a very successful milliner in St. Louis. He and face is round, and is not good for wearing hats.” his brother specialized in beautiful, big hats for Mary added that she women, many of them made with priceless feathers got rid of her few hats and creative designs. When the Titanic sank in 1915, years ago, and now it took with it two tons of ostrich feathers. A large doesn’t wear one even part of the shipment had been destined for my in winter or summer. grandfather’s business, so he had to go to work to get “With a wardrobe of feathers somewhere else for a while. at least 50 outfits, I I have no photos of my specialize in any style grandmother wearing a s a f a s h i o n i s t a , his wonderful, big hats wearing nothing but with feathers, although designer clothes,” she t h e r e i s o n e v e r y said. spectacular hat she As for her favorite wore at the St. Louis styles, Mary replied, International “Nowadays Exposition in 1904. I Mary Aylor e v e r y t h i n g a n d wore a hat made of blue anything, short pants, f e a t h e r s f o r m y long pants, tight pants, loose pants, we women are wedding in 1951, and free to wear anything we please. For the first time we never put it on again. don’t have to worry about the length of skirts or The popularity of pants, stretch or spandex. Fashion today is good for women’s hats shrank to every size.” the point where there Edith Talbert has been a resident of PineHill for were very few celebrity going on 12 years. She spends every winter in milliners left other than Florida, wearing hats mainly when she’s in the sunny Edith Talbert Daché, Carnegie and a South. few others. Today, a Lilly Daché hat is on sale on Ebay for $450. In her Encouraged by an aunt, Edith studied at a fashion heyday her work attracted stage and screen stars, school in New York and began working at 16 at B. including Ginger Rogers, Marlene Dietrich, Carole Altman’s, teaching teenagers styles and getting them Lombard, Joan Crawford, Marian Davies and ready for the runways at fashion shows. “It was a lot Gertrude Lawrence. She also created Carmen of fun,” she said, “but there were no runways for Miranda’s towering turbans with birds, and fruit, and me.” yet more birds, and more fruit. Comparing fashions in those days with those of the Hattie Carnegie was another millinery star back in 21st century, she said, “Back then they dressed like 1928, when Lucille Ball was an unknown actress. they wanted to be naughty, now they dress because (continued on next page) 6 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016

(Hats, continued) Let’s Hear It for Meats, Carnegie ordered her to dye her brown hair blond, Salads and Those Veggies and Lucille complied. Carnegie created the Women’s Soups, salads, meat and roasted vegetables are top Army Corps uniform for WACS in World War 2, for dinner choices for 40 Kimball Farms diners who which she received the Congressional Medal of participated in a recent food survey conducted by Freedom. members of the Food and Nutrition Committee. The John P. John, a famous Hollywood milliner, designed survey, completed during the first two weeks in hats for many movie stars. His most famous work November, was designed to give residents a chance became designs for all of Vivien Leigh’s hats in to voice their reactions to new menus, shorter Gone With the Wind. periods between seasonal menu changes, and Designers have produced many new styles through updated recipes, as recently instituted by Chef Mike the years, especially since the 1920s when women Paglier and his staff. bobbed their hair. Hats have lost favor even for Additional top-rated favorites by survey participants weddings and worship services. included poached salmon, roast chicken and, not Hats, whether men’s or women’s, have more or less surprisingly, ice cream and cookies. Favorites, gone out of style, according to researchers who have almost everyone hopes, will be served more often. discussed fashions on the internet. More corn on the cob in season, please – and more baked apples. article and photos by Claire Cox Highest praise was reserved for the wait staff – a resounding “super wonderful” from almost every survey participant. Music & Entertainment The survey also indicates that diners visit the Pub Monday Dec 5 7:30pm when they find the dinner menu does not appeal to Royal Garden Jazz Band them or when they want to join friends. Some diners Saturday Dec 10 7:30pm estimate they choose the Pub for dinner from once to Gramercy Trio twice a month up to four times a month. Monday Dec 12 7:30pm In addition to commenting on the dinner served on Education Committee Lecture the specific date each survey was given, diners were also asked to describe other noteworthy food Wednesday Dec 14 7:30pm experiences. Raves included a recently served Fred Moyer Jazz Trio vegetable crepe, crisper veggies, innovative salads Sunday December 18 7:30pm and various desserts. Some diners also wished for KF Singers Holiday