Disenchanted Lives Apostasy and Ex-Mormonism Among The
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© 2015 Edward Marshall Brooks III ALL RIGHTS RESERVED DISENCHANTED LIVES: APOSTASY AND EX•MORMONISM AMONG THE LATTER•DAY SAINTS By EDWARD MARSHALL BROOKS III A dissertation submitted to the Graduate School•New Brunswick Rutgers, The State University of New Jersey In partial fulfillment of the requirements For the degree of Doctor of Philosophy Graduate Program in Anthropology Written under the direction of Dorothy L. Hodgson And approved by _____________________________________ _____________________________________ _____________________________________ _____________________________________ New Brunswick, New Jersey October, 2015 ABSTRACT OF THE DISSERTATION Disenchanted Lives: Apostasy and Ex-Mormonism among the Latter-day Saints by EDWARD MARSHALL BROOKS III Dissertation Director: Dorothy L. Hodgson This dissertation ethnographically explores the contemporary phenomenon of religious apostasy (that is, rejecting ones religious faith or church community) among current and former members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (aka Mormons). Over the past decade there has been increasing awareness in both the institutional church and the popular media that growing numbers of once faithful church members are becoming dissatisfied and disenchanted with their faith. In response, throughout Utah post-Mormon and ex-Mormon communities have begun appearing offering a social community and emotional support for those transitioning out of the church. Through fifteen months of ethnographic research in the state of Utah I investigated these events as they unfolded in people’s everyday lives living in a region of the country wholly dominated by the Mormon Church’s presence. In particular, I conducted participant observation in church services, ex-Mormon support group meetings, social networks and family events, as well as in-depth interviews with current and former church members. Each chapter of this dissertation explores the causes and effects of religious disenchantment as they reverberate across multiple registers: how an overabundance of memory about Mormonism’s sacred history has led to people’s estrangement from its religious life- world; how despite rejecting beliefs on a cognitive basis the effects of those beliefs can ii still linger in people’s sense of embodied self; how apostates’ uncanny familiarity provokes current church members’ attempts to expel them from families and neighborhoods; and how the loss of belief is negotiated through attempts to both identity and dis-identify with the Mormon community. iii Table of Contents ABSTRACT OF THE DISSERTATION .................................................................................................................................. ii List of Illustrations ................................................................................................................................................................ v Introduction ....................................................................................................................................................................... 1 The Restoration ................................................................................................................................................................ 7 The Mormon Moment ....................................................................................................................................................... 9 Religious disaffection ......................................................................................................................................................12 The secular subject ..........................................................................................................................................................18 My Own (Non)Religious Subjectivity ................................................................................................................................27 Fieldwork among the Saints ..............................................................................................................................................30 Chapter Overview ...........................................................................................................................................................41 Ch 1: Digging Too Deep: History, Faith, and the Crisis of Memory ......................................................................................46 Sacred History/Nostalgic Identities ....................................................................................................................................50 Deep history as dangerous ................................................................................................................................................57 Staying in the “shallow end” of faith ..................................................................................................................................63 Digging too deep .............................................................................................................................................................74 The Mormon Moment and digital depth ..........................................................................................................................75 Ryan: Betrayed by deep faith .........................................................................................................................................81 Sherri: Betrayed by the Book of Mormon ........................................................................................................................91 Chris, Derek, and Beth: Moral Disillusionment ................................................................................................................. 103 Chris and the Mountain Meadows Massacre ................................................................................................................. 103 Derek and the curse of Cain ........................................................................................................................................ 107 Beth and plural marriage ............................................................................................................................................ 110 Ch 2: Disenchantment, Loss, and World-Collapse ............................................................................................................. 117 An unsheltered existence ................................................................................................................................................ 123 Divine emplacement ...................................................................................................................................................... 127 The Perils of Uncertainty ................................................................................................................................................ 133 Sacred Self and Identity.................................................................................................................................................. 137 Loss ............................................................................................................................................................................. 144 Split-Self and Hyperreflexivity ........................................................................................................................................ 147 Someone to show him the way ........................................................................................................................................ 152 Ch 3: Embodied Deconversions: Sex and the Spirit ........................................................................................................... 160 Sexual Sins ................................................................................................................................................................... 163 Sacred Bodies, Sacred Sex .............................................................................................................................................. 165 “I lost my body to the Church” ........................................................................................................................................ 173 Freeing sexual subjectivities ........................................................................................................................................... 176 Repossessing the body ................................................................................................................................................... 183 Fantasizing Freedom ...................................................................................................................................................... 188 Feeling the Spirit ........................................................................................................................................................... 194 An encounter with the spirit ............................................................................................................................................ 197 Disenchanting emotions ................................................................................................................................................. 200 Ch 4: Stigmatizing Apostasy ............................................................................................................................................