Concert more varied vegetable dishes, fewer frozen vegetables and more dark meat chicken. Monday Dec 19 7:30pm Professor V. Ferraro Lecture One diner summed it all up: “Great food! – better than home!” Wednesday Dec 21 11am Monument Mountain Jazz Band and Madrigals Joyce Barrow, Food and Nutrition Chairman Monday Dec 26 7:30pm Education Committee Lecture Movies: all at 7:30pm Sat.12/3, Wed.12/7, Fri. 12/16, Sat.12/17, Wed 12/21, Sat.12/24, Wed.12/28 December 2016 The Kimball Farms Observer 7 Two Couples to Present President’s Report: Scandinavian Travelogue We Went over the Goal Have you always wanted to go to Scandinavia but Congratulations to you all for the very successful never managed to? Well, now is your chance to do Staff Appreciation fund drive which raised even so vicariously, for on December 12 the Danas and more than the goal. We all recognize and appreciate the Fenns will present a travelogue of their the wonderful staff at Kimball Farms, who make our respective trips this past summer. Both couples lives so comfortable, delicious and interesting, and traveled by ship and by rail, with very similar this is a tangible way to show the staff how much we itineraries but traveling in opposite directions. value their good work. Many thanks to Tad Evans The Fenns started out in Finland with a few days in and his committee for leading the fund drive again Lapland, famous for the Sami (more popularly this year. The committee will write about 300 checks known as Laplanders) and reindeer. From there they to be distributed at a festive party in the auditorium proceeded to Norway for a coastal voyage traveling on December 7 from 2 to 4 p.m. Please plan to come northward from Kirkenes, a stone;s throw from the to thank the staff in person. Russian border, around the “top” of Norway with a At our Residents Association meeting on Monday, stop in Tromso and then crossing the Arctic Circle December 5, at 1:30, we will present the 2017 southward to Trondheim and eventually to Bergen. budget. In January, we will elect officers and From Bergen their journey by rail and coach took councilors for the coming year. The dates of the them to Oslo, the Norwegian capital, with a side trip December Council meeting and the January on the very steep Flam railroad with spectacular Residents Association meeting have been changed views of waterfalls. because of the Christmas and New Year’s holidays this year. The December Council meeting will be on Geiranger Fjord Tuesday, January 3, and the Resident Association meeting will be on Monday, January 9. Please make a note of this, and consult the calendar and TV listings for reminders. Have you been to a balance-improving POD session yet? How about signing up to mentor a student at Morningside School? Call Sharon Lazerson at 7043 for details. Thanks to Lynn Lak and Sharon for telling us about both opportunities at the November meeting. May your holidays be joyous! The Danas’ tour started on the Swedish Islands of Susan Dana, President Gotland and Faro (where Ingmar Bergman lived and shot several movies). After brief visits to Stockholm, Copenhagen, Oslo and Bergen, their fjord voyage Color Your World started in Bergen and ended in Kirkenes. As the days grow shorter and darker, a touch of color These voyages included stops at villages and of might be just what is needed. Please stop by the course enjoyed spectacular views of the fjords for Conference Room to see our late fall, early winter which Norway is famous. exhibit “Color Your World” – a selection of especially colorful paintings from Art in the Halls. Do come and see the Danas’ and Fenns’ beautiful This exhibit will be in view until mid-January. slides on December 12, at 7:30 Mary Aylor and Stephanie Beling Elske Smith 8 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016 Kimball Looks Outward Why the Safety Pin? in New Activity Series You may see some of us wearing safety pins on our clothing. It is a small way to indicate support for the In conversation with Sharon Lazerson for The many groups who suffer harassment and hatred from Observer, I was impressed by the dreams she has as groups in our society who are against anyone, she assumes a new position as the Community anything, different from their concept of what our Outreach Coordinator for Kimball Farms. Sharon has country should be. We ask you to join us. been the director of activities for the residents of the LEP program. In her new position Sharon will now direct a program that she describes as “a way of bringing Kimball Farms residents into the outer community separateness.” How easy it is for us to drive through the entrance of Kimball and leave our relationship to the “outside” community behind. Sharon has been mining the The idea stemmed from action in the UK following treasures of service and education in the area to the Brexit vote. Many people took up the wearing of inform us and to provide opportunities for those who a safety pin to indicate support for immigrants and wish to join in available programs. refugees. In this country the pin indicates an Sharon majored in education and worked in openness to all minorities and any who feel anxiety Switzerland, Vienna and Germany; she taught and fear about government policies. The pin says: “I kindergarten in a Waldorf school in Maine. Sharon will listen to you and support you.” found her passion as she visited a dementia patient A statement that appeared in The Huffington Post and over time realized that caring for such people explains the aims: was her calling; she worked at Melbourne Place and came to Kimball Farms when the LEP program “Safety pin = solidarity. By fastening a safety pin to began. their clothing, people are declaring themselves allies to groups who have been maligned by the rising Sharon now begins her new role and is hard at work nativism and hate in the US, to show that they stand developing contacts for outreach. She has assembled in solidarity with anyone who might be afraid. I wear a rich and varied list of speakers and groups a safety pin so that immigrants, refugees, associated with health care, cultural programs and LGBTQIAP [lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, other activities; our current program with Lenox questioning or queer, intersex, asexual, pansexual], High students is due to Sharon's dream. There will and anyone else threatened by hate and fear- be a program of African drumming on December 6 mongering may see that I care, and that I will do all I and, in the future, a panel of Muslim students from can to combat xenophobia, racism, sexism and Williams College. heterosexism.” Kimball will also welcome a speaker series in I have a supply of pins for those who want to stand February from the Berkshire Human Rights with us in solidarity. organization. The Spiritual Round Table will continue to develop its program. Sharon welcomes Dorothea Nelson program suggestions for the future; she may be reached at Ext. 7043. Our new outreach program The Christmas wreaths promises a rich, diverse and needed connection to shown in this issue the Berkshires. were displayed Gwen Sears last Christmas on residents’ front doors December 2016 The Kimball Farms Observer 9 An Art in the Halls Favorite young girl promised to the King of France. The watercolor depicts the spot (Finistiére Nord) where a small tower named for Mary Stuart is located.” Not much of the above is evident to the viewer. What the artist offers is not a pretty picture of Roscoff but his sense of its spirit. It’s properly French, or French- Expressionist, more reminiscent of Dufy than, say, Leger or Bonnard. Quietly confident, light-hearted, spontaneous, sketchy in places, very wet, transparent — that’s its appeal. Take a look!. Roland Ginzel

Pour the Bubbly! Across the hall from Apartment 213 in Stockbridge, It’s in the works. The Kimball Farms New Year’s next to a Paris Exposition poster, you’ll find an Eve Committee is busy planning a fun and delicious original watercolor that is easy to overlook — but evening to see the Old Year out and the New Year in. shouldn’t be. It’s the work of Andre Patte Mary Aylor, Stephanie Beling, Tad Evans, Bernie (pronounced PAT), 1904-1966, who was born in Handler and Bill Jones have been busy arranging for Burgundy, France. According to Suzanne Bach, the our entertainment and refreshments. The committee owner, “It represents the Breton port Roscoff, a is planning an evening different from other New lovely spot surrounded by small islands, with a Year’s Eve celebrations here at Kimball Farms. microclimate that supports its luxurious vegetation. Notices will be going out soon to all Independent It is also the spot where Mary Stuart landed as a residents describing how you can participate in the fun, so keep checking your cubby. And start getting in the mood! Bernie Handler Birthdays Twenty-four residents celebrate birthdays in December. There is a 20 year spread between the youngest and oldest celebrant. December birthdays “belong” to: Jacqueline Crosky, Jeanne Crist, Catherine “Kissa” Guilsher, Pauline Meyer, Anne Nesbit, Eileen Henle, Sylvia Pellish, Norma Ruffer, Barbara Spoehr, Claire Cox, Gertrude “Trude” Moskowitz, Helen Strachan, Edward “Ed” Dinowitz, Nancy Nirenberg, Stanley Feld, John Kittredge, Gwendolyn “Gwen” Gilbert, Ruth White, Mary Anne Kirby, Constance “Connie” Montgomery, Jean Maas, Five witches and a Jack-o-Lantern Hannah Valles, George Keator greeted evening diners at the October 28 and Ronald “Ron” Trabulsi Halloween party Happy Birthday to each of you!! 10 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016 Annoying, Isn’t It? It Really Doesn’t Matter Sarah Jessica Parker, best known for her role as nervous system, repeat Rule No. 1, and just relax and Carrie in “Sex and the City,” said recently in an enjoy the scenery for an additional minute or two. interview, when asked about the success of her long When on “hold” for a long time, also think Rule No. (by celebrity standards) marriage to fellow actor 1 and examine your options. Either hang up and call Matthew Broderick: “The things that annoy me don’t back at a less busy time or put the phone on speaker matter.” This sentence, so brief, so clear, seemed to and continue doing what you were doing until offer the wisdom of the ages; the solution to the someone picks up. The important thing is to avoid onslaught of frustration, anxiety, stress and most at the stress reaction, the frustrations, anxiety and all the minor annoyances that clutter up one’s day. impatience of having to deal with things not going As I sit here writing this article, I am on hold on the your way. telephone waiting to cancel a no longer needed What this is really about is recognizing the feeling of insurance policy, with once again no internet annoyance before it grabs hold. Label it, investigate connection to allow me to do this online, and a it and then let it go or take an appropriate action to screeching, whining sound coming from nearby get a better result. construction. The leaf blower that woke me this morning has fortunately moved on. There are other helpful steps to take to reduce annoyance and as in so many other health issues, Yesterday, I was behind a slow-moving vehicle for regular exercise tops the list. Exercise creates a several miles on Route 183, tried to get one of my calmer and more relaxed mindset. It also releases credit cards unblocked that had been stopped by an brain endorphins –- the “feel good” chemicals. If you unnecessary fraud alert, found two erroneous charges are in a more challenging situation –- perhaps a on another credit card and had to make two disturbance in a relationship –- going for a walk may confrontational telephone calls to get these charges diffuse the tension and offer an opportunity to think reversed. Is it just me, or are these sorts of daily of a different approach. minor annoyances fairly common? As I mentioned earlier, self-talk is very helpful. So back to Sarah Jessica Parker! The truth is that Whether it is remembering that “the things that these annoyances really don’t matter and it is this annoy me don’t matter,” or Rule No. 1, “It doesn’t thought takes the frustration, anxiety and stress matter,” or another of my favorites, “So what, who away. It is a matter of self-talk and in my case very cares,” –- say it out loud. Than force your lips up helpful. into a smile and, guaranteed, you will feel better. To “annoy” means to rouse to impatience or anger –- Some years ago two of my closest friends and I got not quite anger, but just on the edge. Muscles in the together for lunch once a month, specifically to talk shoulders, neck and jaw tighten up, breathing about all the things that annoyed us –- jobs, becomes more rapid and shallow, and worst of all is husbands, kids, not enough time, too much clutter, the slow drip, drip of cortisol (the stress hormone) on and on, and we offered each other advice and into our blood stream. We all know how unhealthy comfort. We always left feeling better. Unfortunately, this is and how it predisposes to heart attack, stroke one of us now lives in Florida, another is deceased and yes, even memory loss. and I am here. My Florida friend visits in the One of my favorite books is Roger Rosenblatt’s summer, we talk on the phone, but it's not the same. Rules for Aging. I have read this so many times that I If anyone here would like to join me in finding can now just say a number and that rule comes solutions to the annoyances that assail us all too immediately to mind. The most important for me is frequently, please call. But we must remember, “The Rule No. 1, “It doesn’t matter.” When behind a slow- things that annoy us don’t matter.” For some of us moving vehicle (unless it is an urgent medical however, there are now issues that do matter. These problem), you can just say Rule No. 1, take a deep are not the minor annoyances referred to in this breath, which activates the calming part of the article. Stephanie Beling, M.D. December 2016 The Kimball Farms Observer 11 Seeing West Point The election: RIP Our trip to the United States Military Academy at (You may have seen these on the Internet, but they West Point took place the day before the first honor our recent election.) snowstorm of the season, so while cool, the day was If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given bright and sunny. Happily, we traveled in our new us candidates. (Jay Leno) van, with its huge, clear windows. The problem with political jokes is they get elected. The views to Highland Falls, N.Y., were spectacular (Henry Cate VII) as we sped along the Storm King Highway. As we waited for clearance into the Academy grounds, we We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones were amazed at the number of buses of Chinese to public office. (Aesop) tourists. A well-informed guide boarded our If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in comfortable van and showed us around campus. We these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be got off the van twice. First, we visited the impressive any inducement to go to heaven. (Will Rogers) non-denominational chapel; then we stopped at the Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river. (Nikita Khrushchev) When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it. (Clarence Darrow) Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. (John Quinton) Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. (Author unknown) Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the Our tour admires the Chapel poor and campaign funds from the rich, by Parade Grounds and the “million-dollar view” with promising to protect each from the other. its Civil War monument. (Oscar Ameringer) Twice a week, the cadets wear their camouflage fatigues, so there was no Long Grey Line visible for us. It was difficult to see them on the Parade Trips Grounds as they lined up for lunch. West Point Friday Dec. 2. 9:45am bus graduates and gives to our country around 1,000 Holiday Shopping – Holyoke Mall cadet-leaders each year. We dined at the Thayer Sunday Dec 4 1:00pm bus Hotel on campus. It was a long but worthwhile trip. Ghent Playhouse photo and article by Adelene Quigley Saturday Dec 10 12:15pm bus Met Opera - Mahaiwe Sunday Dec 11 2:30pm bus “Lessons & Carols” – Williams College Tuesday Dec 13 5:15pm bus Holiday Dinner – Haflinger Haus 12 The Kimball Farms Observer December 2016 Mr. Reed and Lena Horne at Tanglewood It was Lena Horne Day at Tanglewood, with two by an African American church group, which might performances scheduled. My husband and I were possibly give him a ride to Boston. ushering and arrived early for the second shift, with During intermission I went to search for the bus and visiting sister in tow, and found the earlier volunteers finally found it among dozens of vehicles, but no and a whole entourage huddled around a handsome, driver in sight. End of concert, husband had gentle, elderly black gentleman. disappeared in search of a divorce lawyer and a This was Mr. Reed, 99 years old, severely replacement for me while sister went to find a handicapped, who had arrived from Roxbury, Mass., wheelchair for Mr. Reed. I located the driver of the that morning by bus from Boston and taxi from Boston bus, who confirmed that we would have to Lenox, walking with two canes. Although he had get permission from the minister in charge of the only a lawn group to have Mr. Reed admitted. pass, he had Sister appeared with wheelchair and the minister made himself finally appeared with his parishioners. He was less comfortable in than receptive to my suggestion that he take Mr. a good seat in Reed back to Boston. Sister and I tried to appeal to the Shed. He his charitable nature and also assured him that Mr. was in love, he Reed, once in Boston, would have no problem told us, with getting home and would not be a burden to his Lena Horne group. He relented rather reluctantly; we got Mr. and was taking Reed on the bus; found husband, made him tear up i n t h e t w o divorce paper and dismiss my replacement, and went “shows.” He had become the poster child for the home and lived happily ever after, except for the section patrons, who had fallen in love with him and time when I picked up ... but that’s another story. were providing him with food, drink and conversation. The rightful owner of his seat had not Margot Yondorf dispossessed him and we promised the departing crew that not only would we look out for Mr. Reed, but we would make sure that he could keep “his” seat. The Kimball Farms Observer is printed and Noticing his small overnight case, I inquired where published by and for the residents of Kimball Farms he was staying, but NO, said he, he was going home to Roxbury. And how, asked I, would he do EDITOR PRODUCTION that? Well, said he, the same way he had come. He Andy Pincus Ned Dana would call a taxi and then take the bus to Boston. A Michelle Rosier taxi, the bus to Boston at 11 o’clock at night on a EDITORIAL STAFF: Sunday? No way! Consternation! What to do? Stephanie Beling, Susan Dana, Sister and I decided that we could not leave him at Ned Dana, Virginia Fletcher, Bernie Handler, Tanglewood and we would take him home with us Gwen Sears, Elske Smith, Margot Yondorf for the night and get him to a bus in the PHOTOGRAPHS: morning. Husband was less than enthusiastic, but Claire Cox, Ned Dana, Adelene Quigley when presented with the alternate solution – that he drive Mr. Reed home to Roxbury after the concert – CONTRIBUTORS THIS MONTH: Mary Aylor, Joyce Barrow, Claire Cox, this met with even less enthusiasm and muttered Hank and Jeanie Fenn, Roland Ginzel. Eileen Henle, threats about a divorce. Just before the concert Dorothea Nelson, Adelene Quigley started, one of Mr. Reed’s guardian angels came running with the news that there was a bus, chartered